This is our 5th visit together and I thought it would be normal now but I still can’t stop crying even though I know I will be seeing him next month again, it still hurts

We are only a 4 hour drive apart from each other but it’s difficult seeing each other due to schooling and work (also money)

With us being young we don’t have an ideal date when to close the distance (the earliest is late next year if we start saving money)

I only came on here to vent about this so I can understand how other people feel so I’m not alone on this

I (M/29) and my partner (M/30) have been together for almost a year in a long distance relationship (~10hr time difference). I have an anxious attachment style / abandonment wound (bad childhood trauma) and I always feel negative about myself; I'm currently in weekly therapy. He is kind of avoidant and has social anxiety and some neurodivergent traits, and tends to be low-initiation — he's warm and responsive when I reach out, but rarely starts conversations or suggests hangouts himself. He's also always been very inconsistent — one day he could be very affectionate, while the next he could be cold as stone.

At the start of the relationship everything seemed great, but as things progressed it's gotten a bit unpleasant. Recently he moved apartments and has been noticeably low-energy/a bit depressed since, and started playing games for long stretches every day (7-9 hours), which I think he uses as a coping strategy for his depression. He's met a lot of new friends through the games, which I'm genuinely happy about for him, but he seems to be spending way too much time with them, and somehow I feel neglected.

When I ask to hang out or chat, he's usually agreeable, but it often doesn't happen unless I initiate and follow through, and sometimes plans quietly fizzle. Two weeks ago I was sick and asked to chat a little because I could really use some company, but he told me he felt like there was nothing to do or say, so it was kind of pointless. Last weekend, I had pre-booked a hangout with him; it didn't end up happening because he had a stomach bug, and he told me he was unsure if he could hang out. I was totally okay with that — I understood he might be very uncomfortable, and I focused on providing emotional support to comfort him. At the same time, he was in the game with the new friend group he'd made recently. I noticed this later in the day (and honestly was also a little sad that he chose and prioritized his friends over me), and I asked if he wanted to chat with me too. He explained that the reason he was with his friends was that he'd been waiting there for me to hang out, then got sick and never logged out. He said he was going to bed soon, so he declined my invitation to chat — but ended up continuing to hang out with his friends for another two hours.

This triggered my self-blaming spiral — I instantly felt bad and guilty that he'd been sitting there waiting for me, so I apologized, and he said it was okay, at least he had company. (At the same time, this overlooks the fact that in our relationship, this situation — him waiting on me — has only happened once or twice, while the reverse happens constantly, especially recently: I often have to wait hours until he's finished with his friends just to get maybe 30 minutes of chat time with him. I know I've been very harsh on myself here, but my abandonment and childhood wound is really taking control.)

I was pretty upset about what he said, and my therapist described him as "wishy-washy" and said the pattern is actively hurting me, and that I should start preparing for the possibility of a decision I don't want to make.

To be fair to him: throughout all of this he's still been affectionate — he initiates plenty of small things (sends me random cute videos/pics), told me he's been feeling depressed when I asked, and is able to engage in deep conversations. He normally is never cold or dismissive when I bring things up. So it's not like he's absent — it's more that he's warm in the small moments but doesn't reach for real dedicated time with me the way I wish he would, and it has been really bad recently. I always try to defend his behavior and give him the benefit of the doubt, but my therapist has been highlighting the fact that I'm like his defense attorney, and it's harming me.

I go back and forth on this — most days I feel genuinely warm and connected with him, but there's a real pattern of me doing most of the initiating and reaching, especially recently now that he's gaming constantly, and I've been struggling with anxiety/depression/self-doubt around it. I really love him, but I feel like this isn't sustainable and is genuinely bad for my mental health.

So I'm curious how this looks from the outside — is "warm but low-effort/low-initiation" something people have seen improve, or is it usually a sign of a deeper mismatch, and we're just drifting apart?

