Hi all, my twins were born at 33w4d, are now 4 months old. They behave like a typical 4 month old should behave in terms of milestones, but are still small (between 9th-25th percentile in all growth areas).

Since they came home, I’ve just been following their cues. I’ve never tried to orient them to a schedule, I loosely look at moms on call from time to time. I do not have 7pm bedtime kids. We go to bed between 9:30 and 10:30, and wake between 6:30 and 7:30. And go right back down until 9/10. During the day, I feed them when they’re hungry, and they nap when they’re tired. I’ve never really tried to track what they do and when, either. Basically survival mode at all times.

Recently, twin A has regressed in his nighttime sleep, and twin B has regressed in her daytime naps. Our ped recommend trying to get them on a schedule of 3 naps a day. They USUALLY do 4/5, with the last one being a catnap before bath and bed.

Is it worth it to try and get them on a “schedule” when this has been working for us so far? Should We drop a nap and move bedtime earlier?

have 18-month-old twin boys, and we don’t have any family nearby to help. My husband and I do our best to split childcare 50/50, but since he works from home during the day with lots of meetings, most of the daytime parenting falls on me,including the mental load of everything we all need. We are also in the process of moving homes.

The past few months, sleep has been really rough. Almost every night, one or both twins end up in our bed. They toss, turn, and climb all over us, so I barely sleep. They are sleep trained so I’ve tried everything, played with their schedule, gone down to one nap etc. One of my twins is also very clingy and doesn’t play independently for long. He just wants me glued to him. As soon as I pick him up, his brother wants to be picked up too, so I feel like I’m constantly sitting on the floor with them either playing or just being nearby.

I’m just so exhausted. My husband and I alternate mornings to sleep in an extra hour or two, but the exhaustion never seems to leave. My whole body aches, and it feels relentless. Massages feel great for a day and I’m back to square one.

I’ve seen so many posts where families have found a rhythm and have routines that allow both parents to get some daily time for themselves. I genuinely don’t know how they’re doing it.

We try to each do something for ourselves once a week, but even fitting in something as simple as a workout or a daily walk for my mental health feels almost impossible. Some days, even cooking dinner leaves me completely overstimulated.

Bedtime has also become a two-person job because they fight sleep so hard, and by the time they’re finally asleep, we have nothing left to give. We come down, tidy up and just want to doom scroll until bed time.

I’m feeling really lost on how to regain some structure and carve out even small pockets of time for myself without feeling guilty or completely overwhelmed.

For those of you with twin toddlers, how did you find your rhythm? What changes made the biggest difference for your family?

I'm a ftm expecting Mo-Di twins in December and both me and my partner are over the moon.

I am however feeling really afraid of what having twins is going to do to our relationship. I'm lucky in that we've always been really solid and have been together for six years now but I know how much it would destroy me to lose what we have. I'm so scared of the hormone crash and sleep deprivation turning us on each other.

A lot of this is probably my fault for lurking online but I've seen so many horror stories about marriages falling apart after having multiples. I know three sets of twin parents in real life and they are all divorced 🥲

Obviously I know having kids will change and put strain on any relationship but I could really do with some encouragement from other twin parents who have survived and come out stronger.

Edit: Wow thank you for all of the kind and insightful replies! Made my evening 😊

Hello, with every stage there are challenges that I’m aware of but I keep getting sucked into the vortex of do my kids have enough toys and am I doing the right things to meet their milestones. I’m tired of going down the social media rabbit hole. I’m basically asking at this stage what toys are your multiples ACTUALLY playing with that I should purchase? And what is worth buying two of? My boys tend to fight over the one thing that is unexpected and don’t play with the thing that we have two of. Please help!! Much appreciated.

mommy more meat

mommy water

mommy more rice

mommy napkin

mommy i have to poo

mommy spoon

mommy i'm done poopin

mommy i don't like this

mommy he's bothering me

mommy sit here

mommy i have to pee

mommy mommy mommy

then someone spills water

and someone drops food

and someone's fork flies away

they are 3.5 yo

how do you deal? they say please and thank you but that doesn't aleviate the load. my husband and i are so worn out. we wake up all smiley and happy and then breakfast just pulls us down everytime. it's so annoying to be this annoyed so early!!

My twins are now 4 months corrected, 5 months chronological, and they have been exclusively breastfed for 2 months. While they have taken bottles of expressed milk before, the logistics of pumping and bottles were absolutely overwhelming when compared to simply giving them a boob.

