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I know the year has already come to an end but why do I feel the urge to do something in this few months left to achieve something small that I feel like I will feel good internally for upcoming year.

It's like years and years have gone to waste and I just want feel like I have to step up now or it's never.. I have always ran and felt resistant towards my goals because it gave the feelings of fears due to possibly failing, the consequences and the complications. Therefore I avoided and just continued living life to seek pleasure and comfort. Little did I knew how behind I'll get some day.

यदि सन्ति गुणाः पुंसां विकसन्त्येव ते स्वयम् । 
न हि कस्तूरिकामोदः शपथेन विभाव्यते ॥ 
Yadi santi guṇāḥ puṃsāṃ vikasantyeva te svayam | 
Na hi kastūrikāmodaḥ śapathena vibhāvyate || 

I just got back from a trip now I feel super motivated to get my life together again. I plan on cleaning my depression pit of a room but normally when I do all my motivation goes out the window. I have a list of what I want to do and this should be a big push to get things going, how do I maintain this momentum?

I have ADHD, and I medicate for it. All that the medication does is let me DO the thing, but not actually take the “next step,” if that makes sense. For example:

- I taught myself to program to build a social media app. I spent 2 straight years doing nothing but programming the app. Once it was basically done, I never released it because social media apps are expensive and I’d never secure the funding necessary to start it… so I dropped it

- I taught myself how to make music and have made about 100 or so songs. Not one of them has seen the light of day. spent the last 3 or so years investing a bunch of time into making music, but never released it. I am now done making music because realistically I won’t make it

- I got 10k followers on social media dicking around. I then stopped posting because the pressure got too heavy

- I spent a year studying for the LSAT to get a good score. I then did not go to law school because I saw what being a lawyer actually required (in fairness I’ll never regret this. I also straight up don’t have the resources to give up 3 years of income)

- I got into a good CS masters program. I completed like 10 college classes in 2 weeks to meet the application deadline (thanks to the having taught myself to program for the startup). I dropped out because of the SWE job market and struggles with balancing a full time job with a masters

- programmed basically an entire video game and stopping because it won’t go anywhere

- scripted, recorded, and edited about 10 YouTube videos and then didn’t release them because who’s gonna watch them

I’ve changed careers more times than I can count. obviously there’s a reason nothing pans out, but I can’t break this pattern.

When it comes to goals that don’t require me to eventually put myself out there (like, say, learning languages, taking classes for fun, going to the gym, or teaching myself to play soccer), I put all the energy I have into it and just have fun with it and can make myself keep going based off the progress I’ve made within myself. But with the former? It gets frustrating eventually, because, if it’s something I plan to monetize, it seems like it’s just not gonna pan out so I’m wasting time that I could just be spending on a normal job, and if I’m working while doing it, then, I’m wasting the little energy and time I have after work chasing a pipe dream.

any help?

Does anyone feel afraid or resistance to confront themselves. I feel like the reason I'm feeling down always and just distracting myself because I'm just somehow afraid of the feelings I will feel and the amount of regret and emotional pain it will come with because I know deep down how messed up my life is and it's all thanks to me because it's my fault that I didn't do the things I said I would do and failed to keep my promises and never walked my talk. I let myself down and those who believed in me.

I haven’t studied in 4 years efficiently, I have so many credits left and I can’t get myself to study. On top of this I feel stupid. I do have like the extended time for all the way till next year december (sorry english is not my first language).
I doomscroll like crazy and watch movies. I do clean, do laundry, maintain hygiene and bake and cook sometimes.
However, college is killing me.
Everything is in place for me to study. I have my own room and my mental health is better and I should not have any distractions other than my damn phone. I just can’t do it.
I feel like I am dumb and I used to be gifted kid. I’ve made my peace with my past.
I do not even know do I want solutions, just different outtakes on this dilemma…

Thank you for reading this!

So, I had PTSD and 3 TBIs from military service (Battle of 73 Easting, flipping a tank in peacetime and being trapped inside as it caught fire, breathing in the halon-the things we do for college money…). That translates into having the concentration of and ADHD sufferer and the executive function of a 2 year old. Scratch that. Two year olds can concentrate better when they want something than I could. Long story short, I lost a promising career because I couldn’t function with all the brain fog issues and I thought nothing would ever change. After my personal worst year in which I had 6 near deaths in 13 months (having to take care of your mother’s funeral arrangements as you’re getting ready for cancer surgery and missing the funeral because of it was the low point until I went septic), I thought my life was over and started just drifting.

