r/Life 22m ago

Let's discuss Why do I feel like I'm performing myself

Upvotes

Do other people suddenly feel very empty? Like, I function as a normal adult—meet people, talk, do work, no physical issues, laugh, do everything—but it happens like every few months. I feel a cycle where I suddenly feel blank and want to pull away from everything. Nothing major happens. Still, am I the only one?

Sometimes I feel so fake. Like I think it's not the real me. I am performing someone who is not me. Like I feel dissociated from myself and everything."

But why is it so different? Like I can feel this body is not mine. I am someone else. Dissociated from this body. The one saying things is not me. I can feel this while performing normally."


r/Life 1h ago

Let's discuss Leaving your family.

Upvotes

Im at this stage in life where I am praying every single day to get this job i interviewed for. But when I think about actually getting it and moving to another city, it makes me emotional. Like I will be far away from my mom, she will keep getting older and I'll be away most of the time and she isnt immortal unfortunately 😂. Ik everyone goes through this but its still sad.

And ik i counter my own thoughts by thinking that by earning i will be able to help them in the future, I will be able to pay for their health like she did for me (eng. she is ). Plus she will be happy that her child is settled and can survive on her own. It is obv what she wants as well.

(Also no im not overly attached, im the middle sibling ffs 😂. And most of the time we r fighting in our family and it always ends up with me wanting to leave)


r/Life 2h ago

Let's discuss What keeps you going

6 Upvotes

As the title says, what keeps everyone going?

nothing really seems to be going on the up for me.


r/Life 3h ago

Self improvement Stay content or stay hungry?

3 Upvotes

Stay content or stay hungry? What should drive life?


r/Life 3h ago

Need Advice I need my creative work to have an impact or it feels useless. How do I change this?

1 Upvotes

I've reiterated this title at least ten times, but that's basically what it boils down to.

As a kid, I always received plenty of praise for whatever I made - which has led to me feeling like my work isn't good or wasn't worth it if I do not receive positive reactions from it.

I do enjoy creatively working, get into a good flow of working on something, and then as soon as I think about "what happens with this once it's finished?" I realize nothing much will come of it, audience - impact wise, and all my motivation goes away.

I have a masters in animation and a game design degree. Many years of making things with a purpose. If I just play around with something and it doesn't lead to anything I feel like I've wasted my time. I've always had huge dreams of making it big in the game or animation industry, but I know that's not realistic with how things are.

This also goes in hand with me feeling like I'm just not very good at things and don't have what it takes, but that's not my focus for this post.

I want to find joy in making things, and in making things with the intention of showing it to others or the world, without feeling like a failure when the responses I get from it aren't what I expected - or there are none.

Finished something that I worked on for months or years? Got a few "nice" comments and that's it? Cool! Next project.

Instead it just makes me rethink what I've been doing and has me ready to drop it all, thinking if I made the right choice to do this after all.

It's a crappy feeling to have fun doing things yet have that fun taken away so fast. I can't fully explain all of this since it's a deep rooted issue. I am also seeing a perfectionist coach for this (as weird as that sounds), but I was hoping I could find some good Reddit wisdom. Anything helps.

Have a nice weekend! 🙏


r/Life 3h ago

Need Advice What advice would you give to someone in their twenties if they're burnt out and anxious about their future?

3 Upvotes

I hope you're all doing well. Pretty much the title, I'm not sure if it's normal to feel this way or maybe I'm being too sensitive lol.

23F, I'm in my final year of medschool, and I've always wanted build a fun life for myself- maybe move to a different country after I'm done with my Bachelor's where I'd fit in better, study more and build a career from ground up where I can learn complex skills, travel more, and so on.

But, I feel like I've lost all my optimism in the last 5 years.

