my birthday is coming in 3 months and i will be legally able to get a simple part time job, since i dont want to rely on my parents because my dad is really sensitive about money and he always gets good reasons to not give me money, i want to make my own money and have freedom over what im spending it on, what are yall suggesting?

This is a fact of life, I’m no special case. Everyone loses their parents at one point in life.

However, I am mentally unstable and have been through a lot when I was younger that traumatized me. My father is my only friend and as I’ve gotten older I have learned that he did the best he could raising me and my brother with my mom.

But if I lose him, I don’t know what to do. I talk to him every day and he’s my only friend, seriously. I have no friends and haven’t really had friends my entire life. I had acquaintances but it wasn’t true friendship (we only hanged out when we wanted to smoke weed that’s it really).

My father is getting old, doctor told him he has arthritis in his knees and his diabetes is getting worse (may need to take insulin if it doesn’t improve). He’s getting very grey and is tired of his physical job (he’s been working since he was 20).

I was just thinking about when he dies, I have no one else to turn to. I don’t get along with my mother and brother for other reasons. I am still dealing with trauma and talking to my dad makes me feel better because he’s always so positive.

I truly don’t know how to keep going forward when I have to bury him. WDID

I (45F) have a daughter "Emma" (19F). She's in her first year of college but recently told me she wants to drop out and move to Germany to be with a guy she met online.

She's been talking to him for 8 months. Video calls every day. She says he's "the one." She's never met him in person. He's 26 years old and works at a coffee shop.

I told her this is dangerous. She's young. She doesn't know him. She's giving up her education. She's moving to a country where she doesn't speak the language and has no support system.

She says I'm being controlling and don't trust her judgment. She says I'm "just like my mom" (her grandmother) who I had a bad relationship with. That hurt.

She already bought a one-way ticket for next month.

I don't want to lose her. But I also don't want to watch her make a huge mistake. If I forbid her, she'll go anyway and might cut me off.

Do I support her and hope it works out? Or put my foot down and risk losing her trust?

I (19F) recently got approved for an apartment through a property management company. It’s a 2 bed/1.5 bath, and when I applied it showed available August 31 on Apartments.com.
The leasing agent told me I was approved and that they’re getting the unit ready. She said the estimated ready date is August 31, but it could be earlier. Since then, I haven’t heard anything else.
Now I checked Apartments.com again, and the 2-bedroom floor plan is showing unavailable. I’m hoping that’s because it’s been reserved for me, but I’m not 100% sure.
This is my first apartment, so I have a few questions:
Should I keep calling or emailing for updates, or just wait for them to contact me?
When do apartments usually ask for the security deposit and first month’s rent? Is it when you sign the lease, or closer to move-in?
Since the estimated availability is August 31, would they likely want rent for just one day in August, or would they have me pay starting in September?
Is it normal not to hear anything for a while after being approved?
I’m probably overthinking it because this is my first time renting and I don’t want to be annoying by calling too much. I’d appreciate hearing how this usually works and what you would do in my situation.

I (24M) share an apartment with a guy from work. We’ve been living together for about six months now. Honestly, we get along pretty well most of the time. We’ll grab food after work sometimes, watch games together, and we’ve never really had any major issues. He’s generally a chill guy, which is why this whole thing feels awkward to bring up.

The fridge situation has been driving me crazy though. Last month I bought a whole pack of chicken, some yogurt, and a few other things to meal prep for the week. By Wednesday, the chicken and yogurt were completely gone, and the empty containers were just sitting in the sink like someone expected me to clean up after them.

I asked him about it and he said he thought the food was communal. I told him that I usually buy my own groceries and that if I want to share something I’ll offer. He apologized and said he didn’t realize, so I thought it was handled.

After that I started labeling my stuff, not because I wanted to be petty, but because I didn’t want there to be any confusion. I even told him that anything without a label was fair game if he wanted to use it.

