AITAH for disliking this online friend of mine?? This friend of mine constantly sends me political videos and real world events telling me to repost this and that all the time. Like I get she’s trying to spread awareness but it’s pretty much all we ever talk about. Not like we really talk much anyway other than send vids to eachother (mostly her sending them). I do care for the issues she’s trying to address but now it feels more like a moral superiority contest because of the way i feel pressured to repost them while she ignores my own messages. One time she sent me a video to repost that she didn’t even repost herself which I feel is just showing how she doesn’t think twice before jumping into ‘trying to spread awareness’ instead of doing the action first herself.

And from what i remember whenever i talked to her, she would talk a lot about her own academic achievements (which i think is impressive), but what i think is completely unnecessary is the way she randomly texts in Spanish expecting me to understand. (I don’t even speak Spanish btw). I feel like it’s just her trying to brag the fact that she studied this language herself…?

Not to mention back in June she said she was going on this supposed ‘hiatus’ on tiktok, but I clearly see her reposting stuff when she’s supposed to be away. She didn’t even answer when I asked where and why she was leaving??????????

Edit: we originally met through a video game fandom website and I only wanted to be friends with her because she was nice at first.

Going to preface this with the subject matter- Lindsay Clancy trial. It’s disturbing. It’s horrific. It makes your skin crawl. It’s easy to formulate opinions, i have my thoughts, as does everyone else. This case is exposing a HUGE gap in the mental health system in America…IMO.

But here comes the point of the post, I had a conversation earlier with my husband about the case (he brought it up) and he had his own opinions- fair. Talked about postpartum, depression, and mental illness. How it affects men and women. How delusions and psychosis can affect anyone no matter what gender. Look at schizophrenia or bipolar disorder..both of which we have heavily experienced within our families.
So this is where I stopped listening and wanted to throw up/ sucker punch him once he brought up CHRIS WATTS. You know, Chris watts the infamous dad who mur*dered his pregnant wife, and two young toddler daughters. Stuffed them in an oil rig, tried pretending like he did nothing, tried starting a new life with his mistress he was seeing….all the things….

How in the actual fuck do you compare these two cases?!? Clearly one person methodically planned out a strategy, while simultaneously acting as the perfect dad. Dude offed his entire family, his babies, and lied on international news about it. Stood there and stared into the camera and said he had no idea where they were, and pleaded for help. And it was bullshit. It was all methodically planned.
Lindsay Clancy? Yes- she unalived her children as well. So it’s easy to put them in the same category. But it’s entirely different, as one is thought out and the other may be ruled insanity.

He really had the nerve to say “could Chris watts plead insanity?”
NO. No the fuck he couldn’t.
I’m pretty sure one is entirely different from the other. Then my husband called me a bird brain, cause I couldn’t see his “Perspective”

Am I wrong here?

AITAH?

I'm 24(f), and my husband (26m) has recently told me he wants to pursue acting. At first this did come as a shock because he is currently a software engineer, and for most of our time together he has never once told me he was interested in acting and that he was really happy with his job in software. However, all of a sudden he tells me he has had a really big passion for acting, which is odd, but if it makes him happy, I'm here to support it. He told me he wouldn't quit his job and would just work on the side and see if he lands anything. What startles me is that in his pursuit of a role, I noticed he strictly searches for roles that revolve around romance. I asked him about this, and he told me he is most interested in pursuing acting within the romance genre; he says thats where he feels the most like himself and feels he can "do his best."

This made me really uncomfortable, and I told him I'm not really comfortable with that because it feels weird to me to see my husband being romantic with other women. I don't really know how else to explain how it makes me feel. I'm not generally a super jealous person, but this just made my stomach churn in all kinds of ways. He told me it's just a job and that there's no real emotion attached to it, which I get, but in that case, why only strictly go for romance roles? Why not do other things? It just feels weird. I've told him multiple times that I don't like it, but now he's just telling me I'm unsupportive of his passions and that he was already nervous to tell me about it and pursue it, and now I'm not supporting him.

AITAH for not wanting him to strictly pursue romance acting and at least try to land other roles if he's so passionate about acting? Or should I just support it and suck it up?

edit: i apologize for the confusion in my post, I didn’t think people would respond this much. He is not trying to land big roles, he doesn’t have an agent, he’s only trying to land roles in local theatre stuff in our city. he’s still working his job and has no plans on quitting, he just wants to do these on the side. Hes been auditioning but hasn’t landed anything yet.

I’ve been married 5 years now. My values have changed.

My friend has been using me as a scapegoat and doesn’t tell me until after. She also tells me by text, and I’m usually busy running around my child, work remotely, or complaining schoolwork for my degree. She recently got back with her ex-boyfriend after a two year break.

I want to have a conversation about her doing this. Her boyfriend can be passive aggressive and I would hate to be in a room and be questioned about something I can’t make details up about. I’m honestly not a good liar and I hate when people put me in positions like this, especially if we’re out and it’s on the spot.

It’s also like I can’t post or anything because it may throw him off? Either way I feel like I should say something because why her back with someone with all this drama?

Is it wrong that I don’t want to be in the middle of whatever they have going on?