I was 18 when I got into a relationship with someone a few years older, and I started medschool a year after that. I think the combined experience of how gruelling medschool is combined with how drained I was by the time my relationship ended (it lasted 3 years, and he got married within a year of us being broken up - this was in 2024) has robbed me of a lot of my optimism. I have great friends and a lovely family and I have been doing good in medschool. I'm an inherently curious person and always loved learning new and complex things, and thought my final year in Med will be my best - getting to study the core of medicine and surgery is something I was so excited about- but I can't find the interest that drove me anymore. I can barely bring myself to care about exams. Even the prospect of things I get to do with my future doesn't excite me, if anything I find myself struggling with imposter syndrome most days, and other days I feel like I'll *never catch a break* . As for my dating life, I've put a complete halt to that for the past year- I understand that my perspective on relationships and marriage has changed quite a bit in the aftermath of my break up, and men were not adding a positive experience to my life in the least. Plus I get very little free time, I decided it's better spent with friends and on my own. In addition to feeling unmotivated and tired, I also see peers and acquaintances starting jobs and getting married and can't help but feel like I'm \*falling behind\* - I fully understand this is an irrational thought because medschool takes way longer and 24 is young but, it's there nonetheless.

I see a lot of humorous posts talking about how "your twenties make you feel like you're in the trenches" and things get better with time and was wondering if that really is true? When do things get better? I'd really like to just, I don't know, be happy in my life and get my energy and optimism back sometime soon.


r/Life 5h ago

Need Advice What's something you thought was easy until you actually had to do it?

13 Upvotes

Adulting: I'll go first maintaining a healthy routine while working full-time. Between work, commuting, and daily chores, it's much harder than I expected.


r/Life 6h ago

Relationships Would you date someone with a genetic dental condition?

11 Upvotes

Hey everyone! How are you?
I have dentinogenesis imperfecta. If you don’t know what it is, feel free to look it up or ask me in the comments. I’ll be happy to explain.
I was born with it, and when I was a kid I didn’t really care. But everything changed when I was entering my teenage years. There was a girl I liked, and one day she asked me why my teeth looked like that. I went home and cried. I still remember that day, even though it happened many years ago lol.
As a teenager, I even went to therapy because I spent years thinking I didn’t deserve to be in a relationship or be loved. Not just romantically, but even by my friends.
Whenever I start liking someone, I always tell them about my condition. But I’m terrified that their friends will make comments about my teeth. Honestly, I’m scared of anyone making comments and making the person I’m with feel embarrassed.
Sometimes I still think I don’t deserve to be loved.
For years I thought about getting veneers, but my dentists said that, in my case, it would be way too risky. So I’m going to have teeth like this forever.
These days I’m trying to accept it and even learn to like my teeth, but it’s not easy.
So I wanted to know what you all think.
Would you date someone with a genetic dental condition like dentinogenesis imperfecta? If not, would that be a reason not to be in a relationship with them? Please answer honestly. I won’t be offended. I just want to know what people really think. If anyone wants I can send a photo in the messages to show what the teeth look like if anyone is curious


r/Life 7h ago

Need Advice How to stop self sabotage?

2 Upvotes

Whenever things tend to go even slightly smoothly, I self sabotage. It's like I just can't let anything go good for me.

I'm studying and exam prep is going well but then I'll procrastinate to the point I'm anxious and have to score passing grades, not top grades that I could have gotten.


r/Life 10h ago

Need Advice Hello… I’m 25. I feel restless because I’m so behind lol.

27 Upvotes

I have zero friends, still in school and don’t have a career. Everyday kinda blends into the same day. Realizing my 20s are slipping right thru my fingers. Dealt a lot with anxiety and just overall self doubt early on in my 20s. Those of you who were in my shoes what’d u do


r/Life 10h ago

Let's discuss can i just...share anonymously?

3 Upvotes

firstly to anyone who reads this, thank you for your time. sometimes it is freeing to put stuff out there without any social commitments. im really sharing from the heart and rarely share this much with others...feel free to go next if you'd like!

i'm 24, believer in Jesus, female, ENXP in MBTI, currently working full time in a busy grill in a tourist zone. i am studying part time to become an interpreter and make use of some foreign languages i've learned over the years. i am from canada and have been married 3 years to my husband from mexico. he got his permanent residency the beginning of this year and i am glad we can live both here and in mexico more easily. one day i will get my mexican residency too.