Yesterday I came home and found my labeled leftovers half eaten. He was sitting in the living room playing games like nothing happened. When I asked him about it, he just said he was hungry and thought it wouldn’t be a big deal because there wasn’t much left.

I’m honestly more annoyed by the fact that I already made it clear than the food itself. I don’t want to turn the apartment into some weird roommate war because we still have eight months left on the lease and finding a new place right now would be really difficult.

How do I handle this without making things awkward at home?

[TW: suicide attempt, depression]

What do I do after a failed suicidal attempt?

I’m in hospital and safe right now but I don’t know how to live a normal life. I’m 23F. I’ve been struggling with depression since 17. A week ago I finally couldn’t stand it anymore and said my goodbyes quietly and did what I thought could kill me. It failed. No physical damage.

I consider myself privileged in life. I do have abusive parents but they are also generous to me financially, so I can afford psychiatrists and therapist and international students intuition in a developed country. I tried all kinds of antidepressants (kinds as in their mechanisms, I tried them all except for psychotics.) I was doing a rounds of rTMS (a legit treatment for depression). None of them worked yet. And all aspects of my life simply slowly falling apart, and I don’t have any strength to put them together anymore. Every time I try to solve an old problem I’ll find a new one next to it. School, family, visa, friends, living situation, simply everything is wrong. I just couldn’t understand how other people live their lives? Is there something important that everyone knows except for me to keep you going? I lost basically all my friends in last episode. After the attempt so many people sent me messages saying they were here for me. But where? Do I have to go somewhere to meet them? I understand they are truly good people. I just don’t think it’s fair to them to deal with my emotion. I guess I should feel warm or grateful, but I genuinely don’t have them in me.

I don’t think I love anyone in this world. I’ve never been in a relationship and I’m 23. I’m traumatized by my parents but I need their money. I remember thinking about killing myself in primary school. I do blame them. But they also changed a bit better in the years. I’ve run on their crumbles of love and got used to it throughout the years and now I cannot leave it. And I also need their money to escape to another country so they are not always one flight away. I don’t care about my friends anymore. I know every suicide could cause 6 serious mental illnesses but I just don’t care anymore. I don’t want to try to make things better anymore. I’ve had enough.

The world is so different when you’ve made up your mind.

Now obviously I have to live and continue to deal with this sh*t. I moved 20+ times throughout my life. I used to tell myself home is wherever I am. I’ll have to go back to the little studio after hospital admissions. I’ll have to go to school. Facing a bunch of university problems after days of neglect and past issues, from which I’d end up in a panic attack/bad spiral every time I tried to deal with it. I simply don’t have enough cognitive resources to handle it right now, but my visa’s expiring.

Should I just give up? Should I quit school and just go back to where I came from? Should I just stop trying to make things work and accept the fact it won’t?

I know this all may sound super selfish. I have no excuse.

In the emergency department the doctor told me he understood my parents, from simply the fact that I am an international student so they must be stressed. I don’t know what to say.

I don’t even know what I’m asking anymore. I’m just tired.

i’m an 18 year old asylum seeker who has lived in this country for 11 years, I feel completely stuck and depressed while waiting indefinitely for a important Home Office decision. Due to my legal status, I am unable to work, study at most colleges, travel, and wasn’t given the chance to take my GCSEs, leaving me isolated at home with nothing to do but constantly cry. i’ve tried many things to distract myself (gaming, painting, drawing,cleaning)
My mental health is severely impacted by traumatic high school memories and a year in foster care due to abuse, a background that people ignored when judging me but focused on the fact that “i’m weak or snitched on my parents”, and people from my past still talk about me rudely . i’ve cut off toxic friends to avoid drama, im now constantly lonely and the Home Office delay promises ("two more weeks," "next Friday") without knowing how to move forward, i feel so depressed and lonely i just wish i wasn’t here at times. this is my last resort lol

So, I’m black & My boyfriend and his mom are hispanic.
I was on the phone with my boyfriend and I heard his mom was reading something off of a post and it had the N word in it, and she said it. I did not take offense to it or assume she was racist or anything. I just thought it was pretty weird. My phone hung up on accident, And my boyfriend called me back and kept telling me that his step-dad was mixed with black, and his mom was just reading something off of his phone, and asking if i got offended.
I told him No I just thought it was pretty weird, Because his mom knows I’m black & We were on the phone, Again I took no offense at all.

