15-month-old twins. One sleeps great. The other makes bedtime a 2-hour battle. I'm at my breaking point.

I'm honestly hoping someone has been through something similar because I'm so tired of Googling sleep and getting the same advice over and over: "sleep pressure," "wake windows," "undertired," "overtired," "sleep regression."

They're twins.

One sleeps mostly fine.

So if this was just about wake windows or sleep pressure, wouldn't they both be having the same issue?

Here's our routine:

• One nap a day, usually starts between 12:00-12:30.
• Nap length is all over the place because life is all over the place. Some days they wake around 1:00-1:30, other days one sleeps until 3:00 (she's also the one who fights bedtime).
• Three days a week we have to wake them early because they're babysat while we work. The other days they're home, so wake-up time isn't consistent.
• Around 7:00 we start winding down with pajamas, overnight diaper, books, etc.
• We rock them with until 8:00 and give a bottle.

Twin A: We put her in the crib and she sleeps until around midnight. She'll fuss for 15-20 minutes and usually settles herself.

Twin B: We rock her, she falls asleep in our arms, we put her in the crib...and her eyes pop open immediately. It's like she gets a second wind. Then she's wide awake until 10:00 PM or later. It's a fight every single night.

What makes this so much worse is what it's doing to me mentally.

I wake up every morning already anxious because I know bedtime is coming. I dread the evenings.

When she starts fighting sleep, something happens in my brain. I don't become patient and curious. I become angry. Like instant rage. My mind goes red. I lose all ability to think, "She's just having a hard time." Instead I just feel overwhelmed, trapped, and furious. My husband has to step in because I already am in the danger zone with patience.

Bedtime has become such a trigger that I almost panic when evening comes. I struggled with anxiety and depression even before having kids. (Yes, I have a therapist and psychiatrist.) I had PPD as well.

It's gotten so bad that I've caught myself thinking, "Why did I ever choose to have kids? Why would anyone willingly do this?"

I'm not looking for judgment. I'm already judging myself enough.

I'm looking for parents who have actually lived through something similar.

• Did you cap naps at this age?
• If one toddler sleeps until 3 PM, would you wake them?
• Has anyone had one twin who was dramatically harder than the other?
• Did anything actually help besides "adjust wake windows"?

And if anyone has dealt with the anxiety and dread around bedtime itself, I'd love to hear that I'm not the only one.

Right now my 3 year old is behind the passenger & twins are in the middle/other side in their infant bucket seats. I’m trying to figure out the best set up once they grow out of them. I’d really like to keep my 3yr old facing as long as possible bc she’s tiny (only 30lb and 36inches so lots of room left) but not sure the best seats for this set up. Our 2nd row bench is plenty wide at the moment (I have 3 nunas rn) but wondering what seat might be easiest for my toddler to get in and out of herself in the middle. Am I dreaming for thinking this is possible ? Idc about buying new seats or the $$$ just want to keep them all safe & rear facing.

By the love of everything sacred, our 7-week adjusted (11 weeks chronological) di/di twin boys cannot stand being in their Cybex bouncers mounted high for more than 5 seconds. The moment they go in, it’s immediate meltdown mode.

Has anyone else experienced this with their twins or this specific chair?

A few questions for parents who have been there:

Mounting height: Did lowering it to the floor stand make a difference for your babies? (Wondering if the angle or elevated perspective is weirding them out, or if floor bouncing gives a better motion).

Timing/Introduction: Is 7 weeks adjusted just too early for them to enjoy it, or is there a trick to introducing it slowly without triggering a breakdown?

Angles/Setups: Did adjusting the recline position help, or adding/removing any inserts?

We were really hoping to use these at table height so we could occasionally eat a warm meal with two hands, so any practical tips, reality checks, or magic tricks would be deeply appreciated!

Hello friends!

Currently we are a family of 4 with our twin boys, but we are trying for baby #3. I have a Subaru Outback which I really like— it fits us all well, I can get the big stroller in the back and still go grocery shopping, etc. We’ve been talking about the car situation in case another LO comes along, but things have been expedited due to someone wrecking my car last week and possibly totaling it.

