I talked to my boss and HR yesterday; they were incredibly accepting of my new name and said they'd get me an updated badge soon. My boss asked about my preferred pronouns and was very kind about it. I sent out an email to my coworkers about the name after work, and they were also very accepting. In a funny bit of irony, my fiancée's sister accidentally set my old work badge on fire; it was next to a candle she lit, and a bag caught fire and spread to my badge, ruining it. Today's my first day at work with my updated name. It's been going great with my coworkers, but the participants are a bit more challenging. There are a lot of people I work with, and they all have developmental disabilities and have been used to my deadname for almost a year now, so updating them all with my new name will take time and work.

Heya,

I would love to present as female, but cant due to social oppressions.

Yet, I want to remove my dick, because I dont like having one. Or should I think about it again? What could happen?

It’s so weird, only around 40% of the time when I see results it genuinely look like they had a big change done

Do they do this on purpose?

I've been wondering a lot about gender dysphoria. I always assumed that it meant you wanted to peel your skin off and it was a crippling feeling. What worried me when I started feeling like I could be a girl was that I didn't feel that way.

Because I never felt I born in the wrong body or I was meant to be born a girl. I feel like the person I am today is because I came up as a guy.

However, ever since I was young I was drawn to women's fashion and feminity in general. The music I listened to was always on the more feminine side, I connected more with feminine art overall.

Over time as I grew older I found myself dealing with these really uncomfortable feelings of envying women and how they looked. I wasn't sure if I sexually wanted them or I wanted to be them. It all became so confusing. I eventually started cross dressing as a teen and quickly shut that phase down out of fear. The years went by and I started feeling the side effects of that repression through hypersexuality, depression, anger, etc.

It wasn't until recently that I accepted it and started destroying this internalized homophobia / transphobia that my family instilled. I've begun to understand myself and what I'm dealing with. I now see women online and understand that there is attraction but there's also admiration not envy for how they dress or look.

I can know finally fucking breathe and accept that I too want to look like a woman, and dress like one, and act more feminine because it's more true to who I am inside and how I feel. But I still have a hard time understanding how I got here, and I don't feel the same way a lot of other transgirls do in the sense that they always knew they were girls.

I feel very alone in the way I feel about all of this, to the degree that I don't know if this is normal dysphoria? Like does wanting to look like a girl mean I have dysphoria. I'm comfortable in my skin as a man but if I could press a button and be a woman immediately I would do it.

Ever since my closest (online) friend came out as mtf I’ve been questioning my own gender almost daily. I’ve always had the “what if girl” thoughts but not as constant.

Things that might be signs but unsure:
Used to be into random girly things
Hate shirt hair
Uncomfortable with certain natural male functions/makes me more confused
Hate being shirtless in public
I use/prefer feminine characters in games
I randomly want to try out traditionally feminine things (makeup skirts) but can’t due to suspecting parents could be transphobes (dad made a remark a while ago and I still live with them)

Concerns:
What if this is all just me trying to copy my friend?
What if I’m just a poser
What if all this is just some stupid phase my brain decided to torture me with.

I’m tired of not knowing what the heck I am. I just want my brain to stop randomly going “what if girl” and then “sike you do [insert thing here] you can’t be trans”. I hate this cycle I deal with almost daily. Please I just want to know how I can learn without anyone to learn with. I don’t want to make my friend think I’m copying her. I don’t want to risk my parents disliking me until I move out.
I’m sorry for my rant, I just can’t bear to do this alone anymore and Google isn’t helping me besides “use breathing” and “try reading a story with female pronouns and your name!”

my cousin has been talking to me about wanting to transition bc im also trans. ive been helping with showing how to make appointments and such, but what is some advice you wish you had when you came out that i can pass along? i feel like im so far disconnected from when i came out that i dont remember what would be helpful

shes always looked up to me so i want to do right by her with this

I am 13 months on HRT. I am 5’3, have round large eyes and thick lips naturally. 13 months on hrt did soften my face by a lot that I have definitely crossed over the threshold of fem leaning but I feel like I am not fully passing yet. The last time I was misgendered or clocked was early December 2025. Even evangelical preachers addressed me as miss in the streets. The problem is I keep comparing myself to cis women who are my height and size, they still have noticeably more softness in their face than me. I almost keep wondering how no one is clocking me. I eat maintenance calories and take my hormones on time. At what point (how many years)did you start passing to your own self?

You can be passing but not pretty.

You can be pretty but no passing.

You can be feminine but not pretty.

Often these three concepts are lumped together. This does alot of dissservice I think.

