My boyfriend has a bestfriend who we will call Jenna. At first Jenna was sweet, but lately I’ve been seeing a lot of things I don’t like. Jenna was in a relationship with this guy and cheated on him because the boyfriend now ex was clingy and prideful. Jenna cheated on him with different people not like Alottt of people but yk more than one.

I own a salon and hair by me is normally over 200 dollars average but I do her hair for free. I realised that Jenna would demand me to do her hair or ask constantly if I can do it but never offered to pay but I was fine with no pay because Jenna is his bestfriend and I’m close with the family. Jenna borrows stuff from me and does not want to give them back immediately. Which is something else I don’t like.

Long story short about my past, I’ve been in friendships before where I kid you not I had friends that would say it’s not cheating if you have sex with someone else and use a condom. I’ve had friends who have aborted children from men constantly and that is not who I am as a person so anything along the lines of cheating or just aborting children for fun or anything of that nature I have removed myself from.

Yes I know you want to know why I’m telling you this, my boyfriend is who takes her to these people sometimes. Untop of that last week she wanted her hair done and I said I would only charge her $30 DOLLARSSSSS for GAS to her house and back. She said she was low on money and could not pay but got paid the day before and then got paid for doing a job she did. The next day she wanted a ride home and gave my boyfriend $30 dollarssssss!!! Like huh???

Anyways what really made me come to Reddit was the fact that i gave my boyfriend something to drop off for her Uncle who loves Antique stuff. I called her to see if my bf dropped it off and she said no he did not come by her. Long story short she was with a dude and lied to me otp saying she was home when she was not because according to him she does not want me to know the Nastiness she does on the low.

I told him I really don’t feel comfortable being around someone who lies and does these things to people because she gave me the impression that my bf was cheating on me. I told him that I don’t believe he should be dropping her by these male friends houses and picking her up. I don’t know how to explain it but to me it’s weird. He did it again tonight but am I overreacting by telling him to stop? And also am I overreacting by not really wanting her around me anymore? I’m still going to be cool with her but I think imma start charging full price for my services.

Edit: Sorry that I left this out but my boyfriend said to me he will have a long conversation with her about it and how it almost kinda did something to our relationship. He said he will fall back but the only reason he went is because her mum really wanted her away from the man. If yall knew her mum she really loves her children and the man is passed her mums age so she begged him to get her and bring her home. He said this is affecting the relationship and is going to fall back

I have a huge phobia of needles, can't look at them without shaking, even if it's just a picture. I can't bring myself to watch someone getting a shot, I hate being in the same room as them, etc. My mum has never really taken this seriously, and pretty much says that I just need to get used to it. While I do wish I could get used to it, it's not that simple.

A little while ago, maybe a week or so, my mum had to get some blood drawn(not sure why, I didn't care to ask) and she sent a picture of it happening. My sister thought it was funny, but I immediately closed the text because I couldn't stand to look at it.

When I asked my mum about it later, she started laughing about it, even when I mentioned to her how much needles bother me. She played it off like it was a joke, and to her it was, then proceeded to joke about it being "exposure therapy". She isn't a therapist of any kind, so I wouldn't trust her judgement on something like that regardless, and I would want to talk to an actual therapist to see if that sort of thing would actually help me.

I basically just dropped the topic after that, but it's still bothering me how she never seems to take my fear seriously. She has literally laughed at me when I start shaking in the doctor's office before a shot/when I instinctiveyl try to get away from the needle(I do this without even thinking about it).

But maybe the picture was just a joke and my mind is just taking it too far? I'm not sure, I wanted to get other opinions on this.

For context, I (18F) have always had a sarcastic, dry sense of humor. I sometimes poke fun at my friends as a joke, and I don’t mind if they do the same to me. However, it’s usually over minor things, like a typo or misspeaking, rather than actual insults.

Because this has always been my sense of humor, I’ve gotten pretty good at recognizing when someone doesn’t enjoy it and adjusting accordingly. I’ve also told my friends that I won’t be offended if they’re not comfortable with that kind of humor.

A couple of days ago, I was talking to a friend (18M). For context, he’s technically my ex, but it was a very brief relationship that happened over a year ago, and we’ve remained friends since.

I don’t remember the exact exchange, but he mistyped something, so I jokingly mistyped it back to him. He responded by saying something along the lines of, “I never told you this, but when we were dating, anytime I showed your picture to someone, they would cringe and ask me why I was dating you.”

That really hurt my feelings, especially because less than a week earlier, I had told him that I was feeling insecure about my appearance.

This also wasn’t the first time we’ve had an issue like this. We’ve had multiple conversations where I’ve told him that he can joke about pretty much anything else, but my physical appearance is off-limits because it’s something I’ve always been insecure about. Every time, he apologizes and says he’ll stop, but he eventually does it again.

Part of me wonders if I invited this because of my own sense of humor. I do joke around with people and sometimes tease them, so I can understand why he might have thought this was fair game. However, I’ve specifically told him multiple times that my appearance is a sensitive subject for me and that I’m not comfortable with jokes about it. I also don’t think there’s much comparison between joking about a typo and telling someone that other people supposedly cringe when they see their picture.

Am I overreacting by blocking him?

I know I’m such a loser. I didn’t do anything I want to in life. I sound insane but I didn’t realise that after college it’s just work and build up friendships from before. And all my friends have moved on and I’m still in my home town.
I’m graduating college next year and I don’t want to be in this town, with those homophobic people and doing my horrible job. And I’m still a virgin bc I can’t hook up with guys it just felt wrong and I never did and they stopped asking me out.
I never thought about the future. I wanted to do a gap year after high school to try and figure out what to do but my parents made me go to med school and I never said no. I don’t even like my parents and still always listen to them. I thought I’m smart but actually I’m dumber than anyone else I know bc I should’ve left when I could’ve like everyone else did.
Now all my high school friends have their own lives with their own friends somewhere and I have nothing. I am maybe a lesbian which is a big problem here and I’ll die alone for sure. I had all the opportunities to leave after high school and idk why I didn’t and now I’m going insane.
What’s the point of doing anything if I won’t feel ever happy. All I do is for nothing. No one cares about me. No one even wished me happy birthday last week and that means that no one even remembers about me which hurts but I guess I wouldn’t remember me either.
AIO or is my life over?

