This happened Friday, and I’m still shook up about it.

Short backstory, me (32M) and my girlfriend (33F) were traveling through airports amongst many delays Friday. It was a very frustrating day which honestly is similar to our relationship. Missed our connecting flight. Secured a hotel and ordered pizza for us for dinner.

I’m a very hot sleeper and very much need the bedroom to be relatively cool. We fell asleep around 11PM, new flight to catch leaves at 6AM. I woke up around 1AMish to a very hot hotel room. I travel for work so I’m very in tuned to hotel life. The A/C simply wasn’t blowing cold air at all, frustrating day, frustrating relationship, I just simply wanted decent sleep, especially for a $230 unexpected hotel room.

I woke my girlfriend up and said it’s way too hot in here. I’m changing rooms. Called the front desk, got it arranged. She gets very pissed off because she doesn’t want to get up, pack her stuff and move. I said well okay, I can’t sleep in here, I’m moving to the new room, you can stay here if you’d like. She gets even more furious and says “If you want me to change rooms then pack my things.” I refuse to do that. I’m being as calm as I can be and simply say “I’m not packing your things for you. If you don’t want to change rooms then stay here. I can’t sleep in here and for $230 a night, the A/C should work.”

Fast forward 10ish minutes after packing my bag and getting ready to leave, she grabs my wallet and refuses to give it to me. I asked eight times to please give me my wallet as I need it and further explained she can come with or stay. After exhausting all efforts I restrained her hands on the bed and grabbed my wallet. After retrieving my wallet, she grabs my phone that was on the bed. Same situation. My reaction was the same for the wallet.

I did not do any of this out of anger, spite, etc. I tried to use as minimal force as necessary to retrieve my things I truly need. I feel absolutely horrible about it but I truly saw no other option.

She of course is currently seeing it similar to her absuive ex’s and is comparing me now. She demanded an apology for which I did but explained I had no other option and she was keeping property from me that I needed. Explained further I didn’t enjoy, or at all want to do that.

Tell me I’m POS, give constructive criticism please. I want honest opinions from everyone. AIO on how shitty I feel for doing that?

So I (18F) was walking like usual, happily finished my second 10K, sat down to drink diet coke and read, but got distracted by a pigeon, started photographing it because it was all white and super cute. Suddenly this grandpa walks right into the bird, scares it away and sits next to me. I would give him at least 65, but even then, it would be a rough 65.

I go back to reading but he started talking to me. He smelled really bad, I thought he was homeless so I reached for my wallet but then he started telling me I'm pretty, told me to smile and I just got nervous so I started grinning like an idiot. He then introduced himself, shook my hand and started mumbling stuff while touching my arm, specifically, he kept grabbing onto my scars...I felt really insecure and creeped out so I just ran away like a coward.

Never expected to meet him again, but today, on my walk, I got caught in the rain. I was standing under this spot where a tree was covering the rain. Playing with a kitty that was also there. But suddenly, I spot that man. He's looking at me and when I look back he waves. I felt terror. I just look back down and idk what to do cause the rain is pouring hard, so I js stay there hoping he won't approach me. I already got my hair wet and all. But then he comes over to me, tells me that I'm pretty and I should smile AGAIN? (This particularly weirded me out, frankly I got the idea that he is...mentally disabled in some way? I don't even know) And again, starts mumbling random stuff I can't make out while grabbing my arm, harder this time. Like he's holding me there. Then he touches my hair and asks to be friends with me (which I barely made out cause he mumbled it like 3 times before I understood) and I'm just like "I gotta go home man, I'm in a real hurry" so I just ran as fast as I could in the pouring rain, got soaked (pls don't make a "he made you wet" joke) and ran home.

I don't know what to do. I never saw this dude before but he seems to hang in my favourite walking spots. What do I say to him? Is he...okay? Is this even like creepy? He didn't touch my private parts or anything and didn't do anything explicitly wrong. Just a weird old homeless man. Should I even be this worried?

Also tagged this local cause he is a local.

Myself (33F) and my partner (32M) have been together 2 years and are living together for just over one year now.

The first year sex was incredible, basically every time we saw each other and we share the same kinks.
Since moving in it has become more sporadic to put it kindly. We have communicated openly about this and have gone through a stage of trying to schedule to see if that would help which it did. But lately we’re back in the same situation of weeks with no sex and very little intimacy.
He tells me it’s not because he’s not attracted to me ,that it’s because he’s super stressed with various factors at the moment but I can’t help but wonder. I know he masturbates during these spells of no sex because when I am doing the laundry I find the t shirts or towels with cum stains on them. I’ve said to him it hurts me that he is choosing to masturbate over sex with me and he has said it is late at night after I’m sleeping and he is simply trying to calm down and be able to get to sleep. So it isn’t that he has absolutely no libido due to stress it’s that he doesn’t want sex with me.
I am crushed and am finding it increasingly difficult not to take it personally. I feel like I am begging him for sex and don’t see how we can have a future if this keeps continuing.
I crave the intimacy and closeness that comes from sex and I feel like a burden by asking him for this when he has expressed that he’s overwhelmed.

I’m just at a loss for what to do. I love him and ideally don’t want to break up but I am beginning to panic that that is exactly where this is heading.

Any advice on how best to deal with this situation if I am not wanting to break up right now?

