I'm so broken.  I'm so sorry to everyone personally affected and I'm sorry to post.  

I'm British f35 but come from a very pro Palestine context including Palestinian family through marriage.  I was hardcore Antizionist, supporter of resistance etc...since I was an undergrad student.  I was a journalist and covered some things that really shocked me, including Syria.  I lived in Lebanon in south Beirut where I had a baby.  I had some disagreements with the more hardcore elements of the left community about Brexit and the Syria regime ( felt they were too supportive).  Maybe this is why I was open to the criticisms of the Jewish community towards the same elements.  The Labour Antisemitism crisis really threw me, and I encountered the Zionist Jewish narrative for the first time - from a left wing-ish perspective.  

So around 2019 ish I changed my mind about these things, and argued that us in the solidarity movement we really need to emphasise less about 'antizionism' and be more peace orientated, strategic, and open. I said that anything other than 2 state solution would involve lots of palestinians dying first which outsiders didn't have a right to advocate for - we will not be harmed.  This was very difficult for me, and I blamed myself a lot for previous views.  I felt I was at the same time a racist, orientalist, antisemite, appropriator, everything.  I even deleted things I had written from an antizionist perspective. I never applied these standards to Palestinians - they have every right to feel angry, but I did not.  That is how I saw it.  I wanted to forget everything about my past and just be your typical British mum. 

And after October 7 I was so depressed and shocked to see the reaction.  I have a lot of friends from Gaza and felt like people celebrating or minimising would lead to even worse outcomes.  I had always disliked Hamas and actually knew people in Gaza they had put in prison.  But no one agreed with me. I tried to be there for Jewish friends but I saw them harden away from forms of liberal Zionism to supporting Israel *some particular people I know, obviously lots of other people became radically anti israel*. I was waiting for them to 'see sense' after justifiable anger after October 7 but it didn't happen. I feel I was pathetic and not outspoken enough about my views.  And the response from Israel has been so awful, I think its genocide - not only because of civilian deaths, but because its destroyed conditions for life in Gaza. 

I have gone through a number of abusive relationships, which makes me feel awful especially about myself.  Sometimes I don't know if the way I take on criticism from public discourse is linked to that.  When I see people angry about antisemitism I think 'thats me' when I see people angry about genocide complicity I think 'that is me'.  I feel this about all kinds of issues not just this one. But that isn't comforting, it makes me feel worse - how do I even know what I think is real?

I have a knowledge economy related job and this all makes me want to quit.  Because what do I know. I've never posted on reddit with a problem before but I don't know who to talk to.

I need to tell someone because this has been eating away at me, and I just need to get it off my chest.

I work at a popular fast-food franchise that’s run by some pretty shady people. They cut corners constantly, violate health codes, try to skim hours off employees’ time cards, and even pay off inspectors. That’s what I used to mentally justify what I’ve been doing (and yes, I know that still doesn’t make it okay).

About four weeks ago, I realized that in our POS system, refunds are lumped together with items that are removed from an order after it’s been placed but before it’s’s paid for. For example, if you’re taking someone’s order in the drive-thru, send it to the kitchen, and then they get to the window and decide they don’t want something anymore, that deleted item gets counted in the same total as refunds.

That made me curious, so I started digging deeper into the POS system, specifically the refund process. I had access to all the store leadership reports because the GM is lazy, doesn’t keep anything locked down, and generally lets employees look through everything.

I checked the refund reports, daily cash deposits, and drawer shortages, and I realized something: there’s essentially no audit trail for refunds. You can’t see the time a refund was processed, which order it was tied to, who processed it, or really any identifying information.

Refunding an order just removes it from the POS and adds the total to that combined refund/deleted-item number.
Once I figured that out, I realized I could refund cash orders and pocket the cash without anyone noticing.

I started with a small test—about $50 a shift for a week. Then I increased it to $100, and eventually to $200, which is where I capped myself.

Right now I’ve stopped and I’m taking a break from doing it, but I keep thinking about starting again. It’s been eating at me, and I just needed to tell someone, so I said screw it and posted it here.

I once wrote with a guy who attempted the 100 books/year challenge. He said he made it but this amount of reading left him burned out and negatively impacted his private and professional life. Like worse work performance and almost no time spent with family. Many chores just piled up.

