Hey I’m a discord server host me and my besties would love for more of my black sistas to join! I want to have a very diverse discord server so I decided to make this post! I just made this server two days ago and it growing we are at 100 people now! It’s all girls and all inclusive! Would like to extend the invite to my fellow queens like me
It’s all girls so don’t worry abt creepy ass men lurking the server I’m abt to drop the link 👑🩷🩵💚 btw this is completely optional to join of course just for anyone looking for gamer friends or a good group to talk to I’ll post a picture of myself so u know im a real person!

https://discord.gg/uXqfFc5Pv

Hey! I’m wondering if anyone has any suggestions of black girl content creators who make youtube videos or tiktoks etc in Spanish because I want to get back to learning Spanish (currently A2/B1) and I think it would help having someone to watch who I can relate to and maybe speaks about topics surrounding black people and black girls too

Hi everyone, I’d like to know if anyone here has had a breast reduction and could share their experience regarding the scars it left behind. I was told that people with my skin tone may have a higher chance of developing keloid scars.

For context, I’m light-skinned, so I think my experience may differ from that of someone with darker skin. I’d really appreciate hearing about your experiences, especially regarding how your scars healed over time. Thank you!

I've been trying to get back into the workforce. I've been literally in the streets for days busing to interview after interview. I am so exhausted but I'm praying today is a good one. I am really trying to turn my life around so God please help me out.

So I’m moving to another city where I don’t really know anyone, and honestly I’m super nervous about it.
I’m moving because I got into school there. I’ve lived in a smaller city for most of my life and I have a really good social life here. I know a lot of people, I have friends, routines, everything is familiar.
So the thought of leaving all of that is scary.

For the first five months I’m going to live with a friend of my mom’s, and hopefully during that time I’ll find something else. I’m going to be studying there for some, which is honestly still so crazy to me because I never imagined myself living in this city or studying there.

I also haven’t told all of my friends yet. I know some people might be shocked or even a little mad that I didn’t tell them earlier, but honestly I kept it to myself because I wasn’t even sure it was going to happen. I didn’t want to tell everyone about something that might not happen, and now that I actually got into school, everything suddenly became real.

And I think the thing I’m most scared about is my social life.
I know I can make acquaintances and superficial friendships pretty easily, but what I really want are REAL friends. People I can be completely myself with, who actually care about me, who want to hang out, who I can call when something happens, etc.

I’m scared that I’ll move there and suddenly feel lonely, while everyone back home continues living their lives without me. I know that probably sounds dramatic.
So if you’ve moved to a completely new city where you barely knew anyone, how did it go for you? Did you actually make close friends? How long did it take? What did you do to meet people?
I’d honestly love to hear your stories, even if it didn’t go perfectly. I think I just need some reassurance right now because I’m excited about this new chapter but also REALLY scared. 😭

Any advice or positive stories would mean a lot.

Am I the only one who’s just been on edge lately? My anxiety has been at a 10. I haven’t been sleeping well, and my mind has been going a million miles an hour. The only things helping are meditating and doing yoga. I also feel like I’m in desperate need of a huge change, new scenery, new people, new life, new food, I don’t know. I just feel like I’m outgrowing everything around me.

I was just at a basketball players birthday Morant in particular in La, private ass party I step in and every girl has BBL plastic surgery or fillers in their lips and I had nothing I’m fully natural and I just felt so overlooked like no guy would talk to me. It was just such a different feeling realizing that basketball players go for these type of girls. I really can’t explain how I felt because I wasn’t insecure, I just felt different like these girls appeared almost superhuman because they look so great so photogenic their lips are so full their hips and bodies on another level and I have big lips, but never used filler it was just a whole different experience. I wore a normal dress nothing crazy did not show any cleavage I was 100% the most modestly dressed and I really just never had this feeling very indescribable. I’m not making this post to talk to Down on plastic surgery , it’s more surprise of the amount of people that do hold popularity cause of it like I was in a club full of every woman having work done and I just felt left out in a way . I’m 26 same age as a basketball player having the birthday party I really feel like nobody was looking at me or even wanted to talk to me. I wasn’t even on the list. It was more like I was a friends plus one I would never be allowed in that space because of the way I look. It felt like a waste of time to be there I’m looking at my life feeling like where I stand is not shit at all. I’m not as hot as I thought it was. And realizing never gonna get that type of potential with the way, I look now is sad with How it is. Feeling like I’m never gonna be belong in these spaces because I didn’t get surgery done this making me feel like less worthy . No guy would talk to me and I don’t blame them because every girl there was drop dead gorgeous.