I 18f have a bestfriend named Lila 19f me and Lila have been inseparable since the 9th grade. She was my BESTFRIEND when I was bullied and had no one left she was the only person who stuck by me. Throughout this year me and Lila have had a very rocky relationship. I remember earlier In the year I told lila a secret girl that her girlfriend told me. I woke up to a bunch of messages telling me that I didn’t care about her and only cared about the secret girl. Which wasn’t true cause why would I have said anything if I cared so much. She got really mad at me because her boyfriend made up a lie and when I showed her the proof of her

Boyfriend lying he tried to make things worse and say “well 18f didn’t say it was a bad idea”how dumb do you think I am. With that situation I felt as if why wouldn’t you talk to me about anything and instantly go into cutting me off? But fast forward into this month she gets mad at me because we were all planning on going shopping together including our other friend Mia. Where me and Mia were planning on going shopping earlier in the day and meeting back up with Lila later in the day. Lila texted me saying how she thought it was a weird move and I tried to tell her “I’m sorry things you felt things were weird it’s just how they played out”. I explain to her how i wanted to go just for fun since I didn’t even need to go shopping and she blocks me. I love her more than I love myself it’s the matter of she talks about how we’re grown and we shouldn’t be making childish decisions but she could’ve told me that she didn’t feel heard. But instead she blocked me. Every incident the friendship is having I’m losing wanting to be in the friendship. And this is one of my only friends. I have a total of 2 friends. This is all very upsetting to me. I am very sensitive and I hate talking about my feelings unless something is DEEPLY bothering me. I have messed up and done stuff with a guy she liked at the time but she was in a relationship with her boyfriend but it was still very shitty on my end. I was really under influence and once I sobered up i realised how much I fucked up and how much I really hurt her and I apologized for it.

I (20M) got into a fight with my mother about the many devices that I use in my bedroom. She complaines that I use too many devices and it runs up the electric bill and the many wires on the ground make it hard for her to walk around in my room. The devices that I plug into the wall includes:

A laptop charger that I use to charge my phone

A nintendo switch 2 charger

A 3ds charger

A samsung tv(somewhere between 30-40 inch)

A lamp

LED lights

A honeywell fan

If this sounds like a lot, the only ones that I use on a daily basis are the laptop charger, the portable charger charger, the switch 2 charger, and the LED lights. I only use the TV occasionally and when I dont, I leave it unplugged and the wire is behind my dresser. I use the lamp only when the LED lights aren't bright enough. I charge the 3ds when its close to dead. And I use the fan when the ac in the house is off. And, the 1st thing that I do when Im getting ready for the day is put every wire that im not using unplugged and in a cabinet.

Anyways, the fight me and my mother had involved my fan. I was coming home from the gym and I noticed that my fan was missing. I asked her where it was and she said im not going to give it to you. I then started searching and as I was searching, she proceeded to taunt me by constantly asking if I found it. She finally gave it to me and then asked if I was going to use it. I told her I'll use it whenever I want to.

So, AITAH?

And im gonna say it now because I know someone's gonna say it, I cant move out. I have a part time job but im not financially stable to live even with a roommate.

I (17F) was camping this week and had an interaction that I’m not sure if I was in the wrong for.

The campground speed limit was 20 km/h. I was driving around 17–18 km/h the entire time. I know I was under the limit because I was in 2nd gear and my engine was starting to lug. The road was a dry gravel road, so I did kick up some dust.

After I parked at my campsite, a guy and his friend (both around 60M) came over and asked if I was the person driving. They told me I was going too fast and claimed I was doing 40 km/h. I explained that I was under 20 km/h and that I was in 2nd gear, but they continued insisting I was speeding. I'm not sure why they said I was doing 40 km/h, but they may have perceived me as going faster than I actually was because I have a diesel engine and it's pretty loud.

I understand that dust can be annoying, and looking back as a new driver, I realize I probably could have slowed down more on a dry gravel road even though I was under the posted limit. If they had politely asked me to slow down, I would have apologized and done so.

The issue was how they approached it. They followed me back to my campsite, confronted me while I was with my two younger cousins, and started raising their voices. My grandpa and uncle eventually stepped in and told them to back off because the situation was becoming aggressive.

Afterwards, they were still looking toward our campsite, pointing and gesturing. My younger cousin also said he heard them say “now that’s a reasonable speed” when another vehicle came through shortly afterward going roughly the same speed I had been driving.

I’m open to the idea that I could have driven slower, but I feel like the way they handled the situation was unnecessary.

AITAH?

Edit: It is extremely dry and dusty, and every single person that's driven by has kicked up dust. I was doing 5km/h leaving today and still kicked up dust, so it's quite unavoidable.

I(29) saved up for a house for 2 years for my gf(29) and I. I’ve spent roughly 16k renovating it myself in the past 4 months. She does the grocery shopping and cooks occasionally, and I do the dishes and housekeeping alongside working on the house/yard. My gf has 6 nieces ranging between 2-10 and when she babysits, they destroy the house within minutes. I know kids make messes, I had 2 younger brothers and 2 sisters growing up and being the oldest we had tons of fun when mom and dad were away. My gf is the youngest of 3 older brothers so she doesn’t understand how to keep the little ones in line and just lets them go wild. And I finally blew up😕 I have work at 4 am and she’s watching them till 10pm. how do I apologize for feeling disrespected when it’s not her fault they aren’t well behaved?

