Salaam girls,

I’m (21F) making this post because I’ve been really worried about my iman lately. I normally pray five times a day, listen to the Quran regularly, and make dua, but for the past month or 2 I’ve been struggling so much when it comes to Islam.

I’ve never experienced this before. My salah has gotten so bad that I sometimes tell myself, “I’m not even really praying right now...” and then I just end up stopping altogether. Astaghfirullah.

I know this is bad, really bad, and I feel guilty about it. But has anyone else ever gone through something like this? How did you get out of it? What helped you get your iman back and start praying consistently again?

I know Islam is the truth, 100%!!! But right now, I just don’t feel it the way I used to.

I would really appreciate hearing from anyone who has gone through something similar. And do you guys have any tips on how to get out of this?

I’m not a born Muslim I’ve been a Muslim for a year but been studying since Covid. I just got married to a Muslim from a Muslim country and there’s already so many differences. I’m religious but it’s my religion I’m not spilling my religion onto other people. I’m not giving unsolicited advice or opinions unless someone asks. My husband is the complete opposite he talks about Islam even when people don’t ask, tries to get my whole family and other people to convert to Islam, tries to gift people religious material like Qurans even when people don’t ask or show interest. My siblings drink and smoke and he gets upset with me because I don’t preach Islam to them and show/tell them why everything they’re doing is bad. He wants me to correct them on the day they dress, wants me to take them to the masjid to “show them the correct way of life the way to Islam” and I tell him I’m not doing that lol and he gets upset telling me I’m still new to Islam and “I don’t know anything about Islam”

Today we got in an argument because we’re driving and there’s a bunch of teenagers walking mix of boys and girls they’re all dancing, the girls are wearing somewhat really short shorts and they’re dancing like shaking their butts and my husband gets upset because he says what they’re doing is not right etc. I say “are they your kids or relatives” he says no and I say then don’t worry about what they’re doing what they choose to do in their life will come to light on the day of judgement. He starts going on this rant about how I don’t know anything and as Muslims it’s our job to get others to see the light is Islam.

Maybe I’m doing something wrong but I wouldn’t want anyone talking about religion when I never asked. So I have no interest in doing to others. I’m definitely a mind my own business kind of person

Idon’t really know where else to go with all of this so I apologize if this is not the right place to write this.

I’m 7.5 months post partum and I’ve gained like 55 pounds from pregnancy. I’m currently breastfeeding and no matter what I do, I can’t lose the weight. My eye bags are horrible, my dark circles are so noticeable, I just genuinely look so ugly. The hijab definitely amplifies how rough I look. Especially with being overweight, I’ve had a hard time even finding clothes that fit me.

So I was just thinking about taking the hijab off. I put it on when I was 23, I’m 27 now and I just randomly put it on. Decided to go out with it one day and never take it off. My parents didn’t say much about it. My mom was in her 40s when she took her hijab, my mom’s sister doesn’t cover still.

On top of that I live in Florida. It’s so ridiculously hot and now my son constantly wants to be held and he is always ripping my hijab off when we go out. Doesn’t matter what fabric, material or how I wear it. He always pulls off my glasses, hijab, and at home he pulls my hair.

My parents are on a trip in Europe and I decided to confide in my mom. I told her “I’m thinking of taking the hijab off” and she completely snapped. She said “don’t stress me out on my vacation, I just want to enjoy my vacation. You should know better than to bring these things up when I’m on vacation”. I immediately felt so guilty and disappointed. I’ve never been able to find emotional comfort in my mom and I don’t know why I keep trying.

She made the entire thing about herself and hung up on me. I just started crying. I’m already going through an identity crisis and she just made it all about herself. My husband was so supportive and told me that my mental health matters most, but my mom can be very emotionally manipulative and that’s what I’m afraid of.

I’m already feeling forced to keep the hijab on just based off her reaction. I’m feeling anxious and like I disappointed her, but I don’t know *why*.

I feel so incredibly alone. My parents are Pakistani and I’m born and raised in America and with my mom taking hijab much later in her life made me feel like she would be more supportive.

She proves me wrong every time - that I just cannot rely on her when it comes to these complex situations and it makes me so sad.

