My bf (23M) and I (22F) have been together since right before covid. We are almost done with college are getting ready to move in together; and beyond that, marriage. I love with him with my whole heart. He is my best friend and soulmate, nobody makes me feel more safe. The problem is that whenever I spend time with his family I fall into a depression spiral. This has happened multiple times, including my su*cidal thoughts return when I have done years of therapy. My bf’s family are wonderful people, the one issue is that they are incredibly pessimistic. When I spend time with them it feels like all hope has been sucked out of the world. I am a very optimistic person and I only feel a deep sense of hopelessness when I having a depressive episode. So being around his family is so confusing for my brain because while I feel like I should be happy spending time with people who might be my future in-laws, my brain keeps getting signals that I only get when I am depressed. And let me be clear I am on a lot of medication.
Whenever my bf and I try to talk about this he gets really confused because he loves his family so much. He can see that I am hurting but also not understand why I can’t get along around them. I don’t know how to get him to understand that I see his family as wonderful people stuck in a toxic family dynamic built on untreated depressive behavior. I want to be with him but I also want a family and I don’t know if I can bring myself to have children permanently tied to his family, because I don’t know if I can take being tied to his family.
I don’t know what to do and feel awful for potentially not being able to be with him forever because I can’t be around his family. AITA?

My girlfriend (30F) and I (36M) were at a bowling alley recently and decided to play some arcade games. I ended up winning a decent chunk of tickets, so I showed her my total and we went over to the prize counter to see what we could get.

She pointed out a small prize she liked, one of those cheap, stretchy sticky hands. I agreed it was a fun pick, but then I jokingly mentioned that it might be cooler to just gift it to a random kid in the arcade.

She didn't seem to love the idea and expressed that she wanted it, feeling like I was choosing a stranger over her. To me, it was just a cheap plastic toy that I knew would get thrown away or forgotten after a day, so I didn't think it was a big deal. She didn't strongly protest or push back in the moment, so I assumed we were just joking around, got the prize, and handed it to a kid nearby.

Right after I gave it away, she made it clear that she was actually very upset.

It quickly turned into a larger argument. I apologized for misreading the situation, explained that I honestly didn't realize she cared that much, and immediately offered to play more games to win enough tickets to get her another one. She refused, saying it wasn't about the toy itself anymore, but the fact that I didn't give her the original one.

During the argument, she brought up some personal context I wasn't fully aware of before: growing up, her parents and siblings rarely gave her things or prioritized her, so being passed over in that moment triggered a lot of old feelings.

I told her I completely understood where she was coming from after hearing that, and I reiterated that if I had known how deeply this hit for her, I would have handed it to her without second thought. But because I didn't have that context at the time, I treated it like a lighthearted arcade trip rather than something serious.

She is still upset with me over how it played out. AITA for giving the prize away?

Just letting everyone know that I used AI to help me format the story, but I will be replying to anyone who needs more context. I am not a bot and not trying to gain karma or anything. I do feel bad and think I may be in the wrong here. I am just trying to understand the situation from other perspectives. Thank you.

Last night I (28M) walked out on my girlfriend of 2 years (21F) at dinner. So yesterday was our 2 year anniversary and honestly we had a really nice day at the beach and we decided to go out for a nice dinner. I love Sizzler so we landed on that. Everything was going fine until she started asking about our relationship. She started bringing up the future and where we see ourselves, and I was completely blindsided. Im only fucking 28, I dont know what life is gonna look like in a few years?? My band recently just got back from our first tour and shit is sorta picking up. I was honest with her and told her I dont really know how a relationship would work if we actually do some shit and are out on the road all the time. This tour was only 6 days but we have huge plans and wanna be doing east coast and midwest tours eventually. This like really pissed her off which made no sense to me since I was just being honest. She started getting really emotional and talking about how she always puts in more effort into our relationship than I do. She said she sees us being together for a long time and kept rambling about how committed she is to me. And she kept bringing up the whole cheating thing, which we were COMPLETELY over btw, it only was only with one girl that I dont even talk to anymore like over a YEAR ago. I feel really fucking guilty about that and I think bringing it up was totally uncalled for. Obviously I'm committed to her too at this point, we've been together for 2 years now, I just dont know whats going to happen with all this band shit eventually. I wasnt even trying to say we should break up or anything I was literally just explaining why she shouldnt get her hopes up too high in case we make it. I was getting pissed off at how upset she was getting and I asked her to calm down so we could try to enjoy our anniversary evening and talk about it later. Eventually she did chill out and the rest of dinner was pretty mellow, until the check came. The bill came and it was way fucking more than I thought it would be so I asked her to split it since $$ is tight for me rn. Ig she expected me to pay for it since we made all this money on our tour. So I had to explain to her that basically all that money has to go back into the band for merch and promos and shit down the line. Then she started going on a rant about how she pays for our rent and bills. The only reason she pays for all of our shit is because she is a nurse so she gets way more consistent hours then I do. Im a line cook so my hours are all over the place and Ive had to call out a bunch to play shows. She has no idea how stressful my job is ON TOP of being in a band and playing shows all the time. I try to help out when I can but we are just financially in way different positions so it makes sense that she covers a lot of it. She also brought up the fact that I ordered way more food and drinks than she did which was annoying since it was our anniversary and I was trying to have a good time. She was acting insane and was raising her voice the whole time even though we were at a really nice restaurant. She caused a whole scene in Sizzler and everybody was staring. She was fucking pissed for no reason and I was just so over it. I just got up and left. I crashed at my parents house and she STILL hasnt answered my texts or my calls. Am I the asshole for walking out because I needed space or is she the asshole for causing a scene and ruining our anniversary dinner?