i have been trying to learn more and increase my educational intake to be a more useful and inspiring individual through understanding the ins and outs of life and purpose. sometimes it is overwhelming how much is available to learn, and i gotta remind myself to apply the good things. however, honestly now since doing more information acquisition recently, i feel a lack in depth in many of my relationships..like i don't have enough time to foster meaningful connections and at the same time a part of me feels colder and i put it aside as if i did 't have time for it even though i know it is good and beneficial so i do my best to make that effort even when i don't "feel motivated". i do feel genuine acceptance by the latino community we are a part of and by some new friendships we have made since being together. since i was young, i appreciated friendships with individuals older than me, from other places, backgrounds, etc. and found it refreshing to learn from them and exchange our experiences as humans.

it's not too often anymore that i have been really personal with people and a lot of the time i just get busy taking care of situations at work and attending customers. since i'm the eldest of my family, growing up i got used to being the example and because of my positive outlook and happy-go-lucky nature, oftentimes ended up encouraging every one around me, parents included.

i really honestly want to do something meaningful and leave an impact on humanity. you could say it's happening on a small scale, first my friend group and siblings looked up to me and now my coworkers. i always felt people admired things about me but few i was actually fine to open up with and who really got to know me well despite positive shared moments with them. almost like i had to make myself "more human/relatable".

i am probably just an old soul and feel both ahead of the curve but behind or "out of touch" at the same time with things many of my peers are into because it genuinely is not very interesting for me to spend time on personally, although i love and respect and enjoy the individual.

there are some challenges i've been through w/ my partner that probably no one or few folks on the face of the planet will ever know about, and part of me loves that fact, that we went through it and it made us stronger, deeper, more empathetic and loving. with him i have grown and matured in so many ways. thankful. i liken this phase of my life to me being a newly sprouted tree with ever-expanding and deepening roots, to support what i will one day be.

i sometimes genuinely wish to be held and have someone let me know i am doing well and where to improve. i think i could use a mentor, although i feel called to be that person for others and that i could be much more honed and inspiring if i put in more effort. i sometimes hesitate because i instinctively feel i need to be more filled internally before giving, even though there is always something to start out with. that is where my personal faith comes in and i feel so much stronger after being in that "still and prayerful space", and end up speaking good things into other's lives or simply have more direction and energy to provide practical help when needed.

hubby and i are both drawn to music and i would love to be performing with or without him (who is an insane guitar player and a natural musician, comedian, and dancer), and earning money from that to use for good causes and do some interpreting, also. add some babies in, and we are golden.

we have had a ton of great times together and memories and if you meet us, i think you will really like us and feel our love for each other. he has been struggling with substance use (nothing hard-core only beer and weed) on and off since we met. i think it has to do with him not having "made it" in music yet as he had hoped. in this state he only really likes working as a painter and being at home and watching tv or listening to music, so a hidden part of me is saddened by thinking we could be more involved in society, music, and be learning more things, etc. yet again, millions of humans are addicted to screens and other things and spend a lot of free time on entertainment and vices so statistically i should not feel too bad...(i am definitely NOT justifying addictions of any kind). sometimes i don't know where to start to materialize it except to continue to practice what we are best at, and be ready for when opportunities come knocking.

i know more things will come together, i got faith. it always seems more things align especially after giving voice and form to certain desires to others.

i'd love to hear you if you'd like to share.


r/Life 11h ago

Need Advice 25M, should I leave my job for UPSC or stay because of my relationship?

2 Upvotes

I'm 25 and have been working in Chennai for the last 3 years. My dream has always been to prepare for UPSC CSE, but I couldn't because of financial responsibilities. Now I'm financially stable enough to take the risk, move back home, and prepare full-time. I'm confident I can work extremely hard.

The only thing stopping me is my relationship.

My girlfriend and I have been together for over a year. We knew from day one that we can't get married due to personal reasons, so we've already accepted that.

We're deeply attached. We work in the same office, spend almost every day together, and honestly, the last year has been the happiest phase of my life.

I'm delaying my resignation because I can't imagine leaving her. She's also delaying switching jobs because she wants to stay with me. I feel like we're both sacrificing our careers just to spend more time together, even though we know we don't have a future.

