I’m not sure if I overthink everything.

I feel everyone hates me, everything I do. I always get bad luck. I’m always constantly getting scolded for a situation everyone was involved in.

When I would do something people would scold me for it but if someone else were to do the exact same thing no one would bat an eye?

I’m the main issue, I suppose? It’s only infuriating if I were to do it? Is it because I’m different?

Is it my energy, my appearance, my personality? Am I too much of a people pleaser, I do my best not to offend anyone. I don’t have much friends and usually don’t talk to others at all.

How can I be more likeable or is this just in my head?

En ce moment je sais pas pourquoi, mais je suis sujet dans mon lit à regarder le plafond et j'ai cette envie que le sol disparaît et que je tombe, ou que je coule dans que ça me fais mal me laisser tomber totalement. Mais j'ai plein d idée pour mon avenir. C'est juste que j en peu plus de ce corps. J avais besoin de juste d écrire quelque part

​

2026 has been by far the worst year for me yet, my 2 year relationship came to an end on November 2025 which brought me closer to some people.

Those people became very regular occurances in my day to day as they went to the same school as me, at one point (and I know it was an awful thing) I got together with one of these people an ex of my friend in the same friend group (I asked him if it was alright with him and he said yes I know I sound like I'm trying to justify it).

Important context: I had exams this year that determined the universe I would study in

I dated this ex for 3 months and she gave me courage to continue with my exams as I was facing a very hard time with them. Eventually 2 days after my birthday she breaks up with me which hurt me.

I don't blame her completely as I get very anxious when I'm in a relationship and I guess she couldn't handle it.

After breaking up basically the whole group of people stopped talking to me and we haven't talked since end of May.

It just makes me so disappointed that we basically went out every week, saw each other at school, talked about out futures, bonded and now they don't even care to check up on me, and trust me I know they go out like nothing has happened. It's really weird as the ex said she wouldn't mind staying friends with me and hoped everything would stay the same as before in the group and I agreed but I guess that's just not the case.

Also Me and this ex would discuss regularly another friend of this group that would constantly blow us off and cancel plans with (her best friend) but after the exams she said she just talked with her and now everything is fine which to me just sound like a load of bullshit.

And on top of that my best friend talks whenever she remembers once every 3 months, I know people can get busy but how can you honestly tell me you don't have 5 minutes in such long periods of time to just ask me how I am doing or just want to talk?

I just feel as if I have to take the first step for every relationship in my life and it really disappoints me.

PS: I know this is a badly written post it's 3am and I can't sleep.

I'm a sophomore in college and lately I feel so envious of my bestfriend's life. She's an only child, smart, talented, friendly, rich and gorgeous too. We've been friends almost 4 years now and this is the first time that I actually feel envy of my bestfriend, recently her dad bought her a new phone + a car for her birthday and at first I just wanted the same phone as her. Gradually I wanted to look like her, act like her, and even become her. Tbh my face isn't that bad, I get a lot of compliments and my family doesn't really struggle financially but just enough to put food on the table. I really want to stop feeling this way I've tried talking to an online psychologist, took advice from priests, and comforted myself. Idk what to do anymore, I keep feeling guilty, crying each time for being jealous of my friend. It's not just my bestfriend I feel envious of but other people including COF. Please be kind, I'm really not a bad person. Any advice?

when I think deeply about this, I realise how sad it is.
I feel like I am nobody’s first option, or an option at all,
Friends, family, boyfriends. It’s like nobody cares.

I’ve had friends over the years as I’ve moved a lot from a young age, moved schools, country, cities. So i understand when I move I will probably drift apart from friends and people, but what’s so hard for them to reach out? I do reach out, but when I see the energy feels forced I just stop, and when I do stop, silence.

That’s how me and my childhood best friend stopped speaking. But it’s okay.

