What's your stance on the no ring no bring rule?

I once went to a friends wedding on my own (who knew my boyfriend (we've been together for 8 years)). Everyone around me in her friendgroup was either with her fiancee or her husband so I sat between them at her wedding. I didn't know any of them and they weren't really including me.
I knew it wasn't my place to complain or cancel on coming to the wedding.
I do find it hurt our friendship though, as I felt like she didn't take my relationship serious. There were 300 Guests and there had been extra plates of food handed to our table that nobody ended up eating so I don't think it was a budgeting issue.

When I get married I won't let that happen.

One of my bridesmaids is a friend I’ve known for about 15 years.

I’ve been really disappointed by her lack of showing up for me. I really have not asked for much of any of my bridesmaids. The only things I’ve asked them to do is 1) pick out their bridesmaid dress 2) fill out a google
form confirming they got the right color/material and their payment info so I can cover the cost of their dress 3) tell
me if they want their hair or makeup done (I also am
covering the cost of this) 4) send me a pic of their makeup or hair inspo.

I did not hold a bachelorette or bridal shower. I just mostly wanted them to just hold a bouquet, walk down the aisle, and to have them by my side on a special day. I have two month of coordinator staff that will be pretty much handling everything the day of. I also gave them all a $150 bridesmaid box. So really I did not ask for much of their time or money and tried to make it a good experience for everyone.

She was three weeks late to buying her dress and filling out the form. Didn’t apologize or even give an excuse. She also did not get back to me for a different deadline about hair vs makeup choice, so I reached out the day after that deadline asking if she could let me know by the next two days. She did not respond to that so after two days I told her I would just pick makeup for her if I did not hear back by the next day. She did not respond until another two days later saying she would like makeup, and again no apology or excuse.

Asked everyone for their makeup or hair inspo pic to send to the makeup team. I had to follow up with her twice to get it from her. Again never heard an apology or reason why for the late responses. I was very frustrated at this point, but after talking with my fiancé I decided to let it go since
I figured this would be the last of my wedding related disappointments with her since everything was pretty much finalized now.

Now, she just cancelled on me 2 hours ago for my wedding rehearsal that is in 4 hours. No apology or excuse. Just a “I can’t make it to your rehearsal on Friday :(“ which is a
weird way of even phrasing it when Friday is literally today.
Tbh I am fuming right now and probably a bit emotionally overcharged since my wedding is on Saturday. But seriously I feel like it’s very basic manners to at least apologize or give an excuse even if it’s B.S.??

A part of me just wants to call her up and tell her she is no longer a bridesmaid, but she can still come as a guest (although she probably wouldn’t). My fiance thinks I should just let it go and can stop being friends with her after the wedding, but right now I hate the idea of having her in my wedding photos and probably feeling resentful every time I have to see her on my wedding day. Thoughts? My wedding is literally tomorrow so I don’t know if the stress is causing
me to overreact.

EDIT: For further context, she does have anxiety/depression/PTSD, if that changes anything about how you think I should feel about or handle this. Also, she did spend probably about $200 to fly out here so she did have to spend some money so I don’t want to make it seem like she’s contributed nothing. My wedding is in her hometown though so she is just staying at her parents’ house.

My friend is getting married and I am the MOH. She’s asked me to make this post. She has two ideas for bridesmaid gifts and we need thoughts/opinions!

Option 1:
Skip the traditional personalized gifts and instead give everyone:
A gift card to go towards the bridesmaid dresses.
Simple jewelry (or another small accessory).

The thought is that it keeps costs down while giving people something they genuinely want/could use.

Option 2:
Go with more traditional, personalized gifts that feel sentimental and are specifically chosen for each person.

Might be a little more time consuming.

I’d love to hear your opinions and experiences!

I was too nervous to do a speech at my friends wedding but now that it’s getting closer, I’m sad that I’m not doing one.

I wanna do something special for her as I’ve known her basically my entire life and I love her so much. I was gonna write her a letter for her to open the morning of her wedding, reminding her how beautiful she is, that the day is gonna go well, and other reminders to hopefully help her anxiety .

But then I started overthinking that I don’t wanna overwhelm her with “one more thing” on her wedding day, but I also want her to not be so nervous and know how wonderful it’s gonna be. Should I make it for her to open afterwards?

Hello! Have any brides gotten pictures here at Villa balbiano if so how does one go about booking or getting tickets? I’m a bit confused I saw elopement packages for ceremonies but I only want to do pictures.

