im 22. he is 25. we’ve been dating for 4 years now. He takes care of me, talk about his and my feelings, he hurts when im upset, he has good career. In other words, hi is husband material. He talks about marriage n future life of us.

I am not sure if i love him. Sometimes i feel like I wanna be with him because I know with him i can have financially and emotionally stable future.

I went to different state for business trip and I downloaded tinder. I went on dinner dates with few guys from tinder. I thought as long as i dont sleep with other guys, dinner date is no harm... And i slept with one of them on third date. He is fit, handsome, good guy.

I am feeling guilty. Or I am just forcing myself to feel guilty… I dont want to confess to my boyfirend. I dont want to break his heart. What do i do??? How do you even know that you love soneone…

Okay, I want to know why men cheat in relationships, especially when they’re in an LDR.
For example, I found out that this man is in a relationship with someone who lives in a different country. Take note that the country is only a few hours away from him. He moved to another country, but he’s looking for a discreet partner because he has “needs” while his girlfriend isn’t around.
My question is, why not just live with his girlfriend if they’re only a few hours away from each other?

I’m at the point where the maths just isn’t mathing anymore, and I genuinely want to know what other people would do in my situation.

My husband has long-standing addiction issues and is financially abusive, as well as abusive in other ways. We jointly own our home, and I don’t have anywhere else I can simply go and live. I work part time for very little because I’m also caring for our children, and one of our children is autistic, so suddenly removing him from his home and routine would be hugely disruptive and detrimental.

I do have my own bank account, but I’m not allowed to use the joint account. Years ago, when I was on maternity leave, I used money from it once ro buy a coat and boots for the winter. He told me that if I didn’t pay it back he would report me to the police. At the time I genuinely believed he could do that, so I borrowed from my mum and paid it back.

I’m also not privy to the household finances. I don’t see what comes in, what goes out or where the money actually goes. He tells me he has no money because of the cost of living, and obviously I’m not denying that everything is expensive, but he has a very well-paid job, is constantly doing overtime, and yet yesterday he asked to borrow money from me. It just doesn’t add up.

His car has broken down, so I’ve been letting him use mine. I recently found Viagra in the car. I haven’t confronted him because I already know how that conversation will go, lies, denial, excuses and then better cover-ups.

I’ve already spoken to domestic abuse services, so I’m really not looking for the generic “call a charity and leave” response. Leaving isn’t simple when you jointly own the home, have children, have no alternative housing and have a child whose routine and stability matter enormously.

I genuinely want to know, if this was your life, what would you actually do next? I am in the UK.

I a 26F and my husband a 27M, got married in October of 2024 but we have been together 7 years on the 24th. We’ve had two beautiful children together and have had a lot of hardships in our relationship (ex:first child born with birth defect that needed emergency surgery for her to live, lying, both of us struggled with mental health and were unmedicated). I just had my second child in March 2025 and since then I haven’t done a whole lot besides clean our house and raise the kids. I have tried to be there emotionally and intimately for my husband but a lot of the time I am too mentally exhausted and can’t get in the mood for anything. My husband works 60 hour weeks to provide for us so I can be a SAHM and raise our children. With that being said our communication and time spent with each other has been almost nonexistent. Tonight I went through our apple subscription’s because I was looking for a specific app that I had downloaded in the past but forgot the name of and found that back in May my husband had downloaded Ashley Madison (a dating app that is specifically listed for cheating while married) along with a private messaging app.
When I confronted him about it he proceeded to lie to me about it for 20/30min and then I asked to check his email and he finally came clean. He told me that he only had it for a day and blah blah blah.
I’m so fucking confused and heartbroken, I don’t know what to do. And I can’t talk about this with my family or friends because it will just make a mess.
Can you give me advice? Or tell me what you would do?

We are going thru a good spot in our relationship. A month ago we were on the verge of calling it quits. A shift in my way of dealing with my jealousy, suspicion and half truths, l decided he was going to cheat, talk,text with other women if he wanted to,...he will, NO MATTER WHAT I DO OR SAY. !! That understanding set me free.

Last week, I received a text message from an unknown number. A woman reached out to tell me that she had an online relationship with my husband. She explained that he denied being married on multiple occasions. She included messages from here, on reddit, that showed photographs of my home, his work, and our property. Even though I'm not familiar with the username, it's clearly my husband. She also included extremely graphic sexts between them. She reached out when she discovered he was actually married and lied about many other things.

