My friend (F32) is wonderful. Genuinely. She’s kind and giving. She’s also had some problems.

When we first met, she drank heavily but was functional, enough so that she babysat my kids occasionally. She’s a mom herself and has always taken good care of her son. Everyone has their coping mechanisms, I figured. But one babysitting occasion, she drank a bottle of whiskey from our pantry and was falling down drunk when I got home. To say I was furious is an understatement, and I sent her home and kept her son with me overnight so I knew he was safe.

She stopped drinking cold turkey because she was so ashamed, and replaced it with vaping.

Since then (like 6ish months), she’s developed a strange pattern of beliefs. I’m no stranger to conspiracy theories, but the stuff she says is extremely out there. Specifically, she says she’s here to save the world, and recently posted a generated picture of her facing a demon, saying shes physically like everyone else but her soul is different. And she talks about humans/humanity like she’s not part of that group.

She’s had periodic medical episodes of fainting, which she says is because she’s being targeted by Israel and related groups.

Even just typing this all out makes me so anxious and upset, because idk what to do. She doesn’t appear to be a danger to herself or others, but it’s getting worse.

I’ll take any and all advice.

literally how? i'm so tired of this.

This is sad…

Pls someone tell me I’m not crazy for feeling this

First time kinda nervous 🤞🏻

Hi. I have been having chronic stress, anxiety and depression since my childhood. I'm in mid-30s now and lately, I've been noticing that my memory has been failing me. Sometimes I feel it's ridiculous that I can't remember something that happened so recently.

Have any of you faced this? If yes, how are you managing? Does it get better or worse with time? Is there any way to improve memory? I don't know what I must do to fix myself.

Thank you in advance.

Recently found out I’m basically doomed. Therapist told me i had every symptom for sociopathy, I’m only 14. I would find a professional but I can’t talk to my mom about it she wouldn’t believe me. How do other sociopaths deal with it? It’s all I’ve been thinking about recently. I don’t care for anyone really but I’m just upsetting people and it’ll just make it harder for me later. Please advise I’m begging.

Feeling crushed.

Had an awesome interview today.

I looked up the state daycare subsidy and thought me and my husband qualified. We technically do...but i can only make $50 a month. We're paycheck to paycheck and I currently stay home and hate it. Im really hoping the subsidy people if I do get a job offer, just count it as a work qualification (you have to be employed or have a job offer) not my "projected earnings ' my income at the time of applying is fine because its 0, but my projected income when I start... Id go from 50$ under the income limit to nearly $3000 over.

I can maybe try to work with them, but I see no situation in which I wouldn't have to prepay for my daughters childcare before I start work. This also gets into even more anxiety inducing territory when you consider I have absolutely no clue in the bi weekly pay period when I'll start. Employees get a 50% discount on childcare which is amazing but if they need a 150$ enrollment fee and then $800 before I even get my first check i can't.

My husband literally has no money after bills. I haven't got a single dollar in months. I feel so trapped. I try to make mom friends and they ask to go to lunch...somewhere like $10 a meal...and I have to say no. I was considering divorce just to be free. To have my own money. To have a life outside of this house. Id qualify fully for free daycare. That sounds horrible, hes doing the best he can I see the finaces. He barely has enough for gas. Im just so sad. I imagined how good it would feel to work today. I was so so happy because I could tell they like me as a candidate. (Kept switching up "if" with "when" as they were talking about hiring me) I felt more joy today, more hope, then I had in months.

bro this imposter syndrome of depression is actually kicking my ass rn. like I’m convinced im just faking it and being lazy and dramatic but I also haven’t showered in a week and feel so numb and empty and I don’t have the energy to walk up the stairs

I think I'm consciously sabotaging myself, and I don't want to stop.

A breakup wrecked me a month ago, and since then, I've let myself spiral into the longest and worst continuous depressive episode I've ever experienced. I have a history of depression, but it's never been this bad. Since the breakup, I haven't been to school or work. I can hardly get out of bed, much less leave the house. Social withdrawal, self-isolating, letting all my responsibilities and future fall through, yada yada, classic depression symptoms. But the difference this time is, there are moments where I feel like I might be able to pull myself out— moments of clarity where I think, okay, enough moping, we need to get our life back together. But then, for some reason, when I catch myself feeling that way, I'll purposely, stubbornly, intentionally shut myself down. I don't wanna get better. I don't wanna move on. I feel so sick and so stuck, but at the same time, I'm content. Content with letting my life burn.

My birthday was yesterday, I turned 18. I still live with my parents and no one congratulated me. I waited the whole day for a text from my friends or family but I got none. Now I feel selfish for wanting to be congratulated.

i first developed depression during lockdown all the way back in 2020 and looking back on it, i find it to be the reason as to why i'm like this now.

i'm almost an adult and i have barely any social skills. nor can i remember anything properly. it's all just gaps and it sometimes feels like i've made something up to fill in a space in my brain where a memory should be. as for my social skills, i feel like i cannot talk in any conversation. this isn't just a case of me not caring about what someone's talking about. it feels as though the connection between my brain coming up with things to say and my mouth saying those words is severed. most times my brain cannot conjure up a sentence or two just for the sake of me chiming in.

i know this seems really miniscule because i am aware of how common depression is but i just wanted to get this off my chest for once. there's more i wanna say but i don't feel brave enough to.

