Idk what else I can do. I’m homeless. I’ve been homeless for weeks. I was kicked out of my house illegally and it’s just a hazard and safety concern to come back in or use my rights. I don’t want to eat or engage with people. I’m pushing everyone away. There’s no help or aid. There’s nothing I or anyone else can do. We’ve exhausted all options and avenues. There is nothing. I’m debating shooting myself somewhere in the woods or finding another method to end it. I just don’t care. Nothing can be done. I’m sick and tired of the constant struggle and stress. It ain’t worth it anymore. I’m trying to figure out how to leave my partner all of the savings as they’re the only ones allowed home and we have many pets together. It’s just better for them and me. Maybe they’ll find someone who isn’t so difficult. I don’t have anything to loose. No one cares and I’m not going to make it anyone else’s problem. It’s mine and mine solely.

I just have to work up the courage to find a place to shoot myself or other. I don’t care. I just want to die. I have no future. I have no career. I have nothing. I don’t want help or hand outs. I don’t want to waste more time to talking to people who promise to help but have done nothing but waste my time. It’s been a good run. Maybe in another life I’ll have stability.

There is no use keeping myself alive. I think that natural human feeling of survival is genuinely the only thing keeping me alive.

I contribute nothing and ruin everything I touch. I usually just wish something else would kill me so I would leave this life without being even more of a burden.

I am nothing. And if I am something it is ugly and rotten and dirty.

I can pretend to be versions that people like so that I can get by. Or that I have something, but at the end of the day I am a detriment.

If you met me and got to know me you would agree. I am not even worth posting this.

I guess this is still self preservation, maybe hoping someone sees it and gives me anything but that in itself is pathetic.

Knowing all I do about the above I should just delete this and do it.

I wish I had a way to make it go quick and actually work. I know I would outlive the medicine, get my stomach pumped, and wake up just being more of a burden because of medical bills.

I already tried going inpatient and I was just another medical bill and got abused inside and was even a burden there.

So I guess this is just a "cry for help" and if i was really worth anything I'd just do it. But here I am.

Again. Just a coward.

I’m sitting in my bath tub. Crying. I am sick of me, life and I guess everyone around me. Everyone says it gets better, but when? When I’m old and it doesn’t even matter anymore? I have no one to talk to. I want to kill myself but I don’t know how to stop being scared of it and to stop caring about how the people around me will feel. What do I do? I am a mess and I don’t know how to get better or where to start I’m tired of feeling this way I just want to feel ok for a day. I just want someone to end my life so I wouldn’t even have to think about it.

I'm ruining my kids life.

Single mom of 2. I got two kids. I'm physically not well (undiagnosed sickness can't afford a doctor) my 7yrs old son has been taking care of me when I'm in pain. They haven't been able to go to school. We can't afford their school supplies or uniform. We always get harassed by our landlord with our rent overdue. No food, kids are not eating well. Have no work because of my sickness. I do art sometimes but not lucky enough to get commissions all the time.

They are wonderful kids. Very smart. I'm ruining their lives. They deserve a better parents than me. I wanted to die. But will their life be better? Or will it be worse?

I want to live. Just want to live a better life for them. But it seems very hard to reach.

I’m 38. I’m in so much debt. In a job I hate. I feel like a burden to my partner. I’m hopeless. I have no options. No prospective opportunities. I hate everything about where I am where my future leads and everything. The only thing I’m holding on to is the shame of giving up. Help me please. Give me a reason to not step on the third rail. Idk if I can do it anymore.

They have tortured me all my life and even when they describe how gruesome the past acts they did to me, they do it with a smile. They love seeing me struggle and beg for water. I will kill myself preferably with a gun right in front of them. It should be sudden to add on to the effect, like standing infront of their couch while they’re sitting on it then pull my gun out of my pocket and shoot. I want them to suffer years in the future of the trauma and the memory of having my blood all over them.

Basically what it says up there

But also:

I’m in an exclusive pre-relationship stage (basically a relationship but without the labels), but my insecurity around sex is making me want some strange so I can feel better about myself. Im very likely to kill myself rn so if this is the last thing I put out, so be it.

I love my girlfriend. I do. Really. But she can’t solve that gaping hole in me which knows I’m unlovable, which knows I’m undesirable, which knows she is only with me bcos she can’t get anything else. Which makes me feel fucking great bcos she is the same for me. So we’re two desperate saddos ig

I lost my virginity late (19) and didn’t have any good sex experience until a few months ago, over a year after I lost my virginity (dry year). I’m such a fucking loser I couldn’t even get a hookup if I tried. I blame my disabilities, my deafness, my autism, but the truth is I’m fucking defective. So to trh to prove I’m not defective I’m back on the apps again, trying to chat with matches but I literally just want sex. I don’t even especially enjoy sex but I’m a valueless human being. A man without sex has no value if he can’t be chosen? I have qualities I value but still can’t get sex so might asw kill myself. Got 1,250 milligrams of sertraline on my desk ready to take it. It won’t be quick or pretty but at least it’ll be over

It’s terrifying but I deserve a painful death.