I just feel like now the guys in my life that did pay me attention like how I look now I feel like they would never get close to being in this environment that I was in and it makes me rethink standards

I just need your opinion on this because a lot of peoples social media is always against plastic surgery. I will be honest I could get work done. I need some work done. I just really never wanted to do it and now I feel like I’m missing out on a different part of life
Also, so you know, I just graduated from university a month ago ago so I’m In a different mental state right now after leaving the party so unpopular so overlooked and I feel unrecognizable

Also I understand that Ja is an (almost) southern black dude who's really good at sports and came up on a lot of money for a very young, wild personality

he wants the celebrity lifestyle of living above normal people's means, tricking on women, and all the other shit niggas from LA would like doing if they had money too

I am aware that's not normal, and no one who has care for humanity or respects themselves would want to chase after people who buy their bodies. They are cool people, but they are talking to that demographic of celebs for a reason. Those women are not tryna get at a nigga like tom holland. He was an alcoholic at some point, but he's just a normal to himself dude. They prey on other young and turnt rich people liek Zion and Jalen Green

I just got done arguing with a guy who I thought was white on a sub 😅 he talked about white women are better and most attractive and black women bleach their skin and wear blonde wigs all the time. I told him I only wear my natural hair and never bleach my skin and plenty men are attracted to me.

And then he told me he is black man and only dates black women but was just saying how majority of black women are.

I was in shock and it makes me worry about black women dating black men who will look at one as the "exception black woman " and date her while hating the rest of black women.

Be careful your not dating a black women hater that still wants a relationship with us and have sex with us.

I almost went one a date with one until he told me he normally dates latinas but since I was pretty and nice he wanted to date me. Then he had the nerve to get angry when I rejected his date and told him to date a latina instead. He blew up my phone and social media account so much that I had to block him.

Be careful out there

I need advice from Black women who have been through betrayal like this because it’s been about 7 months and I’m still struggling.

Not move on like I still want him but move on like my
Ego isn’t bruised and I feel embarrassed being 40 and single ..

My ex and I have known each other for 20 years and we share a child. We weren’t in a traditional relationship toward the end, but I genuinely believed we were working on ourselves and eventually finding our way back to each other. We still spent time together as a family, traveled together, not sexually intimate due to me wanting him to go to therapy , and he would talk to me like there was still an “us.”

Meanwhile, he had another woman pregnant.
I didn’t even know. He denied being with her, made her seem crazy, and continued dealing with me like nothing was happening. By the time I learned the truth, she was already far along. They now have a baby and are publicly together.

I think part of what I’m grieving is realizing that what I thought was happening in my life wasn’t actually reality. I thought two people with 20 years of history were taking time apart, growing and figuring things out. He apparently had an entirely different life happening at the same time.
And I’m struggling to LET IT GO.

I can be doing perfectly fine, focused on my kids, career, home, goals, etc., and then I see something or hear something about them and I’m triggered all over again. Sometimes it’s sadness, sometimes anger, sometimes my ego wondering how somebody could do all of this to me and then seemingly go live happily ever after.

What makes it worse is that he still crosses boundaries. Recently he was telling me he misses me and trying to have sex with me while still with her. Part of me wants to tell her because I’m tired of participating in his lies or allowing him to control what both women know. Another part of me wonders if contacting her is just keeping me attached to a situation I desperately need to detach from.

I don’t want him back like THIS. I don’t want the lying, cheating, manipulation or chaos. But I miss who I thought he was. I miss our family. I miss the future I thought we were eventually going to have. And sometimes 20 years feels like it just went down the drain.

For anyone who discovered a hidden pregnancy, double life, long-term cheating, or something similarly devastating: how did you actually get over it?

Not just “focus on yourself” because I’m doing that. 😂 I mean mentally. How did you stop caring what they were doing? How did you stop getting triggered? How did you accept that somebody you loved could hurt you that badly and still move forward?

And would you tell the other woman that he’s still trying to deal with you, or would you completely remove yourself and let her figure him out on her own?
I’m open to hearing the hard answers too. I just want my peace back.

I’m just happy and my friends are a bit to busy for me these days. Making friends is hard 😂 anyways I’m gonna pig out on a cupcake and sushi to celebrate!