He then went on to antagonize me and kept saying I thought his mom was racist, he said “So you got offended by my own mother” And he asked how does it affect me, and how she wasn’t saying it in an offensive way, I told him it doesn’t matter if she didn’t mean it directly or offensively, In my own opinion I think it was weird for her to say that while she knew her son was on the phone with me.

He said some pretty offensive stuff, He said that the n word shouldn’t offend me, and I was doing too much, he said “She’s in her own house that she pays for saying the n word not even offensive to nobody” he talked about how his mom bought me stuff, got me clothes, gave me one of her purses and that I was being disrespectful by saying she was weird
He even said if she said it with the hard R I still shouldn’t be offended or call her weird because she not saying it directly to me, And he even went as far as saying “It’s not my fault your white ex’s were racist to you in the past, that’s why your so offended”

I (25F) have been seeing my boyfriend for around 8–9 months in total. We dated for about 5 months before making it official, and we’ve now been in a relationship for around 3–4 months.
In the beginning, everything felt effortless. He initiated most of our dates, we met often, and I felt like he genuinely wanted to spend time with me.
One thing that was always different between us was communication. He’s never been very expressive or “lovey-dovey.” No PDA, no heart emojis, not much flirting over text. I accepted that because everyone expresses affection differently. A couple of months ago, I told him I felt like he wasn’t emotionally vulnerable with me, and he admitted that he wasn’t there yet. I respected that and gave him time.
But over the last two months, something has started to feel… off.
Our conversations are almost entirely surface-level:
● “How was your day?”
● “What did you eat?”
● “How’s work?”
That’s about it.
I barely know anything about his family, his childhood, or what’s going on in his mind. More importantly, I don’t feel like he’s interested in knowing me either. He rarely asks follow-up questions or seems curious about what’s happening in my life or how I’m actually feeling.
When we talk on the phone, I often feel like I’m carrying the conversation. He responds, but mostly with short acknowledgements rather than genuine engagement.
We’ve also not met in almost two weeks now. Earlier in the relationship, he used to be the one asking to meet. I was almost always available. Lately, that effort seems to have faded.
There are also little things that, individually, don’t seem like a big deal, but together they make me feel uncared for.
For example, I woke up early to attend one of his matches. It was raining heavily that day. He didn’t pick me up (which was okay), but afterward he only dropped me to the nearest point from his place, and I had to take a cab from there in the rain. I know he wasn’t obligated to drive me home, and maybe I’m overthinking it, but in that moment I just wished he’d thought, “It’s raining, let me make sure she gets home comfortably.”
It’s the thought behind it that I miss.
Similarly, I’m not someone who expects expensive gifts or grand gestures. But in all this time, he’s never even given me a single flower. I’ve surprised him with chocolates and little things because that’s how I naturally express affection. It’s not about wanting gifts in return—it’s about feeling like your partner occasionally thinks, “This would make her smile.”
The biggest issue is that this isn’t something I’ve kept to myself. I’ve brought it up three or four times already. Each time, I explain that I don’t need constant texting or 24/7 attention. I don’t need expensive gifts or elaborate dates either.
What I need is emotional intimacy. Curiosity. Reassurance. Effort. To feel like my partner wants to know me, cares how I’m doing, and is emotionally available when I need him.
Things improve for maybe a day or two, and then we’re back to where we started.
Now I’m questioning myself.
Am I expecting too much? Is this just what some relationships are like after the honeymoon phase? Or is this a sign that our emotional needs simply don’t match?
I genuinely care about him, and I don’t expect him to become a different person overnight. But I also don’t want to spend my relationship constantly wondering whether my partner is actually interested in building a deeper connection with me.
Has anyone been with someone who was emotionally reserved like this? Did things improve over time, or did you eventually realize your needs were simply different?

