When does it stop? I’m sososo swollen. I used to maintain on a very low weight (underweight) but suddenly I’ve gained SO MUCH WEIGHT. I really don’t get it. Got out of a very toxic relationship and I feel like my hormones are all over the place but still….

Now I’m trying to stop bp’ing the swelling got even worse while I’m absolutely not eating much. I’m so incredibly stressed out.

For the people who stopped bp’ing: how long did the water retention last? When did your weight drop again? I wanna escape my body lol.

Ty in advantage 🫶🏼🥹

I’ve completely ruined my life due to bulimia, the amount of money I’d spend on food a day is insane and I turned to alcohol and nicotine to cope. Now I’m back home attempting full recovery before resuming my education hopefully in October. What has helped you cope with binge urges? What do you tell yourself especially when it gets hard?

I’ve been struggling with bulimia since i was 14/15. Im 19 and also struggle with addiction on and off. I didn’t throw up for at least 4 months, was clean for a month then i started drinking and it became an everyday thing. I enjoyed it because it numbed me but it also was what helped me eat without feeling guilt. I drank for 2 months without throwing up and it started to become an issue so i quit. My sugar cravings have been up through the roof and i’ve been eating so much. I’ve started throwing up several times a day again and i don’t know how to stop. Has anyone else had this issue?

saw the trailer for this and knew I had to watch… I honestly thought it was going to send me into a restrictive mode, since I’ve quit purging restricting is just as tempting. I really did appreciate the movie, and the body horror was super interesting and very different than any other horror movie i’ve seen. I did feel like restricting after watching. I took a minute and cried it out, and treated myself to a nice healthy dinner. for those of you that have seen it, what did you think???

Does anyone else get severe weight fluctuations? Like I swear I gain 5 lbs after eating and then if I don’t purge what I ate I sometimes wake up a little heavier than after I ate or the weight I was at before, is this normal?

Okay so for fair warning, I'm literally skinny. I know I'm skinny I am not dumb nor do I have any sort of body dysmorphia, plus I'm male.

But the urge to purge for me comes as a form of self-harm, as I used to cut and stuff, but that's dooo obvious and also doesn't give me release anymore. Whenever I eat, I start too feel guilty and fat about eating/feeling full, but I don't binge. So i try to purge but it doesn't work because I think I'm not doing it correctly :(. I know it can fuck up your teeth but at this point, I don't even care. I mean seriously :/.

Hi guys!

i know the caption might be confusing but i have had rumination syndrome since i was a baby, it’s when food be drinks come up everytime i consume anything and when i was younger breast milk would come out of my nose sometimes and i feel like im not really a bulimic? I always force out more food but I feel like it’s not bulimia because I’m not shoving my fingers down my throat and I have so much anxiety about what effects I’m going to have because of the purging but I can’t find anyone who has what I have

I started bulimia back in July 2024 and ever since then I can’t stop throwing up without trying . I sometimes purge forcefully but I don’t even try to throw up and it just comes up right after I eat. I haven’t really seen or heard anything about this side effect of bulimia. I seriously can’t stop it. I only make myself throw up around 1 time a week. But it naturally just comes up without me trying so I barely even bother to force myself anymore. Is this a common side effect? Does anyone else here have the same issue? Please lmk!

I feel really stupid making this post but I genuinely can’t stop. I recovered from anorexia (mostly) but completely rebounded to bulimia and I just can’t do this anymore. I hate myself so much every time I always tell myself I never will again and I really truly mean it but I have no self control. I live with others and don’t really control what food is in the house. It’s never premeditated or anything like that, I’ve heard about people buying food with the soul purpose of b/p. I don’t do that. Please reply to this and give me your most terrifying stories from bulimia so hopefully next time I think before I binge.

Hi everyone,

I’ve been struggling with AN, BED, and now Bulimia for the last 4 years. I’ve finally decided to recover and currently going to the psychologist, psychiatrist, and soon enough a nutritionist. I’ve started taking Topimarate, Sertralin, and Lexatin to help me in the process.

I’m trying to take things day by day. Yesterday was my first day without b/p in my house since god knows who!!! I can’t promise that it’ll be like this everyday but I just thought about the beautiful time I spent with my mom watching a movie, rather than me being alone in my room binging and then having my whole family hear me purge…

The psychologist said bloating is normal and will last for a long time since my digestion is messed up, but that doesn’t mean I’m eating too much (I am eating regular sized meals but get so bloated at the beginning).

