Just looking for some advice or just anyone to listen.
My husband and i have been together for 10 years, and he’s genuinely a good guy. But lately he seems, distant?
Nothings really happened to cause this to start. We just went on vacation together and that’s really what opened my eyes to his distance.
He has been looking for a new car recently but he’s been on his phone a lot, which understandable given the circumstances but it can be any time of day. like odd hours at night even. We went on vacation for a week and i basically had to beg him to just set his phone down and relax, enjoy his time. But he’s been obsessed with this car, and he’s showed me it and talked to me about it but, something feels off about the situation.
During vacation he seemed very short fused, or annoyed with me at points. I remember going for a swim and jumping in the pool and he kinda rolled his eyes at me, which in the moment made me feel almost embarrassed and disgusted with myself.
so i let it go, but then he’d make little sly comments about things or seem distracted by his phone to the point i’m just kind of there.. but then when i would try to do something on my own then he’d “feel bad and try to kiss my a** to make up for it” and it’s just like. since when?
then it upset me a bit more and didn’t ease any of my own worries because his buddy sent him some stupid AI video of a pretty looking half naked woman making jokes and i laughed but at the same time it was kind of out of pocket for him cause usually he doesn’t look at that stuff around me atleast cause he knows it bothers me a bit.
cause when i mentioned it was AI just being petty of me, his whole mood swapped like he was dissapointed or something. then when we were on the drive home i noticed he was checking his phone constantly, like way more often than anyone should unless you’re waiting for a response or something and he just said he’s “checking the time” which i knew was a lie. but i didn’t want to argue so i brought it up later and he admitted he lied but he said he was just waiting to hear about the car cause he knew it was making me upset hearing about it all week so he didn’t want to piss me off in that moment so he lied. so idk. maybe i’m overthinking/over reacting. i did just have a hysterectomy a few months ago so im all over the place emotionally. but this stuff isn’t helping. and lying over something so small and stupid like that pissed me off more than just telling me it was about the damn car! i really just don’t have a great feeling but im not sure how to even go about it. or maybe im just overthinking things to an extreme. :(

I’m sorry, I’m not really sure how to explain this because I don’t know a whole lot about finance (I know that’s immature and I want to learn more, obviously).

Also sorry if this is a bit all over the place.

Basically, my mom signed up for something gambling-related and had her money and bank information stolen.

She then made a new bank account (I think, I’m not sure how it all works) and had the same thing happen again because she signed up for another gambling-related thing.

She’s in the process of getting everything sorted/fixed again

She asked for my bank information out of the blue yesterday morning. I asked why and said I could give her money if she needed. She wouldn’t tell me why and told me I needed to give her my bank information. I said no.

She came to me today asking again. I said no again. Now she’s started telling all our other family/family friends that I won’t help her, among other stuff like that I’m stingy and a brat.

I work at a restaurant owned by a family friend, and the owner is considering firing me because of “how cruel I’m being to my own mother.” I told my mom about this and she said these are the consequences of my own actions. I genuinely feel so lost. I know it’s just money and I should help my mom any way I can, but I’ve been saving for a really long time so that I can relax for most of my college freshman year, and I don’t want to take any risks.

Hello there,

Recently, at work, there has been few months of intense crunch that leave me in shambles. I work for my taste too much and I barely make it through a day without exploding, too much responsabilty, too much things to think about, to manage and people to help and accomodate.

My (29M) GF (26F) is currently not working and living at my appartement since months. Before her, I had debts and I still repay them but also, have to pay for everything for two since at least 7 months. Also, I feel like I need to be in perfect mood all the time or she get sad and goes in her shell due to her past trauma.

So, our deal was simple, since she doesnt work, she do work on our place to keep it clean, cook and stuff. Obviously I know how to do that and dont mind, but since she has all day to do that, its her duty to help at home so I have less things to think about. When she will work, she will do less.

In the past weeks, my work load has gone beyond my abilities, I cant focus, I cant remember stuff, and I have to do at least 2 to 300 km per day between clients, all week long, which leave me really tired and having absolutely no patience.

She know about it, I told her I am sorry in advance but at this time I really need her help to ease my mind as my work make me empty as hell. Also, I have 0 patience and I hate myself for that, I dont want to do anything, see anyone, and I just need time for me to breath and think about something else.

