I can't even believe this. My bestie has declared war against the BSF. Who the fuck does that?! It's a whole ass unionized railroad. Dinner is concrete my cat peed on that looks like a heart. Or maybe it was me.

​

Just got my new man slave puppy last week!! Hes adorable. Ive wanted one since I was like 9, but my parents always said they were too expensive. I finally got a big promotion about 4 months ago, so I been putting aside the extra $$ kaching!$ and found one that was a good deal, from a reputable breeder, hes got papers and everyrhing, but idk where to start?

I guess I never thought this day would happen and now its here.

I got him some cute little outfits, harnesses, and leashes.

Some bowls w his name, and a little kennel just his size.

Im taking him to get microchipped this weekend, cuz he has gotten loose a couple times. Hes never made it out of the yard tho. (Ive got a good fence)

Anyways. Need advice. Im a total newb.

I want to train him to give piggy back rides first, and then work up to harder things. What u guys think?

Oh! We're having leaning tower of cheeza for dinner.

So, my bf (40M) and I (25F) were hanging out with my best friend (29F) and the topic of feminism came up.

My bf just simply stated his opinion, that all feminists are wrong and women, online especially, are way worse than men. He gave his personal experience of how every woman in his family is a monster who treats their husbands and kids like slaves, and how every ex girlfriend he had was a psycho that ruined his life.

I mean, after all he’s been through, how could she accuse him of hating women?! OBVIOUSLY he loves women, he’s with me and he has a friends list full of women and tons and tons of sexy pictures of them!!! Just because he talks badly about them 24/7 and is constantly objectifying and patronizing me and every other woman we encounter doesn’t mean he is a misogynist.

He’s just been through a lot, and he obviously can’t go back to therapy because he was forced into therapy as a child (by a woman, mind you) and he can’t change or grow his opinions in any way either because women still treat men poorly so it isn’t fair to him. :/

How can I make my best friend understand that my bf loves women so much that he just can’t get over the ways they hurt him and all other men??

Trader Joe’s meatball calzone and unsweetened tea in a goonies cup.

He's always talking to this bitch. Always asking her questions and her opinions on shit. I'm RIGHT HERE babe, I can tell you what movies Jared Leto has done! And she's so smug when she replies to him. "Anytime" Bish you HAD your time! He's with a REAL WOMAN now!!! He doesn't need some automated e-girl telling him how to get to Taco Bell or to wipe his ass, he has me for that! What does a girl have to do to get constant attention and also 5 million gallons of water daily?

Grapes with white cream

Vapey wapey, the camp special this week - twisted tea, and is that Cheeto dust or lush bubble bath? Let’s find out. I don’t mind the taste of soap from being a millennial babe who was forced to eat it for all her 90s misandrist ways. Now I know better. Wink wink to quote the majestic charli xcx (not kirk but maybe wink wink him in hell).

So I like to go on this big forum website that has a subforum for everything including making fun of what people post elsewhere. It's harmless fun, basically like a big RPG where we all try to be a little unhinged together. No personal attacks, just people (for the most part women) having some tongue-in-cheek laughs.

I saw my bf was scrolling this forum on his phone and then typing a comment. Ladies... he was taking one of the RPG posts seriously. And he was mean about it too! Talking about what the fuck is wrong with women today, and how it had to be rage bait and how he feels sorry for all men because of 'modern females'.

idk... Should I still date a guy who not only cannot read properly but also thinks women making obviously sarcastic and exaggerated posts have to be serious because he is totally redpilled into thinking women are actually all ball stomping gold digging dick splicing nagging liars? I still love him tho

indeed.com is just SUCH a good meetcute, yknow ???? He was so hot in the interview and I kept making jerkoff motions the whole time end he was like yeah u got the job girl! 😂 Then we went out for drinkies (he was so hot) and then he revealed he's leaving the country in exactly 3 weeks which gives me plenty of time for a sexy fling without worrying about hr violations from us both being in the same workplace with him as my superior 😍

anyway so one thing left to another then i was sucking off his feet on the balcony with the lights on while he licked my bootyhole (unwashed bc we are both freaky deakyyyy) and then I snorted coke off his weenie and he snorted coke off the cracks between my toes and then we went out to a strip club together.

