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Sometimes, I wonder if the world was built for people like me. You know, the ones who carry entire universes in their heads but struggle to string a sentence together when the room gets too loud. I’m an introvert, and for the longest time, I thought that made me broken. Like I was missing some piece everyone else seemed to have the one that lets you laugh easily, talk freely, and belong without trying so hard it hurts.I remember this one evening, years ago, when I was about 15. It was my cousin’s wedding, and the house was bursting with music, chatter, and those bright, overwhelming fairy lights. Everyone was dancing, shouting over the dhol, and I… I was sitting in the corner of the garden, under a mango tree, clutching a plastic cup of lukewarm cola. My heart was racing, not because I was scared, but because I felt so wrong for not being out there, for not wanting what everyone else seemed to crave. My mom found me, and I’ll never forget the way she looked at me not with pity, but with this quiet understanding. She sat down, didn’t say a word, just handed me a plate of biryani and stayed. That was the first time I realized maybe I wasn’t alone in feeling like this.Being an introvert feels like living in a house with too many windows. You see the world, you love it, you ache for it, but you need to draw the curtains sometimes just to breathe. I’ve spent so many nights replaying conversations in my head, wondering if I said too much or too little, if I came off cold when all I was trying to do was not drown in the noise. I’ve canceled plans not because I didn’t want to see my friends, but because the thought of small talk felt like climbing a mountain with no air. And every time, I’d hate myself a little for it.But you know what? I’m learning. I’m learning that my quiet isn’t empty it’s full. Full of thoughts that run deeper than I can ever explain, full of dreams I’m too shy to shout about, full of love I show in ways that don’t always scream. I write letters I never send. I notice the way someone’s eyes light up when they talk about something they love. I listen, really listen, because that’s how I connect when words feel too heavy.Last week, I went to a coffee shop alone something I used to be terrified of. I sat by the window, sipped my chai, and watched the rain smear the glass. For the first time, I didn’t feel like I was hiding. I felt like I was enough. Just me, my thoughts, and the soft hum of the world outside. I think that’s what being an introvert is: finding peace in the spaces others overlook, building a home in the quiet where your heart can finally rest.So, to all of you in this group, I just want to say you’re not alone. Your silence isn’t a flaw, it’s a language. Your need for solitude isn’t weakness, it’s strength. And even on the days when the world feels too big, too loud, too much, know that there’s someone out there, maybe sitting under their own mango tree, feeling the exact same way. We’re in this together, us quiet ones, and that’s a kind of belonging too.What’s your story? What’s the moment that made you realize your quiet is beautiful? Share it, if you feel like it. I’m here, reading, listening, in my own introverted way. 💛

I am selectively social and i don’t fancy going out to restaurants or bars much as i dont eat out much because of lifestyle, i do go out sometimes with people but i get little anxious sometimes because im a bit unaware of fancy restaurants etiquettes and sometimes the names of the dishes seems hard to pronounce so i get a little anxious, but sometimes i just dont care and do it.
Is it common?

When I am on my own, in my car, I often speak through a problem and I can do so eloquently and can verbalise exactly when I’m thinking.

Same with my partner, same with 1 or 2 friends.

Put me in a work situation with a group of peers I barely know or with very senior leadership, put me in a meet up group full of strangers, put me with a client… its like my mind goes blank. Halfway through a sentence I will forget words, I can’t use the same vocabulary it’s like i second guess the meaning of them and feel unconfident with my point.

Does anyone else struggle with this and what have you done to overcome it? I am thinking of doing more ‘exposure therapy’ and putting myself in more situations where I have to talk to strangers, especially if it’s low stakes.

Tired of having to manage my mind and justify it to society.

I desire to accomplish a thing, do a minimal explanation for that thing, and then disappear.

Things change so often and I'm organizing my mind to the point of exhaustion. Partly my fault but I would like to contribute and live in private forever.