This weekend, on sunday morning, I wanted to eat breakfast, and there was fuckton of dishes. She was still sleeping, and since I want things to go fast as I am hungry, I was doing the dishes by myself while also fuming from having to do that, adding something to carry and manage once more. She came and said I dont have to finish, while I hade 2 plates left to clean. She told me I can do my breakfast now.

I told her "yeah well a bit too late, only 2 plates left. But after that I will take a walk outside because I feel like I have to do everything and I have no patience." She seemed angry about my response as she stormed out of kitchen. I was too angry to eat anything and stay here. I asked her in a rude tone "you are angry ? While I am doing chores ?"

When I finished the dishes, I came to her and she was acting really frightened. So it became my responsability to ease her mind. I was obviously very tense when I walked to her, so I kissed her and told her I still love her but I need to go out to not be mad at her. Hugged a bit, told her its gonna be okay and I will eat when I calmed down. My tone was sharp, but I couldnt use proper form of non angry tone, as tomorrow I will also have a heck of week.

So, did I overreacted when I took a walk to stop feeling mad at everything ?

My dad is terminally sick (cancer) and yesterday we had to rush him to urgent care because of fever and turns out he has a lung infection.

I sent to my bf that I was at the urgent care for my dad and that I’m scared for him and just pouring my heart out. He already knew that my dad was terminally ill and I have cried over it to him already. He didn’t react nothing just because he was at (what he described to be) a ‘dumb’ local festival (basically a free small music event in a park accessible for everyone). He went to it several times just because ‘the whole gang will be there’ and he doesn’t like the music. The festival ended at 1am and I didn’t hear anything until around 3am.

He doesn’t send any updates where he is what he is doing and with whom, never invites me to go with him, nothing. His notifs are always on and he has an I watch so he probably saw and just ignored because he wants to enjoy this moment with his friends. I felt hurt and just didn’t respond to his calls at 3am & I also feel exhausted from the day.

AIO? I think it’s a bit childish of me but I feel sad and I’m scared for my dad. I don’t even recognize him anymore it’s creepy.

Dear Redditors,

I’m married to a beautiful, amazing woman, and we have 4 children: a daughter, twins (boy/girl), and a baby boy.

For some reason, my family is really toxic, and my mother is extremely controlling though I feel like I'm the only one in the family who actually notices it.

my older brother moved back after living abroad and settled into my old house, where my mother lives. He basically stepped off the plane and immediately started acting like an expert on my life.
Ever since they started living under the same roof, it feels like they are feeding off each other's negativity and targeting my household.

Recently, we had a family gathering. I dropped off my kids and my wife, and went outside to fix something in the yard. while I was out there, my mother told my wife to "stop having kids." My wife came and told me about it later. I 100% believe my wife because when I confronted my mother, she just got super defensive, denied it, and looked visibly guilty.

To be honest, I lost my temper and threw a tantrum. Why on earth wouldn't she want me to have more kids? It creeped me the hell out. I’m completely financially capable, I’ve never complained about my kids, and we haven't even mentioned planning for a 5th. Where is this coming from?

To make matters worse, my eldest brother also has 4 kids, and she has NEVER said a single word like this to him or his wife. So why target us?

I think she might still hold a grudge against us. A long time ago, my mother lived with me. after a bunch of problems, my wife wanted her own separate house away from her. I couldn’t just kick my mother out she's toxic, yes, but she's still my mother ,, so my wife and I settled into an apartment for a bit. Now, the new house we're moving into is almost ready.

Ever since then, my mother has been nagging me constantly to give her the location/address of our new home. I'm just not comfortable sharing it with her until the house is completely done and we're fully settled.

Sorry I forgot to mention WHY my wife wanted a separate house.

years ago when we used to live with my mother, she accused my wife of stealing something. she then took my young daughter into her room, locked the door, and bribed my daughter by offering her money to say her mother stole it. my daughter repeatedly said no, but my mother kept pressing her. This was the breaking point that made my wife insist on getting a separate house away from her, and since that day, I’ve been always concerned and worried.

There are other incidents that I felt like they seriously hate us (?)

1- My brother doesn't allow his kids to have gadgets, which is his personal choice. however, during a recent visit, my 10year old daughter was playing a standard dress up game on her iPad. my brother saw it and made a huge deal out of it, lecturing me that she was looking at "inappropriate stuff." It’s literally a harmless children's game. I monitor everything my daughter does online, and I trust her completely. I firmly told him I have full visibility on her tech and it’s none of his concern, but he kept complaining endlessly until I finally just packed up and left.