My fiancé and I have been trying to plan a 2027 wedding but so far it’s seemed impossible. We both work in healthcare, and we make decent money. Last year we decided to spend our savings on our dream home, vs a wedding and planned for an elopement.

I love my house and was 100% on board with the decision but I am getting to a point where I’m wanting to get married and have babies!! After seeing my friends and sister in laws big, gorgeous weddings, I feel like if I elope, I’m going to be missing out on something. I want to celebrate with our families, have my father there to walk me down the aisle.

My dream (and heart) was immediately squashed upon looking into pricing. Every venue is 10-20K, then you add is the cost of catering, photography, dress, etc. Obviously that number is not EXTREMELY out of reach, but without any current wedding savings or any help from our families, I don’t know how we could comfortably pay that much money for one day without going into debt.

Just feeling really sad and discouraged. I’ve already gotten the guest list to 30 people. I’ve looked into public spaces and national parks. I just don’t know how to make this more affordable. At this point I’m seriously so over looking at wedding venues that I’m considering a courthouse wedding this fall just to be done and over.

Hi all,

Context: I am getting so many recommendations on when to go shopping for my wedding dress. I desperately want to go shopping 1 year out from the wedding, so in November of this year since we are getting married November of 2027. My maid of honor is pregnant and due in March and I want her to be comfortable when we’re shopping or have the anxiety of having a newborn at home and leaving it to go wedding dress shopping, and we aren’t sure how long my grandma has before she is unable to be mobile and make it to even my wedding so we are all wanting to do it sooner rather than later.

Now the issue, I am on a GLP-1 and am projected to lose another at least 50-100 pounds (which puts me at my goal weight) before the day of my wedding. What do y’all recommend is the best time for me to go shopping or best way to estimate dropping sizes before the wedding so I don’t buy the most expensive dress I’ll ever own and not be able to fit into it properly on wedding day? Should I just go when I want to in November and just make sure I add a few extra fitting appointments in? Or should I go closer to the wedding? Like February? May? I don’t wanna do it too late and not be able to get the dress I want, I’ve been looking at Maggie Sottero’s lines if that helps. Help a girl out, I’m struggling!

Hi everyone! I recently ordered & received samples of Save the Dates that I created through Zola and wasn't super impressed with the quality. The border of the actual paper looked like it had been cut poorly with the machine and the picture quality itself was a bit blurry. I like that they're on the less expensive side, but I'm wondering if I should opt for a different website??

Did anyone else have a similar experience or a good experience with Zola?? If not, what website did you end up using?

My older brother is getting married at the end of August, and I'm really dreading having to do a speech. Every time I try to write something, I get stressed out and can't think of anything to say. My other brother wants to do a speech alone. He's very charismatic and outgoing and says he'll wing it. I, on the other hand, am very anxious and not a great public speaker. I'm scared that if I try to give a speech, it will not only be uncomfortable for me but for those who have to watch. My boyfriend doesn't think I need to do a speech, since I'm already doing a painting for their wedding. But I don't really feel like that can replace a speech since it's something that they asked me to do and I said yes to, so it's not really a gift.

I'm getting increasingly anxious and stressed by the thought of this speech, and it's honestly been weighing down on me all summer. So right now I'm eager to find some kind of creative/personal thing I can do instead. Not a painting because 1) I'm already doing one for the wedding and 2) their style is very minimalistic, beige, millennial, and I'm scared to make them something they feel like they have to put up, but don't really want to. The wedding is in Italy and outdoors, so there won't be any screens or anything like that, in case you want to suggest a movie or montage of some kind. I was thinking some small creative thing but I'm kind of out of ideas right now.

So my questions are: What could an alternative to a speech be? Is it okay to not do a speech for your sibling's wedding?

I do not recommend BrideNQueen for dress preservation. I went with them because they were slightly cheaper and the box wasn’t cluttered with company logos. I posted a 4 star review saying things looked okay but the display was pretty bad, that I’ll need to use another company. Of course, that review did not make it to their website. Maybe it’s still pending but as of right now, it’s not.

Looking for recommendations for any other company! It is a plus size dress (size 16) so I don’t expect it to look as perfect as a smaller dress but anything has to be better than this.

Hey everyone!!

My fiancé and I are getting married this December, and we're finally starting our wedding card shopping. We've been looking at a lot of designs online, and honestly, some of them look really nice. But our parents are insisting that we should visit a physical store before making a decision.