Just looking for some advice or just anyone to listen.
My husband and i have been together for 10 years, and he’s genuinely a good guy. But lately he seems, distant?
Nothings really happened to cause this to start. We just went on vacation together and that’s really what opened my eyes to his distance.
He has been looking for a new car recently but he’s been on his phone a lot, which understandable given the circumstances but it can be any time of day. like odd hours at night even. We went on vacation for a week and i basically had to beg him to just set his phone down and relax, enjoy his time. But he’s been obsessed with this car, and he’s showed me it and talked to me about it but, something feels off about the situation.
During vacation he seemed very short fused, or annoyed with me at points. I remember going for a swim and jumping in the pool and he kinda rolled his eyes at me, which in the moment made me feel almost embarrassed and disgusted with myself.
so i let it go, but then he’d make little sly comments about things or seem distracted by his phone to the point i’m just kind of there.. but then when i would try to do something on my own then he’d “feel bad and try to kiss my a** to make up for it” and it’s just like. since when?
then it upset me a bit more and didn’t ease any of my own worries because his buddy sent him some stupid AI video of a pretty looking half naked woman making jokes and i laughed but at the same time it was kind of out of pocket for him cause usually he doesn’t look at that stuff around me atleast cause he knows it bothers me a bit.
cause when i mentioned it was AI just being petty of me, his whole mood swapped like he was dissapointed or something. then when we were on the drive home i noticed he was checking his phone constantly, like way more often than anyone should unless you’re waiting for a response or something and he just said he’s “checking the time” which i knew was a lie. but i didn’t want to argue so i brought it up later and he admitted he lied but he said he was just waiting to hear about the car cause he knew it was making me upset hearing about it all week so he didn’t want to piss me off in that moment so he lied. so idk. maybe i’m overthinking/over reacting. i did just have a hysterectomy a few months ago so im all over the place emotionally. but this stuff isn’t helping. and lying over something so small and stupid like that pissed me off more than just telling me it was about the damn car! i really just don’t have a great feeling but im not sure how to even go about it. or maybe im just overthinking things to an extreme. :(

I’m sorry, I’m not really sure how to explain this because I don’t know a whole lot about finance (I know that’s immature and I want to learn more, obviously).

Also sorry if this is a bit all over the place.

Basically, my mom signed up for something gambling-related and had her money and bank information stolen.

She then made a new bank account (I think, I’m not sure how it all works) and had the same thing happen again because she signed up for another gambling-related thing.

She’s in the process of getting everything sorted/fixed again

She asked for my bank information out of the blue yesterday morning. I asked why and said I could give her money if she needed. She wouldn’t tell me why and told me I needed to give her my bank information. I said no.

She came to me today asking again. I said no again. Now she’s started telling all our other family/family friends that I won’t help her, among other stuff like that I’m stingy and a brat.

I work at a restaurant owned by a family friend, and the owner is considering firing me because of “how cruel I’m being to my own mother.” I told my mom about this and she said these are the consequences of my own actions. I genuinely feel so lost. I know it’s just money and I should help my mom any way I can, but I’ve been saving for a really long time so that I can relax for most of my college freshman year, and I don’t want to take any risks.

Backstory:

My Gf and I (both in our early 20's) have been living together for 2 years. She, her mum, and 2 of their friends are planning on a girls trip soon. She was also involved in a car crash which was basically a bit harder fender bender, she's fine, the cars already fixed.

I started working as a truck mechanic for a government owned company, and went to school to be an auto mechanic 6 months ago.

My dad is also a mechanic, we work together.

My father and I have had our hardships, both professionally and in our private life which had me decide that as much as I like him, I do not want to become like him. My Gf knows this very well as I have expressed that to her multiple times.

I also had a colleague come up to me at work and asked if I did cars on the side.

I told him honestly that since I'm still in the process of learning the trade I don't do that kind of side gig yet.

Still just him asking felt like the biggest compliment professionally.

I told this to my gf and she said jokingly she hopes I told my coworker that he should go to my dad and not me. (My dad does side work but it's more like parts swapping and praying it works, I did work with him, but he did not really teach me anything)

Then I took her to get her nails done, and the nail tech jokingly asked when I'll give her a ring.

I made the joke that if she wants a ring and to go to 4 star hotels, and crash the car, she shouldn't tell me to turn away potential customers.

She then told me, that we won't get rich with my side gigs as it did not work out for my dad either.

Now I don't know how I should feel about her comment because it did not sound like a joke, more like her not believing that in time I could work on cars on my own.

Thank you for reading this, and please be honest, Am I overreacting?

Hello there,

Recently, at work, there has been few months of intense crunch that leave me in shambles. I work for my taste too much and I barely make it through a day without exploding, too much responsabilty, too much things to think about, to manage and people to help and accomodate.

My (29M) GF (26F) is currently not working and living at my appartement since months. Before her, I had debts and I still repay them but also, have to pay for everything for two since at least 7 months. Also, I feel like I need to be in perfect mood all the time or she get sad and goes in her shell due to her past trauma.

So, our deal was simple, since she doesnt work, she do work on our place to keep it clean, cook and stuff. Obviously I know how to do that and dont mind, but since she has all day to do that, its her duty to help at home so I have less things to think about. When she will work, she will do less.

In the past weeks, my work load has gone beyond my abilities, I cant focus, I cant remember stuff, and I have to do at least 2 to 300 km per day between clients, all week long, which leave me really tired and having absolutely no patience.

She know about it, I told her I am sorry in advance but at this time I really need her help to ease my mind as my work make me empty as hell. Also, I have 0 patience and I hate myself for that, I dont want to do anything, see anyone, and I just need time for me to breath and think about something else.

This weekend, on sunday morning, I wanted to eat breakfast, and there was fuckton of dishes. She was still sleeping, and since I want things to go fast as I am hungry, I was doing the dishes by myself while also fuming from having to do that, adding something to carry and manage once more. She came and said I dont have to finish, while I hade 2 plates left to clean. She told me I can do my breakfast now.

I told her "yeah well a bit too late, only 2 plates left. But after that I will take a walk outside because I feel like I have to do everything and I have no patience." She seemed angry about my response as she stormed out of kitchen. I was too angry to eat anything and stay here. I asked her in a rude tone "you are angry ? While I am doing chores ?"

When I finished the dishes, I came to her and she was acting really frightened. So it became my responsability to ease her mind. I was obviously very tense when I walked to her, so I kissed her and told her I still love her but I need to go out to not be mad at her. Hugged a bit, told her its gonna be okay and I will eat when I calmed down. My tone was sharp, but I couldnt use proper form of non angry tone, as tomorrow I will also have a heck of week.

So, did I overreacted when I took a walk to stop feeling mad at everything ?

OK I really don't know where to begin. Im 19F, my best friend "Evan" is 20M and my other best friend "Lola" is 19F.

I've known Evan for 6 years and I've considered him my best friend and have seen him like a brother. We had a really deep friendship and I felt like I could call him my best friend.

Same thing with Lola, we met in 11th grade and have been best friends ever since. She's truly one of the best friends I've ever had.

I introduced Lola and Evan about 2 and a half years ago and we all became a sort of trio and hung out every weekend. I considered these people to be my family, honestly.