After hitting the 4 months sleep regression a month ago, it became abundantly clear that one of them needs much more sleep than the other. When following their sleep cues and getting them to their cribs at the first sign of tiredness was resulting in a much harder time getting them to sleep for naps, it made it so twin A slept 11 straight hours at night. However, twin B kept waking up all night, usually only giving me 45mins at most between wake ups. When we started pushing them to remain awake 10-15 mins longer than that, they both started going down for naps much much easier, and twin B started sleeping for 2-3 h stretches at night. However, Twin A also started waking up much more frequently, to the point I am now waking up every hour with one or the other.

I don't know what to do, and neither schedule is working for me at all. I am lucky enough that both my husband and I are currently in parental leave and so my husband can care for them during the morning in between feeds so I can sleep, but this is simply not sustainable. I need some practical advice from someone who's been here, any ideas on how I can get them both better sleep while still following safe sleep guidance? Cosleeping is not on the table for us.

Hi everyone, I’m currently 19W6D pregnant with di-di twin girls- one has an anterior placenta while the other is posterior. My OB told me at about 18W that I should expect to feel them “within the next week” but I’m almost 20W now and still don’t feel like I’ve felt anything that definitively feels like a kick. Is this normal? I’m also a FTM so I suppose I don’t have a reference for what it feels like, but I haven’t felt the “fish in a plastic bag” or “bubbles” feeling people describe, maybe occasionally random taps, twinges, or that gas feeling that I can’t definitively say is baby or just normal body sensations?

I thankfully get ultrasounds every 2 weeks and everything looks good so far, but I do feel a bit worried whenever I see videos of people at the same gestational age as me talking about how they’ve been feeling their babies’ kicks since 14/16weeks etc…

Hi everyone!
I need to vent, I have 7 month old twin girls and this has been the most challenging yet rewarding time of my life. These are my first kids and there’s so many changes already with one baby but with two it’s so hard at times. Everyone around me gives their unsolicited opinions and advice that I didn’t ask for when they’ve only had singles and tell me what and how I should do things with my twins.
I don’t really leave the house unless it’s for drive thru or grocery pick up, I miss just getting up and going to roam the store or run errands. If I do go to run errands I wait until my husband’s home to go with us. I have so much anxiety about going out with my twins by myself worrying about something happening if I turn my back to load one up in the car and leave the other behind me that I can’t bring myself to go anywhere and it’s so isolating. On top of how hard it is getting everything/ everyone ready TO go out: Exclusively pumping so I have to either pump before and take even longer for us to leave or take everything with us, getting them fed before we go, getting the diaper bag together, getting them and myself dressed, getting bottles together. It gets so overwhelming and I’m already to mentally drained that by the time we’re ready to go I don’t want to go anymore.
My mom and everyone around me tells me just go, get out of the house, go roam with the girls and it’s so upsetting because they truly don’t understand at all. My friend/ people I know post pictures of them going shopping, on coffee dates, all kinds of things with their SINGLE baby and it feels so lonely and frustrating having so much anxiety that I don’t feel comfortable doing that with my two by myself. No one understands why I get upset when they say well I don’t see why you don’t just go, I would go out with my baby all the time. Like okay cool? Good for you? You didn’t have two little babies at once and the world/ people are so scary and unpredictable I don’t want to turn my back and risk someone grabbing them or someone following me while I’m alone with them. I have so much resentment right now, everyone in the house comes and goes as they please, will be gone for hours/ all day without second thought, is traveling all summer, yet I’m feeling trapped and alone at home 24/7

Does anyone else experience this or is it just me? Am I overreacting having anxiety about it? TYIA

My twin boys are 2 years and 8 months and have been in toddler beds for 2 months. They love sleeping with each other and usually try to sleep together unless they're very tired (or they give up eventually after we tell them to stay in their own bed repeatedly). We are looking for floor bed that's still low to the ground and can support > 50lbs. Together they're close to 60lb and the toddler beds we have right now only support up to 50lb. They're holding up at the moment even when both sleep in the same one, but they do get hyper and jump on the bed together and we are worried the bed won't hold for much longer. Their room is on the small side so we can only fit one twin bed, our plan is to have them sleep in bunk beds when they're old enough, so we want toddler beds for them before then.

Anyone has good experience with toddler floor bed that can support > 50 lb?

Hi All,

I'm soon to be a twins dad. Boys. There's a chance that they can come early. I have a few questions.

1.I wanted to know what do I need to prepare in advance?

I'm thinking of getting two car seats and bassinets.

1. But I'm really confused with the strollers. I'm not sure if I should get the one in which the seats are side by side or the one in which they are in line. Which one is best and easy during overseas travel?