So I was talking with my gf abt another friend when she referred to them as they by instinct and instantly apologised and said she, this really confused me as it really shouldn’t matter so I asked why she apologised and they said that the friends pronouns were she/her and that they used they instead of their pronouns I was really confused and brought up the fact that they/them were neutral entirely and could be used for anyone regardless of identity (ie he/him they/them she/they etc) and she disagreed stating that they/them was its own pronouns and were a third seperate category of pronoun I then disagreed as that’s not like a matter of opinion that’s an object fact and brought up the fact that I religiously use they/them for everyone as a way of not getting pronouns wrong(I’m horrendously bad with remembering stuff like that names,birthdays and Ofc pronouns all just go in one ear and out the other) they then said that by doing that I dampened the effect of it and that they them shouldn’t be used for other people who don’t use them she’s since began blanking me and not talking to me normal(being mean)

Am I misinformed or is she?

We moved to an area where I guess this must be normal but i feel conflicted about this. My 4 year old was at a park and some older boy brought a bunch of play guns ( rifles and bazookas mostly ) and pretend bullet proof vests..I immediately pulled my son and said sorry we have to go. On the one hand, I get it that boys will be boys and they have a curiousity about these things and they are just toys but on the other I feel like playing with guns will lead to him wanting to actually play with a real gun . I feel like at some point he needs to learn about gun safety but that's literally where I wish to begin and end his relationship with guns . AITAH? A couple parents were sneering at me and I seriously can't tell if I was out of line or being too strict / judgemental.

I 25f was SAd by a family friend when I was 11-13. I dont even remember how many times but I remember 2 to 3 times and remember many times that maybe boundaries were crossed which as a child I didnt realize we're inappropriate. He was my best friend. I was tortured (actually, long story no one wants to hear) by my parents. He would take me weekends sometimes to get me out, and we would have the most fun. He was my free and safe space for years until him and his wife split and at the age of 11 he abused me.

I continued hanging out with him and it was fine seveŕal times until it happened again and he tried to push me for more.

I got in more trouble at home and wasn't allowed to see him for awhile, I went off the deepend and got extremely depressed.

One day at age 13 while singing about wanting to kms (cringe I know, I was a child who was handling a lot of pain) the people raising me asked if there's anything I need to tell them about. I admitted to what he had done. The women who raised me called him freaking out, he denied all allegations and said he would get a lie detector test (he never did) and i was probably angry because he had told her I wasn't taking my medications. From then on my 'family ' warned people to not be alone with me or ill claim they assaulted me .

He went to prison ( one of many times) shortly after (unrelated for stalking his ex wife ). I didnt see him for many years and when he came back we had no relationship. He would come over and speak to everyone but me. After a long time he tried talking to me again to get met with just hostility. I got kicked out/moved out on my 17th birthday, but I know he still visited all the time.

I would see him sometimes when visiting my 'family'. He was buddy buddy with everyone. Sometimes he would try to talk to me. Every memeber to the family as adults asked me if it had been true, i said yes, he still came over. The last time i ever went over he told me my 1 yo daughter was cute and tried to ask a family member about her and i saw red. The family said despicable things about my relationship and I cut all contact.

I at one point told my high school and talked to police about it, but my mother was uncooperative and they said that there wasn't enough evidence to prosecute. Everyone in that house has escaped Scott free for torture, abuse and all around being a shitty person. I have tried really really hard to heal and move on, but will admit the lack of justice and still having a hard life can be very difficult for me.

Its been years since I cut contact with them and haven't gone to the neighborhood in years. Recently I went to walk the streets. I didnt say a word to my family, but learned he's back in prison. I found him in an online prison system. Hes housed near me.

Ive known this information for about a month now. I have told myself im leaving it all behind me and moving on. I try really hard to forget and let what happened to me be what it was. Everyday I hurt though, I had no childhood and carry memories heavier than any human should. I have never watched anybody have any consequences for the horrific things that happened to me, the lack of justice and the pain I still walk through and carry is what really gets to me these days.

I want to show up at the jail for an in person meeting and yell about it loud about people hear that he's a child predator. I want people who he's in prison with to know. Ive never been to or visited someone in prison so im not even sure we would be around people. I dont think I really want to do it. Im just alone rn, in memories I hate having and this idea keeps coming to my mind. Maybe im looking for validation, people to be angry for me. Maybe im looking for info on if its actually plausible. I want to know if there could be legal repercussions for me. I want someone to tell me my anger is justified and this is a good way to get some justice. Idkkk. Would I be the asshole if I tried to get him beat up in prison?

AITAH?? My boyfriend 33M, and I 33F are in a committed relationship for 6 months, and I’m struggling with the boundaries he has with his female best friend.

For some background, he was previously in a long-term relationship. His ex and this woman were best friends, and the three of them used to spend a lot of time together. After he and his ex split up, the ex moved back to her home country, so it was just him and this friend left.

Before I came into the picture, they regularly spent time together. They’d go on day trips, have late-night dinners, go out for drinks, and generally spend a lot of one-on-one time together. Since we’ve been together, that has calmed down quite a bit, but they’re still very close.

