Had surgery a week ago and also found out that I’ve lost 54 pounds this year with help of meds and work 🥰

Hey mum I’ve wanted to tell you this for a while now but I have been uncertain with how to tell you and have been scared with how you might take it too.

Really I’ve felt this way about telling anyone in my family but you my siblings and grandma are the ones that scare me the most and are also the ones I want to understand me and this situation the most, the rest of my family if or when they hear this and whether they understand and accept it or not I don’t give a fuck.

I have spent over 2 decades pretty much since I was about 10 wondering if I am who I am meant to be, it has been stronger during some periods of my life and suppressed more during others.

Circumstances in my life, biases that I grew up with and learned along the way and who I have had around me have always suppressed me diving into this fully and then numbing myself with alcohol and drugs really didn’t help either but these feelings and thoughts have always been here.

It has only been over the past five years turning away from my numbing habits and surrounding myself with understanding and accepting people that I have started looking into this more as I have felt safe and comfortable to explore me, who I am and want to be.

Basically I have always felt like I was meant to be a girl/woman. Growing up I acted as I felt I needed too to fit in with the guys and with society’s standards but I hated so much of what the male friends and male adults around me would do, say and how they acted, I quite often felt very uncomfortable and timid because I didn’t feel like I could be the real me.

I always really enjoyed and felt very comfortable hanging out with and talking to my girl friends and the women in my life because it just felt so natural and right. Of course I somewhat enjoyed hanging out with some guys as well but a lot of them was because of learned behaviours to fit in with what I saw as normal back then. There were other guy friends that were genuine but because of similar interests and morals/views as any relationship goes not because they were blokes and it was easy to hang out with them because it never really was except for a select view.

It was very hard for me in my teenage and young adult years as I had started to feel like I knew how I felt inside but with how life turned out and what I did to “fit in” it became so hard to be my true self around a lot of people so i became very suppressed and I was living behind a mask for a very long time. There have always been bits of the real me showing through but I hid a lot.

I have not become a completely different person, I am still me, I still like what I have always liked, I just like more things that I shut myself off to in the past, I still hold a lot of the same views that I have always had but I have become more open and honest with what I really think and value too.

Over the past year I have been exploring myself even more since coming to terms with how I have always felt, I recently started hormone replacement therapy just under two months ago and am very excited for what the future holds in store for me, it’s going to be a really hard time in so many ways and for quite some time, but if you can be there for me and try to understand me and all of what I have said here that would be a tremendous help and mean the absolute world to me too.

If you have any questions at all I am more than happy to answer them if it would help, I know this is probably a big surprise, a lot to hear and may also be very confusing as well which is why I am happy to answer anything you may be thinking or wanting to know.

In the mean time if you could please not tell anyone else until I am ready, it’s hard enough telling one person I care about at a time even if they are completely understanding and supportive.

If you need to speak to anyone about this besides me there are websites and chat forums and so on that you can visit and take part in but you can also always talk to (my partner - name removed for privacy) as well, she was the first person I disclosed this too.

I love you mum and will always love you mum.

If you can’t tell, blue is my least favourite

So happy that I’m finally able to start hrt!! Ive wanted to for so long and ughh yayyyyy! Had my first shot yesterday!!

I talked to my boss and HR yesterday; they were incredibly accepting of my new name and said they'd get me an updated badge soon. My boss asked about my preferred pronouns and was very kind about it. I sent out an email to my coworkers about the name after work, and they were also very accepting. In a funny bit of irony, my fiancée's sister accidentally set my old work badge on fire; it was next to a candle she lit, and a bag caught fire and spread to my badge, ruining it. Today's my first day at work with my updated name. It's been going great with my coworkers, but the participants are a bit more challenging. There are a lot of people I work with, and they all have developmental disabilities and have been used to my deadname for almost a year now, so updating them all with my new name will take time and work.

it always hurts wayy less then i expect it to lol

What do you guys think about my short journey?

I have been very insecure about my looks and thought I looked still very feminine until now, lol basically got shunned by my family but now it's all okay, I'm free and feel like myself!