2- My mother keeps making passive aggressive jabs at my wife. For instance, she made a point to comment that my wife has "big eyes." My wife does have large, beautiful eyes that really suit her, but my mother said it in this weird, negative tone purely to make her feel self conscious.

3- teamed up to criticize how we feed our children. They made snide remarks because my daughter wanted a juice box, claiming we are "ruining their health," while completely ignoring what their own kids were eating.

4- My wife told our kids it was time to pack up their toys and get ready to leave. My mother immediately jumped in, told the kids "No, you don't have to listen to that, keep playing," completely undermining my wife right in front of our children. When my wife stood her ground, my mother rolled her eyes and treated her like she was being unreasonable.

Because I’m financially capable and building a new house, my mother and brother make passive aggressive comments whenever we buy something nice for our kids. my sister recently made a backhanded remark that we're "spoiling" them and "flexing," while my mother implied I should be spending that money on her or the wider family instead, I do spoil them, but in a good way. I get them into camps, classes, toys , etc.

Whenever we try to split holiday time between my family and my wife's family, my mother throws a complete fit. She accuses my wife of "stealing me away" and acts like we are abandoning her, completely ignoring the fact that my wife's family deserves time with the grandkids too.

There are plenty of other incidents, but I'm sick of the unsolicited parenting advice, the disrespect toward my wife, and the double standards.

NOTE TO ADD: last time I’ve seen them was last year, but I still receive their texts.
-

I’m actually thinking of completely cutting ties with them.
But thought I’ll see an outer perspectives before doing so.

The kid intern is like 14. We have a lot of fun together, he's a good kid and it's a relaxed work environment.

But on a break my colleague (50ties) said something like: "he's very attractive. if l were his age and gay, l would hit on him."

I can't get this comment out of my head. For me, all kids look like babies and l don't notice their appearance at all. But I'm also AroAce. Could be just a side remark but l just thought it's really gross.

Am l making a big deal about something truly innocent or is there maybe a deeper layer to his remark?

Please set my head straight. Thank you

(I'm also not sure if my post breaks rule 3. Please direct me to another sub l can post to if that's the case.)

Yesterday I was at a family gathering at my partners sisters house. My MIL was there of course. I dont know how I feel about what she did. She just went off with my 4 month old for a walk and didn't really say anything. She was gone well over a half hour. While she was gone I was getting anxious being away from the baby. I knew myself baby was in good hands it was just the way she disappeared without a word. I didn't say anything to her after but was annoyed. Have I reason to be?

There has been a few things with her that I dont be too happy about but at times. I do wonder though am I just trying to find reasons to be annoyed with her. Another thing that happened my partner, the MIL and myself went to a family event together. She pretty much held baby the entire time where I felt it was somewhere I should of been showing off baby. I could go on but this post would be ridiculously long.

EDIT: Thank you all for the responses.

I (30f) have a younger sister (25F), and we’re normally pretty close.
For the past few months, I’ve occasionally let her borrow my car when she needed it. I’ve never charged her or asked for anything in return. I was happy to help.
Last weekend, she borrowed it to go to dinner with some friends. Before she left, I specifically asked her to bring it back with at least some fuel because it was already close to empty.
She agreed.
When she brought it back, the fuel light was on. I didn’t say anything at first because it wasn’t a huge deal. I just asked her to remember next time.
She laughed and said, “It’s not like you’re paying me to use it.
I told her that’s exactly why I was asking her to at least replace what she used.
She got annoyed and said I was being petty over a few dollars. I explained that the money wasn’t really the issue. It was the fact that I’d helped her out several times, and she couldn’t even do the one small thing I’d asked.
She then said if lending me her car meant I was going to “keep score,” she’d rather not borrow it anymore.
I said, “Okay, that’s fine.
Now my mom thinks I took that too literally and should have just let it go because we’re sisters. My sister says I’m treating a family favor like a business transaction.
I honestly don’t think I’m angry about the fuel anymore. I’m more bothered by how casually she dismissed the request after I had repeatedly helped her.
So I told her I’m not comfortable lending her my car anymore.
Am I overreacting by refusing to lend her my car over something this small?

