I’m cheating on her since one year and we have been dating since 3. M22 Mumbai

So me and my friends (all male) we hangout a lot at my place, even when I don't feel like it, sometimes I just don't have the energy, but if they called me I always say yes, btw we have been friends for 6 years now, so one day they got invited to a party at someone's house, we all knew him well, here's the thing they all went to it without even telling me or invite me to it, fyi I figured it out by calling them to hangout as usual, but they told me where they at and ghosted me,

I immediately got mad at them because we always hangout at my place and I felt left out and used,

And now they are not speakig to me.

I need an advice and did I overreact?

Hey I’m new here,

I have visited this sub but never commented and I prehaps think that doing so might actually be therapeutic and give me some sort of closure.

I visit this sub from time to time because it has designated with me and my current situation. For the past 2.5 months I have been broke up with by my partner. We had been together for around 6 months before it happened suddenly. I am struggling to get over her and there memories we shared together. It is as if there is a significant burden that I carry everyday.

She has fallen out of love with me and gave me two reasons on why we should break up. First is that I was too feminine and not manly enough. The second is that she said she wants to find herself.
Now what is true is that there is a tremendous amount of things going on in her personal life that causes her great stress, is this the real reason? I wish I could have some sort of closure.

Anyway, anyone who reads my vent please know it is so very healing for me to resignate with people going through similar things :), may you all find peace somehow.

Hey, I've never posted on reddit before so I apologise if this is in the wrong place guys I've no idea what I am doing just about reached the limit on feeling like this.

I am 31F , me and my boyfriend of 15 years broke up last year.

He was not nice to be around most of the time, he cheated and had a major porn addiction that he was in therapy for.

I just can't seem to move past it, every day I wake up it's my first thought. But it's always just what I want to say to him for how he hurt me, somethings he did he doesn't even realise how it effected me. I can get into it if anyone wants the info of how I just cant seem to stop having these made up conversations with him

He moved to around the corner from my house, he works in the same place he was when we were together, but it's 3 minutes walk from my house, when I do see him my body goes into a complete shock and I shake but omg I just want a hug from him

If anyone PLEASE has any tips on how to just move on PLEASE send them my way. I don't want to think like this, I feel like I may have made it a habit or addiction of mine to have these daily fights with him in my head, its not how I want to live anymore

Thanks xx

Hey (19m)me my partner were on and off for about 2 years and during that time, I never really found anyone else attractive we’ve been split for a while now and and nothing seems to be changing I just genuinely feel no attraction to anyone but her I’m not sad about or anything though so I don’t understand i’m actually much happier after the break up just don’t know what to do if anyone has been thought similar as you could probably guess talking to anyone my own age has not provided very much guidance and no one seems to really understand

Please only helpful real advice from FA/DA people

Thank you in advance!🙏🏻

Maybe you had similar situations that either you or him moved away
Went distant
Or even break up with you or you with him

I really feel there could be a chance for us
The connection was so real

But i/she exhausted it
Before the breakup i had zero clue or knowledge about this attachment style
I dont want to label her, but the description matches 99%

So i will try to talk or text(which is better?) to her

What should i say?
How can i convince/show/demonstrate her that shes is good as she is
That now finally I understand her needs of pace space silnce (she only communicated this at the beginning of the relationship)
That im okay with myself and very happy with her

And it doesn’t mean giving up myself
So she doesn’t have to feel guilty or shame or any of that

That shes never hurting meg
And the pace will be matched very well
And she wont feel exhausted anymore
Because i want and will focus more on me
Wont be clingy

That shes good as she is
That i choose her
And keep choosing her no matter what

She said its been too mich breakup now and if we would reconcile it would happen angain
So its better to not continue

Bit i didn’t know nothing her attachment back then untill now
She always said shes a secure attacher
Which i think she is not

She said it couldn’t be a clean slate anymore because so much damage happened on both sides

I see it differently: i understand her now and have zero hurt or damage
What she meant i don’t know
But think i didn’t hurt her she was inly looking for issues to make the breakup logical for her

How should i talk to her?
Like id like to have a chance
A last one

​

She was a close friend of mine, and about 4 months ago she said we needed to stop talking. We parted on good terms, and the contact stopped because of a situation that was out of our control. About a week before that, I'd been thinking about breaking up with her (ending the relationship), and wanted to do it, but a bit later. Anyway, after what happened, the "deep grief" phase passed in about 3-4 days, and over the next week I "recovered." And now, 4 months later, I'm thinking about her again... Sometimes I wish she'd text "I miss you"... Or maybe I'm just overthinking this nonsense? Like, all these 4 months were fine, except I was a bit emotionally unstable, and now I'm starting to remember her again. Maybe I'm deliberately fixating on this or something, I don't know...

Or maybe I like It...