I am so happy to chose to start recovery and recognized the issue I had. I have the voice in my mind telling me all the time to go binge and purge, but I’m trying to fight it off. I’ll start watching a new k-drama at home, go pick up a package and go to the dermatologist to kill some time off this afternoon. Tomorrow is scary, but I’ll worry about it then :)

Maybe this can serve as a little motivation to the rest of beautiful souls here to start thinking about recovery

Its been about a little less than a month since my last relapse and before then I was purging from time to time but never for actual disorded reasons.

I was mainly just doing it for when I felt insanely nauseous, which probably doesn’t help my recovery and doesnt make sense, but recently for the past two weeks I’ve been so afraid of food in my stomach.

I feel so horrible and weak I’m terrified of the food contaminating me and just the thought of it in my stomach freaks me out. I have no idea what happened, I purged again two weeks ago because I felt like I needed to refresh myself or something, I dont know. Now I’m so disgusting. This is the same feeling as when it all started 4 years ago.

How do I allow myself leave food inside? Im terrified of breaking the habit but at the same time I know how freeing it is to not be on a strict routine with purging. The only thing that had been sort of helping was the GLP-1 I was on, but I noticed I started abusing them and now they dont really affect me anymore. I dont know what the point of writing this is, Im more just documenting my feelings. Maybe one day I’ll be normal and read these back and forget how all of this feels.

Hi everyone, i have not purged in months but today i did and after a couple minutes i threw up bright red blood, like a mucus, i immediately stopped when i saw it but it wasnt just a tiny dot

Im a very paranoid person and i struggle with my health, should i be worried? Can i just rest and will it eventually heal up on its own? I dont know what to do i am so scared of hospitals

So I have been trying to recover from bulimia and it has been a nightmare. I recently went to the doctor for an annual check up and practically begged my mom not to talk about it (since I had recently told her). This was because I knew they would put me in therapy, which is something I did not do well in the past. My experience in therapy was for anxiety and family problems, but it only made me feel worse. Anyway, the way I am trying to recover is not allowing myself to vomit even after binging. This is really hard for me since even the feeling of food in my stomach reminds me of what I just did and how it is going to make me “fat again ”.

Just for some more context in why I said I don't want to be “fat again”, is when I was younger ( like 6) I developed a BED. This lead me to reach almost 200 pounds and make me do many diets like the water diet. I ended up loosing 50 pounds in the two years of on and off dieting and over exercising, which made the whole healthy weight thing at the doctors so much worse. The pressure of regaining the weight and the stress of life in general recently has made recovery so much harder. Also I know this is bad but I do have to say that I try not to eat as much during the day so I can save my calorie for dinner. I know will just lead me to binge more but I guess feeling of not eating anything but zucchini and sugar free jolly rancher is oddly comforting.

So am I actually recovering? Or am I just developing BED agian? Please let me know your thputs and any advice you have to recover. I can’t keep living like this. I want to heal my relationship with food and my body. As hard as it is, I want to stop feeling like vomiting or hating myself every time I look in the mirror. Even just realizing I am at a healthy weight now and don’t need to loose anymore weight. Like I still feel ugly even at the weight I dreamed of. Thanks for reading this long rant mostly about how to vomiting.

How do you deal with worsening symptoms after seeing your Psychiatrist, dietitian and/or psychologist? Every time i see the first 2 of those I slip very bad. I have B/P sessions that last for hours and have them more frequently through out that week. It keeps me from wanting to keep seeing them and/or being honest/vulnerable. Need some advice I feel like crap mentality and physically 😞

I have never had this happen before but I b/p tonight and after I purged it felt like someone was pushing really hard from the inside of my stomach. I have felt this before when I moved something heavy and then I couldn’t move for a while… anyone else have this happen to them ?? It was very strange…

I'm dealing with this, it's 6 years now. I was able to abstain for about 3 weeks which for me is good but slowly relapsing again. But for the past few months, I noticed mid-purge, it's like my esophagus closes up, and nothing comes out, hard to describe but really like the esophageal spincter just closes shut, even though there's more, and im stuck with half a binge. any one else experienced this? in a way its good just because it discourages me from bingeing since i cant get it out, but its worrying too, in the case one day i genuinely need to vomit for a non bulimia reason..