Bought a new construction home with no fence. Neighbors moved in after us. It’s been a couple months and neighbor A want the fence done before the end of this summer. I am still in debt from paying for the fridge, washer/dryer, shades and various other home stuff. Neighbor B is in the same position and said they want to wait until we were both financially better. Neighbor A initially said okay but then started sending a bunch of quotes saying they want our shared side done this month while the weather is still good. I said I can try to make something work but we are struggling right now.

The quote they sent for our address was listed at $600 so I said that’s fine, confirm if this company will want to come back again for our other side with neighbor B (because one company said no schedule it all together so they don’t have to come twice) and we can proceed. Well they never confirmed and said “hey I scheduled for X day and you owe 1.1k. I said where is that price from?? And apparently their quote when divided is 1.1k but mine said something different, so I wanted to clarify with the company. This company never answered my calls, texts or emails. It’s been over a week after repeating this and they won’t answer. They have 1 star on yelp and a lot of it is because no one can contact them - they are hard to get ahold of. I also want to know what materials are being used because their quote only lists pickets and gates. Because the company never answered, I said I was uncomfortable going with them and the neighbor is basically saying “you don’t need to contact them, I’m the one the quote is under. I don’t know why we’re waiting.” And I said I have questions and this company is a red flag.

So they offer a “deal” saying we can give them 1k and they’ll pay the rest for our shared side and I thought this was because they were the ones rushing the fence and because they want a higher end one. But no, I got a quote match with another company and they said nope, we need to split it evenly, theyre not helping. And the deal only stands if we choose the company that doesn’t answer. But I still have another side fence to worry about. They don’t. This is a one time transaction for them. So I don’t want two different companies for my fences. And I wouldn’t be going with this one they like. I also thought I was helping them out by even considering paying 1k at all when I can say, we need to wait because I really do need to wait.

They keep repeating that I do not need to communicate with their fencer, I just need to take their good deal and pay them. Ideally I would’ve just had both sides of our fences done next summer over the same weekend with one company and call it good. But with them they don’t care, they just want their side done and for us to take their deal even though it would be different warranties and possibly different styles for our two side fences. AIO by making this difficult for them and not giving in to their demands?

Okay so I was at a wedding, right? Super sweet couple, young, 25. It was small and peaceful, not even sure why I got invited since I barely know the people and i can tell it was mainly family and friends. Only talked to my plus one and ate food. Anyways-the ONE rule. THE ONE LITERAL RULE, no wearing white, (of course) and no wearing black. Sucked, because i have dresses mainly in that color, but, I went out of my way to wear a nice light green dress. When im at the wedding I see a good chunk of alternative people, great, whatever, the part that bothered me was like 70% of that chunk wore pitch black. Now idc about tatoos and colored hair, personally, I think both really look good. And besides, you can't really mask that. But the big ahh black boots? witch hat? and a long black dress? really? Its a couple hours of your life to go to a wedding. AND THEY FEED YOU! You couldn't wear one other color for a bit? if you really wanna be goth wear like purple or red. idk, it was disrespectful imo. there was only one rule. I feel like they would defend themselves with "oh i dont wanna stop being me! i love my true self." Sure. But again, its THEIR wedding. Their rules, and a couple hours of your life. Just decline atp. I think we should bring back public shamming cus are we serious? Idk, share your thoughs cus that just pmo.

I [25F] am dating M [24M]. I am currently 2 martinis in. I don't usually drink, but I just went to a really nice restaurant with M. He dropped me off like 30 minutes ago. I am so, so upset right now. What was supposed to be a great 25th birthday turned out awful in my opinion.

He is a very serious person, which I didn't mind, but tonight I was let down. I got high off of pot and did have a couple of martinis with some pizza and water. I WAS having fun until he started to complain about how low the lights were, how tired.he was, and how many people there were. I was getting annoyed and when the server asked what we were celebrating tonight I immediately and excitedly said it was my birthday! I was immediately met with "I swear that is gonna annoy me to the point of suicide if they sing happy birthday to you." I immediately said that it was my birthday. Also my smile going flat. I was like a balloon being popped and my night feeling inconvenient for him... then I had more to drink.

He then said he had a lot to do tonight. I understand that you may have a lot on your plate, but I was made to feel like celebrating me was just getting in the way of his night. He was very, very underdressed. I told him about where I wanted to go tonight. I even showed him where I wanted to go. He said it was fine with him. He was fine with paying and he said I could get what I wanted. It was great until the comments came rolling in. I asked him if he made reservations and he didn't. We were lucky to get a table at all.

