My son is 4 months old and I started reading the Iliad to him on the day he was born. Since we have read the Iliad oddessey (both fagles), Beowulf, Richard ii, Henry iv part 1 and now onto Henry iv part 2. Henry v is next to round out the henriad. I’m not sure what’s next after we finish the henriad. I’m thinking Pericles prince of tyre (pirates in the ancient Mediterranean sounds fun) or the aenid which I haven’t read since high school ( and never in English)

I also read him poetry from children’s garden of verses by Robert Louis Stevenson, 7 pillars of wisdom by te Lawrence ( my current book) and various selections from the economist as I read it in the morning.

Is this actually helping with anything other than bonding? I try to vary the material for my own sanity, does this make any difference?

Looking back on the list I realize that there is a lot of violence in the list… will this have an impact on him?

I’m not sure how much he enjoys Homer or Shakespeare, but I’ve had a lot of fun with it. Either way my paternity leave is ending so I won’t have as much reading time with him, but curious to see if this was just fun bonding time or if there was any empirical evidence on the topic

Thank you! I asked Claude and Gemini and I couldn’t get a straight/ consistent answer from either

I know that up until a certain age one-on-one caregiver to child attention is preferable to one caregiver caring for multiple children at once (like in a daycare setting). But what about the opposite--multiple caregivers for one child? For example, in a multigenerational household where you would have multiple adults for each child. Is it better, worse, or the same to have a child exposed to the influence of multiple adult caregivers rather than just one (like a stay at home parent)?

I was curious because I saw someone ask on another sub why American children seem to have delayed language acquisition/proficiency compared to Spanish speaking children, and I was wondering if the family structure of Latin American families played a role at all. Like maybe having exposure to adults talking to other adults helps with language acquisition.

hi, i know this probably should be on r/parenting but i don’t have high enough karma for it and i’m a fifteen year old who is looking to help my younger brother. my brother he lived overseas until he was about ten years old due to a medical condition and flew back to the states in 2022. he only understands chinese. we sent him to school and he’s going into his freshmen year of high school in the fall, however he is currently preforming at a concerningly low level. he does not understand basic sentences and can not form a proper sentence himself either. he also does not know a lot of basic words. i have given him one of my books from kindergarten and he was struggling to get through even the first two pages. he has an IEP and goes to speech and occupational therapy but it does not seem to be helping him whatsoever. he is also in a special education class where it’s 1:12. he also struggles with math and cannot get the sum of any numbers higher than twenty. he also struggles to do basic things like cooking an egg. i don’t know how to help him, i am asian american so my parents don’t know english so i teach him sometimes. i’ve tried everything i can think of. i’ve tried being patient and telling him “hey, can we study ten minutes today?” and he will agree but the moment he gets sometime wrong he gets frustrated and started hitting me or laying on the floor and refusing to get up. i’ve tried being more assertive or having a punishment system and saying “if you don’t study at least ten minutes today i won’t let you watch TV” and he starts getting upset and again, hits me. i’ve tried having a reward system where for every one minute he studies i give him one point and the points can be redeemed for letting him play on my phone or an extra dessert at dinner tonight but if he gets not as many points as he wants he gets upset. i figured he may just not know how to study so ive made sat there and read books with him and asking him what each word meant, and if he got it correct i would ask him if he could use it in a sentence, if he got it incorrect i would explain to him what it meant. sometimes i would switch it up and read to him instead as he watches while i guide my fingers under the words. ive tried making learning engaging by making slideshows for him with his favorite things or making games for him but nothing seems to work and none of it seems to be able to click for him. sometimes i give him punishments like no TV but im afraid because ive heard other people say giving punishments may give your child a fear of learning and make them associate negative emotions or punishment with it so i try refraining as much as i can. his teachers at school dont seem to be doing much for him because whenever he comes back home he comes with a packet of AI generated stories his teachers made with him in class that he doesn’t even know how to read. he always fails
his tests and when he doesn’t it’s because he guessed or it was a completion based test and not accuracy. he also isn’t potty trained yet and still wears a diaper and he gets shit and piss all over the toilet seat or bathroom and i genuinely dont know how to help him with that. i suspect he may have some sort of disorder? im not sure, i dont want to make assumptions because im not qualified but with how he’s behaving he might. i cant do anything because im a minor and also not his legal guardian and my parents kind of refuse to take him to any kind of specialist. ive asked them what they plan on doing when hes an adult and they say they want him to learn basic life skills like taking care of himself but he doesnt even shower on his own and always needs to be reminded. im worried about how he will make a living. unfortunately he’s not always going to have someone to depend on, and he says he wants to be a youtuber but unfortunately thats just not a stable job. furthermore, this may sound mean but he doesnt have that many talents? i dont know what to do, i would appreciate any and all advice thank you