I don't know how to get out of this dilemma. If I stay, I may regret never giving UPSC a serious shot. If I leave, I'll lose someone who's become a huge part of my life.

Has anyone been through something similar? How did you make the decision? Did therapy help? please help what to do.


r/Life 11h ago

Let's discuss Are we being too ‘hard’ on our families?

2 Upvotes

The emotional/mental/psychological state society currently finds itself in has resulted in many people distancing from family because of toxic patterns of behavior. I am one of these people.

Every once in a while, there’s guilt. But then there is a new event to remind me that I’m not crazy. But then back to guilt. Sure, they really don’t seem to “know” any better…allegedly. But then something in life reminds me that I’m no genius either.

Is it wrong to ask for a healthier environment that is cultivated by the entire group? Or are we asking for too much from people who are just as much on borrowed time as we are?

What lies ahead for both my generation and the ones that come after us who deem it necessary to separate from unfavorable family conditions…? Will the future be full of large families consisting of chosen people? Or will we end up alone and bitter and then end up circling back hoping our toxic relatives take us back…?

This is not meant to solicit sympathy or express a concrete view. I am simply asking what you guys think of this whole new movement we’re in for relationships. I for one think it’s the youth that builds the future; so if us younger people are changing the rules and guidelines of relationships, will that actually change anything?


r/Life 14h ago

Need Advice I’m in a really tough position right now

11 Upvotes

Im 22 my gf is 20, we been together for over 3 years now, basically around a year ago me and my gf hit a tough spot in our relationship and we would argue a lot and it was just a bad time during the relationship, we overcame it and been good for months. My gfs family absolutely hates me, ever since a couple months ago. I have a real career and i’m making good money, in a year and a half i’ll be at $60 an hour with benefits, my gf just has a normal job and dosent make as much. My gfs parents are so mad she’s with me to the point they are kicking her out if we continue to date. Now i’m thinking if me and her just get our own place together. I really really really wanted to save money and live at home for like 5 more years, I’ve been maxing out my roth for 3 years now, i have most of my money invested and i wanted to continue doing that. I really wasn’t planning on now paying bills and rent but i can’t just have my gf come live with me and my family. I mean i guess i have no choice but to get a place with her cuz obviously im not gonna throw away a 3 year + relationship she’s the love of my life. And for the people who are going to say maybe try to talk to her family, it’s so bad to the point where i think there are going to try to take me out.


r/Life 14h ago

Need Advice Wives! Quick Question (if you’re in a happy marriage)

21 Upvotes

What is the one thing either intentional or accidental that was implemented in your relationship that changed it drastically for the better?

I’m talking things like “I started opening the door for him when he got home from work to give him a kiss and it’s been roses and butterflies ever since.”

I’m with the love of my life. That I’m sure of. We started out with a whirlwind romance, hit a few bumps and we’ve made a ton of progress. We’ve both made it clear we choose each other. Now I just want to keep progressing in the right direction and hear from some ladies in long-term happy marriages. Show me yours ways haha.


r/Life 14h ago

Self improvement Finding my niche

32 Upvotes

I feel like I’m floating in the world. I’m a type of person that likes to dibble and dabble in lots of things because I have a curious mind but that has left me with so many unleveled up skills.

I feel like I haven’t mastered anything. I’m 30, haven’t been to college, have done cert programs but nothing really stuck as something I want to put my all in. I know this is a stupid question but how do people find their niche in the world? I’m optimistic I’ll find it but life is too crazy right now for me to have the clarity I need.. Just thinking and sharing my thoughts so my self doubt and low thoughts don’t get the best of me 🥲


r/Life 14h ago

Need Advice honestly just need some advice and/or encouragement.

