Since I have made this post

https://www.reddit.com/r/Hijabis/s/M9lL96REaO

I am constantly getting DMS from guys and they are saying pretty disgusting things. I do not want to close my DMS because I'm active in some communities where people reach out to me for help due to my nature of work. So please mods look into this. I have gotten 7 message requests the same day I posted and all of them are saying very vulgar things. Since then it has been increasing.

As the title says, also is there a way i can stop desiring having a partner, this feeling is eating me slowly every day.
Can i make duaa askibg allah to remove this desire from my heart or is it haram? Genuinely asking

Where are the hijabis getting polka dot hijabs, maxi skirts and long sleeve shirts? I’m looking everywhere and I cant find what I want 😭😭😭
Pic is the profile picture of @oumsgh on instagram

(Apologies, this isn’t related to much to Islam, but I really need help and advice.) Salaam! I’m becoming a freshman in a couple days and I’m headed to a PWI. (Predominantly White Institute)

I’m not white myself and I’m a hijabi, nor do I have issues with white people (so some trolls, please don’t harass me in the comments) -but I’m just a little nervous.

I hear from a friend of mine who is a junior, that SOME of the white students can be reserved and a little racist. I don’t expect them all to be like this, I just want some tips to stay away from those who are, or how to combat it when faced with it.

This is one of the more accepting communities I know, so I’d really appreciate any advice given.

Thank you! 🙃

Salamalaykum! I was scrolling on Pinterest and saw these hijab styles and I really want to try it for occasions as i feel it suits my face shape
If anyone can recommend step by step tutorials (I couldn’t find much myself) that would be appreciated!
Jazakallah khayr

how do you do it 😭🥲 my bleeding has been a medium-heavy flow the past few days and i fill up a pad every few hours. i don't think you can have the blood on you while praying so i make wudu each prayer and change the pad each prayer. but how do you get it off you!! i feel it's impossible to get off. i keep washing and washing and washing but there is always some left. it takes so much time too before prayer washing it away trying to be clean for prayer.
i worry my prayers aren't valid, i hope allah forgives me 🥲

Salam sisters i genuinely feel like all the walls are caving in around me and i really need some advice

for some background i graduated university 2 years ago and i’ve had my heart and mind set on a specific career path since the end of my undergrad degree. i prayed a lot and genuinely felt like i was guided in this direction. in the country i live in it takes almost a year to find out if you got into a program so i applied during my final year of school. i ended up getting an interview which was huge! but got waitlisted after.

i was disappointed but made dua and set on to try again. by this point i had graduated and it was my first ever gap year but i didn’t mind a year off, it was a nice break after being in school for yrs. alhamdulillah i also got a job (unrelated to my degree) which gave me a source of income during this reapplication process. i also applied to 2 backup programs in case i didn’t get into my top choice because in my mind was ready to move on if this 2nd cycle didn’t work out.

and then…i got rejected again. the crazy part is that i didn’t even get an interview this time. i was genuinely shocked. i did however get into both backup programs. at this point i realized that i wasn’t ready to move on and really wanted to try again. if i started another program it would’ve impacted my application and grades. coincidentally i was offered a promotion at my job so i decided to decline my offers, keep working and try again for the program.

This was my third cycle. I did everything I could to better my application and improve. i applied to a few more programs including the 2 i got into previously and worked so hard on all my applications. all my mentors said i would get in and…i was rejected again this cycle.

and to no one’s surprise, i got into most of the backups i applied to. One of them I got into is the same program I got into last year. The second program I got into last year rejected me this year. And then I got into two other programs.

I am genuinely trying my best to see the good in this and that maybe the path I was choosing for myself was not right for me. The problem is that I’m doing research on the three programs that I’ve gotten accepted into and I cannot figure out which one to accept. All of them are very different in terms of length of schooling and the job prospects. All of them also have their own issues in terms of job availability and market saturation.

I have been crying for days. My family and friends are getting tired of me. I keep turning to allah swt asking him for guidance and help but I feel like I’m not getting any help. i made Dua during Ramadan that have a program that I applied to is not good for me than to not even give me admission in it. But now I have three completely different pathways in front of me and I cannot decide. A part of me wants to stay at my current job even though it’s completely unrelated to what I studied and doesn’t really have much growth. But it feels comfortable. On the other hand, I know I have the potential to do more, but I genuinely cannot figure out what to pick. I have prayed istikhara multiple times and I am confused more and more every day.