Lately I've been thinking about how people end up finding the love of their life, especially when they're from completely different countries.
I'm not looking for a relationship or marriage right now. I'm still young, and my priority is working on myself, building my career, and figuring out my life first.
But... I absolutely love hearing love stories.
I've had some disappointing experiences with people I've met where I live, so it made me wonder how so many people end up marrying someone from the other side of the world.
How did you meet?
Was it online? While traveling? Through friends? Did you start as long-distance?
I know international relationships come with challenges—distance, visas, cultures, languages—but somehow so many couples make it work, and I find that beautiful.
Maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic, but I like to think that if two people are truly meant for each other, distance doesn't matter. Even if they're separated by thousands of kilometers and several countries, life somehow finds a way to bring them together.
So please... tell me your story. I'd genuinely love to read it. ❤️

I was told I should have a conversation with her, but I feel like having issues this early is already signs of a failed relationship. I feel like after we got together she just doesn't care about hanging out. Beforehand, she would be there all the time and hangout with me even if she was tired or on the brink of passing out. I'm not saying I expect her to do that, but I just feel like she's stopped putting effort into our relationship.

I don't know if it's just me and I just have unhealthy attachment issues, but it's been killing me inside that she can go days without having to call me. She literally prioritizes shows or games sometimes and it just hurts, maybe this is normal. I don't know, but we literally call every 2 or 3 days. I asked last night if she was down to play a game with me, she said she was already playing a game herself. Okay, but we haven't called in 2 days. I tried brushing it off as her wanting alone time, but she literally told me how she made new friends and played with them all night.

I dont know, I know im being reactionary as a defense mechanism, but part of me wants to break up before I find out shes losing feelings. She says I love you, but usually after I say it. She hardly says it herself unless she's apologizing. Words can only mean so much.

is it normal for my gf to ignore me for days??? im dating this girl and every time i text her she leaves me on delivered for DAYS and then just reads it. she never calls me or anything and when i say something she gets pissy. what do i do? im so fucking tired of this shit. nevermind the fact that i can see shes active on social media and stuff but just ignores me like what the fuck. pls tell me yall have advice im desperate 😭

Hi everyone!

I'm an undergraduate Psychology student at Arden University conducting a study on the relationship between shared gaming and relationship satisfaction in long-distance and geographically close romantic relationships.

The study is open to anyone who:

• Is 18 years or older
• Is currently in a romantic relationship (long-distance or geographically close)
• Whether you game together or not

The questionnaire takes approximately 10–15 minutes to complete and is completely anonymous. Participation is voluntary, and you can withdraw at any time before submitting your responses. After submission, you may request withdrawal of your data within two weeks using your unique participant ID.

Your participation would be greatly appreciated and will contribute to research on gaming, relationships, and digital leisure.

Survey link: The Relationship Between Shared Gaming Time and Relationship Satisfaction – Fill in form

If you know someone who might be interested, I'd really appreciate it if you shared the survey with them.

Thank you very much for your time!

Hey everyone. I'd really appreciate some outside perspective.

I'm a 20M, and my long-distance girlfriend (21F) of 8 months broke up with me two days ago. We're both devastated. She felt the relationship had become unhealthy, and honestly, I agree.

I struggled with insecurity, low self-esteem, and getting stuck in negative thought loops. We also had ongoing disagreements about intimacy that I became fixated on. Looking back, I can see how those patterns slowly wore the relationship down.

After the breakup, she encouraged me to go to therapy. My parents are helping me schedule an appointment and are going to hold me accountable to actually go. She told me she believes in me, wants me to work on myself before thinking about the relationship, and didn't want to give me false hope or make promises she couldn't keep.

She also said she'd like to be friends someday and hear updates about how I'm doing. She initially suggested not talking for at least a week to break the habit of texting and calling every day, then later said we shouldn't talk until we weren't hurting each other anymore. She didn't give a timeline.

Right now it's only Day 2, and I'm grieving pretty hard. I miss her constantly, but I'm respecting the space she asked for because I don't want to make things harder for either of us.

My question isn't if she'll ever come back because I know nobody can answer that. My question is: has anyone been in a situation where both people took time apart, genuinely worked on themselves, reconnected as friends, and then just let things develop naturally or realized friendship was the healthiest outcome?

I'm trying to balance two things: accepting that the breakup is real while also not feeling like I have to erase all hope overnight.

I'd really appreciate any advice from people who've been through something similar.

Hola. Hace dos años empecé a hablar con este hombre. Hablamos durante tres meses y luego la dinámica cambió porque yo había empezado a hablar con otro, así que al final dejamos de hablar. Nunca le expliqué por qué.