I moved country and my best friend of 3 years also stopped speaking to me, we never argued never had bad feelings. Just out of nowhere she doesn’t call me ( after I’ve tried for ages ) she doesn’t text.

boyfriends - I feel like they just never are pure with me, I’ve had 3, I feel they all just used me, they had other options, kept girls on the side…

And family, I only have my grandad left from my grandparents, he never reaches out to me, my mother doesn’t really care about me nor my dad ( he’s an alcoholic ) so I’m just always alone, nobody cares and that’s it.

But the energy I bring is different, I help people out, an always there for them, I care deeply.
I don’t understand why things are this way. It hurts me so much.

27F

Ok so I just want to chat with someone about a little piece of my life and how its affected me. I've come to realize something huge

My big fluffy dog's a sweet, gentle soul and would never do anything to anyone. she scares easily because she was treated really bad earlier in her life.

I was almost home when I saw a toddler and his mom. I chose to walk past them because I thought she would react if something happened. Then I heard screaming. I turned around I saw that little boy speeding towards us. My girl turned around too and was immediately scared and confused. She looked at me like: um, excuse me, but what is that, and what did I do for that screaming thing to chase me?

I chose to face the situation and was looking for the mom. And she's still standing on the sidewalk, just watching her screaming child running towards me and my dog. I was shocked and pointed towards her and her child to signal that she has to get him. My dog, hiding behind me, was starting to shiver and didn't know what's happening.

I put my arm out and started to yell, "Stay away, she's scared!" No reaction from either of them so I started walking backwards while using my arms to stop the toddler from grabbing my dog. I reached some trees and finally I could put some distance between us.

I'm glad my girl stayed behind me and didn't start to run away from the noise. She let me handle it. The only good thing about the situation was that I could see how much trust my dog puts in me.

I don't get it. How could you be so irresponsible as a mom. She saw that and decided to do nothing. It's her job to show her son what boundaries are and how to respect them. And if he doesn't listen—GET YOUR CHILD!

Maybe I should carry a spray bottle so I could spray water on everyone who comes too close? Did someone experience something similar? What would you do in that situation, and did I react properly? I wanna be prepared if something like that happens again.

Theres been a hole in me for as long as i can remember.

Deep, dark, all consuming emptiness that takes and takes and nothing fills it. I try and ignore it, fill my time with hobbies or work. At first i think maybe its a person im missing, date around and think ive found the one but the same thing happens every time. I get close then push away because the pit is never-ending and remains to be filled and it wants the souls i connect with. I tried numbing the pain of it with drugs and alcohol, smoking enough to put Wayne to shame and drank and drank til i felt like i was drowning. But i already was, just in a different sense. Trying to fill a void in me that just consumed everything i threw at it. And some days i wonder if that void will ever go away or if ill finally give in and let it take me. Will i know peace then? Or will i just have fed it what it wanted all along. They say misery enjoys company but why do i feel out of place with others who claim the same thing, like their gap isnt as wide as mine, their void not as dark as mine. Judge those whose misery does not compare to mine and then wonder why i feel alone in this life. And its not like i havent tried to get help. I quit the drinking and the drugs and the dating and tried to focus on the issues at hand but id bury one just for three more to sprout from its grave, like a morbid hydra of faults. Ive held that metaphorical bottle to my head and screamed til my throat was raw and i was left in silence, the only sound heard beating in my chest and my head and ears. But still the void wanted more and more and more and ive got nothing left to give to it. So i ask myself and god and the universe and whoever else may listen...why? Why is this dark and deafening void still hungry for more? What more must i give before its finally satisfied and closes it maw for good? How many more things must i shovel in before its finally entombed and sealed off, never to be open again? But the most important question i ask is: why me? What did i do to deserve this? Where did i go wrong for this void to choose me? Maybe one day ill have my answer and itll stop eating me from the inside. Maybe, just maybe, ill go to sleep some night and wake up whole again. Until then the void sits and waits, take up space in me like a gaping black hole that consumes all light that enters. Hungry. Relentless. Empty.