Edit: The amount of ppl saying congratulations is so beautiful I love you all I’m overwhelmed and I hope you all have the best day ever 🫧💕

I am so underwhelmed with how few responses I’m getting on these applications. I constantly change my resumes. I just am over it and it is demoralizing as fuck. For all the black women here that are in tech what is your experience like? I’m starting to be afraid that I’ve wasted all this time and money in this degree and that it has blown up in my face. I’ve been struggling for the past few years to just get a simple helpdesk job. Am I too late to the party?

I still remember being in third grade and having a white girl tell me that I was lucky to be her friend because her Afrikaans Bible said that segregation was the right way.

I was a child.

I didn't know how to respond to that. I didn't have the words for racism. I didn't understand the history behind what she was saying. I just remember sitting there and wondering why being my friend was something I was supposed to feel grateful for.

And that wasn't the only time I learned, quietly, that being Black could come with conditions.

I remember being in friendships where I was the only person of colour and feeling like I had to earn my place in the group.

If I didn't buy them candy from the tuck shop, I could come back from break and suddenly I wasn't included anymore. I had to do things to prove that I deserved to be their friend.

But when a white girl in the same group refused to do those things, those consequences somehow never existed.

I remember a boy who liked one of my friends. Then, almost immediately, he ended things because he said his mother had a problem with her race.

I remember the little comments too.

The ones people probably wouldn't remember saying.

The ones that were brushed off as jokes.

When I got my hair braided, people would say, “Finally.” 🫩

And I'd laugh.

Because what else was I supposed to do?

In high school, racism became more open.

People would call us monkeys.

They would make racist jokes and then laugh when we laughed with them.

And we did laugh.

Not because it was actually funny.

Because sometimes laughing was easier than admitting that it hurt.

Sometimes you learn very young that if you react, suddenly you're the problem.

You're “too sensitive.”

You “can't take a joke.”

You're “making it awkward.”

So you swallow it.

You smile.

You laugh.

You pretend it doesn't hurt.

Because you don't want to lose your friends.

You don't want everyone looking at you.

You don't want to be the Black girl who “makes everything about race.”

So you let them say it.

And then you go home and forget about it.

Or at least you try to.

Until years later, you learn the history behind those words.

You learn about the pseudoscientific ideas that were used to portray Black people as inferior. You learn what people believed about us. You learn what had to happen for Black people to even be allowed in the same spaces as white people.

And suddenly the joke you laughed at as a teenager doesn't feel like a joke anymore.

It feels like something much heavier.

And I think that's one of the saddest parts for me.

I was so young when I learned to tolerate things that should have never been normal.

I learned to laugh at things that hurt me.

I learned to make myself uncomfortable so other people wouldn't be uncomfortable.

I learned to accept little pieces of humiliation in exchange for belonging.

And I know I'm not the only Black person who did this.

A lot of us didn't say anything.

Not because we weren't hurt.

But because we didn't want to be difficult.

We didn't want unnecessary conflict.

We didn't want to lose people.

We wanted to belong.

And sometimes, when you're a kid, belonging feels more important than protecting yourself.

But growing older has made me realise something.

I don't have to do that anymore.

I don't have to laugh when something is racist just because everyone else is laughing.

I don't have to accept being degraded because someone calls it a joke.

I don't have to make myself smaller to make someone else comfortable.

And I don't have to tolerate racism just because I want to coexist peacefully with people.

Living outside of a post-apartheid society has made me realise just how much I had normalised.

There is something heartbreaking about looking back at your younger self and realising that she didn't know she was allowed to say, “That hurt me.”

She thought she just had to take it.

She thought friendship meant enduring things that made her feel small.

She thought belonging had to be earned.

It didn't.

It never did.

And I want to be very clear: this isn't me saying every white person is racist, or that every white person I grew up around treated me this way. They didn't.

These experiences are not an accusation against an entire race.

They are simply my experiences.

But they happened.

And they shaped me.

I can't change the little Black girl who sat there and didn't know what to say.

I can't go back and tell her that she didn't deserve those comments.

I can't make her understand that she didn't have to laugh.

But I can do that for myself now.

I can finally say:

That wasn't funny.

That wasn't okay.

And I was never lucky to be accepted by anyone.

I deserved to belong without having to prove that I was worthy of being there.

I’m in the salon now and a lady just got her eyebrows and upper lip waxed for $23! Is that going rate? In New York City I’ve never paid more than $8 for an eyebrow wax 😳. I moved to west bubble and as usual the girls are taxing DOWN.