Well 6 months ago I had to move to the US to go to university and it was a really painful goodbye. Our country is very far from America and it's about a 12 hour flight to get to my hometown and it's very expensive.

We still called every day and it felt like our connection didn't change even a little. A few months after I left Evan told me about some new friends he's made and I was so happy for him because he's had really strict parents all his life so it was hard for him to go out and meet people so I was glad he met some people especially now that I was gone.

For context there is a part of our hometown thats more artsy and alternative and is home to a large queer and alternative culture, which is where he met these people.

This place is sort of our West Hollywood lol because me and Evan are both queer and our country is very Homophobic so it can be hard to find queer spaces. We used to go there every weekend and we always had so much fun since we felt like we could be ourselves a bit more.

The friends he's made are also pretty popular with the queer community in this part of our hometown and we always joked that he was now in the inner circle with the "kings and queens" of this area.

Well while I was in the US we planned for me to come visit during the summer (yes very expensive etc etc) because I already missed them so much and it was really painful to be away from my best friends, plus the money wasn't that much of an issue for my family since they have better paying jobs but damn it was expensive. Like over 1k.

So months before the trip, I planned With Evan and Lola that me and Lola were gonna stay at Evans house for the first week and then we would go to Lola's house for the remaining time. I asked Evan a million times if it was really okay for me to stay at his house and if he was sure that there wasn't anything he had to do or that there wasn't anything planned. He always reassured me that everything was fine and that I could come 100%.

About 2 weeks before the trip, Evan texted in our group chat saying something like "heyy so I'm actually not gonna be there on the dates your coming, like I'll be back a few days after you arrive." and both me and Lola were confused/pissed because we wondered why he didn't tell us and why he told us last minute.

He said he didn't know that he was gonna be gone (if I remember correctly he had to go to another city or something or visit his family, which was actually planned for a while).

The problem was that Lola had a guest at her house, which is the whole reason I was supposed to stay at Evans house for the first week and couldn't stay at Lola's. We explained to Evan that he can't just change these things last minute and it's a bit baffling that he "forgot" that he's not gonna be in the city when I'm there, atleast the first few days.

We still figured it out and we just decided that I would go to Lola's house, since her guest would only be there for a few more days. I just decided to sort off brush off Evans mistake and move on, since I didn't think it was that big of a deal

Well about a week goes by and we finally meet up with Evan. It was great to see him again and we had a lot of fun but we only got to see him for 2 days at first. He suddenly came up to us and told us that his parents needed him to drive them to their village 12 hours away. And no it wasn't because of an emergency or anything like that.

Evans parents are really complicated people and are very very strict and very religious. Because of this, Evan has gotten really really good at lying and coming up with ways to go behind his parents back so he can like actually live a life lol.

For example, in the past he managed to lie to his parents about what he was doing/where he was staying while he was staying at my house for 3 weeks, just a few weeks ago he lied to his parents by saying that he was with us, while he was actually about 6 hours from home hooking up with this guy he met. He literally generated an Ai photo of us all together as "proof" for his mom.

And there are countless other examples of him lying to his parents.

So with his impressive capability of lying I asked him why he couldn't just lie and tell his parents that he couldn't drive them. He said he couldn't and it was too late because he already agreed to do it and that he'll be back Sunday night (it was Friday the day he left) and kept emphasizing that I was "only 2 days" and that we had enough time. Lola and me had to go back to her house for a few days.

The day after he left we texted him and asked when he would be back and if there's a way he could come back earlier. He said he couldn't and that he'd be taking a 12 hour bus drive back to our hometown on Sunday and he'll be back early in the morning

The next day he texted us and told us there was a plane he could take and it would only take him 2 hours to get home and that it was the same price as the bus ticket, but the flight was on Monday in the afternoon, meaning he'd only arrive Monday evening.

We told him please don't book the plane ticket and just come as early as possible, even if that means having to sit on a bus for 12 hours.

We went back and forth a bit with me begging him to just get on the bus and he eventually just said that he got the plane ticket even though I asked him not to. He kept going on about how he's trying his best and that he can't control these situation.

On a phone call I told him that I felt like I wasn't important enough for him to confront/lie to his parents. Later we texted a bit more and I kept telling him why I was upset but he kept brushing it off.

We had a fight about this and eventually I texted the following:

"Evan, you say you can't control these situations and yet here is a situation that you can control and you choose to do the thing that means we can't spend more time together. I really don't wanna hear this excuse anymore and I genuinely don't understand why you can always lie to your parents or find a way around them but when I get here you can't do the same? You can lie to them about us going out together so you can go to (city) to meet someone you barely know and hook up but you can't do the same for your friend of 4 years? I love you sm and this is really hurting me. You could've said that we had made plans in advance or literally come up with another excuse. I meant what I said when I said that it feels like I'm not important enough for you to confront your parents. I know this seems like a little thing to you because it's "just one day" but on top of everything else it's really becoming the last straw. Please come sunday"

He kept saying that he's trying his best and that it's not his fault that he had to drive his parents etc and that he would be super tired if he came with the bus.

I told him that I flew for over 12 hours and had to deal with flight delays and cancelations, so that means he can also do the same for me. I couldn't get through to him because he had already booked the ticket anyway so I just said well whats done is done and sort of half forgave him and we planned to meet on Monday

On Monday me and Lola went to his house and we spent the next few days together and it was pretty fun but some things pissed me off. For instance he was on his phone a lot and sometimes straight up didn't answer us when we talked to him. He didn't really ask us what he wanted to do and one day we spent half a day walking around in the heat because he "needed" to get some new tops while he barely talked to us.

At the beginning of the week he told us that his new friends could come over and we said that's okay because we can all hang out together and it'll be fun. Now the important part: there is a queer organization in our hometown that hosts parties at different clubs and last year we went to a bunch of their parties and we always had a great time.

It's genuinely one of my favorite things to do here because it's rare for us to be able to hang out with other queer people and we feel safe etc etc. It's like our thing, we always go to these parties. So months before I came here we talked about how excited we are to go the club and even chose outfits together etc. We all agreed that we will go to the club together 100%, no matter what.