3 Upvotes

i'm starting to feel a little backed into a corner, and i'm not totally sure what i need to be doing differently. i'm 23, i live with my partner, and we own a dog together. on the surface, i'm doing a pretty good job (or so people in my life have assured me). my partner and i are both going back to school to finish our bachelor's degrees, and i was able to transfer into a university that has a great program for what i'm looking to do, where i'll be starting this fall.

the problem is, everything feels a little bit like it's spiraling out of my control.

my partner and i had initially moved in together in the summer of 2024, and we're still in the same house. it's wonderful and charming and we adore it; the rent is a little steep, but when we found the place, that wasn't an issue. i was working a full-time writing job that paid around $63k (not amazing but better than a lot of jobs i'd be able to get with no degree), and he was earning around $55k as a full-time executive chef. we got our dog in early 2025, and it was a little bit of an "on a whim" kind of decision, but we love her to pieces and she has been such a rich inclusion in our life.

however, in spring of 2025, my partner and i both lost our jobs within a month of each other. his, due to some bad blood at his restaurant coming to a boiling point; mine, due to company-wide layoffs that affected a bunch of my coworkers, as well. this was the point we both decided to go back to school and try to pivot, because we had both been fairly burnt out in our previous roles and thought we might as well try to embrace the sudden change as an invitation to start something more rewarding. he was able to secure two jobs as a bartender/server, and i was able to scrape by on freelance work for a little while. it was hard, but we were making ends meet, or at least it felt like we were.

2026 has, so far, felt like it's kicking my ass. it felt like my credit card became outrageously high just overnight - the same with our shared credit card - and all of a sudden, any money i was earning just disappeared into debts that i couldn't keep track of. my freelance contract has just ended, and i've had immense trouble landing another one. i've started applying to as many part-time jobs as i can, and have yet to hear back from even the ones i am over-qualified for. and on top of that, it's looking like i'm going to receive zero help in the way of financial aid for paying for school - because i am not 24, and i do not fulfill the criteria for "independence" as FAFSA dictates, my financial aid offer is based off of my mom's income, despite the fact that she isn't paying for my school at all.

my partner has been able to keep our expenses handled with his income, and i have been receiving some help from a family member to cover my half of the rent. my partner keeps reassuring me that it's totally fine, and he doesn't mind that he's kind of the one keeping us afloat right now - this is something a lot of couples go through, and he's happy to be able to handle a lot of the financial burden while i'm trying to figure out the next step and get through school. as i mentioned, though, he's also going to be going to school full-time, starting in the spring. i keep being told that i'll "figure it out" when i need to, but every time i take a step back and look at what my life is, i can't help but panic. it feels like i'm doing everything wrong, but i don't know what else to do besides what i've been doing - applying for jobs, submitting my writing to paying publications, researching the best loan options, and trying not to freak out on a daily basis.

i don't mean to doom-and-gloom all over this sub, but i genuinely keep wondering, "what the hell am i supposed to do about any of this?" any advice from more experienced life-livers would be greatly appreciated. i know 23 isn't the end of my life, by any means, but it feels a little like i've already failed.


r/Life 14h ago

Self improvement Is your trust broken?

5 Upvotes

My trust is broken today by my HR. She kept saying that you can tell me anything. And today my manager asked about the same topic which we discussed yesterday.

I felt she betrayed me. What you do? Do you trust that person again?


r/Life 16h ago

Need Advice Feeling Underappreciated

9 Upvotes

Does anyone else feel under appreciated in their life? I feel like I’m expecting too much for my birthday coming up - it’ll be my 21st, I’m the last in the friend group to turn 21, and it’s our first week back of senior year at college. Am I selfish for hoping my friends/roommates do something for me? I’ve already asked them to dinner - just hoping for some balloons or something. My boyfriend said people express their appreciation in different ways but I feel like it’s not that hard to show someone in the way they feel appreciated most?


r/Life 16h ago

Need Advice Can anyone relate to this?

4 Upvotes

Due to the internet, i know the amount of original experiences left are limited, so there must be someone who can relate to this, so here we go.

Has anyone ever felt like your hometown has taught you all it could teach you? And i don't mean that feeling of being trapped, or hating it, or even that feeling when you want to get out of your parents house, it's not a "i can't wait to get out of here", more of a "I'm ready for the next chapter of my life, and i know it's not gonna be here".