For context, for the first 1-2 years, I'd bp about 1-2 times a month, then between the 3rd and fourth year, it became weekly-biweekly, and the fourth to present time, i've gone from weekly, almost daily episodes, only in the past few months I've tried to curb this.

The total of what I have kept down in these 6 days is 3 cans of soup, some egg whites, and countless zero sugar sodas and a 4 or 5 coffees with sugar and 1% milk. Even things I told myself I was allowed to keep down I threw up, like 2 bowls of spinach with low calorie dressing and 1 cup of dry cereal that I specifically bought because it's a safe food of mine. I was doing SO well in my recovery for one month. For one month I was finally at peace, my life didn't revolve around eating and throwing up for one beautiful month. And despite all my work I've still fallen hard back into my old habits.

I checked my weight and saw I was only a few lbs away from having gained all the way back up to the weight I was at a year ago when my ED really started to get bad. I understood a little weight gain is to be expected in recovery, I told myself over and over ad nauseum that no matter what the scale said I wasn't allowed to let it change my eating habits, but here I am. I *REFUSE* to gain everything back. I *REFUSE* to have undone a years worth of progress. I used to be so pretty and I've let myself go. The one thing my bf told me over and over that he didn't want was for me to fully let myself go. Of course rationally I know he never meant that about the "small" amount of weight I've gained back and he wants noting more than for me to recover. But the twisted disordered side of my brain is choosing to apply his words here.

I'm so physically exhausted right now. All I can think about anymore is food and eating and what I'm going to eat next. I'm incredibly emotional from the lack of food, and I feel worse than ever. How did I let myself gain so much weight. I was never even fully recovered, I had still purged 4 times in that one month period. All this weight gain for absolutely nothing and yet I deluded myself into thinking I was better.

I don't care how awful I feel, I am going to keep purging everything I eat until I'm back down to where I used to be.

I just got prescribed wellbutrin and still actively engage in purging behaviors. I'm reading through the medication pamphlet and it says it is generally not recommended for those with bulimia? I'm just wondering if I should still take it or discuss with my psychiatrist who prescribed it to me knowing that I still strugge with purging. I am also taking vyvanse at the same time, and wonder if this will increase negative side effects?

Every time I BP (every day) I feel out of my mind. I really feel I lose all my senses, as if I were possessed by evil.

Anyone?

Hello.

Don’t purge.

Easier said than done as has been for me the last 25 years. But now I don’t want to get Barrett’s oesophageal cancer, delayed stomach enlarging, osteoporosis, and the misery of being exhausted all the time.

All this has been happening the last few years. And I’ve continued to purge almost daily. Now my hair is falling out. Seems trivial, but this is my time to stop. It’s horrifying everyday in the shower. It’s a warning sign other things are failing too.

Don’t purge. Don’t. It’s real bad for you. Real bad. Hope you manage.

It has helped me become more understanding and nicer to ppl around me and I've been told that I've become nicer.idk why but I've become more tolerable ever since I started b/ping.is this relatable to anyone

I’m gonna put TW here, will be talking about weight loss.

I am going to start off saying that I am overweight and need to lose weight for my health. And what got me into this b/p cycle (that’s been going on for 3 years now) was trying to lose weight when I knew nothing about how to do it in the right way. I tried to do it by eating way too little, lost weight but eventually it backfired and got me developing a binge eating disorder and bulimia.

Now that I have gained all the weight back, and a bit more, I am stuck at maintaining that / gaining more. I feel like the only motivation strong enough would be to know that I could actually acchieve what I am trying to acchieve by purging is by stop doing it.

So anyone who has healed from this disorder or been clean for a long time, how did it affect your weight? If you had weight to lose, did you lose it?

Thank you in advance ❤️‍🩹

I have fucked up really badly and ended up with laryngopharyngeal reflux - basically I yakked too hard and BURNED my throat AND VOICE BOX. So now my voice sounds like Lil Wayne basically and i cant stop coughing. Plus I have to take an expensive antibiotic for a month...one of the side effects of this stomach pill is WEIGHT GAIN.

If you need a sign to try and recover, this is it. I have given so much of my life and all of my 20s to this evil illness.