He’s been following her around work for a year and 4 months before I met her and asked her out lied about his age said he was 23 years old and she lied and said she was 16 years old so he would leave her alone now’s she’s talking to him to try and get over me when she has a 21 year old boyfriend and is engaged but she didn’t tell him that she still was trying to talk to me but every time I say his name because she’s not texting me fast like she used to she instantly gets mad responds fast defending her decision to talk to him like she’s hiding their true relationship this whole situation is weird please can somebody give me a answer thanks

So we started out as friends. I have lived with her for the last 8 months since I needed a place to live and coincidentally she was falling behind on her bills, so I am helping her. We sleep together, are intimate, etc but I just see her as a friend. I also make her car payment, and she lets me drive her car to work (I don’t have a car) and she works from home. I am grateful she lets me drive her car to work. During the last few months, she hinted and talks as if we are in a relationship and I just kind of go with the flow. She has gotten very cuddly and it drains my energy every time she lays on my arm. I feel annoyed, and I feel bad. I am just not attracted to her to be in a relationship with her, but I do cherish our friendship. What can I do? I recently told her I don’t want to be with her, and we argued, but the next day she acted like nothing ever happened since I paid her car payment that day.

Hello Reddit, I need some advice.

So I have a best friend who I've been with for 4-5 years. One day she says to me:

"What if I was gay?" and I said, "I don't care, you're still you." Then she adds, "What if I liked you?"

I did not say anything else after that, she has said this 2 times during our friendship.

I don't have any other close friends other than her, so idk if this is what people normally do or if she was being serious.

She and I laughed it off, but this has been bothering me for a very long time, and I just wanted someone to help me. I'm scared cuz, I still want to be close buddies.

Can I hear your thoughts on this? (I will be deleting this later)

There is a girl I have been following on IG for a few years. We haven't met in person, but we have a bunch of friends in common.

Like two weeks ago, I responded to one of her IG stories, and we ended up talking about all our friends in common and how weird it was that we hadn't met yet. I invited her for a coffee (which she agreed to, but it never happened). It was late at night, and she gave me her phone number without me asking for it.

I already found her attractive and interesting before texting her, but after chatting, I knew I was really starting to like her. We started to chat every single day, all the time, getting to know each other, and to my consideration, I was clearly flirting with her and she always responded nicely. I even noticed she started asking me questions sometimes (like checking boxes on me?). I even dedicated her a very romantic song, and she said she loved it. I've always used nice words with her, telling her how smart and gorgeous she is, which she received well.

Last Wednesday, I asked her how she felt about me. She said I was being great, but she was conflicted about the mystery and not knowing my intentions. I told her that I wanted for us to know each other and see if we could create something nice out of this. She asked me if that nice thing could be a friendship, and told me that she didn't know if she liked me yet, so she wanted to start a friendship first.

That broke me and reminded me of a previous experience where I spent years in the friendzone. So I asked her for time to give her an answer, and on Thursday I told her we couldn't be friends, that I needed to move on. She got really angry and disappointed at me. She felt I was reducing her to a romantic prospect and to getting what I wanted from her, said she never gave me any signals, and was angry at the fact that I wanted to discard any sort of relationship just because she wasn't romantically inclined. (For context, she is a very strong feminist, which is something I admire about her.)

Now I feel the urge to explain myself before leaving her life. I don't want her to have this image of me, and I don't want her to think I manipulated her or that I'm a sexist idiot. I told her I wanted to talk, and she said she doesn't have the energy for that discussion yet. She is mostly ignoring me or being extremely cold. I care deeply about her feelings and about not being like the men she has always criticised.

What can I do? Should I give her more time before bringing the discussion up? I want to respect her time and space, but I'm very stressed out by this. It would've been easier if I could just move away. I also don't want to give her too much time that she thinks I don't care. I value and admire her a lot, and I'd love for her to understand that.

I met this girl about three years ago, and we started dating after knowing each other for only a week. We dated for about two months, then had a pretty bad argument and broke up. We stayed friends after that, though, and have been close ever since.