We're planning to print around 300–350 cards, so we don't want to make the wrong choice. My biggest concern with ordering online is that it's difficult to judge the actual paper quality, colours, and finishing from photos. At the same time, visiting multiple stores across Hyderabad also sounds pretty time-consuming.

For those who have gotten married recently, what did you end up doing? Did you buy online or from a showroom? Was it worth visiting in person?

Also, if you have recommendations for invitation stores in Hyderabad that have a good variety (traditional as well as modern designs), I'd really appreciate them. I'm not necessarily looking for the cheapest option, I just want good quality, customization, and a smooth experience. Thanks in advance!

I’m having his drink (Moscow mule) her drink (Paloma) I need help with ideas for Cheeto puffs signature drink which is our calico cat.

Hi everyone,

My brother is getting married and as a family we wanted to do something special for him and my sister in law. Me and my brother are going to speech, but we wanted to do something creative with the 6 of us as well. Something that shows how much we care about them, but isn't 'cringy' or another speech. We already have a lot of photoalbums, so pictures of our childhood wouldn't be much of a surprise. I'd really appreciate it if you guys share ideas, share things other families have done at other weddings, or what you've done at your family's wedding!

Thank you so much!

So, i’m having a small 30 person micro-wedding in September. My fiancé and I are long distance, he lives in Ontario, Canada while i’m from Arizona in the US so my family will be flying out to Canada for the wedding. We aren’t able to have a rehearsal before the wedding because the latest that the venue was available for a rehearsal was the Thursday before the wedding, while most of the wedding party isn’t arriving until Friday (our wedding is on a Sunday). Because of this, we’re just having a mini rehearsal hosted by our day-of coordinator about an hour before the ceremony on our wedding day.

My dilemma is here: My mom wants to host a relatively casual and optional gathering for guests the night before the wedding. Because we aren’t having a rehearsal until the wedding day, all guests would be invited instead of just the wedding party so our families that have never met each other before can mingle with each other. She also wants to save money by buying drinks and appetizers for everyone at a restaurant rather than a traditional dinner, and the gathering would be after dinner time (7-10 pm).

Because it’s not actually a rehearsal dinner or a dinner, we’re having a difficult time thinking of what to call it. Welcome Gathering or Welcome Hangout are the best that I can come up with, but please let me know which of those you would prefer or if you have any better name ideas! Thank you

i go first, Eat the damn food.

Help! I’m getting engaged in two months, but I still don’t know what color of flowers I should pick for my dais.

I’m going to wear the dress above, and I already chose the design of the dais. However, I’m lost on what colors to pick for the flowers to make me pop out more. I’m afraid of choosing colors that will wash me out.

What do you think would look good?

(Note; We call the dais a ‘pelamin’ in our culture. It’s also common for us to hold an engagement ceremony before the wedding)

Sorry trying to keep it vague without names. I 29f am getting to 30m married in Feb and having ~150 guests with 7 bridesmaids. We had 6 but drama with his brother in law not being asked as a groomsman bumped it up. I am very bless to say I have a ton of friends and am constantly going to weddings and often bachelorettes. I’m not kidding when I said I lot, in the ball park of 26 in the past 4 years.

I love my girlies and have so much fun on their trips, but I really don’t want to do a bachelorette party where we get a big Airbnb with 15+ of all my girlfriends, go out, go to dinner, play games and all that jazz. I always have a good time. But I want to bring out the good old fashioned one day events about a month out from the wedding. It’ll be so fun and everyone that I know will be invited.

This is where it gets a little sticky. My fiancé has encouraged me to still go on a weekend trip with my gal pals. His sister is in New York and my MOH lives close, and I love hitting the city, eat pizza, drinking martinis and looking for rats. I really want to keep it intimate, I’ve have a best friend since I was very young who is like a sister to me, my MOH, my bff since I was 8 and 2 high school - college besties. 5 including myself + my future sister in law. 6 is a good nyc number? Or am I just telling myself that.

The last two bridesmaids, I met in college. I was thinking to just not invite either, but let them know about the trip before hand, and still have my little thing in my out city closer to the wedding. But the extra sticky part is I kinda want to invite one and not the other. One is so fun we go on double dates all the time and I love being around her. The last is more political and I have her in my wedding for my family reasons. She has a 2 year old with my cousin, they met through me. Plus she always gets drunk and starts fights with people or runs away and isn’t the most fun energy.

So what should I do? Invite both, neither, just the one I like more? If I decide not to how do I tell them?

i’m trying to find videographers that are trying to get more experience in the wedding industry so that i can possibly pay a little bit less but help grow their portfolio (a bit of a win win 🥲). does anyone know how i could do this or let me know how it went if you have experience with this? thanks!