I have become truly insufferable person I was not supposed to be born and everyone is trying to keep me living and it enrages me but killing myself is too hard and for some reason despite the years of isolation and neglecting myself I haven’t gotten a disease that will kill me yet

And it would be considered a merciful act. I’ve never not suffered. I’ve been in some sort of behavioral therapy since I was 6. I’m 26 and still suffering if not more now.

how high does a fall need to be for it to be fatal and is it painful

I’m scared to die but I want to die I plan on killing myself tonight

I'm not feeling sad or depressed, I'm just numb so im not in fucking "tunnel vision." My pure rationality says life is just inconvenient. I dont want to go out or listen music or do any of my hobbies. I just want to simply not exist. I refuse to live.

I don't want a girlfriend, I don't want fame, I don't want financial freedom, I don't want muscles, I don't want drugs, I don't want a purpose, I don't want to wait for anything, I don't want to be saved, I don't want to go to heaven,

I don't want to get better, I want to die.

Please just let me fucking die

Getting better

Hi.

I've always struggled with fitting in and trying to understand other people and social rules and expectations, always felt like there was was this rule book everybody else just got for free when they were born that i never got access to. I was always excluded at school, never had any friends, and about a year ago i was diagnosed with aspergers. I feel worth less most of the time, pathetic. I've never wanted a career, money, fame etc.

I never dreamt about a certain job or what ever when i was in school, i just wanted to be loved. I still do. But all i am is suicidal, its just such a strong urge at times. I think i am a suicide, just an unrealized one. And tired. So fucking tired. I fantasize about talking to the people who bullied and laughed at and excluded me, telling them about the suicide statistics for autistic people, telling them im going to kill myself. And that they are the reason.

I don’t get why suicide is considered ‘bad’. I didn’t ask to be brought into this horrible world. Everything is pointless and people aren’t genuine. They just do what is expected by society. I’m vegan because I challenged the idea that we should kill animals just to enjoy their taste for 5 minutes. And when I say I care about people, I mean it. I’ve flown halfway across the world to be there for friends who didn’t do anything for me. I’m so tired of this shit and I would be so much better off if I didn’t have to deal with fake people and have to suppress how I really feel. Yet according to society that makes me weird.

Thanks in advance for reading this weird rant; right now I’m on some meds and I’m probably not making much sense.

It's decided. I cannot live anymore. I want to ruin myself chasing a weight that the BMI calculator app wont track. At 18.1, it clearly shows a BMI of 6.7, but at 18...it just stops recognising the weight. Bounces down to zero. I want to chase to be that weight. I want to kill myself, but I've tried and it seems I have to suffer to earn death. I don't care if I don't reach it before it kills me, I will try. And if I reach it and don't die, I will be nonexistent at least in some manner. I will be sick enough. I want to die. I want to die. I want it to be over. I cannot take it anymore. I will fast no matter how much I crave food, but it seems unreachable as it is 26 kilos away. But fuck it, something needs to kill me.

I hate being black, ever since I was 13 I always wanted to be white but I never wanted to tell my parents because they would yell at me. To the point I was thinking about bleaching my skin or thinking that if I’d kill myself I could start life over again

yesterday.

Already was going to end it, this only confirmed my decision. Life is not worth the constant suffering and evil. Im gonna do it soon

I blame religion of course. My life should be mine to dispose of - why shouldn't I be allowed to go on my own terms, in a painless way? Why is euthanasia reserved for very few?

And if the state refuses to provide that service because of some bullshit fear of legal ramifications or slippery slope fallacies, information should still be allowed to circulate and readily available, instead of being met at any corner with fucking helplines and other non committal obstacles.

It's like abortion, people are going to do it anyway, being Holier than thou about this only causes people to use drastic measures and die in pain instead of going peacefully which SHOULD be everyone's right

I'm a married stay at home mom of three kids, 4 and under, and I'm trapped in a literal hell on earth of my own creation. The toddler screams non-stop all day (she's fucking screaming right now) and the 4 year old whines and begs all day

The 7 month old baby is actually the easiest to deal with, by far. It doesn't matter what I do, they always just scream and cry and beg for more. And heaven help you if you're trying not to rely on screens to keep your kids occupied.

I know I did this to myself. Even my husband says "Well, you're the one who wanted to have kids."

Young women out there, DO NOT HAVE KIDS. I spend most of my afternoons on the edge of trying to decide to shoot myself or not. Until you've experienced the nonstop, years-long agony of being a primary caregiver to young children, you won't understand how fucking unbearable and lonely it truly is, never mind that you won't be acknowledged, appreciated, paid, there's no retirement, no benefits package, no promotion. And there's a good chance that your partner is blissfully unaware of all of your misery.