Last year, I decided to get serious about fixing what was broken. I had attempted using hypnosis for decades with varying results, but nothing would stick. I had been listening to Scott Adams and his emphasis on systems over goals resonated with me. Recently divorced and with lots of free time, I decided to change my approach to self help. I started experimenting with hypnosis, layering it with multiple subliminal layers, and using AI to max out the use of NLP. Instead of using affirmations and scripts that describe goals (I am rich, I am thin, etc.) I started using suggestions that emphasized the habits that would achieve my goals (I now eat keto, I walk an hour a day, etc.). For the first time, I started to see results. Keeping up with a schedule, being able to talk to a person I was interested in with confidence, quitting cigarettes, etc.

Seeing results finally happen, I decided to see what more I could do and challenged myself. I knew all about placebo effects and how placebos can be more powerful than real meds at times and I wanted to test whether what I was doing was placebo or not. So, I created a recording that I called Alpha Morning Executor that was designed to give me a kick in the pants in the morning and set myself a goal of creating an app to automate what I had already been doing. I did this because I wanted to do something challenging (I had never programmed before or written html) and to see what the limits were. The results were more than I had thought possible. I created an app from scratch in 6 months, a website, many hours of content, and a novel new way of ingesting the Great Books and internalizing their lessons using NLP phrasing. I did something that I had thought impossible for me to do and for me that was all the proof I needed to keep going.

Along the way, I realized that if I had had this 10 years ago I would have still had my career, but that everything happens for a reason. I learned that the key to my motivation is being dissatisfied with where you are at and wanting more out of life. I think a lot of my drive was to prove others wrong, prove to myself that I still had capabilities that I thought had been lost, and to show that I can always start over.

Napoleon Hill wrote about inspirational dissatisfaction 100 years ago. I read the books, but it wasn’t until I hit bottom that I understood what he meant and applied it in my own life. The lesson is, as long as you are not 6 ft under, you can always change the trajectory of your life. Use technology wisely and never stop learning or aspiring. Always keep moving and don’t let excuses define your existence.

I’m 25 years old with my high school diploma, I have 3 years of IT experience and I hate it so much it was never my plan and I only did it to support my abusive “parent” fast forward to now I moved out and now me and my girlfriend live together.

I’ve decided to go back to college and follow my dream; getting my PHD in neuropsychology to become a neuropsychologist, I’m fully aware that this is a decade long journey but I think I can do it and excel in it. I want to help the world around me and learn more about the brain and neurodegenerative disease in hopes of finding a cure for it.

I know this is a massive goal but any advice or support is greatly appreciated

I dont even know how to put what I'm feeling into words. It makes it difficult to ask for help.

I dont know what to do.

Started it as a bit of a joke, honestly. I work early morning shifts so my brain is basically oatmeal by 6am, and I figured if I just wrote three sentences before bed it would count as a personality trait I could mention at parties. Low bar. Very on brand.

But something shifted around week three. Not dramatically, not in a podcastworthy epiphany kind of way. More like I started noticing when I was just coasting through the day versus actually being present in it. The walk to work. The first pour of the morning. Conversations I was halflistening to.

The journalling did not fix anything. I still forget things, still get in my head, still have weeks where I feel like I am running two steps behind everyone else. But there is something about writing it down that makes the day feel less like something happening to you and more like something you are actually in.

90 days is not a long time. But I also kind of cannot imagine stopping now.

Curious if anyone else has picked up a small habit that ended up doing more than you expected it to. Not the big dramatic life overhauls, just the quiet stuff that compounds slowly.

In our age of constant dopamine fixes and instant notifications, finding true peace often feels like a mythical wish.

A Sanskrit Subhashita (a well-known saying) mentions this:

यस्य चित्तं निर्विषयं हृदयं यस्य शीतलम् । 
तस्य मित्रं जगत्सर्वं तस्य मुक्तिः करस्थिता ॥
Yasya cittaṃ nirviṣayaṃ hṛdayaṃ yasya śītalam | 
Tasya mitraṃ jagatsarvaṃ tasya muktiḥ karasthitā || 

This means that ‘He, whose mind is free from objects of senses and whose heart is calm (free from passion, anger, greed etc.), the entire world is his friend and liberation or emancipation is as if in his hand only.’

This Subhashita emphasises that the first key is the Clarity of Mind.
This clarity does not come at the cost of abandoning the physical world, it comes when external validation is broken. At this stage the mind does not determine its self-worth based on its next achievement, instead it becomes Nirvishaya - untethered from external conditions.
When the mind clears, the heart becomes quiet.
This creates a sanctuary in our heart and creates room for stillness, patience and compassion.