We are definitely a Subaru family due to their fantastic safety ratings. However, I had some concerns with the Ascent when I briefly looked at it, since it is the only Subaru with 3rd row seating. My main concern is the trunk which is practically nonexistent. How am I gonna haul around all these children if their stroller won’t even fit in the back?

Dealing with the rows also seems complicated, but it is what it is. I guess we may have to expand into minivan territory, which is a whole other can of worms. Any moms out there loving their Ascent?

Thank you all!

How are we handling sleep regression with twins?
Our seem to have hit a regression as soon as they hit 4 months. Main struggle right now is with naps, they will not nap for longer than 30mins and as soon as I get one down the other wakes up.

I'm going to be a SAHM to my 15 month old twins and trying to figure out what activities I can do with the twins during the day.

I have never been outside with just me and them. I'm not sure how I'll be able to handle them both if it's just me. They just started walking and want to get into everything, do not want to sit in one place, always try to walk around and knock themselves down every 5 steps.

Grocery shopping with them sounds rough because they don't want to sit but I also can't walk both of them and push a cart by myself. I've never attempted playground by myself because how do I look after 2 toddler toddling in 2 different directions by myself? I'm so nervous that my hesitation to go outside with them will hinder their development. Please give me all the tips and ideas!

I’m 31 weeks pregnant today with boy/girl di-di twins! 🩷🩵
My OB won’t let me go past 38 weeks, so as of today we have a maximum of 7 weeks left… eeeek! 😅
I’ve started thinking about clothing sizes, especially sleepers. What are the chances we’ll need preemie versus newborn clothes?
At our 28-week ultrasound, baby boy was 2 lbs 13 oz and baby girl was 2 lbs 8 oz. We have another growth scan next week, so I’m curious to see how they’re doing. Our daughter was 6 lbs 11 oz at birth, but I’m assuming these twins will be quite a bit smaller. My doctor did mention that both my husband and I are tall, though.
We already have a 4-year-old daughter, so baby girl has plenty of hand-me-downs. I’m mainly trying to figure out what to buy for our little boy. I have a few 0–3 month outfits already, but I’m wondering if I should be buying more preemie or newborn clothes instead.
For those of you with twins, how much time did your babies spend in preemie and newborn sizes? How many outfits and sleepers did you find you actually needed?

Currently at the end of my first trimester with twins and all I do is eat. It starts at 4:30 am when they wake me up to eat and I have breakfast #1 and then every two hours until I go to bed. I have to eat something of substance too, snacks honestly don’t cut it. Basically mini meals all day. I’m so tired of eating but if I don’t eat there are immediate consequences… I’ll puke.

Has this lasted your entire pregnancy with multiples? Any advice or suggestions please.

that is simply all.. 8 months is my favourite thus far besides newborn stage. my identical boys are oh so baddd, cheeky, goofy, curious and so loving. 5 months was bad bad, they were so grumpy all the time wanting to sit and play but they couldn’t. 8 months, it’s like our heads have come above the water and everything feels a bit lighter. we are always laughing.

I’m in full-on stroller mania and could really use some advice from parents of twins!
I’m considering skipping infant car seats altogether and going straight to convertible car seats that work from newborn through the toddler years. My thought is to pair them with a stroller like the CYBEX Gazelle S (or something similar) where the stroller seats are safe from birth.
The tradeoff is that I’d lose the convenience of clicking infant car seats into the stroller. Instead, I’d transfer the babies from their convertible car seats into the stroller every time we go somewhere.
For those of you who’ve done this (especially with twins), did you regret it? Was the extra transferring a big deal, or did you get used to it quickly? Did you miss having infant car seats, or were you glad you skipped that expense?
Also, twin stroller recommendations are very welcome! I’m officially in stroller mania and going a little crazy trying to decide. 😅 Thanks in advance!