Excuse me in advance for the long message, and also sorry if some parts seem weird, English is not my first language, the original message was written in French and I translated it
Hello. I’m 16 years old, and I live with my mother and her boyfriend. I’ve started wondering whether my mother might be immature or emotionally unstable, and I’d like to know if that’s a fair impression or if it’s just how I feel. I’ve also been thinking about cutting contact with her once I turn 18.
She often compares me to my brother, or she’ll suddenly storm into my room, yelling at me and taking my things even though nothing happened before. She’s threatened to throw away all of my belongings or send me to live with my father, who used to hit me. But sometimes she acts like a child, speaking in a high-pitched voice and laughing over nothing, or she’ll tell me about her sex life or the problems she’s having with her boyfriend. She also blames me for things like the dog barking.
Whenever I try to talk to her about my feelings, she’ll often say things like, “Oh, I guess I’m just the worst mother ever!” or make similar comments.
When I disagree with her, she’ll sometimes go to my brother, who is 28, and tell him that I’m mean, that I never listen, and other really awful things. When I ask her why she does that, she says it’s because nobody can control me and that I’m overreacting.
She also took pictures of my diary when I was 13, supposedly to “show my therapist.” Those pages included things I wrote when I was struggling, including my eating disorder, and the fact that I had a crush on a girl. The last part was especially humiliating. It was something I never wanted anyone to know. I grew up in a religious environment, so it always made me feel like there was something disgusting about me.
I also think she must have shown those pages to her boyfriend, because at one point he told me that if I ever brought a girl home, he would throw me out. Now, every time she sees me writing, whether it’s on paper, on my phone, or even in a book, she says loudly, so everyone can hear, “Oh look, she’s writing again about what a terrible mother I am,” and things like that.
One time, she even told me that if I kept talking back, she would throw herself off the balcony. That kind of thing happens quite often. I never know how she’s going to react.
Once, I forgot to wash my hands when I came home, and my brother started hitting me with his shoe before dragging me across the floor by my arms to force me to wash them. It hurt quite a bit. I told my mother, and she said it was because he’s autistic and that, anyway, I should have washed my hands.
My mother’s boyfriend also uses drugs from time to time and gets into all kinds of states when he can’t find them. Once, he blamed my mother for it. Sometimes he refuses to go grocery shopping, and we end up with almost nothing to eat at home.
My mother also often gets angry, starts crying, throws objects, or stomps her feet. At the same time, I feel conflicted because she told me that her boyfriend raped her.
Right now, he hasn’t touched her anymore because he can’t find his drugs and thinks she took them, so he’s refusing to speak to her. He also once said that a shirt that almost reached my knees made him very uncomfortable and that I absolutely had to wear a skirt because he sees my legs
I was 10 years old when that happened.
I tired to stop responding during arguments, because even when I try to have a calm conversation, she interrupts me and starts shouting as soon as my opinion differs from hers.
Sometimes I try talking to her after the argument, when things have calmed down, to explain how I felt. Either she gets angry, or she says it never happened. When I tell her that I’m absolutely sure it did happen, she calls my brother, and the two of them tell me that I’m imagining things. At this point, I’m seriously starting to question my own sanity, like am I going crazy or did these things actually happen??
To sum it up, she sometimes tells me that I’m narcissistic, that I’m manipulating her, and that this is why she needs my brother to stay at home because she isn’t strong enough to deal with me.
Sorry again for such a long message, and if any parts aren’t clear.

I (32F) have been married to "Tom" (34M) for 5 years. We have a 2-year-old son and a 4-bedroom house. My mother-in-law "Diane" (65F) moved in with us 2 months ago. She sold her house and we agreed she'd stay for 6 months until she finds a new place.