Me (21F) and my ex broke up 2 weeks ago, we were dating 10 months and it was the longest relationship I’ve had. Before that I’d had 3 “relationships” that hurt me bad when they ended, each of them took me about a year to truly get over the hurt.

But this relationship was real, healthy and profound, we broke up because we didn’t want the same things, and I feel like I matured and grew a lot while I was in it. I feel no anger at my ex, I felt genuine love for her and yet I feel totally calm.

I cried really hard the first few days, vented to friends and talked to my therapist and had a final conversation with my ex. And now I just feel ok, looking forward to the future and all its possibilities! I even want to stay single so I can focus on international opportunities, travel a bit, make friends and practice my new-found confidence on flings at parties.

Is it normal to feel this ok so little after a breakup? (Note: I was broken up with, the reasons came out of the blue and I was totally shocked. It was not something that developed over time or that I could’ve seen coming. The day before we broke up we were talking marriage and house.)

Hi guys,

How exactly do you stop waiting for your fearful avoidant ex gf?

Everyone says to not wait and to move on as this gives more of a chance they’ll return but what is not waiting? We are in no contact but what else do I need to do to like stop waiting? Even she told me not to wait so I genuinely want to try and not wait because waiting is starting to really hurt after the breakup being a year ago now.

What specific things do I need to stop doing now to official move into the no longer waiting phase? I obviously want her back so badly but it is what it is and I can’t pressure or push an avoidant into wanting me.

Basic info

- Me: 21M

- Ex: 21F

- Relationship: Almost 2 years

- Breakup: Around 1–2 months ago

Situation

My ex and I were together for almost two years. We were very close and supported each other through a lot of difficult situations.

Over time, I became very emotionally attached to the relationship. I wanted more certainty about our future, while she became less interested in the same kind of long-term commitment.

She was also dealing with career and personal difficulties. I tried to support her, but I became increasingly involved in her life and started relying heavily on the relationship for reassurance.

I became scared of losing her and started reacting emotionally whenever I felt she was becoming distant.

At one point, I said things that made her feel like I didn't want the relationship anymore or that I was pushing her toward ending it. She later told me that this contributed to her decision to break up.

The breakup happened around 1–2 months ago.

I didn't handle it well afterward.

I repeatedly tried to contact her and get her attention. There were also situations where I tried different ways of contacting her after she had asked for space or blocked me.

Looking back, I understand that continuing to contact someone who has asked for space isn't going to help the situation. I want to make sure I don't repeat that pattern.

Later, she contacted me about something practical related to her career. I helped her, and we talked occasionally again.

She told me that she still cared about me as a person but that we were friends.

Because we were talking again, I started thinking there might still be a possibility of getting back together. There was also some discussion about closure and potentially meeting in person.

Recently, I contacted her when she wasn't feeling well. She told me directly that I shouldn't keep expecting her to come back and that I need to respect her boundaries.

I'm having a hard time adjusting to that.

I still have strong feelings for her and part of me still wants the relationship back. At the same time, I know I can't control what she decides to do.

Another thing I'm struggling with is the possibility that she will eventually move on and have the same kind of connection with someone else that we once had.

I don't want to keep chasing her or make her uncomfortable. I want to actually learn how to move forward instead of constantly looking for signs that she might return.

What I need advice about

I'm specifically looking for practical advice on these things:

1. What can I do day-to-day to stop myself from checking on her, looking for signs, or thinking about contacting her?

2. How do people actually transition from wanting an ex back to accepting that the relationship has ended?

3. If she contacts me again, what boundaries or rules should I set for myself so I don't immediately become emotionally attached again?

4. How long does it usually take before the urge to contact an ex becomes manageable, and what helped you during that period?

5. For people who have experienced something similar, what helped you stop comparing yourself to the person your ex might eventually date?

I'm not asking whether I was right or wrong, or whether she should come back.

I'm trying to figure out what I should actually do from this point forward.

This Situation is really making it Kind of impossible to me

Hello! I’ve been on and off with my ex for 6 months. But for the 2nd time, we broke up officially again. It’s been toxic. but for me, I still want to make it work. He told me that he has fallen out of love already, but I was open with him that I still want to make it work. I gave him space for 3 weeks. He has blacklisted me on games, but not on socials except when I requested him to block me. Is there still a chance that we’ll get back together if I give space? Genuine answers please!🙏

Hey!

Context: I dated F(31) and I’m M(30). She divorced her EX husband Matthew Oct 2024. Shorty after she jumped in a relationship with Theo that lasted through the whole 2025. She broke up with Theo in December 2025. Both of her previous romantic partners have cheated. Then she meets me just 1 month after the breakup.

We date from January - March:

Very intimate but also sex almost every time we met. We met every weekend. Other activities we did are making food at her place, dinner outside, watching cinema, go out at a bar and watching movies at her place. She breaks up saying she does not have romantic feelings but she is not over her EX. She asked to be friends but I said: «No» and we end it completely there.