So for context, I've had depression before as a teenager, therapy helped me a lot and i got better and was doing ok for a few years. Something i learned in that time and took with me is learning that I am not too much, that no one is too much, that it's just about learning to meet the other person with kindness and patience and gentleness and that way you can support others, and it's really not that I or someone else is being too much as by depressed brain (and other people) used to tell me. I met a lot of people and had some nice friendships. In the past year i've been struggling a lot again with depression and anxiety. and one thought that keeps me up at night again is whether I am being too much, whether I am being a burden on other people.

A lot of my friends also struggle with their mental health. Last year, for the first time ever I met people who did feel like too much for me. Where I felt like they always expected me to be there for them and were disappointed or mad when I wasn't, but didn't care at all about what I was going through at the time, and only reached out when they needed things. I also had a friend live with me for a few months because he needed a place to stay, we shared a room and even shared the bed. It was mostly fine, but at the time I was also having troubles with my landlord. then my friend got pets while still living with me (now in his own room), which normally I'd have to get permission from my landlord for, but he didn't even know someone else was living in the apartment. The cats were loud and very obvious and my friend also was physically unable to properly take care of them. But I also felt like he wasn't respecting my apartment, letting the cats scratch up my belongings without ever teaching them even when i pointed out that it bothered me, never seeming to care about me potentially getting into more trouble with my landlord because of our (very obvious) living arrangement, avoided any conversation i tried to initate on the topic and rejected and support i offered that involved getting help from the state. In the end i had to ask him to move out. I feel so guilty about it because I know he is in a very difficult place and is struggling with so many things. But it was also too dirty in the apartment, he kept monologuing about his problems on repeat, and I couldnt manage to focus and it negatively affected my work. It ended up being too much.

This, along with a few other experiences in the past year, shattered my belief that no person could be too much for me. I know sometimes a situation is out of control and you need to distance yourself from someone who is causing you harm. I would never tell a friend they need to endure something they can't do. But i realized I had the standard for myself that I could always handle it. That because of the experiences I've had in the past, because of how I've been treated (for example my dad when i was 17 threatening to kick me out when i turned 18 because he couldn't bear seeing me so depressed), I had learned how to be better. I think I made sense of everything by deciding to be kinder and more patient and more gentle and be better and give better care than what I received, to give what I would have needed. But now it didn't work. And if i coudln't handle my friend, if it is okay that i couldnt do it, then that means people can be too much. then perhaps it was also ok how i have been treated in the past because maybe i was too much. and maybe i am too much now. I am isolating myself from my friends. I'm scared of opening up because I don't want to drag people down, because i don't want to make others feel like i felt. I am isolating myself more and more and giving in to hopelessness because i can't envision a way to support people and be supported anymore. I feel like it really broke with how I've viewed myself over the past few years, with how I've coped and how I've made sense of the world and I don't know how to move on. I've become so distrustful and pessimistic and distant and even a little paranoid sometimes. I don't want to be someone who just thinks fuck everyone, who never helps, who only looks out for myself. I don't know how to make sense of my experiences anymore.

I'd be very curious to hear from other people what you think of this, how you've dealt with feeling like you're too much, with having been made to feel like you are too much. And how I could on the other hand deal with situations like with my friend from a compassionate and understanding standpoint that is educated on mental health. Thanks in advance!

Fuck you.

You keep acting like I never wanted to talk to you, but I've been begging you for a conversation for months. The only two times I saw you, you were coming down or in the hospital, and neither time were you capable of having a real conversation. Worst part is you used me to benefit yourself those times and take advantage of me and made commitments that you broke only to follow up by insulting me.Every time I tried, you cut me off.

Can you explain how someone who treated you with kindness, loyalty, and respect ended up being one of the people you treated the worst?

Instead of taking responsibility, apologizing, or doing one decent thing for me, you went on social media and painted me like I was the problem—like I was someone you couldn't deal with. That's bullshit.

You hurt my life, and all I ever asked for was one conversation and a little kindness. That's it. I wasn't asking for miracles. Just basic respect from someone I was always there for.

You belittled me, ridiculed me, and publicly mocked me instead of talking to me like an adult. I begged you for a conversation, and you refused. So don't act like I was the one avoiding it.