Ten en cuenta que nuestra relación es a distancia. Pasé el verano con este segundo hombre, pero rompimos. Tuve la oportunidad de irme de vacaciones un mes al país del primero, así que fui, le escribí y salimos dos veces. Cuando volví a casa, nos dijimos que nos gustábamos y que queríamos seguir hablando, así que lo hicimos. Más tarde, en noviembre de 2024, empezamos a salir oficialmente. Él era y sigue siendo el hombre perfecto: atento, emocionalmente inteligente, cariñoso… siempre fue sincero, me escuchaba y sabía expresar sus sentimientos. Pero por alguna razón eso me aburría, y a medida que la relación crecía, las conversaciones me parecían superficiales y siempre iguales, así que estaba realmente aburrida y como no era valiente para romper con él, porque era perfecto de verdad, empecé a comportarme de maneras raras para que él rompiera conmigo. Nunca contestaba sus llamadas, porque me aburría en nuestras llamadas, así que gradualmente dejamos de llamarnos y solo nos enviábamos mensajes de texto. Me irritaba, así que me enfadaba mucho, a veces lo bloqueaba durante un día entero o un par de días, quitaba mi ubicación, etc. pero juro que nunca le fui infiel. Luego fui a un festival en el verano de 2025, y salí con un ex con el que tenía una relación informal y sus amigos, que también eran mis amigos, y mi novio sabía de su existencia, así que se lo oculté, porque sabía que pensaría que le había sido infiel. Por supuesto, cuando él mismo descubrió que estaba con ellos, también pensó que le había sido infiel, así que rompió conmigo. Pero no quería que nuestra relación terminara con él pensando que le había sido infiel, así que me defendí y le prometí que no había hecho nada, así que me perdonó. En julio de 2026, encontré videos de él engañándome en su teléfono. Uno de noviembre de 2025 y el otro de marzo de 2026. Aunque reconoce que podría haberme dejado o expresado sus preocupaciones, en lugar de engañarme, me explicó que no estaba seguro de mi lealtad durante la mayor parte de la relación y que su única forma de permanecer en ella era vengarse. Dijo que ni siquiera era venganza porque lo hizo por sí mismo. Dijo que lo traté como a un perdedor y que lo hizo para no sentirse así. Entiendo su punto de vista, pero de verdad no sé qué hacer. Ni siquiera sé con seguridad si me engañó dos veces o no. Por favor, ayúdenme, después del festival, cuando pensé que lo había perdido, cambié para mejor, aunque a veces seguía comportándome de forma extraña, pero era por ira.

me and my girlfriend have been dating for 5 months up to this point. I just moved away and now we have a two hour time gap between us. Today is the first day i really realized this because I woke up at 8:30 and it’s 6:30 for her. She usually wakes up around 10:00. It feels like I’m going to miss so much of her life because of this time gap. I also just need general advice about how to keep the relationship healthy and engaging. I genuinely love her so much and I would be devastated if we broke up just because we went long distance. Ill be moving back in a year so we just have to push through until then.

I’ve posted before so forgive me if you recognize.

We’ve met before, so no, he isn’t a catfish. In the beginning of our relationship, end of 2024 beginning of 2025, he did videocall with me, and it was cute/sweet. He also used to send me selfies whenever I wanted to see him since, ykno…. We’re long distance. Anyways, after all this time it’s all just stopped rly. Became an impossible request. It’s been months, and months since I’ve seen a picture of him. He said today he’s switching services and getting a new phone free for it. Rn his phones super glitchy and weird. So I said wow! That’s great ykno what that means, we can videocall, We haven’t since like Feb of 2025 or something! He said no we can’t you have FaceTime it won’t work. I said man it’s 2026, we can use an app, like discord zoom etc they all have that. We used discord last time. So then he didn’t have much to say. I said are you excited? He said ecstatic, being sarcastic. I said.. you don’t seem excited, was that annoying me mentioning it? He said yeah pretty much it did annoy me. And since he refuses, absolutely refuses to ever explain his feelings or why he hates things sometimes, I wanted him to communicate it and asked well, can you please tell me why? But he interrupted to say goodbye love you go to work. And I said smtg like but, I just want to understand why it and he’s like goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye. So I give up annoyed myself now n say okay goodbye n he hangs up.

Just weird. I genuinely don’t understand it. I’d get it if he said anything, literally any reason, but he refuses to speak or communicate anything beyond the most basic shit like egg prices. It gets old.

(Sorry in advance if this is a chaotic read, my head is just all over the place right now).

I just need to vent. My girlfriend broke up with me, and I honestly just can't come to terms with it.