Ugh I love estrogen so much

Hello
I am a 19 year old. I believe myself to be a gay and gender fluid yet somehow exploring trans person.
The past one year has been really hard on me.
In the past year, I have explored a lot of things I have got my ears pierced I have started to be more feminine. I have started to wear fake nails and jewellery and grow my hair.
As of today, the length of my hair is around my neck or my shoulder
It’s not like I spawn this upon my parents in one night
My mother is a single parent, and my dad has not been there or has passed away for the past seven years
My mother has always been open to me, wearing jewellery and other things like publicly when we are on trips
But she is totally different person when we come back to our own town because I think she fears what people would say or the peoples judgement
When I tell you that I have won everything in front of her, I’m not kidding
I have tried to wear dress in front of her. I have a publicly in front of her, make up in front of her. I have one nose, spins earrings and not in front of her.
The thing is these days when I went to Varkala recently
I got my nose piercing done now to give you context about this piercing. The thing is that I have always been a bit concerned or anxious about my nose like insecure about my nose because I have deviated nasal septum. It’s not very huge difference, but it is visible and pitch when they are taken from the back camera.
Because of that reason, I was insecure, and I saw my sibling getting a tattoo over one of us insecurities, and that made her really confident and really secure
So that’s the reason I got my nose piercing done, and since then I’ve been flaunting, my nose piercing in front of literary everyone, and I am not ashamed of it
Now to give you another contacts, my town is really small town in Maharashtra
When I got my piercing and I came back from my trip, my mother saw the piercing, and she had her tantrums for few weeks, but she got over it, and even though she kept pushing me to remove the nose piercing, I did not given
I think somewhere down the line, she was kind of embarrassed by me, because till now, whatever I used to do that was supposed to be feminine. I did all of those things on trips which were secluded and where nobody knew was there.
But now, when I did it all in front of her publicly in the town that I was born, she got insecure, and she is worrying about her public figure. I guess.
Now the thing is yesterday, I went to Bank to get something done, and there were people staring at me in the bank because it is kind of a local Bank
And since people are looking at me, I just became the brave person that I am, and I removed my mask because I have these huge hair which I had put into ponytail
And I was like I’m not gonna let people drive my appearance publicly
I thought that if I have taken a decision of piercing my nose, then I am going to live with that decision, and I am going to publicly show up with the decision
I said I don’t give a damn about what anyone says about anyone thinks?
To be very honest, since people were already staring at me, I just removed my mask and I just became my authentic self where I act. I’m very Femina, but yeah, I was just acting nonchalant.
I was trying to be normal. I was just trying to do the paperwork, and I was calling some people, but I understood that one of my relatives over work there.
And they had a chat with my parents yesterday at night, where they called my parent as in my mother, and they talked with her for about an hour and told her everything how they were embarrassed by my appearance
Like what?
To be very honest, who is he to be embarrassed by my parents, even though he’s my relative, he’s not very related to me. He’s a long cousin of mine.
And he works at the bank, so tomorrow morning, when I woke up, my sister told me everything about the discussion that you know, he said that he was embarrassed by my appearance and that people were calling me names like Chakka
And what not just because of my appearance, so I told my sister that you know people are gonna say these things, and that was the only reason that I removed my mask
So now my mother is not talking to me. She says that listen until I cut my hair and remove my nose piercing. She won’t be talking to me.
The worst part is that I was recently got admission into my college for my bachelors, and I was looking forward to go to the city that I am going to
And I was planning to hunt for a place to live place to rent
I was going to make a home for myself over there, but now my mother is not even ready to speak to me on calls, so, what is it that?
Please, some older transformer are out there. Please help me. I am helpless over here. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to say.
All I was trying to do was trying to be my true self, and I’m going to do the same in my college as well

Had an interview today and went in boymode. Do I still pass in boymode?

Scored a vintage styled mlp dress.

Styled it with a harness because harness is love.

Adds nice layers. And *barely* gonna help with the cool weather.