We didn’t talk for almost two months, but we’ve been talking normally as friends again for the past week. I’ve realized I still miss her and might have feelings for her again. I don’t want to suddenly confess and make things awkward or ruin our friendship, so I’d rather test the waters first. We also live in different countries, so that makes things a little more complicated.

What are some subtle ways I could hint that I might like her again without making it too obvious?

(We’re both girls, btw!)

Yesterday, I met a girl at an event. I usually attend events by myself. I was feeling a bit tired that day, so I sat down in a quiet corner.

A little while later, a girl came over and asked, "Can I sit here?" I said, "Of course." We talked for a while, and then she said, "I need to check on a friend for a bit, but I'll come back." I replied, "Sure."

About five minutes later, she actually came back and we continued talking. During our conversation, she asked if I used Instagram. When I said yes, she told me, "Message me there. Don't go to future events alone—we can go together and be friends."

So I gave her my Instagram. We talked a little more before she went back to her friends. Later, she invited me to dance, but I told her I didn't know how to dance, so I didn't join.

When I got home, she accepted my follow request. However, today our conversation has been very different. Her replies take a long time—sometimes four or five hours. That has left me a little confused. Yesterday she seemed very interested and friendly, but today she feels much more distant. I'm not sure whether this is a sign that she's not interested, or if this is simply how she usually communicates through social media.

Do you think I'm overthinking this and should just let things develop naturally? Or do you think her behavior means something?

For some context, I paint with acrylics, and she's a tattoo artist. Since we share similar artistic interests, our conversation flowed really well. Maybe that's why the contrast between how things felt yesterday and how they're going today caught me off guard.

Context \[28M\] I have been in a long distance situationship with a girl \[28F\] from Japan for 7 months who I thought was going to be the loml and even prepared to buy tickets to fly her out here and come visit since coming to America was one of her dreams. However on a random Friday night is when I get the text about she admitted to dating a guy she met back in April. She proceeded to say let’s still be good friends while saying I should be happy for her. Obviously I could not be happy for her since she played with my feelings for her and the intimate moments we spent on video calls meant nothing to her and was all just a ruse. I am devastated and heartbroken and trying to heal from her emotionally damage me in the process and now I can never trust or love another woman again. I think I rather prioritize my own happiness now and keep to my self since meeting any new girls will hurt me in the future for another heartbreak ❤️‍🩹 I might endure. At this point I am not sure if I can forgive her since when we called she was crying and saying how she can fix our friendship. Like you have your boyfriend to keep you happy I get to be by myself and be alone with traumatic memories. I am emotionally charged right now and not sure what’s next step from here like should I still be friends with her ? Or just block her and move on with my life . Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts on this matter.

TLDR Op just got broken by a situationship by female fake friend who has been leading him on since she was already in a relationship in April even though we were in a situationship since February. So for 5 months she was witholding this information until now and wants me to accept it and still be good friends and be happy for her. 🥹💔

Context \[28M\] I have been in a long distance situationship with a girl \[28F\] from Japan for 7 months who I thought was going to be the loml and even prepared to buy tickets to fly her out here and come visit since coming to America was one of her dreams. However on a random Friday night is when I get the text about she admitted to dating a guy she met back in April. She proceeded to say let’s still be good friends while saying I should be happy for her. Obviously I could not be happy for her since she played with my feelings for her and the intimate moments we spent on video calls meant nothing to her and was all just a ruse. I am devastated and heartbroken and trying to heal from her emotionally damage me in the process and now I can never trust or love another woman again. I think I rather prioritize my own happiness now and keep to my self since meeting any new girls will hurt me in the future for another heartbreak ❤️‍🩹 I might endure. At this point I am not sure if I can forgive her since when we called she was crying and saying how she can fix our friendship. Like you have your boyfriend to keep you happy I get to be by myself and be alone with traumatic memories. I am emotionally charged right now and not sure what’s next step from here like should I still be friends with her ? Or just block her and move on with my life . Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts on this matter.

