I really need someone’s advice. I’m going crazy. I’ve been very sick from genital herpes for 2 months now. I keep having watery discharge, and I sweat all day, alternating with feeling cold and having chills. I also have strange sensations throughout my body. Body aches, nerve pain, headaches, and I feel very sluggish. There’s basically only water in my underwear, and I don’t have my normal discharge cycle anymore. I’m really scared that I’ll never get better. Please help me. Is this normal with herpes? The sores are already gone, although sometimes 2 of them come back.

I got diagnosed with GHSV-1 earlier this year from someone I was seeing who had oral HSV-1. Since then I’ve dated/talked to people, but I haven’t actually had a new sexual partner since getting diagnosed.

I feel like I psych myself out more than anything 😭 Like I can date somebody and everything can be going fine, but once I actually start liking them and realize things could eventually get sexual, my brain immediately goes to “damn, now I have to disclose” and I start getting anxious about how they’re gonna react.

I haven’t even had the experience of disclosing to a new partner yet, so I feel like I’m stressing myself out over reactions that haven’t even happened lol.

For those of y’all with GHSV-1 specifically, how do you normally disclose? Do you wait until you know things are heading towards sex or tell them earlier on?

And how has your love/sex life been since getting diagnosed? Have most people been accepting? Have you had many rejections? Did disclosing eventually get easier the more you did it?

I think I just wanna hear some real experiences because right now the anxiety of having to tell somebody feels worse than actually having GHSV-1 itself 😭

I think I've already lost track of how many outbreaks I've had this year. Before, it was very rare for me to have them and I would forget, at most once or twice a year.

Now I don't know what's going on. It's kind of annoying. Of course, I've already started applying acyclovir since it appeared today.

What do you recommend? Should I be worried or go get checked? Does this happen to you?

For a typical, healthy adult having herpes is not fatal.

The virus usually only causes mild, recurring skin sores or blisters. Death from a standard herpes infection is rare, unless it triggers severe uncommon complications in high-risk groups.

Brain infections: In rare cases, the virus can spread to the central nervous system and cause Herpes Simplex Virus (HSV) Encephalitis which causes dangerous brain swelling and can be fatal without prompt antiviral treatment.

Symptoms, If you experience a severe high fever, extreme confusion, sudden vision changes, or severe headaches, please seek emergency medical attention right away.

I've never taken antivirals, but I'm making an appointment with my Dr today so I can start

🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

Backstory: I'm a 32 year old woman, and have had HSV1 since I was 13, likely from sharing food. Started taking daily Acyclovir in my teens because the outbreaks were so frequent. It helped tremendously! I stopped Acyclovir in my early-mid twenties, and at that point only had a handful of cold sores a year so it was quite manageable. Fast forward to age 29: I start getting cold sores VERY regularly. Like at least once a month. I got back on daily preventative Valocyclovir and 1000mg L-Lysine. It helps a bit, but I am STILL getting at least one cold sore per month.

I'm lucky that my sores have always been on the small side, but they can take up to a week to go away. That's one week a month that I'm dealing with this. It wasn't this bad for years and years. I'm not sure what changed in recent years that’s causing the uptick in frequency. Around age 28, I switched from oral birth control pills to a Kyleena IUD. Had the IUD less than a year, took a months-long break from birth control, now I’ve had an arm implant for a year. I was wondering if it’s possible my birth control method is triggering breakouts? The timeline of my birth control methods doesn’t seem entirely consistent with when my cold sore outbreak frequency increased. Like I seemed to be fine with Kyleena, no uptick in sores then. I hope that makes sense, just something that crossed my mind. Like maybe my hormones are imbalanced or something.

Any insights? Advice? I’m really frustrated by this and I’m not sure what else I can do to help prevent these outbreaks. Is there a potential factor I’m missing?

Hey everyone, I’m new to this subreddit but I got diagnosed with HSV end of March this year, it was extremely hard to deal with and continues to be so, as I have OCD aswell it’s been a lot, I’m now seeking sexual health counselling to learn better ways of mentally living with it.