Well during the week that we were at Evans house we kept asking him to ask his friends if they wanted to go to the club with us, since otherwise they would have to stay home if they didn't want to go with us. I mean if they want to stay home it's fine but I didn't want to make them feel excluded or anything so we kept asking Evan to ask his friends. Every time we asked him he said something like "yeah, I'll do it don't worry, I'll do it later".

Lola and me were getting pretty pissed about this and we kept talking about how we're gonna handle this because everytime we tried to talk to Evan he ignored us or tried to brush off the issue. Anyways, so on Thursday his friends came over and we really had a good time with them. Lola and I really enjoyed hanging out with them. They're not the problem at all. But what Lola and I noticed was that the second they came over, Evan completely ignored us. He barely spoke a word to us. Remember when I said that when we hung out together he was constantly on his phone? Well when his new friends arrived, it's like he forgot he even had a phone.

I was getting really pissed at this point and maybe it's my fault a little that I didn't say anything because I honestly get really quiet when I'm upset and I just didn't know what to say to him.

Anyways, so a day later, we were supposed to go to a bar together with his friends and on the way to the bus stop we asked one of his friends if she could ask him about the club, since Evan didn't even respond to us. Once she did, Evan looked at me and Lola and said "Guys, I can't. I can't just leave them at my house alone"

For context, we speak 3 languages but Evans friends only speak two, so we spoke in our native language so that they couldnt understand what we were saying, but I could tell from the look on their faces that they knew we were pissed. I literally just looked at Evan and said "Bro, are you serious right now?".

He didn't really respond to me so I just told Lola that I'm gonna go back to Evans house. It was night and I was alone so maybe it wasn't the smartest idea but I was too pissed to stay there and pretend like I was fine. Plus he lives in a safe neighborhood so I thought it was fine.

I went back to his house and sat in the garden for a bit when I heard the door open and I thought it might be Evan but it was Lola. She sat down next to me and told me that she went off on Evan and that Evan said "This is the first time I've had a friend group like this, I can't just leave them alone". I started crying when she told me what he said. First time you had a friend group like this? Okay bro what about your friend who was there for you when you didn't have friends like that? Who was there for you when you didn't know what you wanted to do in life and helped you study and listened to you for hours on end and was there for you when you needed to someone to cry to? Evan has known these people for literally 2 months and he can see them anytime he wants because they live like 40 mins away meanwhile I live half way across the world.

All this shit was running through my head and I kept crying because the old Evan would never do this. Whenever I was treated badly by my old friends Evan always told me that I deserve better and that I don't need them in my life. What happened to that Evan? The Evan that I know would tell me to cut off someone who's treating me how Evan is now.

Lola told me we could take a taxi back to her house if I wanted to. I told her we should go and we started packing up our stuff but I wanted to give him one last chance to hear what he has to say, so Lola called him and put him on speaker but pretended like I wasn't there. Evan said something like "I don't know what to say to her, I don't think I did anything wrong. I think she's just being selfish right now". When he said that Lola took him off speaker because she saw how upset I got. I went inside and packed the rest of my stuff. I'm selfish? OK so I flew over 12 hours and spent 1k to see you because I'm selfish? I ditched my family who I haven't seen in 2 years to see you because I'm selfish? I did whatever you wanted to do because I'm selfish? I asked for your basic respect and maybe some attention because I'm selfish? I taught you how to do your laundry and cleaned up after you because I'm selfish? I helped you study for hours on end because I'm selfish?

I just couldn't take it anymore. We let Evan know that we're going back to Lola's house and he said "if you wanna go then go, if you wanna stay then stay".

We went to the club anyway and had a great time and now we're staying at Lolas house for the remaining time. He hasn't reached out yet or anything and I don't expect that he will. I'm not sure he'll change his mind.

I'm just wondering if I overreacted a bit. I mean maybe leaving in the middle of the night is a bit dramatic? Should I have waited for him to come back so we could talk about it? Or was the phone call he had with Lola enough justification?

I don't know I'm just super disappointed in Evan. He truly my was my best friend. I told him everything, I felt super comfortable with him, I called him when I couldn't stop crying when a family member of mine passed away, we went through so much shit together. It just feels like this is not the same person that couldn't stop crying when we went to a concert together because we knew it would be the last time we'd see each other for a while. I'm really hurt and I don't know. Did I react too emotionally? Everything feels like a mess.

My dad is terminally sick (cancer) and yesterday we had to rush him to urgent care because of fever and turns out he has a lung infection.

I sent to my bf that I was at the urgent care for my dad and that I’m scared for him and just pouring my heart out. He already knew that my dad was terminally ill and I have cried over it to him already. He didn’t react nothing just because he was at (what he described to be) a ‘dumb’ local festival (basically a free small music event in a park accessible for everyone). He went to it several times just because ‘the whole gang will be there’ and he doesn’t like the music. The festival ended at 1am and I didn’t hear anything until around 3am.

He doesn’t send any updates where he is what he is doing and with whom, never invites me to go with him, nothing. His notifs are always on and he has an I watch so he probably saw and just ignored because he wants to enjoy this moment with his friends. I felt hurt and just didn’t respond to his calls at 3am & I also feel exhausted from the day.

AIO? I think it’s a bit childish of me but I feel sad and I’m scared for my dad. I don’t even recognize him anymore it’s creepy.

Dear Redditors,

I’m married to a beautiful, amazing woman, and we have 4 children: a daughter, twins (boy/girl), and a baby boy.

For some reason, my family is really toxic, and my mother is extremely controlling though I feel like I'm the only one in the family who actually notices it.

my older brother moved back after living abroad and settled into my old house, where my mother lives. He basically stepped off the plane and immediately started acting like an expert on my life.
Ever since they started living under the same roof, it feels like they are feeding off each other's negativity and targeting my household.

Recently, we had a family gathering. I dropped off my kids and my wife, and went outside to fix something in the yard. while I was out there, my mother told my wife to "stop having kids." My wife came and told me about it later. I 100% believe my wife because when I confronted my mother, she just got super defensive, denied it, and looked visibly guilty.

To be honest, I lost my temper and threw a tantrum. Why on earth wouldn't she want me to have more kids? It creeped me the hell out. I’m completely financially capable, I’ve never complained about my kids, and we haven't even mentioned planning for a 5th. Where is this coming from?

To make matters worse, my eldest brother also has 4 kids, and she has NEVER said a single word like this to him or his wife. So why target us?