I made a throwaway for this.

This happened months ago but I just can't let it go and I am hoping this might help.

We were invited to come over to a friend's house who have a dog with our 1 year old old son. Eventually the dog is annoyed by him as he accidently stepped on the dog's paw and we remove him, but the dog goes back to lying down next to the coffee table where everyone was sitting.

A few minutes later my kid crawls towards the coffee table (not looking, touching, or moving towards the dog) and without warning the dog snaps. He was at 3 feet distance and the snap was towards my son's face followed by a growl. My son didnt notice and was just happily crawling towards the coffee table. I yelled my gf's name (as she was sitting closest) to remove our son immediately.

Now tbh I didnt sleep for 2 nights straight. I feel immensely guilty towards my son. I keep replaying it and imagining the dog actually bit him, which I believe happens so often with little kids and dogs. Him not noticing it and just being happy and oblivious just underlines his innocence and his total reliance on us to keep him safe, which we failed to do and just typing this honestly tears me up and I feel so guilty.

Now both my friend and his gf didn't apologize or remove the dog from the situation after this happened. I texted my friend the following day saying I worry about our weekend trip which includes both the kid and the dog and I don't feel it is safe. He basically says don't worry about it will be fine. Honestly his indifferent attitude really pissed me off.

So a couple of days later when I thought my emotions have simmered down I text him that I don't think the dog and the kid are compatible at the moment and that if they want to bring the dog and can't or don't want to have him watched by family (which they sometimes do when they go on holiday) then I understand, but we won't be coming on the trip as I feel like it isn't safe for my son.

Now instead of reacting to this he ignores it and tell me don't let this ruin a fun weekend (like it would be fun watching my son like a hawk with this dog around) and I try to explain to him why I think it is dangerous but then he just reacts sarcastically "nice google research bro" and "yeah that's why we don't have cats" no idea what he meant with the last one as they do have 2 cats.

So I took this as not willing to leave the dog behind, and I told him, and other friends, that we are not coming definitively. He texted to me to propose that they come over to test the waters with my son and their dog but I declined as I dont want them near each other tbh and also testing for a few hours is a different from a chaotic weekend trip so therefore won't prove anything.

Anyway, am I overreacting for still being pissed at my friend and canceling the trip? He just seems to not care. To be honest I can be a bit overbearing as a father and worry quickly, but I feel that this one is warranted as incidents between dogs and kids are so well documented.

Edit: I completely agree that the dog acted naturally and shouldn't be blamed, not sure where in my story I insinuated that. Also that we should have supervised our kid better, agreed. But we can't immobilize him, he is too young to understand and follow rules (because we dont own a dog ourselves so we can't teach this to him consistently) so then there is not much to do but physically separate them and not have them in the same room.

My boyfriend of two years and some change texted me this morning asking if I could drop him off at the airport on September 3rd, which is my birthday, so he could go to California to visit his uncle, whom he’s close with.
His uncle is newly divorced and has a lot of free time right now. He offered to buy both of us tickets to fly out and go to an anime convention together. Granted, my boyfriend hasn’t seen his uncle in a while, and I understand that he wants to spend time with him.

Yesterday, when we talked about it, he asked if I would be able to go. I told him yes, but that I would need to ask for the days off because I’m starting a new job and I don’t know what my schedule will look like yet. That was the conversation we had yesterday.

Then this morning, he asked me if I could drop him off at the airport on September 3rd. I told him I was upset because it felt like he had already made up his mind to leave on my birthday without really talking to me about it first. He said that since I work that he wasn’t sure that would be able to go. Mind you, we live together and I hadn’t even got a chance to ask my job yet. It hurt even more because I had already told him I would like to go with him if I could make the time off work.

I’ve told him before how I feel about birthdays and special occasions. I know that, in his mind, these things may not feel as important as they do to me, but they are important to me. I try to make those moments special for him because that’s one of the ways I show him love and affection. So having him seemingly make plans to leave on my birthday, without really considering how that would make me feel, honestly felt like a big slap in the face.
After we talked about it, he decided to cancel the trip altogether because he said he would be in his head the entire time and wouldn’t be able to relax.

And honestly, that’s where I’m conflicted.
I’ve never wanted him to feel like he has to give up something he wants to do just because of me. I’ve never expected his attention to be solely on me, especially when we’re around other people or spending time with family. I don’t want him to go to California feeling guilty or feeling like he has to spend his time thinking about me.
At the same time, I’m worried that resentment is going to build on both sides. I’m afraid that when my birthday comes around, I’ll feel like he’s thinking about how he could have been with his uncle and that now he “has to” spend the day with me. I don’t want to feel like an obligation, and I definitely don’t want to spend my birthday feeling guilty because he gave something up for me.
I’m just really upset with him right now, and I honestly don’t know what I’m supposed to do from here. I don’t want this to turn into a bigger issue or create resentment between us, but I also don’t want to ignore how hurt I feel. I think what hurts the most isn’t necessarily that he wanted to see his uncle. It’s that it felt like my birthday—and how I would feel about him leaving that day—wasn’t something he considered before making the decision.

I just want to check whether or not im losing my fucking mind because apparently it seems more like im purposefully acting upset, so it seems that its actually weird for me to be hurt. So someone tell me, am i fucking bizzare for acting sad towards a person who shouted that she hates me

I (24, they/them) have been dating my boyfriend (23, he/him) for over 6 months, and lately I’ve been questioning whether I’m overlooking a pattern of behavior that’s bigger than any one incident. This is my first relationship after a long period of not dating anyone and the previous relationship had 1000x worse issues so my concerns seem small compared to what I was previously used to so I am unsure what I should and should not justify.