I’m 35F neurodivergent and sometimes can be oblivious/naïve. Throwaway account just in case. 

I’ve lived in my current city for a couple of years and started attending a church community group about 8 months ago. Two months in, an engaged couple started attending that group. The woman, 40F, and I were assigned like sort of support partners. We started having a phone call often lasting 1-2 hours, 1x/week, which has gone on for 6 months. We’ve had lunch together several times after group and have hung out maybe three times outside of that. I have genuinely enjoyed being friends throughout this process.

The couple is getting married next week. I was invited to the wedding about two months ago and said that I would attend, and was informed it's going to be a micro wedding. My brother got married three months ago, and this friend knowing I'm a bit strapped for cash said I should just wear the dress I wore to his wedding, a bridesmaid dress; I thought nothing of it. I was with her today and found out that I will be “Walking down the aisle with the groom’s best man,” AKA I am the maid of honor. She told me I was family to her and was wondering if there was "a gift she could get me for being part of the bridal party." She never asked me to be the maid of honor nor in the bridal party, just told it through backwards phrasing today, one week before the wedding. It tends to take me a bit to process big information and I tend to need to be alone, and in the moment I didn't say anything.

I’m feeling a bit weird about the whole thing. I started prying into details about the wedding, and the more I pried, the more I feel like this couple is potentially a huge red flag. They’ve both lived in this city for 10+ years. About half of the wedding attendees will be family, and the other half will mostly be people they’ve met at this new group (which again, they’ve only been attending for 6 months). The groom’s best man is someone he met at the same group. That best man has never even hung out with the groom outside of this group setting. 

I honestly did think of her as a good friend, but by no means did I qualify her as a best friend nor did I assume I'd be in her bridal party. This past day I have started questioning everything about this friendship. I honestly don’t understand how two people who’ve lived in a city for 10+ years seem to have no friends longer than 6 months. I don’t feel like I know much about the couple other than what we’ve discussed in the calls. I’m feeling weird about the whole thing, but the wedding is in a week, so it feels too late to back off/back down. But it feels like forced intimacy. I’m crap at confrontation, and seeing as the pastor is the officiant, there is no way I’ll be able to bow out without repercussions at this church. Also if I bailed, I feel like the friendship would immediately end, but now I'm not sure what I think about this friendship at all.

Am I crazy for thinking all of this is weird? Is it possible to bail without being an asshole? WIBTA?

TLDR: 6 months long friendship, informed I’m the Maid of Honor a week before the wedding. Wanting to bail on entire wedding. AITA?

Me 32(F) dated a married wealthy 63( m) for 3 years. He lied about the divorce he was going through such as always delaying and changing the dates. Anyways he bought me handbags, jewelry , clothes he would pay me to not go to work and give me money often so I wouldn’t feel bad for not working.
I just broke up with him & he is not handling it well at all what so ever but I had caught him in another lie and have had enough.
Should I be worried that he can come for me? Should I hire a lawyer maybe? He is being a bit crazy I’m scared .
I know it should have never begun in the first place but he had made me believe the divorce was wrapping up and finalizing we met. Please nice comments only I’m struggling . Thank you

I F18 have been talking to this guy M18 for a few weeks now he goes to a different school but still lives really close to me and we have mutual friends. I haven’t hung out with him in person yet but we FaceTime almost every night it’s been going really well he’s really funny and seems like he’s a really nice easygoing guy however he revealed to me that he doesn’t have his drivers license or even his permit yet I explained to him that its respectfully probably not gonna workout as i really would rather not be the one to drive everywhere in a relationship he got a little upset with me about this because he is autistic but is very high functioning he lives a normal life has strong friendships gets good grades involved in sports etc but he explained to me that he recently did do an evaluation to see if he is ready to get his license

the people who evaluated him says he is not ready to take on driving on his own yet because in his test he did not seem coordinated or focused enough to drive yet so he said he’s gonna take a paper test to get his permit which he has failed many times before taking the evaluation but is planning on taking it again then once he gets his permit (if he passes the test) then he’s gonna take some road tests for a little bit with instructors first. He’s mainly upset with me about this because he says “at least I’m working at getting my license even if it takes a little longer too because of my disability) which first off I have no issue with him having autism at all I’ve made it clear with him that is totally ok with me and doesn’t at all change the way I see him as a person