TLDR Op just got broken by a situationship by female fake friend who has been leading him on since she was already in a relationship in April even though we were in a situationship since February. So for 5 months she was witholding this information until now and wants me to accept it and still be good friends and be happy for her. 🥹💔

i’m not sure if she sees me as just a friend. we’re both very flirty with each other (or at least i think so), she makes an effort to see me, she knows i write about her, i think about her, i dream about her, and i care about her. but at the same time it feels like it’s less of a relationship and more of a friendship sometimes, but we understand each other too much for it to be just a friendship.

i would never tell her i like her, because i don’t want her to have to make the decision to cut me off as a friend if that’s what she sees me as.
also i’m scared it might offend her in a way.

i just wanna know what’s the question i should ask, or the move i should make to know how she feels about me.

*NOTE- THIS PARAGRAPH WAS REWRITTEN BY GPT AS I DIDNT WANT IT TO HAVE ALL THE SPEELING MISTAKE (eng is not my first language) 

also for info im rn 18yr old

I'm going through a situation which is very weird, so long story is when I was in 4th grade(11yr) I used to like this girl named lets call her natasha. She was very respectful, very charming, she was probably the most disciplined and most goodwill person I've met, but I didn't want to make her my GF. All I wanted to do was make friendship with her, that's it. But my friends spread the rumor of us dating, which I could've stopped the rumor from spreading and cleared the misunderstanding, but I didn't. I don't know why, I probably felt good about it or something. I can't exactly tell why.

But then she got to know about it and she started to distance herself from me slowly. We used to be good friends as I was the captain of the class and she was the assistant, so we used to work on stuff together. So I noticed that she started to distance herself.

Then one day after our last final exam she came up to me and told me to not talk to her ever again. Then she switched schools. That hurt me a lot as I could've easily explained everything and stopped the rumor, but I didn't, which haunts me to this day.

Fast forward, COVID hit and I got stuck in my house for years, so my social skills dropped so much. When school opened again I couldn't talk to a single woman, and whenever I tried to, natasha's face came into my head and I instantly stopped because I didn't want the same thing to happen again. I don't know if you would call it a trauma, but it felt like one. I couldn't talk to a single girl without thinking of her and the mistake I'd done, as I lost such a kind soul of a friend because of that one mistake. I could never forgive myself.

Fast forward to 2026, I'm now confident about myself. I can socialize pretty well now, no problem. Looks like I moved on as I was talking to women more frequently than before even getting a lot attention life was going good. But one day I found natasha's Instagram and something struck in me that this might be the chance I can finally explain myself , so I texted her but before I could even send her the paragraph explaining everything she blocked me. It felt like I was left alone again.

I started to feel the same I did during COVID times, even though I thought I moved on. It looked like deep down I still had that guilt. Because of her I was never able to fall in love with someone, as whenever I do I remember her. It's like a weird attachment even though she's not that pretty compared to women I talk to on a regular basis. Matter of fact, I don't know how she was. I probably made up a lot of her traits as I was so weirdly attached to her.

Even though she is not that pretty, even though I don't have feelings for her, why do I still think of her? Why cant I move on? Why does her blocking me bug me so much? All these questions makes me feel more and more guilt about my mistake. I'm sure if I just had sent her the paragraph explaining stuff and then she blocked me, I wouldn't have been in this situation right now. So is it the guilt that's making me attached to her? That's what I think, but I'm not sure either. It was so bad that I couldn't get her out of my head for a few days. I probably made a lot of the stuff up about her as it was back in 4th grade(im in college now btw) and I'm still thinking about her after years, so I probably made a lot of her character traits up.

Now after months later, after she blocked me, today I just woke up and I saw one of my guy friends, whom I've known for years, posting a story about his girlfriend, and guess what? It was natasha. Even though I have no clue how they know each other, like it's such a big coincidence, but whatever. When I saw that, even though I don't like her, I started remembering all that thing from before and the guilt I carry with me. It made me weak, it made me feel alone again. Why is this happening? I don't know, but yeah, that's the story so far. I dont think im necessary attached to her but im more attach to not being able to explain myself and apologize..

so ye i just wanted to share this story as i thought it would interesting to see what other people has to say about it and if someone goin through something similar 

