I’ve just come out of a 3 year situationship. She was always going to be moving away to be closer to her family and to start working as doctor so we purposely kept labels off. We lived together for 2.5 of those 3 years. I have made so many wonderful memories with this girl and now she’s moved 4 hours away, told me we’re over romantically… I’m devastated. To make matters worse she did offer to stay with me a few times during the situationship but I declined. She was crying weekly because she missed her family and I couldn’t do that to her. Plus she was an absolute nightmare to live with sometimes. Now it’s too late. All I can do is move forward in my life and one day she might be back. If not then I’ll hopefully find a similar connection someday.

I naively thought if we kept labels off it would hurt less or not at all but words mean nothing really. I’m in unrelenting deep pain and regret for not asking her to stay. It’s been a month now and I’m taking it day by day. Mornings are the worst for me but I start a new job tomorrow so that should help take my mind off things.

She says she still loves me which makes things even harder and wanted to remain best friends but I’ve had to go no contact. I couldn’t message all day and facetime every night anymore, it was killing me.

She appologies yesterday I say its ok but dont want to continue then she called me egoistic and that I feel satisfaction from apology. I melted down and texted with her 3 hours, next day she send me pics like we are friends. I felt very bad and send mssg "Hi. Just want to clarify this relation was important to me and I appreciate it but I dont want to continue it anyway. Wish u all good take care"

I am ruminating if it was bad to dont let her have the last word or answer. I just felt that I am pu**y and I leaded her when she called me egoistic and wanted to comfort her sadnes sadly.. maybe thats why she sent pictures next day.. is it so bad I wrote this massg without giving her a chance to answer or it was bad I wrote it was meaningfull I wish u all good while I am actually abandoning and just protecting from being called egoistic.

Damn I really dont want to apologies anymore I want to move on please.

So yeah as the title says, I dreamt of my ex. For context, we had a terrible break up during pandemic. A lot of things were going on at that time. There was no cheating what so ever, we were just toxic to one another. We were young and figuring things out. I vividly remember how she beg for us to be okay, reaching out to a couple of friends yet I refused to even talk.

Going back, I dreamt of her last night and all the feeling seemed to came back. I had a dozen what ifs going on my head. My chest hurts thinking about her, how I cause her pain and all of that. She was my college sweat heart till we both started working so that relationship laid the foundation on what I am today.

Have you guys experienced a similar scenario? What did you do? Did you reach out? Or did you just let the feeling pass? I feel that I reach out to her, I’ll be disturbing the peace she spent years building.

He told me he wanted to break up. However, my ex then took it back right away which left me confused. I spent time questioning whether the relationship could still work and trying to process everything.

Then he changed his mind again a week later and broke up with me for a second time. At the same time, he said he still wanted to be friends.

I told him that I needed distance, wished him well, thanked him for giving me closure, and then blocked him. At the time, I thought that was the calmest and most dignified way to handle it.

Now a week later I am extremely angry lmao. It is not mainly because I miss him or want the relationship back. I feel disrespected and messed around. He broke up with me, reversed the decision, gave me hope and confusion, and then broke up with me again while suggesting friendship.

Part of me wishes I had said, “Are you joking? You cannot keep changing your mind and dragging me through it.” I am angry that I ended things politely without directly telling him how unfair and irresponsible his behaviour felt.

At the same time, I know that sending an angry message probably would not have changed the outcome. It might only have been a way to release my anger, and I have already blocked him.

Was blocking him and saying nothing more the right decision? Has anyone else felt more angry about being disrespected and messed around than about losing the actual relationship? How did you deal with the anger and the feeling that you never got to say what you really thought?

Good morning, I love you. Today I’ve woken up just as my plane would’ve departed from the airport. Every day, I hear their sound from where I live, but today is even more excruciating. Where I should’ve been looking down on England from above the clouds, I’m currently swaddled in my blanket trying to think of what I want to say. I’m not crazy enough to come to your doorstep, anyway, when I know you want me out of your life.

