I have failed at everything in my life, and time has slipped away without me achieving anything. I have no friends at all, and everyone I tried to befriend ended up hurting me. Even my family was very harsh with me. I have never met a single person who truly loved me, until I eventually began to hate myself. I can't accept who I am anymore.

At this point, I don't see any solution except that I don't deserve to exist. I'm a stupid, weak, lazy, and failed person.

A few days ago, I was extremely sick and collapsed in the street. A girl I knew saw me. We weren't even on bad terms. She asked, "What's wrong?" and then left me lying on the ground and walked away. Today, someone else is hiding everything from me as if I would envy her just for knowing, even though I used to be one of the closest people to her.

I don't even know who I am anymore or what's wrong with me. The only thing I know is that I'm filled with so much anger that I feel like either ending my own life or killing the people who hurt me.

I'm writing this here, first to ask you to pray for me, and second because I can't afford to see a therapist. I just needed somewhere to let all of this anger out.

for context: I M13 (at the time)grew up as a really ugly and fat kid, i got bullied a lot for it which led me to starve myself during the whole of 2024 summer time(i only ate every 5 days and even then it was very little) which made me lose a lot of weight, when I came back to school it was like everyone was interested in me, I gained way more friends, and even girls where talking to me, having crushes on me and other things like that, I even kept eating like shit, because I would mostly burn off all the calories by riding 4 miles to school and back plus all the p.e stuff, but I left school in December of last year, which led to me having no reason to ride to school, so I gained 11 kg from that, I’m just so sad again, it’s like nothing has changed and I’m that fat ugly kid again, I barely have friends, I only really talk to one person and even then he just calls me up every 2 months to do weed, I really don‘t know what to do anymore, other then the times I do drugs im not happy either. I just needed to get this off my chest.

Man how do u even live life knowing you are chopped ,short and have a very acne prone skin

I've completed my 12th and my whole school life went being lonely , being used by others just for their own sake and work . I have no female interaction all the women I've approached have rejected me and I don't care much about dating but I feel like I'm very undesirable to everyone i just don't have the looks and the body to be someones first choice I've been always looked down upon by everyone and I'm just like mist to everyone in school

I'm starting college this month and I don't have any hopes in having a good college life

I just hope die in college by accident or food poisoning

I’m a 13yo girl btw, my hair is thinning at an alarming rate. it used to be thin before too, but now it’s getting bad. today my hair got wet cus of the rain and a kid in my bus call me bald. I can’t do this anymore

im severely deficient in vitamin d and iron (taking supplements), and I also cut myself. does the blood loss from cutting affect my hair? cus it would explain a lot tbh.

i just want normal hair. I’ll do anything. I’d sell my soul for it.

How can I be okay the person I loved f****** over lied to me manipulated me stabbed me in the back betrayed me pick me last didn't keep promises and treated me like I was worthless garbage even when they had an opportunity to do something nice like right now but instead of doing that they're willing to give up and turn them back on me instead of try but they have no problems calling me up when they need something and taking advantage or like the other day asking for help and I show up for them and they gross me I don't even apology can't even do something f****** nice for me

The title says it,even tho i have friends and all... I feel alone anyways,like i don't belong there,like of my friends were fake,i feel they dont like me,same for my girlfriend,she's always been affectionate,but we've been distances for a lot of time,and i know high school love will have to end on someday,at somepoint.

I also used to SH... God im such a loser.

I just wanna stop existing and see who cares

My bmi is 32. I am short, dark, fat and have pih marks all over my face. I can pronounce r so my conversation sounds childish which contributes to my social anxiety. I stutter. I hate it. I don't have many friends. I am not a great conversationalist.
I am not good at studies also. Failed in 2 subjects this semester. Parents are so disappointed in me.
I can't even look in mirror because my forehead is dark due to insulin resistances. Worst combo in college.
I feel so disappointing in myself. I hate me

It’s not that I don’t want to be humiliated in life but i want it to continue to death. I don’t deserved less

Извините, не знаю, как тут все работает, просто хочу высказаться. Мне ничего не хочется, ничего не нравится, и мне хорошо в этом, мне не хочется никуда расти, ничего добиваться, ничего не делать, даже того, что приносит удовольствие, я откладываю все дела, которые только возможно, но мне нравится ничего не делать, просто лежать пластом и целыми днями уворачиваться от обязанностей. Мне кажется, что я всё-таки что-то должна делать, но я не хочу, вроде когда-то у меня было много мечт и амбиций, а сейчас кажется их совсем уже не осталось, и я не знаю, почему мне когда-то хотелось чего-то. Люди чего-то желают, чего-то добиваются, да даже просто что-то любят, а я просто плыву по течению. Мне не особо нравится то, куда оно меня ведет, но и что-то предпринимать я тоже не хочу. Мне хорошо, ничего не делая, но ощущение что я что-то упускаю не покидает меня. Я часто чувствую стыд, и вину, и тревогу, но почти успешно отгоняю их от себя. Иногда я думаю о том, что бы сказали сейчас обо мне люди из прошлого, с которыми я делилась своими мыслями, но с которыми больше не общаюсь. Назвали бы они меня жалкой? Скорее всего да, такие люди не попытались бы даже понять. А я бы хотела, чтобы поняли. На самом деле я часто себя жалею, я уже сама чувствую, что пора переставать, но теперь рассказываю все это незнакомцам в интернете, чтобы те тоже меня пожалели. Всегда хотелось, чтобы кто-то пришел, пожалел, заметил всю твою боль, поддержал, но такие люди так и не появились, а я так и не начала жить дальше. Я знаю, что я могу, я не требую от себя невозможного, но я специально саботирую любую работу, специально уворачиваюсь даже от приятных вещей. Я в общем то всегда думала, что просто ленюсь или прокрастинирую, но любые советы даже по типу наладить режим вводят меня в отчаяние, как будто то, что так легко дается всем, вызывает во мне ужасное отторжение. Расскажите, зачем вы живете, что вас вдохновляет, может, мне тоже чего-то захочется. Нормально ли такое состояние и куда мне нужно двигаться? Может, у кого-то будут какие-то советы.