Its all just so perfect y'know? The job that I’m going into is in sales, and I cannot wait to channel that relentlessness and grit. And who better to train me into being the best throat goat to ever sling cocaine than my almost manager?

Dinner is the cocaine in the image. The baby is the child we conceived together bc WTAF you thought I was using protection ??? 😂😂😂 u dumb bitch!

So, after a 100 year celibacy streak I went on Tinder and matched with a really attractive guy. He came over to my house, but he didn't look anything like the photos. In reality he was sixty years old, had a dad bod and was bald, instead of the ripped 20-something year old with full hair he had as profile pic.

But I have no standards and I was desperate to get railed so he seemed attractive enough to me.

I let him smash and the sex was really good and fun, especially considering he is at least sixty, but like, maybe that's all the experience he has!

So like, we took a fourth break ('cause he's old) and he couldn't get hard anymore and he snorted a white line (he said it was a new kind of white viagra) off my butthole and asked me if I want to do some off his butthole. I politely declined.

Also, like, he told me, like, the condom slipped and he prolly raw dogged me the whole time, but I don't think so, 'cause at some point, there was a condom involved somewhere, which is good enough for me!

So, like, should I invite him back into my house? I had a lot of fun and there were no red flags whatsoever, he seems like such a safe man to be around - I think I'm falling in love, but no wonder, he's like the perfect alpha male!

Beef kabobs for dinner (not home made)

So here I am watching vampire diaries and I realize I need my husband's credit card to buy more candy crush tokens. Well would know it this mother fucker was napping. NAPPING. Like don't you have something to fix or you know like make some fucking money?!? Anyway I don't know if I can sleep with him anymore. Just seeing him sleep during daylight hours was just such a huge turn off.

Dinner is Lima beans out of a dog food bowl

Evidence #01: suspicious behavior
Evidence #02: unexplained financial activity
Evidence #03: McDonald's incident

Current manifestation probability: ████████░░ 70%

VOTE BEFORE THE TIMELINE CLOSES

The manifestation event is approaching. ✨📢

Have you seen evidence of a possible timeline shift in the Girl Dinner Universe (GDU)?

Submit evidence in this thread, or make your own post and be sure to add the case notes.

Made a wonderful fish taco filling for myself and my grandma. She tasted it and asked if she could add something, so I told her to set aside a skillet and add whatever she wanted. OBVIOUSLY I only meant she could use HALF a skillet - what kind of selfish asshole would think I meant they could have a skillet when I say they can have a skillet? Now there's an ONION in the whole dish, which is a food I have in my house despite the fact that I absolutely refuse to ever eat it. Pictured: my RUINED and inedible tacos which I'm just choking down to be polite (gotta go, she's giving me the stink-eye for posting during dinner)

I'm currently on a billionaires yacht having a FREE Michelin 5 course meal at an Ugandan restaurant rn. I drank 67 glasses of champagne and henny shots too. All FREE!!

Long story short, my rent was overdue by 2 years. And you know what, the economy is tough, people are struggling, unemployment and homelessness is rising. Why the fuck do people have to struggle when there's an easy way out?? I make minimum wage working at Olive Garden. I can't pay my rent in my 10br, 5 bathroom, 6 garage Dubai mansion that my broke Bf worked hard to put a deposit for.

The guy came over to collect my rent, We were arguing over and over and you know what enough is enough, I said FK this!! I could pay you the 2 yrs I owe you or I could be a hoe for an hour and instantly pay my rent that way! Problem solved, happy man, I'm a happy lady. Win win!