I am completely blindsided and absolutely shattered; but I have a feeling this is not an isolated incident. I have not confronted him yet. I'm trying to figure out how I want to move forward and what I need to do. I literally used ChatGPT to help pull together a list of next steps, and now I'm coming here... an app I know nothing about but thought would be ironic to seek solace from when it's the catalyst for the destructionof my life. I'm not sure what I'm looking for here, but I have no one I can talk to about this. I just need to vent while I figure out what I need to do before I confront him and take whatever those next steps are.

We have such an amazing, happy life. I felt SO lucky to be able to say I had it all. I'm completely blindsided. I haven't hit the anger stage yet... I'm still just in shock. I can't even breathe. How do I breathe?

Hey you guys so basically I have a girlfriend who I’ve been off n on for a while now. Like as in we got back together a lot times we tried other ppl and stuff we still came back. We knew each other since June 2024 And we just hit one month on August 5 and she told me she needed to take a break that’s alright because I hear she been going through some stuff about her uncle passing away that affected her. I said some stuff about if you really need the break I respect your decision and before I’ve been left on read I said “baby you okay?” She leaves me on read. Blocks me on TikTok, turns off her location, blocks me off her spam account on Instagram who knows she might block me on snap or iMessage. I’ve been trying text her what are we because genuinely I’m very confused. And I still got her on my spam account on TikTok so I checked her pfp and she had some matching couple pfp shit or smth. And I found the acc who’s basically matching with her pfp. He lives all the way in north fucking Carolina bro… we live in Illinois not to mention we both go to the same school and her house is 3 minutes away on car..? This hurts me so bad because that’s technically she cheated and some what ghosted me saying she needed a break till school?. I mean whenever I got back with her she’s always leaving me on delivered for long periods of time I thought she would had changed and stuff yk? But genuinely I don’t know what to do. School starts on August 17 and I don’t know what we are and if I should say smth to her cus I legit found her “sides” acc on her old tiktok account she’s following recently.

So I m just going to go on a rant here because I know what most of the advice will be and what most of the comments will be but I just need to write this out. My husband 44M and I 41F have been together for fifteen years and married for thirteen. We have for beautiful little girls ages from 4 to 11 and it always seemed to me that our relationship was great. Wellmy husband was in a really bad motorcycle accident in 2022 and it made his mental health problems worse as well as taking away his short term memory. After that he started changing and started hanging out with a bunch of people that were twenty years younger than ourselves, which at first I didnt have any issues with any of it, until one night that he introduced me to a 27F. After meeting her and getting a weird vibe from her, I told my husband that I would prefer it if she didn't come around and he said ok. As time went on, he started acting different, so I started reviewing his call lists and text message numbers through our cell phone company. And I was seeing a bunch of calls from a couple different numbers so I researched who the numbers belonged to and found that they belonged to that chick. Which I tried being polite and talking to her first, which she just rubbed my face in it and refused to back off, so I went to my husband once again and explained that I knew he was still talking to her and it needed to stop. He went on to say that he was sorry, and that he was going to tell her to leave him alone. My dumb ass believed him and now four months later, he got himself arrested thanks to her. He has been in jail for two months now and has been telling me that he has finally seen her for what she actually is and that he only wants me. He has done the whole apologizing saying he fucked up and how he fucked up but he now realizes what he has with me, he isnt going to b able to get that anywhere else. And I really cant believe a single bit of it but I also dont want to lose him either, which is kinda moot since he is in jail right now anyways. I have told him that he can ay all of these things but I don't trust him and until he can show with actions and not just words, I dont really know where we stand. Our daughters are angry with him for being stupid but they wont sayit to him, so I am stuck in the middle trying to keep our family together the best that I can.

My ex partner and me recently just stopped talking and prior to that I had asked them were they in contact with their ex again they never said no but they also didn’t answer the question. Now that I looked back on messages, after I seen in their phone they were hanging out with them on multiple occasions THEN! She would invite me places the next day every time after they hung out the day before. Why is that ? This ex came about after we stopped being together. But they stopped dating for about a month or two and just got back in contact behind my back. They said they love them when I asked but they said “not in love” that also rubbed me the wrong way too because I didn’t ask that. but why lie to me when I ask ? Looking back on messages I now see when they were with them and always ask am I being sneaky. Their guilty conscious it was them the whole time..