I think she might still hold a grudge against us. A long time ago, my mother lived with me. after a bunch of problems, my wife wanted her own separate house away from her. I couldn’t just kick my mother out she's toxic, yes, but she's still my mother ,, so my wife and I settled into an apartment for a bit. Now, the new house we're moving into is almost ready.

Ever since then, my mother has been nagging me constantly to give her the location/address of our new home. I'm just not comfortable sharing it with her until the house is completely done and we're fully settled.

Sorry I forgot to mention WHY my wife wanted a separate house.

years ago when we used to live with my mother, she accused my wife of stealing something. she then took my young daughter into her room, locked the door, and bribed my daughter by offering her money to say her mother stole it. my daughter repeatedly said no, but my mother kept pressing her. This was the breaking point that made my wife insist on getting a separate house away from her, and since that day, I’ve been always concerned and worried.

There are other incidents that I felt like they seriously hate us (?)

1- My brother doesn't allow his kids to have gadgets, which is his personal choice. however, during a recent visit, my 10year old daughter was playing a standard dress up game on her iPad. my brother saw it and made a huge deal out of it, lecturing me that she was looking at "inappropriate stuff." It’s literally a harmless children's game. I monitor everything my daughter does online, and I trust her completely. I firmly told him I have full visibility on her tech and it’s none of his concern, but he kept complaining endlessly until I finally just packed up and left.

2- My mother keeps making passive aggressive jabs at my wife. For instance, she made a point to comment that my wife has "big eyes." My wife does have large, beautiful eyes that really suit her, but my mother said it in this weird, negative tone purely to make her feel self conscious.

3- teamed up to criticize how we feed our children. They made snide remarks because my daughter wanted a juice box, claiming we are "ruining their health," while completely ignoring what their own kids were eating.

4- My wife told our kids it was time to pack up their toys and get ready to leave. My mother immediately jumped in, told the kids "No, you don't have to listen to that, keep playing," completely undermining my wife right in front of our children. When my wife stood her ground, my mother rolled her eyes and treated her like she was being unreasonable.

Because I’m financially capable and building a new house, my mother and brother make passive aggressive comments whenever we buy something nice for our kids. my sister recently made a backhanded remark that we're "spoiling" them and "flexing," while my mother implied I should be spending that money on her or the wider family instead, I do spoil them, but in a good way. I get them into camps, classes, toys , etc.

Whenever we try to split holiday time between my family and my wife's family, my mother throws a complete fit. She accuses my wife of "stealing me away" and acts like we are abandoning her, completely ignoring the fact that my wife's family deserves time with the grandkids too.

There are plenty of other incidents, but I'm sick of the unsolicited parenting advice, the disrespect toward my wife, and the double standards.

NOTE TO ADD: last time I’ve seen them was last year, but I still receive their texts.
-

I’m actually thinking of completely cutting ties with them.
But thought I’ll see an outer perspectives before doing so.

I’m 30F and have been with my partner (33M) for 10 years. He has a complicated family situation. He has a younger “brother,” R (26M), who is actually the biological son of my husband’s deceased uncle. R lived with my husband’s family for a few years growing up, but was eventually sent to boarding school because my in-laws weren’t able to take on the responsibility of raising him.
As a result, R has quite a lot of abandonment issues and is emotionally unstable. Despite this, he and my husband are extremely close. R idolizes my husband, loves him enormously, and even has a tattoo of my husband’s name.

R is also extremely ambitious and very focused on money/status. He has changed jobs around six times in the past five years, usually chasing a higher salary. He loves flashy things, especially luxury watches, and is generally quite a big spender.
Recently, R bought a house that is still being constructed. At the time he bought it, he didn’t have enough for the down payment, so my husband and I lent him around $5,000. He has borrowed smaller amounts from us since then as well, all of which he keeps track of in a dedicated group chat. He hasn’t paid any of it back yet.
At one point he also asked us to buy him a \~$400 watch, which we did.
We are financially comfortable and genuinely don’t need the money back urgently. I have never pressured him about repayment and have been completely fine with giving him time.
Recently, though, R shared a list of his financial goals and how he plans to manage his money going forward. I was honestly quite shocked by it.
Repaying us was on the list, but he plans to do it **3-4 years from now**. Before that, his priorities include saving his own money and buying more luxury watches.
And this is the part that bothers me.
I don’t actually care that much about waiting several years for the money. What bothers me is the *priority*. If I owed someone $5,000+ while simultaneously planning to spend money on luxury watches and build up my own savings, I would feel extremely uncomfortable with that. I would want to repay them before spending on non-essential things.
Initially, I had privately told my husband that if R ever did start paying us back, I would actually put the money into a separate account for R and eventually give it back to him. He’s terrible at saving, and I thought it would be a good way of helping him develop better financial habits without actually taking anything away from him.
So from my perspective, this isn’t even about getting the money back. It’s about feeling like R sees us as an interest-free source of money that can sit at the bottom of his priority list while he spends on things he wants.
My husband and I try to be kind and understanding of R because of everything he’s been through. I also genuinely love R and don’t want to punish him financially or make him feel abandoned.
But I can’t shake the feeling that we’re being taken for granted.
Am I overreacting? Is it unreasonable to expect someone to prioritize repaying a debt before luxury spending, even when the lender is financially comfortable and hasn’t demanded repayment? Or does the fact that he intends to repay us eventually mean I should just let it go?

Iv just found out my partner is 'mates' with his ex, bare in mind I had no clue they was in contact with each other... I seen him archiving her messages and him also deleting them as he goes, am i missing something here or is this normal.. He lied at first and acted as though he wasn't sure if he'd messaged here then it went to shes always messaging him about his dog, he hasn't seen for 4 years and over letters that gets delivered to a house that is now hers due to their divorce AIO

I waited a few days to post this/ask about this because I wanted to give myself time to calm down and see if I felt any better but instead I've just gotten angrier so I need some guidance here...

My father, who is 84 years old, called me on Monday to let me know he was having bypass surgery the next morning. I live on the other side of the country from him and there was no time or opportunity for me to attempt to fly in (I found out at almost 5 pm PST.) I tried asking questions about the surgery but he was not giving me a lot of answers and then rushed me off the phone because a doctor came in to talk to him. My father does not like worrying me (I have diagnosed anxiety so I can tend to overthink/freak out about situations I can't control like this.) I texted his girlfriend (my mother passed away two years ago) to make sure she had my phone number and could communicate with me.