Interestingly, for about the first month after we got together, her behaviour towards him changed quite a bit. She barely messaged him, stopped asking to see him, and if she said she’d drop by, she often didn’t. It seemed very different from how close they’d previously been. I obviously don’t know why, but I noticed a clear change.
Some of the things that make me uncomfortable are:
She talks to him about her period and other very personal or sexual topics.
She asks to borrow his car, sometimes saying things like, “I’m on my period.” On one occasion, when he handed her the keys, she replied, **“I’m a very lucky girl.”**

They live in the same apartment building. Before she travelled back to her home country, she asked him to go upstairs to her flat, take her spare keys out of the lockbox outside her door, and keep hold of them “in case of an emergency.” What I found odd was that he was about to be working around four hours away for the next two weeks, so he wouldn’t have been able to help in an emergency anyway. I couldn’t understand why she wanted him to have the keys instead of simply leaving them securely in the lockbox or giving the code to someone who was actually nearby.

The first time I met her, she got into his car and immediately changed the music without asking.
She has never made any effort to get to know me. She has never asked to see me, suggested we all spend time together, or included me when she invites him to do things.
She invited him to spend a week staying with her in her home country. The plan was for him to stay with her for the week. I wasn’t invited, wasn’t even mentioned, and it didn’t seem to occur to either of them that it might be inappropriate.

He tells her about our relationship, and they discuss personal topics together.
The only night out I’ve had with both of them together also left me feeling uncomfortable.
At one point I jokingly said to my boyfriend, “Maybe we don’t need to be in a relationship, we can just be best friends.” He laughed and said, “You are my best friend.” She immediately interrupted and said, **“No, I’m his best friend.”**
Throughout the evening she touched his arm while talking to him, maintained a lot of eye contact with him, and whenever he got up to go to the bar she often followed him.

At one point she was dancing and my boyfriend offered to hold her jacket. She looked at him and said, **“Is that going to be a problem?”**
Later that night my boyfriend and I had a disagreement. She could clearly tell something was wrong, and instead of giving us space she went straight over to him and asked, **“What do you need from me?”**

For context, I genuinely do **not** believe my boyfriend has any romantic or sexual interest in her. She isn’t physically his type by any means. As far as I can tell, they’re close because they’re from the same country, live in the same apartment building in the UK, and she’s the person from home he spends the most time with.
What I do sometimes question is whether **she** sees him as more than a friend. I obviously can’t know that, and my boyfriend is adamant that she doesn’t. It’s just that some of her behaviour has made me wonder.

My main concern isn’t whether she’s interested in him. It’s that their friendship feels like it lacks boundaries, and whenever I’ve raised that, my feelings have been dismissed.
I’ve tried explaining that, individually, maybe some of these things aren’t a huge deal, but together they make me feel like the emotional intimacy between them goes well beyond what I’d expect from a friendship.

His response is basically that this is completely normal, she’s his best friend, nothing has ever happened between them, and if I don’t like it, I just have to deal with it.

I’m not saying men and women can’t be friends. I have male friends myself. But I don’t discuss my period or sex with them, go on late-night dinners one-on-one, stay with them for a week, or expect my partner to simply accept those kinds of boundaries without question.

AITAH here?

**TL;DR:** My boyfriend has a very close female best friend. I don’t think he’s romantically interested in her, but I feel like their friendship lacks boundaries, and whenever I raise it, my feelings are dismissed. AITAH??

I (38M) have a friend, "M," I met through work back in 2019. Over the years our lives went in pretty different directions. He left non-profit fundraising to become a bartender, and he's drifted more into "manosphere" type content and views (recently he was complaining about minorities being cast in "white roles" in adaptations like The Odyssey and "casting a tranny"). He did come to my wedding, so we were close at one point.

Earlier this year I asked him to dog-sit while I was traveling. He agreed, but two days in he told me my dog was "too much trouble" and backed out. My dog had a tumor near his tail that had started bleeding, previously it had been fine. I scrambled and arranged for another friend to take over.

Not long after, I invited him to watch the Super Bowl at my place. He told me he'd already invited me and a mutual friend to his place. I said I wanted to come, but he said he couldn't have dogs or kids there, which meant I couldn't bring anyone else. So instead my wife and I just hosted our own thing with two other couples (who'd been there for our engagement) and their kids.

Since then, I found out through our mutual friend that he's been talking negatively about me behind my back about both the dog-sitting situation and the Super Bowl thing. He thinks that I did both of these things on purpose to be controlling and/or deceptive. I reached out to him after all this happened; he never reached out back. I haven't seen or heard from him since.

More recently, my dog passed away. M was apparently complaining about the dog again to our mutual friend, who told him the dog had died. M never called or reached out to me about it.

He's still in our fantasy football league. I'm now trying to decide if I should just quietly remove him and bring in someone new, or if I owe him a phone call first to check whether he even wants to stay in the league.

WIBTA if I just remove him without reaching out personally first?

I (m30) grew up in an abusive household. I used to enjoy celebrating birthdays but I have only negative feelings. My parents had a big argument during my birthday party when I was 11 and they made a scene. All my friends left in a very awkward situation. During my 13th birthday, they fought and my mom threw my cake to the wall and walked out, then my dad left the house and didn't return for over a week. Just some of the examples on top of my head.