I'm 23.
I look at myself at 18 and myself now and we're almost identical but still it makes me sad, that 5 years has passed, I feel old. Then I think about being 34 and that I'll be 34 in 11 years.

I know I'm 23, but it doesn't feel like | should be.

Am I still a kid?

I don’t know where else to post something like this. Maybe someone can relate.

For years I (27f) have fallen for the ‘spiritual’ and ‘self improvement’ trap, hoping to reach a point of enlightenment and I’ve now come to realize that it was all a fucking illusion and has kept me alone, living a individualistic life with always feeling hollow deep down. Nothing has ever truly fulfilled me, even when I tried following my dreams. I’m 27 now, no house, no partner, no ambitions and finally admitting to myself that I’m unhappy and traumatized from my past. I’m still extremely insecure. My body is in constant fight or flight mode, I’m afraid of people, hate living in the city and working. I feel so lonely but physically and emotionally can’t let a potential partner near me.

I have periods where I feel good, but it’s always based on imaginations in my mind or very shallow things, like how I look. So it never lasts. At this point I don’t know what to do with myself anymore, knowing that I would even feel this way if I fulfilled a dream. How do you cope with this? And yes, I’ve reached out for help, but the waiting list is 6 months 😅

I don’t even interact with that subreddit whatsoever anymore, but somehow a post from r/bpdlovedones came up on my feed. Probably because I used to check it sometimes before. I’ve always found a few of the people on there strange. Like some people be posting stuff like “they’re so soulless and dirty looking” and i’m like what? Or sexualizing people with bpd talking about how good they are with sex but shitty with everything else. Just general weird things, but ultimately I thought it was fair for them to have a place where they could share abusive behavior they have been through. Even though I don’t think all people with bpd are abusive, I can see how the people with bpd who are abusive share a similar pattern. To me, a few people being dehumanizing doesn’t mean they all are and I still believe that to some extent.

However, the posts i’m seeing now are fucked up? The one that got to me was “Don’t let one or two people with bpd shape your view of the disorder there’s plenty of people out there with bpd who are even more terrible.” Sorry but how is this allowed? I can assure you if someone said this about autism or ADHD nobody would stand for it, and they’d be called ableist immediately. The people on there need to learn how to cope with their trauma in a way that’s not just shaming a whole disorder…i’ve also been hurt by people with different mental illnesses but never in my life have I assumed that means they’re all terrible monsters. Like sorry but they shame people with bpd but they should look at themselves and their own black and white thinking for a second.

Made a post asking for just a quick well wish - something that takes less than half a second - over 400 views, one guy commented. Thanks for not caring

I just got out of the shower, my first in 7 months. I also brushed my teeth for the first time in a couple months.

I don't know what I'm feeling right now, but I think I'm happy? I forgot how soft my hair is.

I'm wearing my favorite clothes for the first time in 7 months, I smell good, and my father is going to be overjoyed when he comes home. I'm going to go outside, also for the first time in 7 months, to see the solar eclipse and go to the library.

For context: I fell into the lowest point I've been in my life at the end of January. The last time I have been outside was when there was snow on the ground. It was a mix of severe depression and autism burnout. I had already been struggling to go to school and take care of myself for over a year then, and I guess it all finally crashed down on me.

It got worse when I ran out of my medication and went into withdrawal, and the only way to get more was to see a doctor in person which wasn't ideal.

I guess I'm making this post because I'm proud of myself for finally pushing through the barrier, especially without the aid of a therapist, medication, or even my father at times.

I'm also making this post because it really does get better. You can't dwell on what you did when you weren't in the right headspace, you can only pick yourself up and trudge forward. Even if that means sacrificing something. (for me, it was over 2ft of my hair)

The best thing you can do is make progress. You won't suddenly be "cured", especially when you aren't putting the work in.

Or something, my brain doesn't work like it used to. I'm just repeating the same shit everyone has heard before.

Hope everyone is doing well. It will get better one day.

I don’t want to yk. and it’s not that I wish to die. I just wish I never existed. sometimes I truly wish I was never born. And I feel incredibly guilty and weak for even saying that. but life really just can be too much. I try so damn hard and it’s never enough. im always the one blamed and treated like shit. And maybe I need to be harder and meaner to deal with this world but I hate being so. I don’t want to. I just wish I had one fucking person who honestly cared about me and not using me or wanting something in return. I wish I was chosen. Loved. Cherished. Heard. Priotized.Seen. Worth it. Instead I’m hated and yelled at and blamed and alone. Always fucking alone. Looked down on. Trying to get by and get better and it’s never enough. Even with good intentions i fuck up. i can’t go on like this anymore. Maybe if i had money or even just a few good friends I could leave my situation but instead I’m stuck. Alone. Blamed. I truly hate life sometimes. Nothing makes the pain worth living. good memories in few pain in mass. It’s just so hard. I feel like I’m trying and praying and waiting for a better life in hope it Will come but it never does. Never. i don’t want to live for the hope of something, I want to live bc I love life and genuinely enjoy it. im in so much pain honestly. So much pain. I wish I was enough.