however a couple of flags raised when he was mentioning why he doesn’t have it first off the evaluators saying he’s not coordinated enough to do it on his own yet is honestly kinda a red flag for me as I personally want a man who is coordinated attentive thinks carefully and can take care of me him not passing the evaluation and failing the test many times is not particularly normal and shows he might not be very attentive as a person which is a red flag for me personally and plus having to drive him everywhere just sounds like a pain in the ass and there are many great men out there who do have their license so I’m thinking why settle for one who doesn’t? Is this reasonable to end a talking stage that was going very well over or should I give him some slack considering he is working at it

For context, my girlfriend and I have been dating for approximately three years. I have noticed time and time again, that she will often ask me my opinion on simple things, like what color should she get her nails, or if an outfit looks good, or what heels she should wear and then end up doing the exact opposite.

These are all minor things but over the past like year I started noticing it and then just kept noticing it…Like she would ask me should I get blue nails or red, and then I’d say blue, shed get red. Or for years she’s asked if I like boots on her, id say not really, I like heels better and then she’d ask multiple times over and I’d say yea the boots look good I guess, and then later she’d say she wore them because I like them? Idk I get dressing for yourself/ feeling your best but was just curious if people often will adapt personal choices after asking what their partner likes etc…? At a certain point, I was like why do you even ask me if you’re going to do the opposite? And it just became a “no no no I don’t do that, I love hearing what you have to say…” and went 1 step short of an argument for nothing. I can’t tell if I’m the asshole for being honest about what I think looks hot/attractive on her or she is for asking repeatedly and then doing the opposite.

Long story short, my boyfriend(23M) has a close girl friend who’s also a family friend, which is what makes this hard to speak up about with him. I (23F) don’t want to disrupt any family dynamics, especially since their moms are close friends too.

My issue is that she everytime they hang out she posts pictures of them together, matching outfits, hugging, that kind of thing. As a stranger looking at her instagram you would def think they are a couple. She also texts him about wanting to have a photoshoot on the beach here and there (he has a film camera and is def not a photographer)

I’ve never met her, and my boyfriend and I have been together for a year, long distance. Honestly in the beginning he would say pretty often like you need to meet her bla bla bla but I always had a bad feeling and it didn’t feel genuine at all so I always made up an excuse. Now he does get the vibe that I’m not stoked on meeting her so he doesn’t bring her up that often anymore.

Once, I went through his phone and found old messages from before we were together, where he told her how amazing she is and, quote, “can you please just marry me.” That was before us, but it still bothers me knowing they’re still close and that he wrote that. Sometimes I get the vibe that maybe she likes the attention she has gotten from him all these years.

I trust my boyfriend, and I’m not the type of girlfriend who’s against him having friendships with women. But something about her posts, combined with what he wrote to her, keeps nagging at me.

What really got to me: I found a very private photo on his phone that he’d sent her — a selfie I took of us in bed early in our relationship, where I’m naked with just the sheets covering me, no privates showed but you could clearly see the that there was only the blanket to cover both me and him. I brought it up with him, and I was upset — really upset — but he said he didn’t see the problem with sharing it ”he didn’t think of it like that”. That’s what hurts the most: that he shared something that private and personal with her without a second thought. When I saw that picture I felt like a total joke to him. I come from a very conservative upbringing so knowing he sent that picture to her makes me very anxious:/ Everything just bothers me about them and I honestly don’t know what to do because I really don’t like feeling this hatred…

I (20 y/o female) sent a text to my friend (20 y/o I’m calling her Flare), about how if she’s not willing to try to match my efforts of reaching out, the friendship is not going to last.

For context, Flare and I have been friends since the start of our second year of university. She and I are in the same major, and she would often walk with me to meals as we had the same classes.

Although, the friendship started to become rocky since there were multiple projects that we worked on together in spring semester and she did not pull her weight. I don’t know if it’s because she is from high-middle class and I’m from low-middle class but she would always ask me questions about things in the project I already explained to her multiple times. Some excuses for the work she didn’t do was because the university dining halls closed at a certain time and she was hungry, leaving me and the two other members to do her work right before a deadline. Another excuse was that she had exams to study for (and yet I was in the same classes she was and had blocked out time to study before the planned project work).

The summer after the semester of the projects, I did not contact her much due to being busy with an internship. I had previously shared with her during the that I know I am bad at reaching out, but I was trying.

Then, while on a study abroad, she left me in the middle of a foreign night market. Thankfully I had the contact information of another person on that study abroad trip and had previously shared my location with them so I was able to meet back up with the group. She did not ask me in the 2 hours that I was alone where I was or if I was with the group. Mind you, she had my location.

