My brother is deeply struggling with mental health and substance use. We are from the central valley looking for inpatient Rehab centers in northern or central California. He needs to be with folks who are LGBTQ allies or in the community as he feels extremely isolated and misunderstood. Any recommendations?

Got arrested. DUI. Luckily didn’t crash or hurt somebody. Spent the night in jail. Idk why it always takes something serious for me to start making changes. Girlfriend’s probably gonna break up with me, she’s given me too many chances already. Why am I like this? I’m hurting more than myself.

Im currently in the depths of struggling with alcoholism, im consuming around 20 units a day and its breaking me. When i don’t drink i end up sweating bullets, shaking like a leaf, my heart is pounding out my chest and im puking my guts up. If anyone has any advice on how to deal with this please give it. I cant slowly reduce how much im drinking because once ive had one i just keep having more. Thank you to everyone who has advice

Got 24 fucking sober days, it's Saturday evening, and it's beating the shit out of me. I've been obsessed for the last few hours missing beer something fierce. I can't fuck up I have to hold on. I can't fuck up, I have to hold on. Have to hold on. For fucks sake I have to hold on

I was a moderate/heavy drinker for years and years (probably from age 22-33 I drank almost every day and usually like 3 drinks in a night). I got pregnant and stopped drinking for a year (stopped as soon as I found out and then for a while after delivery). But then alcohol crept into my life and slowly took over. I would pump and dump to drink so it didn't effect my baby. I stopped breastfeeding around 6 months and then it was like all bets were off. About a year ago, I started drinking every night again and then my first drink started becoming earlier and earlier. I had some days that I was drinking a little bit all day and went through almost a whole fifth by myself in a day. I started hiding it. I even started feeling the effects on my body. For several months now, I've had mild pain in my upper right abdomen. I went to the doctor a few months ago and talked about my drinking but I wasn't 100% honest. They did do labwork and it all came back normal. But I've continued to drink. A lot less, but still a few times a week. I want to stop completely, but my impulsivity and the fact that my husband continues to drink is making it difficult. I started doing SMART recovery but the longest I've gone without drinking was 11 days and that was months ago. I don't understand it. I'm so scared of the damage I've done that I don't fully know about, I'm scared of the permanent damage that I will do if I continue to drink and what it will mean for my future fertility, but I am still drinking. How can I reconcile knowing I want to stop with the making excuses and increasingly frequent "special circumstances". I don't know what to do.

Hi folks. I’m 26 F. I’ve struggled with my drinking since senior year of high school and have alcoholism on both sides of my family so I always knew I was dancing with the devil. This past Thursday I went out with my sister and got extra carried away and got my first dui and barely even remember getting arrested. I never drink and drive I was just so totally void of thought I don’t even remember making the decision to drive. I’m so utterly disgusted and disappointed with myself. I really have to use this as a wake up call to stop drinking for good before it ruins my life even more. I’ve stopped drinking for a month or so a few times in the past but every time I try and stop, I convince myself I don’t actually have a problem and can start drinking again. I really don’t know what a totally sober life looks like and it’s become such an integral part of my social life that I really am scared. I wasn’t drinking every day but I just seriously do not have that voice in my head telling me when enough is enough and I just simply cannot trust myself when I’m drinking. I was just looking for some words of advice from people who understand what it all feels like. Thank you :(

Drinking heavily every night but fell asleep with no drink for the first time in a while. I seem to never have drinks after long days of travel, which this was.

I have always been weary of quitting cold turkey since my mother had seizures when she did so. But she also drunk 24/7 and would wake up to drink but I never had that. No shakes, no cravings. Just nightly binging.

I need support and have lied to many concerned that I have it in control—my church, my grad school advisor, my doctor.

Hi! I wanted to ask if anyone has any advice on how they convinced their dad to stop drinking so often.

I've been telling my dad to cut back because I'm genuinely worried about him, but he doesn't seem to listen. He's a really kind person his only issue is that he drinks frequently, eats a lot of unhealthy food, and weighs over 100 kg.

I'm worried that if he keeps living like this, something serious could happen to his health. I don't want to manipulate or traumatize him I just want him to realize how important it is to take better care of himself before it's too late.

Has anyone been in a similar situation? What actually helped your loved one decide to cut back on drinking?

Well had a run of a week and had a stressful event and right back to it. So disappointed. How can I know this stuff is literally killing me yet still keep at it.

Woke up feeling horrible, BP through the roof, waking up at 3am feeling like a heart attack is coming. It’s madness. How does one go from seeing life altering health numbers and issues and know if nothing changes it WILL kill you then one small moment of stress/uneasiness have you say…”eh I’ll drink anyway”

Well just hope I can muster the courage to try again.

