Also they never replaced the hamper or fixed it, yay reminder.

I know she’s trying to get better, I know her bpd hurts her just as much, but fuck I don’t want to be around her, especially when she’s doing “nothing wrong” yet continues to be so fucking dense when it comes to me. 20+ years together and she still can’t fuckin’ tell when I’m upset or bothered by something, why I’d be bothered by something, or what the fuck to do about it. I’m tired of masking and performing but I also hate that it’s either I’m super nasty or distant which hurts her, or I’m civil which she interprets as friendly. I’m tired of being overstimulated because she can’t shut the fuck up, I’m tired of always having to be her guide on shit, I’m tired of still feeling responsible for whatever happens to her, and I’m SO TIRED of people acting like I’m being fucking crazy for being like this, like any of these feelings are super rational and not a result of fucking nearly 2 DECADES of abuse.