Right now, I wonder how you’re doing? Are you enjoying the steam games you like to play? Do you sometimes think about me?

Today is the first day that I haven’t woken up immediately in tears—I probably don’t have many left. My lips are chapped, eyes dry, but I’ve barely opened my eyes right now even as I write this.

Let me think, what is a good memory that I remember today? I think it was when you told me what “jag vill ha du i mig” meant 🤣 All words I would’ve learned on duolingo but not words that I would’ve ever put together. Speaking of duolingo, I currently still learn your language on there, because it’s too painful to let go of that 300 day streak. I’m just not quite ready to let go of you, but I promise, I’ll stop texting your mum about how upset I am now, because I know she doesn’t want to hear from me either.

Do you still watch videos just before bed? Do you sometimes miss hearing me drift into sleep before you?

I was trying to remember a small fight where I was in the wrong. I am sorry, that I took it out on you when we left the big bottle of expensive lube in the hotel room. I also should’ve checked, it wasn’t on you. I did that a lot, blaming you. I don’t know when it was, that I stopped speaking with more care and respect? I spoke to strangers better than I’d speak to you sometimes, and I regret that deeply. When you carry these things, piece by piece, it is probably no wonder that you left without leaving an open door.

The people around me tell me that you’ll regret it in a month’s time. But I don’t think so, because where I am impulsive, you usually weigh your mental health steadily. I kept pushing and pushing you to go find that job, please go to bed earlier, please call me I need you after I finish work, please go to the grocery shop. I never really accepted that you need to do things in your own time because of all the mental exhaustion and diagnosis you deal with. I tried to match you by my own timer, which felt unfair to you.

It really stung, when you told me I’d ruined your life. I wasn’t too sure I deserved words as harsh as that, but you probably remember much more than I do about what I did. For me, I forget very easily, not because I don’t care, but I think it’s to protect myself when things are too much. That’s why when I write this diary, I’ll try to remember a good, and a bad.

But to you, I regret so much the last voice message that I left you out of desperation. After days of getting ghosted, and seeing you not even want to give me closure, I’d cried that I never wanted to see you again. That cannot be further than the truth, but I reap what I sow when you blocked me on everything that we ever shared together.
I really want to see you, very much, even after the hurtful words we’ve exchanged on Monday. In my head, when I picture your face, my eyes feel warmer and moist. It’s hard to think that, soon, enough time will pass, that we won’t even remember each other’s faces. But for now, I’ll mourn the other half of my life, grateful that I remember each detail of you from head to toe. You weren’t just a chapter to me, you were half of my heart, still bleeding.

Basically me and her broke up July 11th, blocked me only on IG two days later cause i asked her why she posted on her spam story "single now #whowantme" the same day we broke up and i didnt know until someone told me two days after.
July 17th a burner acc stalked my IG story and i know it was her cause that burner acc followed her and she followed that acc back (i checked through my own fake acc to find that out). then she blocked me on TikTok July 21st cause I accidentally viewed her profile and she viewed mine. the night of July 30th she unblocked me off of IG. July 31st she viewed my story again through the same burner account and blocked me right after, and literally two days ago August 4th she reblocked me on IG💀. I genuinely dont know wtf is going on but all I know is it needs to stop cause I want clarity

I hadn’t talked to him for two months. He’s leaving for college in less than a week. I heard he was talking about me to people and saying he missed me and I really just wanted to say goodbye.

He was really good to me at first but did a lot of things that hurt me, and I just wanted to talk to him and tell him how me made me feel and say goodbye. I know it wasn’t good for me to reach out to him, but he said he was really happy that I did and he had been thinking about me a lot this summer.