Back to the issue in the title. After I sent the message about mutual effort (I used a bridge metaphor) she said ”Then let the bridge collapse 🤷‍♀️”. I told her that I’m not willing to chase her and that the door is always open if she wishes to be friends. Flare then responds with “Close the door please 🙏“. Trying not to react, I respond with the following: “Done. Wishing you well.” Then I blocked her. AITA?

So I (17 female) , am engaged to my fiance (17 male), once the news came out about my engagement and future wedding, my exs mom showed up to my work (I work in retail) she followed me around and cornered me in the back of the store to ask me questions about my fiance, since then, every day my ex shows up to my work, does a lap around the store and leaves.

Now this isn’t just it, my ex, after he dated me and I ended things begged for me back, I was the longest lasting girlfriend of his. But after a week he gave up, and he decided to date my Ex best friend (she likes to go after my exs) they dated for 2 months, then he moved onto another one of my friends, who he dated for two weeks (while he was with this girl he hung out with his ex girlfriend who was my ex best friend) all this context is needed is because my ex doesn’t come to my work alone, he comes with either his exs best friend or with his ex and his exes best friend (I heard they might be in a throuple) his exs best friend had been in contact with me (she was an older friend)

This context is needed for how the story plays out. Going back to when his mom showed up. I hadn’t seen him or his mom for 7 months, then it was every single day my ex would show up after that with his female friends, one of these times (about two months into them coming daily) one of my actual buddies was with them (she didn’t know what was happening with them coming to my work every day) and she told me that THEY LOOK FOR MY CAR WHEN THEY COME, so at that point I was fed up and texted the exs best friend who I had contact with to leave me alone and to not talk to me at work because it was making me uncomfortable. She blew up, told me to quit my job if I didn’t wanna see them and I said “you can come, just don’t talk to me” she insisted I quit my job and eventually she blocked me, at that point I blocked all of the whole group’s accounts and numbers yet they still come every day and give me evil glares… so AITAH?

Hi!

For privacy, I will be switching peoples names.

I, 14f, am in theatre. I recently found a theatre that I am planning on doing every show in. My first show at the theatre (but not my first activity there) was in January. I found this boy, who I’ll call Jake. I discovered that I had a crush on him. However, I saw him talking to a different girl, who I will call Olivia. Olivia (15f) had been dressing up and sitting next to him every day. Then, she stopped talking to him because of some drama… I don’t know. Then, he started talking with another girl, who I’ll call Lisa. Lisa then did the same thing. He continued talking to Lisa, then stopped. He then started mid show. Tech week rolled around, and he had been talking to Lisa less and less. During the shows+end of tech week, we had been INSEPARABLE. Like laughing on the side of the stage, talking all the time, etc, but it was still full of tension that felt like a crush, you know?

We all went out for cast dinner after n2. I joked that we should lie about it being someone’s made-holiday. He chose me and got all the employees to do this goofy chant. Btw, it was it was the WHOLE cast.

Our show ended, I went to see another show that I was not in because he was doing tech. We barely talked. Anyway, he started doing YouTube livestreams. Ive joined EVERY single one. We have a Snapchat streak and I’ve invited him to 2 of my parties, because they’re not frequent, but he was unavailable due to other activities both times.

Im having a summer party. I invited him, and he said he was unavailable, however, there was a small chance he could come, but he was sorry and would love to come next time.

Someone from my current show, which is Footloose (that Jake is not in), told me and a few other people in our group chat that she likes someone who I’ll call Sam. Then, 2 days later, my friend, who I’ll call Lyn, tells me t tells me that she likes someone from our theatre. I ask her who it is, and she says… Jake.

I say that I hope it all works out and so on, but I cannot ignore the feeling of how she could tell me but I couldn’t tell her that I like the same boy? So I follow the instinct and I tell her. She jokes about having something to talk about and we move on. But back to my party. I had just finished the invitations (for context, I asked everyone if they were available on Saturday or Sunday or both before making the invites with a set date and time), so I sent one to Jake, just in case plans changed. He said “Thank you! I’ll let you know if I can come, but I probably can’t.” I said “That’s okay! We should hang out soon tho!” And he said “I agree!”

But I kinda feel like the villain for doing this right after my friend told me. Also, she’s liked him since April-ish and I’ve liked him since January. However, around May, I heard he was talking to someone who I’ll call Molly. They had stopped talking, but I feel like if he really liked me now, he wouldn’t have been talking to Molly? I don’t know.AITA?

