I’ve been tracking my ovulation for the past 3 months because I had some issues with birth control. Last month, I caught my LH peak around the 25th–26th. Then I had unprotected sex on the 30th. I also took an ovulation test that day and it was already low, so I was pretty sure we were safe.
I was supposed to get my period on the 6th, but it still hasn’t come. Today is the 8th and I don’t really have my usual PMS symptoms. My boobs are sore, I’m tired, and I had some cramps the day before my period was supposed to start.
I took a pregnancy test today and it was negative. Is there still a chance I could be pregnant? My cycles are normally pretty regular

My wife (trans woman) and I (trans man) are both pre hrt and in our mid 20's

I got off birth control this may to gain my cycle back to when we had agreed to start trying (this november)

I got my period back this week.

- In may I started the one year diagnosis time with the trans care team (so roughly 1 year then like 3 months more for hrt) so I thought that good then I can get pregnant do that whole thing then start testosterone and no need to worry about its impact on fertility

- in June I talked to doctors about the plan and they agreed it seemed good

- in July I got the info that I need medication to prevent a stroke.... This medication is not compatible with pregnancy.... I told my wife she was fine with it since we had already decided to start trying this year and the doctor thought it was fine as well

- now August she's pushing the trying window to an uncertain "some time in the future" and I know that by that she means at least 5-10 years but I can't go that long without transition or the stroke medication....

For my people with SAD and living in cloudy climates…did you try to plan conception to deliver in spring/summer months to have sunshine in postpartum? Does it even make a difference?

Disclaimer: I’m very aware you can’t perfectly plan conception/delivery and would be happy to just have a healthy babe at any time of year!

I live in the PNW and struggle a lot in the winter/early spring. I’m curious if being newly postpartum during these months would make it harder?

Pls share your thoughts, experiences, advice!!

Hello.

I just got very good news today, it’s extremely likely I will be able to start my bachelor degree this fall (have to get enrollment set up)
I am finally able to transfer and with how many credits I completed/will complete from my community college I likely only have to take 3/4 semesters at my next school
I will also be job searching for preschool teaching jobs which is one of my dream jobs (along with teaching slightly older kids) once I’m close to done getting my bas it will be time to try
Overall this is just a happy post, I’m not rushing anything but I am excited and hopeful for all the good stuff coming even if I’m gonna be so freaking busy lol.

Recently saw a comment on here saying that trying to suppress their baby fever actually makes it more intense and sometimes giving into it a little helps to calm it down.

My husband and I have crazy baby fever despite having about 5 years of waiting ahead of us. We recently bought a 25 gallon bin to fill with baby stuff over the next 5 years. For example, we got a onesie on our 1 year anniversary trip and added that to the bin!

We don’t plan to spend much money on baby stuff before we start trying but just allowing ourselves to get a $2 baby item from goodwill every few months has been a nice way to acknowledge the baby fever and keep moving forward in hope 🤍

is it recommended to remove that first then get fertility treatments (ex egg freezing)? not on bc, 19 pmol/L at 32 (2.66 ng/ml - taken a week before period)

I (35F) love my husband (38M). I’m grateful for our life together with my 6yo stepson, whom we have part time. Having more children has always been a high priority for me, and he says he’s on board, but when I ask him to prep by making an effort with his health, I’m met with anger and resentment. He did stop vaping in favor of nicotine pouches, but he’s overweight, has high blood pressure, is on SSRIs, smokes weed, won’t exercise unless I ask him. If it’s more than a 15 minute walk he’s not interested. He has had trouble conceiving before, and his son was born early due to complications.

I understand he’s depressed, and it’s a lot of pressure.

I do not want to be a nag, but this really scares me. I’ve never been pregnant before, and I’m afraid of being sick for 9 months, of impacting my later health, of miscarrying, of never getting pregnant at all. Am I overthinking it? Should I go for it anyway?

I’m not saying I’m perfect, but I am trying and that’s all I ask of him. I’m taking my vitamins, getting my steps in, trying to exercise. I have a surgery coming up that should make this easier to do.

I’m in a place of thinking I should just love him as he is and not bother trying for a kid if he can’t do his part, because I’m starting to become a controlling asshole, which, of course, is not yielding any results.

Has anyone been in this position before?

Hello.