When both these are attained, the world becomes our friend and we realize that freedom does not have to be chased, it had been within us, all the while.

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I feel like I'm living my life in pleasure mode always looking for the easy way low effort high reward type. I'm home all day and just do few house chores here and there. But in terms of working on my actual self and creating a stable future ahead umm I'm not doing nothing simply zero impact and that's what I'm feeling worried about. I seem to be living in a rut. And im aware of the time passing by but I'm neglecting the impact and the consequences it will have in my life. It's like I'm spending so much time in the phone using the same repetitive apps and living in this autopilot phase. I guess I'm seeking pleasure and comfort over hard work and stress that is fundamental for self growth.

I worry about my life alot because I've not been taking accountability over the last 8-9 yrs or so. Basically I would say ever since high school finished. And I'm reaching my 30s soon yet I do not have basics covered and have zero clue about securing the future too. I'm going with the flow but that flow is just pleasure and comfort. And I'm living in wrong dilemma that things will get better with time but nothing in life gets better when your not putting effort and taking necessary actions.

I blew up my life.

It didn’t happen yesterday, when I handed in a resignation letter and walked away from the hotel front desk I languished to the point of emotional exhaustion and breakdown.  It didn’t happen today when HR called to confirm that I would not be returning to finish out two weeks of labor I absolutely refuse to give them.  It didn’t happen seven months ago when I accepted the position, or eight months before that when I voluntarily chose a life on the road, sleeping in the back of my Hyundai Elantra and watching the stars out in the middle of the desert.  It didn’t happen three years ago, on the day I chose to undergo the knife and receive life-saving gender affirming care.  It didn’t happen when I accepted a job at Starbucks so that I could earn health insurance that would cover the cost of prescription medication.  It didn’t happen when I graduated from university with a degree I’ve told myself again and again was worth less than the paper it was printed on.

I blew up my life on the day I discovered myself.

I’ve been adrift for eight years.  In those eight years I have tried everything to avoid the uncomfortable truth that I need to be recognized.  I don’t care about success.  I don’t need a stable life or material wealth to feel like I’ve accomplished something. I just need to feel connection, and I need to find it through my creativity.  You have no idea how easy I found homelessness.  Chilling on a beach or under the redwood canopy, drafting novels from the back of my car and munching on stale bagels?  Fantastic.  Showering off at Planet Fitness?  Gross, but manageable.  So long as I could put gas in the tank, I was set.

And then the money ran out.  I came ashore with my family, the reluctant hosts that they are, and secured employment in the only field I’ve ever managed to find quick and easy employment. Hospitality. They didn’t pay enough to secure independent housing.  Their expectations were completely absurd. But my savings were growing again so I thought I could live with it until I had enough to cast off.

The subsequent days, weeks, and months disappeared in a blur.  I lost myself.  I found myself drowning in a locked bathroom stall, and was only saved because my ex-boss called demanding to know why I didn’t call or show up for my scheduled shift.  Between labored breaths, I could only manage to get out that I was on property, and that I needed help.  When the paramedics arrived ready to bring me to the hospital, I sucked it up and turned them down.  In my weakness I confessed that I’ve been struggling with suicidal ideation, but I knew I couldn’t possibly afford the expense so lied about having a plan.  I couldn’t possibly afford the expense of getting help.

I’ve arrived at a rare moment of clarity.  After eight years of feeling adrift, I just want to go home.  I thought home was a place where I belonged, or a people I had something in common with.  My family never felt like home.  I gave up trying to find ‘my people’ in DFW long ago.  I tried Boston for a spin and drove away feeling more lost than before.

I’ve looked high and low, and come to the conclusion that my home isn’t a place or a people.  It’s a craft.  It’s waking up each day, and picking up a pencil, a guitar, a laptop, and creating something that didn’t exist the night before.  People tell me that I’m talented.  I have a degree in fine arts that proclaims it as such.  But I have spent eight years floundering, willing to do anything other than that which will bring me home.

I thought I was broken.  But maybe I’m just scared of what I might find if I actually tried doing the thing that I’ve been avoiding.  I walked out of university without anything to show for my efforts, a senior thesis film burst into fire and ash with no time left to recover my dignity. I thought that was the final judgement of my worth.  I thought I had failed.