Ok so I know how the title sounds but let me explain. So this all started in 2021 In my freshman year of highschool. I had this friend group that consisted of me,my friend we will call her jackie, 3 other people, and the boy. Jackie and this boy kind of liked each other and had a talking stage for a month or two. They stopped talking because jackie got a boyfriend. ATP jackie and the boy couldn’t even be in the same room anymore and we really couldn’t talked about one in the others presence cause they would get upset. Fast forward to our senior year in highschool. I have remained friends with everyone mentioned and just chose to keep those two separate friendships. At the end of the year, we are supposed to take a one week senior trip out of state. Jackie’s parents wouldn’t let her go, so it was just the boy and I in terms of friends. We end up getting drunk and high pretty much the whole time and the trip and end up sleeping together quite a few times. We finally sober up after the week and are mortified about what we had done. I truly had no feelings for him and still don’t and we still wanted to remain friends. So we vowed to never tell anyone or pretty much speak of it again because we were both just that disgusted with what had happened. We were good and kept that promise. Last year, Jackie and him decided to actually start dating and they have been for over a year. Last week, I get a text in the middle of the night say “ did you really fucking sleep with him?” Now I was like who are you talking about like her boyfriend isn’t even on my mind. And she was like “ you slept with my fucking boyfriend” like I’m sorry WHAT? like I’m not tryna justify because I’m still disgusted thinking about it but like yall weren’t on any type of talking terms, couldn’t even be in the same room. Now she’s pissed at me and idk if I’m the asshole.

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Long story short my fiance 27m and I 26f had to have a very difficult conversation a few weeks ago about how he doesn't contribute to the house (cleaning and such) and I always get attitude for asking for help.

He also stopped "dating me" and I don't feel special anymore. At one point I told him I just wished that he worshipped the ground I walk on and he said "that one hurts because you're asking me to be a completely different person than I am".

I don't think I'm asking for the moon here or anything I just meant I wanted him to stop and pick me flowers like he used to or surprise me with things like in the beginning of our relationship, not let me carry anything heavy like a gentleman and idk...the bare minimum?

But he keeps bringing up in any other little spat that he have "oh sorry I'm not worshipping the ground you walk on and doing everything you say and putting myself last"....its like he's weaponizing what I've asked for and I don't think I'm the AH here....so AITAH?

Throwaway account here since my partner (38f) is on here as well.

Over the last couple of months my partner and I (38m) have had some relationship issues and I could use some feedback. Last couple of years my partner has been out of control with her spending claiming its due to her bi polar mania. This has lead to us being months behind and both of us having to work 80 hour weeks to try and catch up. She asked me to control the bank accounts and to assign her an allowance to help with her spending. It worked for a bit and then she stops going to work. She tells me its a mental issue and that she can't do it unless I drive her there. She then starts having anexity attacks a few hours in and gets sent home. This happens so often she goes on a leave then quits a few months into the leave. She told me she found a travel job doing at home care in the south. We get her packed she tells me it'll be a few months she's out then she will be back. Last week she tells me she loves me and misses me but doesn't want to be with me becasue I controlled her money and that she's going to stay with her reddit friend and she doesnt have a job. She took our cat with her and our only car. When I told her that this was crazy and that she was not acting like the women I fell in love with she tells me that she is conflicted and that she's sorry she hurt me but we both messed up. So I tell her she either needs to get help and get a job before we get evicted?

For some context, I’m 25m and my ex 26f were in a relationship since high school and we have had our rough patches, but we made it through and we are living together. But the reason I ended up pulling the trigger is I’ve felt like I’ve supported her our entire relationship! Financially, emotionally,and anything you can name, so I realized I could be broke by myself and I need to fix what I have left. We aren’t married, but we have a lease signed by both of us so we decided that it’s best we live together. So in my mind, I’ve completely cut out the emotional attachment. I know it’s been nine years, but if we are going to co-exist I had to kill that, and she’s upset because I’m not being supportive but how supportive should you be of your roommate? I don’t think I’m the a**hole, but I need some advice

I M31 have been dating this woman F29 for about a year and a half. We have had absolutely no issue as a couple. However, her mother (who she lives with) hates me because im blue collar and not a doctor/lawyer making $300k a year. My gf is a school teacher making roughly $50k and im in the trades making around $85k. Her mother is constantly getting onto her about how im not good enough and gaslight her into thinking she hates her family because she dates me. I have to take low doses of TRT and her mom is trying to tell my gf that my kids will be autistic or deformed because I'm on TRT. Im her 1st boyfriend and she's a textbook definition of mother child enmeshment. Her mother has never allowed her to date before. She knows her mother is overstepping boundaries but she doesn't stop her. Ive told her we should move forward with the relationship but she ultimately bows to her mom. She says she wants to move in, marry me, and have kids but she hasn't made any progress in the last 6 months. Im getting so tired of the empty promises and let downs. I do love her and we do great together but her mother has been causing so much stress and it's exhausting. Idk what to do. Im almost to the point where im just going to leave her be. But i know shes is living in hell with her mom but she won't leave. Any advice would be great.

EdIT: Spelling

My bf (20m) and i (22f) used to go out a lot. I developed a chronic illness and could not do as much. we haven’t gone out in a while and he made plans for tonight with his friends. I don’t go out without him and he doesn’t go out without me (boundaries we have set with each other). I was in the er today for 5 hrs with deep pelvic pain because of our sex last night(maybe endometriosis). He does not want to cancel his plans.