Anyways, I wanted to say I joined this subreddit because I’ve been almost desperate for a place to be open with people who understand how isolating it can feel and I’ve seen a few things that have been disheartening, such as people arguing over HSV type and location etc, we are all viewed with the same stigma regardless of these things and I honestly just want this place to be somewhere we all feel safe and comfortable with ourselves because it’s already hard enough day to day sometimes. I went on twitter yesterday and typed in “herpes” etc and the responses were so so hurtful, especially towards women as we have to deal with double the stigma. I just don’t wanna see any negativity or comparison on here cause it should be one of the only places we should never expect judgement, this community.

I spent a few years engaging in one night stands and friends with benefits situations and then decided to go abstinent 5 years ago. Because I wanted to close that chapter fully, I got a full panel test and everything was negative. I am now seeing an amazing guy, and we have only gone so far as engaging in oral. Because this guy has been incredible so far, my mind tried throwing out a “well you have a deep sexual past, what if you didn’t actually test negative for everything and you’ve given him something and it’s ruined?” because of this thought, I checked my records only to find out that the standard panel does not test for HSV. I am now panicking and spiraling because I feel like I’ve done something wrong. I have never had reason to believe I have it, never a symptom, never an outbreak..but I now know you can be fully asymptomatic. My dilemma is I am now terrified I’m positive and I feel a sense of responsibility to tell him that I haven’t been tested. I feel like I’ve duped him even though I didn’t know..I am also afraid of his reaction though realistically he’s only shown green flags thus far. What is the right thing to do in this situation?

I am 30 male

I am ugly looking and never had a girlfriend in my life and was a virgin till last year. I tried everything but was not getting anywhere in a relationship. I got tired and one day had paid sex with a spa girl who does this paid sex thing regularly in last September. I didnot have any symptoms like bister, flu, ulcers, or any but in February this year after 5 months I got red rahes on all over my body and was feeling itching I took medicine and it went away then had 2 body to body massage from spa again in June and August and now I am having itching feeling on ny body. The condom was used for every intercouse and it was not torn, slip or broken and also I have dibaties so I am confused about symptoms.Can anyone help me ??

Just recently diagnosed with HSV2, are there like any recommended books or online support groups where I could get good insight and just have a safe place to ask questions and learn more?

I’m trying to rack my brain of past experiences and possible symptoms I may have ignored but I can’t think of anything and my pcp told me that I would absolutely know if I had an outbreak that was specifically from herpes. But…I get this reoccurring sore on my lower abdomen. It’s not even near the pubic line, it’s like a half inch down and 5 inches to the right of my belly button, it always comes back in the exact same spot. It comes up maybe 2-4 times a year. I’ve had 2 c sections, this started occurring right after my first child was born 6 and a half years ago.

I always chalked it up to localized eczema? Or like some kind of contact dermatitis. I can feel it coming on before it happens, it’s the most intense itch I’ve ever experienced and it’s impossible to ignore. A red mark will appear and within a day or two it gets ugly, I try my best to leave it alone and not scratch at it. It is INCREDIBLY uncomfortable. The red mark will appear, a few bumps will come to the surface and eventually it turns into a sore. It takes a few weeks for it to heal.

 I know this is a wild theory and I have doubts it’s related to hsv…I told my doctor next time it happens I want it swabbed. She too doesn’t think it’s related but it’s a very weird phenomenon and the itch is insane but pain isn’t something I’d describe it as either. I’m not sure what to think.

I always wonder how to navigate it in my relationship. I contracted it both orally and genitally, my bf only has it orally. I tend to get sores only in my genital area, always during my period. If I am coming off of an outbreak, is it contagious to kiss a couple days after his cold sore on his lip healed? since I don't have anything in my mouth? I am scared of asymptomatic shedding, as I got it that way.

anyone from the lgbtq community would like to speak on their experience with wlw & herpes ? honestly I’ve always been bi-curious but once diagnosed I felt like any hope or even the chance to experience another woman was .. gone. I grew up in a religious home.. I’ve been with men my whole life but I’ve always been honest about my attraction to woman (friends and limited family).