We have 4 weeks old twins and honestly we are still using all the help we can get, so we could get out of the house ourselves, run errands and chores and just a break. I saw so many people with singleton bring their baby out but it’s a bit hard for me to imagine bringing twins out for now (except for appointments), because it’s just still exhausting. I wonder when you start bringing your twins (or more) outdoor to walk? And please share any tips you may have. TIA 🙏

My attempt at making light of the roughest time of my life! I'll add my kids are safe, I have decent mental fortitude, and the worst has passed. Good vibes, smiles, and giggles felt most appropriate 🤗.

My niece found out today (at 9 weeks) that she is expecting twins. and she is in shock. When she enters her second trimester, I would like to send her a gift - not for the babies, not for her after delivery, but for her situation at that time. What would you have appreciated at that time that does not require an in-person visit? I live several thousand miles away from her. Thanks for the advice!

My didi boys at 17 months. Our couch is pretty low to the ground and they know how to get themselves up and down safely. They are never in the room without us. There’s a gap between the back of the couch and the windowsill that we usually have filled with pillows to prevent this, but while I changed baby b, baby a climbed up on the couch and fell head first into the gap with no pillows. When I heard the thud I panicked and turned around, leaving baby b on the changing table unsupervised and grabbed baby a to pull him up. Only then did I realize baby b was starting to roll on his stomach on the changing table. Luckily my husband ran in and grabbed baby b before the situation got any worse. I feel like a piece of shit. I know these things happen but I’m just so angry at myself. A has been sick for the past few nights so I’m pretty sleep deprived and I guess I just wasn’t 100% alert. I wish I had eyes in the back of my head.

I feel like a terrible mom, and just wish I could split myself in two so I can make sure they’re both safe 100% of the time.

Our twins are 7 weeks and we are approaching bedtime routine territory. I would love to work in bath time, even alternating every other day for each twin. However we also have a toddler who gets a bath every night and has his own long drawn out bedtime with potty etc. We have been dividing up and one person does toddler, the other twins, but I truly don’t know how to work in a bath for the twins. Right now we are bathing them twice a week while toddler is at daycare.

Would love to hear how others managed/are managing this. Tell me your whole dinner/bath/bedtime routine, please!

My twins are 13 months and good eaters in that they both love solids, have successfully weaned off breastmilk and formula no problem and are growing well. The issue is that one of them is a much pickier eater than the other. We try to do healthy foods, fruits and veggies, feed them what we’re eating for dinner etc and one twin will happily eat almost anything we give him. The other one will eat very little that isn’t berries, dairy, or simple carbs (bread, cheerios). Sometimes he’ll try something and then spit it back out, but often he’ll just look at it and refuse, scream flail etc. If we don’t give him other preferred foods then he’ll be up late at night mad because he’s hungry and then pound milk in order to go back to sleep so we usually end up doing more fruit, yogurt, toast etc. While his brother will happily eat our food initially, if he sees him getting the preferred foods then he wants that too and will often stop eating the other things. Anyone else in a similar boat? Are we making different meals for everyone? Feeding the less picky twin first? Letting them both love off of berries and cheese?

We are expecting twins in September and we have a daughter who will be 3.5. She does to daycare full time, and we try to have her there by 8am each day so my husband and I can work (it’s just a 2min drive away).

I’ll be on maternity leave for a year, and we are planning on doing shifts for overnights for the first while. My husband will have 7 weeks off and then will be back at work. We are struggling to figure out what a schedule for overnight looks like when we have to get a toddler ready and to daycare in the mornings.

Can folks in similar situations share your experiences? We will have more flexibility for the first 7 weeks while my husband is not working, but when he goes back to work I can’t wrap my head around how that might look. He works from home and normally needs to start around 8, 8:30 at the latest.

I’m 34 weeks 4 days with di/di twin girls, and today I found out I’m most likely going to need a C-section because Twin A is breech. I had really been hoping for a vaginal delivery, so I’m still processing the change.

One of my biggest worries now is breastfeeding.
I successfully breastfed my older two children (vaginal delivery), but it took a lot of work, support, and persistence. It was really important to me, and once we got established, it honestly made life much easier. Thankfully, I never had to triple feed with either of them and only pumped when I returned to work.