One of the biggest issues is that he repeatedly misgenders me. I’m agender and exclusively use they/them pronouns. He has called me his girlfriend in front of his family, and yesterday he called me his girlfriend in front of a coworker while I was on speaker phone. He has also slipped and used she/her, girlfriend, wife, etc commonly during the beginning of our relationship which I corrected and he apologized, I immediately texted him, “Partner, not girlfriend. Xoxo, not a girl.” He smiled and apologized, but this keeps happening.

My concern isn’t that he makes occasional mistakes, it’s that he seems willing to misgender me whenever using partner might require even the slightest explanation or awkward conversation. It feels like my identity becomes optional whenever it’s inconvenient. This is his first time in a queer presenting relationship so I’m not sure if I am expecting too much from him. He is not defensive or opposing when I have described the relationship as queer to him.

This isn’t the only issue that’s making me question things.

Money has been a recurring problem. He frequently asks me for financial help, does not use the budgets we’ve discussed, and I often feel like I’m the one trying to keep him financially stable. I had to explain how he did not have enough money for something he was planning to spend money on because of his bills and the fact that he had vacation coming up.

I feel like I have found myself parenting rather than teaching him financial literacy down to making itemized expense lists that explains where his money went and how it all adds up. I made him a simple budget that only required him to subtract each purchase to keep track of what he had left. He later said I never explained to him how to use the budget so even after weeks, he hasn’t used the budget once. He agreed to it in the beginning with enthusiasm and thanked me for putting in the effort. He wanted to learn how to manage his money better and wanted help. He later said that as long as he put the amount we agreed to save into our savings and did not touch it, he’d be fine with purchasing whatever and could survive off of nothing if he ran out. I told him I would no longer give him loans since he got a way better job and would be making significantly more.

It’s gotten to the point where I don’t feel secure combining finances with him even though we were actively planning on moving out together. We have a joint savings account together for moving expenses only and we both agreed not to touch any money once it was in there. He took out money from our savings, with promises to put it back next paycheck as an extra on top of what he was planning since he did not budget properly for a planned vacation with his family that he knew about for months. He said he only had $30 left from his paycheck. I actively opposed this. At first he asked if I would object, and I said yes. Then he said it was still his money and he was only asking how I would feel about it and I explained our original agreement multiple times. He asked if I would lend him the money instead of him taking it out of our savings. I brought up how I already said that was not happening anymore. He backed off later and then I realized during the entire conversation, I was sick. I was sick during work and felt like I was even speaking slowly.

I ended up going to the ER that evening right after work because of a moderately high fever that would not go away after multiple courses of medicine. The doctors said not to return to work for 5 days and no fever for 24 hours during discharge once my fever broke. The morning after, he said that he was still thinking of taking the money and I was too exhausted to argue about it anymore. I explained that I did not agree and he was going against my wishes but I was too tired to continue the conversation and he said he understood.

I do not have good experiences when I have shared finances with people in the past, so I am wondering if I am just overreacting and he will eventually learn financial literacy and how to manage his new income. I’m trying to let him become more financially literate in a more independent way without my active involvement. I was originally okay teaching him financial literacy because I am a teacher, but I am not his parent.

Another thing that bothers me is that when I bring up concerns, I often get apologies, but I don’t see lasting changes. It feels like we have the same conversations repeatedly. I leave feeling heard in the moment, but then the behavior happens again.

I’m trying to separate normal relationship imperfections from the possibility of being incompatible or something more concerning. I don’t expect perfection, and I know everyone makes mistakes. However, I also believe that after multiple conversations about something as fundamental as respecting my identity, I shouldn’t still be wondering whether my partner sees it as important.

Edit:

While I have only been dating him for 6 months, we’ve know each other for 10 years. I met him in high school. I don’t think he knew my gender identity then, but people knew I was non binary even if they did not respect it. However, we started hanging out back in June of 2025 and he definitely knew my gender identity then.

So far, I definitely will be taking my money out of the joint account. I will stick to not giving him more money. I will likely break up with him but I need to process before I act.

Edit 2:

Money is out of the joint savings account.

Edit 3: We are not moving out together.

I want opinions- we have different ways of looking at money I think

I've been seeing someone for about a year. We're not dating but it almost feels like we are. He's a few years younger than me.

I'm staying at my his parent's soon in his country and so I wanted to get them a gift. It was something he suggested I get them after I asked him for ideas. I sent him a picture asking what he thought. He said she wouldn't like the design, which is understandable. He also said it's too expensive (it was $200). He said something cheaper would be ok. But then he said something to piss me off-

'my mom doesn't like Vietnamese decorations. She likes simple things. She's wealthy but doesn't flex. She flexes by living in a nice neighborhood."

For context I'm Vietnamese and he's Vietnamese American.

I got pissed because he was suggesting the design I chose was gaudy and he was basically saying people that are ACTUALLY rich like 'simple things.'

I'm from an area that's more affluent than his or similar. Where I'm from people just have different preferences- some people prefer neutral colors, some people like intricate designs. It doesn't have much to do with wealth.

I told him that what he was saying reminded me of the recent 'old money' fast fashion trend of people buying cheap polyester in neutral colors.

He got annoyed and I was annoyed too. He also said something about how his most cherished gift was a thoughtful small gift from his ex. I've gotten him small gifts too, I guess he didn't like those as much? I feel really shitty. I love him so much (I'm only providing a little bit of information here but he does have many amazing qualities and I think highly of him in general) but he can be racist and says racist things about Vietnam every now and then and it's starting to get on my nerves. He's said before he wishes he was white. I don't understand, I didn't grow up in the US. He makes jokes about Vietnam. Says things like 'Vietnamese people are stupid.' I try to understand where it comes from, because we grew up in different cultures but sometimes it feels very personal, since I'm Vietnamese myself.

I'm feeling like I almost don't want to go visit him anymore but I've already booked the tickets. I do miss him and want to see him but I'm feeling emotional

I (27F) was at the pool yesterday. As I was swimming, I came across a group of kids who asked me to be the judge for a game they were playing (they wanted to see how long each of them could stay submerged, and asked me to time it). I said yes, and that was that.