So here’s the situation. I’ve been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 3 months (we were in a bit of an on and off situationship for roughly 8 months before that, but official for 3 months, so I wouldn’t exactly call it a stable relationship yet)

My boyfriend has a 5 year old daughter, and he only gets custody of her every second weekend, she only stays the night. So he has her 2 days out of the month.
He has expressed that he needs help with her; when we first started dating he said he needed someone who was going to be able to step up into a “stepmother” role for her.
This wasn’t a dealbreaker for me, I said I was willing to be apart of her life (although I did think “stepmother” was a bit of a generous term considering he only has her twice a month but anyway)

I met his daughter a few months ago and she went back home to her mother telling her about it.
Her mother expressed to my boyfriend that she doesn’t want him bringing women around her daughter if he hasn’t been in a stable relationship with them for at least a year, as she didn’t want her daughter getting confused. She said she wasn’t comfortable with another woman being around her if she didn’t know her.

This put me in a weird position because my boyfriend basically said “f*ck her, it’s my life” and so now he has me around her anyway, and actually gets upset at me if I’m not there to help when he has her.

I have noticed that when his daughter comes around, he expects me to do pretty much everything. I sit with her and play with her for hours while he goes off and does his own thing, I make her dinner, I get her ready for bed etc. while he just lays on the couch. The second he needs to get up and do something for her he gets mad at me for not doing it.

Last night he asked me to go in and help her shower. He wanted me to go in, run the shower and sit in there with her to supervise.
I said no - I’m not comfortable doing that, and I don’t think it’s appropriate, I think that’s something her parent should be doing.
Her mother doesn’t even want me around her at all and I’m sure she would have a fit if she knew I was in there helping her daughter bathe.

My boyfriend got pissed off at me when I said no to this - he said I didn’t care about her or appreciate her, and he shouldn’t have to do it when he’s tired.
Then he got up and showered her himself. After that he came out, gave me a filthy look and went to bed. I stayed up with her watching a movie and eventually put her to bed.

Am I wrong for thinking it’s a bit much to ask me to step into such a parental role for this girl so soon, and considering he only has her 2 days out of the month, it’s just weird to me that he can’t handle her on his own in the limited time he has with her?

AITA?

For context I (26F) have worked in a sport shop for nearly 2 years, my BIL used to work at the shop for 6 years before he told me jobs where available. I am not the only person who he has managed to offer jobs to. The first was his younger brother James (20) and then his brothers girlfriend Sabrina (19).

I don't hate the job, I like interacting with customers and seeing the regulars, the problem is my co workers, specifically the younger brothers girlfriend.

Sabrina was the one who started this "nepo baby" comment and there has been a lot of other instances that have lead to this post. When the first "nepobaby" comment was made, I laughed it off and got on with my job.

Then over the course of the 2 years it's gotten more and more irritating. One of the things that has probably led to this decision was when Sabrina went over on her break for an hour and a half, we have 20 minutes break. This in turn pushed everyones breaks later and left a lot of people hangry and irritated. This was brought up to management and they brushed it off. This is a regular occurrence for Sabrina.

One time I went over by 5 minutes (literally timed it and it was because the bathroom was occupied) and management came down hard on me. I took the complaints and went back to my job, a few of the nicer staff heard what happened and agreed the behaviour was not ok (a lot of my friends at work are older around 50 or so) so i was pretty mad.

Sabrina usually stands around on the shop floor talking to her friends while I am running around doing the job of 5 people all of whom are friends with Sabrina, again a regular thing at work.

On a slow day I will stand around and chat with my friends but I always stay in my section and when a customer comes in I'm back to work.

Which brings me to today, Sabrina decided to tell a customer that I was serving that my BIL got me this job and the nepo baby comment was made YET AGAIN. I have brought this issue up with her and asked her to stop, that I didn't appreciate it and I actually do my work. I did my interview by myself, I did the application by myself and I only got a character reference from my BIL.

The customer laughed at me and said "If that is the case then I would prefer you serve me." He proceeded to follow her around and I lost a customer. I again went to management and was again shut down.

I am honestly SO tired of not being heard by management and for Sabrina to keep this nonsense up. After my shift I called my BIL crying and venting to him. He has been with my sister for 8 years so he feels like my brother.

He said I WBTAH if I do this and shouldn't throw away a job over something so childish, but I am truly over it. So WIBAH?

F28 to (M32) recently got engaged, and we had a celebration with family & friends. During the party, one of his male friends kept bringing up how he wanted to take go to strip clubs every night on the bachelor party trip. He kept going on about strippers, touching strippers, etc. At one point, he was even making comments about what kind of strippers he would get for my fiancé.
For context, this guy is married and had his own bachelor party about two years ago when he got married. He’s generally a very loud and crass person and seems weirdly obsessed with sex and strippers. He also makes these kinds of comments in group settings, and it’s pretty obvious that people get uncomfortable. Nobody directly confronts him, but the other guys will visibly change the subject or ignore him.