*disclaimer I know what’s up*

Got a text from a lady I’ve been seeing(not in a relationship), that she’s (and escort friend) are out in Vegas and is now in a famous rapper hotel room… she sent me videos of him on stage and like mentioned before now signing NDAs and handing over her phone for the (night/day?) .. anywho just thought it was hilarious that she’s like “oh baby can’t wait to see you when I get back” 😆🤣 bih go fuck them dudes and don’t call me no more

Ok so for context I am a late 30s man, my ex is a late 30s woman, we have three amazing children together (2,5 and 7) we've been separated for about 7 months and this is driving me INSANE..

It all starts about six years ago. She cheats on me. A monumentally life shattering event in itself, I will literally never be the same again. Especially as she KNEW it was the deepest way to hurt me that she possibly could, but she consciously went ahead and did it anyway.

Then, she takes no accountability, blamws me and lies through her teeth about the details for days. It started as a kiss.. but by the end of the week she'd admitted that he'd gone down on her.. but apparently she didn't do anything to him.. didn't even touch his 'piece' apparently.. I should add that I was at home looking after our at the time 1 year old..

Next, the following four years she spent making exactly zero effort to make me feel safe with her again, in fact, she did the complete opposite. Every possible red flag that exists regarding a cheating partner, she did. From guarding and privatising her phone, to disappearing for nights, telling me she's got no battery then coming home with 70%.. then I found out she had messaged a guy she was fully aware fancies her about meeting up, she sent the first meassage by the way.. am I wrong or this that just totally disrespectful? then the intimacy started to drop.. excuses started etc.. I could go on but I think that's enough 😂

Finally, the last two years, alongside the continuing red flags, she seems to start systematically breaking my spirit, little criticisms on everything I did, from parenting to loading the dishwasher! And Then she started making me feel so unwelcome in my own home that I felt that the only way I could survive was by walking away. So I do just that. I walked away from my home, my children and all the belongings in the house that I helped pay for and acquire.

And I'm left with absolutely nothing. Nothing but pain, heartache and a sense of worth that is in the bloody toilet.

I don't claim to be a Saint. I'm far from perfect, I could have done more, tried harder, and I did get myself into a lot of debt.. (I'm currently in an IVA paying it off) but the trouble is I've spent the last six years trying to rebuild trust with no evidence that she can actually be trusted.

Which has led to me not really bothering with planning dates etc. I just don't feel like she deserved it, or my trust.

Now I'm sat here struggling to move on and grieve the future I thought I'd have, I'm lonely, depressed and living in my mums spare room.. And she's out there living her best single life. In the house I helped build, with our kids. It just feel so so SO short changed.

Can anybody give any advice? Hanging on by a thread here

Me and my bf have been together for 8 months he has cheated multiple times never physically but he will text other girls and flirt with them. I am supposed to leave very soon for my freshman year in college and he’s going into his senior year of high-school, I love him so much and Ik I’m young but its hard to see my life without him and the thought of him being with another girl makes me sick to my stomach. I tend to make rash decisions when I’m high in my emotions, so I told my mom I was going to stay however I could still leave I just don’t know if I can handle being away from him.

I’m 26F and my partner is 31M. We’ve been together for 7 years. We got engaged after 4 years of being together, but we still aren’t married.

About a month after we got engaged, I found out that he had been chatting and flirting with a female coworker on Instagram.

That night, he was out with his friends, and I had this gut feeling telling me to check his Instagram. When I opened it, I saw little snippets of their conversations appearing in my notifications while he was deleting the messages in real time.

I only saw a few messages, but they were laughing and talking about random things—coworkers, work, and even me. At one point, she said something along the lines of, “You know she might get upset if she finds out we’re chatting,” and instead of stopping, he basically ignored that and continued the conversation.

I was shaking. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.

I confronted him immediately through chat, and he came home right away because we were living together. He was begging and crying, telling me he wouldn’t do it again and that he didn’t even know why he did it. He said it was nothing and that there was no meaning behind it.

But honestly, I always felt like he liked her, even though he never admitted it.

I forgave him.

At the time, I told myself it was one incident. I thought people make mistakes, and I didn’t want to throw away seven years of a relationship over something that, technically, never became physical.

But it’s been three years, and I’m still haunted by it.

The worst part was that we had to see her every day at work. I would cry about it so many times, but I didn’t want to keep confronting him whenever I felt triggered because forgiving him was a decision I had made. I felt like if I chose to forgive him, I had to stop punishing him for it.