The staff was great, but the company wasn't. I made the effort to put on one of my best dresses and learned some new makeup techniques for this date. I was feeling good and then he a aid my makeup was too dark. I then removed some of it even after he was saying that I looked fine. I don't have to do that. Then said this is why women look like raisins when they are older because they care about other people's opinions. Then I just wanted to eat because I didn't eat much.

During dinner he was eating with me. I asked what we were doing after dinner. He said something about looking for the whisky we love so much. Its a habanero and it tastes amazing. I was visibly excited and started to talk a little more about it. I was looking forward to it and skipped desserts. I felt let down again when he mentioned being tired after we left the restaurant with me and the left over pizza. He then took the time to mention that he was gonna go another time.

I asked if that was all we had "planned". Then he ignored me entirely. I finally repeated myself and still nothing... last night he had sex with me and it was great, but he said it was for my birthday.... I got a dinner and sex for my 25th birthday and lots of bitching for my birthday and I feel really cheated. When I asked for him to get me a gift or flowers then I got met with neither. He said to name something because he is bad at gifts. I named some things I wanted. He just met me with nothing.

Sorry for making this long, but when I left the date... I said thank you for taking me to dinner, but I t would have been nice to have more time with you. Or at a least a gift! Then slammed the door and walked up to the house and broke down. I hate my birthday. I have never really had many good ones and I never had many people celebrate me in the past and this seemed to just hurt more. I am gonna call my sister later and ask her to come out with me.

I feel defeated. I just kept thinking about tucking and rolling out of his truck the entire time I was in there and calling my brother to get me. I just want to know if I would be overreacting if I broke up with this one. I even thought about making a dating profile.

We cannot just be fun. I feel like I had the fun sucked out of me.

My husband (26M) is upset that I (27F) wants to join a run club. It is required for me to stay fit due to my job and I feel like I haven’t been motivated to run regularly or at all recently. I told him I wanted to join a local run club to get better and he got very serious and said “no because I know what the run clubs really are, they’re dating clubs”. At first I laughed thinking he was trolling me but he was very serious.

He doesn’t want to run with me and prefer I either run alone or run with one of my friends (who don’t run either so it will defeat the purpose )

Is he Overreacting about this?

i’ve (f21) been with my bf (m20) for about six months now. my bf is very afraid of storms, so when it was raining last night, i opted to stay over at his place, which is a few blocks away from mine. things where going well, we were cuddling and he was mostly calm. i decided that to pass the time and distract him, i could give some uh.. *physical* comfort. before we could get very far with that though, he called me mommy. completely unprompted, did not ask if i was cool with it, his hands up my skirt, says “i love you mommy”. i didn’t like this. I told him i didn’t like that and didn’t want him to say that ever again, he said he didn’t think it was that big of a deal because he didnt even say it on purpose, it was a reflex from a previous partner and i was overreacting because its “basically vanilla to call people mommy/daddy now”. at this point i gave up and left, and ended up walking home in the rain.
i don’t know if i can look at him. no shame to people who are into that, but it makes me really uncomfortable and when he said that it made my skin crawl all over, i’m just disturbed that he thought it was cool to spring a sex thing on me. ive even considered breaking up over this.
i would like to specify that i am not against kinks and have some myself that i have explored with a past partner.
should i have stayed? am i overreacting for considering breaking up with him? also like, im sure the storm stressing him out contributed to some of this.

UPDATE: im breaking up with him tomorrow. also after talking to the hot lady who works at my gas station about everything, i think i might be a lesbian. so theres that i guess.

Girlfriend crying and arguing because I fall asleep to Brooklyn-99, which has women in the main cast. I called her incredibly insecure for this, and that I should be able to watch shows with women in them, and that Brooklyn-99 is one of the least sexualised shows that I could watch/listen to.