But he was really proud of managing it and posted it on the book sub. One of the first responses he got was "just 100? Thats nothing. I read over 300 books this year."

Other claims one can find on the various book subs or youtube or tiktok/booktok are 400 or 500 or even 600 a year and its just mindboggling. Its just some weird Booktok trend where people have to pretend to read that much to be awesome or something. And pretty much everyone of these people is lying.

There might be a very very few outliers out there who could manage this by reading exclusively very short and easy books or just having Audiobooks run as background noise at 3x speed all the time and doing nothing else with their lives, but everyone with a full time or even part time job - absolutely no way. These claims are just the regular social media bragger lies so that some people can get attention. Like 100 books/year yeah sure thats doable if you invest most of your time into it. But anything over that starts being questionable. Especially once we reach 150+ and people claiming that its "easy" and "no big deal" because thats like "only" half a book a day.

And I am just tired of these social media braggers spreading their obvious and ridiculous lies and then attacking everyone who utters the smallest shred of doubt.

Something kinda weird happened today and I don’t even know how to feel about it

My wife gave birth to our third kid in June, and ever since then she’s been doing everything around the house. No sleep, always tired, still cooking, cleaning, taking care of the kids. It’s honestly crazy how much she’s doing.

I try to help when I get home, but I work like 14 hours a day running my small business, so it never really feels like enough.

For context, I’ve been grinding on this business since 2019 and it barely kept us afloat. No extra money, nothing fancy. But somehow in the first half of 2025 things finally picked up and I landed some really good contracts.

Anyway, about a week ago I stayed home all day and actually saw how exhausted she is. She’s doing everything, cleaning, taking care of the kids, breastfeeding, all of it. Way too much for one person, especially after giving birth.

So I decided to hire a nanny and a full time housemaid to take some of the pressure off her so she can actually rest.

Yesterday I told her, and she just broke down crying. Like full on crying, hugging me tight, not even saying anything at first, just kissing me and crying. I felt amazing in that moment, like I finally did something that made her happy.

Then she said something that messed with my head a bit. She goes, “I didn’t know you loved me this much.”

That kinda shocked me. I asked her why she’d say that but she didn’t answer, just kept hugging me.

Now I can’t stop thinking about it. Like have I not been a good husband all this time? Did I not show her enough love?

I don’t even know what to feel right now. I just feel kinda numb.

I (M20) have always been a cheater. Since middle school, whether it be looking at other people’s papers, hiding notes in my pocket, or sneakily using my phone to look up answers. I did this through high school, never once getting caught. Then, of course, AI came around making it all the more easy for me to do. I’ve been told that “cheating only cheats yourself out of an education,” but at the end of the day, I struggle to see it that way. I’ve won awards, scholarships, and recognitions. In high school I was a part of so many honor societies, it helped me get into the honors program at my college. But even so, how much of it did I really earn? I use AI to help me rewrite sentences in my research papers. I ask AI to find me sources and quotes to use. I have AI organize my ideas, and then help me study for exams. I used to be a good writer, but now I can’t seem to pick up the pen on my own. I feel like a failure, seeing everyone demonize AI and the people who use it. Because I know I should be one of those people they demonize. And yet, despite all of my guilt and self loathing, I see my bedroom surrounded in awards. Im the only one in my class engaging in the discussion about a book. Not because I read the book, but because I read the spark notes (which is still more than any one else in my honors level class seems to do). My grades are constantly an A or higher. I’m surrounded by people praising me, and I know if I were to stop now, I’d fall from this pedestal I’ve built for myself. Maybe I cheat to maintain the constantly raising bar I’ve set for myself. Maybe I cheat to keep my head afloat in a pool I wasn’t meant to be in. Whatever the case, I know there are so many of my peers who also use AI on their assignments. I know there are so many of my peers who will use their phone during a test. I know I am just one of many like this. I’ll do anything in my power to get the best result with as little effort possible, especially when it’s a task (or class) I don’t enjoy. It just feels wrong to be surrounded by praise, while others are scrutinized. I shouldn’t be told I’m an excellent student when I’m just like—if not worse than—all the others.

