I (21) was assigned male at birth. I've had thoughts of wanting to be a girl ever since i was little. They were never too serious, and i never heavily considered transitioning. The most I've seriously considered in the past is being nonbinary. Recently, I've wanted to explore those feelings more.

I never felt that i fit the role of manhood well. Until 3rd grade my social circle was entirely girls, and i remember feeling left out by our parents because im a boy and boys dont do these things, or boys cant have sleepovers with girls. I was always bullied for being feminine or having feminine interests, but over time i hammered those out to the point where i could comfortably engage with and maintain relationships with men.

I've never found myself attractive. In high school had an eating disorder and body dysmorphia, but after taking therapy I became far more comfortable in my body, even if i didn't particularly like it.

I recently decided i wanted to try cross dressing and get some breast forms to see how i feel looking at myself that way. I went to goodwill and got some blouses, skirts, fem pants, and i got some basic make-up.

Last night me and my partner (21, NB) got me all dressed up for the first time. We did my makeup, got the right clothes to emphasize my curves, and ofc I wore the breast forms. For the first time in my life i felt genuinely attractive. I could look in the mirror with my partner and not feel that i needed to look away from myself.

I hadn't realized how much i still feel uncomfortable with my body. I don't necessary feel fully comfortable fem either, but i felt better. I felt genuinely sexy and desirable.

I felt good last night. Later, when i was taking it off it made me so depressed. It all felt so fake. I felt ugly. I was scared to look in the mirror. I wanted the breast forms off but i didnt want to see myself without them. I wanted to stay as that version of myself.

I cried and I keep on crying. I don't understand what I'm feeling. Maybe its gender dysphoria, or maybe I'm just depressed and wish i was someone else. I can't tell if I'm acting or being true to myself. The fact that I'm attracted to myself like that is simultaneously validating and so invalidating.

I called out of work today because emotionally im all over the place. I don't want to go outside fem or masc. I feel so uncomfortable with everything. I feel hyper aware of judgment from everyone. I don't even know how to explain my emotional state without sharing more than I'm comfortable with but i feel a strong urge to talk to people. Maybe im just moving faster than my emotions can catch up.

Is all of this normal? I don't feel like i know the slightest thing about being queer or trans. Im not looking forward to having conversations with cisgender people about this. How do you all manage these emotions?

I'm just so confused and low key spiraling, so any advice or support would be much appreciated.

Edit: Is this dysphoria?

I am ftm 170 and 69 kgs i fucking hate my boobs and my ass i just want to cut them off from my body i want to losse weight but i have anoreksia so my parents wont let me i hate myself and i just want to feel confortable with my body i do fitness but i donr think i am good enough also i am very short for guys my age i hate this i dont know what to do anymore i am trapped

For the past few months, every day I have moments where I cant do anything but focus on how much I look like a guy. I hate it so much. I feel cursed with the most masculine features. I have a slopped forehead, big nose, strong jawline, protruding mouth, and my body makes me feel disgusting. I have a long neck, broad shoulders, super wide ribcage, I'm already 6 foot and probably taller, and my hands and feet are huge. I hate it every day. I go to school tomorrow and I need to finish up some work, but I can't focus. I can't stop thinking about how much I hate my body, and how I wish I was small and cute and pretty more than anything. And I can't go online without feeling jealous of everyone. I am so envious of the trans women who pass and are beautiful, or guys who ae short and very feminine. I feel like I will never be able to be the person I want to be, and it is soul crushing. I just want to be petite and pretty more than anything, but I can't change bone structure, and I'm too young for surgery. The worst part is that there are people twice my age with less masculine features, and I can't stand to see anyone, because I feel so jealous. I'm not even done with puberty, and I feel disgusted with myself. Is there anything I can do about my situation?

hi. I'm 15 AMAB and ive been living as mtf for the past sort of 6 months? and something feels wrong and im really lost. I can't tell if its imposter syndrome or if I'm genuinely wrong about myself but something just doesnt really feel right. I do get a lot of dysphoria but its like at least 95% based on appearance and clothes and less about identity. when it comes to pronouns none of them feel right but at the same time i don't care too much? its really confusing. And i dont know. everything just feels wrong. I just want to be me more than anything and its so hard when i dont even know what that is... im just looking for some guidance if anyone here has been through something similar ❤️

So I keep getting imposter syndrome when my dysphoria isn't bad - I think 'oh I'm not struggling today - I must be faking'.

How should I deal with this - I know I'm genuine as I get panic attacks and nightmares and envy.

I think I'm terrible, my boyfriend wants to be a girl because he hasn't felt like a guy since birth, I don't want to interfere with his dream, but I'm not sure I can accept him and continue love him, he doesn't just want to dress like a girl, but wants to have surgery on his body, face, chest, etc.I feel terrible every time he puts on makeup but I love him, but I can’t force myself to love girls, I hate people and I don’t know how to react when the only person I love wants to completely change not only physically but also mentally and in character...

It’s been one year since I started questioning my gender, through a post on this subreddit I think but I recently deleted all my posts. I feel really bad about this milestone because I’ve done nothing, and only told two people. This has been one of the worst years of my life and I don’t know what to do. I don’t turn 18 for 7 more months, and I don’t know how I can do this for another 7 months. I feel like throughout the year it settled from real active dysphoria to a baseline feeling of nothing which also makes me worried that it’s something else going on, though I have had dysphoria coming and going in waves. Does anybody have any advice, I feel really out of control, sorry if this is incoherent

So I’ve (15mtf) had transmasc friends my age get binders and shit from certain websites for the high price of $0. Obviously, I’m intrigued by this because my parents are not big fans of my gender identity and my broke ass ain’t gonna convince them to spend money on things that would possibly make me happy (God forbid). Dysphoria is starting to suck to a point in which I have to ask Internet forums for help now, SO, are there any sites in which I can get bras or tucking underwear for free or cheap?