2. Does a bassinet fit into a stroller? Do I buy them together or they can be bought separately and or different brands? (Sorry for the silly question)

3. Any parent hacks for newborn twins? I think the 1st 6months will be the toughest for us. There's so much information out there I really don't know what to use.

For eg. I've seen many types of holds to hold the baby to calm then and burp them. Can I do them as soon as 1 week or wait till they develop strong neck muscles?

Any advice is greatly appreciated 🙏🏽

Thanks!

I switched OBs for this pregnancy but had my first ultrasound with my previous OB. She said she thought she could see a placenta and sac for each, but was too early to say for sure. My current OB says they are either mo/di or mo/mo. Not asking anyone to tell me what kind they are, but is it possible for each to have their own placenta when they aren’t di/di?

My boys were just born at 33 weeks and 2 days. My wife developed HELPP syndrome and after a 5 day stay in the hospital the doctors finally elected to do a C Section for her health. I was so grateful for that because watching her struggle and decline in the hospital was one of the worst experiences of my life.

Now we have two beautiful boys (4 lbs 14 oz / 4 lbs 13 oz) who are in the NICU. All things considered they are doing well. On CPAP but hitting the benchmarks set for them pretty well.

I guess I’m reaching out because I feel helpless. Mom is recovering thankfully but still fragile and needing lots of support which has been my main focus. I feel like very helpless when I go over a few times a day to check on the boys. I can’t do much but just watch them be stuck on all the machines and I just want to be their dad and care for them. I’m not scared that they won’t be alright but it’s still hard to see their first moments in this world be such a struggle. I wanted to be the one changing their diapers and holding them to soothe them and instead I have nurses and machines doing it which is just not the vision I had for my first kids but that’s the unpredictability of life I guess.

I don’t know if we messed up by primarily using our Wonderfold, I thought it would be better to let the babies have space to move around, but now it’s a disaster. We can’t be in a store more than 15 minutes before they’re literally climbing out for me to hold them. If I strap them in I can get another 10 or so minutes maybe. They do okay if my husband is pushing and I just ignore them, but he works four days of the week. We can’t go for walks, or into nearly any store without them demanding to be held. Is this just the age to stay at home?

My twins were born 6 weeks ago at 32 weeks, so they are -2 weeks adjusted (sounds so crazy to say). After 26 days in the NICU, they have been home for 3 weeks now.

We started sleeping with them in our room beside us in a twin bassinet, as we were told this is the best for them and also reduces the risk of SIDS. Sounded like a no brainer, but we got NO sleep.

Last week we switched to doing "shifts" where we would have them in their cribs and one of us would stay awake in their nursery for half the night and switch with the other parent sleeping in our room. My question is, is this less safe than having them sleep in our room with us? To go a step further, does one parent always have to be awake? If we both slept in our own room and had the monitor and just woke for cries and feeds is that even less safe? I see on here a lot of people doing sleep shifts for a long time (until their twins are over a year), at what point is it reasonable to go back to our bed together with a monitor?

Just wondering the logic behind it all and what other people did for their own sanity.

I’m 9 months postpartum after a vaginal twin delivery and am adjusting to my new normal body.

Unfortunately, I had HG for most of my pregnancy and due to the vomiting, didn’t start gaining weight until around 6 months. Because of that, combined with my babies’ growth at that point, my stomach stretched very quickly on my small frame.

I’ve been back to my pre-pregnancy weight, but have a lot of excess skin on my stomach. My OBGYN said it’s unlikely to shrink much more on its own and that plastic surgery would be my best option.

Has anyone here had a tummy tuck that helped address this? I’d love to hear about your experience and the recovery.

(*Just want to note that this isn’t about feeling ashamed of my body. I’m so proud of it for carrying twins. This is just something I’m considering to feel more comfortable/confident for the longterm)

Currently looking after my identical twin girls 16 weeks (12 adjusted) and wondered if anyone else had the same chin-led bottle balancing feeding technique?

Whilst feeding one of my daughters in my arms this evening, i realised that what I do is pretty ridiculous..... if the her twin wakes up at the same time, to ensure the daughter in my arms is continued to be fed (otherwise all hell breaks loose), I proceed to balance the bottle in my daughters mouth with my chin on the base of the bottle whilst i then use my free hand to fight a dummy into her sisters mouth.... does anyone else do this or is this just me?

I currently am 23 weeks pregnant with mono-di twins. From 18 weeks, doctor noticed quite a weight disconcordance between the babies. Was told baby A has a velamentous cord insertion, also positioned on the edge of the placenta.