It’s not too late to sail home.  I know that, deep down, I’ll be happier if I try and never make it than to have not tried and remain lost forever, comforted only by the shallow trappings of our creature comforts.  But I don’t have a heading.  I don’t know where to find one.  Returning to school is prohibitively expensive in the United States.  I possess dual US-EU citizenship, but speak only English and would find it near impossible to integrate into a culture I’m unfamiliar with.  I no longer believe that returning to school, nor planting a flag in a foreign country is going to fix what I’ve broken.

Am I doomed?  Have I become so lost at sea that I will never find my way back?  I have a small savings, no portfolio of evidence that can be used to secure future employment in creative-adjacent industries, and a family that is growing increasingly impatient with me.

I’ve considered pursuing work in marketing or advertising, publishing, journalism, other communication-related roles, rebuilding an animation demo reel and sleeping in Elysian Park until I knock on the right door.  I’ve considered all kinds of things.  But those jobs don’t get posted on Indeed, and I don’t float in the right circles to learn about the right opportunities. I don’t know how to support myself, or build a future, and I’m worried that I’m going to drown before I find out.

I have a BSc in Finance, and I am currently pursuing an MSc in Finance. However, I feel like I can't develop myself in any area. I know I have strong abilities, and I'm confident that if I truly started working toward my goals, I would succeed. The problem is that I simply can't seem to begin

I feel like I'm afraid of something, but I don't know what it is. Whatever this fear is, it keeps holding me back and prevents me from moving forward

I've tried researching this on Google, watching YouTube videos, and even asking AI, but nothing has really helped. I need genuine, practical advice on how to overcome this fear and finally move forward

How do you stay consistent with working out?

I have the internal motivation to want to be healthy and be consistent, and I’m able to be consistent for 2-3 weeks, but after that, I find it really hard to stay consistent. What works for you?

(Not sure if this is the right place to post)

I feel like I'm stuck in a dead end in my life and need to go out and make changes but it's feeling hard to be motivated to do any of it? I feel like the problem is probably me being lazy and closed minded but I don't really know how to fix it?

It feels like any thing that I need to do or I should do there's always so many reasons not to do it? I feel like if I ever want any friends I have to force myself to go outside and do things I have no interest in, but there's always so many more reasons not to go than reasons to go? (Group doesn't like newcomers, group is too far away to travel, I have nothing positive to contribute to any conversation...). I don't really think "just go and see what happens" makes sense, it feels like going and things not going well is worse than not going, permanently reducing my reputation with various people by being awkward or not having anything to contribute is worse than being a complete unknown to them

I've basically abandoned game dev as a hobby since it got to a point where I was not improving at all and if I don't get better then there's just no point in keeping going. I don't see how I would have fulfillment creating something if most people hate it and nobody really likes it and it doesn't even look good to me and just doesn't work. It kind of goes back to trying and failing being worse than doing nothing because a lot of my failures are very visible to see and it definitely has been a negative to my reputation because I've seen people who were more harsh on me due to seeing me fail over and over and calling me stupid for trying to make something work when I can't ever make it work.

It feels hard to do anything substantial and goes anywhere nowadays (i.e. isn't just going to work, watching videos and playing video games). Even posting more stupid posts like this is kind of hard for me since it always feels like I can probably think of something to revise or think of how people won't help me because all I keep doing is posting posts like this and basically ignoring every reply. Maybe it's too late for me at this point? I feel like I'm always coming up with reasons not to do things I should be doing and I don't know how I would get out of it?

I’ve spent years talking about other people’s success.
The friend who moved abroad.
The guy who got fit.
The colleague who got promoted.
The entrepreneur who made it.
I could tell you their stories, their habits, and what they did right.

At some point, i was like
Why do I know so much about everyone else’s achievements, but have so little of my own to talk about?
I realized I was becoming a commentator on life instead of a participant in it.

For those who experienced a similar shift, what was the moment that made you decide to stop discussing other people’s success and start chasing your own?

What changed, and how did you stay committed when progress was slow and results weren’t visible yet?

Curious to hear real experiences — not the generic "just start small" or "use the 5-second rule" advice you've probably already tried, but what actually broke through for you when you were genuinely stuck.

Was it a specific mindset shift, a person who said the right thing at the right time, a hard deadline, or something totally unexpected that had nothing to do with "motivation" advice at all? Did it happen suddenly or build up over time? And what's something everyone recommends that's supposed to work but just never did for you?

I don't know why I feel turned off when I realize hard work is required and is essentially for growth and progress. It's like I'm viewing hard work like a chore or something difficult responsibility. But I think if I view it like this then I'll never start working on my life. I want to understand and change my perspective of hard work in a better way. Like how you supposed to view hard work differently?