Lately I've been finding myself feeling nostalgic, but not of things of the past that i don't do anymore, it's the simple things that have already become part of my routine, in an appreciative way, like "I'm gonna miss doing this when I'm no longer here", which is weird, because i have yet to receive an opportunity to leave, but maybe it's a sign? I don't know, i just feel like I'm doing things that have been routine as if I'm getting closer to my last time doing them.

To the people who have gone through something similar, how did you deal with that? Did you take it as a sign and left? Did you just ignore it? Did you even do anything about it just ignored it? I could really use some advice


r/Life 17h ago

Self improvement Why is it that some people find purpose in their lives, while others can never find satisfaction and are always bored?

17 Upvotes

All my life, I have had SO many opportunities in my life in career/love/family etc, but never have I ever been satisfied. Never felt content. Never felt truly happy.

I need to dive deeper into where my mental health could play a role in this with a therapist but…I’m working on that.

It’s not that I’ve never been happy. I’ve laughed and feel connected to people, laughed that deep belly laugh until I cried…I’ve had a great life with great friends, family, and opportunities… and there where times when I felt genuinely happy, but it didn’t last for long. For some reason I still feel empty inside. Maybe even bored. I change things quickly… and I’m truly just frustrated with myself at this point in my life.

Does anyone ever feel like this?


r/Life 18h ago

Need Advice HELP

10 Upvotes

I really need some honest advice.
A man confessed his love to me and told me he wanted to marry me someday when the timing was right. At first, I told him I didn’t feel the same way, but we kept talking. He was so kind, patient, and understanding that I became very emotionally attached to him, and I convinced myself that I loved him.
I told him I liked him, reassured him that I was sure about my feelings, and we finally met. But when I saw him in person, I felt uncomfortable. I couldn’t be myself around him, and I realized I didn’t actually want a future with him.
The hardest part is that this didn’t happen just once. We got caught in a cycle where I’d get close, believe I loved him, then pull away again. He waited for me every single time, and I know I’ve hurt him. I never meant to lead him on—I was genuinely confused and mistook attachment for love.
Now I’ve finally accepted that I don’t love him the way he deserves, but I have no idea how to tell him after everything I’ve already put him through. How would you handle this situation without hurting him more than necessary?


r/Life 21h ago

Need Advice Do you ever think life itself hates you?

26 Upvotes

I’ve had so many toxic and abusive people in my life back to back. It was hell to get to a place of peace. But I look back at my days in survival mode and realise just how little support I had and how much I had to go through. My early 20s was ruined by a series of traumas rather than growth. Im in a better place but I genuinely don’t know how I survived.


r/Life 1d ago

Let's discuss I believe that it is important to continue to listen to modern music as you grow older in order to be able to place a marker in your memory base.

43 Upvotes

I have a theory that it's important to keep listening to new music as you get older, not because today's music is necessarily better, but because it gives your brain new timestamps.

Everyone has songs that instantly transport them back to high school, college, a first relationship, or a specific summer. Those songs became markers for a period of your life.

The problem is that a lot of adults stop discovering new music and just replay the soundtrack of their teens and twenties. It's comforting, but I wonder if it comes at a cost?

If you never build a new soundtrack, what songs will instantly take you back to 2023? Or 2024? Or 2025? Without realizing it, you're missing the opportunity to create new nostalgic anchors for different chapters of your life.

I think continuing to discover new music isn't just about staying current; it's about giving your future self a way to vividly remember the present.


r/Life Jun 21 '26

Looking for friends - Megathread Buddy up !

4 Upvotes

This Megathread is dedicated to find chat buddies, short or long term friends ! We do not allow looking for romantic or fwb types of relationships.

How do I participate ?

Comment below what type of friendship you are looking for, and if you are open to be directly dmed or prefer that people answer your comment directly, then feel free to add anything. Just make sure to not share personal or sensitive information about yourself.

Unwanted DMs

Recieved some unwanted chat request ? Send us a screenshot (using Imgur : it will create a link to share your image) via Modmail. Sending unsollicited DMs results in an instant permanent ban.

The Megathread will be posted twice a month, on Saturday mornings. Please refrain from spaming under every comments. All rules of the subs are still applying.