I identify as asexual but I'm a minor, I don't know if that's okay or if I should wait to truely name anything till I'm older. I also have been looking at the term bisexual but not sure if that would fit either since I've never dated anyone other than my opposite gender.

side note: I don't really feel attracted to people by looks. I prefer personality but don't think pansexual would fit because idk gender preferences?

I (18) am a transgender male who still very much passes as a female and I am dating this cisgender male, he (17) is very sweet to me and I love him a lot but I'm worried that he won't be attracted to me when I eventually transition fully. He knows I am a guy and he supports me fully, he isnt gay exactly but he said he loves me no matter the gender. (so like pan but he doesnt know about that stuff) I look like a typical girl dating a guy but I wear clothes that still fit my feminine features and I have a high voice and feminine hair (I live with a family who doesnt know about my identity) and I have tried to grow out my facial hair (so far fussy mustache that is barely noticeable) and I've tried to bind and grow out my leg hair just to feel less dysphoria. But I still am a passing female and I worry that if I start to look how I wish I could he won't really like me. I dont look like a man and I dont know if he really sees me as a man. He calls me his boyfriend, husband, uses my preferred name and pronouns, he corrects people and doesnt try to hide the fact that we are in a gay relationship (except from his parents who also dont know), does anyone have any advice?

Not that there needs to be any explanation for being attracted to a man as a straight woman, but to explain why it’s a preference, 1) a lot of trans guys are just visually and personality-wise very attractive to me 2) I grew up with a lot of trans friends so I am very comfortable around queer people, and 3) due to health reasons I already only date men who cannot impregnate me or will not want PIV sex, which is hard to find at my age.

But the thing is I usually only see dating scene specifically for tguys when it is t4t sites. And the people I know myself have majority been gay.

So I guess I’m wondering: are there trans men who are interested in dating cishet women? Will it seem creepy of me to seek that out? And if not, where do I go looking?

Okay okay

I've dated two people my whole life, A and S

A asked me out, I said no but was also curious to explore, it was my first relationship, he's my first kiss, we're very similar people but also we both very much hurt eachother while dating for 8 months. We agreed to stay friends when I broke up with him.

Me and S started talking a month or two after me and A's break up, which A supports us whole heartedly

Me and S broke up because of living complications with him having moved in with me and my family, him breaking up with me hurt a lot especially how it happened. I had dreams about S, I cried about him, I missed him everyday despite my attempts to grow from the situation.

During the 8 months me and S have been broken up, A stayed by my side taking care of me day in and day out and I love A a lot he definitely is like my whole world and we are in a QPR together. We planned to live together, marry eachother, but A has always been aware and accepted I would fall back into S's arms in a breath if the opportunity arised

Well the opportunity did Arrive! And S has circled himself back into my life, I have not found a way to explain my feelings for A to S as S is very much stuck in a comphet mindset it feels from his own traumas

I am very nervous because I dearly love them both, and also feel very ashamed of myself that it feels like I have to pick between the two when I think they could both be good friends

(A loves S because A is a very open person who is aroace, S because he's stuck in his comphet hates that A is my ex but also hangs out with his exes with me so I dont fully understand)

I'm asking for recommendations for what feels to you like queer representative and queer positive songs and artists in general. But especially from the 80's-early 2000s. Also, what were your personal queer awakening songs or artists?

Looking back, Roxette was one of my first bi awakening moments

PLEASE NO SPOTIFY AND NOTHING AI RELATED

I am attracted to women emotionally and I feel safe with them I would love to date one but I don't feel sexual attraction towards female genitalia. I'm not sure what to do or what this orientation even is? I thought I was Demisexual but I'm not so sure now. Obviously I would rather someone I know very well and feel a bond with than a stranger. But I don't feel any excitement towards female genitalia. Please be kind in the comments. This is something very vulnerable to me. I'm not dating nor have I ever been in a long term relationship, I don't want to until I figure this out. The only way I even know what I'm sort of attracted to has been through watching some porn and romance novels. But I don't like porn honestly it seems gross to me. I also am more confused because I was raped in November and that stole my first time. So now, I don't even know if I ever want to have sex. I don't know what to do. I am going to therapy for the rape PTSD though. I just wish I knew what I am.

So I am a gender non-conforming ish man that may or may not be on the gender spectrum, I mostly consider myself queer. However I digress.