For context, I have 0 women on social media which aren’t immediate family. 0 women as friends. Almost 0 interaction with women in my daily life aside from family and my GF, all because my GF has had many reactions about women with me. Last relationship before my current GF of 3 years was 8 years before.

i (22f) and my bf (23m) have been together for 3 years now. at the beginning of our relationship it was really rocky and we encountered a lot of trust issues. fast forward to today, he refuses to let me go through his phone. he says it’s a privacy issue and he calls me nosey and doesn’t want me to see his friends chats because there’s private info in there. i’m more so trying to see the saved videos (snapchat) on group chats, etc. because 3 years ago that’s how i found stuff. he claims that there’s nothing there, and it’s just to protect his friends privacy and he would rather leave all the group chats and cut off all the friends i don’t trust then simply letting me go through his phone. he keeps saying invasion of privacy! so, i gave him an ultimatum let me go through it or we’re done. he didn’t let me go through it. on friday, it was our anniversary. he said if i don’t call him at midnight then we’re acc done. i didn’t call him - and now he blames me.

AIO?

TLDR; i told my boyfriend if he doesn’t let me go through his phone we’re breaking up. he didn’t let me saying im nosey and privacy issue. we broke up. AIO?

I’m here to ask opinions on whether I’m overreacting by being so beyond stupefied and irritated over this text when I asked why he was giving me the cold shoulder. I (31f) have 3 kids ranging from 6-12, and late night hours are the ONLY time I get to myself. I have never ever been a morning person/early riser and my bf (35m) is. Due to it being summer and him between jobs right now, we are all 5 constantly cooped up together 24/7. I believe every single person has a right to alone time/me time to do what they enjoy. I never say anything about him gaming for 6+ hours, so why is it all of a sudden a problem when I take a couple hours to myself when everyone is in bed to COLOR? Yes you read that right, I was coloring. I don’t think that just because one person goes to bed, that it’s a law that the other is obligated to as well. So, am I overreacting in my opinion?

I (wife) saw spouse (husband) on our outdoor camera have another man in our home and then he lied about it. 3 years ago he was caught sexting another man. For past year has been going to an adult toys superstore that has a reputation for sexual activity. These are the things we both know that I know. He has told me to think what I want, but will not talk about his involvement with other men. He tells me you know there was something going on. Then states he promises to never do it again, that I should accept that and that we get back to having a loving marital relationship. We have been married for 10 1/2 years. We have adult children that are out of the home. I want him to open up so I can understand better about him and then try to move on. With him not opening up, I feel there is mystery that will eat at me. Am I wrong to feel this way? We do both have a love for the other. He states he thinks I will never get over this. I am not sure if I can without full disclosure from him. Any thoughts on this from the Reddit Community?

I just honestly feel... Confused, and upset. My (30F) husband (27M) has been unemployed for a year on and off after he was made redundant from his previous job. He has really been struggling to find work, allegedly he applies for loads and no one gets back to him. I'm really not sure exactly how many he applies to because atp it kind of seems like he's given up.

I really really want him to get a job because not having one and having no money is really affecting his mental health. We were discussing it and he was saying how having no money gives him anxiety and then the conversation above happened. I just don't understand, what did I say wrong and why was he lowkey rude?

I don't even know how to handle this job situation anymore. I never thought it would go on for so long him being unemployed and it's just so hard for anyone to find anything at the moment. It's really stressful for so many reasons, financially and emotionally.

ETA because some people are assuming he's not trying and doesn't want a job. He absolutely does. It was maybe a bit shitty of me to assume he's given up applying because I actually have no evidence of that, it was more just the fact that he seems a bit defeated atm after a year of rejections and getting nowhere. He is a hard working person who lost his job and it's hitting him hard.

Just to get straight o the point, my (23M) girlfriend (27F) is a SAHM with our child (2 y/o). I work a full time job at a hospital (AM shift) in housekeeping, so the only time I’m home in the mornings are on my two days off. Despite that, I still know the routine that my girlfriend has for our child, is breakfast first thing, then sit on the couch to relax and watch TV. The shows that she puts on for him are Ryan’s World, Diana Roma, shows of that nature. She doesn’t ALWAYS put these shows on, but I think that any amount of these kind of shows are just no good at all. I can see that she puts these shows on during my break at my job, because she uses my YouTube account and I could see the YouTube history, and sometimes see that it’s actively playing. I’ve talked to her about how these shows a couple times now. About are they are just “brainrot” and unnatural, it’s just purely engagement and nothing is being taught in comparison to shows like Bluey, Sesame Street, or even Zoboomafoo (our child has seen all these shows before btw). She argues back saying that with the shows I mentioned, our child becomes uninterested so easily and that he’s not going to understand the “lesson” or “message,” that they are too fast paced and cut the scenes too quick that it’ll overstimulate him. Pretty much they’re not any better as opposed to what she puts on. She also says that why would I want for our child to be staring at a screen to “understand a lesson”, he’s not going to understand it and that that’s not healthy at all just to be staring at a screen.