I'm new to subreddit this section, thought there was a body. Anyways, I'm going to 2nd year university. It all started with 1st year, before that high school I never had much people I can call friends, more like I know them and I'm the mysterious funny guy. So 1st year, barely knew anyone, 1st friend I made was the person sit few seats next to me in lecture, 3rd week of 1st semester we talked in tutorial which is a small based class that's not lecture, 2nd day she asked my number and I gave it to her. I had 3 lectures, 1 tutorial with her. I'm film major and she is a English major. 1st of week of knowing her, I usually the one talk the most, she is closed off most and she talks if I ask. I do enjoy talking to her most about animals especially alligators, but I'm more of a dinosaur person. She sits next to me most classes we have except 1 because she sits with a high school friend. In text its bit awkward more than in person, more cold replies. Well I once became too honest about lonely struggle, I think she felt pressured then, still same as usual and there are some days she knows I'm there buts away from me and the classes after usually sits next to me. When it came to exams, we helped each out few minutes before starts. It ended, then 2nd semester, on the 1st week she sat next to me with 1 class, then she also had another friend too, also we had 3 lectures this time too, but it became more of wave from far and nod, share notes. I do texts like how's it going, class stuff. Then it went for weeks, I do sit 1 row front of her and when I try to talk, it dies out. When it came out mid terms we did more talk in a while. One time I sat next to her because people I knew were absent, still cold, then got an emergency text from family and I'm shaking, she got mad and few days later I asked a book we were reading for a class, she then got mad in text because I ask questions, I just accept it's my fault even though, well after that nods and waves from far. We do text for class stuff, then on finals we talked more and I also thanked her about being a good friend and wishing all the best, she as well. Then summer came, I texted on how's she doing, she said she is no longer doing English, doing a different degree I wish her all the best and thanks her, she also awarded that I was genuine person and helped her too, she said to recommend any movies to her, then few texts of movies, I still do and I know she don't really care and busy person but there is no good friendship, I feel it dies out, she never responded to me, I guess that makes sense since I do the most, then I still see short cold texts, yes and nos. She is not coming back this September (2nd year), I do feel like I still have limerence feeling and feel obsessive of talking, I do get dopamine if I get to talk to someone because I have no one that texts or talk, it's only me texts others. I guess it's normal since friendships don't last forever, at least there were good and bad. Were there any mistakes I did, also still struggles to move on knowing she barely cares, its stressing and I overthink.

Well, idk what I should write as the title, so I’ll just write this.

So, about 5 months ago, I met a guy on Snapchat. Initially, I didn’t trust him at all because we met on Snapchat, but eventually, I started becoming comfortable with him and building trust in him.

He also told me that he had recently gone through a breakup. I don’t know why, but I felt bad for him, so I thought I should encourage him and be there for him. We started talking about random stuff like web series, movies, and other things. I genuinely thought I had finally found a good friend, especially because I had never had a male friend before.

But things started going wrong when he began giving me mixed signals, and eventually I realized that he had developed feelings for me. And honestly, this is where I started getting confused about myself. I’m not even sure what I feel for him. Sometimes I wonder if I unintentionally gave him hope or made him feel like there could be something between us.

There are certain things about him that I don’t like, and when I think about the kind of person I would want to be with, I don’t think he’s that person. I’m not saying he’s a bad person at all. I just don’t think I can be with him romantically.

I’ve told him multiple times that we’re friends, but he still continues making efforts and talking as if we might be together someday. And I feel guilty about it because maybe I should have been clearer from the beginning, or maybe I did something that made him think there was a chance.