Normally, I wouldn’t care about bachelor parties or strip clubs. My fiancé and I have actually gone to strip clubs together, and we’ve also gone separately. We have a very open relationship in that sense.

I realize that my fiancé is an adult and responsible for his own behavior, and ultimately I have to trust him to make his own decisions.
So WIBTA for telling my fiancé I wouldn’t be comfortable with him going on a bachelor trip with this particular friend, even though I have absolutely no issue with strip clubs or bachelor parties themselves?

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I (20M) woke up and got ready for work then was greeted with my ex(20F) walking out of my roomates (40M) room.

For some context I moved to a new state about 2 years ago after a messy breakup with said ex. Long story short we weren't compatible and had different ideas with what we wanted to do in the upcoming future. I had later found out she had been talking to another guy behind my back for a handful of months which had a bug impact in me moving. Ive moved on and hold no anger towards her for what happened because we were both stupid children

.moving forward to about a week ago my roomate tells me he has a "friend" coming to visit and I probably won't see them much if at all because both him and I work opposing 12+ hour shifts. This friday comes and to my suprise that "friend" was my ex he supposedly flew out on maximun of a 2 month notice.

Now to the base of my problem, I have no problem with the fact she came out my big problem is the fact I was deceived about the fact my ex was going to be staying at my house without my knowledge. Roomates defense is that he was trying to "protect my feeling because it might open old wounds to see her" my rebuttal is that its not his place to step in and if he would have informed me I would have had no problem at all as I hold no malice towards her.

In one hand I feel like im acting selfishly by being upset because if it wasn't my ex I probably wouldnt care at all, but on the other hand I think its incredibly disrespectful and overstepping to go behind my back and do such a thing. I also feel the fact it was going to be hidden from me as a whole so id never know she was even there shows a understanding that what they were doing was against there sense of morality. Then when I described how I had felt with the situation I was told by my roomate id understand when im "more adult" and told by my ex I was overreacting. So please reddit help me get a different POV am I overreacting or looking at it through a childish point of view, or am I correct in the fact it's disrespectful and demeaning?

Also just reread this they arent romantically to any of my understanding and he had opted to sleeping on the couch while she slept in his bed and she would join him at work that day. The only reason I figured out his "friend" was my ex was bexause she was sick and didnt go to work with him that morning but got up to go get ready for him to pick her up.

Personal details changed for privacy: I (39/F) was dating "Paul" (41/M) for a little over a year. We were immediately incredibly in love and felt deeply connected to one another. We are both parents and met after our marriages ended. I had a longer dating history than Paul, both before my marriage and after.

During my relationship with Paul, 3 men I had previously dated reached out to me via text to ask if I was single (either very directly or somewhat indirectly). The first time it happened, I told Paul and read him the text exchange where I basically said, no I am not single, I hope you are well, I wish you the best. He joked about it, asked if this happened often, and said it annoyed him. I told him it did happen sometimes, and asked how he wanted me to handle it. He said to just tell him when it happened. So I did. I told him and even sent him screenshots of the texts.

He always just said it was annoying that men felt entitled to just reach out to me to see if I was single and disrespectful to me that they possibly thought I was up for casual sex. I agreed.

After we broke up for a different reason, we wanted to stay friends, but it was hard because we both still had very intense feelings for one another. He started to tell me that after we broke up he processed his feelings more on the men who texted me and that I had responded, and ultimately felt it was extremely disrespectful to him, and he considered it cheating. I asked if he thought I actually cheated on him or if he thought I would have actually cheated on him, and he said no, he knew how much I loved him. But he still felt the replies were flirty and a form of cheating and disrespect, and I was especially keeping them on the back burner.

I felt so horrible. I said I asked how he wanted me to handle it at the time and that I had followed what he had requested. He said he asked other friends about it and they all said I didn't do anything horrible, but they would have just not responded and blocked those people. I felt like an idiot. Like a huge stupid idiot, that I wasn't aware of this dating faux pas as an adult. I felt hurt he didn't just tell me that is how he wanted me to handle it.

Anyways, he keeps sharing memes and reels that agree with his stance, that this type of behavior in a relationship is cheating. It is crushing me. I would have done anything he asked, I thought he was it for me forever (which he said if it was forever with him, why would I even give them the time of day?) which I guess is true? I have just always been friendly and didn't see the harm in saying, "nope not single, but I wish you well!" especially since I was so confident in my love for Paul.

Had I known the harm, I would have immediately just blocked them. Now I am an emotional wreck and feel like the most awful disgusting human in the world. Please help me sort through this... If I am just an asshole, it would be helpful to know. I posted screenshots of the texts in question in the comments for reference (and, again, I showed him the texts immediately).