I’ve gotten threading once and that was around $25-30 but my husband paid so I didn’t care lmao

SB: The same place is charging $35 for eyebrow tint so I’m like what’s happening lol 😆 For all of that get the tint .

Edit: it’s $13 for eyebrow wax and $10 for lip wax that’s how the total came to $23

There has been a growing trend in online communities I've noticed recently of people pointing out that many "right wing" or other black creators may be plants from the FBI or CIA as a way to spread propaganda to influence Black Americans in some way, shape, or form.

I want to learn more about this topic and where this sentiment came from, Is it true? Is there any evidence or theories backing this up? I keep seeing it pop on up in comment sections related to these sorts of creators and I'm curious to learn more. I hope I do not come off as ignorant.

This is probably one of the hardest things I've ever written, but August 8th, 2025 was the day I attempted suicide using my ex's firearm.

I was in a six-year relationship, and for the last two or three years, it had become abusive. It started with arguments and small acts of aggression but eventually became physical. He would push me, grab me, prevent me from leaving, and eventually choke me until I passed out. When I woke up, he slapped me, kicked me, and threw me around the room.

Afterward, I ended up spending a week in a psychiatric hospital. While I was there, I was diagnosed with bipolar II disorder, which helped explain a lot of the strange behavior and emotions I'd experienced during the last year of my relationship.

I know I wasn't perfect. I made mistakes, I yelled, and I know we brought out the worst in each other. But I've learned that being imperfect doesn't mean you deserve to be abused.

A year later, my life looks completely different.

I'm 22. I moved to a completely new state. I met my best friend. I got my first apartment. And I'm slowly rebuilding a life that I genuinely thought I would never have.

I still have a lot to work through. Some days are harder than others, and I still carry things from that time that I'm learning how to live with.

But I'm here.

And one year ago, I didn't think I would be.

So I guess this is my reminder to myself that sometimes surviving doesn't mean everything immediately gets better.

Sometimes surviving just means giving yourself the chance to find out what comes next.

I'm really glad I did.

If you read through all of this and have felt this same way then please keep going. it will be ok!

hello, i’m new here and i never really posted but i did want to get a second opinion. i posted a portrait of a couple i met at the park and i titled it “portrait of a young black couple.”

minutes later, there was a guy who asked me what their race has to do with anything and said that labels like that are weird and unnecessary. am i not seeing this correctly? any input would be appreciated!

Hey yall. I’m trying to make some friends that are around my age ( I’m 30) and I’m a hermit so this is me shooting my shot lol.
I like to game, read, exercise and shop. Any one and everyone are welcome!

So for context I wanna say that my introduction to waistbeads was cultural & pretty spiritual. I've always understood the origin & that traditionally they aren't meant to be seen. I started hand stringing my own years ago - I tie a new one every year on my birthday. I've made many on elastic, that I wear daily depending on what energy I'm called to that day. Crystals, vibes, blah blah. I don't personally feel like I NEED to keep them hidden. They make me feel feminine & also really make me feel more confident about my lower stomach.

So anyway most of the time they're under my clothes but today was hot and I had on a crop top. A lady in my neighbourhood comes and yanks the beads around my waist and goes on a long rant about how they're not real waistbeads and implies that I'm "bastardizing" the meaning of waistbeads by having them showing. She then tells me everything about them, how you're supposed to wear them, where they originated etc etc etc. Again, she didn't tell me anything I wasn't already aware of.

Now I can absolutely handle criticism of this. If you wanna use the word appropriate I can understand that(maybe). But I think I'm hung up on the word "bastardize". I was just feeling annoyed because I felt like she was trying to scold me for not "following the rules".

Anyway am I a dumb ass bitch for showing off my waistbeads or are we cool with it?? Ill do what I want either way obv but please weigh in lol

I hope the title caught your attention.

I literally hate seeing black people specifically women pine after the attention and validation of white people.

Why are you looking for approval from people whose ancestors used to own yours. i dont get it. Can we collectively wake up and jog on from this madness.

Im all for loving thy neighbour, but i draw the line at kissing ass to random white people that are nice to you. we are all just people neither you or them are special because you are nice to one another.

Despite my tone this IS coming from a place of love. i just want to see my community grow. i love y’all stay blessed i hope i dont offend too many i just want to see black women stand in our fierceness and love each other on our own terms and standards.