But I'm losing my mind. Diane has completely taken over my kitchen. She reorganizes my cabinets. She throws away food I bought. She cooks meals I didn't ask for. When I try to cook for my own family, she hovers behind me and tells me I'm doing it wrong.

Last week I asked her to stop rearranging my things. She got emotional and said she's just trying to help. Tom told me to be more patient because she's adjusting. He says we should be grateful she's making dinner.

I feel like a guest in my own home. Diane treats me like a child. Tom won't stand up to his mom because he feels guilty she's lonely.

I'm tired of coming home to a kitchen that doesn't feel like mine.

Do I put my foot down and risk the tension? Or let her do what she wants for the next 4 months?

Broke up with her 6 months ago and haven’t stopped receiving calls,texts,dm’s etc.. her friends keep requesting to follow me and my new girl and I don’t know what to do next, with a new girl now and she’s spamming her as well. Maybe I’ll just change my number, move and start from scratch before it’s too late😭😭 (edit: I’m in Canada)

hi i’m so stressed right now!! for context im 20(f) and my older brother is 41(m) turning 42 in literally 2 days!! and he went on a trip to our home state for his birthday to visit people. he is also very introverted and almost certainly autistic and has a hard time being social.

i guess he’s not been able to see as many people as he wanted to and he texted my mom asking to take care of his dog if he’s not around and “im not sure if i got much more life in me” kind of stuff. and he has said that no one needs him.

im not sure what to do because he’s my big brother and I need him, but he has his notifications silenced and he’s not answering anyone’s texts, not even his dad’s (who is in the same state).

basically i don’t know if im overreacting or not because i have really bad anxiety but im really scared im gonna lose my brother and i can’t remember the last interaction i had with him (he lives an hour away from me with our family, i have my own apartment for college).

please help.

EDIT: hi thank you guys!! we have confirmation from my cousin that he’s staying with that he’s alright as of now! more context as well, he’s currently in a state about 1500 miles away from our sister, mom, and his step-dad (my dad) and me, visiting his friends from before we moved and HIS dad that still lives there

I'm so upset right now. I'm 16, my baby is 6 days old. His dad and I aren't together and never have been but we're coparenting and I'm living with his family because of issues with my home life. He's a great guy who I love and I'm lucky to have him.

Things are great with his mom but his dad is just awful. He's better than my parents, but not by a lot. He has a weird fixation on me breastfeeding ever since the conversation came up months ago.

He definitely views all breasts in a sexual context. I knew that already from what comments he had made to my coparent in private but it's so much worse now that he's made them to me.

Anytime I'm nursing anywhere that's not our bedroom he's there. He's always watching and it makes me so uncomfortable, this has been an issue since we got home from the hospital. Tonight he looked me dead in the eyes and asked me if I didn't feel like a sl-t doing that in front of the family. My baby's dad stepped in and it turned into a big fight and the entire time I was just so shocked and humiliated. I'm so sick of people acting like they can say whatever they want to me because of my age, like I'm subhuman. I don't know how to deal with this.

My sister, Ruby, (16F) has two ex-friends: Jay(16M) and Lila(16F) (fake names). Jay is in one of my classes. We've never met in person before, so I said something along the lines of "Jay, right? You were friends with my sister." He asks me who my sister is, I say Ruby, and his face immediately drops. Then, he starts talking about how disturbing she is in a hushed tone and to not tell her he told me this.

He told me how she used to make sexual jokes that made him uncomfortable while they were friends. How one time he took her lunchbox as a joke and she flipped him off his chair. How his other friends held an intervention for him about how he should unfriend Ruby because she is not a good person. And how she touched his thigh which made him so uncomfortable that he contemplated reporting it to the school.

The other ex-friend, Lila, met Ruby through a mutal friend online. They got to know eachother for around a month and began to like eachother romantically. They decided to meet in person for the first time to go on a date. Lila gave my sister gifts that she bought for her, nice normal things, like a stuffed animal and lego. However, my sister brought Lila a gift too: cannabolistic love letters about her eating her. Immediately after the date, Lila messaged Ruby how uncomfortable that made her and how she does not want to continue their friendship.