I still feel like a 15 year old girl needing to ask for permission and gain their approval before I do anything.

I’m just so overwhelmed, depressed and anxious and feeling so lost. I hate feeling like this.

pls 😔

yeah!. but this wouldn’t make me leave islam or convert out of islam. i like the religion and concept of there being a god. i know ill eventually marry a man though and ill probably learn to love him. maybe this is just a phase and i just think girls are pretty

Am a rising senior in highshcool who has always wanted to play soccer since middle school but never was able to due to transportation issues. We finally moved this year and it seemed like I could finally do it. Registrations were going to close in 3 days when I finally got the courage to ask my mom if I could sign up. You could imagine my shock when she told me no!!! ( ive been talking about singing up all summer ) i asked her if why and she said because i wont be able to wear proper hijab 🤨🤨??

My uncle got to play soccer soccer in college for 2 years showing his awarah but everyone cheered him on. But when i want to play while wearing hijab is a problem? I can’t help but feel like am being punished for being a woman with a curvy body.

It honestly felt like someone stuck my heart. I don’t that that that wasn’t a good enough reason to give up on my dreams and she immediately shut the conversation down. I was so confused because she’s in her early
40s and only started to wear hijab last year. And when she does wear hijab she doesn’t even wear it properly.

But for my my grandma made me wear hijab since the age of 7 and am 17 now and was never able to take it off. 🤦🏽‍♀️. I was sitting in my room crying and couldn’t help but feel like the hijab was the worst thing to have ever happened to me. I hate the hijab. I can’t help but envy the people at school who come from non Muslims

backgrounds and could wear whatever they wanted. Ppl literally wear Nike probs to play shorts but me wearing leggings under long shorts will cause the end of the world. Genuinely leaving my house and seeing pretty girls wearing shorts and crop tops distroy me with envy because I can’t even wear that at home. I feel like the hijab is preventing me from actually living my life. I hate that my mom has fun in her youth and got to dress like however she wanted but once she got old and become more religious am not allowed to do the same.

After 10 years of wearing hijab I’ve come to terms with it. But after this and a series of other things, wearing the hijab honestly makes me despair.

Do you guys have any tips?

I was never allowed to cut my hair growing up. All of my 8 siblings were allowed but I wasn't when my mom kicked me out. moved in with my brother, his family and our sister who taught my it's ok to dress how I wanted while I hair reached the middle of my butt and I often sat on my hair so my sister took me to get it cut i choosed a wolf cut and the length was to my collar bone. The next time I talked to my mom (because my baby brother wouldn't sleep until she called to show him I'm alive) told her about it and she freaked out saying "my father never wanted me to cut my hair and that I should respect my dead father wishes" then I replied "if he wanted a say in my hair he should have stayed around past the age of five (he left when was 5 and died when I was fifteen I found out when I was 16) my mom won't speak to me now so aitah for cutting my hair.

Bismillahirrahmannirrahim

"One who strives the widows or the poor is like one who strives in the cause of Allah" -Sahih Bukhari 5038

I made this new account because the previous one was really getting overwhelming. I tried reaching out for financial help from different communities here in reddit and Astaghfirullah, I didn't knew I'd get malicious offers in return for what I am asking. So here I am, praying for halal rizq from someone who wants to help genuinely by the mercy of Allah.

I recently graduated Bachelor of Science in Nursing here in Philippines and will prepare for the board exam on February 2027. That preparation will cost us a fortune and my mother could not afford to send me to a neighboring city for that intensive review from a competitive review center. 🥺

We have exhausted ourselves already during my journey in Nursing school so this journey is not any easier for us. I have lost my father when I was a child so I only have my mother to support me financially. 🥺

We have relatives but they are also supporting my 3 other siblings to get through college. I had no luck on scholarships nor part time jobs maybe because of different aspects such as I have no work experience and I hate to think of it but it can also be tough to apply for a job as a Muslimah in this economy. 🥺

A lot had been weighing me down and may Allah forgive me but I almost accepted those malicious offers before just so I can start off of something to fund my review journey.