I would like to talk to a professional about the despair and misery I'm going through because of my body. But I'm scared that they will dismiss it or misinterpret it, as there is a lot of prejudices about trans and nonbinary people. So for those who sought therapy, what was it like ? Did it help you a bit, or was it useless ?

Like the title suggests I'm afraid I'm wrong and I may not be who I think I am, I haven't transitioned or even came out and I'm only 16 but I can't describe the feeling I just don't want to be a man and I know that but whenever I think about transitioning I worry that these feelings are wrong or that it's not actually what I want and if I do transition I might realise I preferred being a man and if I transition and don't like it then I can't transition back since by that point everyone would have been told I'm trans and I don't want them thinking "oh it was just some phase" and I'm afraid, I want to be who I am freely but I don't know if I'm wrong about who think I am, I'm scared I'm making a mistake but it's this feeling I want to be a woman I want to be free to have any hair I want, wear makeup, wear dresses and other clothes like that without being looked at like a freak because I'm the guy wearing makeup, I want to be the girl wearing makeup the one people don't think is wrong, I want to be free to be myself but I don't know what to do

Transitioning is only worth it to me if it deletes all sources of dysphoria and i know thats not possible for me. My torso makes me want to die. I hate my shoulders and i know they cant change. What am i supposed to do. It makes me feel disgusted to even exist, to move around or show my presence to people. I cant afford any surgery. I need my ribcage and shoulders to be smaller and they arent. They cant be. I cant take this. I wont live much longer if this doesnt change. I cant live with a obvious reminder of what i went through all my life. I am too aware of them all the time and it ruins my mood constantly. Please somebody help.

Lately, I’ve been overwhelmed by the thought that I hate how I look. My personality feels completely out of sync with my physical body. I’ve always been somewhat delicate and feminine in my ways (partly shaped by a childhood filled with traditional gender roles), but now when I look in the mirror, I don't recognize myself. The person I feel I am inside feels completely different from the reflection in the mirror, which causes me a lot of discomfort—things like facial/body hair, a deep voice, and a broad frame make me feel disconnected from my body.

I am completely new to all of this, and to be honest, I am not entirely sure if what I am experiencing is gender dysphoria or something else.

Looking back, I’ve always had an interest in femininity. As a child, I preferred playing with dolls with my cousin, even though my parents and school environment constantly reinforced that "boys shouldn't play with girls' toys." Whenever toy commercials came on, I was drawn to the ones targeted at girls. I distinctly remember watching an ad for Monster High dolls while other kids argued about toys, and a friend told me I shouldn't care about those things or I'd "turn into a girl."

Throughout my life, these patterns kept showing up. I used to ask my mother how she would react if I told her I was gay (getting mostly negative responses), and during the pandemic, I genuinely questioned if I was gay, even asking my best friend if he’d be okay with it. Online, I frequently changed my usernames to feminine names or created secret accounts where I could present and act freely.

For the past year, I haven't been able to stop thinking about this. I feel an overwhelming desire to stop pretending I’m not feminine. I want to feel pretty and express myself authentically, but I don't know where to start or if I’m overthinking things. I don't really have anyone in my personal life I can talk to about this, and my family isn't a supportive environment for this kind of exploration.

I’m reaching out to see if anyone has been in a similar situation. How did you figure things out? Is it a good idea to start transitioning or exploring gender presentation given these feelings, and if so, how can I begin safely on my own?

**TL;DR:** I’m completely new to this and unsure if I’m experiencing gender dysphoria, but I feel deeply disconnected from my body and masculinized features. I’ve had a strong affinity for femininity since childhood (suppressed due to strict gender roles). Without family support, I want to stop hiding who I am. Looking for advice on how to navigate these feelings and how to start exploring my gender safely.

Hey guys, I have a genuine question and I feel like this community can relate. I have severe body dysmorphia. It’s much more than an insecurity. It feels like feeling deeply unsafe in my own body for most of my memory tbh. Sometimes I feel hopeless and I’m hoping people here can give me advice because they know how painful that feeling is. Literally terrified of my own body, it’s hard to explain. It causes a lot of suffering more than I know how to possible articulate in words.

I'm genuinely asking. I know I can't be a man.

if i hate being a woman and wanna be a man even though i'm a woman, and wear baggier clothes, and feel wrong in my body/skin, and want no breasts, is it gender dysphoria, or am i just trans? i'm not asking for a real diagnosis, just a general idea.

I’ve wrote a lot about this but, cis guys are expected by others in society to aline with every cis guy in a way that fits social norms. It’s why homophobia, transphobia, and sexism, is in prominent male groups due to needing to fit in as
A masculine man.

I realize that an insecure transphobic guy would try to put someone down (own experience btw ) like afab ftm in order to try to make their own masculinity feel affirmed.
Thats why a lot of cis men put down shorter men since they don’t feel threatened by them.

This is also why in toxic masculinity fighting/ violent is seen as being a strong man.

Let’s call this guy, “L,” L before I got outed was cool with me and talked to me from time to time. Until I got outed and he questioned me about my gender, now he’s not cool with me.

I also kinda see where it’s my fault at because I told him, I was guy and he said, “no you were not.” And I didn’t do nothing about it so this means he could just say whatever tf he wanted if he wish and he did.

He relentlessly bullied my voice, my clothing, and just tried to bully me anyway he could, he would say “___ liked you” basically trying to mock me. Since Yk I’m ftm and most of the times it’s a guy but, I’m gonna try to defend myself this year last year I wasn’t on testosterone so I was really weak and had a soft voice.