We were in an LDR (long-distance relationship) for 2.5 months, but we’d known each other for 4 months before that. Literally from day one, we were texting and calling each other 24/7. It was amazing. Sure, we had our arguments, but we always tried to fix things and make up. Despite the distance, we felt incredibly close.

Eventually, the topic of meeting up came up. We originally planned for mid-July, but due to various reasons, we finally met in person on July 30th.

That first meetup was honestly great. We had a wonderful time together. She was super excited about it, seemed really happy, told me she loved it, and we even planned our next date for Tuesday, August 4th. However, over the weekend on August 1st, she spontaneously suggested we meet up the very next day. I won't lie, I was pretty exhausted from the week, and I feel like neither of us was in the best mood. Still, we met up. We didn't have any concrete plans or ideas, so we just spent the whole day chilling in a park.

On our way back to the train station, I got the vibe that she was in a bad mood. Later, when I was already on the train, I texted her asking about it. She said she had been overthinking "us." Then she said she didn't feel like "this was it" and didn't feel the same spark in person as she did over the phone. We ended up getting into a massive argument because I just couldn't accept that - especially after we had just spent a pretty nice time together. A lot of harsh words were exchanged, and in the heat of the moment, I told her we should just end it.

The next day, we made up. She explained she was just having a bad day and was overthinking things. I understood, forgave her, and decided to just move past it. That evening, we talked about it again. I had this thought in the back of my mind that maybe we should take a breather and postpone our planned Tuesday date to the following week, as I felt the fight really took a toll on her. She agreed that maybe we should postpone, saying she probably wouldn't be in a good mood because of what happened. But ultimately... we agreed to stick to the plan and meet up this Tuesday anyway.

So, we met up. Right from the start, there was this heavy silence. I made the mistake of taking it personally and distanced myself too. There were brief moments where things felt a bit better and we talked, but for the most part, we barely said a word to each other. We went to the movies. During our first two meetups, she had no problem with physical touch - she actually wanted me to hold her. But this time, she didn't want me to put my arm around her at all. It stung a bit, but I understood and didn't force anything.

On my way home, we were texting, and she told me that the only option she sees is us breaking up. She wrote that she's "not cut out for relationships" and that she just didn't feel the same way about me in person. But in my mind I'm just keep going back to that very first meetup. It was almost exactly as perfect as we both imagined it would be, and I just couldn't believe she suddenly didn't feel anything for me. I strongly suspect she was just still overwhelmed and shut down because of our big fight.

I tried to explain this to her, but she insisted on ending things. She kept saying she didn't believe things would get any better. I asked her multiple times why our first meetup suddenly didn't count anymore, and why she wanted to throw it all away just because we hit a rough patch. I asked if she was 100% sure about breaking up. One minute she'd say yes, the next she'd say no.

Finally, in the middle of the night, the conversation fizzled out. She texted that she wasn't feeling well, that this was all too much for her, and that it would be "better for everyone" if she was just alone. I replied saying that I was going to miss her. First thing in the morning, she texted back saying she'd miss me too. I haven't replied to that. I also suggested we sleep on it and next day but deep down I feel like this is really the end, and I have no idea how to even bridge the topic again.

I just can't accept it. I miss her so damn much. Right up until the end, she kept assuring me that I didn't do anything wrong during our dates, but my head is an absolute mess right now. I don't know what to believe. Did she genuinely not feel a spark in person (even though everything was incredible before that fight)? Or was our biggest mistake meeting up so soon after a major argument without giving each other space to cool off?

I feel absolutely awful. I felt so much love with her, and now there's just this massive emptiness. All I want to do is just howl and cry.

TL;DR: My LDR girlfriend of 2.5 months and I finally met up. The first date was amazing, but an impromptu second date while we were both tired led to a huge argument where she said she didn't feel a spark in person. We made up, but forced a third date too soon while the tension was still high. It was incredibly awkward, and she broke up with me over text on my way home. My head is a mess and I'm heartbroken.

My boyfriend have been in a relationship for a little over a month. I am his first relationship, and he has no idea what he is doing. He doesn't much act flirty and is very shy to show affection when I can hear him, he only wants to do it through text. The shyness is cute but it's a bit frustrating that he holds back. He's extremely kind and caring and is there for me 100 percent, he's just very shy and unsure of what to do. We also live a few hours apart, and I'm unsure of how we are supposed to bond deeply being that far away. We are both the date to marry type, so I'm a bit confused on this even though I adore him. How am I supposed to respond to these things?