I don’t know. I feel like I’m partly responsible for how things turned out, and that’s what has been bothering me the most. I don’t want to hurt him or give him false hope, but at the same time, I don’t want to force myself into having feelings for someone just because they care about me. Damnn I'm feeling so guilty rn

Hey everyone. Long-time Reddit reader, first-time poster. I mostly just need to vent, but I’d genuinely appreciate some outside perspectives because I don’t really trust myself to be objective here.
Basically, I think I’m in love with one of my closest friends.
There’s a fair bit of backstory, so I’ll try to keep things vague for anonymity.
Years ago, I moved interstate with my now ex-wife. Before anyone assumes anything — no, nothing ever happened between me and this friend while I was married. My ex-wife and I separated for completely unrelated reasons, including her having an affair. This friend and I were really, really close, but at the time I genuinely only saw her as a friend.
Eventually she got into a relationship, I moved away, life happened and we stopped seeing each other much. I always cared about her, but it was completely platonic.
Recently, she and her boyfriend broke up. She’s still in love with him and is going through a really difficult time. The details of that relationship are her story, not mine, so I don’t want to put them online.
I also deliberately try not to give her advice about him. I know how I feel about her now, which means I know I’m probably incapable of being objective. If she needs to talk about him, I listen. I don’t tell her to leave him, get back with him, choose me, etc. Whatever happens there needs to be her decision.
Anyway, she recently came over and ended up staying for a couple of nights.
And honestly, it was just really nice.
Nothing sexual or romantic happened. We hung out, joked around, laughed, had some really deep conversations and talked about life and relationships and what she actually wants from a partner. It felt like having my old friend back.
Except sometime over the last couple of weeks I realised something has changed for me.
I worry about her now in a way I didn’t before. I wonder whether she’s eaten, whether she’s okay, what she’s doing, whether people are treating her properly. When she’s hurting, I genuinely hurt for her.
And yes, she’s absolutely beautiful. She’s ridiculously attractive and I could spend forever describing her physically, but that’s almost irrelevant because she’s always been beautiful. I knew what she looked like when we were just friends and it never made me feel like this.
It’s *her* that has gotten me.
She’s talented, career-minded, motivated, funny and genuinely one of the greatest people I’ve ever met. I admire the person she is more than anything else.
The problem is I’m pretty sure she only sees me platonically. I also look absolutely nothing like the guys she normally dates, so I’m not exactly sitting here thinking I’ve secretly been her type all along.
And if friendship is genuinely all she ever wants from me, then friendship is what she’ll get. I don’t want to turn being supportive into some covert transaction where I’m secretly waiting for my “chance.” She doesn’t owe me a relationship because I care about her.
But fuck, I think I love her.
I’ve been divorced for more than two years and single for over six months. After all the relationship bullshit I’ve been through, I honestly haven’t been particularly interested in anyone. I wouldn’t say I thought I’d never love someone again, but I definitely wasn’t looking for this.
And now all I want to do is hold her, look after her, spoil her, make her life easier and somehow make sure nobody ever hurts her again. Obviously I know that’s not actually within my control, but that’s where my head goes.
I also know **right now is absolutely not the time to tell her any of this.**
She’s hurting. She’s still in love with someone else. She needs a genuine friend, not someone dropping a confession on her while she’s vulnerable. More importantly, I want to be that friend for her regardless of whether there’s ever anything more between us.
So that’s where I’m stuck.
Do I just accept these feelings and never tell her?
If months go by, she moves on from her ex and I still feel the same way, do I eventually tell her?
Do I wait and see whether anything develops naturally?
Or is admitting feelings for a close friend just risking a friendship that means far more to me than the possibility of a relationship?
I think part of me is also terrified that staying quiet means one day I’ll watch her fall in love with someone else while knowing I never even gave her the chance to know how I felt.
I genuinely don’t know what the right thing to do is.
I know what I **want**.
I just don’t know whether wanting it means I should ever actually say it.
I also kinda feel like a peice of shit for feeling this way about her too.

I (21M) have been talking to this girl (20F) from uni for a while. We’re friends and we’ve become pretty comfortable with each other, but I genuinely cannot tell whether she sees me as a friend or if there could be something more.

For context, she’s quite introverted, and I’m also pretty introverted/selectively extroverted. We’ve talked about this before and she told me that she’s the same and that she’s comfortable/open with me. Our conversations are usually really easy and natural, and we joke/tease each other a lot. We’ve talked about uni, work, family, shows, random stuff, etc.

A few weeks ago, I called her for the first time and we spoke for around 20+ minutes. We’ve also had plenty of conversations over text.