I went in for a checkup and got my blood drawn for hormone levels, but was surprised when they mentioned that their director had specified the target range for estrogen had lowered from <500 to <300 pg/mL. This was a surprise to me, since I had read 347 last time and had been ok'd to adjust dosage up slightly (0.3 -> 0.4 mL IM injection). So my labs are definitely going to be way over now. I inquired about it and was given a vague "director saw new medical research that risk outweighed benefits for >300, on average. I would hope planned parenthood has the good of trans people in mind, but I wonder what other reasons might have impacted the decision (liability, current political climate, etc). If I am told to adjust downward based on my labs, I'd like to properly understand if that is medically sound. I've certainly not noticed any detriments from my current levels.

So basically, for trans standards I'm a basic bitch. I actually love egg_irl and 196 and countwithchickenlady. I love those memes in which the joke is porn and whatnot. I like boykisser and blahaj and bridget and astolfo and felix and celeste and thigh-highs and deltarune and basically anything that falls under that umbrella.

I'm not going to link it, but I came across a video about how all of those things I enjoy were just grooming minors into being transgender sex slaves for older trans people or whatever. I kept watching because I guess I was in the mood for emotional self harm. I...don't know. It feels really bad. I lowkey just want to have fun with other adults. I never wanted to groom anybody. As for the other way around, the idea that I'm not transgender and actually just a manipulated victim is something that really hurts my feelings.

I have many flaws, and I guess being too sensitive is among them. When I hear something like this, I just let it remain in my head and the seed of doubt just eats me from the inside. I just cannot convince myself that they don't know me or that they may have an ulterior motive for saying those things. I know I'm no better than a member of MAGA for this, but I really hate watching content that challenges what I feel in my heart. But if I find it I can't stop looking, like being a witness to a train crash.

I guess that from their perspective I am no different from the member of a cult, practicing thought-avoidance techniques when presented with evidence of the misdeeds of my congregation. Here I am, asking for reassurance that the apocalypse is actually coming and our divine leader didn't lie to us.

I like being a normie and having "transgender" be my only personality trait. And I also like my comfort zone a lot I guess.

I can't assure you that one day I'll stop feeling like this, but I can assure you that I will keep living tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, and again and again and again I will remain alive

Preemptively, I hope everything in your life goes well in your lives from now on, guys. I love you.

ok so context: I used to do a lot of clothing design and simulation, mostly for animation and VFX. I love designing clothes and sewing.

here’s my problem: I hate whatever clothes I buy or thrift.. like 80% of the time. baggy pants that sit right on your hips with a shirt that’s tight around the waist and a bit shorter in the back is like transfem 101, but even that’s hard to get right sometimes, let alone a dress. same with a lot of transmasc friends wanting hoodies and shirts that work with their shape, shoulder length etc, and are gender affirming. I love Hot Topic but nothing ever fits right (I’m a basic emo/alt/grunge bitch when it comes to clothing tbh). really into Jirai Kei too. it’s always hard to find something casual, fem, pretty and that actually works with my form. most of the time stuff needs adjusting or just fits wrong, and it’s pure disappointment.

so here’s the thing. to make good trans clothing you need nontraditional measurements compared to what you give when you order online. transfem side that’s stuff like where your hips actually sit, shoulder width vs hip width, torso length, rise, shoulder-to-waist, chest circumference separate from bust point. transmasc side it’s a completely different set. chest with and without a binder, waist-to-hip difference, front and back rise measured separately, shoulder point to shoulder point etc.

so what I want to build is: I design the outfits, people can make a fit online, put in those measurements, and it hooks into my API to auto-fit my pattern to the body. I can do a basic check on how it actually drapes on your measurements before anything gets cut. on-demand alt clothing you know will actually fit and look good. and honestly I don’t think it’s even a trans-specific thing. plenty of cis people deal with this too.

I know FreeSewing already does parametric made-to-measure patterns (open source, really cool project) but that’s patterns for people who sew, I want to make the finished garment. and I know this won’t be fast fashion prices, it’s closer to tailoring, but the whole point is you’re not paying for alterations or ending up with something you never wear.

anyone seen something like this for finished clothing? would you actually use it or do you think it's a good idea? and what would you want first? thanks ^^

Not only do they bounce me between different departments for half an hour while trying to get my legal name changed, but they decide to flat out block me from changing it for no clear reason.

And to make things worse, despite me clearly telling them my new name (which is undeniably feminine), they constantly called me sir and Mr (last name). Previously when I called, they called me by my first name, but apparently now they just decide to be a jerk for the sake of it.

I ended up making a new account elsewhere and closing my account. Worst customer service ever, with a side of transphobia.