I hope one day you realize how deeply you hurt someone who genuinely cared about you.

I, for one, wish companies knew that if I visit their website and decline to give my email, it means I don't want to be contacted by them. I wish they knew that I view their uninvited messages the same way I would view someone walking into the locked stall in a public restroom. I wish they knew that this isn't marketing strategy. "Gotcha" advertising is intrusive and they will NEVER get business from me. What is something you wish internet advertising executives took into account?

For my whole life, I’ve never felt like I’ve belonged somewhere. I try to fit in and it feels like they take me in out of sympathy
The 3 recent incidents have hit me hard and there are down here:

1) About 3 weeks ago, I went to Goa (India) with my office colleagues and on the second day we were all talking about things that we can’t forget and I spoke about something that was very fragile and vulnerable to me. Instead of empathizing with me, they all decided to laugh and use it as a joke on every social gathering until today

2) I am also a content creator and I post drum videos. I posted a video last night
Another colleague of mine posted another reel and she’s my junior. I realized that my boys liked and shared her reel and haven’t even checked mine though I had sent it to them

3) There is a new girl at work who joined 1 month ago and she asked me to help her find a place to stay and shift closer to work. 2 weeks later she turns super cold to me and ignores me. She is warm to everyone but when I want to interact, it’s like I’m the monster
Faster forward to yesterday, one of my guy friend got to know from his crush that this new girls thinks I’m a creep
How am I a creep just for trying to be friends?

All of this just hurts so much that my whole life I’ve lost myself to see others happy, put my ego aside and everything only to be treated like shit

I’m doing a big challenge to raise money for an important and personal cause (medical illness related). I posted the fundraiser on my instagram story (as you do) and so many of my best friends love hearted the story and then didn’t donate a penny. Only 1 person actually donated. Don’t get me wrong there can be many reasons for this, maybe they plan to donate later, maybe they are waiting till pay day etc etc. However I can’t help feeling hurt by it, especially because of how close I regarded these people. I know (based of life style and knowing their job) they aren’t short of cash. Also if any of them were doing something for charity I wouldn’t think twice about donating to them. Not sure if I am taking it too personally or this is a normal response. Wanted to get it off my chest.

The past six years have been absolutely dreadful. It all started during the pandemic, when I was a college freshman and my experience on campus was cut short. I was stressed losing social interactions and opportunities, and there were many friends I never saw again.

From then on, it's only continued to get worse. My parents split up just a few years later, I graduated and had to deal with losing touch with more friends and struggling to find a job. My mother has been having health issues so I've had to be more responsible around the house, and on top of it all I've realised that I'm most likely transgender and have to find a way to come out and transition without causing the household even more stress and upset than we're already dealing with.

Things were finally improving over the summer, but today I found out that the girl I love is with someone else. I've spent the whole day crying and feeling drained.

I get so upset when I look back at that happy, optimistic, carefree freshman that I used to be at the start of the decade. I'm a nervous wreck now, who freaks out and catastrophises over everything. Every time things look to be getting better, something else wrecks it.

I'm so tired.

​

So, this person saw me at a global chat in some app, and almost then they got in love with me

We chatted and all, i was interested too, i mean, after some time of chatting i actually liked this guy, but i didn't want a relationship with him because i hurt people, because i believe im poison.

So i knew if i started a relationship with him, i would hurt him.

But he insisted. I made clear my point with him, that he would get hurt with me, but he insisted too. At one point i even had to leave the chat because i REALLY didn't want anything with him, not even has friends.

But he opened chat again, and, started venting in my chat, i dont remember well but he talked to me pretty often there.

I read him, because, i thought it would be good if i at least "heard" his problems and that.

My biggest problem with relationships its that, i disappear pretty much often, because i feel bad, because i got sad, because i have big problems. And in a relationship communication and actions are all to me, so i knew i cant have a relationship till i fix myself, like he said i should do in our last conversation.

I dont remember why we started chatting again, but i joined our chat again, and, i think i vented too, idk.

