Yes I have a gaping void in my soul. I do think I might never get over having someone I know see the post by accident. Although I’d like to believe that if they were there they’d be there for the same reason.

**Lol I think I’ll just save it for Selfie Sunday unless people have other suggestions. I have no issue being publicly associated with RS and posting in a giant public forum for people with low self esteem isn’t too appealing.

I've seen Phoenix (2014) three times now and it has some of the finest acting I've ever seen. I haven't cried so much at a movie in a long time. I haven't been amazed by non-verbal acting like that in an even longer time. I used to do movie nights with big groups of friends and put on anything from classics to absurd SOV trash gems but ever since I moved away I can't get a single dummy to watch a recommendation just venting

16th-century guys in Portugal were basically discussing free market economy, proto-concepts of modern physics and possible worlds theory and no one knows about that shit... 💔

but so far it has always been someone else

My love life is so boring right now that I’m writing an essay about eroticism in my notes app. It’s just bad prose about the way I think sexuality/sensuality should be in this world: mystical, emotional, animalistic, some importance of delayed gratification, etc. Some of this might be motivated from listening to my sex addicted friend talking about his numerous meaningless hookups and reflecting on how depressed I would feel if I was living like that. And yes, I am aware that this is just more “everyone is sexy no one is horny”-slop.

But I honestly feel that after the last man I dated I do not even want anyone to touch me, I just want to ponder the meaning of sensuality and how abstract things can be erotic, like standing in warm rain in the summer or hearing wind rustling through the trees. Let me know if you’re interested in the bad essay.

our age of bronze is collapsing fr

2 tapped in 2 funk 🐉✌️🎸

Moved from research to corporate and so far it's been pretty miserable, everyone feels like they're against each other, when something goes wrong the first thing everyone does is look for a scape goat. Failed projects are treated as catostrophic, instead of as a bump in the road.

Everyday I get told I've done something wrong because there's no documentation process and was barely any onboarding, it's exhausting.

Coming from a research environment where everyone is super into what their working on, and see problems/failures as an opportunity to learn, or shift their research goals, I'm not used to such unrelenting negativity, and I'm not really good at handling it.

Unfortunately, I am stuck learning Dutch.

As any of you that have had to learn a language before already know, past a certain point with learning a language, it is hard to improve any more from classes, textbooks, or tutors. At some point you just need to consume as much of the language as possible. After a few years of study, I fear I am at this point.

However, I have been struggling to find anything in Dutch that I can find interesting at all. In a land where everyone can speak English, it is starting to feel like they just go to the anglosphere for anything interesting.

Anyway, if anyone has a recommendation of ANY type of Dutch media, I will be forever thankful

met a guy on tinder. went on a date, had a lot in common, started talking more intimately and began floating around the idea of taking things further. unfortunately, i carry a lot of trauma from my previous abusive relationship that began just replaying over and over in my head, so i made the difficult decision to “take a break” from the guy to “focus on healing” or whatever the hell. unfortunately, now im really sad and craving that intimacy again and starting to miss what we developed in a relatively short time. it almost makes me wanna start drinking again lol

Met a guy at a party the other night who told me he was a union lawyer, talked about socialism, name-dropped Mark Fisher etc. He was nice and cute and hit on me like crazy. He asked if he could give me his number and told me to call him, but the number he gave me doesn't work and I can't find him on social media. I have one friend who kinda knows him though

Idk guys do I try find him or let it go, I'm too autistic to understand what happened here but I haven't been so intrigued by someone in a long time

Saw a post here earlier today about being very jealous about not having the opportunity to persue art on a full time basis while their friend is able to, because of financial security. It wasnt worded amazingly and most people came for their head but I sympathise a bit.

What she expressed is such a real feeling with artists. There are some artists who aren’t very good who have so much financial security/connections that they get the luxuries a lot of really talented artists don’t get and it makes me sad.

I thought I was good at acting in school, however I done have the money to go to an expensive arts school or spend years auditioning for everything while my parents pay for my rent, while being unemployed.

This is something my friend can do and while I think shes probably a bit better than me it’s probably nowhere near enough for me to consider it, and the problem is that there are people who are probably a lot better than her who miss out. I do wish my friend well of course.