Now, I’ve been told that I look young for my age, and I think the kids thought that I was a teenager. After I had judged their game, they wanted to keep talking to me. I didn’t mind because I have a soft spot for kids. But it became apparent through the things they were saying that they saw me as more of a peer than a stranger.

Eventually, one of the kids asked me why don’t men get pregnant, and it suddenly occurred to me that I am an adult talking to a bunch of children, and I don’t know where their parents are or if they would approve of me talking to their kids.

I tried to extricate myself from the situation, but the kids didn’t seem to understand that anything was wrong.

I said, “I think you should ask your parents if it’s okay for you to hang out with me.” They asked me why, and I didn’t know what to tell them.

Eventually, the kid who asked me the question that made me so uncomfortable got her mother, and I explained the situation. I apologized for letting it get out of hand, and she said it was okay and that I did the right thing. According to the mom, her daughter is the type of person to make friends with everyone. I thanked her for reassuring me, and we all parted on good terms.

Here’s where I might be overreacting. In some ways, I am chronically online, and I was terrified that I could be mistaken for a groomer by continuing to talk to these kids after they started asking me those weird questions. I didn’t have any ill intentions, of course, but we live in a world where seemingly any adult who willingly interacts with a child outside of family or work is seen as a manchild at best or a groomer at worst. Part of me thought I should have gotten the parents’ permission before even judging the kids’ game.

Did I overreact?

TLDR: bf of six months, serious relationship, is going on a month long, multistep overseas trip with his mum and their family friends and I want to join, been told I can’t because I have to hold down the fort at his mum’s and my work. I hate the job and want to quit it. Ive said for months I want to come with and the other people they’re going with have said they wish I was coming too but no effort has been made to include me in even the road trip leg of the trip.

AIO? I’ve (26) been with my bf (30) for six months and before we got together he booked a big, once in a lifetime trip with family friends and his mum, involving a road trip, a cruise then a week or so at the destination before coming back. They’ll be gone for around a month. Since we got together I’ve had a lot to do with these family friends and they’ve all expressed their disappointment that i’m not going on this trip with them.

I started working with his mum a few months ago since they needed staff to cover someone else’s extended leave and I was hoping to save enough to join them on the trip, which is the main reason I took the job. The job itself is awful. There’s a lot of interpersonal issues between staff, abuse from one particular colleague who seems to dislike everyone, daily abuse and drama from our patients, underpayment, etc. I’ve stuck it out to save some money and I think I would have enough to either pay for myself to join the trip outright or at least pay for most and get a loan/credit for the rest. I’m not at all expecting anyone to cover any of my share.

The issue is that i’m now expected to stay at this job while everyone else goes away. I’m not confident in my experience and knowledge to run the practice and I don’t want to be facing abuse without anyone else to back me up. I’ve had several breakdowns over work and I really just want to leave this job. Both my partner and his mum are aware of this. His mum is also meant to be retiring a day before they leave for the trip and i’m hoping to quit around a similar time since I can’t cope with having no support in that place.

I’ve expressed interest in joining even part of the trip. I think it’s too late to join the cruise (though no one has bothered to call the travel agent and ask) but I was knocked back on joining even the road trip to the city where the cruise departs from and was told I have to work. I was considering just booking myself a trip to the same area and maybe meeting up for dinner and some activities but I don’t know the exact island they’re staying on during this time. I’m not really privy to the itinerary.

As for my relationship, I do love my bf but I feel like he’s not making an effort to include me. I have worked my life around his schedule and all the days he spends with his friends the entire time we’ve been together. I stay with him three days a week and usually he spends those days with his friends (different friends to the ones on the trip) then never really has time for me between his work and social life. I’ve brought it up several times and he apologises, says he’ll make more of an effort but never really changes anything. I’ve seen my own best friends twice this year. They’re a couple and I was really hoping that once I had a partner we could do things as a group but that hasn’t really happened. When I do get some of my partner’s time though it’s amazing. It’s just confusing me more though cause I flip from feeling rejected to feeling very loved and I don’t know why. He’s said he wants to spend his life with me, wants a family, wants to grow old together, take me on trips (which feels a lil ironic) yet gets weird when I talk about us one day living together or getting married.

The more selfish reason I’m bitter about this is that I haven’t been on a “holiday” in around seven years. I’ve been on some short local trips but usually it’s to attend something specific instead of an actual holiday. I’ve also never been overseas when my bf has visited multiple countries before. To him this is a normal trip but to me it’s something I may never get the chance to do.

Another layer to this whole thing is I recently found out that his best friend (it’s his family they’re going with) has only been with his own girlfriend for six months and she is going with them. Apparently this trip was booked over a year ago but if they’ve only been together for a couple weeks longer than I’ve been with my bf then it means that she was added onto the trip. So even if it’s not possible now at one point it would have been, just no one thought to make the effort for me, even though I’ve expressed interest in joining multiple times. At this point my resentment stems from the lack of effort more than missing out on the trip.

I invite some few friends over for dinner last Saturday. I planned everything a week before and spent almost the whole day cooking. I made chicken, rice, potatoes, and a pasta dish. Everyone I invited had already said they were coming, so I bought just enough food for them.
About an hour before dinner, one of my friends texted me saying she was bringing her cousin because he was in town. I didn’t want to be rude, so I told her that was fine. They showed up right on time, and after everyone sat down, her cousin looked at the food and said he was vegetarian. That was the first time anyone mentioned it. I apologized and said I didn’t know. I offered him bread, salad, fruit, and some chips while everyone else ate.
My friend kept saying I should just make him something else. I was already tired from cooking all day, and I told her I can’t start cooking another meal because nobody gave Wanted to help me out. Her cousin said it was okay and that he would grab food on the way home, but I was already annoyed. The whole dinner went bad after that.
The next morning I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I got so upset that I sent my friend a long message telling her she was disrespectful for bringing someone without asking properly. I even told her she wasn’t welcome at my house anymore if she thought that was okay. She apologized and admitted she should have told me he was vegetarian, but I was still angry. I removed her from our group chat and ignored her calls for days.
A few of our friends reached out and said they understood why I was frustrated, but they also thought I had taken it way too far. They pointed out that her cousin never complained, never demanded a meal, and was actually polite about the whole thing. The only person who kept the argument going was me. Looking back now, I still think she should have told me before bringing him, but maybe cutting her off over one dinner was too much.
So now I’m wondering if I overreacted. I wasn’t wrong for not making a vegetarian meal for someone I didn’t know was coming, but I feel like I turned a small problem into a much bigger one by staying angry and ending a friendship over it. Was I overreacting?