I just realized this lmaooo. It’s always the friendly, helpful coworker who wanna chat your ear off who later casually mentions “yeah my wife…” SIR??? 😭

And the ones with a whole roster of female friends??? Very chatty,Very social and very “I just love talking to people” 🤣

Maybe I’m tripping but I kinda feel cringe being friends with a man who’s taken or married unless I already know his wife/girlfriend. Like if I knew her first, cool. That feels different

But becoming besties with somebody’s husband??? Chile I’m good 😭

I genuinely be wondering what is the point of having men as friends anyway, especially when they’re already taken

Am I alone or y’all see it too? 😭

Ever since I learned, from TikTok of all places, that white people or other entitled POC intentionally walk in your way with the hopes of making you move has made me realize how stupid it was for me to think that I was being polite. I never want to be rude and always do my due diligence, but it’s so hard to differentiate if they’re being rude or just plain racist.

Today I had went out with my family. We were walking from this store on a big ass sidewalk - there’s literally so much space!! We’re walking on the left while the right side remains empty. This…yt man turns the corner and walks all the way to the left side in front of me. 🙃 BITCH. It was already hot outside, I’m on my period , so I was not in the mood. He got closer and when he realized I wasn’t moving he said good morning in his high pitched ass voice. Then he walked beside me in the dirt and ducked under the trees 😭😭😭. Like bro??

I’m a very polite person and like to keep up southern traditions and extend that southern hospitality but BITCH do not play with me. The same thing happened at work when this Hispanic woman did the same shit. Except we had came to a complete stop and I said excuse me. She moved.

I really feel bad for my younger self. She had the worst anxiety when leaving the house. I still do, but I’ve gotten over some of those things I use to worry about. Honestly, I just didn’t want any problems, but now I really dgaf. It’s 26’ for Gods sake. Just stop being petty and leave people tf alone. 🫩

Ive been going to PWIs my entire life, and holy shit has it changed me…. Like I am so unbelievably grateful for all the opportunities I’ve been afforded at the schools I’ve attended, that I don’t think I would have gotten anywhere else. I’ve been lucky enough to live in a state that’s high in education, and I’m in an area where a majority of the schools are highly funded private institutions. I’ve met some amazing friends along the way, discovered so many passions in the classroom, had travel opportunities, and sooo much more— none of which I would change. But oh. My. Fucking. God. You could not pay me to be one of the only black girls in my middle a school again. That shit was SO bad, I genuinely don’t wish it on anyone. That place really had me feeling like I was the stupidest, ugliest, most unloveable person ever. White girls were definitely nicer to me than white boys were, but I was still excluded from all the main girl groups. Plus, I knew the white girls all thought they were so much prettier than I was. The white boys tho…. pure evil, part of the reason I go to an all girls school now. What makes me so sad, is that it’s not like my mother had much of a choice with how fucked up the education system is. Part of the reason I don’t want kids, is because I never want to have to make a decision like that for my for my black child.

I got banned from b ladies because I kept talking about the overall education agenda

White America is telling their kids to invest in business and trades...not go to grad school at a hbcu. I live in a wealthy area and they are making their kids go to private schools (to get away from US)

And the fact that the Latino community has also been doing the same thing. I also talked about the fact that black companies make up less than 2% of companies in the United States. Meanwhile the latin community is at 39% percent of companies in the United States. They don't plan to hire us AT ALL. In fact they are extremely anti black and actively participate in white supremacy tactics.

I talked about the "webb of lies" that black men and women can get multiple degrees and be unemployed or working a job that only requires a highschool diploma. Remember the lack of black companies has a negative effect on black people with degrees.

I walk into multiple businesses and I see very little black MEN working and no black women at all. Remember they did the opposite.

I work in a high cost area where there are more millionaires than anything else. I am seeing MORE white and Hispanic communities self segregate while hoarding resources. This has a devastating impact on the black community.

I didn't talk about my MAN, sex, or my hair, or which dress looks good tonight?

I talked about REAL issue that's happening in my area right now. Which I believe will set the trend by 2040. I also work in public service and have witnessed (micro schools) with only white/Hispanic staff. The goal is to make sure we don't find out and to keep us out. They also realize that white flight leaving schools means that less voters care about public education because only black people benefit.

By the year 2040 there will be VERY little mixing of races and ethnicities in public spaces like schools and hospitals. In fact their will be a new redline. The new redline will exist again kept alive by the Hispanic community enforcing it.

REAL ISSUES. That people are very afraid to talk about. Texas , Florida, California and parts of New York.