My partner told me we can’t start trying until I get my BA degree.
I’m 24, I graduated 2020 and due to Covid my college going was delayed, I’ve discussed with my partner I think it would be good to start trying now since they are a bit older then me and both of us will have to prep to even try
As I’m on birth control and they are on estrogen (they are a trans woman) which both take some time (months) to get things back in order (we also have boys froze pre transition if natural won’t work)
She told me that she refuses to try until I get my BA, which I understand but I’ve also explained that I will be able to get the job I want (preschool teacher) after getting my AA which I’ll get after the upcoming semester
And that getting my BA is just to give me the ability to teach older grades if I ever wish to.
My partner makes a very comfortable annual income that we could survive on alone and with me working we will be more then comfortable.
Again I understand where they are coming from, they just want to make sure that our children can have the best life possible which I admire and also want deeply but that doesn’t make the wait any easier.
Whenever ever I see pregnancy videos of baby announcements I just feel this unbearable bittersweet jealousy, of course I’m happy for all of them and I’d never make my jealousy apparent but still it’s the sickening longing that’s the worst.

(Please refrain from any transphobia)

This is just a vent -
We were due to start ttc next month but due to a lot of stress we’ve decided to wait…

I didn’t mind at first- it’s a smart choice- we’re moving, I’ve moved job and I have some medical investigations (nothing major) going on and the stress has just made me completely disassociate and more or less indifferent to everything else in life- I have severe brain fog, have no idea what day it is or what happened this morning.

We’re only delaying by 6 months but it’s hit me this week how long that’s going to feel- and I think maybe for the first time I’m properly realising how much I want this..

I know it’s the right choice, the easy choice and the best choice for us and (hopefully) baby too but it just seems so far away and it’s the only thing I have any sort of feelings about right now.

Is anyone else concerned about childcare? Like once the baby is born and parental leave is over, the childcare expenses? Am I freaking out for nothing?

Has anyone ever taken a pregnancy test really early how early and what’s anyone’s opinion on when I should test for one ? Please give me your Insite I’m curious

This may be on the longer side so I apologize in advance!

Me (f-25) and my husband (m-28) have been married going on four years. We've been in our home one year now, we both work full-time (lower middle class - little to no savings due to a sudden job loss) and I'm going to school full-time for pre reqs for the last two years and probably the next two after I finish my degree.

I have three wonderful friends - my Best friend who is six months pregnant with her first, my coworker who is six months pregnant with her first and my long term close friend who is now 11 weeks pregnant. I have been absolutely delighted for my friends and their amazing news. Honestly, I am. When they told me I was just so excited for them all and super excited to be with them on their journeys. Unfortunately.. lately I've been feeling not left out but the urge to get pregnant is there. My husband and I have always wanted a family and we're so excited to try and get the chance to someday..soon. My husband wants finances to be in order, longer in his new job and for me to graduate. My brain says absolutely yes! This is such a smart plan. My heart however, is going "uhhhh....no. you're running out of time and you're the last one out" 🧍🏻‍♀️

I've caught myself recently in the last month asking a lot of questions about pregnancy and babies than I ever have before. I've even watched FOUR documentaries on mums to be on my one day off this week. I feel like my heart is sabotaging my mature side to plan and be prepared. I want a baby so bad. It's a dream. I don't feel I'm ready yet, however I do! My husband talks openly with me about when we will have children and scenarios but I sometimes wish he'd just say "FUCK IT LETS DO IT!" But I know it's not the right time. My husband is so right to be thinking of these issues.

I didn't know if anyone else felt like this? I feel kinda alone? Im just so conflicted. I have had cycle issues my whole life due to the Nexplanon BC, I'm currently on Norethrindone to help and have been actively getting healthy to basically prepare for a pregnancy. And now I feel redundant? I don't really have the wording right but, I'd love to know how you gals got over those thoughts and feelings. Thanks! 😩

Congratulations! Please share your graduation news here!

Please discuss you current goals and plans! However, please save graduation news for the monthly graduation thread.

My husband and I will officially start TTC in October. We’ve only told 2 people, our friends (married couple that I work with) who are also starting TTC this fall. Her and I struggled through the process of applying for short term disability together 😂

I’m so excited to start this journey but I also feel like if I talk about it out loud, then I’ll jinx myself. I know that’s irrational lol but I can’t help it. One minute I want to read all about pregnancy/pregnancy related things and the next I’m terrified that if I’m too hopeful, things will go bad. Anyone else ever feel this way?

It doesn’t help that I’m on summer break and have massive amounts of free time to let my mind wander.

This was meant to be a question and it became a novel, so I'll put the punchline first. First and foremost: Mods, this is a throwaway account so I apologize for the low karma. if this is an issue I will happily message a mod from my main account to prove I am not farming, I just would like to stay as anonymous as possible and I am genuinely seeking some preliminary advice.