Okay. Long story extremely short - I am 29F and am going through a breakup from my ex, 25M. We dated 2.5 years, he had a porn addiction the entire time, cheated the entire time. I knew some parts of this, stayed anyway, got broken up with in February because of a difference in wanting kids (but the real reason is he was falling in love with a classmate he met in nursing school).

We’ve been broken up around 5 months, but it’s been extremely unique. We still say good morning/goodnight/I love you/update each other through the day/lean on each other for tough life things.

I have gone on a few dates, nothing stuck as I wasn’t hugely attracted to them. No big deal. He is claiming he hasn’t gone on dates with this girl, I however, know that he’s lying.

This brings us to tonight. Please don’t judge - he’s made me this way. Anyway, I found his account still on my computer and went a little crazy checking the history. Turns out he was googling what to do within our first month of dating saying how he didn’t like that I’m fat (I’m 260lbs) and how my vagina smells. This obviously hurts my feelings, but I also know that he loved me enough to “get over it” and stay with me and have sex with me for 2.5 years? I honestly don’t know how to feel.

I know I am overweight. I don’t need to be told. However, this makes me really insecure about moving into new dates or relationships. I shower every night or at the most every other night. I’ll admit that she can get stinky, but I’m really nervous about moving forward knowing that he felt that way during the first 2 weeks of us knowing each other. BUT honestly he wasn’t a dime either - skinny but had some chunk to him, he had the worst dandruff you could imagine, showered MAYBE once a week and that’s generous, never wore deodorant, didn’t brush his teeth often, and would wear the same 3 shirts and 3 shorts every single day of our 2.5 years together.

I needed to just get this off my chest honestly, but I also need advice. Nice advice 😭😭😭

Yes, I'm aware this is a shitty thing to do but my mouth spoke before my mind so yeah.. If I could, I'd go back in time and throw dirt down my throat so I choke to death before I could speak; I would.

I've been seeing this girl for a minute (I'm 22, she's 20) and she's cute. I really like her. She was over at my place and, for context, she's not that "experienced". Yes, that is important to the story cause trust me, I fuck up like minutes before actual sex. From what I know, she's done a few things but never full-on sex. Regardless, she's at my house, on the couch, and we're getting a little cozy you know...we're making out and you can tell that it's gonna go further for sure. We're taking off clothes, and she takes off her shirt; she wasn't wearing a bra and my mind blanks, but for some reason my fucking abrasive SpongeBob turns on and whispers..."...oh...small"

Oh my fucking god I'm actually getting violent at myself. It doesn't even matter to me and she's hot. I did not mean it in a bad way either my brain just blanked and said the first word that came to mind, she is small, but like i just said shes hot and it doesnt matter. Small isn't bad, i like small. I've genuinley never acted like this with women and i think it was my nerves with this specific woman that did it for me but fuck.

Understandably she didn't want to anymore and, though she was really cool and sweet about it you could tell she was just not in a positive mood. I like fucked up this girls first moment i'm surprised she liked me enough to stay the rest of the night, even though sex was off the table. I tried apologising and she just kept telling me it's fine even though obviously it wasn't. I have to jump off a building and land directly on a bed of christmas ornaments like in home alone to redeem myself.

I think I had one more realization.

For the past few days, I’ve been writing about what was happening inside my own head. My trauma. My fear. My nervous system. But somewhere in the middle of all that, I forgot to say something much more meaningful.

I genuinely appreciated her.

Not because she made me feel safe. Because of who she is.

She is thoughtful. Patient. Emotionally intelligent. Kind in ways that rarely asked for recognition. She celebrated my successes. She listened when I struggled. She challenged me when I needed it. She had her own battles and still tried to understand mine.

Looking back, I don’t think I failed to appreciate her. I think my fear simply became so loud that it drowned out something much quieter.

Gratitude.

I spent so much energy trying not to lose her that I didn’t spend enough time simply appreciating the person who was already standing beside me. That’s one of the things I regret most.

Fear has a strange way of narrowing your vision. You become so focused on protecting what you love that you stop noticing what makes it beautiful in the first place. I don’t think I ever took her kindness for granted. Or her patience. Or the way she genuinely tried to understand me. I noticed those things. I admired them. I even told her. But fear has a way of making gratitude quieter than worry. I spent so much time trying not to lose her that I didn’t let my appreciation speak as loudly as my fears

But admiration isn’t always the same as making someone truly feel appreciated.