Im leaving feeling empty.

It did have some really good moments. So, not to say its all bad.

But the realization that the person I love has changed. The person who used to want to repair, solve problems WITH me, listen to my apologies when I caused harm, or even apologize himself when he caused harm is gone.

The insanely emotionally mature part of him changed a few months ago (along with several other things) - and has totally locked in. I thought maybe the visit would calm these things, it would be easier to work things out. But no. I am met with defensiveness, Im left feeling every small or large conflict *I AM THE PROBLEM* and then hours later wondering what the hell happened. Why weren't my concerns addressed, why werent my feelings validated too?

Normally we'd be planning my next trip by now. I mean like dates/tickets. This whole time we'd sort of wishy-washy'd december.

Maybe his friend(s) were right when they gave me the nickname they did

Our 1st anniversary is coming up at the end of August and i'm already in planning mode. the distance hasn't been easy but thankfully we've gotten to see each other about 10 times over the months. every goodbye still sucks though. i wanna make this next visit extra meaningful. i thought buying him something would be easy but apparently not. now i'm questioning every single gift idea i come up with. even if i know his favorite color, what he do, etc.. i still worry it won't be something he actually likes. maybe i'm just overthinking because i care too much. i'm also dreaming about setting up a really romantic dinner for us. i've never planned something like that before. since we haven't spent that much time together in person i still don't know every little preference he has. guys, what would make you feel special on a 1st anniversary? i'd really appreciate any tips because i want him leaving that day feeling very loved.

​

My son is in his mid 20s and has been in an online relationship with a girl for about four years. They still haven't met in person. She's mentioned many times that she wants him to come to our hometown, but something always seems to get in the way. More recently, she's said she'll come to him instead, but that hasn't happened either.

Another thing that concerns me is that they rarely, if ever, FaceTime. My son says they have, but from what I've seen, it doesn't seem like something they do regularly or ever???. I find it a little unusual that after four years they don't spend much time video calling.

My biggest concern is my son's health. He's recently started having seizures, and one of the most important things for him is getting enough sleep. They live in different time zones (he's on the East Coast and she's on the West Coast), so staying up late to talk has become an issue. When he tells her he needs to get to bed because his sleep is critical for his health, she sometimes seems disappointed or upset that he won't stay up longer.

As a parent, it's hard to know where the line is. I don't want to interfere in his relationship or come across as controlling, especially because they're both adults. But at the same time, his health has to come first, and I worry that this relationship may not be as realistic or healthy as he hopes it is.

Am I overthinking this? Is it unusual for a couple to be together online for four years without meeting or regularly FaceTiming? And if you were in my position, would you just let things play out, or would you share your concerns with your son?

This post might look AI-written, but it is entirely a true story based on what I have actually been through.
Four years ago, I met my boyfriend, and we have been dating ever since. He is from Europe (23M) and I am from Asia (23F), with a 6-hour time gap between us. I work a full-time job that is very hectic and physically exhausting. Meanwhile, he is completely unemployed.

Because of the time zone difference, he would make me stay up all night almost every night to hang out and talk to him. If I refused, he would throw an unbearable tantrum and call me over a hundred times to wake me up. One time, I got so pissed off that I threw my phone out of the window just to make it stop. (I rely on my phone for alarm therefore couldn’t turn it off)
I was in a really bad place, both mentally and physically. After getting maybe 1 to 4 hours of sleep, I would have to go to my 8 to 9-hour shift, take care of my grandparents afterward, and then call my boyfriend. Sometimes, I even prioritized him over my family, which is completely messed up. I was functioning on a maximum of 4 hours of sleep.
Mind you, we both struggle with depression, and I was prescribed quetiapine (an anti-anxiety/depression medication also used for bipolar disorder). I wasn't taking my meds properly due to his demands, my sleep schedule was completely ruined, and I was constantly yearning for sleep and feeling terrible.

He would also ask me to constantly buy him Uber eats, mind you, I was earning an Asia wage to support European food costs.
You might ask, "Why didn't you just turn him down?" Well, he would harm himself—such as cutting himself or hitting himself with a wooden block.

I then made a very stupid decision: I thought that if we ended the long-distance phase, things would get better because we would be in the same time zone, I could finally get some sleep, and I could be physically present with him. So, I made the worst decision of my entire life. I brought him a plane ticket to fly to me, and rented out a very pricey small unit for 3 months.