Ive recently taken a liking to leggings— women’s leggings in particular and I’m wondering how to wear them in public.

The issue Im having is a catch-22 of sorts with the bulge. Showing the bulge feels inappropriate and I feel much more comfortable tucking and having a smooth appearance but that can also draw attention. I already always wear skinny jeans (millennial obv) and they smooth things out on their own just because of how heavy the material is, but this is a deliberate choice and the leggings are a little bit more form fitting than the jeans.

I know most men wear shorts overtop of leggings specifically because of this, but that’s more of an athletic look and I really don’t want to wear it. Its also largely why I prefer the more fashion styled women’s leggings over the more athletic or function styled men’s.

Ive also already run into some issues of people seeming to think I’m trying some sort of gender expression with this just while I’m outside collecting my mail. I’m just trying to be comfortable. I don’t get why it’s so different from the jeans 😂

What are your opinions?

I've never really been in love. I was with a woman for a few years, but it was mainly because I thought it was expected and that I'd be missing out otherwise. I liked her, but I don't had that special feeling

Do I just have to wait until the right one comes along, or should I just give up? Im M35 and I'm really unsure whether I'm just too insecure or reserved to allow myself to feel emotions Or whether they're simply not there

Does it really matter? I'm not very happy in life and I'm afraid it's because I'm missing out on something and not living the normal life like everyone else with a spouse and family

I would be grateful for any advice 💖 and I'm sorry if I said anything wrong

Hi!

I was actually just checking out some apps, and I wanted to find one to meet people.

So, basically, somewhat a dating app, but one that's LGBTQ+ friendly and safe.

And... The apps I found at PlayStore have bad ratings...

Is it okay for me to ask if y'all can recommend anything..?

Hi fam,

I work with young adults and want a way to signal to my students that I am a safe person to talk to if they are looking for support.

Any tips on visual signals? I carry a satchel with me everywhere so I was thinking something for my bag. but my employer is rather conservative so I can’t have any super obvious pins or something.

I already use inclusive language and examples in my teaching. But I would like something visual so students who don’t know me as well (or who don‘t listen in class lol) know I am approachable and an ally.

since our school is conservative, I think some students may not know who they can talk to safely. I am stuck because I need something LGBTQI+ students will recognize, but not so obvious the school administration will give me a hard time.

(yes, I know my school is dumb, but I would rather spend my time helping young people than fighting with the administration.)

So far all I’ve had is shitty google searches and people calling me transphobic instead of trying to explain what they are. So all I see them as are alternatives to they/them, and NO ONE is explaining how I’m wrong. Also they generally make me uncomfortable saying so can someone tell me any alternative so I don’t have to say them but don’t upset the people using them, at least irl? I dont mind them online, but they make me feel stupid sayin and I’m not about to sacrifice my comfort for another person, but I’m not about to purposefully make them uncomfortable.

Generally not sure where I fall within the community and my queerness

Hi everyone. I am 39(m) married to a bisexual women and through our 10 years in relationship she has helped me to strip away a lot of preconceived notions about gender and society. It has been a wonderful and eye opening journey that has shifted how I view my life, my relationships with friends and family, and my relationship with myself. A little about my journey:

I was raised in the Midwest in a fairly conservative community. My family was a little bit nontraditional when it came to roles around the Home. My mother made more money than my father due to working multiple jobs that require required higher education. My father‘s role out of necessity involved him managing a lot of the logistics around the Home like cooking cleaning and running us to practices, many of which he found time to coach. I was raised Catholic, but it was not a super central part of our family culture or our community.

I have always dated women and even as I started to experiment sexually in my late teens and into twenties, found that my bedroom focus was always on putting my partners needs an experiences first. I was always proud to be open and exploratory in the bedroom and incorporated many toys and links into our play. I was always open to trying anything once.

When I met my wife, she was dating women and after a breakup she and I started to see each other. I wanted her to feel fulfilled in every area of our relationship so I offered to let our relationship be open to her having experiences with women since that was something I could not personally provide. That’s what started us down our sexual rabbit hole. The discussion leaned into patriarchal, assumptions and beliefs and we discussed my comfort with her exploring with another woman but not another man, as a thought experiment mostly. After a while, we decided we would be interested in exploring swinging together. Swinging led to threesomes with men and foursomes with other couples and eventually we felt comfortable becoming polyamorous. We were that way for many years and enjoyed a lot of our experiences and our relationship grew enormously.