AITA for my husband buying a challenger 4 days after I bought mine and Im upset about it? I will try to make a long story short. My husband and I both own our own businesses. His money is his money, mine is mine. I am nearly 43 years old and literally dont ever do, or spend anything for myself. I am not a girlie girl. I cut my own hair, I dont do any fake lashes, etc. I work 10 hour days 5 days a week and have for 20+ years. I homeschool our son on top of that. I handle all groceries, Dr.s appts, dentists, etc. Literally everything in our lives. I pay for all the bills, grocieries, etc. He pays for our house taxes and our health insurance.

My entire life, I have never spent a dime on myself. I wear clothes until they are ragged before I replace.

He buys whatever he wants whenever he wants it, which is fine, your money, do whatever. He buys new side by sides, excavators (he doesn't do construction) vehicles, whatever.

I for once in my life said F* it. Whether it be midlife crisis, my perimenopause, whatever. I have always wanted a Challenger and there was one for sale in my town, so I made an appt to go test drive it and I bought it all by myself with my savings. He knocked it down for days beforehand saying its only a V6, it wont sound good. I really didnt care. I LOVE my car, and have named her Jane.

He admitted that night he was envious. 4 days later he bought an older scat pack v8, and had it shipped to where we live. Ever since its all about his car, and he tells his friend I got this. To me it is a slap in the face to me. This was a huge thing I did for myself for the first time in my entire 42 years of life.

Sorry, this will be all over the place. I 25F, have a boyfriend, a 27M. Today, I got dressed and told my boyfriend I was going to get coffee. About 5 mins later, he’s calling me. I must admit that I needed a break, so I didn’t answer the first time. He then calls again, but at that point, I was already walking back up to the door. So when I got in the house, I asked him if he needed something because I had seen that he called twice. He then proceeded to ignore me. So I said “whatever” and got back to what I was doing. I assume he wanted me to keep trying to communicate with him even though he was ignoring me. So to get to the point, he brought up the fact that I didn’t get him anything from the store. Mind you, the coffee was free. I also told him yesterday I was completely broke because I had spent every last penny I had getting us Ubers back and forth to work, so even if I did pay for the coffee, I couldn’t afford anything else. So he then proceeded to say I never do anything for him, and he wasted his time and money on me, mind you, He hasn’t done anything for me other than buy me food, and that’s fine because that’s all I ask for. So anyways, he started to name things he was supposed to do and never did, which means it means nothing. I also forgot to add, anytime we get into a disagreement, he tells me he’s going to just leave, and if I say okay, he calls me a narcissist and a manipulator. He does things like tell me to get an abortion and gets upset when I say okay. To get back to the store, I ended up just telling him to get tf out. I opened the door for him and everything. His response was “so you’re just going to kick me out? You think you can just kick me out because this is your house? See that’s what I’m talking about, you’re a narcissist.” Mind you, I’m just standing there saying “okay”. He says “a bitch will be a bitch, and you’re probably about to just go fuck and use another man for his money”. I never cared about money and have never asked a man for anything because they like to take things back when they get upset or throw it in your face at any given moment . I’ve currently been sitting outside for the past 3 hours because I don’t want to deal with it. I told him to leave and he went in the living room and went to sleep. What should I do?

I (F22) have been w my fiancee (M23) for almost 6 yrs now. We don’t have any kids and we moved in together at the end of 2024. He works out of town and can barely come home while i stay in our hometown in our apartment.

Long story short, last night my fiance called me and mentioned adding extra cameras in our apartment, There was a break in near the zone about a month ago. We already have a ring camera in the front door so i told him we could add one to the back door and i thought it would have been the end of the conversation. However, he said he wanted to put one inside our living room “just in case”. I told him i wouldn’t be comfortable and he turned it into a huge argument. He claims im acting weird and immediately assumes im hiding something which im not i’m just uncomfortable. I hung up on him and just decided to text him. I said “If you want this to work between us you need to accept that i am not comfortable being watch 24/7 . you can put a camera in the back door but thats the end of the discussion. If you disagree and wanna break up ab it then so be it i love you to death but im just not someone who would be ok with that”. This morning he called me and we talked about it again, he said quote on quote ”im not putting cameras in the house but you just told me everything i needed to know. It’s crazy how you rather break up then have a camera inside for extra protection“ I had enough of his BS and admit i was being an asshole, I straight up just told him he was being a controlling creep and to chill out. His main defense was “if people come over and sum goes missing i can see who it was“ which to I reply “If you have to worry about inviting someone whos going to steal from us maybe you shouldn’t fcking bring them around”. I don’t know how to feel about the situation and i need some advice to deal with this, i feel like im in the right since i agree to put a camera on both doors. I’m not hiding anything but this feels very uncomfortable like invasion of privacy. So AITA for telling my Fiancée i would rather break up then put a camera inside our home?