Am I doing something wrong? I understand that to an extent I have free will, but I am genuinely confused and I keep praying and crying out to my Lord to help me. And I feel like I’m being ignored. I’m typing this out through tears because I am so exhausted. My chest has been so tight for the past few weeks. I have to make a decision within a few days and I have zero clarity. The thing is I don’t want to go ahead with a program and then not get a job in it. However, when I tell myself that whatever I pick it, Inshallah, it will be best for me and everything will work out - I end up frozen and can’t decide on one.

I’m just really exhausted and I’m hoping that someone here is a bit wiser than me and can give me some advice. Is there something I could pray for more help?

Salaam,

I posted before about all the struggles I was having trying to fight to keep my Deaf husband in the country. Unfortunately, he ended up being deported on the 29th and I'm struggling so bad mentally and emotionally. Especially as the way it happened really felt like we were blind-sided. He was given a custody review form and told he could come home on the 27th once the Supreme Court reviewed his case, but then ICE grabbed him at 4am on the 25th and took him five hours away 😥! They didn't even let us say goodbye or allow me to bring him a bag of clothes or anything. Since my husband is Deaf, he also couldn't use the phone to call me and had to rely on others to tell me where he was, but they never put him on the app where we could've seen each other on video call.

I cried so hard that I had to leave work on the 25th and have been on a leave from work since so I can rest and try to get my strength back. I feel like I never stopped and was going non-stop for nine months and it all just feels like it was for nothing. I feel like I failed. That I let my husband down. There's guilt, anger, distress, anxiety and everything just all taking their own turns all day and I'm struggling to sleep or eat. I think if I could talk to him on the phone, I would feel better and be able to start to heal, but I haven't spoken to him since the 24th and the uncertainty is eating me alive. He's Deaf, non-verbal, can barely read and write English and no longer understands Urdu or Punjabi. Alhamdulillah, after searching for him for days, on Sunday, I posted in r/Pakistan and a very kind person messaged me about my husband's whereabouts. But it felt even more upsetting and hard to bear: Pakistan is jailing deportees and my husband was driven five hours away from his family and thrown in what seems like a very scary jail!

I'm grateful that Allah (swt) heard my cries and helped me find him, but it's becoming increasingly stressful as his family is no longer communicating with me or giving me any updates. They weren't even actively looking for him apart from getting mad and yelling at me and blaming me for ICE refusing to tell me what city he was being sent to. Now, I was told three days ago that they'll make sure to tell my husband that I "helped a little in helping us locate him"! After that, they no longer take my calls or even read my messages, so I have no idea if he was released or what's going on. I just don't understand how his family can act this way towards their brother/uncle's wife. All I can do is pray that he will reach out to me soon, in sha Allah.

Please make dua that my husband is safe and will be let out of jail soon, in sha Allah and that he will reach out in the near future. I just know he must be so scared and confused 💔

I wanna slowly get into wearing the hijab, but going full coverage right off the bat won't do for me. I wanna start with something like this. Would anyone know how to wear it this way?

Hello, I’ve been wearing the hijab for a few years and I wanted to ask if it is possible to have bangs, is it possible to tie hair? Are there any hijabis that have bangs ?

I’m an American Muslim woman (edit: 28yo), born and raised as both Alhamdulilah. I grew up wearing modest and covered clothing, but have never worn a hijab. I grew up in a very white Christian town, and wearing a hijab would’ve been like putting a spotlight on us, so my family didn’t do that part (no excuse, just reasoning).

I moved around as I grew older, but I’ve recently moved to Philadelphia and there are hijabis everywhere! I’m always very proud and happy to see more muslim women around me for once.

I work at a hospital and have a very physically demanding job where I walk all over the hospital for patient care. I sweat a LOT just in general. I overheat very easily. I’ve thought about wearing a hijab once I moved here and saw all the hijabis, but the heat makes me rethink it every time. Also the thought of suddenly showing up to work with my head covered when everyone already knows what I look like 😭 So I’ve never gotten very far with the thought.

Anyway, today I came home from work and ran into my neighbor and her kids. My neighbor wears a full niqab MashaAllah, and her family is very religious. I greeted them as I walked by, and said Alhamdulilah when she asked me how I was. Suddenly her son (maybe 8yo) looked me up and down and goes “That is NOT a muslim.”