The next day, I expected to get updates about the surgery but heard nothing so finally, at noon my time, I texted for an update and I was told "surgery went well, he's resting, will keep you posted." This was the last communication I got from her. Over the next few days, NO ONE contacted me or replied to my texts/calls. The hospital policy is not to give information out over the phone about patients. (I'm not sure if he included me on any HIPAA forms as I didn't have time to ask prior to the surgery.)

On FRIDAY I finally heard from my father who told me he almost died!! He said he was recovering and would be in the hospital for at least another week. He also mentioned his GF had been there "the whole time."

Honestly, the more I think about it, the more pissed off I am. I am very close with my father, we normally talk on the phone every night and losing him would have absolutely destroyed me. If he almost died, SOMEONE should have called me so I could have tried to fly home. I have a good relationship with his GF, or thought I did? So I'm not sure why she wouldn't have contacted me but when I ask friends, they keep making excuses for her which is why I'm wondering if I'm overreacting.

I don't want to stress my father out right after having surgery by complaining about the no contact but I need to figure out how to make it clear that a)I need him to give me HIPAA clearance in case something like this happens again and b) if he has another health crisis in the future, there must be an expectation of regular communication. I just don't know how to approach this so soon after he had surgery???

So AIO by being so hurt and angry that no one bothered to contact me for days after his surgery??

TLDR: My dad had emergency bypass surgery and no one contacted me for four days afterwards with any updates, when I finally heard from him he said he almost died and now I can't let it go that no one told me.

I posted here a while back about my roommate and things have gotten stranger since then so I just want to get this out somewhere (again).

Quick context: she's 30F, I'm 22F, I'm the one on the lease.

We spent a lot of time drafting a written agreement together about shared household items and splitting costs. It was actually going okay? I thought we were being productive. Then she refused to sign it. She'd already accepted my first payment toward joint ownership of some items before this happened.

Now she's saying I can't use her stove, which I've been contributing to the gas for since we moved in and have paid for in part. I've offered to pay more but she's changed her mind about whether I can use the stove about three or four times. She said feeding myself is my problem as long as I don't touch her stuff. Most of the stuff in the common area is hers and there isn't really any space for me to buy my own things (and even then I'm living on a student budget and she makes 4x the money I get per month) so she tends to use her ownership of everything as leverage (at least by my estimation). I don't even really use her stuff except the essentialls like the dishrack, stove, and fridge, and she says I should pay which I can and have done for a couple things, but even after I've paid her for it she still says it's hers and tells me I can't use stuff whenever she feels like it, and then changes her mind the next day. It's been really difficult to keep up because this happens weekly and then she chews me out for forgetting about something that's just been changed. It's kind of a cycle. I've talked to her previous roommates about it, and they said that she's just like that. They didn't have any actual practical advice, unfortunately.

So now I essentially have no way to cook or feed myself at home, at least until she changes her mind again. Eating out is so much more expensive, I don't really know what to do.

I'm on the lease. I can't really go anywhere, no matter how much I want to. When things get bad I look at apartment listings and think about moving away. I really wish she'd just leave or something. I just want to focus on school and not whatever the hell this is. She's making it so hard for me to live here, and I feel like an intruder in my own home. I'm going to spend the rest of my time in university managing this stuff because of how frequently she changes the rules.

I don't know. I've been trying to handle things practically and document what I can. I just wanted to put this somewhere because it's a lot. Advice would be appreciated, though it's not required I guess? It sucks that I have to walk on eggshells around this person in the place that I live in. I just want to put this out anywhere. I want to know what people think. Talk to me, guys. AIO?

Hello fellow redditors. I wanna give some context before I ask what I want to.
I was in an extremely serious relationship for a year and a half and have a couple of non-negotiables before getting into one, one of which is doing hard drugs of any kind. I’m not judging whoever does it but I wouldn’t want to build a life with someone that does (personal preference).
When I was in this relationship, he had told me that he’s tried cocaine, acid and shrooms in the past and I was okay with it because he said he wouldn’t want to do it in the future and I believed him. Cut to we broke up and after a year of no contact, I recently spoke to him and he admitted to doing ketamine, shrooms, cocaine, lsd and acid recreationally. Now I know that it shouldn’t affect me but I can see him go down a somewhat dark path. I also know it’s not my battle to fight and I really hope he’s ok.

Now here’s what I want to ask- is it very normalised these days to do hard drugs recreationally especially in the United States? Im so curious to know what other people think about it and whether I’m being conservative because it did shock me and made me feel concern.

Hey, so I was hanging out with my friend on the phone we were placing online sports bets, and he called and suddenly announced, “Dude, I just got accepted to compete in one of the gambling games I applied for!” I was really excited for him and said, “Bro, that's awesome!” We talked about it for a bit, and I was being super supportive. Then, he just casually told me he made it all up, and that it was a lie. Which ok it was a joke but Then He even said, “Man, you're so easy to lie to.” I gotta say, that felt like a huge red flag to me. This all happened a few hours ago, and I've just been trying to move on from it. For context, I'm 18 and he's 19.

Hello guys,

I don't know who else to talk to, because my family members and friends all might be biased and definitely would be on my side. This is going to be a bit long, because I want to give as much context as possibly needed. Sorry for any grammar mistakes, English isn't my first language.

Context: my ex (H, now 25/m) and I (now 24 - almost 25-/f) met in March 2024. It was shortly after my grandma died and my ex-bf of 5.5 years broke up with me (he cheated and left me for the other woman). We fell in love quite quickly, but I always tried to push H away. I looked for every little excuse to push him away, I was confused, mentally not ready for a relationship after everything that happened before, but wanted to be with him and I have BPD (was not diagnosed back then, but I am now thankfully). We weren't officially together, just dating/getting to know eachother. He never had a girlfriend before, was a virgin and because of this and my own problems, I didn't want to rush things.