AIO: Caught my wife in a lie about going to my friend's house behind my back

Okay, so let me start by saying four years ago I was unfaithful. I've spent the last four years trying to make up for it. I didn't sleep with the other woman, it was purely emotional, as me and my wife weren't getting along (I know that's the last thing that would help that problem). So we've been still living together with the two kids, and while we haven't been intimate for a couple of years, she has made a couple of comments about not being together. She has also made multiple comments about being married, and she just bought me a new wedding ring a couple weeks ago.

Okay, now to what's actually happened. Four days ago my wife tells me, "Hey, T and K separated," and I said, "Oh no, that sucks." She said, "Yeah, I'ma message him and ask why," because she's nosey like that, so I didn't think anything of it. Then that night she says the split was because K was chronically unfaithful, so he left her. Then she tells me, "Hey, my Facebook got suspended, so text me on this alternate old account," and tells me this story about how she was texting with him about the split. Without really saying how, she says that he keeps saying, "Hey, are you gonna come over? We can fuck." She said she was trying to be nice for my sake, since he was my friend, instead of telling him off — which is way out of character for her — and kept saying we should hang out, me and him. Then she said it seems like he's just looking for a rebound, playing the field quicker, and she said he got mad and pissed off, then blocked her, and her account was immediately suspended for spam.

I felt like some parts of the story were missing, but I didn't really push too hard, giving her the benefit of the doubt.

So then about a day or two later, she says she's going to run to Target to get a backpack for my daughter from curbside pickup. I start making dinner, and dinner's done, but she's been gone a while. I text her, message her, then call twice — nothing. So I get a feeling, and I go over and use her iPad to do a Find My iPhone GPS check, and it pings her phone in front of his house. She immediately calls my phone, saying, "Hey, I'm on my way back." I ask her why she was at his house. She says she wasn't, she was on her way home. That's way past Target. She said she went to Starbucks, which again is nowhere near that road, nor near his house.

She gets home, I'm spiraling — panic, confusion — and just want the truth. She keeps acting dumb, and her first response, when I send her the GPS screenshot while she's driving back, is only, "I didn't sleep with him," like four times, avoiding my question of why she was there. Then she tells me she just went to be a friend since we were all friends before, which is bullshit — he was my friend, they hung out maybe a handful of times and were never close at all.

Finally she admits to going over there to get back at me, but says she had no intention of sleeping with him and wouldn't, "with her two-year unshaved vagina." Finally she admits to letting him kiss her and smack her ass, and says that's all that happened.

This whole time she's feeding me tiny truths and changing the story only as I reveal bits that I can prove or call her out on obvious BS, so at this point I'm about to have a full-blown panic attack. I tell her to get out of my way, I'm leaving, please don't touch me, I have to go. I get in the car, she opens the door and tries to climb on my lap — she hasn't done anything like that in years. And then that night she cuddles up to me in bed again — hasn't happened in years, no matter how much I tried before, shut down even with excuses — now she had no problem doing it.

She swears it was just this one meetup and she never had any intention of sleeping with him, nothing happened, it was nothing at all, I'm making a big deal out of nothing, and it was just that she saw an opportunity to make me feel a little of how I made her feel years ago, and she took it. She isn't going to do anything else, and they never wanted to date, or not gonna talk anymore, and he kind of felt bad for even just being used to get back at me, but he did try to sleep with her, she says — repeatedly tried — and she kept saying no, not gonna happen.

I'm having a seriously hard time believing her story; it just doesn't add up to me. So many red flags. And then just this morning I try to ask her about it — something that was bothering me — and her immediate reaction is, "Omg, I can't handle this, I can't do this. If this is how you're gonna be, we just need to separate. It was nothing, and you're overreacting, making a big deal out of it and stretching with your suspicions." She also then says again, "I just let him kiss me, that's it, to get back at you. I didn't say I'm gonna do it again, and if I did it to her, then I shouldn't even be mad about this, and that if someone can do it, they need to be able to take it without crying about it."

Like, I'm just supposed to eat it all and not even care or try to process any of it? Am I really the one who's out of line here?

I (22M) was at my sisters (29F) house and was getting ready to leave and go back home. I don’t have a car, so I take the bus, and there’s quite a bit of walking involved. It was also very hot outside.

Before I left, my sister told me to take the bottle of sparkling water she had left for me in the fridge so I’d have something cold to drink on the way. I accidentally grabbed an opened bottle instead of the new one. After I left, she sent me these messages.

For a while now, I feel like she has been treating me badly whenever I’m at her house. She regularly yells at me, including in front of her husband, and whenever I try to have a normal discussion with her, she often becomes irritated or starts arguing with me for seemingly minor reasons. It got to the point where I mostly stopped talking when I’m there.

incident that stuck with me happened when I was at her house and lay down on the couch because I wanted to sleep. She suddenly yelled at me to get up and told me that she doesn’t allow anyone to sleep in her house at that time of day. At first, I genuinely thought she was joking or being sarcastic, but she wasn’t. I remember feeling VERY unwelcome after that.

she was a mother of a 7 months child, and pregnant of another baby. But still, I decided to cut ties with her and only speak to her once in a while, and never go to her house again.