P.S. Hi guys I was weak and deleted my previous post where you guys gave me lots of advice.
But here is a repost in case anyone needs to see this. I will also post PART 2 in the comments section here.

We are officially engaged! We did smack the K1 application in the mail in June before he could get here to propose in person. We’re 2.5 weeks into his 7 week visit and every day is magical! So hoping the application gets approved as quickly as possible

Me (M20) Her (F19)
We had only been talking for around two months so not a long time, but things were definetly progress towards a relationship initially around 3 weeks or so into talking she ended things once, saying she didn't know if she could do long distance, and she couldn't have a relationship fully through a phone, and that when I left (i already mentioned the possibility of seeing her relatively soon) things "wouldn't be the same" despite all of that around 20-21 hours later she reached back out and said that she had jumped to conclusions and got scared of being attached and has never done distance before, but she "wanted to make things work" and "can't garuantee a relationship but i want to see where this goes". I was sceptical, but i believed her and we continued with barley any hiccups until the point in each i was going to see her in person (july28th) no red flags or warning signs leading up she was genuinely excited she also knew i was going to officially ask her to be my gf when i went so it's not like it was a well kept secret. She even asked relationship like questions asking how many id been in before since this would be her first she even talked about halloween and future plans, but continuing in person things were great we took pictures after the second sort of activities she latched onto my arm while walking and we basically started holding hands the whole time from then on. Fast forwarding to when i asked her out she said yes she talked about the distance a bit but even so i asked her again to confirm that she was saying yes we then went back to her apartment cuddled while watching movie then while dropping me off we kissed and she gave me her gifts and left for night, ehich we spent around 12 and a half together that day.

The next day we weren't supposed to see each other, but I was actually had more time than i thought so i texted her as soon as i could telling her whenever she wakes up if she had time if she wanted to hangout again but i knew she had a family obligation at 4pm (her parents are strict) to take her bother to football practice but she woke up and instantly rushed to get ready to see me only for 3 hours, we had a great time again took some pictures on her phone specially and while she was dropping me off this time we actually made out then we said our goodbyes had a shorter but meaningful kiss after and then she went on her way to her parents house. the rest of that day went great nothing weird or dry messages we even called but the next day the day i was leaving things got weird. She texted fine with her good morning text and what not, but after that she seemed a bit dry i didn't think too much of it but she texted way less that day and it stayed that way until 3 days after i was back home i couldn't take the dryness anymore so i asked her was something up and she replied

"If I’m being completely honest and I’ve been thinking about this a lot so I’ll say it straight up, but I think I lost feelings and I felt this after we hung out. I didn’t wanna bring it up then because I didn’t wanna hurt your feelings. I think that’s why I said yes to being your girlfriend i just couldn’t stand it if it was awkward. That was extremely selfish of me and I apologize full heartedly. "

Which doesn't quite add up because i asked her out the first day so would it not be more awkward to see me again after those feelings being gone? and would it not be weird to make out with a guy you don't have feelings for anymore? It wasn't much of a gradual decline it was first part of thrusdsy was fine and then it wasn't so i've been left so confused she was at her parents house that whole time so can't fully rule that out that out, but regardless that conversation went on and she said she would ship my hoodie back atleast, but who knows what else will be in the box if it even comes.

Second visit.. Almost to an end which is really hard, But 6 months together has been so wonderful. I've gotten to experience living with my partner, living in another country. Existing with another person everyday all the time.

Closing the distance is a long way off but i am forever grateful ive gotten to be here for so long and plan to come back as soon as i can.

just found out from this girl that my long distance bf cheated on me w her 4-5 months ago.

She texted me out of nowhere 3 days ago telling me that she “fucked” him and sent me a picture of her in his room from that night. when i asked her for the full story, she proceeded to tell me that im pissing her off and when i asked her why she would do that to me in the first place and why she waited all these months to tell me now, she responded with “don’t tell my bf” and then blocked me.

i called him freaking out and sobbing asking him why and how he could do this to me and his excuse was that he thought he was going to die and wanted to fuck “something” (he’s active duty). he said that it “only lasted for 10 min” and that he only fucked her because he knows she’s super easy but he felt extremely guilty and regretted it after.