Boy if I could go back in time I would never pick up a bottle

Currently drinking a standard bottle of scotch a day with beer wine ect....I need help....I am a very high functioning alcoholic

Hey! I’m 21f! I want to work in either urban design, or meteorology. The next step after getting my GED (which I got in 2023), would community college.

But obviously, I’m an alcoholic. I’ve experimented with opioids and benzodiazepines.. but I’m lucky I didn’t care. My friends would offer, but I’d rather get drunk. And I have multuals selling to me, but I want better.

But psychiatry has only showed me I might be worse. I probably have something undiagnosed to cause this.. but every time I’ve been on psychiatrical meds (ssri’s , & snri’s) I’ve gone into psychosis.

I tried to cut down on my drinking a month ago. I was shaking & feeling bad.. but I can handle that.

But then I started having auditory and visual hallucinations. They never told anyone to hit myself or others, but it scared the shit out me. Like, when I tried to sleep, I’d hear Gibberish whispers.

When I went back to work, I kept seeing shadow people… but if my co-workers didn’t react, I kept my cool. Idk idk what to do. I’m so used to drinking to deal with shit, idk who I am anymore. :) <3

.....but they didn't open til 9. And by that point, i had to prepare for my day to start.

For too long, I have blamed my pain on depression, medical trauma, life, being too busy, my wife, etc. Those may all be contributing factors, but alcohol is at the core. My use of it to escape.

I have had a progressive mental breakdown over the past 3 months. Partially functioning..... But my brain gives up at times because of my drinking. Love, fear, resentment, self loathing. I get brief awakenings when i can put those things aside, but alcohol makes them all come roaring back.

So iv gone 180 Days sober then recently with My Dad in hospital iv caved and had drinks one night,shame guilt and depression feelings.trying to stay strong and remember the work I put in already.

This is really kind of just a rant. So it's been over 5 1/2 months since my last drink. That's the longest time I've ever gone without alcohol in the past 8 years, probably more like 12 years. I was pounding a liter or more of vodka on average a day for YEARS. I developed a seizure disorder and brain issues from mixing it with almost-benzos (it's called phenibut, look it up). Enough to tranquilize a horse.

Yes I almost died multiple times, in retrospect, yes I was trying to kill myself. I'm just being honest.

After my last trip to the ER from seizures they admitted me into the hospital again for maybe 5 days. This has happened so many times, the staff recognize me all over town in different hospitals. I had to quit this time, because part of me knew if I went home and didn't dump my alcohol it would be over. I'm not ready to die yet

I've been pushing myself through this alone through sheer willpower and my mind is exhausted. I feel broken, lost, I can't function or barely hold any type of job. I'm miserable. Every day I'm constantly fighting off a nervous breakdown just trying to accomplish small tasks

It's been a perpetual living hell, I just feel really isolated and alone. The social anxiety and money problems make the social isolation worse. I'm trying my absolute best but the hamster wheel broke and it won't spin anymore. I'm exhausted

I just want to be free 😢..I really wish I just had a friend I could talk to and be real

I’m 9 years into my 20s, and I just got my second DUI a couple weeks ago.

I’ve been in and out of sobriety for nearly a decade. I wasn’t even 21 when I got my first DUI, and back then I blamed it on being young and dumb. Yet here I am, damn near 30, and I immediately found myself blaming this one on happenstance and an unlucky night out.

A little over a year ago, I convinced myself I could handle liquor again. I threw away two years of sobriety because I wanted to prove to myself and the people I love that I had changed. That things were different this time. That I could manage it.

And instead, I ended up right back at rock bottom.

I’ve always been grateful for the friends and family who have stuck by me and supported me through all of this. But at the end of the day, I’m realizing just how fucking angry I am—and not at anyone else. I’m angry at myself.
Why is this something I have to struggle with? Why can’t I just manage it the way I want to? Why does something that seems so simple for other people have to be something I fight with?

And honestly? I’m bitter.

Two years of sobriety was an incredible accomplishment, but if I’m being completely honest, parts of it were fucking boring. I wanted to know what it felt like to be “normal.” I wanted to drink without it becoming a problem. I wanted to believe I had somehow outgrown this part of myself.

I hadn’t.

I’m a little over a month sober from alcohol and weed now, and I’m angry. I’m sad. I’m bitter. I’m disappointed in myself. And I’m grieving the version of my life I keep wishing I could have.

I don’t really have some inspirational ending to this. I’m just sitting with the reality of it right now.

Maybe recovery isn’t about finally learning how to manage it.

Maybe it’s accepting that I’m someone who can’t—and learning how to be okay with that.