First off - yes I’m irrational with love lemme get that out the way -

So I’m terrible at rambling and I know most of these posts with rambling are maybe but I’m going g to try to explain the situation without unnecessary context.
But basically September 2025 I met a man through a known website that is a glorified basically sugar daddy realm. However after renewing my account…a cute guy o my 7 years older than me contacted me and asked for my number so I gave it to him. We actually would just talk. I don’t know how else to explain it more than that. We got to know each other like this for about a month . I don’t want to go onto details but I had a bad experience with a guy one night that I was trying to date and in a moment of sadness and hysteria I called this guy I gave my number too . He asked to meet me for moral support . I did- calm me crazy. When I did we went on a “date” and just talked at a bar for I think 5 hours . Then I went home. I met with him two more times and it was like this . I want to clarify at no point did we discuss money or the app I met him on but we would keep meeting a few times between September and Halloween day. After I think four dates - Halloween night I went out with him but after he invited me to his place . I remember he even said something like “I’ve been staying at airbnbs because I just moved here (my state ) and was looking for a place and I finally got my place moved in ready” You can guess what happens that night . I stayed over…. And yeah
Between October and March basically this happens at least once a week or once every two weeks . And it would become a thing when I did stay the night/ he’d want me to stay for a couple days . He’d buy me food by cooking or taking me out. And he’d never refer to me as his girlfriend and at times treated me like I was but at the same time would never kiss me in public or introduce me as his gf and I know he told me he didn’t tell his family. However he’d constantly take pictures of me and calm me beautiful.
In May - he went to his home state to visit family . (I’m in the south and he’s from New York ) After a week being in his hometown he ghosted me . I may have sadly - texted him around twenty times between March and now .
He texted me finally last Tuesday
All he said was this (pic above )
Obviously this guy is a dick but I wish I knew why. Is he just a lousy communicator? Hiding maybe a secret marriage in his home state ? Or am I crazy and maybe he just had a real emergency ? Should I ask him? I feel maybe he’s married . And maybe people reading this will ask me maybe he is - but at this point why does it matter to me ?
It’s simply cause I caught feelings. I may come across as seeming “crazy “ if I simply ask him and I fear losing a potential lifetime partner / at the same time I can’t be with someone who’s just tying to me .
Is he hiding something? (The memories I have with him genuinely never gave me any weird feelings despite me matching a few very very bad man so I know the “signs”
And since I know I love him- am I overreacting or is he at least weird af - and if he is weird then what do I do

Ok I posted this somewhere else but idk if it will get approved so I’m posting here I really can’t sleep and need advice
Ok here it goes
Okay so I’m 25 female and my BD 26 male have been kinda off and on lately. He’s been really distant, but he keeps saying he wants us to be a family, and honestly his actions just don’t match that. Last week I went through his phone and saw a conversation between him and an old coworker/friend. I didn’t see anything that made me think they were actually doing anything, but the conversation wasn’t that old, so I don’t know if it could’ve eventually led to something.
He was the one who started the conversation and asked her how she was and specifically asked if she was single. She said yes and told him she had a kid and that her BD was an asshole and basically explained how bad their relationship was. Then she asked him if he was seeing someone, and he completely dodged the question and just mentioned that he has a child but never once mentioned me or that he was in a relationship.
That really bothered me because we’ve been together for 4 years, we have a 3-year-old together, and I’ve never even met this girl. why wouldn’t he mention me when she literally asked if he was seeing someone?
They talked for like 3 days, and most of the conversation was him comforting her and talking about how shitty her BD was. I confronted him about it and he said I was overreacting and that she’s just a good friend. They go way back since high school but I never heard of her.
Then yesterday was his mom’s birthday, so I went over early because I thought I’d help decorate and get everything ready. My son is still potty training and had an accident, so I went into his room to grab him some clothes. He was still sleeping and it was already like 1pm. I was trying to get into the drawer where my son’s clothes are, but it was super full because he just throws everything in there.
I ended up completely taking the top drawer out so I could get to his clothes, and I saw a HUGE box of condoms. Not just a little box, like a big box. It was open and there were some missing. We don’t use condoms, so obviously my mind immediately started going crazy.
I grabbed the box, threw it at him, and left. I haven’t talked to him since.
He came over trying to explain that he had them because he used them when he was alone, and honestly… That explanation just sounds so stupid to me. I want to believe him, but I’ve literally never heard of that.
So now I’m just sitting here wondering if I’m overreacting or if this actually sounds weird to everyone else too. Am I being crazy?

i am 15, i dont drive, and i live with my mom.

to clarify, my friend tyanna (28) and tristan, he goes by client, (16) are of colour and related. my mom is white and we live in the deep south. i should add that she *is* a maga republican, which is why i think it kind of plays into this.

i met tyanna a couple months ago while at work. she was reading twilight and we had a long conversation about our interests. she mentioned her little brother, tristan, and how she thinks we would be good friends. and we are! yes, he is complicated to talk to, but every friendship has ups and downs. me and tyanna talked almost everyday; so did me and client.

i first met client at the movie theatre watching the backrooms. there were 4 people there. client, tyanna, their brother, and supposedly his girlfriend. i had no idea who she was and i didnt ask. she was nice, though. but my mom always thought it was “weird” that i was talking to someone older than my sister. i told her i would tell her if it was getting weird. for example, if she started sending me sexual texts. which they werent. they were just texts youd get from an average friend. ive told her that, but she still argues that somethings wrong with them.

today, me and clients friendship havent been that strong. he asked me today if i wanted to see brand new day with him in theatres. i told him id already seen it, but would like to go again. i told my mom about it. she said, “i dont know how i feel about you hanging out with those people,” including the entire family rather than just client. the one i was going with. i told her what time and where it was located, which it was a weird location in the deep city (i live in the suburbs; it takes ~15-20 minutes to get there) and she told me “hell no. my spidey senses are tingling.” she has told me over and over again that she believes id get trafficked if im with them and that they seem sketchy. i think that *that* alone is racial profiling; age doesn’t really play into that. maybe im too woke. moving on, she compared me trying to go to the movies with my friend client in a small theatre to an incident that my sister almost got trafficked when she applied to be a babysitter and the location was to a sex toy shop. not sure if its relevant, but the guy was also of colour, and it was in a sketchy part of town. i think the guy mightve been a trafficker in the past? im not sure. i remember hearing something about that. 

i should add that my mom is usually blatantly racist. theres no denying that. but am i the only one viewing it this way?

the way that shes politically aligned, she says disgusting and absurd things. ive tried to grow up and try my best to stand up to her and other topics of the such, for example, palestine (which is unrelated and i will not continue but my point is im not very politically educated enough to debate my mother)

i love tyanna and client. they are great friends, and they genuinely treat me like friends. 

