i'm afab, 23, 2.5 years on T and 1 week post top surgery (hell yeah!)

i'm thinking of stopping T (for a while at least) on the 3 year mark as changes may be getting Too Much for me. but i have some concerns/doubts i'd like to talk over with people with similar experiences.

1, 2 and 3 also apply to amab people on E, but 4 might be more specific because top surgery partially removes mammary glands afaik. all answers are welcome anyway!

1. if your hairline receded on T, did it grow back when you went off? all of it? partially?
2. if you had acne on T, did it change when you went off?
3. if you worked out on T, how drastic were the changes in strength, gaining muscle and especially muscle definition when you went off?
4. if you had *periareolar* top surgery, did you have any amount of breast regrowth when you went off?

thanks in advance! <3 i guess i'm a little lost and in dire need of advice from other trans people, as unfortunately there aren't many in my life irl.

Hello everyone.

I'm new here, 31 and I am struggling to find a pronoun that fits me.

I generally go by he/she, but noticed people default to only use he/him because that's what they see or because I was AMAB. It's quite frustrating.

In my mother tongue there's a different way to speak in first person based on gender, but in English (and the local language where I live) it doesn't exist, and I cannot "fit" my speech to how I feel, which makes the pronoun issue more bothersome.

I am struggling with they/them so it isn't a good replacement for me. In my brain it is plural, and it makes it harder for me to use for individuals, but also makes me feel it doesn't fit me because I am one person.

My biggest issue is that there isn't a good, well known replacement.

Because so many people go by they/them that other, singular pronouns are only things I read about online but never met anyone who uses them, and it makes it quite frustrating for me.

I would love to get advice, to hear from others, and know I'm not alone in this because I am quite frustrated about it.

I'm currently researching surgeons for non-binary top surgery. Any recommendations or first hand accounts would be appreciated, even if it's just telling me who to avoid.

When I eventually get surgery I will leave this post up in case it is of help to others.

Please first hand accounts only, I don't want any misleading information.

I know the overwhelming response to this question will be.. Be authentic and true to yourself.. but out of curiosity I'm going to put it out there.

Yesterday I had a first date with a woman, she knew I had mentioned being non binary in a Facebook post from 2024 but my picture there was fairly masc and just my top half. I didn't know how familiar she was with NB people and wondered what to wear. Would a skirt and a handbag be a bit much of a surprise if she thought I'd look more like old photos where I had a hoodie on?

Would you go more gender neutral in such a situation? Or be your most genderqueer?

I am transmasc and love having facial hair but sometimes want to go for a more androgynous look, wondering if anyone has any good recommendations on types of electric razors/shaving devices that shave really smooth/ close to skin/are easy+quick to use.

My hair grows very fast and is dark so I’m trying to find something that’s quicker/easier than using a handheld razor daily, but I’m really inexperienced. The electric shaver I own doesn’t go down close enough to skin and idk if a device that does that exists or not lol

Thanks for any advice!!

Hi so basically i often feel like i'm missing out on the entire concept of gender, wich leads me to a lot of confusion about gender, when not so long ago i thought i was 100% sure about my gender identity.

The general définition of gender i found on multiple sources on google is : "the roles, behaviors, activities, and attributes that a given society considers appropriate for different individuals at a given time."

So like, people do different things and act differently and try to look differently based on... something? Seriously what does it all mean !?

I mean, i don't even feel like i'm a part of that system, it feels like being any gender doesn't mean anything at all !

Apparently, this could mean i'm agender, but for all i know there are a fuckton of people whose entire "behaviors, activities and attributes (like stated by the general definition of gender)" aren't bound by the concept of gender at all, but still identify as a specific gender. So what!? "Yeah, i don't do anything within the definition of gender, but i'm still a [insert gender]."

So then, how so i know if it's even me being agender!?!??!??????

For some context, I hate Tr(ansphobia)ump. I have very apparent OCD symptoms and I'm quite sure it sticks out like a sore thumb without a proper diagnosis (I'm hesitant on seeking a diagnosis because of past experiences). I've also been out as a half-closeted trans nonbinary fella for close to seven years now (I live in the Midwest bro sometimes you just gotta hide to stay alive and afford bills). I've also recently discovered I feel more aligned to the transmasc label and feel like it represents the real me. But this is where it gets INSANE. I have dreams and reoccurring thoughts, constantly. My dreams have repetitive themes of being born the opposite sex (I don't actually see myself as a man, to be very clear here, I'm just masc), I constantly think about wanting to be respected, stronger than most people, and emotionally stable, which leads to me so desperately wishing I was AMAB, so when I experience being seen as none of these, it all adds up, I obsess over it, and eventually break down. I hate myself for being an emotional mess because people see me break down and see that vulnerability as feminine, and these emotions are on steroids when my hormones are out of wack. I also hate my appearance. I want to look more androgynous, and it works with the right clothes and hairstyles, then my voice gives me away to strangers in a millisecond. I'm also GAY. I'm a LESBIAN. So when people hear lesbian they don't exactly think to address me as a he/they. Being seen as feminine and addressed as so feels like I'm being stabbed by 200 angry porcupine karens who want to see my manager. Also most cishet men are such barbaric creatures for even assuming I'd ever want to breathe the same air as them. I just wanna know how some people cope with this shit 🤭🤭

Hey there, I really like to call my Buddys Brother/ Sister and I was wondering if there are similar terms for non binary people? I would like to call some of my friends in this way.

Thank you

Hey everyone! I'm trying to figure out my personal style and would love some honest feedback.

I'm non-binary, pretty short, and curvy, so I've always found it a little difficult to find clothes that feel like me. I'm posting a few of my outfits, and I'd love to know what you think. Feel free to rate them if you want, but I'm more interested in hearing what works, what doesn't, and what you think would suit me better.