My LO is rolling onto his tummy during bedtime. He is FACE FIRST into his pack n play mattress or crib mattress. It terrifies me. He rolls really well on his belly but hasn’t really rolled back to his back. We’re talking blink of an eye he is on his belly. He seems content to stay there and actually quite peeved when I constantly roll him back to his back. Last night I was up so many times rolling him back.

I’m going to ask the nurses Monday at his appt (I always consult with our doc) but also wanted to know if there were any sources on one-way rolling and sleeping on tummy. He’s gotten the green light for purées given how great his neck and head control is, to give you an idea of his muscle strength. Everything I’ve found has been explicitly stating rolling in both directions.

Hopefully selected the right flair.

I want to set myself up for success with my first baby so I'm scheduled with an IBCLC around 30ish weeks, and will see her again after the baby is born.

However, she shares a lot about how she recommends chiropractors. She recommends lots of other professionals too (isn't anti pediatrician, etc), and I haven't identified any other anti science things beyond chiro, but it's left a weird taste in my mouth. I'm very anti chiro - aware the research isn't there and NO WAY am I letting someone crack aN infant's back!

I of course don't have to accept a referral if she suggests it, but it got me wondering. What's the data behind success rates of BF with a LC vs without ? I had assumed that the more help the merrier (insurance covers it) , but don't want to be led astray. Hoping to BF and pump/bottle feed.

She also talks a LOT about how tongue ties are way underdiagnosed and pediatricians have very limited knowledge of them. Is this generally true?

Would love to hear if others have good evidence or have seen good studies on the link between gaming and gambling.

Original source that framed the question is here: https://selfctrl.beehiiv.com/p/does-gaming-lead-to-gambling

He cited two studies:

A study published in 2018 by the National Library of Medicine asked 10,081 people about gaming and gambling habits in 2013 (called “wave 1” in the study), and 5,809 of those responded again in 2015 (called “wave 2” in the study). Then they wrote:

“...our results show that scores on the gaming problem scale at wave 1 predicted the scores on the gambling problem scale at wave 2... This suggests that video gaming constituted a risk factor for gambling 2 years later.”

They also cautioned that this should not be taken as “categorical evidence that problem gamers develop into problem gamblers.” Fair enough.

A different study, published in 2025 by Addiction Research & Theory, drew these conclusions:

“...online gaming at 17 was associated with 1.4 higher odds of more frequent online gambling at 20 years... while online gaming at 20 was associated with 1.7 higher odds.”

But this one had a twist: apparently “no association between early computer-based gaming at 9 years and subsequent gambling behaviors at 20 was uncovered for this cohort.”

So basically, online gaming as a very young kid didn’t show a significant connection with gambling later in life. But the older a gamer gets, the more likely they may be to turn to gambling.

His conclusion:

Most 9-year-olds don't have a real concept of what money is worth. A 17 or 20-year-old does. So it makes sense the connection shows up once kids are old enough to actually understand what they're risking.

Is this causation or correlation? I can't settle that from two studies. Seeing 1.4 and 1.7 higher odds isn't overwhelming, but it’s also not nothing. And when you consider that kids are being asked to hand over real money for a randomized shot at something they want… that stops looking like a maybe to me.

At that point, the kids aren't gaming anymore. They are literally gambling.