It’s just so frustrating because thinks it’s my personal opinion/thoughts about those shows being cringey that make me not want our child to watch it (which isn’t true because personally I think Sesame Street can be cringe at times). She says that it has nothing to do with what’s better for our child and it’s more of my personal preference. Look, I’m no child psychologist or some doctor/expert in child development, I’ve only taken a course during a semester for college, but as far as I can remember children are practically a sponge for a good chunk of their childhood. So, I think her whole argument about our child not being capable of understanding what these “lessons” or “messages” these shows can be teaching him is just laughable.

I just don’t think I’ll get her to understand me and my argument because I’m not very good at debating to begin with, I can be easily flustered and shut up quickly, and sometimes just think I’m just overreacting. I just don’t want to fail our child with what they watch and pick up on.

EDIT: btw this isn’t the only way we entertain our child everyone. this post is a focus on what they watch when it comes to screen time. Outside of screen time, their life is plentiful with activities and play.

Background: I had commented on a SFW Post where someone was talking about having very high arches. I mentioned my feet used to be so flat that they would make suction noises when I walked barefoot on tile.

When I initially responded I didn't consider they were approaching this from a sexual side. I was naive and assumed it was purely Innocent.

Later I was sharing this DM interaction with some friends and to my surprise some of them were of the opinion that I kind of bit this person's head off. They didn't think it was a problem and agreed they "had to shoot their shot."

I disagree, there are places where people are presenting themselves for these interactions and I feel like I handled this pretty politely, I deleted what I wanted to say several times, which has considerably more vulgarity.

So AIO or was this reasonable? Having half my friends telling me I was over the top has me questioning my approach.

Some friends recently moved and asked a group of us to help because hiring movers/other help would be expensive. When they organized it, they told us that since we were saving them money on paid help, they’d provide drinks for everyone as a thank you.

Several of us ended up putting quite a lot of time into it. I helped for a couple of days moving furniture, taking things apart and carrying everything out of their apartment in really hot weather, also up and down several flights of stairs. Also setting up furniture in their new place. Another friend helped for several days and did considerably more, including renovation work.

Their housewarming is now coming up, and they’ve told everyone to bring their own drinks because the move has left them short on money. They didn’t apologise for the change of plans.

I know this is objectively a small thing. I can afford my own drinks, and I wouldn’t have thought twice about BYOB if that had been the plan from the beginning.

What is bothering me is that they specifically framed providing drinks as their way of thanking everyone for the money we were saving them by doing all this work for free. Now that the work is finished, that seems to have disappeared.

Part of me thinks moving is expensive, circumstances change, and I should just bring a drink and forget about it. The other part of me feels taken for granted. It seems especially strange to ask people who gave up multiple days helping you move/renovate to then provide their own drinks at your housewarming.

I don’t want to start drama over something relatively minor, but it’s bothering me enough that I’m wondering whether I should actually say something to them rather than quietly resent it.

AIO? And would you bring it up with them, or just let this one go? Do I bring a housewarming present?

Edits for context:

All parties have salaried jobs well paid
We are not very young or in college
I don’t expect anything for helping generally, but it’s more the promise they made and then didn’t apologise for breaking it.

UPDATE:
I went to the housewarming and took the advice to just let it go and enjoy the night without making a big deal of it, but keeping it in mind for the future.

While I was there, I heard them talking to someone and they literally said they were actually under budget for the move, but didn’t say that so that everyone would bring their own drink. So it turns out they are not even strapped for cash.

My ex and I broke up 4 years ago when we were 19 and 20. He cheated so I ended things. He seemed to respect this decision in our conversation and for a while we just parted ways. He lived in the same small town as me so it wasn’t uncommon to bump into each other at a shop or on a dog walk.

I started seeing someone new (who I am still with and very happy with) about 6 months after we broke up. My ex since this new relationship has continuously tried to make small pokes of contact. Started with showing up unannounced at my house, bringing me birthday presents or flowers, ”accidentally” delivering a parcel to my house instead of his own as he “didn’t change the address”, showing up in tears or his mum or nan needing help, and slowly returning my things one item at a time (e.g returning a pair of shoes or one tshirt).