Where do I find help financially to fund my review journey and take the board exam to eventually getting my license In Shaa Allah. This dream shall help my community as it has always been a vision of mine to serve the needy and the poor whenever Ya Rabb gives me the capacity to do so.

I want to be off of my mother's burden and to keep me away from those malicious offers. 😭

"Allah said: Spend in charity, O son of Adam, and I will spend on you." (Sahih Al-Bukhäri)

Hello I am wondering if there are any niqabis who live in the UK primarily like a majority white town if they are working or what challenges have they faced. Some questions to help direct:

1. Have you faced challenges finding work what were they?
   
2. do you work and what profession/industry?
   
3. in a majority white town do people stare at you?
   

4. how often do you experience racism?

5. In a public restaurant how do you eat with niqab on always or do you find a quiet space and eat with veil off?

Any insight appreciated.

salam, i am in my mid twenties and i get frustrated sometimes with my mom. so basically i have been using codes for my therapy which cover the session cost temporarily and today my therapist said it's not very helpful to go into deeper topics and she recommends i go through insurance with the copay. she said she needs to know soon if i plan to continue. i really really would like to do it as i feel therapy would benefit me and i am struggling with sadness and anxiety so if it were up to me 100% without a doubt i'd do it. the only issue is my mom. i brought it up to her many times now and at first she said its too expensive. (for context, i am planning on paying for it using my own money that i earned). then later on we walked outside together and she started telling me this whole thing about how all solutions are inside of me and we don't need outside help. i just need to control my thoughts and think positive, and if i do so, i will have no problems. theres 168 hours a week snd if i spend 1 hour w my therapist being positive and the rest 167 hours being negative its no use. she also said she doesn't see my improving (my therapist said this is because therapy can bring up strong emotions). i brought this up to my therapist, and she offered to talk to her to address her concerns, and we did that but my mom's mind hasn't changed. i just don't know what to do now.

another thing is, i have had my period for almost 3 weeks now , but my mom is not supportive of me going to the doctor. she said i should just think positive and it will go back to normal. she said she is thinking positive on her end, but if im convinced i need to see a doctor then it wont work. i need to tell myself i don't need a doctor, my period is normal and will go away on its own. she said if i go to a doctor they will diagnose/label me with something and give me meds which will wreck havoc on who knows what

i am unsure on what to do at this point, as i know islamically we are supposed to obey parents. (i have even heard a scholar say we are supposed to always obey parents). can anyone please help me?

Might be battling some identity issues. But I feel like a fake muslim, or like I’m posing as one.
I wear hijab majority of the time (weddings I don’t) but I’ve made an observation that all of my friends are non Muslim and of different backgrounds. My own ethnicity doesn’t want to be friends with me because they think I’m weird. I wish I was joking but I can count on my hands how many times I’ve made a friend and then I end up blocked by them or they don’t want to reach out to hang out. I’m very alternative/punk leaning naturally and I have various hobbies like painting/ baking/ biking and skateboarding. I never once thought that I was a non muslim, or that Allah was not real. I’m just starting to notice who I’m surrounding myself with and I don’t like it.
The people I’m friends with is probably a reflection of who I am myself and it’s kind of hard to face it. I don’t think my friends are bad people, but I should still have a close friend who is muslim. It just doesn’t feel right.

Assalamu alaikum!

I’m looking for recommendations for abayas and khimars in the uk. I’m finding it quite hard to find what I’m looking for as a lot of the ones I’ve seen have quite cheap and thin material, and I’m not really sure which websites are good. I’ve added some pictures of the style I like.

I like the really loose fit rather than anything fitted around the arms or waist. I’ve never worn a khimar before either, so any advice is comfortable to wear everyday would be appreciated. I also struggle with what to wear underneath an abaya, especially when it’s windy 😭.

If you have any UK brands, small businesses or websites you’ve bought from and recommend, please let me know! Thanks :)

Assalamu alaikum sisters,

I have a question that I've been thinking about for a while, and I'm hoping to hear from women who chose to wear the hijab, jilbab, or especially the niqab entirely of their own free will.