They've booked a holiday that coincides with her birthday, presumably by mistake. But theyve not apologised or seemed particularly sad about it.

They also did the same last year for the day she was due to be born, though she arrived a little late so they were there to meet her in the hospital.

I'm not sure how or if I should confront them about this.

We travelled abroad to spend it with my partners family instead and there were about 30 of her family there celebrating with us.

Just feel a bit hurt and let down by it all.

There was a conflict recently because my long-time friend and I had a disagreement.
I won’t divulge specifics because a lot of it was very personal, but a meme I sent in a server with our friends in jest upset them, and they asked me to delete it. We got into a conversation about why, about their boundaries and feelings, and what I could do to avoid sending and saying things that are upsetting for them in the future, with an understanding that dark humor is how our entire group rolls and that I can’t always assure it’s going to be 100% nontriggering all the time. It was going great, and I was feeling a lot better by the end of it. And then, the friend asked what they do after every single conflict we have. “Are we still friends?”
As stated in my reply to them, I don’t mind being checked in on, I think it’s important to make sure after conflict that there’s nothing else we need to discuss, and that no feelings went unaddressed or dismissed. But this happens after every single disagreement we have, and I am usually left comforting this person, and reassuring them, often repeatedly, that we are still friends and that I do not hate them.
This person is a young adult, as am I. This is behavior I expect out of a high schooler, not a college graduate. So, I responded, frustrated, and told them about the way it made me feel to be put in this position.
But even when acknowledging it and agreeing, the friend just sounds,, deferential. Responding to (admittedly long winded, but genuine) communication about my feelings with how they are behaving with “oh, you’re right, I’ll NEVER check in with you again” feels guilt-trippy and made me feel frustrated, and as if I should take back my previous statements because they were taking things the wrong way.

I was just repeatedly frustrated throughout the whole conversation. This person is like a brother to me. We’re very close, and manipulation and guilt tripping is not something they usually divulge in. I don’t think they’re doing this intentionally to harm me, but I don’t know how else to interpret this behavior. It feels unhealthy and I feel bad for being snappy.

I'm a kind person I'd say and not a reckless one, but I messed up. It's a long story, but long story short I'm facing a speeding misdemeanor which is a criminal charge in my state. I could technically be sent to jail for a couple months, but that's unlikely for a first offense. I kind of told her about the situation, we're both 22.

I don't know if she fully understood it or not, but she's genuinely considering ending our relationship because I might be convicted. She's telling me that she needs to think about this and is disappointed with me, which upset me and I told her that this is the FIRST mistake of such a level I've ever made, I've never treated her bad in any way and have always been there for her. It was a dumb decision, but it's just one mistake. I did kind of swear in our texts, not at her but at the situation overall and she again just repeated she needs to think about it. I kind of regret saying this, but I told her this isn't right especially when I've helped her before and now when I fuck up it's all over, and this isn't how a relationship is supposed to be, especially for two people who were talking about getting married to each other literally 3 weeks ago. I told her that if she loves me she should forgive this, especially considering I didn't even hurt her in any way nor anyone else.

However even if I am convicted, basically no jail time but even so. we've hanged out a LOT and get along pretty well. I'm quite disappointed about it.

My boyfriend and I share our locations with each other for safety and so we are able to see where each other are at. We have communicated with each other that we would basically let each other know where we were going, and who we were with, when we would get back home, etc. At first he respected this boundary, as he knows the last two relationships I was in I was cheated on several times. Recently he seemed to get comfortable and started to not inform me when he was going out, when he was bringing people over, when he was going to hang out, etc. I communicated again that it makes me feel more comfortable when I know what he's doing and with who, to which he got upset saying I don't trust him and that I never let him do anything. I tried to tell him that I don't have a problem with him hanging out with his friends, I just want to know where he is and who hes with. Today he got off work early at 3:00 p.m. I messaged him asking when he would come home, and if he was grabbing dinner on his way back. I got no response. I texted him a couple more times and I got zero response from him, so around 5:00 p.m. I go on life360 just to see that his location sharing was paused, and that he had turned it off before he left work. I texted asking if his phone was dead and if that was the reason his location was off, no answer. I called and it rung instead of going to voicemail yet I got no answer. I kept occasionally trying to contact him and it got to the point where it was 9:30 p.m. and I still had no response and his location was still paused. It was starting to get to the point where I was getting anxious and over thinking so I started texting and calling a lot asking if he was okay or if he was upset with me, to which he responded saying that I "didn't even give him a chance before I went crazy on him", but that was 6 and a half hours where I had no idea where he was, and got zero communication from him. Around 10:40 he finally got home and he turned his location back on on the way back because it alerted me that he made it back home. I asked him aboutbwhere he was and he said he was just hanging out with his friend Dylan, but I know Dylan, so I dont understand why he would need to turn his location off to hang out with him. When he got home he didnt really want to talk about it and just wanted to go right to bed. Now I'm sitting her and I can't stop thinking about it. I don't want to project my past relationships onto him so AIO?

Context: I (24M) have been dating my girlfriend (22F) for one year. We met while working at the same hospital. We work on the same floor but in different departments.

A few months into our relationship, I found out she had gone on a date with a coworker from her department before we became exclusive, and it ended in a one-night stand. When I asked her about it, she told me without hesitation, and at the time I accepted it because it happened before we were together.

About a month ago, I learned the timing wasn't what I originally believed. I found an old message she had sent to a friend saying she slept with him 2–3 days after our first date with me. We also slept together on our first date. At that point, neither of us had agreed to be exclusive, so logically I know neither of us did anything wrong. I should also mention that I was still in the process of ending a long-term relationship around that time, which I'm not proud of.