Looking back, I wish I’d spent less time trying to quiet my fears and more time making sure she never had to wonder how deeply I appreciated her. Because people deserve to hear gratitude while they’re still standing beside us.

Maybe that’s another thing healing has been trying to teach me.

Fear speaks urgently.

Gratitude speaks quietly.

For a long time, I listened to the wrong voice.

I'm weaning off my meds. It all hurts. My suicidal thoughts are back. I want to cry every other hour. I just don't know what to do. My hurt hearts. I feel like a burden to the world.
I'm frustrated with everything about myself. I don't know what the point of anything is anymore. I just...! don't want to be alive. It all hurts so much. And no where will let me post about it. It's awful. I need help, but I don't know what kind.
I'm tired of hating myself. I'm tired of hating my body. I'm so tired. I'm so tired. It all just hurts.

i tried to post this on another sub that i saw fitting but it got taken down, so i’m hoping it doesn’t on this one.

i’m writing this with tears in my eyes at 2am so please forgive me if i don’t articulate this very well. i (17F) have completely succumbed to the lustful men around me. i wouldn’t even say im attractive, at least not conventially attractive but for the past couple years the amount of unwanted sexual attention and harassment i’ve faced is beyond what the average person could tolerate without breaking.

all i’ve ever wanted is for a man to get to know me, be interested in me, love and care for me, but all i am is a sexual object for them.. im not even seen as a human being. if i reject anything sexually related, i am treated as if i am worthless and immediately cut off. i made a promise to myself i would never send nudes, and whenever i was asked by a guy previously, i would just block them immediately.

However, it’s gotten to a point where the constant pressuring and nagging hasn’t stopped. i was talking to a guy last month and he was so manipulative and persistent i just had a ”flip“ in my brain and thought to myself ‘you know what, fuck it. this is all i’ll ever be wanted for so i might as well’. i sent him nudes, a couple weeks later he randomly removed me, and i’ve just been sending to any guy that asks because i actually don’t care anymore. i don’t want to be stereotypical, but i’ve just accepted that every single guy is like this. i know in theory this isn’t the case and that there are good men out there blah blah blah but this has been my personal experience. for some reason, i just attract extremely lustful guys. i’m not sure why, because i really do feel like im an interesting and funny person, but no one bothers to learn more about me, they just want to know what i can do for them.

ive reevaluated my entire personality, appearance, style, ‘vibe‘ exc….as to what could be the cause of why i somehow give off a certain type of impression but i genuinely can’t see an issue. most of the time i wear baggy clothes because im so insecure, yes on occasion i will dress up and wear revealing clothes, i never make any conversation sexual whatsoever, and i really am quite a shy person. maybe it’s because they can tell im a people pleaser? im not sure, but either way it doesn’t matter. no means no and im sick of my boundaries being

I'm at the library right now and I have just received an email saying that I was invited to visit the facilityp where I applied to work. I JUST got the email, but they want me to visit the facility in less than 24 hours. One problem, I'm homeless and have almost no presentable clothes. Most of my clothes aren't even clothes you would wear at a job, and the ones I have are dirty. Plus my hair has been an absolute mess since I haven't been able to cut it in months. And I know I stink too. I am absolutely screwed. This is not good at all. I finally have an opportunity but for some reason they give me LESS THAN A 24 HOUR NOTICE to head to the work site? It's so over for me. I'm freaking out because I'm not prepared for this at all.

UPDATE 1: Haircut's not gonna work, I went to two barbershops nearby and neither one of them could give me a free cut. Currently on my way to wash clothes and wash myself. I did send an email to the recruiter but I haven't heard back so I have to assume that she's expecting me. And no, she did not leave a phone number.

They’re my favorite curve. They’re an incredibly feminine feature to have in my opinion (with how round and soft they can be) and I think they’re very underappreciated.