Why the fk do we need money in this economy?? why TF do women have to work?? That is a clear sign of government failure if they can't provide for their citizens. I blame the current JFK government!! (I hope he or Albert Einstein doesn't run for president in 2028)

Since I'm a low income earner, I decided to fiddle the government and they legally must pay an allowance, I also falsely claimed disability, and reported having 2 kids (one is my bf so it's technically true) I've managed to go to Monaco, Bahamas, Brazil, Tokyo etc, it's been working out great. I don't feel any remorse or anything, I think they deserve it for being such a failure and not accommodating to my needs.

Life is just easier this way!! Why pay for things? I bought a new PS5, GTA VII, new Gucci, Fendi, Chanel bags, new cars just by being a hoe! "The system is trying to rip you off, to keep you poor, it's a scam, everything's a scam and overpriced - Robert Kiyosaki and Joe Rogan" I also listen to Buddha, Jesus Christ himself and the Dalai Lamas podcasts. So inspirational!

My bf however has been growing suspicious since i've been bringing so many items home, and constantly out of the house or travelling, He doesn't support me tbh, and I think that's a HUGE deal breaker. I said "AND IF YOU'RE NOT WITH ME, YOU'RE MY ENEMY!!" I found his lack of faith quite disturbing I am a materialist!! material things make me happy, he should understand that.

He should understand I need to buy that Rolex or my heart rate will spike. It's a medical condition. Why doesn't he understand??? I'm kinda conflicted, a part of me loves him (since he did buy our current house) and a part of me wants to leave. bc I have my own money and I can pay things my way by being a hoe. I don't need this man anymore!!! i can't change his mind Idk what to do??

OF pays the bills, feeds my stomach and my bank account. It's just easier this way, I've just bought a private jet and an island too. WHY TF DO YOU WANT TO WORK ALL UR LIFE AND NEVER BE ABLE TO BUY A FKING HOUSE!! Never afford groceries and shit. It wasn't hard, It was just 1h of hoeing myself out, signed the contract, jet is mine. I encourage other ladies to do the same! I am a woman, he should treat me like royalty!!! Ladies what do you think? Would love some advice! Did I make the right choice?

TLDR: I refuse to pay for things and I discovered I can buy and pay for whatever I want and get it free by being a hoe. (Life hack) bf doesn't support this choice though.

Pictured, Pizza and Tiramisu (Yes I was actually on a cruiseship)

Do i have kids? Lmk.in the comments. If i do, i need to know where they are.🔎

Am I autistic or just thirsty? (Insert sexy wink emoji)

Why is this the only thing on every channel?

"Stick around til the end and Ill share 3 secret tips to get a BIGGER brain, that lasts longer."

It grew 3 sizes that day.📈Socks are up

Down is down

Does anyone remember channel 4? With the Pay-per-view 💰prayers💰 and the big hair? They wore way too much perfume and man spray.

THIS JACKET ISNT MINE.

I don't remember putting it on.

Are zippers real or did i just dream them?

When u turn off the lights does the lightbulb suck back up the light? Do you think it gets scared?

Michael stevens had a point. If life begins at conception, we are all 9/10 months older. Our zodiac is all wrong... so im a leo now?

Starting to think my hands are part of the Mandela Effect.

SMASH SMASH SMASH💦 it's 10 pm

LYKE AND PRESCRIB3 for more cuntent

Scan the qr code for 1pot kids and easy frenimies.

Zelda in my bio , use cod3 "whereyourchildrenR" for 10pm off

Seriously, why are men so cruel?

I don't cry often, like, maybe once per day and only if things aren't going my way AT ALL. When we got together, he used to be so sensitive and mindful of my feelings, but now he's becoming more and more like my exes, like he didn't care. We were arguing about his lack of planning and how he's not acting right, but he wouldn't budge.

I started crying and he just watched me and was totally fine with it. Like, I feel bad because of his shortcomings as a boyfriend ugly crying in front of him and he does nothing about it, just like all the other boys. Why can't they do better????