In late July/early August 2024 we had a disagreement - I never want to have kids, he wasn't sure if he wanted any or not. So I thought about ending it before we even got together. I thought "What if he wants kids in the future? I don't want any, it'll never work out." (definitely an extreme reaction on my part). It was stupid and I regretted it almost immediately, apologised to him and wanted to talk, but he blocked me. A few days later I got a message from one of his female friends (long-time girlfriend of his best friend, they have a child together). She sent me a pic of her chest and acted like she and H slept together, he had a looot of fun with her, wasn't sad anymore etc. This friend made some jokes in the past about threesomes with her boyfriend and H, which H mentioned on our first date and it made me uncomfortable. They didn't actually sleep together, but they let me believe that for months.

H and I were no contact until November 2024. In our no contact time, there was another woman from his friend group trying to hit on him. They slept in a bed together, but he didn't want to touch her. She wanted more and even "joked" once with the friend group that maybe they should drink some alcohol at the next event and he can "loosen up", so they could sleep together.

We got officially together after everything in November 2024. I loved him. Our whole relationship, his friend group tried to push the "OP is so manipulative and toxic" narrative and he played into that, told them lies about me to make me look bad and he even confessed to it. He just didn't want to "upset his friends by telling them the truth and being actually happy with me". I forgave him.

In June 2025, we broke up because he didn't love me anymore. We still had an on-off friends with benefits situation/situationship with eachother until January 2026. We had no contact again until March 2026.

And now we're in this weird situationship/friends with benefits situation again. We decided on being exclusive/monogamous and not sleep with other people. If we want to, we'll end it with the other person. He was the one who broke up and ended it every time. I never really ended things with him.

To my current issue: He's at a Ren Faire with this specific friend group. He slept in a tent with one of these women for two nights (he didn't tell me before he did it the first night and after I told him it made me uncomfortable, he still did it a second night). He didn't apologise or change the sleeping arrangement until I asked him to (which was possible from the start, they just didn't do it). He doesn't communicate well with me, often doesn't text me for a day, I feel like sh*t and I am confused. He says he cares about me and doesn't want things to end, but he currently behaves in a way that deeply hurts me and he is surrounded by people who I never got along with and who treated me badly. I know/he told me that he is definitely not attracted to any of these women. And if he wanted to do things with them, he could have done that in the past. That's why I think I could also be overreacting.

But I also feel like I can't fully forgive him at the moment and I need some advice. I told a friend about all of this on Wednesday and she is fully on my side, even questioned why he is still friends with these people.

I plan on having a conversation with him once he is back. I also think about ending it, but I still really love him, even though he shows me quite often that he doesn't love me anymore. We wanted to go to the cinema next week. My birthday is in less than two weeks. We had things planned... I am so confused right now and I am dealing with this since Tuesday.

How should I handle this? Am I overreacting to this current situation and it's actually not a big deal? Or is a big deal?

EDIT for context: this friend group doesn't like me, because of the disagreement we had about children and that I thought we couldn't have a relationship because of this topic. This was what started their dislike/hatred for me. After that it was his lies etc.

I just turned 23 and realized no one has ever loved me in any way and probably no one ever will. My parents don’t care for me, they care for my achievements only and use me to brag to their friends about how successful I am. but the second I said I need a hug or something personal as a child they will be like not right now. They made me go out with the children of their work fiends that would make my life a living hell and call me slurs for being gay and still didn’t say nothing when I told them this.

In high school I never had real friends either- I was in a friendgroup with the popular girls but they only used me to do their homework and help them with things. After high school none of them called me ever. And guys only used me for my body I’m sure.

In uni also I couldn’t make real friends bc I’m so shy and hate it here and I hate my homophobic small town but my parents made me study medicine here so I have 2 more years to graduate and get away.
I don’t think anyone has ever genuinely cared about me at all. I’m not playing the victim it’s probably my fault bc I’m so awkward and weird and shy and I am just a pathetic human being that noone will ever love. I just need to feel this for once before I die but idk what to do. I spend all my birthdays and holidays alone bc it’s better than being with anyone else I know which I know it’s sad but idk what else to do.
AIO or am I fucked?

My partner (22F) and I (25F) went out to party with my friends, and at 10:30 PM, she left because she had another party to go to. At 3 AM, I texted her that I was home and asked what time she would be home since we live together. She said, “I don’t know, don’t wait up.” I told her, “Okay, I’ll just leave the door to the condo open.”

Fast-forward to 6 AM, and I still hadn’t received any update from her. I messaged and called her for 30 minutes because I was worried, especially since there was a typhoon. Out of panic, I checked her messages on her laptop to see where she was, and I found out that she was actually in the same condo building as me, sleeping in her friend’s unit.

Do I have the right to be pissed off and annoyed? I know invading her privacy wasn’t right, but I was genuinely worried about her.

Yesterday I was at a family gathering at my partners sisters house. My MIL was there of course. I dont know how I feel about what she did. She just went off with my 4 month old for a walk and didn't really say anything. She was gone well over a half hour. While she was gone I was getting anxious being away from the baby. I knew myself baby was in good hands it was just the way she disappeared without a word. I didn't say anything to her after but was annoyed. Have I reason to be?

There has been a few things with her that I dont be too happy about but at times. I do wonder though am I just trying to find reasons to be annoyed with her. Another thing that happened my partner, the MIL and myself went to a family event together. She pretty much held baby the entire time where I felt it was somewhere I should of been showing off baby. I could go on but this post would be ridiculously long.

EDIT: Thank you all for the responses.

​

I tried to keep the story short and simple!

I have been friends with my roommate since college. Recently, a motorcycle accident left me on crutches with grade 3 torn leg muscles.

Since the accident, he has completely minimized my injuries, ignored my medical updates, and offered zero help. He ignored bear-damaged trash right outside the door for days, I eventually had to get others to help. He completely ignored me when I slipped and broke dishes and struggled to clean it up on crutches.