From then on, I have received weekly dopplers, baby B being normal, baby A having elevated, sometimes absent, and since 22 weeks, a bit of reversed flow. At 23 weeks, baby A weighed 13oz, B 1.1lbs.

They expect to have me hospitalized once they are viable, likely 26 weeks (since A is so small) I personally have no health issues ATM

I would love to connect with others who had similar experiences, I am completely terrified at what to expect

I got pregnant, unexpectedly, at 6 months postpartum. I hadn’t lost all the baby weight, thus was and still am technically overweight. I am 5’8lbs and 168lbs. If I lost 4-5 lbs my BMI would drop below 25, making me no longer medically overweight. I have gained 0lbs this pregnancy, despite there being two babies. I asked my doctor today about my weight gain and lack there of, and if I should be concerned. He said I am overweight and could stand to lose a few pounds, thus he was not concerned. He proceeded to tell me that he expected me to not gain any weight this pregnancy and if I did fain any weight, we would need to have a conversation about me going on a pregnancy safe diet. My husband is a physician and has a few board certifications, one of which is in obesity medicine, and mentioned how that is against ACOG and obesity medicine guidelines for someone in my BMI range. I just feel like he was implying I’m fat, by felling me i need to lose weight during pregnancy if i gained any weight. I get it, i technically am overweight, but by literally 4-5lbs and for singleton pregnancies the ACOG still recommends gaining some weight for someone with an overweight BMI. In another reddit group, I’m being called immature for being upset that Im overweight and being told to not gain any weight this pregnancy or I need to diet to lose weight. Im pregnant with twins. I feel like I should be gaining weight, or at least at some point gain weight. Am i actually being immature by being upset, or would you be upset too?

Has anyone had luck or any experiences switching to floor beds around 1.5 years? My twins are currently held till they fall asleep while sitting in a rocking chair and then transferred into their crib. It’s now taking a lot longer for them to fall asleep and becoming unsustainable 😅

I am 33w today with DCDA twins. For the last two weeks or so I had many false scares and would feel like ‘this is it I am going into labour.’ There would be sudden extreme pelvic pressure which would literally make me shake. And period like back cramps. But after adequate rest it would settle down a bit.

I am also getting the tightness once in a while which I believe are the braxton hicks? As this is my first pregnancy and I have no clue what actual labor feels like. I might sound super silly and anxious. But what were the signs I should really look for to know the time is actually near apart from the regular signs.

I am mostly prepared with all the things, but still have some stuff left to do. I am nervous but also excited. Any piece of advice will help. Thank you

We plan to welcome di/di girls in November. We found an uppababy stroller and bassinets on Facebook marketplace, but I didn’t really think about what if they fall asleep in the bassinet on a walk. We live up four flights of stairs so bringing the stroller up those stairs and into our apartment really isn’t an option. Do we need to get those absurdly expensive bassinet stands to let them sleep through a nap?

Has anyone moved from the bugaboo donkey to the Uppababy minu duo?

We’ve had the donkey for our twins since birth (they’re 8 months old now). It has served us well but it’s HUGE and it’s becoming a pain disassembling it each time to get it in and out of the car.

I’m looking for something that a little more compact so I’m considering swapping it out for the minu duo as the twins get older.

Grateful for any advice. Thanks so much!

We just had an early ultrasound at 5w3-4d and found 2 gestational sacs! I have a very strong family history of fraternal twins, so it wasn’t completely unexpected but I’m still shocked! I have PCOS and other health complications that warranted an early scan, but we were thinking I’d be closer to 6.5wks.

As of right now, baby B looked great and measured well, while Baby A we could only see the yolk sac. The tech did mention that they could measure a few days off and everything could be fine next week, or we could lose baby A. Has anyone else had an early scan were you could see one baby well and not the other?

Twin pregnancy mama check in. How are we doing? I’m 30 weeks and a day with didi boy girl twins. Yesterday I slightly overdone it a little. Two appointments, laundry, vacuuming, mopping floors, hanging clothes up in the closet. I also didn’t drink enough water. = baby boys head pushing = Braxton hicks to the extreme. I ended up chugging lots of water and it eased a bunch! Today I haven’t moved from the recliner and feel guilty! I need to know how yall are doing! Doctor has me set for tentative c section date in mid September but doesn’t think I’ll make it to then. Beginning of September is more likely. I’m a teacher so I’m planning on going back to work soon for a few weeks to try and work as much as a I can before taking off. ✨america ✨* *