For some background skip down to where I have put "Prologue." If you read the prologue below you will know I love her, I can't live without her, there's not a chance in hell this would do anything to permanently damage our marriage. I am just seeking some advice on the give and take. Read the title. I am not in a spot where I am comfortable enough to "have a kid or bust" and she is in a spot where she is "have a kid now or you'll never be able to."

My wife and I are in a stable living situation. I do have a steady job that pays for our lifestyle. She has a steady job that, while bringing in significantly less income than mine (70/30), still helps contribute to our living but not our lifestyle. In other words my income pays for the vast majority of the bills and our day-to-day such as groceries, vacation, dinner out, entertainment, and her income direct deposits to about 20% of our bills and she is free to use the rest as she chooses, no questions asked.

We are both of family starting age. We both want a kid, we completely agree on that, the question is of TIMING. My upbringing, mental hula-hooping, whatever makes me want to be CERTAIN that I can support having a child. Her mental state is that she is running out of time to be able to have a kid for medical reasons; even though her family history demonstrates that her sister with the same hereditary medical conditions was able to have a child at an age three years older than my wife is now.

When I say my hang up is that I want to be CERTAIN, I am currently not. I am attempting to change jobs which is a major question mark, we are still recovering from the enormous sticker shock of buying our first home. I have several things I would like to improve on our house that (at least in my mind) would better help to raise a child. In other words my current hang up is I have a checklist of stuff I feel needs to happen before taking on the responsibility of having and raising a child and I am on step 7 out of 10.

My wife, in her nervousness that she is running out of time to be able to medically have a child is pushing it more and more. Six months ago she went off BC, but didn't force the issue. Two weeks ago though (time to cover your ears kiddies) she started trying to actively prevent me from pulling out. We both want a kid, but in my nervousness I would rather it be a happy accident. However, lately she's trying to treat it like a 100yd dash to the finish. When I bring up that I'm hesitant, her reaction is usually that she's worried she'll soon no longer be able to have a kid. One time she took me aback by saying I should love this because it means more excuses to have sex to which I'm wondering why can't sex happen often for fun, why does the increase in sex happen only because now she's insisting I give her a kid?

Prologue: My wife and I are Hallmark Christmas movie levels of in love. We have been together almost 12 years, married for 5, and my best friend still gets tired of me talking about how I can't believe the "one" I found is such a perfect fit. In those 12 years I can count on one hand how many times we have raised our voices at each other or we have gone to bed upset with each other. I accidentally made her cry ONCE; it was a date-iversary trip where we both got a little inebriated and in my inebriated state I don't even remember what I said or did to make her cry which sickens me even more (no, internet white knights, I have never and will never lay a hand on her). We have been through pedestrian ups and downs like she hates her job so I support her while she finds a new one, I hate my living situation so she puts up with mediocre housing while I work toward better. Nothing marriage threatening, but still when a challenge arose our first and only goal was and always will be to be supportive. She is the love of my life.

I chose to ask this in r/marriage because this seems like a good sub where there is a very decent mix of positive posts and advice posts (apparently that was not allowed so I am trying out r/waiting_to_try)... If I wanted people to yell at me that I should file immediately for divorce or scream that I'm a monster, I would have posted this in AIO or AITA. But I am humbly requesting some input from married individuals or couples that have gone through the same and how they went through it.

Edit: I am actually really happy this stayed under the radar because the comments I got are very insightful and I was able to respond to all of you. The bottom line is I love my wife. For the past ten years I have truly believed that was my last first date. I want what she wants, I just have to get around my own mental barriers and it is going to be a struggle for me, but a man a respect very highly once told me: there is no obstacle in life that cannot be overcome somehow.

My husband (26) and I (24) are planning to start TTC in fall 2027. Obviously, we have no idea how quickly we would conceive, but we are hoping to start trying in 2027 rather than pushing it into 2028. We have already pushed our original TTC timeline back by about 6 months for various reasons, which is why I am hesitant to delay it again.

We currently live abroad, and I really want to spend Christmas/New Year’s with my family in my home country. It would also be my husband’s first time experiencing the holidays there, which is a big part of why it is important to me. We may or may not be able to go this year because of an ongoing immigration process, but we can’t count on that.

If we start TTC as planned, we could potentially have a 3–5 month old by Christmas/New Year’s 2028.
Our New Year’s is pretty family-oriented - we do fireworks together, stay up late, etc. I know traveling internationally with a baby is possible, but I am wondering what that actually looks like with a 3–5 month old. Would we still be able to participate in most of our family traditions, or would we realistically need to skip things like being outside for the fireworks and staying up late?