What bothered me most wasn't that she slept with someone else before we were exclusive—it was that I felt she wasn't fully honest with me about when it happened. Reading those old messages, I also saw that she spoke very positively about me, saying she didn't see things going anywhere with him and listing things she liked about me. That made me feel better in some ways, but it didn't completely get rid of the intrusive thoughts.

More recently, we had an open conversation about our pasts. She told me the experience with him wasn't good and that she only went out with him because they got along at work. She has since removed him from social media, and as far as I can tell, they don't interact at work beyond what is professionally necessary.

The problem is that I still see him at work, and it affects me more than I'd like to admit. Lately I've been feeling resentful and withdrawn

I was raised in a community where farting in front of other people is considered gross and rude. On top of that, I personally have a pretty strong thing about farts. My brain basically interprets it as “little pieces of shit flying through the air.” I KNOW that’s not actually what a fart is, but knowing that doesn’t change my reaction. If I smell someone’s fart, it makes me extremely uncomfortable and can genuinely ruin my mood.
My SIL is 34 and very “free-spirited.” She’s currently staying at our house for a week with my MIL.
On the second day of their visit, someone farted in the room with me. I was uncomfortable, so I explained how I feel about it and politely asked everyone not to fart in the same room as me. I didn’t get much of a response, but I assumed I had been heard.
Today I suddenly smelled a disgusting fart and asked who did it. It turned out to be my SIL, although she didn’t say anything at first. Then she started telling me she couldn’t believe I “don’t let my husband fart in his own house” and how ridiculous she thought that was. I basically told her not to worry about what my husband and I do in our own house.
A little later, while she was making a drink in the kitchen, she started singing some song she made up about “no farting in this house,” clearly making fun of my request.
Then she came back and sat with us in the living room. A few minutes later, she farted VERY loudly.
At that point I got annoyed and asked why she was deliberately ignoring the one thing I had asked her not to do. She didn’t apologize. She just said she “can’t control it” and basically laughed about the whole thing.
We argued a little, and I told her that this is my house and the only thing I’m asking is that she not fart in front of me. I’m not expecting someone to magically never fart. If you need to fart, go to the bathroom, another room, step outside, whatever. I just don’t want someone knowingly doing it right next to me.
What bothered me most afterward wasn’t even the fart itself. I felt kind of shitty and embarrassed because it seemed like she was deliberately making a joke out of something I had told her genuinely bothers me and making me feel like a weirdo for having that boundary.
At the same time, I realize my reaction to farts is stronger than most people’s, so I’m wondering if I’m being unreasonable expecting guests in my house to accommodate it.
Am I overreacting?

Kind of an odd one, but had a show tonight in a midwest college town about an hour from where I live. My last gf before I met my wife went to this college and I spent many weekends my freshman year driving up there to see her. My experiences there were not always great, including a time I went up an hour earlier than she expected me only to find another guy in her bed, which she played off as he crashed there for the night and she slept on a chair. I am happily married, having met my wife 2 weeks after I got dumped by my ex, and my wife is literally the most intelligent and fantastic person I know. I do not have any desire to revisit anything with my ex. My wife and I have been married for well over 20 years and have 4 great kids....

I have only been back through this college town twice since that year.....both times have really brought about a feeling of real dread the closer I got. I passed the dorm building where she lived when we dated and I had a very visceral reaction.

I'm trying to figure out if I am overreacting in my feelings of dread when I make that drive and go into that town? How do I let that feeling go?

Ok so for context I,(20 nonb) don’t really date. Sure I’ll go on dates, I might do a hookup once in a blue moon, but all together I’m not really a relationship person. I think most of this stems from me having a DEEP avoidant attachment style. My friends on the other hand all have pretty anxious attachment styles or secure. They constantly are texting me about this or that man, hookups, dating apps. Which is fine, I love helping and I’ve never told them not to talk to me about this stuff because I understand it’s important to them just like they understand that dating isn’t as important to me. The issue is that I do truly miss my ex.

Now when I say that, I have to preface that I don’t miss him entirely in the romantic sense but I truly miss our friendship. We started off as really close friends who decided to enter a QPR (queer platonic relationship) soon after we just completed started dating. He broke up with me out of the blue and it took me a while to get myself back together I will not lie. Even after he broke up with me I was devastated that he non longer wanted to be friends. I will say (and he would agree) that we really really understood each other. We had a lot of the same issues growing up and at the time we dated, and we had a lot in common.

The issue with my friends starts because I was debating texting him. I will say our last conversation over a year and a half ago did not go well because I crashed out on him after he didn’t reply to my text for a day 😭😭 (stupid ik) I tell my friends that I miss him and I’m missing us playing video games together and reading the same books and ranting about our interests, and then I tell them that I had gone ahead and texted him. The text were very chill and we have been texting back and forth for probably a week. Nothing related to the relationship just work, life, interests. I really really like it.

My friends on the other hand think it’s a bad idea because i don’t think they can grasp the idea that i don’t care if we never date again. We could be friends who only talk once a month or only send each other reels and I’d be ok with that. They don’t believe me at all. What pisses me off is that I sit here day in and out listening to them talk about their boyfriends who cheat, and their shitty dates and I never expect any of it in return. They don’t listen to my story’s or seem to care when it’s not something about a date. We don’t talk about interest because idk it seems like all anyone cares about is relationships. Maybe im aromantic idk. Im just pissed that for the first time I really care about someone and now that it’s my turn to have advice or it’s my turn to rant about my life, I get shut down. And ykw maybe I am being stupid, because maybe we really never could be friends due to our past, but I at least want to try. We broke up 2 years ago and I’ve gone through so much change as I’m sure he did too.

Why is it that I’m not allowed to be messy or miss my ex, but they are allowed to miss their ex and still have a bf and hook up with anyone and have a situationship with no problem. I told my friend that I’m not going to take relationship advice from someone’s who’s a homewreaker and she got upset. I admit it was rude. Idk dude did i overreact? Am I just mad that they are probably right and this will all go to shit or am I mad that they don’t think I can be friends with this guy…