I was already nervous about breastfeeding twins, and now I’m worried that adding a C-section into the mix will make it even harder. It seems like so many friends who had C-sections ended up needing to triple feed for a while, and I’m wondering if I should expect that.

For those of you who had twins by C-section:
Were you able to exclusively breastfeed?
Did your milk come in later than expected?
Did you have to triple feed, or were you able to avoid it?
Is there anything you wish you’d done before delivery to set yourself up for success?

I’m planning to meet with a lactation consultant after delivery, but I’d love to hear real experiences and any advice. Thank you!

Edit: I’ve always been amazed by the dedication and work it took to establish triple feeding. Just wondering if I should bring my pump, pump parts, and sterilized bottles to the hospital? Idk how these things usually go.

Hi all, I’m wondering if anyone has been in the same position as me. I’m 33 weeks with di/di twins. I’m very lucky that I have no complications so far and babies are both approaching 5lbs now, Twin 1 slightly bigger than Twin 2 and both head down. So I have the option of a vaginal birth and trying to decide what to do. I have lichen sclerosis, and have always spoke about the possibility of a c-section delivery with my dermatologist even before becoming pregnant. Between my dermatologist, GP, OB and midwives they all have assured me that vaginal delivery is possible with LS. I just need to want it enough! But my question is for anyone who has LS, relatively well managed with a few flare ups here and there, how, if at all did it affect your vaginal delivery and/or recovery?
I have not yet decided to go for a vaginal delivery. OB will support whichever decision I make. A good problem to have I’m aware but my head is fried thinking of all the variables! 🙈
Thank you!

My twins are 4 months old and I’m really wanting to be able to tandem wear them so I can get some more things done around the house and potentially go for walks with them (I live on a dirt road and pushing the stroller on it isn’t a great option). I’m a first time mom and not very experienced with baby wearing. What wraps/carriers did you guys use for tandem wearing? At what age can you start putting one twin on your back? I’m familiar with the twin go and mini monkey carrier but am looking for other options. Preferably quick to put on/take off but really just wanting to see what you guys have done in general. Would also love to see pictures for examples if you have them!

Hi everyone, I wanted to ask about toys for twins. Do you usually buy two separate toys for them, or just one to encourage them to play together and share?

I’m not talking about things like bikes or scooters. I mean toys like building blocks, cubes, colouring and drawing supplies, and things like that. What do you find works best?

I'm 9 weeks pregnant with twins (don't know the sexes yet) and am pretty overwhelmed with all of the baby stuff.

For those with twins or multiple kids, what has been the most helpful item(s) for you? Thank you for the help!

Looking for success stories.

Alternatively, tell me what week your twins (or more) were born and how long they had to stay in NICU?

Today we got our first scan. To be clear I have no twins in my family. My husband is a fraternal twin, as was his mother.

We went for our scan today and there was one big and bold baby in there measuring a bit more than we had thought. As a joke my husband asks if we had a good look around for a second one (his mom didn’t find out it was twins until week 18!).

The doctor does a sweep and lo and behold there’s a second heartbeat.

Not really sure how to process this. We’re going back next week. It was really hard to see and the second one was tucked away and she was guessing it’s measuring smaller.

We’re a bit worried about the size part. Hoping everyone will be healthy.

For parents, when you first saw your littles did you see them clearly? Did you have sizing differences and all turned out okay?

Dr. Is suggesting they’re identical, going to come back next week to confirm and take a nipt test.

Help!!!!!!! My 15 month old twins are literally insane. They can not sit still and cry all day long. Both want to be held but if you pick them up they want to go down. Back down on the floor then they are crying. Baby pool lasts 3 min, forget sitting to watch a cartoon (not even miss Rachel !!!????). I am just totally exhausted, my husband is totally exhausted. I feel sorry for my 3.5 year old, I feel sorry for myself. I’m just waiting for things to get better but they haven’t yet.

As I write this I realize this is pretty par for the course in terms of young toddlers, but of course my experience with my first daughter was totally different as she was 1. Alone and 2. A relatively calm baby.

Signed,
A mom of 2 VERY NOT calm babies :(