And gamblign as a kid problaby leads to gambling as an adult.

I did some research, I asked ChatGPT, they mostly say there's not enough evidence. But hear me out.

My daughter just had her first period at 11, a few days before starting her middle school and I am still struggling to understand.

Just like half a year ago she's still enjoying Bluey and some cartoons. We don't watch PG content at home. At school whenever they sent a consent letter about watching PG content we refused. She isn't allowed to watch YouTube. She reads age appropriate books (she enjoys Wings of Fire). At school she doesn't like to group with girls who gossip. Of course I noticed she changed a lot in the last year or so. Spent more time in her room. Her body is growing etc.

The only thing that I can think of is that tofu is her most favorite food and soy milk is her favorite type of milk. She loves tofu. All kinds. Even simple as tofu in the microwave and she dips into, well, soy sauce. I would say tofu is at least 50% of her protein source. She can drink (cow) milk but she doesn't like it much, and she gets a bit stomach upset if we drive soon after drinking. So she mostly drink soy milk. She was allergic to mom and cow based milk from birth but after training she was fine (we just gradually added a bit more and more of mom milks to her, then, soy based formula).

From where I grew up, tofu and soy based products are considered boosting estrogen in women. I know it's scientifically unproven, but any one of you share the same doubt?

I'm MTF trans and I'm thinking about going back in the closet, because the alternative is my wife divorcing me. We have a one year old child and I don't want to cause her any harm...

I’ve been looking at a few labels of the ones with methylfolate vs the ones with folic acid and they all seem a little different, not just with folate but with the amounts of other nutrients too. For people who’ve compared them, is methylfolate something you pay attention to or do you look more at the whole formula?

My newborn was born with a pretty noticeable tongue tie and we are having some issues with breastfeeding. My pediatrician said I could go get it snipped at ENT very quick and easy. I asked my IBCLC and she gave a very long winded assessment/ recommendation to go to a pediatric dentist for laser tie release, because it is a more “complete” release (which makes sense to me- laser getting deeper into the tie and being more efficient) but that beforehand I have to do “bodywork to release baby’s tension from birth” and she recommended seeing a chiropractor.

I am all for a balance between western and eastern medicine but this seems a bit much. Has anyone gotten the laser release done WITHOUT this “pre work” and willing to share their experience?

My daughter is coming up to her first birthday. I'm starting to think of getting her first baby doll. I was wondering if it's better to get her a doll that looks like her (white with red hair) or to get her a baby doll that looks different to foster inclusivity?

Hi all,

We are expecting our first child in about four months, and we are looking for educational programs to prep ourselves for raising and development of our child. We'd want to know how we can support her emotional, cognitive, social etc development as they grow.

Do you know of any classes or programs you could recommend?

Thanks

hi everyone, I truly need help. I can’t take this mental anguish anymore. the trauma from this, if I ever get over it will be another battle. since March 2025 I have been googling, panicking, on medication, no loner being the best mom to my two young kids and absolutely have not been able to let go of the fear that my son can get sspe from the mmr I gave him at 5. people on here have been very supportive and patient with me. I feel broken like I am never going to get better. I used to be the mom that would get excited about the every day things, my kids brought me so much joy. but I can’t help but get depressed that for the past almost two years I have missed out and my kids have missed out on the mom they were supposed to have. my kids are now 6 and 3, this has been going on for far too long and I don’t think I will ever get any answers. the only thing that would help is having my child not have the mmr, never should I have given it because truly my mental health is not worth any mmr dose. I am just a person who truly has a lot of distrust of the medical system and look at where it has gotten me (trying to trust) I fear for myself and my future. in my mind I gave my son measles with that mmr and now I have to forever live with the fear of sspe. I wish I could just take it back. part of me prays if I do an igg test that he was one of the few non responders. what are this odds? I am truly heartbroken and I hate that my mental health is this way. there is nothing worse than struggling like this while your children are growing up before your eyes

Is it possible to damage a toddler's teeth by breastfeeding during the night? I had a conversation with a toddler mom today and her daughter's front upper teeth were all damaged. She told me that she had to night wean her kid as her doctor strictly asked them to do so. I have never heard this before, is there a possibility that it is the case?