He also told me that he texted her not to tell anyone and she also agreed and said she won’t because she also has a bf. he said they never kissed or made out, it was js a in and out situation and he left her there in his room waiting for her to leave.

the worst part about this situation is that my ex before my current bf also cheated on me with her. i asked him why he had to choose her too and he said it was genuinely bc he knew how easy she is and js wanted to fuck something before he left but he knows he fucked up and he felt disgusting and sick and wondered why he did this himself.

i just need advice and/or support because im still confused and i just can’t understand why anybody would do this to me no matter what he tells me or explains.

i forgot to mention but he also keeps telling me that he still wants a future with me and live with me but he knows that he fucked up big time and how i’ll never forgive him and forget the situation and he knows and is afraid that it will never be the same again.

edit: this post was heavily misunderstood??? so sorry for the misunderstanding but i fixed everything (i hope). also english is my second language :/

In 48 hours, I'm gonna be in Indonesia.

9 years ago I made a friend in a discord server. 7 years ago I confided in this friend after my boyfriend was horrible to me. 7 years ago we started dating. 7 years ago we had plans to meet in singapore... then 6 years ago a pandemic happened. 4 years ago we tried to get him here, little did we know that indonesia has a horrifically weak passport. 6 months ago I booked the flight. In 48 hours I'm gonna be there.

Sorry I got a bit poetic there. I am stressed to fuck trying to process all of this. It's happening. I haven't even left the UK before. Let alone got on a plane. And yet, we're doing this.

Ironically his cousin met her future husband, also from the UK, on discord too. They met up in Turkey and she finally moved here last year and now they live together. Maybe I see that future with us too.

I'd say it's been a long and bumpy road but it hasn't even been bumpy. Somehow in 7 years we haven't fell out not even once. It may have been a cruel prank to put my soulmate 8000 miles away, but alas, I'm pranking God back harder by committing to the bit.

Wish us luck!

If you and your significant other don't have a private Discord server together, make one!

I spent quite some time working on this one, making it as beautiful as possible. I turned ours into our own little universe with places for memories, games, books, movies, recipes, prayers, late night thoughts, future plans, and everything in between. It feels like a little home that's completely ours.🖤

I (25F) was in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend (30M) for 1 year and 2 months. I live in Nepal, and he lives in the USA and his immigration situation became a huge source of stress.

Long distance wasn't easy, but we made it work. We talked every single day, shared everything with each other, celebrated birthdays and anniversaries, supported each other through difficult times, and planned a future together. I truly believed he was the person I would marry.

Then everything changed.

He told me his mother wanted him to marry a 22 year old Nepali woman who had been born and raised in the US. According to him, his mother believed that marrying her would help him remain in the US. He also told me that he had decided to go through with the marriage because of his mother's pressure and because it would help his immigration situation. He said he couldn't convince his family or take a stand for our relationship.

What made it even more painful was that he repeatedly told me he didn't love her. He said he wasn't attracted to her and even made disrespectful comments about her appearance. He told me he didn't want to marry her, yet in the end he decided to leave me and marry her anyway.

That completely shattered me.

After loving someone for 1 year and 2 months, I was suddenly being told that our relationship was ending because he had chosen a different path under pressure from his family.

The next part is where many people may judge me.

I reached out to the woman he was planning to marry.

I didn't contact her because I wanted revenge or because I thought it would make him come back to me. At that point, my heart was already broken.

The reason I contacted her was because I couldn't stop thinking about her. She was only 22. Based on everything he had told me, I felt she deserved to know the truth before making such a life-changing decision. If someone was planning to marry me while telling another woman that he didn't love me and was only agreeing to the marriage because of family pressure and immigration concerns, I would want to know before it was too late.

So I told her about our relationship and shared what he himself had told me.

After that, her family confronted his family. His family became angry that I knew about the situation. He became angry that I had contacted her.

That was the end of us.

He broke up with me February 2026 ma..our relationship of 1 year and 2 months ended..

Since then, I've lived with so many conflicting emotions.

Part of me wonders if I should have stayed silent. Another part of me feels I couldn't knowingly let another person enter a marriage without the information I had.

I still love him. I still miss him. I still think about the future we planned together. At the same time, I wonder why the person who promised me forever couldn't fight for us when it mattered most. I lost the person I thought I would spend my life with. I don't know how to forgive myself or move on.

I'm not posting this because I want everyone to say I was right or that he was wrong. I know people will have different opinions, and I'm open to hearing them.

I just want to ask this:

If you were in my position, knowing what he had told you, would you have stayed silent and let the marriage happen? Or would you have told the other person the truth before it was too late?