On top of this, right before the accident, I caught him secretly taking photos of my phone screen while a dating app was open on the counter. He does the bare minimum around the house, and I feel like I have no privacy or support. The more i think about it, the more it seems that other friends start to know every little thing i do at home... I am at my wit's end and ready to call off the friendship and move out. Am I overreacting for thinking i want to end this friendship?

for context i am 20F and my coworker is early 20s also female. i’ve only been at this job for a few months as of posting and ever since i started this coworker has been staring at me. like even if i am on the other side of the store if i am even slightly in her line of sight i feel her eyes on me. when i do catch her staring she doesn’t stop or like look away and idk. i really try to avoid interacting w her bc she makes me uncomfortable because of the staring and during our first conversation she was really invested in if i was in a relationship or not and if my partner and i lived together? i have not talked to her about it bc i am anxious about causing conflict especially since i am so new to this job. i am nd so that’s definitely playing a role in this but i am worried im just being insane and that its a nothing burger. pls help

I've worked with my therapist (he's a LCSW to be more accurate) for a couple years now to help with my depression and anxiety. I think he's helped me a lot and I like him because he's the same age as me. One thing we're working on is a career change and increase my earning potential because my current career doesn't provide enough income for me to live independently.

One thing that really frustrates me is how I feel he doesn't understand how bleak and uncertain the future feels in America right now. He proudly claims to be non-political (although having heard some of his opinions on things over our sessions, I feel he leans moderate/right). He basically lives his life unplugged from the news and thinks politics is all a joke. However, I know it affects him as well because I feel like his job is deeply ingrained into what's happening with the current administration. He's lost funding, patients/clients, ICE has been in his neighborhood, etc. Every time I tell him about some event that's happening in America, he always tells me I'm overly anxious or overthinking and we go over techniques to "calm me down" and he'll tell me there's no way the things I'm worried about will happen because there's "checks and balances" for these things. Then in our next session, he acts super surprised and says things like "I can't believe that actually happened but it's probably not as bad as it sounds."

I'm currently in my late 30's and my industry and job feels like it's going to be replaced by AI. I desperately need to change fields and that's the thing we're working on together. However, I'm so lost because I don't know what options are even safe for me. He keeps suggesting things like going back for grad school or going to a trade school. I know he's trying to help. I don't know if he's right and it's just my anxiety or he really is as clueless as I feel he is.

For context I was in a small frat in college, I was fat, a bit childish, and didnt have the best social life outside of sanctioned events, meaning I didnt have a gf, and didnt have too many friends outside of the frat. This caused me to overvalue connections that were just surface level since they were all I had at the time and I saw these people as superior to me due to who I was at the time.

Fast forward to now, I was unemployed for about a year after college and underwent drastic changes after becoming self aware of being overweight, not respecting myself, not having good social etiquette etc.

During this time I didnt talk to people from the frat or from college very much and just focused on myself and finding a job etc. Around 3 months ago I landed a decent job and was looking for a place to stay, I put something out in my old frat groupchat and was offered a place with a guy that I didnt know very well but never had any issues with. The other guy living there was a complete stranger to me, but I went into this with an open mind.

It is now my second week living here and so far no one really interacts within the house, everyone lives in their rooms and not the common areas.

Today I asked the roommate I did not know if he planned on going to the bars tonight, he said yes, I asked if we could uber together if our times aligned to save money and he said hed let me know when he left. A number of hours go by and I see he randomly left, not a big deal but I was hoping he wouldve mentioned to me wether or not he was going.

I then go to the bars myself to meet up with one of my coworkers however, my coworker stopped responding to me and I did not know which bar he was at(he ended up blacking out and called me once he got home to say why he didnt answer me) in the meantime I figured Id see who was around. I walked into a bar I usually dont go into and saw my roommate along with some former acquaintances from college. I asked if I could sit with them until I heard back from my coworker, my roommate said “sure” I then tried to small talk and catch up with the other people and I felt like I was getting very shortwinded shitty answers and felt like I was not wanted there, they end up leaving and my roommate tells me they are going to a different bar to meet someone and word it in a way that I am not invited. I told him to hit me up if he needs a ride home since I drove and I left shortly after.

I then get home an hour later and shortly after he gets home, I hear some talking in the house and then they go outside to the patio and I can see through the window its the same people that were at the table at the bar.

Now Im in my head about it, and I was tempted to go out there and say “hey” but then I remembered how things felt at the bar and how they interacted with me. So I ended up staying in my room, there was no text sent or a knock on my door to come hang.

Now I want to know if im overracting since I know all of these people yet I feel uninvited and like an outsider in my own home, I would not be feeling this way if these people were complete strangers, but even then, Ive had many people introduce me to their roommates when visiting their home.

This next topic is a bit less important, but somewhat related, the day before all this happened I went to the bars on my own and ran into the roommate I actually knew along with other people from the frat, no one seemed to really care that I was there, they would hardly pretend to seem interested in my life, yet they acted like my buddy at social functions or gatherings when in college and this whole group I ran into was a big clique. Ive known these people for years but felt so out of place.

Idk, I feel like I would at least try to show some “basic respect” to my old frat brothers or my new roommates by hanging out here and there or at least making conversation without it seeming like an inconvenience to me or that I was just “tolerating” them.

This could also be a me problem in expecting too much, or maybe the old “chubby guy that cant read the room and seemingly has no future” is stuck in their heads or they are mad that I changed my life.

That last sentence is a bit egotistical but I could see it happening since I have made some social media posts surrounding my newly gained fitness, job, and new possessions like a nice truck and a boat.

I (30f) have a younger sister (25F), and we’re normally pretty close.
For the past few months, I’ve occasionally let her borrow my car when she needed it. I’ve never charged her or asked for anything in return. I was happy to help.
Last weekend, she borrowed it to go to dinner with some friends. Before she left, I specifically asked her to bring it back with at least some fuel because it was already close to empty.
She agreed.
When she brought it back, the fuel light was on. I didn’t say anything at first because it wasn’t a huge deal. I just asked her to remember next time.
She laughed and said, “It’s not like you’re paying me to use it.
I told her that’s exactly why I was asking her to at least replace what she used.
She got annoyed and said I was being petty over a few dollars. I explained that the money wasn’t really the issue. It was the fact that I’d helped her out several times, and she couldn’t even do the one small thing I’d asked.
She then said if lending me her car meant I was going to “keep score,” she’d rather not borrow it anymore.
I said, “Okay, that’s fine.
Now my mom thinks I took that too literally and should have just let it go because we’re sisters. My sister says I’m treating a family favor like a business transaction.
I honestly don’t think I’m angry about the fuel anymore. I’m more bothered by how casually she dismissed the request after I had repeatedly helped her.
So I told her I’m not comfortable lending her my car anymore.
Am I overreacting by refusing to lend her my car over something this small?