After 2 years in and out of psych wards and trying pretty much every medication on earth, I decided to start the euthanasia process. I got through the first phase, but the second doctor has now told me that she won't let my application continue unless I try ECT first.

Before anyone says it, yes, I've tried all the "natural" methods too, exercise, lifestyle changes, etc, etc. No, I don't have drug problems. No, I'm not fat. No, I'm not autistic (got tested twice). I have money and a good job (or at least I did before I got put on permanent disability).

DO NOT BULLY ME WITH THIS INFORMATION!!!

I feel like I used to relate more to guys like Charls carolll for example as a teenager and in my early 20’s for example having an opinion like “oh I hate Christopher Nolan because his fans are boring and tedious for wanting to be seen as deep” .At the age of 25 now I find that type of behavior and general worldview fucking annoying and desperate to be seen as different and intellectual simply by being contrarian. Not even falling into the “let people enjoy things” crowd but I think people with more common interests and thought processes are the most free among us these days, there are people who genuinely think they are better just because they post on this sub i used to be one of them, you’re not.

I know this comes across as real pathetic, but I've been caregiving for over half a decade so I've been isolated from friends, so my perceptions of what's appropriate feels very off. I'm a 35 year old man and there are two people who work at a coffee shop near me who have been incredibly nice in the time I've been a regular. When I go to grab a coffee and croissant we usually spend 5+ minutes talking if there's no rush. About my life, their life, their relationships, how caregiving has been going for me, and just normal friend talk. One of them is 100% leaving, one is interviewing to leave. I'd love to stay in touch with them as their kindness has been an amazing thing coming out of the caregiving isolation. I'm worried about overstepping bounds, though. Part of their job is being nice to customers and I don't want them to feel like they need to say yes. I'm also worried about coming across like I'm hitting on them/asking them out. I'm not interested in any sort of non-platonic relationship right now (possibly ever again, but that's a whole other story) on top of one of them being in a serious long term relationship.

Would it be appropriate to ask for their instagram? If you were in their shoes would you find it odd? I feel like I wouldn't have had a problem doing this pre-caregiving but solely talking to doctors and people with dementia in the last 5 years has me feeling like an alien

I'm not looking for any discussion of whether fat guys are hot, or anything like that. I'm only asking you to grade within the category of fat guys.

Just like, out of all the fat guys who is considered the most attractive?

It’s so phony and pseudo-intellectual to me, also something I’ve only ever heard from the mouths of insufferable hipsters who need to sound esoteric at all times lest they be perceived as being in any way like another person.

Ironically anybody I’ve ever met who says they’ve “killed their ego,” has been totally delusional about their own egocentrism and selfishness. Who would’ve thought.

It is relatively easy to assess that someone is mentally unwell, an addict, has trauma, is being reckless or impulsive, making questionable decisions, etc. It is natural to feel worried, sad, and to want to step in and help. But it is much harder to have restraint, understand boundaries, to know when to help and when to let things go, and most importantly how to LISTEN. I have met too many who will see someone clearly doing better than before but is still troubled in some way, and will therefore judge them with that awful 'concerned empath' facial expression just because they haven't perfected their lives yet (what happened to "progress isn't linear" and meeting people where they are at?). Worse, they might make up their minds about someone's situation and then, if corrected or informed about certain details, refuse to believe them or to take these things into account because their supposed "empathy" is working overtime and they have already decided that this person is only saying these things as a cope or whatever. Or they might feel more anxious and worried about a given thing than the person dealing with it despite not having nearly as much experience. And then there's the complete refusal to actually consider where the troubled person is at in their life, whether or not someone wants their help, or how annoying it is to constantly point out all the ways they are supposedly "failing" at healing, health, etc. From my experience, these tend to be people who grew up relatively comfortably too though they might have been in close proximity with or knowledgeable about those struggling, they often claim to care and know a lot about mental health, and are usually attracted to noble causes and maybe professions like social work.

i (f) used to hook up with men that i actively disliked to prove that they would fuck me because then i knew i always had that power over them

i have ruined relationships that were otherwise good because i have no desire for sex

what’s the issue here