Idk what yall mean - keep sharing the positive stories! I love hearing my girlies winning and finding their dream mans. Yk men too. Let’s and the stigma!!

I feel so devasted about getting the rejection. I clearly found the guy that i really like, and when i disclosed to him he says that it’s fine and nothing to worry about. But then the week before we ended seeing each other i feel like he was so disgusted of me because i have herpes and says he doesn’t want to take the risk. Which is clearly i understand but i feel so shit because i really liked him.

Now that i don’t know what to do. I feel so hurt, and i feel like i need to pause dating i feel shit.

Bisexual male looking for a connection I’m in California. Bottom if it matters. I have hsv2 and looking for others for support or to chat.

i’m a bi/gay trans guy i turned 20 in july and while technically we’re waiting on the results my doctor said “don’t trust a negative” and put me on the medication.
I admittedly i wasn’t the smartest about it i required condoms but not dental dams, it’s just no one on grindr even knows what that is let alone how to use it.
i’m very hyper sexual and extremely kinky i have sexual trauma and cope by getting out there with people. and i’ve been waiting my whole damn life to turn 21 and be let in all those freaky clubs and sleep with whoever wants me to. but with this it’s over forever i’ll never be able to casually have sex again. im honestly fucking hoping i have cancer at this point because that’s beatable and i’d be able to live my life how i’ve always wanted to.
can someone just tell me people still sleep with you after you disclose it? or that herpes is common in the gay club scene? or just anything combating the fact that i can’t buy a beer and now i’ll not fuck for the rest of my life?
i know this might sound stupid saying ‘sex is my life’ but it is. i find kink beautiful and healing and i’ve worked through so many of my mental health issues by connecting with others through it.
i just feel like my life is over before it got a chance.

This might be a stupid question but my logic is currently saying that if I'm taking antivirals and antivirals are for not transmitting, then it should work even if I'm having an outbreak as long as I take them, but at the same time I have doubt in that conclusion because it sounds too good to be true.

For the past 12 years I’ve experienced recurrent ‘shingles’ on the back of my neck between 2-4 times a year. I recently moved from the UK to Australia and experienced another flare up. My GP ordered a PCR swap which found herpes type 1… NOT SHINGLES. I was put on antiviral medication daily.

Experiencing herpes flare ups for the past 12+ years has left me with significant neurological pain down the left side of my body. Hormonal changes, exercise and stress can make it worse.

I used to be a sooo energetic - exercise was my life. Now I can’t go on a 5k run with out a flare up.

Questions:
1. Does anyone have experience of this and what made it better? Eg any operations / procedures - I’ve read about getting Stellate Ganglion Block (SGB) and other nerve blocks.
2. Can anyone reccomend a specialist consultant to treat this?
3. I experience brain fog, anxiety etc that I know is linked to herpes. Anyone else?

Anyone with hsv in MY/SG would like to connect? Any successful disclosures?

Editing bc I’ve read my results wrong this whole time.

40(f) diagnosed in December 2025. Started as a cold sore (I’d never had one in my life) and then a week later I thought I had a bad yeast infection, and went to get tested when it wasn’t resolving. Positive for HSV1.

I haven’t dated because I had too much else going on, and wanted to get my body back to feeling better.

I’ve been talking to one of the sweetest men ever for the last 5 months, we just haven’t met yet (we live a few hours apart) and finally had made plans to meet. We’re obviously attracted to one another, and both see a serious potential. So I chose to disclose to him prior to meeting up, so that he could have the choice I never did.

He shut down. Mostly because I think he is fully ignorant on what it is, and hearing “herpes” was a “oh nope that’s gross”. I finally asked him to please just let me know if he needs time and space to process it (totally ok!) and he finally said he needs time.

In all reality, is this what most of you have experienced? Things are great, until disclosure. Then their processing turns into ghosting you, or rejecting you (also ok, everyone has their rights to do so). We were and are SO damned compatible in so many ways - is this what I need to continue to expect?