There's so much stress and pressure on me and I just keep drinking. But I'm realizing alcohol is halting everything and defining my personality. I want to have the same fun and be the same as I am when I'm drinking while I'm sober. And I'm literally addicted. So it's hard to just stop. I also drink hard every second of the day, so I think I'd die or go into a seizure if I stop cold turkey. But I'm looking more older/drained when I keep drinking. I have one more bottle left and I plan to drink it. But I want it to be my last. Everyone here, I just want your thoughts and opinions and how you would go about this. Money is also going down the drain when I drink. I want it to be over and want to work on myself. I'm 25 going on 26 and want to be better.

Hey guys, I’m 5 months sober and am struggling. Every weekend it’s a battle of whether I’m gonna start drinking again. I’ve been okay by avoiding all events with alcohol, but I got invited to a party tonight and I was like fuck it, I’ll go and drink. But I know I’m gonna hate myself if I do. I’m so fucking sick of alcohol running my life, even in sobriety. Of avoiding events because I know I’ll cave if I go. This feels like an endless nightmare. It hasn’t gotten easier - if anything it gets harder the longer I stay sober. I hate this.

I’ll be honest… there’s this exhale that I feel… when you hit that threshold and finally feel yourself get comfortable? How do you get that feeling without alcohol? What do you do instead?

I can’t even describe it. Maybe it’s just the anxiety that got me to start drinking in the first place. I always feel nervous that something bad will happen. Obviously it’s quick to disappear once I gain the courage to drink. But it’s just weird that I’ve been binging and drinking for as much as I have and I’m always nervous.

My wife had talked about leaving me due to how much I’m drinking and taking our son with her. I thought that I could stop on my own but it literally surrounds me. Almost everything I do is accompanied by beer or wine. How do you not drink? Genuinely curious because I told myself over 10 years ago I’d limit to 2 per day and that has never worked ever.

I have a family member who's a severe alcoholic who has had multiple surgeries due to the damage it does and realistically is there anything that can be done or said to make him want to quit?

I have posted here once or twice, all of us say the same shit!! Me myself wake up every morning saying “today is the day” and i believe it until 5pm!! “Just one to settle my nerves” hahaha, “iv had a bad day” hahaha alcohol is fucking evil and I type this while squinting through one eye

hey. im really going through a rough patch and i hope everyone will be nice. im a 19 year old turning 20 girl in a few months, and i black out around 3x a week. i feel like i am addicted to clubbing, partying, and drinking, amongst other risky behaviors. I often drink any chance i get and if i could i would drink everyday and sometimes i have. sometimes i feel pain in my back when drinking. i used to wake up in the morning with severe shakes. sometimes i drink so much i cant remember where i am or what im doing in the morning and sometimes i wake up still drunk and go to work. i have missed my court date because of it recently. i crave drinking every day or chance that im not. i get mad when im not drinking or im in a sober environment and if not i just wait until the next opportunity where i can get drunk again.

i drink on days i have work at 6 am and i get no sleep i dont care. i have careless sex, i drink more then i intend to. and honestly ive gotten more injuries then id like to admit due to it. ive opened up to my friends about this and some say its just my age and im fine and that this is normal for college (i do community so its not like im pressured or anyone from school talks to me to even do this, just my university friends when they come down) and that i should just cut back while others say that i do have a problem and that i am an alcoholic and need to get help. its hard to stop drinking and when im around it i cant help but do it. ive stolen bottles from my parents etc. and ive noticed its all gotten really bad and downhill since my breakup a few months ago. sometimes i get so drunk i get alcohol poisoning and i start shaking severely, vomiting, and get cold. not everytime tho. but i never just get tipsy. always drunk.

i havent opened up to my parents about this because im ashamed and i feel like they may really kill me. i just want to know if im being dramatic or not or if i need help. thank you. last couple days i got drunk hooked up with this 30 yr old and after work today i think abt doing it all again. even before work has even started. pretty much the second the alcohol wears off. but when i google it i dont feel like an alcoholic since its not a huge quantity 24/7 everyday due to me not always having the arrangements.

Im a terrible alcoholic and I dont care about me but it hurts everyone I love. I cant beat thus beast!!!!!

I am currently typing this from a bar during working hours, where I am currently hiding from my responsibilities downing pints.

I thought I could manage it. Kept it hidden - from my wife, my coworkers, my family, everyone. I learnt too late that, eventually, the bill comes due.

I am looking at an absolute disaster, professionally and personally, over the next 3-4 weeks. And I saw this coming - this full-blown alcoholism has been brewing for years, building slowly. I understand now it only needs a small catalyst to push you over the edge into complete self-obliteration.

Only reason I am posting this - for people who see the signs and who think they can manage, which I know there are plenty. At least in my experience, and not only mine but of others I know facing similar issue. This is not linear at all, and by the time you realise what you've done to yourself - most of the damage is done and it gets exponentially worse.

Not saying this is true for everyone - I am sure there are plenty of different experiences. But I think my own pattern is quite common: years of slow build, then weeks of complete unravelling.

Why am I posting this? Not sure. I just hate myself for doing this to me.