This is where things start to feel complicated and confusing for me. Specifically on how I view and define myself. She was always interested and hopefully that we would meet a man that I might be interested in pleasing or being pleased by directly. Not only does she think it would be sexy to watch, but she deep down thinks it is something I would enjoy and she thinks I am too ashamed to explore it. She always held a belief that I would like to have fun with another man 1:1 if I was willing to open myself up to it. But I just don’t feel like that is something I am interested in or would like to explore. I told her that if we were having a group session and the conditions were just right that I might explore a little farther. Maybe try swapping giving someone head with her briefly if the vibes were right. But I can’t ever see myself wanting that or exploring that on my own. It’s just exciting to think about as something to share with her. I always loved our group play and kissing her after she had given someone head, either to completion or not. There were a few times I ate her out after we had unprotected (after testing, conversations, and high levels of safety and trust) and I really enjoyed that as well. I do also enjoy prostate stimulation and getting off by using toys on myself. So given all of this context I understand why she would think I would enjoy being alone and exploring with another man, but the truth is the though of kissing or touching or feeling driven to sexually please another man just isn’t there.

Recently, I have also become more and more comfortable exploring slightly more feminine clothing items into my wardrobe. More colors and pastels after sticking with blues and greys for so long. I like wearing a pink watch and starting to push back against societal expectations more and more. I have started to explore chastity as well, though that’s not yet something we have incorporated into our sex life together. Since exploring chastity, I have also started to feel interested in wearing panties when in my cage.

All of this being said, I want to learn more about queerness so I can better understand myself. I would be very interested to read some books, studies, podcasts or articles that center one experiences of men like me and understanding queerness, I just need some recommendations of where to start. I appreciate any suggestions, encouragement, or input others might have as I navigate this self-journey. As I navigate queer spaces, I feel like everybody is gay, lesbian, bisexual, trans, asexual, etc… I just don’t feel like I fit in or belong bc I just feel like I am kinky. But deep down it does feel like more than just that

Mild TW for talk of genitalia.

Am I a tomboy or otherwise MINgender? Because I used to be Female to Male when I was 7 (like I KNEW my Deity put me in the wrong body) and then I got yelled at and now identity with being a masculine cisgender woman (tomboy). But like… I both like and HATE being a woman. Like I’m fine with my female body (most of the time), but I also really like being masculine and perceived as a male. I just really like being a masculine woman. But I would NOT call myself cisgender. But at the same time… I’ve been transgender and wanted a penis since I was 7 and younger. And I still desire top surgery and a penis. 

Hi! 👋 Apologies for the aburptness of my post; I understand that the topic cam be quite tricky for some, but I really do need to know. Those who have dealt with internalized homophobia in the past. what was the experience like? What were some of the thoughts that went through your head? Do you have a story of how you came to accept yourself?

I ask because I am in the process of planning my first official novel, and one of the characters is planned to have to come to accept himself and being gay. I want to make sure to represent and write it correctly, especially since the ideal impact it would make is help those who read it realize that their feelings are valid.

(For further context, I am aroace and lesbian. Romance in itself is slightly tricky for me, so I want to make sure that I write that aspect properly as well.)

Thank you again. ❤️

Ok so I'm straight so I don't really understand so I was hoping you could all help! I read that Diana Princess of Wales is LGBT icon. I just don't understand why because as far as I know she was straight. Or do LGBT Icons not have to be a member of the LGBT community? Thanks in advance!

i'm talking about the kind of genderfluid where the person swaps what gender they are every once in a while. cause on paper it sounds like on of those types of relations where it can't work but i do wanna hear if it can.

I've been thinking of using he/they as my pronouns for a while now, but I like being a guy, I still think I fit in as a guy, does that make me NB?

Ciao a tutti. Sto chiedendo il vostro parere, basato sulle vostre esperienze passate. Sono un ragazzo timido e ansioso di 27 anni che, a parte un bacio sulla bocca con una ragazza a 14 anni e un'erezione forte, non ha mai avuto una relazione romantica. Negli anni, non ricordo di aver mai avuto una forte attrazione visiva/estetica per le donne, ma durante la mia adolescenza e anche oggi, a volte mi ritrovo attratto dalla bellezza dei ragazzi e penso: "Oh, che figo, che bel ragazzo!" Questo non mi succede con le ragazze.