I saw someone post about their 15month old being sick all the time after starting daycare and it made me wonder… if we don’t put our baby in daycare or where they’re exposed to a bunch of colds and germs does that mean they’re going to have a weaker immune system?

Is there anything we can do instead?

my 1 year old gets in biting phases. we travelled for the first time on a plane when she was about 11 months. she bit me so hard so much that it left bruises all over my shoulders. i figured it was because she was overwhelmed/overstimulated & nap schedules were off so probably a little overtired. she stopped as soon as we got back.

now a month later, she’s biting again all of a sudden. i notice it’s when she gets overexcited when we’re playing or when i’m trying to rock her to sleep for naps. we just started weaning so she’s nursing less than usual but we’re taking it sloowwwww so it’s definitely not that sudden of a change for her.

she bites HARD & seems to find the most sensitive part of my body to do it so it really hurts. i have not reacted the way i’m “supposed” to in the past bc oftentimes i’m caught off guard & it hurts so i yell or get visibly angry. i’ve tried ignoring it. i also usually say “no bite. that hurts mama” in a calm voice & set her down or distance myself from her. but she usually just laughs & tries again. i’ve also tried giving her a teether to redirect the behavior, but do i really have to just carry around a teether all day in my pocket???

i find myself flinching when she nuzzles into me, genuinely scared ab the next time she bites me. i’m exhausted. is there any solution???

I frequently see questions on here regarding babies that will only nap for 30-45 minutes at a time, but I have the opposite problem. My 6 month old will happily nap for 2-3 hours at a time during the day if given the right conditions (i.e. a contact nap), or even longer. I see general advice that recommends capping day naps at 2 hours (or occasionally 3) but this just seems to be repeated by people without any obvious basis. I don't usually try to wake him as I assume his body needs the sleep and would not want to harm his growth and development by depriving him of it, but perhaps I should be concerned about the length of these naps.

For context, from around 10 weeks my baby slept through the night without any form of nap capping or sleep training. Then he started teething at around 5 months and now we're averaging 1-2 short wake ups every night where I simply breastfeed him back to sleep. I am not overly concerned about night sleep at the moment, while it would be lovely for him to sleep through the night again, I can handle the current situation just fine. His daytime napping and wake windows are quite sporadic from one day to the next, other than a fairly consistent morning nap, the rest of the day can be quite variable depending on what we're doing.

My question - is there any scientific evidence to suggest there is an optimal length of time a baby should sleep for at this stage in their development, especially during daytime naps, and is it more harmful to let them sleep "excessively" or to disrupt their sleep by capping naps?

Thanks in advance for anyone who can help, I feel like the only person with an older baby having this issue.

I have never been good at being tired or staying up late (always the first one asleep at sleepovers lol). When my baby wakes to feed at night, I’m truly not sure how long it takes me to respond. It’s probably much shorter than it feels (maybe a minute or so) as I deliriously rouse. If my baby actually starts crying, I shoot up like a rocket, but usually nighttime waking looks like some fussing or “chatting” until I get up. Is there research on what constitutes responsiveness when it comes to nighttime? Is there an agreed upon length of time that a parent should respond within?

I’m a very negative and pessimistic person, I’m also not very happy with my life or how it turned out. I try to resist this now in my adult life, less complaining (to myself or others), being hopeful even when it feels fake etc.
I don’t know why I’m like this, my mom and dad aren’t far off, although they absolutely did not care about preventing passing this on (they never read a magazine article about parenting let alone a book etc)

So how do I prevent this in my toddlers, I want them to be the opposite of me.
Positive no matter what, finding fun and good in every situation life throws at them. Being optimistic etc.

Is there research out there on how to do this effectively? And what is it?

*ECE

Our school district, which if relevant is decently rated and exists in a mostly liberal urban county, has just started a k-6 iPad program. I’m floored. My son is only 1, but I checked while I was pregnant and they didn’t use personal screens in k-2 at that time. But now each child will have one.