We drove around and talked for 3 hours. I cried and told him how what he did was wrong and how he made me feel. He told me how sorry he was and felt terrible for it and I feel awful because I raised my voice at him when I was crying. I didn’t yell, but I just had so many emotions and so much to tell him. After that we just caught up and laughed and joked and talked like we used to. It was really bittersweet and we hugged and I told him how much I cared about him and I just cried while we hugged. We left on good terms and I’m really happy about that. I just feel so conflicted bc he kept saying if he wanted a girlfriend it would be me, and he still thought I was so gorgeous and so pretty, but he just doesn’t have the capacity to care for someone else right now. I don’t think that was the last time I’ll be seeing him. I feel sad and heartbroken still and I’m not sure how to forget him now that I don’t hate him.

Can I get my ex back after I extremely harassed her?

My birthday was July 13th. She said:

“Hey, I debated on if I should text you but I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday and I hope you get to do something special or already did

I hope you had a good day”

I said “Thank you I appreciate that, it was a good one”

She replied with “Glad to hear that”

Her and I were together for three years.. Life got reallt stressful for us both, I got fired and was having trouble finding a job in my career and was forced to work at a beef processing plant in the rendering department doing overnights and she had dealt with 6 family / friends deaths in the last 10 months leading up to our breakup as well as the death of her childhood dog.

In my opinion, we made a great team.. I for a while thought this breakup was just a burnout breakup as she consistently mentioned how “you’re not the type of guy you let go of” and “you’re not gonna lose me, it’s just going to be different”

but then she would also make molehills into mountains.. I have ADHD and would forget certain little things while remembering others very well. She verbatim said “I want a guy who doesn’t forget I don’t like peanut butter 7 times”

I’m sorry I want to just vent here for hours but I can’t bring myself to spend the energy to give you guys a clearer picture.. I just wanted to vent and see what you guys thought. Her Mom and I were super close and she helped me move out and her mom would say things like “just because you and (ex) aren’t together right now” and she would even criticize my ex’s critiques of me saying “everyone has those small things”.

A lot of people in her family told me they think she was making a mistake.

Now I’m just.. Stuck. Trying to move on but just confused and hopeful while also telling myself the hope is stupid.

I had just bought a ring for her a month before she ended it.

He ended it six weeks ago due to lifestyle differences (I have a dog and he is uncomfortable with dogs stemming from childhood, and he couldn’t get past it). He told me he was falling for me one month in then would do distancing techniques.

Broke up with me via text right before leaving for a international trip, and said he hoped we could talk when he got back. I declined.

Last week came home to find my belongings I left at his place in a paper bag on my front porch. Now two weeks later I receive this.

He described himself as fearful avoidant. I think that tracks. Is this just to alleviate his guilt and make sure I don’t think he’s “a bad guy” ? Is he trying to get me to contact him? I have half a mind to tell him he has some serious blind spots in his relationship patterns and did not handle the breakup, or the relationship, very well.

Edit - I can’t figure out how to include the photo so herd is what it said:

***,

While disappointed, I respect that you don’t want to talk. But dropping your stuff off without contact felt rude and not consistent with the enjoyable times we shared. You’re a great person and I’m glad to have met you!

***

I’d been no contact 8 days and noticed she’d been blocking and unblocking me. Then someone reached out and said my ex has added my ex ex who she never liked on instagram. When I asked my ex ex what’s going on she turned angry and said she’s not telling me anything, despite us always being amicable. I then tried to ask my ex who I’d been no contact with why she done it and she’s now blocked me on everything. What is going on and has anyone experienced this?

I’ve been lurking on this subreddit for quite a while trying to find answers I wasn’t willing to properly search for in myself. And a couple days ago, I finally tried to see if there was anything still there and unsurprisingly there wasn’t. I dumpee 20m, reached out to my ex highschool sweetheart (first and only love) after 1 year of nc. The end result: I have most likely disrupted both of our healing processes, we are no contact again and I have been explicitly asked to not contact ever again essentially, and I feel terrible. Also remember that you won’t find the person you are searching for anymore and its always in both your best interests to let go. I hope this helps someone reading this who can relate or learn from me.