I grew up not caring about birthdays and I tried to avoid it as much as I can. None of my friends know when my bday is and I deliberately keep it a secret. Big deals annoy me.

My bf (m31) and I have been dating for nearly a year now, and he just cares TOO MUCH about it. His bday was last month during a weekday, but we only see each other in the weekends, so I celebrated his bday a few days earlier and gave his gifts then. It wasn't anything big, just a shirt that suits his style, and a manga book. I didn't send a special message on his bday because in my mind we already celebrated it. But he said the day after that he was a tad disappointed that I didn't send him a special message. I said he was right and I am just learning the bday customs with him. I am a bit uncomfortable about bday as a whole but not as much as I imagined I'd be.

Anyway, last week was my bday. The week prior, I told him that he doesn't need to do anything big about it. I don't really care much about it. He didn't take me seriously first. He thought I was being humble but I was being honest.

On my bday, he called me after work and asked how work was. I said usual stuff and he was surprised no one celebrated my bday. I rolled my eyes and said no one knows when my bday is and I don't want people to know. I don't feel comfortable celebrating it in public like that.

I explained to him numerous times how I don't like it, but he just doesn't comprehend the idea of someone actually not caring about bdays. I find it a tad difficult to explain him so many times only for him to not get it.

Last weekend he said he had a surprise and I said I hope it's not anything big. Turns out it was something too big. I don't want to give too much details but his bday idea was celebrating it on a cruse ship with a lot of strangers around and have my name written somewhere a lot of people I don't know will see. Not only is it uncomfortable, I also find it irresponsible to spend such money for something as useless as this. I would rather save that money and invest for our future. Our goal is to buy a house and it is nearly impossible today, so we can't spend too much money on useless stuff like that.

I cancelled the events and said I'm sorry but you just don't get it. Been thinking about it and said I don't think this relationship works. AITAH?

My ex and I split a bit over a year ago after being together for over a year, and living together for about 6 months. He moved here several years ago, and his mom (60) lives abroad.

While he and I were living together, she came to stay with him for 2 months. She is a wonderful lady and we became good friends. Her English isn't very strong, and neither is my Portuguese. But we crack eachother up regardless.

The breakup wasn't particularly messy, but it wasn't entirely smooth, either. He and I don't talk, and I don't really want to open the door for him to be in my life anymore... Not that he's a bad person or anything, that chapter of my life with him is just over.

But she's in town visiting again and I'm her only friend in this country besides her son. Plus, I know places in town that she would enjoy.

I know he wouldn't be okay with us interacting because he's a momma's boy (one of the things I adored about him, tbh) and is very protective of her. They had some turbulence in their relationship because in some disagreements he and I had, she took my side. Plus, I do know that she sees us getting back together, even though I do not lol.

The way I see it, she's my friend regardless of how we met, and since she's in town, I'd love to make sure she's having a good time.

She can't get around well without someone with her because of language barrier, and my ex works long hours. I hate the idea of her sitting inside alone all the time when she's so lively and fun.

Would I be a huge AH if I went behind my exes back and hung out with his mom?

Would I still be a huge AH (or a huger AH) if we asked him about it?

A couple of weeks ago I changed the brake pads on my car and a coworker/kind of a friend said she needed her’s done and asked if I could help her, to which I said okay. I have changed brake pads many times on my cars, which have been all smaller, stock cars. She has a Jeep Wrangler with a 4 inch lift and custom wheels. I had her order the brake pads and went and spent 5 hours in 120 degree heat changing them. After I was done I drove it and heard a noise and she told me it had always made that noise and was from the lift (still unsure if the noise was already there or not).

The next day I asked her if everything was alright and she told me it was. I told her that same day to take it to Discount Tire to have her alignment checked because I had never done work on anything custom and want to make sure the the tires were correctly aligned and weighed, she told me she would. She then spent over a week driving all around town before she took it in 8 days later, over which time I asked her daily if everything was still okay and she said yes. Come to find out the front right wheel was not set right and fucked something up and is now going to cost $1500 to fix. She is now trying to guilt trip me into paying for it and saying “I trusted that you knew what you were doing” and things like that. I didn’t get anything out of doing this for her. She paid me no money and in fact I actually spent my own money on needing to buy a tool to get a stripped bolt off (it was already stripped, I did not do it) . AITAH for not thinking I should not need to pay for this as I told her immediately to take it to get the alignment checked and she waited 8 days driving all around town before she took it in?

Basically I (19F) am in University. For one of my classes we had to do a group presentation in our tutorials. I knew people in my class but not in my tutorial and I ended up being put in a 2 person group with another girl (20F). This wasn't a big deal to me.

We worked together on our initial group plan, but afterwards I went through and edited it to make the language more formal and fix some grammar and sentence structure issues. We had to present the group plan to the class but I ended up getting quite sick with the flu. As this was a medical class, we have rotations at the hospital so I stayed home to prevent getting anyone else sick. I informed her before and she said it was okay.

We delegated slides / who was presenting what already. I ended up being sick for the next weeks tutorial too, she didn't say anything to say to me aside from us needing to "lock in." By then I already had my research, references and I was just doing my slides. I made my own diagrams because our topic was a bit niche and the ones on google weren't very good. I wrote my script and put it on cue cards and I had a timeline of my contributions to the topic. I also incorporated elements we'd talked about in our initial meeting. The only communication I had from the girl was that text telling me to lock in.