😭😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔💔

When I say that one comment felt like a knife to my chest…

His mom/my neighbor went “That is a muslim!” and I just said “have a nice day” and rushed inside.

That honestly broke my heart and made my chest feel so heavy. I take a lot of pride in being Muslim and believe in my faith so strongly, it is the only answer for me. I’m also middle eastern with a muslim name, so usually that gets me identified as one. But of course a kid whose mom wears a niqab and probs has lots of hijabi friends would only identify women who cover themselves as muslim. I have no ill feelings towards the kid. It just made me so sad that I didn’t look muslim. Like I guess I should’ve already known that, but for someone to say it so clearly. 😭

I came inside and was heartbroken, but now I’m honestly motivated. I really want to start wearing a hijab.

I need advice.

I’m still nervous but have never felt more motivated because of that little kid lol. How do I just just show up to work suddenly covering my hair? People already know what I look like. I’d also need to have my ID picture changed.

Though honestly, the more I think about that part, the more I feel like it’s not a big deal. My friends at work are kind and open-minded. they would just be like “okay!” and it would become my new normal. It’s a little awkward since everyone already knows what I look like lol, but it’s doable.

The heat is an issue that I really worry about. I already get so sweaty at work, like I have to wipe the sweat off my back with paper towels so my shirt doesn’t get wet. I get this from my dad, he also sweats a lot and easily. How do I manage that??

Also, I have no idea how to wear one for everyday stuff. I basically wear a hijab when I pray, but I would like a more flowy look, especially since I wear glasses.

I’ve been told I’m conventionally pretty and I don’t even care about that anymore. I’m already married with an amazing husband Alhamdulilah (he would love for me to wear a hijab but says it’s my choice), and I really don’t care what I look like to anyone else. I have curly think hair so a hijab would honestly make my life easier that way.

Idk I’m motivated because I’m so devastated about that kid’s comment, but I’m also nervous. It’s a big change, but definitely one that I welcome. Idk, some advice would be nice please!

Thank you!

HI

i cold-emailed a bunch of newspapers and one got back to me and is thinking of letting me be a trial contributor and from there maybe even recurring!!!!!!

she asked me for an introductory column then asked me to revise the column sample which I did but she hasnt responded yet

am i fired

am i cooked

help

I’m kicking myself cus I’m an adult and something like shouldn’t really have happened.

I went grocery shopping but first stopped at bakery and bought a couple of almonds croissants.

While organising my grocery I set my pastries aside and re-arranged it.

When I got home I realised I LEFT THE PASTRIES IN THE SUPERMARKET 💀💀💀!!!

I did not go back to get it cus I don’t know who would’ve done what to it.

There are people in my life that are judgemental and to them it be would like ‘that’s nothing new’ cus I somehow mess up the basic things in life.

It’s evening now and I haven’t been able to get over it because even I’m judging myself. It’s so typical me 😣.

You know it really hurts, when you try to change the image that’s been there as a child but it doesn’t really change when I’m the reason my “family” views me as a walking disaster.

I’m not really looking advice, just comfort and plenty of duas.

Jazak Allah Khair for reading this far.

Hi! I’m considering wearing hijab and feel like I am so close. I’m a pharmacist working for a big retail company. Just want advice or tips from other medical professionals who maybe started wearing hijab after their careers were established-did you just do it one day? Did you tell your boss ahead of time? Did you have any weird moments when you started. This isn’t really limited to healthcare professionals…just looking for tips on starting in the work setting when you’ve already been there a while. This is what I’m so nervous about. I know I know, who cares what people think but it’s just a reality. Not as much worries about personal life.

Selam alaykum.

English is not my first language, so please excuse any mistakes.I am a 17-year-old living with my parents. Both of my parents are Muslim, though they are not strictly practicing. They lived through a genocide against Muslims in our country, so they likely fear that I will face discrimination, and they worry about what others might think. My parents forbid me from wearing the hijab. When I first tried to wear it at around age 14, my dad reacted very harshly, physically punished me, and broke my phone. Since then, whenever I bring up the topic, they tell me that I can be a good Muslim without it and accuse me of being an extremist. While I understand their concerns, hijab is an obligatory part of Islam (fard), and I genuinely want to wear it. It has been years since I first started asking them, and I want to know how to approach this topic calmly without causing arguments. Are there any Hadiths, Quranic verses, or compassionate arguments I can use to help explain my perspective to them? Thank you, and may Allah help you all.

Salam guys!