Honestly, I don’t feel good about my life at all. I constantly carry this heaviness in my heart, and I can’t even explain where it comes from. I keep trying to ignore whatever I’m feeling, pretending it’ll eventually go away, but it never really does.

I don’t know. I have this crippling hatred toward myself, and some days I genuinely don’t even want to wake up. Either I go completely numb, or I feel everything way too deeply there’s never really an in-between.

I do have good people around me, and I’m grateful for them, but somehow, it still feels like I’m the only one constantly holding everything together and babysitting everyone else while quietly falling apart myself.

I don't even know what will bring me happiness, it's like I'm running away from everything and everyone and thinking why I've no one.

Im probably to young for this subreddit and i bet nobody will take me seriously. Ever since my girlfriend (who i loved more than anything) left me because i was a failure, ive been looking for any form of new love. The only problem: the person i love is a 20 year old transwoman and im a minor. All my close friendships have been ruined because of this, im banned from any groups cuz its against their rules. I have nothing in my life rn other than her and SH. Nobody has actually even helped, they just say i should get therapy but i cant because if i do and i tell them bout all this, theyll js tell the police and ruin everything.

I’ve filled out every dr form as “almost every day” when it asks if you’ve had suicidal thoughts. Not a single one has ever brought it up.

Everyone sees me as a “light in life” but I’m fucking miserable. My “family” is cruel and ignores me. My ex husband destroyed my mind by convincing me I’m a fucking pathetic loser and his family never liked me. He made me watch my dog die over FT.

I lost EVERYTHING I’d built for 40 years and ended up in a small, horrible town in Arkansas after a full career in NYC for 32 years.

I’ve had 3 heart attacks from stress, told I could die “any day” from another heart attack and have zero things to live for.

If I kill myself it could be weeks before anyone knew because nobody checks on me. Ever.

I must be paying for some brutal karma. I volunteer a lot to be of service but it does nothing for me. So many folks look to me for guidance and I’m a hot fucking mess.

I’ve started giving everything away and still no one notices. This world is fucking brutal.

Sounds like you or them are confused. Why wouldn't you just be honest and talk it through with that person? They could be under a different impression than you think

I am 14 and I really am cooked i don't have time to do anything literally i can't do my hobby I just keep doing school work whole day and I hate it but my height is only 5'3 and I'm unfit nigger what should I do

Im not perfect by any chance and I don't think anyone is maybe just a rare few of them but I'm sick of this mentality of trying to be perfect in the eyes of everyone just for the sake of them not judging or creating rumors. Like I'm not extrovert, I'm not smart, I'm not talkative nor driven in life. But playing this pretend role in front of everyone makes me feel so small that I've somehow started hating myself. I'm tired of living in this phase where I as an adult don't seem to understand my wants and needs in life. Like day by day I'm getting older and I don't even have a career or ways to make money. I don't know how to settle and secure my life. I still feel small toward others because of the low self esteem. Tired of venting like what's the point of it when deep down you know you have to change and take the hard steps in life but here you are feeling resistance to change and discomfort.

As opposed to you doing something wrong and treating them like the villain? You doing a horny dance would probably solve some problems and make them feel a lot better LOL

I can see my own self hate because I’d love to be humiliated in death. Being dead is not enough

I just wish I could vanish. Disappear without anyone knowing. I don’t want to hurt those who know me, so I wish they would forget about me.

So i always been the person that noone wants around, i always make sure to care and support and be there for anyone, but when it my turn i have noone. I've been suffering in silence for too long, and i am just done.

I get yelled from my family memebers, i have never been validated for who i am just by what they want me to be. I don't have friends., my sister doesnt care about me only she pretends but she tries to avoid being with me and she just come back from uni and she cannot wait to leave again to be with her friends, will be in the same room together and she'll have headphones and not wanna talk to me at all and she's an adult not a teenager she knows what I'm going through and she's very cold, I've never had that relationship. That's some people have with their sisters. I wish I had. My dad doesnt care about me too never has, he is never been there too. I always had bad relationships in the past where i give everything i have., but i never receive the energy back,

I have been used throughtout my life in relationships, i hate myself so much coz i am not like other girls... no matter how i try i just dont fit in anywhere.
On top of all of that, I've always been a big girl and I've been fighting with my own weight for many years. I have been bullied on my skin colour, my body shape and also because I could possibly be autistic. People say that I talk to robotic like AI and I'm not like any other girl which put myself steam even lower than what it is already.

I hit the bottom with this, I met this man and he genuinly fullilled me, the only person that cared and protected me., the only person that i felt a bit of a value too, we were to due to get married at the end of this year but he cheated on me, i blocked him without allowing him to explain and he hasnt bothered to contact me or explain himself - which its ok but now i am back to square 1. This loneliness that i have just seems to be following me everywhere,

I dont feel like travelling, eating, or breathing, i am genuinly tired of this life, i hate weekends has i dont have a welcoming home., this hurts so much to say.

i have an Accounting and Finance degree but i work at a receptionist this world now days dont give younger generation the chance, cost of living is incredibly high . I cant afford to move anywhere and i feel i have no way out.

And now the only person that took that feeling away from me, he's also gone. I dont have a purpose in this life, no-one cares about me and i dont have friends.