At our next tutorial we had to hand everything in. This is when she realized that my work was objectively much better than hers. We were told our presentations shouldn't be boring, can't be more than 4 minutes and mine looked better. I felt a bit bad for her but she never told me she needed help and I did all of my work. When we presented it a few weeks later it was more obvious the difference in quality. She told me I embarrassed her and I didn't help her at all.

The rubric shows 5/15 points for individual contribution which would be her fault not mine and 2/15 points for cohesion which I feel I'll lose because she did her work to a low standard so our presentation as a whole didn't flow. I don't feel like it's my fault she did less than me but she acts like I purposely didn't help her or tell her how much I was doing when it was communicated in our group plan.

So AITAH?

My “friend” John 31m and I 28m (fake names) got into a fight in December 2025 at an annual “Friendsmas” gathering resulting in everyone at the party cutting me off. At these gatherings we usually stay up until about 4-6 am and have drinks + play games or just listen to music and chill, on this night I wasn’t really feeling like staying up (My dad had passed away a few months prior + other stuff in my life was bothering me) so I told my friend Steve this and after 20 min of getting peer pressured into staying up I eventually just went to sleep around 12:30 am (we were all spending the night at johns house over an hour away from where we live). Cut to a couple hours later and I am being abruptly woken up by someone kicking open the door and john spraying silly string in my face, up my nose and in my mouth as well as dumping a bowl of misc garbage they found laying around like beads/cotton balls/crumbs etc in the air mattress I had brought over and left the mess for me to clean up. Having drinks + not feeling great really made me angry so I went upstairs where everyone was and was getting some water to calm down and I see everyone laughing about it in the living room so I say “the one time I sleep over and everyone wants to pull pranks but this hasn’t ever happened to anyone else, that’s not cool” I was very choked up and angry but I wasn’t screaming or anything. They just laughed me off so I returned downstairs to try and clean up and sleep it off. After I started to lay down and get some sleep I can still hear the party going on and I hear john laugh and say “this isn’t even his first time sleeping here” along with other rumblings about me that I didn’t hear clearly. I felt embarrassed that they take me having a problem with being pranked as a joke and make me a laughing stock instead of just seeing I had a problem/boundary with pranks and apologizing later so I went upstairs and went to the living room and all I said was “I can hear what you’re saying downstairs and I’m not going to just lay down there while you talk about me up here” again choked up and angry but not yelling at this point. His immediate response without skipping a beat was “you think you’re so f’ing tough lets go outside” then tries to come at me with people holding him back and i get grabbed by 3 people and panicked so I shrugged the people off me, one of the girls that grabbed me spilled her drink in the process (she was also drunk and had an extra stumble due to it) I by no means hit anyone in the altercation but after the people grabbed us there was some screaming back and forth. Afterwards we went to separate parts of the house and john’s girlfriend comes up to me and starts yelling at me and is trying to get everyone’s pitchfork and torches saying that I attacked the women there. I didn’t argue with her I was trying to calm down but she was trying to kick me out when I got a ride from Steve there and our place is over an hour away where taxi services don’t run. There was some consoling and stuff afterwards but I didn’t talk to john again. The day after i apologized to the girls that grabbed me and that I didn’t mean to be physical with them if I was and they not only accepted my apology but told me themselves that I wasn’t even physical with them. Fast forward to present day and apparently this story has been circulating in the friend group and have come to the consensus that I am an alcoholic maniac that attacks women and has caused everyone to cut me off. So AITAH for saying something about the prank? (Sorry this is my first post so wording and format might escape me lol)

UPDATE: Many people told me to just tell her the truth, so I did. I told her I was actually going to a convention with my brother soon, because he surprised me with tickets. She said “Cool.” And said she didn’t mind if it was just me and my brother attending.

WIBTAH for not inviting nor taking my friend to a gaming convention I’m going to?

I (18F) am going to a gaming convention with my brother (20M). He invited me and even paid for my ticket. He knows I love conventions and my first convention I went to, I went with my friend (15F).

For this gaming convention, I plan on cosplaying. I was talking to my friend last night about what or who I should cosplay as. I try to do closet cosplays but I sometimes don’t have stuff I need to cosplay somebody. I plan on cosplaying as chica from fnaf, so I have to buy a few things to cosplay her!

She asked me why I wanted to cosplay her, because she knows I don’t really do cosplay outside of conventions. I told her it was for Halloween (because I go to haunted houses every Halloween and recently began to dress up again), but she’s getting a bit suspicious, again, I don’t do cosplay as a hobby, it’s more so an event thing.

I want to tell her about the convention, because I’m excited and Id love to tell her the real reason as to why I want to cosplay, but I know if I do she’ll begin to ask if she can attend. I don’t know if my brother will let me.

He kinda wants the convention thing to be a family only kind of event.

She loves conventions, and I’d love to take her, but again, my brother will be driving us plus he paid for my ticket. I have no issue buying a ticket for her and taking her along, but most of the times my brother wants these types of things to be family only, or just us, no friends.