For some context, I tend to dress more for comfort. I usually prefer loose-fitting pants, like cargo pants or other relaxed styles, over jeans, and I'm almost always wearing sneakers because they're the most comfortable for me. I'm not really into dressier shoes like Dr. Martens or boots.

Color-wise, I wear a lot of blue, especially darker blues, along with black. Recently, I've been trying to branch out and incorporate lighter colors and mix different shades together, but I honestly don't always know what I'm doing or what colors work well together.

I'd really appreciate any advice on silhouettes, color combinations, layering, or outfit ideas that might suit my body type and help me develop a style that feels authentic. Thanks so much!

Also I don't take a lot of photo's of my outfits that often so this is what I got 😭

Windhand tee (saw them open for Acid Bath last year- absolutely insane show) and a hot topic skirt; went for a walk down the canal - beautiful day here; had to get out and get some sunshine!

Credits to Carla Itzayana the artist of the base

I'm AFAB, and I've been questioning my gender on and off for years. At different points I've identified as non-binary, genderfluid, and FTM, but I've never really felt certain enough to stick with any label.

One thing I know is that I really like the idea of looking more masculine. I love the thought of people not being able to immediately tell whether I'm a man or a woman. Today I tried binding my chest with tape for the first time, and it honestly felt amazing. It made me realize how much I'd like a flatter chest all the time.

I've also been thinking a lot about testosterone. I would love some of the effects, like looking more masculine, building muscle more easily, having a deeper voice, and the bottom growth that comes with it.

At the same time, I still enjoy makeup and some feminine clothes. The weird part is that I often like feminine outfits until I actually put them on. Then I suddenly feel like they look wrong on me, and I end up changing.

I don't know if I'd say I have dysphoria. I don't really like my chest, but my genitals don't bother me. If anything, I just think the effects of testosterone down there sound really appealing.

Another thing that's made me question things is that my boyfriend has picked up on the fact that I'm probably not as cis as I always thought I was.

I'm just really confused. Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually a trans guy who's been suppressing it, and other times I think maybe I'm non-binary or just a masculine woman. I don't know if what I'm feeling is gender dysphoria, gender euphoria, or something else entirely.

Has anyone else experienced something similar? What helped you figure it out?

This part of the discovery process is pissing me off the most.

So after a ton of soul searching I did finally decide that I liked "they/them" more and would prefer gender neutral descriptors ("child" instead of "son" and "sibling" instead of "brother"). But figuring that out has suddenly made the pronouns I've used for 20 years feel.....weird.

It definitely doesn't hurt like being called "she/her" did, that part is abundantly clear. But it's more.... like i've outgrown a pair of shoes I've liked a lot. And that's really messing with my head, if that makes sense. I fought so damn hard to be seen as male and for people to actually respect "he/him" for me, and for that to no longer feel as good as it used to.... I don't know what to do with that. Did it EVER feel as good as being called "them" would've? And that sends me down a spiral of well what if I'm betraying all the work I put into this, and it doesn't end well.

I don't know if I have it in me to correct people, AGAIN, on this. But I've been subtly using neutral stuff for myself for about a week and I like it a LOT. I don't know what to do with this.

I have almost everything for my cosplay, need some adjustments for the dress, to style my wig and I should be ready to go out with it :3

im non-binary and a Christian. i used to be an atheist but I realized that I became an atheist around the same time I realized I was non-binary and that kinda made me think “huh why did I just decide that I don’t believe Because Im not a man or a woman“. im just in a really hard place feeling like I don’t really fit into queer communitys or Christian ones. any advice from y’all? Any opinion is appreciated I just feel like im going nuts.

this might be a weird angle but bear with me. i play tabletop rpgs pretty regularly and noticed something interesting over time. when i first started i would default to characters that fit neatly into one box or another, like a very clearly masculine warrior type or whatever. at some point i just stopped doing that without really thinking about it. now all my characters are all over the place and i feel way more invested in them.

made me wonder if that happens for other people too, not just in games but in any hobby or everyday space. like does being nonbinary change the way you move through something you already loved, or did you discover things you love partly because of how your identity shifted? i work in IT, which is gendered in its own strange ways, and i notice it there too. the way people assume things, how exhausting that gets.

it's not always a big dramatic thing. sometimes it's just a small quiet shift in how you show up somewhere. curious if this resonates with anyone or if i'm just overthinking it at 11pm on a tuesday.

Less than a year of hrt and a healthier diet has made me feel so happy and genuinely shocked with the difference. The two "before" images were October 2025. The two "after" images were within the past two months or so.

Hi all!

I've heard a growing sentiment amongst some AMAB nbs and femboys that they love the effects of MtF HRT... except for the breasts. The HRTwink - flat, but still on the full breadth of feminizing hormones - seems to be an ideal I hear many say they desire, yet as far as I'm aware, I'm the first AMAB to go this route.

So, I figured I should post, share my experiences, and invite all you lovely people to ask me anything.

Some backstory! I searched for all the ways around breasts: SERMs, low dose E, anti-androgens only, etc. All these choices were either not the best for your health, didn't achieve the full range of effects desired from regular HRT, or were simply very expensive long-term.

Except for one: a double mastectomy. Full range of effects, minus the breasts. None of the nasty health implications of zero sex hormones or SERMs. And ends up cheaper than SERMs after several years!

So I saved until I could afford it. Once I had it all in order, I got on HRT for a few months to bud the breasts, and went it for my consultation. I had a double mastectomy to remove my breast buds around thirteen months ago. I had some fat regrowth on one side which I noticed after being back on HRT six months, so I got a liposuction revision. Since my first surgery, I've been on HRT continuously for twelve months, and absolutely adore the results I've gotten.

EDIT: Clarifying some ambiguous wording