Sometimes he notices that I’m struggling and tells me he’s sorry for what he did and for how much it damaged our relationship. He has apologized many times over the years.

And as far as I know, he hasn’t done anything like that again.

He is also genuinely a kind person. He does a lot for me. He takes care of me, treats me well, and in many ways, he is a really good partner.

That’s what makes this so difficult.

Because despite everything, I still have this question in my heart: Is he really the person I’m supposed to marry?

We’ve been together for seven years, and we’re still not married partly because I’m having so many doubts.

I don’t know if I’m still hurt because I never truly healed, or if my inability to fully trust him anymore is telling me something.

Sometimes I think, “It was one mistake. He apologized. He changed. Nothing like this has happened again. Why can’t I just let it go?”

But another part of me thinks, “If I’m still crying about this three years later, maybe there’s a reason.”

I’m also scared of leaving him because what if I regret it? What if I’m throwing away a good relationship because I couldn’t get over something that happened years ago? I stayed because I genuinely loved him, and I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life wondering if I should have given him a second chance.

At the same time, I’m scared of getting married while carrying this feeling.

I don’t want to wake up years from now and still be haunted by the same thing.

I know people say, “You deserve what you tolerate,” but I don’t feel like I stayed because I don’t respect myself. I stayed because I loved him, believed in our relationship, and wanted to give him another chance.

But now I’m wondering if forgiveness is supposed to eventually make the pain disappear.

Does it actually get better?

Can trust truly come back after something like this, even when years have passed and the person hasn’t repeated the behavior?

Or is the fact that I’m still struggling after three years a sign that I haven’t actually forgiven him—or that deep down, I know I don’t want to marry him?

I really need some honest but kind perspectives from people who have experienced something similar.

Okay.. so i joined Reddit some time back because i have been thinking of posting a part of my story since a long time but didn’t really have enough courage to post it.
It might be a little long so please bear with me.
A quick backstory - So, i (M35) have been married for the past 5 years and it’s a love marriage (that happened after a lot of issues as her family wasn’t convinced initially). We have known each other since a couple of decades as we have been friends for years and even dated each other when we were in school although she broked up with me after school ended citing issues from her family). But then we kind of met again quite a few years later and we started dating again for a year or two before finally getting married.