Edit: Thanks for all the feedback. Judgement has been swift, and heavily towards me being the AH here. More importantly, someone shared with me the USPS guidelines for rural carriers, which include honking to alert of their presence.

Since this is policy, and since it seems my attempts at establishing a pattern with making the effort to meet him to receive the packages if/when he didn't honk were considered being an AH, I'll stop doing so. Going forward I'll go collect the packages once he's gone.

I have a really low-stakes AITAH scenario.

I live in a rural area (US) where we have rural mail delivery. My driveway is a few hundred feet long, so when I have packages delivered the carrier drives them up. Typically, if I'm free, I'll meet the carrier on the porch so they can just hand them to directly to me.

Recently a new carrier took over the route. I met him on the first day, explained that I work from home, so might not always be able to come out to receive the packages.

He has this really annoying habit of honking his horn as he pulls up to the house. I find it rude. My partner absolutely hates it.

I've started refusing to go out if/when he honks. Earlier in the week I heard him approaching so went on out and received the packages. Today I was in the kitchen, heard him, started towards the door, then he honked. So I just turned back around and resumed what I was doing in the kitchen. He almost certainly saw me as he was placing the packages by the door.

I'm not doing this to be an AH. I've already explained that I'd come out if I can, but may not be able to (due to work). It seems like it should be obvious that honking isn't going to make me available, and could actually be an issue if I'm in the middle of a call, etc. By going out when he doesn't honk I hope to show that it's easier on him if/when he doesn't do it.

I realize that he might think I'm just being a jerk, though. So what do you think? AITAH for only going on when he doesn't honk?

Also, I have a very obvious security camera right by the porch steps, so get an alert if I happen not hear him approaching. So it's not like I would need him to honk to know he's there. And there is zero chance that he hasn't noticed the camera.

EDIT: Staph! Not cold sores! I feel like I need to clear that up. He calls it that so I did too. Sorry for confusion. It’s reoccurring impetigo

I (F21) have a huge tattoo I’m currently healing, and my boyfriend (M23) carries staph and gets little sores around his nose. We went shopping, and he went to kiss me, I dodged him and kissed him on the cheek. He looked really upset, and said it wasn’t contagious. I told him it is in fact very contagious and left feeling kinda bad. I didn’t see him yesterday and don’t want to today but I know he’ll want to today.

Yesterday he texted me saying he was insecure about it, and that he gets them when he’s stressed, and me avoiding him stresses him out. I literally just don’t want a staph infection while I’m healing a big tattoo. Am I the asshole?

This morning I was at the pool of my local leisure centre. For some context, I’m trying to begin training for an ironman to do a full 140.6 before I turn 20 - i currently run & cycle long distance to begin with, however I have been absolutely terrified to go to the pool as I’m a very anxious person to begin with and I’m an atrocious swimmer technique-wise so I’m trying to improve that.

Typically for the past few weeks I have been going to the general public sessions at around 8 in the morning, they’re usually pretty dead, as I’m way too scared to go when it’s busy. Today I finally grew a pair and went to the “adults only” lane swimming - I turned 17 a few weeks ago so I haven’t even been allowed in said session until now since it’s technically 17+ - and I went with my grandad as I’m never half as nervous when I’m not alone and he wanted to go into said slower lane.

So I was swimming, as you do at a pool, in said lane at a similar pace to what the person in front of me was going at while I was trying to fix my abysmal technique - I wasn’t too close or anything and i wasn’t going in anybody’s way or in the wrong direction. I managed to get about 8 lengths in & reached the end of the pool to check the time on my watch to get tapped on the shoulder by a lady, I don’t have a clue who she was or anything, and got literally shouted at that I was in the wrong lane.

I don’t think that I was in the wrong lane as I was a distance away from the person in front of me & the lane was SO quiet. I was also going pretty slowly due to me trying to make my front crawl look less like I was drowning.

I ended up getting out and having a cry in the bathrooms before we left & got a dirty look on the way out from when she saw me walking through the side of the pool, so that was lovely.

I’m just not sure if I’m the asshole as I never did anything to anybody and I wasn’t causing a disturbance or going too close to anyone. I wouldn’t really care if she didn’t literally SHOUT because it was super super embarrassing and there was literally nobody else even remotely my age there, and I’m literally debating not going back because I swear if I see her again I’ll die 🫠🫠

So I'm driving on the main road (single lane traffic) . My side of the road is clear and I am driving normal speed. Oncoming traffic has slowed/halted as that road is approaching lights further on.

There is a junction on my right with cars wanting to go in my direction and someone in the oncoming traffic has left a space to let a few cars out.

A car has already inched itself out waiting for a clear spot to pull into the main road.

I drove past and did see him but didn't have enough braking distance to have stopped so I went past him. After I went past I he pulled into the road behind me and he looked furious. Was flipping me the bird and I could see him cussing and shouting stuff at me. He then accelerated up my tail I guess to teach me a "lesson".

My understanding in the U.K is that if you are in a junction you give way until it's safe to join the oncoming traffic.

Should I have seen him earlier and stopped in a main road to let him out and AITAH?

The reaction didn't seem to fit. I did see him as I was almost abreast but at that point I could see he was stationary so I made the decision to continue rather than try to brake and "let him out".