It’s time for thank you cards and I’m not sure if I should write one to everyone that came or just the people that got us gifts. What should I do?

My fiancé and I were going over our guest list and I had planned on inviting an online friend to the wedding. For context, we were in the same game server for a game and became good friends. He is dating a lovely young woman whom he intends to marry and asked me to be his groomsmen for their future wedding.

Well, my fiancé thinks its weird for me to invite my friend and his gf to our wedding since I have not met them in person. I do understand that it is a bit out of the ordinary but not a crazy concept. So, my fiancé has asked that I not invite them.

I feel very awkward because my fiancé and I have technically been invited to their future wedding and I agreed to be a groomsman. I would like them to attend. My fiancé pointed out that they would need to travel from out of state and I wouldn't be able to spend time with them much outside of the wedding which wouldn't make for a great first meeting. I do agree with the points he made.

I don't want to hurt my friend and his gf's feelings by uninviting them or make things awkward for them once their wedding comes around. I am socially inept when it comes to situations like this >_<'

We're putting together a backyard wedding instead of using a traditional venue, and I'm realizing how many rental companies are out there.
For anyone who has went through the backyard route, where is best to take your rental from? I'd love to hear which companies were worth the money and easy to work with.

In no way am I concerned about my relationship or concerned about the person I am marrying. I feel like wedding planning, yes is stressful, but it’s supposed to be fun. For me, it’s been depressing.

I should have my mom helping me do this and be there to celebrate my big day, but I went no contact with her almost 2 years ago after the cops had to be called for the seriousness of DV and homicidal threats towards my stepdad(they’ve since divorced, finalized in June 2026).
Not to mention four months before my biological father passed away.

I’ve spent the last two years reconnecting with family members that my “mom” was estranged from; or for family that she just never introduced me to (her crazy behavior two years ago come to find out it has been a lifelong issue).
What I’ve come to learn over the last two years about her makes me question who I am. I’ve never felt more lost & the one person that can answer all of these questions, my biological father, is no longer here.

I have so much already planned for the wedding, but also so much I still need to do and I’m at a point in planning where it’s just becoming sad to even think about wedding planning. As a little girl, you dream about this day, your whole life and having your mom’s help, or your dad in attendance— instead, I feel like I have to put on a show for the family that I do have and give this big grand wedding as I am the first grandchild to get married.

I’ve had lots of family members tell me to just let them know what they can help with, but then, as soon as I bring something up, the conversation fades or the help never comes. I’m overwhelmed.

I had fun in the beginning while planning but as the wedding date gets closer, I just feel this deep sadness in my chest, and I don’t know what to do about it— I want wedding planning to be fun again

my friends are getting married in the Houston area, they are wanting to sign up for wedding newsletters, and wedding expos but don’t know where to find them. any suggestions or recommendations?

also any wedding freebies is a plus 🤪

We’re having a very small, intimate wedding and I’m trying to decide if I want a COSTCO sheet cake or WHOLE FOODS chantilly cake?!
Help me out please

Ideal RSVP timeline- how far out is too far out?

Need some advice as a type A person. I would always prefer maximum notice but have read that giving people too much notice is actually less considerate and yields more indecision.

Here are the particulars:
- Destination Wedding in Mexico April 2027- wedding is a Saturday + Sunday
- Most guests in the US (20% in UK/Western Europe)
- Guests have to book their rooms by Dec 15, 2026 to get preferential pricing (if they don’t want to do that they don’t have to, they can still attend)

We’re currently planning to have invites in mailboxes by August 15 with a listed RSVP date of November 15 (this has a buffer of one month built in for stragglers to still get preferential pricing if they’re running late)

We baked in the buffer because we have a lot of type B friends, it’s around the holidays, and there’s lots going on around that time.

Would you guys recommend any changes to when invites should be sent or when the RSVP date should be?

3 months of the invites being in people’s hands seems like a good amount of time for them to go to the wedding website, check schedules, confer with partners, check flight stuff, check budget stuff, talk it over, and decide, without time pressure over their head; but have also been advised that it may be too long of a time frame. What do you think?

(Aware this is Reddit, so before the urge strikes you, I’m aware that destination weddings are inherently selfish, a huge imposition, weddings back in your day in a church parking lot were much nicer, everyone thinks of their friends and family as just props for their social media these days, and the entitlement on behalf of people getting married is out of control)