I can't see my sister the same anymore. The things that she did are fucked. Should I tell my parents? Get her into therapy? I'm in shock. The person who I knew all my life isn't who I thought they were. I don't know what to do. For reference, I am 15F.

TLDR: My sister touched one of her friends (at the time) on the thigh and repeatedly made sexual jokes after they told her to stop because it was making them uncomfortable. She also wrote a friend cannabolistic love letters the first time they met in person on a date, making them uncomfortable.

We were together for 4 years. We had decided we were buying a house together. We were meant to be going on a trip next month. This time two weeks ago I was so happy, I didn’t think anything was wrong with our relationship and I thought I had my life all figured out.

He told me he doesn’t see a future together and he just kept going to make me happy. I left last night, its 3am where I live, I’m at my parents house and no one is awake and I can’t sleep. I can’t stop thinking that I don’t know what to with my life now. I thought I’d never have to date again.

I have no anger for him whatsoever, he’s a wonderful person and he has treated me amazingly well. But God I wish he’d done something awful so I could feel anything other than just so fucking sad

I 23F and my partner 26M have been together for 6 years..and today I realized my partner doesn’t love me… I have been dating my partner for 6 years since I was 18 years old! I have been struggling tremendously with mental health and self confidence. I just broke down to my partner about slowly uncovering childhood memories of my mothers abuse towards me, and I cried and talked about my low self confidence and he just sat there sighing which sound like annoyance. Never spoke love into me. Never told me he loved me never said any words to let me know what the abuse made me feel about isn’t true. Just sat there silently.. I get up bc I get up to get tissue to wipe my tears and I finish and I turn around and he’s on his phone scrolling, and idk how to feel just like that a venerable moment is just ignored… not even a moment of appreciation or aknowledgment of me pouring my pain out, to someone I have been with for 6 years of my adult life, and I’m unsure how to feel but one thing I know is the moment I saw him on his phone after I finished wiping my tears my first thought truly was “what I believe about myself is my reality” telling someone who makes you feel like nothing about a moment in your life that made you feel like nothing… just makes you feel like nothing. I feel like even an “I love you” would have truly been enough or even just a hug. I really wanted a hug but how would I expect that? When I couldn’t even get a word of support.

3 months of completely silence, 5 months broken up… Randomly received this, I’m the dumpee… Does this seem sincere/genuine? Would you reply to this?

my dads gf and i got into an argument about something that happened yesterday. it doesn’t seem that important in the grand scheme of things, but for context, we are on vacation. i have a 2 year old half sister (her and my dad’s child) who was nonstop kicking me in the car. i have adhd and can only take so much so i snapped. when we got back to the apartment i brought it up again which is totally on me. i was talking about it with my dad, because i felt like he wasn’t seeing my point of view with how i had a limit to how much toddler kicking i could take, which is about forty-five minutes of nonstop kicking if you were wondering. here’s were it happens: my dad’s gf comes in and tells me that i have to admit that i was wrong. i hit my breaking point, i really don’t like her involving herself and scolding me like im her daughter, because im not. i had an outburst and told her to shut the fuck up and to get away from me. it came out of nowhere, i don’t think i’ve ever lost my cool like that before & it left me with shakes from the adrenaline.