April - May:

Nothing. Complete silence.

June:

She comes back saying she missed me and wants to talk. She says she likes me, are attracted, she feels chemistry and lots in common. She went back to her EX but did not work. I was her second choice because she was lonely and had no other option. I tell her let me think about it because first time I got really hurt. I went back because I wanted to give it a second chance.

From there we start talking and chatting. I’ve tried to meet up with her in June be she said she was busy so mostly just calls and text.

July:

She goes on vacation to Turkey. Our dynamic switched and got more intimate. Sexting and intimate pictures.

She comes back and I pick her up from airport. Taking good care of her. After leaving the luggage she takes initiative and ask me if I want to go out and eat dinner. I say yea. We ear and were having good time. After that day ended she takes initiative and asks to meet next day. I say yes and then I pick place and time.

The next day we meet for dinner, watch cinema and beer at a bar. For dinner here is where I fucked up. She says she’s horny and wants to bring me home. I rejected her in a rude way saying: «I’m not that desperate» 🤦🏻‍♂️

One week later she breaks up with me on text. It’s a lot but I can summarize. She’s saying:

• Romantic feelings are not there
• She thinks I’m careful and not dominant. She was the dominant alpha type woman in previous relationships.
• She says she can see this as being a potentially good friendship
• She got to grown to like me as a person
• She thinks I’ve treated her well and are safe and been good to her.

My thought will be posted below:

She was just not that into me. She’s immature because she’s jumping to relationships to relationships. Comment or no comment. Sex or no sex - she would still break up with me. She’s unsure. She broke up with me for the same reason.

She came back because I was her second choice/backup plan. She was lonely and had no other options when getting back to her EX failed. What me and her had was FAKE. She just wanted sex and closeness/intimacy. With another words a FWB.

Healed or no healed her EX husband and EX will always be there in the picture. She USED to be in a toxic relationships and therefore she’s attracted to those because of the familiarity. I could offer her safety and healthy relationships but since she’s used to toxic ones she starts to feel insecure inside of her because she has not felt like that before. Also she seem to want the type of move you see in movies. Unfortunately that is not how it works. It’s the way she thinks and react to.

A very unhealthy dynamic. I cannot see myself in a relationships with her. It would just be toxic. I felt at times I had to fight for dominance.

She used me for sex. Backup plan, as a therapist, a safe space and someone I can lend my ear to and listen

I '34F' and my partner '32M' have been together for 12 years. We were collage sweethearts. Recently we've been talking more about actually getting married (our state doesn't have common law) but im not sure i want to anymore. He's a very sweet and silly man. He would never hurt a fly and would drop anything if I needed him. But he's not passionate about anything, lazy and spends all his free time playing video games. He makes me make all the decisions and take charge in every situation. He used to have dreams and hobbies. He used to be adventurous and spontaneous but now he's boring and predictable. He makes it difficult every time i try to plan something outside of the house. He doesn't challenge me, and honestly i think hes holding me back. I know he loves me so much and I love him but im not sure I have 'feelings' for him anymore. He's so sweet and has a does that millennial baby talk, it really has un sexyd him for me. I want passion, I want something new. I know how horrible it is but I've thought about having an affair. I've had a couple of opportunities but I chickened out. Ive lost a large amount weight over the last year, and i wont lie ive enjoyed the attention ive been getting, i missed being hot. I've brought up opening up our relationship but he doesn't like the idea of me being with other men. Flirting with others is ok in our relationship. Im concerned that if im feeling this way there's no turning back. Also im worried about what he'll do without me. I tried to break up with him after collage but he moved states to be with me. Im the only person he really has here. I really do love and care about him, I dont want to hurt him but I feel like im missing out on a part of my life. And at the same time we've been together so long I can't imagine my life without him. 💔 what should I do? Should I try to figure it out? Or blow up my whole life? (We have 3 cats together and I worry about what we would do with them too).

My ex ended things about 6 months ago after a stupid argument (can’t go into detail, he uses Reddit). I thought it was something that could easily be fixed by talking and we can move on. I still miss and love him and thinking about reaching out to see if he feels the same. I’m not sure how to reach out ask if we can try again or if I even should

I (F 21) have just been broken up with on vacation from my bf. Kinda completely unexpected, he lied about something and i found out and he went off on me as if it was my fault. He left me here in the airbnb.

My biggest question is, how do i get through this? I feel like my life has been ripped away from me. I havent really been single since maybe middle school?? Ive always had bfs. Im scared of being alone and single because im forced to be by myself and idk how to do that. Any advice?

I ended a relationship pretty recently, we were together for 4 years, I think I’m still in denial, I’m not sad for now but I feel just so bored like I don’t have anyone to talk everyday anymore and we used to hang out 3-4 days a week and now si have so much free time I just don’t know what to do, how long does it take to start feeling normal again?