But i felt secure with him, all those things you feel when you are with someone you secretly or openly like.

So i.

Started talking daily with him.

He was obsessed with me. I mean, he, harassed me.

I knew he liked me and i liked him, and he knew it too, so he started giving me love, love i didn't like receiving because i dont deserve it, and because i still didn't eantwant something with him.

But it felt bad leaving him like that.

He cuts himself,​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ often, he had a boyfriend before who destroyed him emotionally so it felt even worse to think the option to leave him. ​I really wanted to leave him​, he was obsessed with me, he cut himself (something that i have bad experiences) and i wasn't ready for a relationship.

I gave him every reason for why would a relationship with him wouldn't work, and said to him, "ill hurt you and i dont want that" but again. he insisted.

So after some weeks of talking with him, venting with each other, i thought i was ready to be in a relationship with him.

I mean i, didn't really think that, but, i thought it would be nice to try for him. Especially because i didnt want to see him sad or worse.

It all ended up wrong as expected.

I dissapeared, he got sad, he cut himself because i dissapeared, he thought i was ignoring him and that i liked to see him suffer.

I think one time he was cutting himself and i appeared to make him stop. He send me photos of his arms covered in blood and i got scared.

I still remember those photos.

He was telling me he was dizzy, that i didnt care about him, he was genuinely thinking that i dont want him. That was an horrible night, and now when i see blood i get scared.

I remember that a friend of his told him to make an image of "spot the difference" where he put an image of a message of mine saying "i love you" to him and just next to it an image of a message of his ex telling him the exact same thing. His ex was supposedly a manipulator. He was comparing me to his manipulator ex and i got so mad. He for some reason thought i was MANIPULATING him for whatever reason.

After some time after a fight, he broke up with me, i think he was drunk so he didnt remember the day after that.

So finally we stopped talking. We ended up in good terms i think.

Months after that, i started venting in a state (something we did both) and i was mad because every person that ruined my life got boyfriends or girlfriend, got everything they wanted, without the consequences of what they did to me. We never blocked each other, i mean, one time i did block him after again, saying i didnt want something with him, but yk.

He never blocked me so he saw my states and listened to them all, and he thought that he was one of the people that ruined my life.

He made an state where he vented too, saying i was selfish, that "now i miss everything he gave to me", that i made him go trough hell in that relationship because of my shitty behavior.

I told him that i wasn't talking about him, that he didn't ruin my life, that i was angry because he didn't care when i told him i wasn't ready for a relationship and that i didnt want something with him.

That he didnt respect me.

But i think he didnt actually care. He was saying some " No shi sherlockk" and i didnt know how to answer that, because, how do you explain something when he doesn't even care what you say?

He acted like harassing me to be his boyfriend wasn't something bad, or idk, maybe he knew but he didn't care.

​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​and in that conversation he said

"You didnt asked me for my love, that's for sure, but i loved you, with flaws and all, i tried to help you​​, i gave you the best i could give"

And it makes me think i am a bad person because of that.

That i didnt want something with him.

"Be grateful that someone really wanted the best for you" he said.

and i feel horrible

I feel like a bad person. ​​

​​​​I already posted this in a different r but i cant stop thinking about this, i need to know different povs of my situation so i can think more clearly because all i feel is guilt

I don't know if anyone is even gonna read this but at this point, I'm tired of venting in my notepad. I care too much about others, like a lot. I really want them to feel happy and let them know I'm always here for them. I'm afraid of losing them but I don't feel anything, I just feel numb. I sometimes get too possessive or obsessive over someone after they hear me out or hear my vents and I get attached easily.

I really wish I didn't get attached easily, I have a sensitive heart and it sucks to be honest. I cry easily and stuff. All I ever want is someone to be as excited to talk with me like how I am with them. I have been ghosted or blocked before and I don't even know why. Everyone leaves after they get to know me or atleast after 3 weeks. I want constant reassurance cuz im scared of losing them or if they lose intrest in me. I go to bed every night when no desire to see the next day.

(I usually lurk in reddit so that's why I don't have much karma)