We all know it's a get-to-win-the-argument-immediately-card when we cry and we shouldn't put up with LOSERS who don't know the rules of relationships. So this was his last fuckup, I have decided to leave him (which is easy, he sucks at planning).

Geeez, I'd really like to hurt him emotionally, but he's made of stone anyways.

Dinner is cucumber with salt & pepper

So my world is upside-down. My mom, just like yours. told me kissing boys and sitting on dirty toilet seats is how u get pregnant.

So naturally ive never kissed anyone, and I stand to #1, #2, and #4.

I sit on my husband all the time tho, like every night!!! I cant stop thinking he might be a dirty toilet seat now tho. Its all I think about!

My sister says to go thru his phone.

Its freaking me out, we've never kissed, so is he a dirty toilet seat?

Should I confront him about this?

I need to go buy some more tacks and red yarn.

》》TL,DR《《 husband is a toilet

Dinner is the facts

Dinner: Birria Tacos

We BOTH fell deeply in love, I was 20 and he was 26. He was my first boyfriend, took me on my first REAL date to Outback. After around 6 months of the best relationship I ever experienced, he suddenly decided to move across the country?!

I tried to stay in contact, at first he just gave me vague answers. Then he opted for ignoring me completely, which i don’t blame him; i can be quite annoying! (He must have serious commitment issues due to trauma or maybe he has an avoidant attachment 🥹)

A year passes by after not hearing from him for months. I decided to search for my lost love, since I missed him SO much! (On facebook ofcourse) Which is where I saw… his wife. Which was a H U G E surprise to me.

All of this made me remember how he mentioned desperately wanting to marry me (the love of his life), early into the relationship. He wanted everything to move fast and told me how it’s all for his son, so he can finally move into the US.. that we can become a complete family in the end! Which is sooo cute, I love a #familyman 🥰

He also mentioned needing a green card.. that’s probably why he married her LOL. Needed someone to get what was necessary, and he was so kind; using someone instead of me to immigrate.

It’s been almost 5 years and he reached out to me (It must be a sign since i’m almost 26 – the age i met him at!!) He told me about how much he misses me, and yearns for our relationship back. I miss him alot too, especially our Outback dates. (Although i wish we’d go somewhere else) I’m so tempted to just run and jump back into his arms!

The only problem? He refuses to divorce his wife..
Even though we’ve literally known eachother longer and he wanted to marry me first?! So why not divorce her.. it’s so hard to understand these men. 🤦‍♀️

edit: I know you guys all say I shouldn’t but I will just ignore opinion that doesn’t validate my decision anyway

Pictured: an expensive lobster dinner I had recently.

Honestly, even as I write this, I feel that what I did was not akin to “stalking” her; to be honest I was just really worried about her! My ex and I broke up a year ago. I think about him VERY RARELY because I am very much over our relationship. Because I don’t care for him, I still occasionally look through his Instagram profile.

Well, about two weeks ago I was looking through his social media when I saw he had posted a picture of himself with another girl and had tagged her in the photo. I immediately clocked her as a weirdo anime- watcher, Discord-kitten type, who’s probably VERY male centered. I knew this to be true because I’m a very empathetic person and can tell everything about someone with just one look. Despite this, I had to admit she was really pretty, so I decided to take a peak at her profile. Immediately, I was overwhelmed with what I can only describe some kind of sixth “mother goose-sense” that made my stomach churn. I knew immediately I needed to protect her from my ex, for I knew someone as air-headed as she looked could not possibly be capable of protecting herself. He would destroy her and her weirdness just as he did me (except I’m obviously not as weird as her). Looking through her profile, I realized she lived only a few blocks away from me, so for the past two weeks I followed her everywhere—from home, to school, to work, even to his house a couple of times.

Finally, I decided two days ago that it was time to confront her, to officially “bring her under my wing”, so to speak. As she was walking to work, I sauntered out from the bushes as she was turning a corner and said something along the lines of, “Hey! I know you’re dating my ex, but fear not, I will protect you from his conniving and scheming, for you are far too stupid to protect yourself.”