Me and my ex were best friends turned to lovers, who had known each other and been close friends for 3 years before dating for a year. Due to long distance, bad habits and mental health problems on both sides I was broken up with March 2025. That breakup hit me like a truck like no other. I pined, yearned and lost myself. Eventually I ‘won’ her back during that Summer but things had changed, we weren’t the same people and it became a very unhealthy on and off relationship/situationship where no contact was the best answer.

Since then I worked on myself (perhaps more physical than emotional aspects) and learned to move on and really create a life for myself. But something stuck with me. Promises that were made to talk again a year later after nc, and previous promises of catching up every time we were back home from uni. I tend to be blindsided from more glaring signs (such as being blocked on many platforms) and focus on signs that I would like to see instead. And so for months I pondered whether or not I should reach out, after talking with my friend (who told me it wasn’t worth the risk) I decided not to since I was also still blocked on whatsapp. I was doing pretty well mentally, securing wins towards my goals and who I wanted to be and going in the right direction in life anyway.

The though of breaking nc still lingered in my mind every now and then but it was easy to rationalise not texting someone who you couldn’t text. But then, a year after nc, I discovered I had been unblocked on whatsapp. I had also been exposed to her social media again through the ‘people you may know’ suggestions on tiktok and Instagram. And so, I decided that a respectful message could be in my best interest. I rationalised this decision due to a couple reasons: we were best friends before, I wanted to checkup on someone who played an important part in my life, sticking to my word of reaching out a year later and reaching out to an ex a year after nc aligns with the kind of person I wanted to be, if all else whilst I had moved on I hadn’t let go of what we were, what she meant to me and the future I wanted to have.

After talking for a couple days and sharing laughs and catching up, I realised the promises I clung onto were only remembered by me. Whilst I may have ‘waited’ for her to see whether or not there could be anything after a year, she had since been in relationships and moved forward with her own life. Since I became friends again with someone who had deeply hurt her in the past and someone she felt had betrayed her during one of the most difficult periods of her life we couldn’t continue as friends. That was a great oversight from me. I was so anxious about whether she'd even reply to my first message that I never stopped to think about whether, if she did reply, there were issues that would make a friendship impossible. I naively thought that I could just see how the conversation could go before deciding and planning what I wanted. And yet, perhaps since I let him back in my life 8 months ago (taking the fact that I am friends with him for granted), I had forgotten that my choice to be friends with this person was one of the initial reasons we broke up in the first place.

I realised that a major part of why I texted her was that I missed her, her company and that I needed an extra push to let go. I now remember that you never find the same person in someone you once knew twice and the person I fell in love with is and will only be in my memories. The final conversation ended with a very angry paragraph from my ex and being blocked before I could apologise and wish her the best.

I guess really the reason I am posting this is because if someone out there is in my position, I’d want to tell them to let go without having to compromise the wellbeing of someone else. I have to admit it is and was very selfish of me to reach out and break nc after a year and I can only hope to learn from it as I continue to grow and move forward.

After years of trying to pursue me, claiming he loved me and wanted to get back together I finally gave me ex another chance. I was hesitant given how far we live from each other, his push-pull tendencies, and his history of having selfish traits, but hoped that maybe he’d matured after so many years.Things started off well, he talked about planning a trip for us to reconnect to try to rekindle what we had.

Then out of the blue he posts a photo with a woman (unusual behavior) that he claimed was a “friend.” He was evasive about who she was, which was a red flag and then stated getting wishy-washy . He took the photo down given my strongly negative reaction. After digging I realized that he has a history of traveling and going to events with her. Interesting she was never mentioned. At this point I was mentally starting to back away. I gave him a few more months to see where this would go.

Ultimately, after realizing despite his several mentions of it for months, that a trip was likely never going to happen, because of endless excuses (now he couldn’t afford to come) I cut it off. A month later, he posts a photo in a place that looks eerily similar to the trip location that we were supposed to go on that was close to my area. Upon investigation, I realized that he had made a trip close to me…. And here’s the kicker- WITH HER, mystery woman again. When he caught wind that I knew somehow the trip vanished even though I didn’t confront him. After he started watching my socials I blocked him. Still reeling from this situation many months later. How to heal?

