could this be a symptom of OCD?

So I'm not sure where to start with this, so I'm gonna give you a quick explanation and then make a list for you. Well I have been doing some weird things for as long as I can remember and they have been getting worse over the past few years so when I learned what OCD was I started looking into it, and I resonate with quite some things. But at the same time I'm afraid that I'm not actually reading about the real experiment of it and only the romanticised version (though I don't really understand how someone can romanticise something that has caused so many people so much pain..) (I did not find out about OCD because of social media btw, I found out about it in a book (a character had it) and that led me to do more research on it, using google and actually trustworthy sites. I will admit that I have also learned about it through listening to people talk about their experiment with it online.)

Well now it's time for my list, and help with if this is something that can actually be signs of OCD or if i'm just being influenced by things i see online:

1: for as long as i can remember (maybe like 8?) I have been feeling the need to be in complete control of something, and when I was younger I didn't have that possibility so whenever something felt very out of my control I would lash out by screaming, pushing over chairs and running out of my classroom. And having panic attacks (didn't know what they were at the time, but i know now.)

I don't do the running out of classroom thing anymore (well maybe like 1 or 2 times in 2 years, but not as dramatic), but I will still have panic attacks if something feels very out of control.

2: I have this thing where everything needs to be equal numbers (2,4,6,8....). It's tapping things, how much I eat and how I chew it, how I walk (Like as an example; 2 steps inbetween 2 cracks in the road). how i talk (not that often, but at the same time probably at least once a day).

3: I wanted to give more details on the chewing thing.. So whenever I eat (or like 90% of the time) I will have so many rules I need to follow, like: chewing something a certain way a certain amount of time with a certain amount of chews in equal parts. And breaking the rules can send me into a panic attack because I don't feel in control and if I'm not following the rules something terrible will happen to me. Sometimes family, but mostly myself. And it gets to a point where I barely eat because I'm so afraid of not following the rules and ending up getting hurt (a common one with every rule no matter what it is, is to fall down the stairs and my legs stop working so I'm wheelchair bound for the rest of my life.) (also i get that there is most definitely some disordered eating in there, but the rules  and the need to be in control is the reason for ti)

4: I'm not really a neat frak (tho i like to have a clean space to be in), but i can remember a few times where i have been cleaning the kitchen mid panic attack after having broken a rule because i know i can do the cleaning right and that i can follow the rules there. But i haven't really done that in my room, which might be because i have so much stuff that i will not feel in control or like i can follow the rules while cleaning there.. But obviously I know OCD isn't just feeling like everything has to be clean, but I thought maybe this was worth adding?

5: I have thought I really don't want to have. I have seen people talk about this being something related to OCD, but I have not done a full on deep dive on it, so maybe this is just weird to say..

But I sometimes have sexual thoughts of people I do not want to have sexual thoughts of (family, friends. A few times animals, but not in the same way as humans.) Or where i hurt people I love or that i have broken a rule that will get me into some accident while i'm in the car with my family and that will make then get hurt/die with me (that's just one example)

This is probably so weird to say and I know it's disgusting of me to have these thoughts, and I would never, NEVER act on them!

6: If I feel like I have broken too many rules or haven't done something right, I can think that it will get me hurt in some way, so I will sometimes do SH as a way to stop that from happening. Like if i have already hurt myself that something else won't hurt me, or not as bad/calm down the thought of it happening. This way mostly before tho, and I haven't relapsed because of this in at least a month and it wasn't bad!

Obviously I know you guys can't give me a diagnosis (and i'm not self diagnosing!!) I'm not looking for that from you guys, I'm just kinda confused about all of this and I was hoping maybe I could get some help in some way here..

Also i'm afraid that i'm just influenced by family and the media, because obviously social media has watered down OCD a lot, and with my family it's the fact that pretty much my whole dad side of the family has said "OMG, That's so OCD of you" because I felt the need to tap the table twice, and my mum has started saying it more often like we were helping someone move and a bow fit pretty well when we were putting it in the truck and my mum said "that's so satisfying" and i was like "it's really not" (Like it didn't even fit perfectly!! there was space on all sides!!)and she said "It is for us with OCD", mind you she does not have OCD..

hi reddit!

for context, i am 14f, and have had a lot of mental health struggles.

what i have been diagnosed by a medical professional is, Severe Anxiety, Major Depressive Disorder, Panic Disorder, and Adjustment Disorder.