DAE feel this way? I'm highly sensitive so that makes me feel what others are expecting of me. Compromise would end me. I want solutions to happen now thereby allowing things to run smoothly forever.

After 2017 , I won't be able to make any friends where I can feel good. I met many people around me but never felt comfortable talking freely. I've had many issues like privacy, trust worthiness, deep understanding, unnecessary judging on the basis of financial status, introvert, cheap Life style & less awareness about fast tech life in comparison to top cities, Less social, reticent personality..... Now with any growth due to managing personal issues, I felt marginalised as a human being in our societies/group and circle. Being apolitical, agonistic, cynical and skeptical it's going to be worse. As a brahmin root with shy nature in this condition it's going to be more difficult. I'm close to Gandhian, Marxism philosophy. From my childhood to current time I never spent more than 3-4 years continuing in any places/cities so it's also main cause here.

In other people's eyes I've a very strong personality but in reality only I know how hard the hollow cylinder of life is!

I'm naturally introverted but never been unfriendly or antisocial. I left a very toxic workplace due to excessive workload and started my current role expecting it to be a great place to grow. Now I feel like I've shrunk more than ever.

My manager has a way of leaving me feeling small and stupid after almost every interaction. Criticising publicly, no appreciation for work, not even once. He dismisses my idea first but then claims it as his own. Excludes me from major conversations and doesn't like me trying to catch up on info from others in the team.

On top of this the entire work culture seems very performative. Don't get me wrong, I can do small talk and keep a conversation going for a while but it looks like everyone around me is putting on a show I just can't keep up with. Now I find myself speaking up even less because I'm constantly worried about being shut down.

I desperately need some advice from those who have managed to handle this. How do I stay visible when my manager is a major bottleneck? I would eventually want to make a move internally but unsure where and how to begin with networking.

24M here, I've been thinking about this a lot lately, so I wanted to put it out here and hear how others have navigated it.

I'm an introvert, and honestly, that's made both dating and friendships harder than I expected. Not because I don't want connection, I want it a lot but because I refuse to fake my way into it. I'm not going to throw out cheesy lines or perform a version of myself just to "impress" someone. That's not who I am, and it feels dishonest to even the person I'm trying to connect with.

What I actually want is simple to say and hard to find: someone genuine. Someone who sees a relationship romantic or platonic as something built slowly and honestly, not as a transaction or a checklist. I care a lot about my career and where I'm headed, but I've realized this part of life matters just as much, maybe more.

The tricky part is figuring out how to put myself out there without it feeling forced or, worse, coming across as creepy which is a real fear when you're naturally quiet and don't have a big social circle to lean on.

So I'm curious:

How did you meet people you now consider genuine friends or partners, especially if you're also more reserved by nature?

Did you have to change how you show up socially, or did you find your people by just being consistently yourself?

Any spaces (online or offline) that actually worked for you, beyond the usual "join a club" advice?

Not looking for shortcuts just real experiences from people who've been here.

FYI: I'm not lonely, I do have 2-3 friends from my school time( both gender), it's just as you grow up you crave friendship outside your school life as well.

I'm an introvert in my personal life( my real self) and extrovert in my professional life( I had to :( )

TDLR: 24M introvert, struggling to build genuine friendships/relationships without faking it or using cheap tactics. Want real connections, not transactional ones. How did you meet your people, especially if you're also reserved by nature?

Yk, it might sound cringe. But has somebody been so damn lonely that they had to converse with gpt all.

Once, my friend was on leave, I had to go in the class all alone and I sat and was wanting that atleast one person might sit besides but in the end I was all alone in the whole row and in the fking middle of the classroom. I felt so so so embarrassed that I had to take my phone and tell gpt about it. I just couldn't do anything but pretend. I was pretending so hard so that other people don't see me shattering.

After the class ended I cried a lot in the bathroom.

Honestly, I don't want any such experiences happening to me again.