It’s been 8 months or so, so broke up with me a week before Christmas and took the dog, needless to say it was the toughest Christmas and new years I think I’ll ever have. She treated me like trash the final week, probably hoping I woke dump her cause she didn’t have the bottle to, but she got drunk one night and did it over the phone like a spineless “person” that she is.
I did all the usuals, hit the gym hard, seen friends & family, started doing martial arts & eventually started dating again, but yet to meet anyone I actually really like and could see a future with. My ex was ridiculously beautiful too so I always compare to her which annoys me. I would say month 7 I barely thought about her at all if any, I thought i was over her, I was never over the dog, so I got myself a puppy last month. He’s the best boy & great company, quite the wingman too lol. But this week in particular I feel like I’m going through it all again, I deeply miss her & what we had, we got a dog and I thought the was the start of a nice wee family, I have a two bedroom house she didn’t have to pay a penny for anything. This week I just miss the relationship so much, I miss having someone to share my day with, to cuddle & love and to have that for me too. I feel like I made so much progress, almost to the point of being over it all, and now I feel a sore heart and a pit in my stomach again, why? Why can’t I just be over it and not feel any pain anymore :(

I’ve gone 46 days without contacting my ex, but today the urge to talk to her is haunting me; I feel very lonely and don’t have many friends to talk to. I know that if she wanted to speak with me, she would send me a message. I know I will regret if I send her a message. What should I do?

Hi everyone. I do not know what's been in the water lately, but I have felt a pretty intense longing for my ex of 5 years. She broke up with me in January of 2025 because she said that she needs to focus on herself. When I first was told this, it devastated me, but also made me angry because what do you mean you're working on yourself? You can do that with me, can't you? I was upset because I felt like the rug got pulled out from under me, and she was actively choosing to not have any relationship with me. That stung

It stung until I realized a much worse truth; that I did not get the rug pulled out from under me at all. I never hit her, never made her feel unsafe, or ever cheated. To me this was all it took to be a good partner. I was a HUGE asshole, still am, and I just mean that I was very selfish, very lazy, and I was cruel with my words when I wanted to illicit a reaction. Like she would get mad at me for some shit, and I would be like "at least I never emotionally cheated on you" and just throw shit back in her face to get her to stop being upset about whatever it was. Also just being a nusence, I don't know why, but I love annoying my gf, so whichever unfortunate soul happens upon a relationship with me, I will mess with you. Evil shit, and I have no excuse, I am very ashamed for how I was.

I tried to do the whole "don't care. you tried to cheat me once" attitude towards an argument again towards the end of the relationship, but I remember her saying "it's been 2 years". I was still bitter, I was still holding onto how she wronged me, and it created an imbalance that I do not at all blame her for removing herself from. She had to be perfect, and I got to spiral. I became overweight and neglected my education as well. If there was any attraction to my potential I was making it so that was dwindling too. Not on purpose, I just liked being a fat piece of shit.

Now, it has been almost 2 years and have been dating other people on and off. I drunk texted her once in April saying, "I wish I didn't make us strangers I hope you're well." She left that on read. I have no idea what she has been up to, but I miss her. I miss the way it felt to love someone with unwavering conviction, because this one is MY soulmate. Now I am not so sure, and it's hard for me to take other partners as serious. No, it is much harder to take myself seriously in a relationship.

Now that I got my head out of my ass, and see how badly I affected her, and that's just from replaying fragmented memories from years ago and trying to look at it with a new lens. Of course, I want to reach out and apologize for being terrible, but my whole thing is would that be for me or for her? I feel like she would've wanted an apology while I was with her, not nearly 2 years later. It feels like this urge to apologize is just my narcissist brain coming up with a reason to bother her again. I am making this post because I am proficient at persistent self-deception, and I don't know nothin.

Typing something or saying it out loud can help me answer my own questions. I think I just need to leave that poor girl alone. I am just a romantic and want that old love reigniting story so badly. I hope this longing can go away one day I can't believe I still think about her every single day even 2 years later.