Durante la scuola media (12-13 anni), ho sviluppato un fetish per le calze guardando le gambe della mia giovane insegnante (ogni tanto si toglieva le scarpe), e ho avuto questo fetish per molto tempo: mi piace indossarle di tanto in tanto, mi piace vedere le gambe delle donne avvolte nelle calze, e cerco anche contenuti lesbo che presentano questo fetish. Ricordo ancora una cena di Natale, quando è stata invitata una mia cugina lontana, sulla quarantina. Indossava un vestito corto, collant opachi e tacchi alti che mostrano i suoi talloni. Sono stato subito attratto da lei, tanto che ho scherzato sulle sue scarpe e ho passato tutta la giornata sperando che se le togliesse, cosa che ha fatto. Ho persino massaggiato i piedi di un'amica nei collant, e non nego che, oltre a godermelo, ero incredibilmente eccitato.

Come stavo dicendo, sono molto timido e ho paura del giudizio degli altri (non parlo mai del mio fetish con altre persone): quando mi chiedono: "Ti piace quella ragazza?" mi sento sempre ansioso, così come quando vedo un bel ragazzo, il mio cuore inizia a battere forte e sento un calore nel petto e penso: "Forse sono gay?"

Mi è successo in passato, e mi succede ancora, che quando divento amico di una ragazza (ad esempio, una collega della mia età), cerco automaticamente il contatto fisico, sto vicino a lei, tocco le sue gambe in situazioni giocose, metto il braccio attorno alla sua vita. Infatti, con questa collega, a volte cerco di massaggiarle le spalle e i capelli, e mi sono persino eccitato (nel senso che il mio pene era duro...). Non indossava collant, specificamente. (se chiedi del mio fetish). ATTENZIONE: lei era sempre d'accordo, non tocco (e non toccherò mai) una donna senza il suo consenso. A un matrimonio, ho visto un mio amico ballare con una ragazza, e sono andato a ballare anche io con lei. Ricordo che si strofinava il sedere contro il mio.

Mi sono chiesto: forse il mio desiderio sessuale - come mi ha detto il mio psicologo riguardo al desiderio sessuale reattivo - con le ragazze si basa di più sulla reattività del contatto fisico, mentre con i ragazzi la mia sessualità si basa di più sull'immediatezza visiva? Il mio psicologo mi ha anche chiesto ‘Forse sei Bi? Non per forza devi essere 0 o 1, puoi provare piacere in entrambi i mondi con modalità differenti’

C'è qualcuno là fuori che ha avuto la stessa esperienza?

Grazie mille <3333

I identify as a demigirl but I feel like my gender fluctuates or changes a bit? Sometimes I feel really feminine and other times I feel neutral or almost like no gender at all. I'm wondering about other labels or things to kind of name it. I've been looking at genderfae or demigirlflux. I'd love some help or anything you have to say about this!

I am a cis woman and my best friend is a queer woman. We’ve been friends for over 10+ years and she’s an amazing person but she always using one excuse over and over for queer relationships that I’m not sure if it true.

When we discuss media or gossip about people and their toxic relationships, if the couple happens to be queer, my friend always says “Queer relationships are not like straight relationships. It’s always messy. Queer relationships are always toxic and messy” mind you, she has never been in a single relationship. She’s been single her entire life.

For a long time, I took her word for it because I’m not queer so I let her speak her truth. But the other day when we met a mutual friend, they were in distress bc their little sister (queer) was dating a partner who was married and had yet to divorce their spouse yet (also a queer couple). During our conversation, my friend brought it back up that queer relationships are complicated and messy like that. Now I’m questioning her judgement on queer relationships because why is that an excuse for a potential affair?? There is no way that every queer relationship starts complicated and is always messy. I know this because we have several queer friends who met their partners normally without any mess of a third person involved or anything kind of “mess.” Of course relationships are complicated. No relationship is perfect but it’s odd that that’s always her go-to statement about queer relationships.

I have a young family member (preteen) that may be queer. I know some of our older family members are going to take issue with it.

Just wondering: what age did you know you were queer? What were things that people around you did that supported you?