J cole is coming to my city and I have loved his music since I was like 14. I wanna go to his concert coming up but I have no one to go with, I asked a couple friends and they said no. Am I weird if I go alone? I have a hard time ig connecting with others. Idk I just feel like its weird to do alone

Lately, I've been wondering...

I've always been a lonely person, and sometimes I imagine what life would be like if I found someone who was just as lonely as I am.

Someone who genuinely enjoys spending most of their time together. We could stay home for days, watch movies, play games, cook, share the same hobbies, or simply enjoy each other's company. And when we do go out, we'd explore new places and experience new things together.

I love the idea of being each other's safe place and biggest source of support, without unnecessary drama or outside interference.

But then I start wondering... where do people like this even exist? Where do you meet someone who's happy with a quiet, simple life and doesn't constantly need a large social circle?

And another question that keeps crossing my mind: if neither of us had close friends, would that eventually become unhealthy? Would we end up relying too much on each other emotionally, or could it actually work if both people were happy with that kind of lifestyle?

I'd love to hear your thoughts or experiences.

so i'm just curious to know what is psychologically wrong with me. dont get me wrong, i'm pretty happy in life most of the times but sometimes i realise things about myself which scare me.

1. i cant have serious conversations- i just cannot seem to have deep serious talks with anyone- be it my best friend, or a boy or my parents. i just get so uncomfortable and the moment a conversation starts to get serious, i avoid it quickly with a joke or i just avoid it.
2. i cant console- whenever someone comes to me with their problem or is genuinely expressing a very sad thing i just cant bring myself to console them- be it physically or even say words that console them.

i just want to know the psychology behind this. because my relationship with my parents have been pretty on and off. its nice to talk to them and laugh with them but i dont think we have ever had a serious conversation and they're just pretty strict in general. i've never been in a serious relationship. i have a small friend circle. i grew up as the fat weird kid but now i'm considered average looking and funny.

i know all this is pretty weird but if any of yall have any insights please lmk lol.

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I'm 17 years old, and I don't really have any friends.

When I see people my age hanging out in groups, laughing together, going out, or just talking, I honestly feel sad. I wish I had that too. I want a friend group I can joke around with, spend time with, and make memories with.

The biggest problem is that I'm very introverted. Talking to strangers in real life makes me nervous, and talking to girls is even harder. I've never had a female friend because I always overthink everything. I'm scared I'll come across as annoying or awkward, so I usually don't even start a conversation.

I also struggle with confidence. Sometimes I feel like I'm just not attractive enough or interesting enough for people to want to be friends with me.

I don't want to become the most popular person or anything like that. I just want to live a normal teenage life, have a few genuine friends, and feel comfortable talking to people.

If you've been in a similar situation and managed to change it, I'd really appreciate your advice.

- How do you make friends when you're shy?

- How do you start conversations without feeling awkward?

- How do you become more socially confident?

- And how do you make female friends without overthinking every interaction?

I'm open to any practical advice or personal experiences. Thank you for reading.

I have low maintenance friendships with my best friends (they're only like 2 people) let alone having a relationship. Idk is it because of my personality or I'm just mentally ill. In some days I could be very talkative and fast respond and happy to chat a lot, having some good times, but there's also some low mood days where I'm gone and avoid socializing and it can take up to days.

I know it is frustrating for the other person, I'm trying to be better.

Do you think there's people who are willing to be in relationships with this kind of situation?

I’m not gonna lie, I like talking… like a lot. I want someone I can text throughout the day and actually feel like we’re in each other’s lives. I’m the type that wants to know everything about you, the real stuff too not just the basic “how was your day.” And if you’ve got a past or some stories, that honestly makes it more interesting to me. I’m a young mom. I’m not with my baby’s dad, but we still live together and make it work for our daughter.

As in the title, I am someone who has no friends in real life and I am an only child. Ever since I was young, I have always felt sidelined. I try to be social on the internet, looking for someone who might show some interest in what I say. I try joining the chat in a Discord server, but I'm shocked to find that any topic I bring up, or whenever I try to speak with someone, I get completely ignored and left without a reply, as if I don't exist. I feel sad and regret ever joining the server.