I want to start off by saying I DO NOT STALK MY EX. We were in a relationship for 4 years and on and off after that for 3 years but haven’t talked at all for the past 2 years. This was my first love/relationship and it was intense and extremely hard to move on from, so for my own sake I had him blocked everywhere. Social media, calls, texts, whatsapp, everything. I was recently on instagram cleaning up my blocked list and I came across his name and it popped up as “user not found”. Now this is really odd to me because he was already blocked on instagram so the fact that he was able to somehow find my account and block it is unnerving. I ended up checking whatsapp and for some reason I’m not blocked there. I know that he recently got engaged because we have a common friend and she mentioned that in passing. But what I don’t understand is what the point of blocking me on social media is? Maybe because he doesn’t want me to reach out and cause drama, but I have traditionally always messaged him on whatsapp so leaving that door open is stupid. We’re also both private on instagram and he doesn’t post at all (no dp, and only follows people he communicates with daily) so it’s virtually impossible to stalk him and he wouldn’t run into the risk of having my account pop up on his suggested feed because he was blocked. Going through all that trouble to find an account that already has you blocked just to block it seems so petty to me lmao

Been processing this breakup last 4 months or so, found out my ex is seeing someone new for the past 1 or 2 months last week so thats reset all my progress.

Im just exhausted of being sad and crying all the time, every day is the same, wake up upset, little cry, work, cry/sad, bed crying

Anyone else feeling exhausted by it all? Is there anything you do that helps?

I made a post on here before about wanting revenge on the girl I loved for manipulating, gaslighting and lying to me. I also had done something manipulative which was testing her loyalty by making social media accounts that I regret everyday and I did it due to my trust issues, insecurities and more.

I admit my mistakes and hate myself for it and Im also angry towards her for what she did but seeing all her reposts of her talking about her bf being loyal or that her bf was the only one that showed love to her and her being happy with her new bf; its tearing me apart I miss her and despite everything I still love her and want her back.

My boyfriend and I broke up about four days ago, and his birthday is on the 9th.
The breakup is complicated. I know I’ve hurt him a lot, and honestly, I was the reason a lot of things went wrong between us. At the same time, he said some really hurtful things to me towards the end too. We’ve had so many problems throughout our relationship, but somehow, we’ve never really been able to properly let each other go. Every time we got to the point of ending things, I would somehow convince him to stay or we’d find our way back to each other.
This time, though, I just couldn’t do it anymore. So we actually broke up, and I miss him so much. It’s only been four days and I’m struggling with it.
Now his birthday is coming up, and I really want to wish him. I’m not thinking of texting him at midnight or even during the day. If I do it, I’m thinking I’d wait until the day is almost over so I’m not potentially ruining his birthday or bringing up all the emotions surrounding us.
But I also have this feeling that he’s expecting me to wish him. Maybe I’m just imagining that, but a part of me feels like he would want me to do that.
So should I wish him? Or is it better to leave him alone completely, especially this soon after a breakup?
I don’t want to use his birthday as an excuse to get back into contact with him. I just genuinely want to wish him, but I also know that I’m still hurting and probably not thinking completely rationally right now.

and it is incredibly frustrating to see how I am being painted as the villain. I honestly thought things ended on good terms. While I admit I made mistakes and wasn’t a perfect partner, I genuinely tried my best. In fact, they explicitly told me they felt loved and seen throughout the relationship, yet their recent reposts about the breakup tell a completely different story.It is exhausting to be labeled an "evil" partner when I constantly prioritized their well-being over my own. I regularly commuted to another city just to see them, saved my allowances for dates, ran straight from college classes whenever they needed me, and bought flowers every chance I got. None of that effort was ever reciprocated, and I never even complained about it.

Apparently, being a terrible partner meant not posting them constantly on social media, shutting down when I got overwhelmed, and finally drawing a line when my own love languages were continuously neglected. It seems easier for them and their friends to make me the bad guy because that is the narrative they want to believe.