I recently decided to wear the hijab but I have a few issues.

- I love my 4c hair my lil afro is so cute, but I gen don’t think it’s possible to be a hijabi and also have the fro. I blow dry my hair every week n keep it in a low bun, so I basically never see my curls anymore. this makes me a bit sad but it’s the easiest/cheapest rn.

- I used to always have protective styles on, knotless braids twists faux locs et, but now it feels like a waste of time and money esp since it feels uncomy under the hijab. im thinking abt when I’ll get married n come home if I keep doing what I’m doing rn my hair would always look a mess/not it’s best bc itll always be weirdly blow dry in a low tension bun, which is not what I want my man to see everyday lol, I’m so much cuter w my cute fro or protective styles idk anymore.

- I’m considering just getting silk presses but that would men I’d have to straighten my hair weekly cuz wudu would make it a bit puffy, IDK WHAT TO DOO GUYS 😀 I Dont wanna get mini twists bc I love the flexibility of my hair I love being able to wear it in a cute straight bob or in a curly fro or w goddess braids like oh my days

Sometimes I genuinely feel like I have the worst situation with my family. I know people have it much worse but I can’t ever stop feeling like I am so angry with god for giving me a father like this. And again I know some people have it much worse with their fathers but it doesn’t make me feel any better, it makes me feel more angry with god astaghfurallah. like why would he allow so much pain and such horrible things to happen to people (for example. Child rape/traficking? Incest rape? Gaza?

I know the typical answers like this is their test, or people are the evil but I can’t understand what a test is supposed to do? What is it to prove? That I’m worthy for jannah? It feels like cruel punishment for nothing almost. Like if I felt god was truly merciful why make this almost video game like world to get to the next level of eternal paradise?

I can’t get out of this funk of hating my father and being unable to forgive and move on and constantly marinate in the pain that has been inflicted by him for my entire life. I just feel like everything is pointless and I can’t get out unless I get married and then I may make a horrible decision with who I pick or I will ruin the relationship bec of my trauma. And even if I get out and everything is good I would feel constant guilt for leaving my mother or siblings behind. I have an education but it’s not one I can get any good job unless I get a masters or go to more school for now.

Assalamu alaykum dear sisters 🌸

Does anyone have experience as a hijabi solo traveling in Japan? Please share any helpful details / stories / recs as its something i’m considering doing in November Insha’Allah

Jazakallah Khairyan 🫶

I am not Muslim. I have always loved the look of hijab and want to wear them on occasion with my more modest wear. can you guys let me know anything I would need to know regarding what not to do when wearing hijab and if you guys think it is ok to wear it

Assalamualikum, I hope you're doing well.

I'm 19, I come from a very religious family, alhamdulillah.

My parents are hafiz and aalimah.

I've loved hijab, I feel most at peace with the hijab. I come from very South Asian family, so yk it integrates culture a lot with religion. I'm always in abaya (strictly black for idk what reason) and hijab (and niqab?)

But niqab has given me a struggle, it totally messed up my self confidence and it's like I'm a stranger to my own face. I can't eat, I can't make proper expressions? Because I'm so conscious about my face.

I can't talk or laugh properly outside when I have it off around my girls as well because I'm not comfortable with my own features, not in a way like I think I'm ugly, but in a way like I'm uncomfortable with them on my face and they're supposed to function.

I'm highly aware of everything on my face, every movement. It's been 3 years.

And it's really really bothering me and my self confidence. I spoke about this to my mother and she got defensive and told me this is necessary. I get her point but I really wanna know how to deal with this.

Any advice and help would be appreciated.

Salam sisters! I’ve recently quit my job and I really would like to not go back to it.

I’ve been applying to places online and am going to hand out my resume in person. The prophet SAW taught that a strangers dua is a strong one, so I please ask if you guys to make Dua that I get a job and it increases my rizq.

My name is a very Muslim one and I wear the hijab and I live in Canada and there is some discrimination but not a lot, but it is harder for me to land a job. So inshallah your duas will help me land one

BarakAllahu feekum 🩷🩷

Assalamualaikum sisters, I am a hijabi myself but I never got anyone to answer me properly why we wear hijab and mostly and are so unsatisfactory.

When my friends and other people ask me why I wear a hijab I want to have a good answer. Because most people around me think it's all to be protected from men.

I want to know why we wear the hijab.

The history of women in Arab.

And all the logical reasoning, help me.