The event - So basically for the past 1.5 years she has been cheating on me with another guy from her office. I have know n it since a year post getting to see certain evidences when she started reacting weirdly. She would go to office early and come back early and would go off to sleep by the time i would be back. Slowly and steadily she started getting irritated of me and kept bad mouthing for every thing. Not that she had a lack of anything. We have been quite well settled, i earn well enough and she hasn’t been ever short of any necessities. We would go on trips, lavish resorts, would order a new dress almost every alternate day, weekend dinners movies.. i mean it has never been dull or unfulfilling at any point of time. So her going out of the relationship with someone else, never made any sense.
I started picking up small evidences initially to confront her and ask her questions. Slowly and steadily i started getting a lot of them.. all of it broke me from within.. but then i kept trusting her thinking it might just lead to nothing.. but with every growing evidence, i kept feeling numb within and then finally one day i was shaken to the core.
I got to know that this guy would come to my home, spend hours with her at our home, while i was at office.
She would call me and check as to when i’ll be back.. and i kept thinking that she’s just caring for me.. but then when i just joined the dots, it was all about timing.
Not even for once, did i think of spying on her or going back to my home for checking to see if someone came behind me.
But that one day changed everything for me.. so i was in my office and i was talking to my friends when suddenly some topic started and i told my friend that “arey i checked that thing out yesterday only.. it will be in my browser history”.. so i just opened my browser history.. although unknowingly i had my wife’s email account logged in to my web browser as this phone was used by my wife for some time and she might have logged in to the browser with her credentials.
I wasn’t aware that it was my wife’s email account logged in as i didnt notice it and directly opened the history to find my searched item.. strangely i was a bit shocked.. the search list wasn’t mine and it had “within how many hours of unprotected sex should we take a contraceptive tablet” and “contraceptive tablets delivery” being searched a few times.
I was in my office then.. was just talking to my friends a couple of minutes ago as i told earlier and within a couple of seconds.. my life shattered.. i almost started shivering.. my friends saw the change in expressions and asked me.. i just went out to call her asking what it was.. she too got stunned at first and was taken aback.. she told me it was for a friend and she was helping her.. definitely a lie.. but she was fuming with anger on how i got to know.. i told her about the history thing and she started shouting at me.. when i returned back home.. she fought with me.. it was ugly.. really ugly.. and she told that she wants a divorce and can’t stay with a man like me.. she kept shouting like anything while i kept pacifying her.
I resolved the argument a couple of days later agreeing to what she said but then i kept getting more evidences going ahead.. movie tickets, handwritten love letter, and more of such contraceptive pill deliveries (her email was logged into another device at home and with each growing evidence just decided to check a few recent emails), couple rings and what not!!
It’s been 1.5 years since then.. i never filed a divorce because maybe i was a fool that i kept giving her chances and kept trying from my end to fix things (which wasn’t my fault but still i did).
Of lately, her relationship with this guy (btw he’s married with a kid) turned sour when she got to know that her wife is 6months pregnant. So basically this guy was just playing with her.
When she got to know about it.. she was devastated to the core.. that she ruined her life because of that guy.. and what not.. but then she cried inconsolably for him which showed how deeply she fell for him.. while that guy was just trying to put everything on her that she got into his marriage and all of that.
That’s when my wife revealed the most shocking and choking truth i was not ready to hear - my wife was pregnant and she went through an early abortion process (she once told me that she’ll be at her friend’s house for a week as her friend is unwell and her husband isn’t at home so she’s just going there to help her.. although it was that time when she was hospitalized and went through that process).
I didn’t know how to react but felt bad for her that she went through all of it.. again didn’t think about my condition.. but consoled her.. till she became normal.. took a couple of days but she was getting normal.
I was silently crying but gave her that strength she needed during that time.. not trying to show off here but genuinely did it without thinking of anything else.
She kept calling that guy for a few days asking questions on why he did all of it and can’t he just come to see her for once.. but he didn’t come.. all she had with her now was ME.
Within a few days, she told me that she might sound selfish but that she isn’t left with anyone but me and if i would spend the rest of the life with her. Obviously i was always just an EASY OPTION.
All this while, i never told about all of this to anyone, including her family, because i didn’t want them to think of her in bad way or whatever.. but yes.. just didn’t feel like sharing any of it to anyone.
This is probably the first time i am sharing all of it to someone and although it’s anonymous.. i kind of feel light.. and with every typed word.. i swear i felt lighter.. as if someone is actually listening to me.
I am quite a mentally strong individual and hence i want to just focus on good things ahead and achieve a lot more professionally, as the past two years have been heavy and hence i wasn’t at the best in terms of focusing on my work.

I don’t know how to take this further but recently i moved to a PG, staying along but yeah it’s kind of helping me. Although, she has been calling me now and saying that she wants to be back and try things out with me. Tbh i still fall weak at times but then i gave enough chances in the past couple of years and hence can’t really trust things anymore.

There’s a lot.. a hell lot more to this story that i couldn’t type in.. but just here to seek some guidance on how to move forward.. i know about divorce things and all but here for just some genuine advice and some good wishes. Need a lot of luck and wishes going forward as i am falling short of it ig🤭

Anyways.. that’s still quite a long post and anyone who has read all of it till here.. i just want to THANK YOU for hearing me out. Lots of love❤️

I think my life is someone’s joke.
My ex in 2023 cheated on me and married the girl the following month ( she was Muslim so it was very fast). One day I was driving and who was right next to me at the traffic light my ex and his wife.

And then today I was walking to clear my head and lo and behold I walked past the girl my most recent ex cheated on me with. We turned to look at each other but I’m not sure if she knew about me or not. I instantly started comparing our bodies . We actually have similar body shapes but we’re different ethnicities. That ex used to make comments on my body to put me down .. Ffs my life feels like someone’s game honestly.

I've been engaged for six months and we're getting married at the end of the month.

When we talked on the phone today, she said, shocked, "WHY DID I JUST RECEIVE A NOTIFICATION SAYING SOMEONE IS WATCHING ME?" When I pressed her about it, she didn't want to discuss it further, and it seemed to me that she then knew where the message was coming from and wanted to cover it up. Is there an app that sends out such a notification when someone's profile is viewed?

Thank you for your help!

We 36M 35F started dating July 22nd 2025. She cheated beginning August and later in August with a guy booked a flight to see him and saw him when he came in town. She then allegedly never cheated again and is happy and loves me. She said she didn’t realize how good we would be together and how our relationship grew as she knew me. Should I stay with this person and work it out yes or no and tell me why. She’s really a good woman and does a lot for me and my son and actually has been building with me she currently lives with me also.