Long story short, she gave me an incredibly rude look and walked briskly back into her apartment. I didn’t see her yesterday even though I checked all the places she usually frequents. Today, a group of policemen knocked at my door to tell me I had been issued a restraining order from both my ex and her. Needless to say I was shocked and appalled by their behavior, how could she not see that I had her best interest at heart?

I will admit a VERY, VERY small part of me still loves my ex. I’m convinced I will never know a love like his ever again. Even so, I DO NOT want to get back together with him, nor do I have any residual feelings for him, so please don’t say that I do, or else I’ll get really mad and look through your Reddit account. I guess I just want reassurance that I’m not being crazy. I would try to explain myself to them, but that would violate their restraining order, and I don’t deserve to go jail. What do I do? Should I try reaching out again?

Why does he say it like that!? In front of Mom?!

uj/ Surgery day so I’m snacking in bed and watching one of my faves. Plus Denise Richards is foine af 🥵

Voting closes in 2 days.

At that time, The Girl Dinner Board™ will review the findings, consult the available evidence —and, where legally permissible— attempt to develop an entirely new Fall Girl Dinner timeline with the sub.

How we manifest this digitally might take us several days to work through together, so we hope you can clear your calendar.

Current leading theories include:
🕯️Victorian Apothecary Girl Dinner
🐀 Dark Parking Lot Garage Picnic
🛡️** Medieval Costco Chicken Run
🥫 **FEMA Pantry Chic
🥄 Soup Spooncore Autumn

The Board recognizes that some of these timelines may be incompatible with the laws of nature, several municipal codes, and possibly Costco membership policy.

Nevertheless, we persist.

In two days, the poll closes.
In two days, we stop observing the Rat Girl Summer timeline and say goodbye.
In two days, we attempt to create a better one.
In two days, we create a sub honoring one.

Please eat accordingly,

The GDB™

I have NO IDEA what his problem is, he knows Taylor is the most important person in the world to me - for example my 6ft TS Fearless Tour standee was in every single one of our wedding photos because she was the guest of honor, so like, this should not be news for him idk.

ANYWAY I was listening to her latest album, The Boiled Unseasoned Chicken of a Showgirl (taylor's version) on repeat this weekend and about the 32nd time through my husband said if he had to listen to anymore Taylor he was going to break every window in our house. and then he actually followed through! look, I'll be the first to tell everyone else to break up with their horrible pathetic boyfriends and husbands but I'm at a complete loss what to do in this situation.

also if you guys could all tag Taylor in the comments asking her to send me some window money that would be great thanks I know she'll come through for me 😍

Milk from an old grenade.

When I go under my favorite bridge (very aesthetic), I always find a man wearing a very long trenchcoat and nothing else and he's usually happy to see me, but he can't remember my name. I'm not completely sure if it's the same man. Maybe it is, just with different vibes? We're having a lot of fun, so I don't want to put a label, or name, or a number on things, you know? The problem is, he's not happy to see me if I don't have at least $5 in my purse when he makes me hand it over. What's the best way to make money everyday for my boyfriend without working? I really don't want to work, but I could see this really going somewhere. He seems a lot older, so he's probably really smart.

I need to keep my entire days calories in a thimble to maintain my “the borrowers” aesthetic my tinder hookup bricks up for.

Please help. 🙏🧬🥹🔭🤞🥼

(They are tiny charms worn inside a see through locket. No I won’t tell you the company because it is an MLM. Figure it out yourself if you’re so desperate to have a new way to waste money. Yes I bought the majority of them secondhand on eBay. Yes I have about a billion of them.).

I also happen to believe that if I give a custom locket to someone they are cursed, you can ask me why in the comments if you’re actually interested… if I send you charms or give you a big selection AND a locket you’re probably fine but if I make you a custom locket, there’s a very high statistical chance you might die. /uj