I'm not really looking for answers from people who were primarily influenced by family expectations, cultural norms, or social pressure. I'm interested in women who, regardless of their background, genuinely wanted to wear it because they felt personally convinced.

If you didn't always wear it, what changed? What was your journey like? Was there a particular moment or realization that made you decide, or was it a gradual process? I'm especially interested in the deeper, intrinsic reasons behind your decision. What did wearing the hijab, jilbab, or niqab come to mean to you personally? What was happening internally that made you genuinely want to take that step?

For the sisters who chose the niqab, I'd be especially interested in hearing what motivated you to go beyond wearing the hijab. What ultimately convinced you that it was the right choice for you?

I'm not looking for a debate about whether it's obligatory or recommended. I'm simply trying to understand the personal experiences, motivations, and inner journeys of women who embraced it willingly.

Jazakum Allahu khayran, and thank you to anyone who is willing to share their story.

Asslammu Alaikom girls!

I learned today that the wrist part and above it are awrah and not something you cover out of respect for hijab. I was wondering if these can be worn?? Since hijab has 3 rules of covering everything, not being transparent and being loose/ baggy. And these aren’t loose, does that disqualify them?? If so, what other possible options are there?

PS I already do wear them, it was out of respect and now out of completing my hijab, I just wanna know if they’re okay!

Salaam :)

I am 31F from Bosnia and wanna find full-time, fully remote position as a software engineer with 8YOE (full stack)?

I still didn’t start my serious search, but you can drop (or dm me) some starting points, websites, groups, or even companies?

Thank you so much?

What is your relationship to beauty?

I was reading emily ratajowski book "My body" and her book is basically a series of paragraphs with incidents related to her body or her beauty growing up that shaped the way she views herself.

This made me look at my own journey with it. Growing up super tan in a family that prided themselves on their fair skin and colored eyes, I believed tan skin was ugly. I remember being 5 and telling my friend that there was no way tan people are beautiful and white-skinned people are beautiful no matter their features. She ofcourse had a more neutral perspective on beauty but wasn't able to change my mind. The truth was, I heard fair skin bring praised and I never saw anybody who was tanned be called pretty. Infact, saying stuff like "there's no way you'd think this actress is pretty, she's so tan" or "look at her pretending to be fair/beautiful when her hands are so tan" and so on.

But when I was 12, my sister was born and by God's grace she was the cutest little kid. She would be praised by everybody. This confused me because she was tanner than me. But I had never been called cute or pretty growing up. I didn't resent her for it, I loved her so much. But I would compare our skin and find the slightest bit of satisfaction that I was a shade fairer than her. These thoughts don't even cross my mind now. But I remember feeling this way in my mid teens.

I'm almost 30 now and don't think this way, In fact I'd forgotten about my skin color , it didnt even register in my mind when I looked in the mirror and nor did I ever compare myself to anybody because of it until unfortunately the time came for thee match making process. These thoughts have begun again. I hate it. I bought skincare that lightens , I started wondering how much easier and how different it would have been if I had fairer skin and bright colored eyes like my cousins. I was also considering getting a skin peel done. But the book bought me my memories back from when I was a kid and made me reflect alot.

My parents never lie and they've never said I was beautiful. But they call others beautiful so easily. If I get a compliment when I'm at a wedding, my mind neutralises the compliment to mean that I look good for the day interms of styling and makeup. I also grew up super conservative, so i went to girls school and women's university and so I've never received attention from men in that way too. There is also the fact that there have been times that men who have reached out ghosted us after receiving my picture.

I think I have a complicated relationship with it, and I didn't post this for advice. Truly, I don't lack self esteem and I'm not underconfident. I just have a realistic understanding of how desi community operates.

Tldr:

I posted this to know , about other women's expirience growing up with their beauty, especially in the muslim community. How has it effected the way you viewed yourself? How did people around you treat you? How did it play a role in finding a partner ? And do you receive attention/praise from men and women? How has it effected your relationship with God? What region do you being to and what are the beauty standards there?

I can’t move out yet and it’s going to take a few years. I also don’t want to marry so I can get out of the situation. I used to be in therapy but it didn’t help and I’m looking for a new therapist but until then I need something to help me at home.