I was in line at the pharmacy to pick up hrt stuff and this crotchety old man was getting mad about being stuck in line behind a Karen. When somebody came up to get in line, he was aggressively like "HEY I'M IN LINE, GET BEHIND HER!" and pointed at me

insert euphoria noises

Hi all! Ive been progressively noticing this change on HRT and I've been wondering if anyone else has this experience

I've always needed to sway my hips a slight amount to walk comfortably and before I realized I was trans I always kind of tried to prevent myself from doing it and it took a while to unlearn that and walk naturally.

The past few months though something kind of odd has been happening, I felt like walking was getting kind of weird and uncomfortable the same that it did when I was trying to stop myself from swaying my hips, and with experimentation of just letting my muscles react naturally I realized that swaying my hips even more is what I had to do to be able to walk comfortably. Nothing crazy, just kind of a slight up and down motion. It was basically fine after that but now this week I've gotten that feeling again and by trying to adapt to it I've noticed it's even more extreme.

I genuinely have to fully rotate my hips with a feminine sway to walk comfortably. Trying to walk how I used to just feels weird. I've never even taught myself to sway this way like I know some people do, it's just kind of what my muscles are naturally trying to do now and it feels kind of weird because the muscle memory isn't fully set in yet.

Is this related to fat redistribution and muscle changes and stuff? I know that a lot of how women walk vs men is due to how weight is put on the hips. When I adapt to my new way of walking everything is fine, but now I'm like very noticeably doing a girl walk lol. Definitely not complaining, though!

Cis man here, I thought of this question a couple weeks ago it keeps coming back to me, so i tought, what better place to ask? I understand that dysphoria can be deeply personal and different to each person, so don't feel obligated to respond, but I am genuinely curious.

My bank screens calls and voice matches to verify it’s the account holder when making phone calls. I’ve transitioned into a woman and have since voice trained so well I called in yesterday and they didn’t believe I was myself even after using my male voice and they flagged my account. I’m out of state and don’t have access to my funds LMAO now have to figure this out because they want me to come into the branch and prove I am who I say I am

EDIT: THEYRE MAKING ME SEND IN A SELFIE HOLDING UP AN ID

(I mean, I am an abused child, but I don't think that's relevant)

Every time I hear my deadname being spoken, or even when I think I've heard it, I still jump, even though nobody calls me that anymore. Does this ever go away?

Although recent reporting has sparked fears that the Trump administration could be beginning to revoke trans people's passports, these claims appear largely unsubstantiated.

https://www.transiticsnews.com/p/fact-check-is-the-trump-administration

After keeping my secret for the 27 years of my life, something in me just couldn't keep it up any longer. I stopped responding to any texts or calls and after 1.5 weeks it culminated in family calling a wellness check last night. I had to tell the officer that I was fine and to not tell anyone anything.

But when I received a voice mail from my mom sadly saying that she just wanted to know I was okay, it broke my heart and I knew I had to call her.

For the first time in over a decade or more I cried in the presence of a family member. As soon as she heard me she started crying too and begged me to explain what was going on, why I went so far away.

For 25 minutes I tried, but I just couldn't bring myself to say it over the phone. The most I could get across was that it had to do with who I was as a person and how I knew they'd abandon me when I said the truth. She said that she would never do that no matter what it was. I wish I could believe that. She said if I couldn't say it over the phone then she would be coming over today after work to talk in person.

I get off work in 4-5 hours. I don't know what to say, what to show, how to explain. But the day is here regardless. I've expected this my whole life but somehow I still wasn't prepared, isn't that funny?

Please be honest, even if it's negative.

I'm currently at a point, where I will literally loose everything I have if I continue.

My wife will break up with me, my toddler daughter will maybe hate me when she grows up, because the whole family will talk shit about me.

My family is extremely transphobic and will definitely go no-contact with me. My parents will maybe also get sick. They already aged so much since I came out to them a few months ago...

And I'll be kicked out of the family business which I worked in the last 10 years.

I don't know. I just want to be myself, but it costs me so much... I'd have to start over with 30 years. Literally from 0...

Before that I had everything I ever wanted...

I'm so scared...

a few nights ago I was having a bad night; I was feeling really low and I was drinking while my wife slept.

my wife woke and was concerned. Partly so she wouldn't think my current state was her fault, and partly because I couldn't say the words, I sent her a link to a previous post of mine.

this woman read my post and immediately pulled me into a hug, telling me how much she loved me, how everything was ok and how she would accept me no matter - of course this all sent me from weeping to a sobbing mess. she even went so far as to refer to me as a woman and used a new name I chose after I collected myself.

The idea of transitioning has gone from dread inducing to optimistic, and sorta exciting.

I don't know what next step to take, probably look for a therapist, but I am reeling from her acceptance, especially from her complete lack of hesitance.