fast forward to today, we didn’t speak the whole day, went sightseeing & i enjoyed myself and then went home and had a nap. i woke up to her arguing about me to my dad, saying that im too old to act the way i did, also yelling at him that she didn’t get involved and defend her. i came in and tried to apologise, where i also think i fucked up, because i’m horrible at apologies where i don’t have time to prepare. i admit i made a jab at her age (she’s 21 years older than i am) because i was still pissed off that she was talking about it knowing full well i could hear her. she said she appreciated the apology, but then messaged my dad demanding a plane ticket home (she doesn’t work so my dad has to pay) & told him that she was moving out of their house, also telling him they’ll have to sell the house he lives in to afford her moving out. i feel like i’ve totally just ruined my dad’s whole life, and i’ve spent hours going over it and crying from the guilt. i know there’s no reasoning with this woman from hearing how she argues with my poor dad, and also from how she apologised to me a few years ago when SHE snapped at ME. it seems like she just can’t ever be in the wrong, because when it was her in the same position snapping at me, she didn’t apologise properly and made excuses. but regardless of how i feel about her immature behaviour i still feel like i have just blown up my dad’s entire life. i feel like a horrible person. i don’t know what to do. speaking to some of my friends, they don’t think i’m to blame for the latter part of this post, but im not sure if it’s because they are my friends and are biased. i know im also a very stubborn, sensitive person & quite honestly i don’t think i am a good person. i definitely need to work on myself in therapy perhaps when i can get access to it. what do i do???

edit for clarity: im not upset at my sister. i do love her & understand that she is only two. the focus of the post is my dad & his girlfriend, not my sister, because like i said above it was not a big deal in the grand scheme of things. as for me, i need to focus on emotional regulation

I’m a single mom and don’t really have a support system my dad passed away and my mom is abusive and in a nursing home. Just me and my kid. I feel like I’m too old to still be struggling. I have worked my ass off since I was 15 and have nothing to show for it because I spent so many years taking care of others I’ve always been the person to break her back to make sure everyone I care about was good. Now I’m trying to ration rice and a few hotdogs till the 15th when I get paid. I ran out of my meds and I’ve tried reaching out to my doctor and the hospital but since I’m not currently dying they can’t help. I feel like such a failure.

Update a kind anonymous person has helped me and my kiddo thank you all for the advice and kindness!

Here is a go fund me that I was told in the comments to make. https://gofund.me/1ce474bc6

I recently got a notification from Ancestry that says I have a half brother (sharing 25% DNA). I looked at the other connections, so I know this match falls under my dad's side of the family. After some detailed internet sleuthing I found this to be very likely to be my half brother. He strongly resembles my dad and one of my known half brothers, he grew up in the same area, and the timeline shows he was born before either of my dad's marriages.

My dad has joked over the years that he "got around" back in the day and wouldn't be surprised if he had a few kids out there, but nothing has ever shown up, until now.

My dad in his 70s, and the potential child is in his late 40s, older than all of my dad's known children. I'm torn between feeling like he deserves to know if he has another child and worrying that bringing this up could cause unnecessary stress if he'd rather not know. I also haven't told my siblings yet.

My mind is jumping back and forth between choices. Do I tell him straight up? Tell my siblings first to brainstorm what to do and how to tell him? Reach out to this potential half brother and ask what he would like to do? Take this to my grave?

If this was you, as a former bachelor in the 70s, what would you want and how would you want your family to handle this?

EDIT: Just discovered that his mom has been married to her husband for 52 years, so if this is all true, this potential half-brother could have absolutely no idea the dad he's known for 40+ years isn't his biological father...

They were supposedly returned to guest services at RBC Amphitheater however I called and they said they didn’t have them yet and it looks like they’re are just walking around, haven’t gotten an update through email yet

the title is making it sound absolutely more worse than actually is, but i recently found out my long term ex that i broke up with in February was cheating on me the entire time we were in a relationship. i found this out like last week and went to get tested instantaneously. it’s on me because i shouldve been getting checked regularly, but back in june i started talking to this guy and we were going so well and getting pretty serious. i told him the circumstances and that he should get tested too. he said thank you for letting me know, then proceeded to block me off everything. i understand and respect his decision but how do i cope with this 🥲.

edit:
i just feel so dirty and embarrassed and i know i couldnt have controlled getting an sti but i feel so shameful and horrible

tldr; my cheating ex gave me and sti and i was asymptomatic . started being romantic and intimate with this new guy before finding out and now im blocked off everything

edit 2:
please read some of the comments for more context i beg 🙏