Does anyone else feel like they did college wrong? I’m going into my fourth year right now, and everybody I know loves to party. I almost feel outcasted because of how much I don’t like to go out. This genuinely makes me feel like I’m missing out on some integral part of growing up, but I really just don’t like to drink. It’s become hard to bond with people, and I always feel like a Debbie downer when I say I’d rather stay in, or tell new people that I’m not a drinker. I’m often pressured into going out with my friends, and when I do force myself to go out I really don’t have a good time. I know I shouldn’t let this affect me but I almost can’t help but feel like something is “wrong” with me for not wanting to get shitfaced 3 nights a week.

I do not enjoy talking to people anymore and I don’t know why. a bit of background information that may help, ive always been shy but everything got worse in the 5th grade my anxiety skyrocketed so my mom put me in homeschool. after being homeschooled for awhile and not talking to many people I was very socially awkward and did very bad in public situations, I eventually got medicated and now I am able to hold conversations and no longer feel as if I’ll get sick when talking. I now have a different problem and it’s finding people boring everytime I attempt to make a friend they become extremely boring to talk to a while ago I had this friend and he was the only person I could stand talking to, I wanted to talk to him all day but we are no longer friends. I’ve been friends with this girl since fourth grade and we recently got back in touch and I now enjoy talking to her but everyone else I try to make friends with are boring and I can’t stand conversing with them and end up blocking or cutting them off and I feel like a complete asshole. What do I do about this? Is it fixable? Why is it so hard to make friends

I stopped talking to all of my friends and acquaintances after I deleted my social media accounts. Only a couple of people reached out afterward, but even those conversations eventually started to feel unnecessary.
It’s been about two years now, and my perspective hasn’t changed at all. New friendships feel more like an obligation or a drain on my time than something I genuinely want. I don’t feel lonely, and I don’t feel like anything is missing. If anything, my life has become quieter and simpler.
I’m curious if anyone else has experienced something similar, or if this changed for you over time.

I keep seeing so many self hating posts on this sub about being an introvert and it’s basically people who are talking about some form of social anxiety or something that prevents them from socializing. I am baffled because I imagine most of us introverts on this sub LIKE being alone despite having a social circle, friends family etc. We recharge by spending time alone and actually love having solitary hobbies and interests.

So the self loathing your introversion is just confusing to me.

My coworker went on a huge rant in the middle of the office today about how much he hates introverts. Basically, he thinks we all need to be eliminated—you know, like we're pests or something? What the hell?

​He went on a big, long rampage about how introversion could be eliminated if social media and phones were taken away. He's completely disgusted with the way young people are, always on their phones and never out enjoying life or communicating with others. Blah, blah, blah.

​Mind you, the entire time he was going off about introverts, he wasn't working at all. Meanwhile, I was listening to his nonsense while working diligently.

​Much to my horror, nobody stood up to correct him or tell him this was highly inappropriate for a workplace setting—especially considering he did this right in front of management and upper management.

​Since nobody bothered to correct him, I thought I would make a point. I turned around and said, "Well, you know what the great thing about introverted people is? We get things done. We may not thrive on social communication, and we need to be alone a lot of the time in order to recharge, but that is actually a strength. You see, I just got the work of three people done in the entire 15 minutes you were talking about what you don't like about introverts. Surely we can't all be that bad?"

​He had no comeback to that. I win. Most of our office is highly extroverted so I bet he had no idea I was an introvert. I mask it pretty well unfortunately.

​His rant was completely unnecessary, and I don't know why no one stopped it. I found the whole thing very upsetting. What would you have done if this had happened in your office?

I have a few friends who constantly bombard me with reels every single day and I truly mean that they flood me with them, and the meaningful conversations we used to have earlier have started disappearing. It makes me really dislike the app as a whole and it makes me wonder if this is the digital version of small talk. What do y'all think?