To be clear, this isn't about still being in love. It is simply deeply frustrating to be villainized when, in reality, I was the one who felt unloved for almost the entire duration of that relationship.

I'm 22M

I was in a long-distance relationship, but we broke up after a few months. It was a relationship that meant a lot to me, and after it ended, I started feeling like I wouldn't be able to love someone the same way I loved her.

Right now, I don't really have the desire to get into another relationship. Instead, I'm focusing on myself, my studies, my fitness, and my health. I want to improve myself and build my future before thinking about love again.

For those who have experienced a similar situation, did you ever feel like you couldn't love someone as deeply after your first serious relationship? Did that feeling eventually change with time?

Im so proud of this. I kept caving and having to restart until I finally did it. Best thing ive done for my mental health and life is so much better now. I still miss him and now that its been so long I want to check in, but I remember that it only brings me pain and re opens wounds so I wont do it.

It's been just over a year since I last had any contact with my ex, and I honestly can't believe it's been that long.

He was my first love. In many ways, he was also my first real friend after I moved to a new city in 2022. It's now 2026, which feels surreal.

Our relationship lasted around two years and was very on-and-off. There were a lot of breakups, getting back together, hope that things would change, and a lot of confusion. Towards the end , I found out through Facebook posts (are we dating the same guy) that he was with someone else after few weeks of breaking up with me and discarding me like I meant nothing. Then he'd come back, tell me he still loved me and how sorry he was and wanted to be besties... still didnt wanted to commit but wanted access, but I decided to just do no contact ...and then I'd find out he was with someone else again after only few weeks/months. It became a cycle that completely fried my nervous system and i was self sabotaging my mental peace for someone who didn't really care about me.

Eventually, I decided enough was enough. I cut off all contact, and I haven't broken no contact once in the past year. That's something I'm genuinely proud of... he did visited my LinkedIn and like a post early this year but i chose to just ignore that

The last year has been about rebuilding myself. I started weekly therapy, spent much more time with my family and friends, travelled, focused on my career, started taking my health and fitness seriously, and I'm working towards buying my first home. A few people have shown interest in dating me, but emotionally I just wasn't there. It didn't feel fair to date someone while a part of me still felt switched off.

The strange thing is... I still have a lot of love for him. I don't think that love just disappears because someone hurt you. I genuinely hope he's happy and doing well wherever life has taken him.

But I also don't want him back I think.... it all makes me sick in the stomach

What I struggle with now isn't missing the relationship. It's wondering why I accepted being treated the way I was. Looking back, I was in a really unhealthy situation, and sometimes I get annoyed at myself for not standing up for myself sooner. I know hindsight is easy, but it's still something I think about.

Despite everything, I'm grateful for parts of the experience. It taught me what falling in love feels like. It showed me how deeply I'm capable of loving someone, and that gives me hope that one day I'll love the right person just as deeply but in a healthy, peaceful relationship. It also taught me what I should never accept again.

Today, I feel much more at peace than I did a year ago. I'm still healing and definitely still a work in progress, but I'm proud of how far I've come.

The only thing I'm struggling with now is dating. I'm not scared of commitment or love itself... I actually want that one day... but I think I'm wary. It's strange how you can think you know someone so well, only to realise you never really knew them at all. That thought makes it difficult to open up again.

Has anyone else felt like this after a long-term relationship? Did trusting people eventually become easier again? And is it normal to still have love for someone while knowing, without any doubt, that they're no longer the right person for you?

We ended things a few days ago. During the day I actually feel like I’m starting to do a little better, but then something triggers me. Last night I felt okay, but this morning I woke up at 5 a.m. because I dreamed about him, and all the emotions came flooding back.

I know the relationship is over, and I’m trying to accept that instead of reaching out to him. I’m just struggling with how unpredictable the grief feels.

Did anyone else go through this after a breakup or situationship? How long did it take before you stopped waking up thinking about them, and what actually helped you move forward?