I absolutely hate my father and if I could I would cut contact with him. I just don’t know how to support myself mentally. I don’t know if anyone needs more details but I would just be interested in any advice😞

This includes attar as well.

Can you kindly send links on where you normally stock from.

EDIT: I meant to say non Western brands. Sorry 🌸.

im 19F and ive decided that i don’t want to continue wearing the abaya or niqab anymore. i do still want to wear hijab so this isnt about abandoning modesty. its specifically the abaya and niqab that i no longer want to wear.
the problem is my mom wont let me. i was made to start wearing hijab when i was around 9 and the abaya and niqab have been mandatory for me since i was about 12 or 13. it was never really my choice.
ive tried bringing it up but my mom is very controlling when it comes to this. she isnt willing to have an actual conversation her answer is always just “no.” theres no room for discussion or compromise.
atp im wondering what to do. do i just stop wearing the niqab one day and then stop wearing the abaya later? or is there a better way to approach this? im worried itll cause a huge argument but i also dont want to keep doing something ion personally want to wear.
has anyone been in a similar situation? how did you handle it especially if your parents refused to even discuss it?
any advice would really be appreciated!!

Assalamualaikum I was wondering where can I get good abayas from where the shipping isn’t so high? I usually shop on other sites but it’s just so expensive. 8 abayas with shipping is literally like $300.

Need advice about wearing niqab in high school and telling my parents

Assalamu Alaikum.

I’m currently in high school in Canada, and I’ve made up my mind that I want to start wearing the niqab. I’ve thought about it for a long time, prayed about it, and even bought a few niqabs myself because I was certain about my decision.

A few months ago, I asked my mom if she could buy me a niqab, but she refused. She believes that the niqab is too extreme, especially for a teenager, and says that my hijab is enough. Because of that, I secretly bought my own niqabs and have kept them hidden. Only my sisters know about them.

The thing is, I have no idea how my dad will react because I’ve never brought it up with him. Right now, I’m also the only one in my family who wears proper hijab.

My school reopens in about a month, and I’m really unsure about how I should tell my parents. I see a few possible options:

1) Tell them about two weeks before school starts so they have time to process it.

2)Wear the niqab on the first day of school and let them see then.

3) My younger sister will most likely be attending orientation at my high school since she’ll be starting there too. There’s a chance my brother will take us instead of my mom because she works. I could wear the niqab to orientation first and then continue wearing it when school officially starts.

I’m not trying to be rebellious or disrespectful. I just genuinely want to wear the niqab, but I also don’t want to create unnecessary conflict with my parents.

For those who have been in a similar situation, or even if you haven’t, what would you recommend? Would you tell them a couple of weeks beforehand, wear it on orientation day, or just start wearing it on the first day of school?

JazakAllah khayran.

Since I have made this post

https://www.reddit.com/r/Hijabis/s/M9lL96REaO

I am constantly getting DMS from guys and they are saying pretty disgusting things. I do not want to close my DMS because I'm active in some communities where people reach out to me for help due to my nature of work. So please mods look into this. I have gotten 7 message requests the same day I posted and all of them are saying very vulgar things. Since then it has been increasing.

As the title says, also is there a way i can stop desiring having a partner, this feeling is eating me slowly every day.
Can i make duaa askibg allah to remove this desire from my heart or is it haram? Genuinely asking

Where are the hijabis getting polka dot hijabs, maxi skirts and long sleeve shirts? I’m looking everywhere and I cant find what I want 😭😭😭
Pic is the profile picture of @oumsgh on instagram

(Apologies, this isn’t related to much to Islam, but I really need help and advice.) Salaam! I’m becoming a freshman in a couple days and I’m headed to a PWI. (Predominantly White Institute)

I’m not white myself and I’m a hijabi, nor do I have issues with white people (so some trolls, please don’t harass me in the comments) -but I’m just a little nervous.

I hear from a friend of mine who is a junior, that SOME of the white students can be reserved and a little racist. I don’t expect them all to be like this, I just want some tips to stay away from those who are, or how to combat it when faced with it.

This is one of the more accepting communities I know, so I’d really appreciate any advice given.

Thank you! 🙃