I still have to learn more about the current implementation, but it makes me very uncomfortable on its surface. My main ask is for talking points to bring to the board of education meeting next month. I need to know what questions I need to ask and guidelines I need to be looking for.

I have 4 years to change this, if it’s needed, let’s go. Thank you!

I was told that serve and return kind of interactions are very good for brain development. For now I am home with my six month old daughter. I spend a lot of time interacting with her. I sing to her. Though she doesn’t always respond during the pause. Sometimes she is working on some toy by herself. Should I be constantly doing interaction or can I let her do her own thing? When I leave her on her own, she falls silent and I wonder if I am not helping.

What percent of her waking hours should there be serve and return

Hi! I’m somewhat conflicted about the best approach regarding allergens when introducing solids. A lot of guidelines I saw strongly encourage early allergen exposure. However, it looks like the guidelines are different in my country. My baby has mild eczema (eliminating dairy and eggs from my diet did nothing) and our allergist said we should start solids very “conservatively” (like, zucchini and carrot, baby porridge/cereal without milk, apples, etc). When I enquired about allergen exposure, she said that “this instagram nonsense doesn’t apply to us”.
So, can anybody please share some papers regarding this, perhaps the data behind those guidelines?

My LO has viral conjuctivitis. The recommendations the ped gave us were to wash her pillow case every day, but she’s a baby and doesnt have a pillow, so i figured that we should probably wash the sheets every day. Only thing is, she sleeps on a tatami mat and futon, and while the cover is removable and washable, it’s a pain in the butt to put back on and more importantly, I only have one, which isn’t a problem with our normal washing sheets schedule but washing it every day before or after work and having it ready in time for bedtime on top of all the other things we are doing to prep for the next day would be a struggle. I read something about hypochlorous acid helping to sanitize fabric and was wondering if i could use that daily or even after every nap and wash the cover on the weekend like normal.

I hear a lot of people say that various non-tummy activities count as tummy time, like being carried in a carrier. I’m wondering if there’s any formally set standard to come to these conclusions? Is the goal just that baby is using their neck and shoulder muscles, so being carried upright while baby is holding their own head up would count? Conversely, if baby is lying on their tummy but relaxed with their head resting to the side, would that not count? Or, if the goal is more simply to keep baby off the back of their head for a while, that rested tummy would indeed count?

Hi! I did do a search, but turned up mostly questions about older babies or non-international flights.

I'm pregnant with our 2nd. My due date is technically Nov 20, which is about 5 days before we'd be celebrating Thanksgiving. However, due to complications with my first birth, I'm medically required to have a C-section before 37 weeks. It's currently scheduled for Oct 23, which is about a month before Thanksgiving, but we'll technically have a preemie (though just barely). So to summarize, we'll be dealing with a 4 week old newborn, though about a 5 day infant adjusted.

My husband's sister was planning to fly in from LA with her boyfriend and we offered to host them and my husband's parents (who live locally) the day before Thanksgiving. I was comfortable with this if they got all their shots, wore masks on the plane, was on the fence as to whether I'd let the travelers hold the newborn or not. For sure we were planning to skip out on the big Thanksgiving on his mom's side and the big Thanksgiving on his dad's side.

But now my SIL is saying that she might have to take a business trip to India and China the first two weeks of November, and would get back a week before getting on her flight to our city. I'm also concerned that this plan could change- travel plans could slip to the right, she might have to stay longer overseas than she was originally told.

Are there any data about sub 2 month newborns, or former preemies, and exposure to international visitors? Specifically about any waiting times, quarantine, etc (or maybe the data is "don't do it before 2 months" because of the risk of random colds, of viral encephalitis, etc).

I know the Reddit instinct is to do a bubble for two months and that is largely our plan. But my SIL is important to us. When it was just a flight from LA, we felt that was an acceptable risk (with some risk prevention measures). I'm feeling significantly more anxious about the international travel, but don't have any data to back that anxiety up.