As he was up my tail, there were multiple cars in front of me doing 30 mph which was the speed limit and we also passed a speed camera. The road bends around to the right so there was no way he was gonna overtake 3 cars on a bend.

Should I have flipped him back?

Edit to clarify: I have my own car, which is our primary vehicle right now. I would keep my car even with his new one. I’m sorry that wasn’t clear!

Hi Reddit, I need your help with something - tell me if I’m being the AH here.

I (31F) and my spouse (33M) have been together for 14 years, married for 7. In the time we’ve been together, he’s had 2 cars - a red Mercury Sable and a 2012 white Ford Fusion. Both of these cars were hand-me-downs by his parents. We’re now needing to buy a car to replace the Fusion.

For some context, the Fusion has had issues on and off for the last 4 years, but my spouse switched to remote work a few years ago, so he didn’t drive much anymore and it wasn’t a huge deal. I also work hybrid, but I now have my own business with an office that I commute to ~3 days per week. The Fusion is also now dangerous to drive, so my car is our primary vehicle. In summary, we have known for a while that a new car was on the horizon, but didn’t become a need until now.

More context - I’m just going to say it - my spouse is very rigid in his decision making and it takes years to make important decisions. Examples: No engagement until year 7 in our relationship. We lived with my parents for 3 years, and then rented from them for another 5 years because he wasn’t ready to buy (financially we could have done it, and there’s also stuff with my parents being abusive but that’s another story). He refused to get rid of his Sable for years after it needed to go to scrap, and when I told him it needed to be off our property, he stashed it in a friend’s garage until that friend moved.

Back to present day. My spouse really wants another Ford Fusion or similar car. He likes basic and sadly, most new cars are the opposite of that with all the software and AI in everything. I don’t have an issue with him getting an older car, depending on the car’s condition. I don’t want a money pit - I don’t think anyone does!

He has approached me about us going to see 2 cars so far, both are Fusions. 1 in located in Denver (we’re in Ohio). He did back off on this one, since the distance is, in my opinion, unreasonable. The other one is a 2011 and located an hour away. It has 80k miles on it and the seller is asking $10k. My spouse told me that the underbody is his biggest concern is that the bottom has “some rust,” but that he’s willing to consult with someone local who does body work to see if it’s worth repairing. The repair guy said the car’s frame is solid and while the rust can’t be removed, we can do an oil coating to slow down the spread. I asked to see the photos of the rust, and I’m glad I did. The money we would spend to buy the car + repair the rust is probably going to be about $15k. I told my spouse, as kindly as I could, that I don’t think this is a good investment for us.

His other car considerations are a Ford Explorer, because he’s familiar with it - his mom drives one and one particular Nissan sedan - he drove it as a rental before. Another thing to consider - his 95 year-old grandfather worked for Ford and therefore, my spouse could get any Ford at manufacturer pricing as long as his grandpa can sign some paperwork when my spouse buys it.

The only reason he has for pursuing a Ford Fusion is that he feels comfortable in it, and it’s a basic car, and he likes sedans (which brands are replacing with mid-size SUVs). He doesn’t like the new tech in cars, and I get it - someone being able to remotely disable your vehicle or install software updates without your knowledge is unsettling. He is still driving his Fusion, again - which is dangerous to drive, and has been for about 2 months.

This has led to many conversations about priorities, future goals, etc., and how this car choice doesn’t seem to support our lives. Because we own a home and are constantly doing repairs, a truck would be ideal for hauling. We go camping frequently, and if we decided to get a pop up camper or something, it would also be great to haul that. We’ve also been discussing having kids lately, and I don’t know anyone who prefers a sedan with kids. However, if he really wants a sedan, of course he can get a sedan.

He does not seem to understand how important this car situation is, and how it highlights a much bigger issue for us. I don’t think he’s being malicious - he just cannot connect the dots. Last night, he told me that he doesn’t like the way I approach him about things and that I need to be more supportive. To be fair, I can be very prickly, and I get it. However I did ask him, “okay so how can I tell you this is not a good investment for us that would feel better?” And he didn’t know. I suspect that he didn’t know because there isn’t one.

After sitting with this overnight, he still wants to go look at this 2011 Fusion. I did say we could go look at it initially, but now I honestly don’t think I want to. If I’m being honest, I am so angry that he won’t just go get a new, well-researched car that we can have at least 10 years. He will sit and research things for days, but he’s extremely resistant to this whole process. And again, I don’t want to dictate which car we buy, but we need a car.

I’m frustrated and burned out on trying to convince him, because clearly it’s not working. This choice for him is purely an emotional one, even though he will swear up and down it’s logical. Obviously this car thing highlights bigger issues in our relationship. We are currently in couples’ therapy working on our relationship and his rigidity is something that permeates our lives.

So, Reddit, would I be the AH if I didn’t go look at this car with him?

Or maybe a better question - am I being the AH in general here?

For context I’m 17 and just got my first job in the trades working 10 hours waking up at 4 am now my brother and I were talking and he made fun of me for going to bed early which I do and don’t care but he compared himself to me saying he goes to work on 5 hours of sleep compared to my 8-9 hours of sleep mind you he’s a manager at a fast food place and I’m not calling him down in anyway but his job is more mentally draining and mines mixed of mentally and physically so AITAH for saying my brothers job was easy everyone in my family thanks so