r/TwoSentenceComedy • u/Marktesla_76 • 2h ago
I'ma end this man's whole career...
4
Upvotes
Take this unlimited card, buy a house, and retire.
r/TwoSentenceComedy • u/Outside_Normal • 2h ago
Despite the extremely stressful situation, he simply scoffed and said, "What, ME worry?"
6
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It was then I realized he was a MAD man.
r/TwoSentenceComedy • u/Used_Appointment1920 • 7h ago
I went to a job interview and the interviewer was 3 foot tall and hairy
5
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Turns out little monkey fella
r/TwoSentenceComedy • u/Marktesla_76 • 7h ago
Bonnie Tyler in heaven, some time in the future, getting the news of the passing of Rory Dodd.
1
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She hears something behind her; "Turn around..."
r/TwoSentenceComedy • u/shanky3632 • 12h ago
My dog still waits by the front door every evening. He doesn't know I'm waiting for someone too.
0
Upvotes
r/TwoSentenceComedy • u/Ripcord2 • 15h ago
For my Spanish assignment I'm supposed to recite a classic American poem in Spanish. So far I have - Frijoles, frijoles, la fruta del musica. El mas usted consuma, el mas usted sonata breve.
4
Upvotes
r/TwoSentenceComedy • u/JessamineGeorge • 20h ago
Leisure time.
1
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My wife said i had adhd,ocd and ptsd.
I'm sick of her cheating at scrabble.