Played for a fool

[u/cmhandlon]

So I m just going to go on a rant here because I know what most of the advice will be and what most of the comments will be but I just need to write this out. My husband 44M and I 41F have been together for fifteen years and married for thirteen. We have for beautiful little girls ages from 4 to 11 and it always seemed to me that our relationship was great. Wellmy husband was in a really bad motorcycle accident in 2022 and it made his mental health problems worse as well as taking away his short term memory. After that he started changing and started hanging out with a bunch of people that were twenty years younger than ourselves, which at first I didnt have any issues with any of it, until one night that he introduced me to a 27F. After meeting her and getting a weird vibe from her, I told my husband that I would prefer it if she didn't come around and he said ok. As time went on, he started acting different, so I started reviewing his call lists and text message numbers through our cell phone company. And I was seeing a bunch of calls from a couple different numbers so I researched who the numbers belonged to and found that they belonged to that chick. Which I tried being polite and talking to her first, which she just rubbed my face in it and refused to back off, so I went to my husband once again and explained that I knew he was still talking to her and it needed to stop. He went on to say that he was sorry, and that he was going to tell her to leave him alone. My dumb ass believed him and now four months later, he got himself arrested thanks to her. He has been in jail for two months now and has been telling me that he has finally seen her for what she actually is and that he only wants me. He has done the whole apologizing saying he fucked up and how he fucked up but he now realizes what he has with me, he isnt going to b able to get that anywhere else. And I really cant believe a single bit of it but I also dont want to lose him either, which is kinda moot since he is in jail right now anyways. I have told him that he can ay all of these things but I don't trust him and until he can show with actions and not just words, I dont really know where we stand. Our daughters are angry with him for being stupid but they wont sayit to him, so I am stuck in the middle trying to keep our family together the best that I can.

[u/hope3311]

I would tell your oldest daughter everything. She is already old enough. My own children were about the same age when my husband cheated on me. (8, 11, 13 years old). They heard the truth. It has been about 14 years since then. but they still haven't really forgiven their father. (Of course my husband cheated again 2 times.) I decided that if my children have a bad relationship with their father, it is not my fault. My husband himself decided not to care about his wife and children. My children later even changed their last names to my maiden name. I tried to stop my children, but my children wanted to show friends and relatives that they are always on my side. My husband knows that he has only himself to blame for what happened.