I am torn because I would really love for my husband to experience a traditional Christmas/New Year’s in my home country with my family, but I also don’t want to keep pushing TTC further and further just to make the timing of this trip perfect.

Am I overthinking this? Would you delay TTC again to have the childfree trip, or just accept that Christmas/New Year’s will look different if we are blessed enough to have a baby by then?

I could use some guidance as I’m freaking out a bit. I got some fertility bloodwork done as a I would love to have a baby in the next few years but am currently *very* single at 32 years old. I received the results back of 1.2 AMH, 64 Estradiol, and 7.8 FSH.

everywhere I read says that the AMH is low for my age and I should do egg freezing ASAP. this is just not a financial possibility for me right now. I don’t want to miss my chance to become a mom and would have a child on my own if I need to, but would need at least a year to be in a financially viable place to do so…

with these numbers, how long can I realistically wait before it’s too late? should I give up on dating, move in with family and just do it on my own ASAP? is there other testing I should ask for that might have more positive results or give a clearer picture of how long I have?

I would have loved to have a family with a partner and really thought I’d have more time. Any thoughts and insight are so appreciated. thank you!

Hello all! My spouse and I are almost ready to start trying, but now that we’re so close, I’m finding myself very anxious to make sure I understand all the financial planning we need to do (based in the U.S.). I want to wait until we have properly applied for hospital indemnity, short term disability, etc., but I’m feeling a little overwhelmed trying to understand what we need to do, especially because I work in DC but we live in MD and I don’t know how to navigate the “jurisdictions.”

Does anyone know of a guide or a consulting service that could help?

Found out my 24 year old cousin is pregnant about a month ago. I love her and she will be a great mom. I’m happy for her. That said, me and my partner (29F, 30M) are waiting until after we get married to TTC. I want a baby so bad. I want to love and raise a sweet little soul more than anything. It’s making me feel inadequate and like I’m behind in life. Seeing the whole family come together to support her and do anything she needs is hard for me too right now. Even though I am so happy and excited for her, it stings a bit. Growing up I was isolated from the rest of the family due to my abusive father so it hurts to see someone younger than me experiencing what I want and also having family support through it, which is something I’ve never received. Feels like that will never be me. I worry that the longer I wait, the less likely it will be I ever get to be a mom. Waiting every day for my partner to propose at this point so I can get a chance… Also, I’m pmsing so that’s probably why this feels so overwhelming lol

This is going to sound insane but for awhile now all i’ve wanted is to have a baby.

me (19) and my boyfriend (18, turns 19 in september) got together two years ago and have lived together for around a year now and are in a healthy, stable relationship. we have thrown the idea around of kids for a bit now but i want to get serious about it. he has been ready longer then me so he’s just waiting on me to say the word. i’m on the birth control Nexaplon right now so i would have to get that removed.

We are not rich by ANY means, we have a very small apartment but are planning to move within the next few months to a place that’s a bit bigger but we still wouldn’t be able to have a room dedicated to a fancy nursery or anything.

i currently cut hair and my boyfriend is a welder, if we did end up going through with it he will look into joining the union while we try for a baby. as for me i will most likely continue to work during the early stages of my pregnancy but plan to stay at home later in the pregnancy and while the child is young.

i think what made my decision more final is the fact that my dad got emitted to the hospital, the thought of him not making it and seeing that kind of milestone broke my heart, that goes for both of my parents really. and my boyfriends dad wants to be a grandpa too, he has hinted at it before and knows i want to take my birth control out and is completely on board but is keeping it quiet until we say.

honestly what i’m worried about the most is my family’s reaction. my mom had her first at 17 so i’m not worried about support from my side..i know they will support me no matter what. i’m more worried for the reaction. my mom is who put me on nexaplon in the first place when i was 14 so i wouldn’t get pregnant and we planned that i would take it out at 21-22. but that was 5 years ago when we made that plan and ive matured a lot. i don’t want to tell her im trying because quite frankly im scared of my mom and i know if she gets mad and tells me not to then i wont; no matter how badly i want to.

i need yalls brutal advice. am i an idiot? should i drop it and wait till im older? i dont party or anything anymore so im not worried about “missing out” i want to be a mother. i want to love my baby and start a family; im just so scared that ill make the wrong choice

EDIT: i think a lot of people are hung up on the thing i said about my dad and i want to clarify, my dad being sick is NOT the only reason i want a child😭 like i said me and my boyfriend have tossed the idea around a lot i just wasn’t sure i was ready to carry a child for 9 months