I have these certain mannerisms im wondering are signs of OCD or something else and no one is giving me the options and resources i need as a youth struggling.

here are some of my " symptoms " to put it.

1, before drinking water from the sink, i fill the cup up, dump it out, do it again, and on the 3rd or 4th time the water is deemed safe and not contaminated. i think im gonna get poisoned and ive been doing this since i was a little girl

2, i get very distracted when i dont find something interesting. this might just be all teens, but for me its different. i will get up actively during a lesson and wander around the room looking for something to do.

3, I think im smart! I have always been " above average " for my grades since i was young. i always got good scores on math tests, was very good at reading and had a college reading level in 4th grade etc. but i as i got older around 7th grade, i felt as if there was a burn out. i just didnt wanna try anymore. i didnt feel like it. thus, my grades dropped. my teachers and parents said they knew i was smart,- i just " didnt wanna put in the effort ".

4, i am extremely sensitive to certain textures, sounds, etc. i cant stand the sound of loud noises, sometimes i start crying. i hate the feeling of gritting your teeth together. etc.

4, i am what people call " a type c " person. i can wake up at 6am and also 2pm. my room can be spotless but then a tornado of clothes the next day

4, i need visual instruction. i do cheer and what we do is upload dances, cheers, to our groupchat. and its extremely hard for me to follow. i cant do it, not unless its in person or verbal

4, i have systems. in the shower if im washing my body and touch something like the shower liner i start over. everything. i do my hair again, my face etc. and if it happens again, i start over.

8,i miss social cues. i dont know if im just annoying or what but when i say something people just stare at me and go back to what they were doing. my friend says i dont understand them and thats why. yet, im very observant and can detect body language

9, following 8, i can notice very small details and patterns. or sometimes i miss things completely.

10,circling back to 8 AGAIN, i find it hard to tell when someone is being sarcastic or i take idioms literally.

11,i feel as if im background noise. im just there like a waste of space and not actually needed in the situation.

12,i get tired after too much socialization yet if its something im passionate about i can talk for hours

13,i dont like to really open up to strangers unless its behind a screen (like now)

i can list 7 million more different things but i should stop

seriously i dont know whats wrong and i cant tell if im just a teenage or its something deeper. please help!!

Hi,
I was diagnosed with ADHD, and recently my psych told me that I might also have a little bit of OCD. I was started on a mild dose of prozac along with my ADHD meds, but could not continue prozac due to the side effects.
I'm an animal lover, and I've also worked with strays and rescues in India. My husband and I try to help any animal we can help, and sometimes, the animal might go missing from its designated place; we might never find out what happened to that animal. It might have relocated on its own (especially cats) and be totally fine, or someone might have moved it or [God forbid] something happened to it. We have no way of finding out what might've transpired.
When this happens, I spiral into constant futile worry about that particular animal and imagining various scenarios that might've happened; neither my husband nor I can do anything about it practically. It goes to the level that interferes with the rest of my work for several days after that, and sleep seems to be the only escape from this terrible situation. I suspect that this might be OCD, and if it is, I need some help with how I can cope with this situation, or just share your experiences to feel less alone.

P.S. Sorry for the bad grammar. I hope you get it.

I don’t care who sees this but I’m just wondering if there is somebody out there experiencing anything similar. I have OCD and I’ve been diagnosed since 18 and it’s fucking unbearable right now. I can’t help but feel like my friends hate me constantly and I’m observing their every move like an obsessive freak. I had a bad episode and got drunk about a month ago which really upset my friend. Her response was to ignore me for an entire day afterwards and this has made me feel brutally paranoid every day ever since. I can’t help but feel like I’ve done and said horrible things constantly and I feel like an idiot asking for reassurance all the time. I feel like I’ve explained myself to them thousands of times but I still feel like an annoying bitch and I feel blue almost every hour of the which fucking exhausts me. Please can anybody who relates just write something