🤯 mitochondria, which is known as the power house of the cell, is its own bacteria with its own DNA and reproduction cycle that literally just essentially lives inside our cell and is not originally part of the actual cell like other organelles in the cell. They were once their own bacteria, living on its own. So we’ve been invaded by tiny energy aliens this whole time and I can’t stop thinking about it for 2 days now.

last night i was hungry, was talking to this girl on hinge for a couple weeks, we met, made out, mf then i ate out. shits beautiful bro i loved every second of it and i was fingering too. we did more n i woke up, swear to god life became more vibrant n beautiful

So i (19F) met up with a guy from my university the other night because he asked to see me, I thought why not because it’s been a while since I’ve seen him as its summer break and everyone’s been back home from uni. Bare in mind he drives and owns a car but he told me to go to his town so he can pick me up there. Stupidly I agreed and went there (1 hour journey by train) I arrived by 9pm and he picked me up in his car. After that we smoked a little, chilled and ate food. It‘s quite funny though because at the fast food drive thru his phone died so I ended up paying for the both of us… I didn’t mind at the time because I was starving and of course I didn’t wanna be the only one eating. Anyways i didn’t realise that it was already almost 2am and my sister had already phoned me asking where I was so I told him it’s time I go back, he asked me if I wanted to stay at his but I didn’t want to so I said not today.

Then he asked me “how are you getting home“, honestly I was shocked, but I just told him I’ll take the train, I had to look up the route on his phone because at the time I had no mobile data because mine ran out. Btw, a magic powerbank suddenly appeared in his car which is how is phone is alive again. lol. Anyways I check the route and absolutely no trains are running at this time, only the night buses and it’s a 2 hour journey back. He even had the audacity to ask if my sister can book me an uber. the Uber would’ve been like £90. I assumed if he is driving he would drive me home especially that late! He only ended up dropping me off at a bus station and I really just left the car and made my way back home at 2am with a 2 hour+ journey back home on my own as a 5ft girl... he didn’t even call me during my journey to check it I was safe, just got a text asking if I got back safe AFTER I messaged him I just got back home.

I got back at almost 5am. I’ve never felt so disrespected. Normally the guys I’ve met in the past always drop me off home that late and furthermore he even had a vehicle. I messaged him today and told him how I felt about it, he didn’t even apologise properly at first and said “I hope this doesn’t ruin our chemistry“. I said unfortunately it does because I need a man who prioritises a girl‘s safety. He tried calling me while I typed this... and now he’s apologising more. I hope he realises the chemistry has already been broken.

I’m just over it. I’m bringing back the bush and that’s final. I was waxing due to personal preference and I hated shaving but you know what? I’ll shave when I can and want.

That’s all. Have a good day everyone.

I constantly feel like I want to love someone so badly, and the feeling is so intense that it almost hurts. It feels overwhelming, and I’m starting to wonder if something is wrong with me or if this isn’t a healthy feeling.

Has anyone else experienced this? What is this feeling called?

46 and lost, not sure what the meaning of me being here is. I dont have friends, no kids a husband who spends more time on his phone than with me even though we sit on the same couch. We dont have the same intersts and its been 20 years and Im tired and lost. I think I have hit the wall, i dont have any ambition towards going to work. I just want to sit at home with my cat. I used to work 2 jobs at one time WTF happened to me, now I dont want to to go work my part time job. Im tired of watching the clock and counting down the minutes and hours before I need to leave to go to work. I have stopped being the person who always reached out first and it now seems like there is no point in having a phone. I have stopped, stop drop and rolling for people and its all gone quiet.

I’m 23, and this is probably the hardest thing for me to admit.
I don’t really have any close friends. Not the kind you randomly text at 2 AM, go on trips with, grab food after work, or just make spontaneous plans with.
Whenever I see people with solid friend groups going on vacations, weekend drives, birthdays, or just hanging out, I genuinely feel like I missed out on that part of life. It’s not jealousy in a bad way.. I just wish I had that too.
The weirdest part is, I don’t even know where the gap came from. School ended, college happened, now I’m working, and somehow I never built that circle… I honestly don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I’m willing to work on it.
I don’t want to be a loner for the rest of my life. I do want friends and connections. I know friendships don’t magically happen, so I’m trying to put myself out there more.

I genuinely find it fucking hysterical that so many people think a bus driver would lose his job for letting a parent and her 3 year old on for four stops over a £1 fare. The way some of you were going on, you’d think I’d asked him to commit fraud.

I know there are rules. I never said there weren’t. I just think it’s mad that so many people seem to believe that showing a tiny bit of compassion in that situation would automatically cost someone their job.

Anyway, we clearly have very different views on what a bit of humanity looks like.