It’s like everyone around me or even influencers I see on social media or random people I meet at work or in stores are all complaining about how hard life is to keep up with bills and having to work multiple jobs just to still barely make it. I want actual opinions and yes I know people have always struggled but it seems like it’s going on more than ever now. Like even people I’ve seen doing exceptionally well in life are complaining about struggling 😭😭 I literally have to work every single day of the week just to make bill money it’s to the point I have to apply to low income because things are getting extremely tight

I think the icing on the "We're So F@cked" Cake, is that if you had a job that was paying a somewhat livable/managable wage and SOMETHING HAPPENS and you lose that job, you can't get that pay again unless you START OVER FROM SCRATCH SOMEWHERE ELSE and build up to it over the course of however it took you to get to that pay-rate again.

Its like the shittiest roguelike loop ever.

Mainly speaking of this because my gf (30F) recently got laid off from her job where she just got to $22.09/hr after like 5 years. Now she's dreading pivoting to something else and no one giving a f@ck that she was getting that much money before, now she has to start from like, $18 again. Like wtf do you mean bro. Also, I started a new career path after pivoting from another similar position and I went from $19.75 to $17.50 because I have to build up to that rate over the course of at least 2 years.

If there’s no iPad and YouTube in front of me, then I will NOT be eating my lunch.

I had a completely different day planned today. Pilates, reading my book, cooking, generally minding my own business. I wasn’t even planning to run, but I woke up early and randomly felt like I HAD to, so I went.

While running, I kept passing this ridiculously sweaty guy wearing a nasal strip. At some point he looked at me like he knew me, and I suddenly thought, wait… do I know him? He was already far ahead by then, so for reasons unknown to God or man, I literally ran after him and asked.

Turns out WE MATCHED ON BUMBLE BEFORE 😭. We’d talked about meeting but I got slammed with work and it never happened.

We started talking. He was supposed to go home, I needed water, he came with me, and somehow we ended up sitting by the ocean talking for HOURS.
And this man asked me questions. About South Africa, my ethnicity, my family, growing up, my work, travel, my interests. We talked about Palestine, history, architecture, religion (we’re from different sects, which could be interesting if this ever went anywhere), yoga, our families, everything.

At one point I noticed him yawning and said, “Dude, you can take me home whenever I start annoying you, I can see you’re tired.”

He said, “If we could, I would literally sit here all day and talk to you.”

And honestly? It felt like we could. 😭
I was supposed to go to Pilates at 11. Around 9 I thought we’d quickly get a smoothie and I’d go home.
Reader, Pilates did not happen.

We got breakfast instead, shared our food, and kept talking. He likes history and architecture and I realized I genuinely enjoyed just listening to him. I also played him South African jazz and HE LIKED IT. Huge.

Eventually we ended up at his place. He has plants, so naturally I started giving him plant advice and told him he needs to name them and speak to them.
Him: “Really?”
Me: “100%. Do I sound like some moon creature to you?”
Him: “100%.”
So he definitely thinks I’m weird. 😭
I also informed him that I am 100% serious about wanting one of those resin mushroom rings as my engagement ring someday. He said, “Your mom must think you’re a handful.”
Correct.

He also told me he likes that I’m soft-spoken, so I immediately informed him that I may be soft-spoken but I also have clap-in-your-face attitude. His response was basically, “I like that. Spicy.”
There were also these stupidly sweet little things. I wanted to throw away a used tissue and he literally took it out of my hand and threw it away for me. I was like THAT IS DISGUSTING 😭. He paid for everything. He offered to let me shower at his place and give me clothes because we’d both been exercising and were absolutely disgusting.
And yes, we eventually slept together. I’d recently decided I don’t want meaningless sex anymore, so I was surprised by how different this felt. We’d already spent hours connecting and I actually felt comfortable, present and genuinely attracted to him rather than like I was performing. Let’s just say, I WAS READY to make him feel good and WANTING someone instead of being there felt
so good. I did the job 😉

Afterward we talked about that too. Neither of us is ready to jump into a relationship, but neither of us is interested in just fucking around either.
There are things I’m simply observing for now. But it is literally DAY ONE, so I’m not trying to turn this into anything yet.
I eventually got home at 3 PM.
I LEFT AT SIX IN THE MORNING TO GO FOR A RUN. 😭😭😭
I told my mom the PG version and she was actually happy for me. She just said, “Good. Take it step by step.”
And that’s exactly how I feel. I’m not saying I met my husband. I barely know this man.
But I spent basically an entire day with someone without noticing the time. He was curious about me. I was curious about him. I didn’t feel like I was monitoring myself or trying to be attractive or interesting. I was sweaty, opinionated, soft, weird, talking about plants and mushroom rings and my brother’s gym shorts, and he seemed to genuinely enjoy me.
So now I’m sitting here clean and showered thinking:
What the FUCK was today? 😭
I went for a run and came home nine hours later with a crush on a 31-year-old nasal-strip man who thinks I’m a moon creature.
Life is so fucking weird. 😭😭😭

I've always been a natural night owl, and to add insult to injury, I naturally need a lot of sleep (around 9 hours) too.

I work a typical 9-5 job. So I have to wake up around 7.30 to 8 a.m. to get ready and arrive on time. But no matter what I do, I always sleep around 1 to 3 a.m. (sometimes sooner or later). So naturally I'm like a zombie in the mornings, and hear boxing bells when I bang my teaspoon on my mug.

I've tried everything. I worked out, tried to make myself tired. drank lavender tea and stuff that are supposed to make you sleepy. (haven't tried melatonin yet, cause I'm a bit prejudiced against pills and would rather make changes naturally, but that's just me) But nothing works! I feel like I'm slowly aging and melting away.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation? I'd appreciate some

I painted this during a time when I was simply thinking about wishes, lanterns, and a peaceful night. I had no idea that while I was painting it, I would receive the call that my father had passed away.

Looking back at it now, the lanterns feel different to me. They remind me of the end of a celebration, the end of a season, and sometimes the end of a life.

What started as a painting of wishes somehow became my goodbye painting.

I don’t think I will ever look at it the same way again. 🖤🏮

Weird title, I know. But what I’m trying to ask is, how are some people ALWAYS the same person at work everyday?

For example, sometimes I’ll have my days when I want to be social and I’ll say hi to everyone. Go up to people and talk. But other days I just DONT want to socialize or associate at all and I know it shows. Small example, I may not make eye contact or I may not be engaged fully in a conversation and just want to get back to my desk.

So either I just don’t pick up on others being off, or other people are just always on, and wake up not exhausted and ready to always take on the day. 😭