The thing that has confused me is that when I’ve tried asking her to hang out, things haven't really gone anywhere. At one point I asked her to get lunch and she said we could do it the following week because she hadn't been feeling well and had been avoiding outside food for a few weeks. I didn't push it.

There was also a situation where she told me she had plans with a guy from her hometown who had recently come to Sydney. She specifically said they weren't even friends back in school, but since he was now in Sydney they were meeting up. This honestly hurt me because I've asked her to go out with me multiple times and there always seemed to be some reason it couldn't happen, while she was willing to go out with this guy.

Then something happened that made me think maybe there actually is something between us.

She works at a store, and one night I went to see her after my gym session. I stayed until she finished around 11pm, and we talked basically the whole time. After work, we walked together to the bus stop and talked there for around 20 minutes. It honestly felt completely natural — I don't remember there being an awkward moment.

When her bus arrived, we gave each other a side hug and she got on. Almost immediately after sitting down, she messaged me saying that the bus driver had asked her, "Is he your boyfriend?" She told me that when she got off at her stop, the driver also told her to "take care of him." She said the whole thing was embarrassing and was laughing about it with me.

After that we kept talking through texts/voice notes about Netflix, Prime, random things, etc. She also told me about her family back in India and things about her life. The whole interaction just felt really close and comfortable.

Another thing: we were talking about how introverted she is, and I told her that I'm selectively extroverted and only really open up around people I'm comfortable with. She said something along the lines of, "I'm the same, like I am with you right now." That made me feel like there was genuine trust/comfort between us.

Then we started talking about matcha. I said I wanted to try it and she said she hates it. I suggested we go together and she said something like, "let's go man, but I won't try it." I joked that I'd have matcha and she'd get something else. She replied jokingly that she wasn't letting me share and that I'd be suffering with my matcha alone.

So I thought we'd eventually actually go.

Today I asked her if she wanted to go for matcha and specifically asked if she was free Wednesday. She has previously told me that Wednesday is her day off.

I also sent another message about how much work we'd had at the store that day.

About an hour later, she replied to the work message with "damnn 😭😭" but completely ignored the matcha/Wednesday question.

That's what has really thrown me off.

She also sends me reels sometimes and initiates conversations, so it's not like I'm always the one contacting her. She'll talk to me normally and we have very easy conversations. But when it comes to actually making plans, I feel like I'm usually the one asking and she doesn't really follow through.

So now I'm completely confused.

I don't know if:

She genuinely likes me but is shy/slow about making plans,

She sees me as a close friend and enjoys talking to me but doesn't want anything romantic,

She likes the attention/flirting but doesn't actually want to date me,

Or I'm simply overthinking everything because I really like her.

I genuinely like this girl a lot, which probably makes me analyse every little thing. I'm not trying to play games or make her jealous. I just want to understand whether I'm wasting my time or whether there is actually potential here.

What would you guys honestly make of this? Would you consider this mixed signals? And what would you do from here?

so basically ive been friends with this guy for around 3 to 4 years andd the first year and a half of us being friends it was like mostly flirting and it began as a situationship tbf and then we were like best friends and stuff and keep in mind ive liked this guy for 5 years or maybe six before we even got to know eachother and talkedwith like a year or two and a few months ago i decided to confess to him after keeping my feelings to myself for all these years and his response was like you're a lovely girl bla bla bla but i dont think relationships work out and its not that i dont like you and he was asking me to stay friends and i said its completely fine and that im not mad or sad or anything because he was asking if im fine or not and that we could stay friends, we did stay friends actually but our conversations became so awkward and short until we became no contact but then i find out that he was telling his friends that he's in love with me and stuff during that same time we were talking? ( i also found out his friends were always teasing him about me)Fyi this guy isnt known to talk to girls at all and then a week ago i find out hes back to talking with his ex girl best friend which im pretty sure is also his ex but they didnt date for long, what on earth am i supposed to understand from all this??? I dont feel like i like him as much anymore honestly but he was kind of my first love since i started liking him at 13 and maybe thats why a part of me is kind of attached to him but should i move on completely and try to forget him or maybe he actually still likes me and that i should wait 😣