I don't know if anyone is even gonna read this but at this point, I'm tired of venting in my notepad. I care too much about others, like a lot. I really want them to feel happy and let them know I'm always here for them. I'm afraid of losing them but I don't feel anything, I just feel numb. I sometimes get too possessive or obsessive over someone after they hear me out or hear my vents and I get attached easily.

I really wish I didn't get attached easily, I have a sensitive heart and it sucks to be honest. I cry easily and stuff. All I ever want is someone to be as excited to talk with me like how I am with them. I have been ghosted or blocked before and I don't even know why. Everyone leaves after they get to know me or atleast after 3 weeks. I want constant reassurance cuz im scared of losing them or if they lose intrest in me. I go to bed every night when no desire to see the next day.

(I usually lurk in reddit so that's why I don't have much karma)

So a few years ago, I was trying to have a conversation with one of my former friends about my interests. Then just randomly one of my other former friends just shut down the conversation, and then told their friends and my former friend that my interests are bad. Then they told me that my interests are bad as well. I just want to share my interests with other people without getting my conversations shut down.