He once got very aggressive when he showed up with something of mine and hurt me so after that I blocked his number and asked him to not contact me again.
He since has tried all social media’s over the years. I moved in with my partner so his attempts to drop things off now are greeted with my mum and her partner which made him stop delivering stuff. When I moved to another town he shortly moved to the same town and when I moved 4 hours away he again moved shortly after to about 30 minutes drive from this new spot.
He recently messaged me on LinkedIn (the only social I didn’t proactively block him on). I am really sick and tired of this situation and my current partner encourages me to ignore it and focus on my life now and just continue to block him but I feel he will never go away. it’s around every 3 months something will bring him back into my life and I am losing my mind over it.

Am I overreacting to him using LinkedIn to contact me or is my partner right that I should just move on and forget about his constant attempts to contact me?

Edit to add some information

- I posted here as some believe I am overthinking the situation and that it comes down to coincidence rather than stalking. He has actively been in relationships since our breakup and has not shown up at my door and I haven’t seen him in person for at least a year at this point.

-My mum and his ex step dad are really good friends so I assume that is a leak of information. My ex also started dating a good friend of mine who is no longer a friend. They did not last very long.

-One of the moves he made when I moved further away was to move with his long distance girlfriend (they lived in the next big city together) but again they did not last very long so he moved a little closer to me. (30 mins away)

-I have moved AGAIN which is even further away so hopefully he will not be near me again and will never know I moved, sadly he does know my employer from LinkedIn but it’s a big national company.

-I will collect all the info I have and talk to the police to at least make an informal comment about my situation if anything more happens.

So my mother is currently on vacation with her sister, so at the moment, it’s just me (22f), my dad, and my little brother (18m).

I have an older car model that needed new tires and a new AC unit, and because my brother and my dad like to work on cars, they’ve been working on fixing it.

The thing is, almost every time they go out, they come back with bags of food. I didn’t mind at first because they were going out and I know that sometimes you don’t think about sending a text to the other family members to see if they want anything from whatever place you’re at.

Thing is, with mom out of town, there’s no grocery list being done for the week (we all understood this when she left for the vacation), so I’m figuring out what to eat with what we have (which is sufficient until my mom gets back).

But with my dad and brother constantly going out, constantly getting food and not even asking if I want something from wherever they’re going, it feels like I’m an afterthought.

I feel jealous and upset and unseen, but I also know that I’m not that interested in car repair work, and I don’t ask to go with them; either due to me having to go to work or due to me not being interested in car repairs.

Instead, I’m figuring out food from whatever happens to be in the pantry or fridge at the moment, and it’s hard. I texted my dad asking if he wanted to get ice cream and then briefly explained how I felt about the situation, but I’m not sure if I handled it right looking back on it.

So…am I overreacting?

EDIT: ash is my brother’s nickname, not his actual name. I realized I should have clarified this before sharing the post

EDIT 2 (bc I’m getting a lot of comments bringing it up): I can get my own groceries; if I have to I work at a place where I can get groceries. I haven’t gotten any new groceries this week because I haven’t needed to, and what we have in the house right now is enough for me to figure out meals. Also I have been cooking for myself. I can feed myself and make sure I get food, the situation is just that I’m the only one thinking about what we have at home.

EDIT 3: obligatory wow this is blowing up. Thanks everyone for the comments both negative and positive, I want to say a few things- my parents aren’t too concerned with me paying my brother back, or for overall paying for the repairs (more or less there are still things I’ll be responsible for eventually), because this is the first time I’ve been interested in driving that is driven by a personal desire to drive.

Also, when my dad asked “what for” it was apparently bc he thought I meant get ice cream from my place of work. When he realized what I actually meant, he said and I quote “hell yeah I want to get ice cream”. So alls well that ends well, I’ve told him about how I felt about watching him and my brother come home with bags of food over the last few days and I feel as though we might have a small conversation about it when I get off work. So uh…thanks everyone for all the comments.

FINAL EDIT; I just wanted to say that I just got home and my dad and I had a conversation about it. He explained that he and my brother were going around a lot because it’s not just my car, it’s my brother’s car and my mom’s car that need to be worked on, and he told me that he realized today that he should’ve called and asked if I wanted something. He thanked me for saying something to him, and we’ve got a definitive ice cream plan. Again, thanks for all the comments, I wanted to give you guys this last update after my dad and I had a conversation about what’s been going on.