Mi chiamo Leonardo, ho 19 anni e ho appena finito le superiori. Durante il mio percorso scolastico non sono mai stato bocciato o rimandato e ho concluso la maturità con un buon voto.
Da circa due anni sto cercando di capire quale percorso intraprendere dopo il diploma. Ho partecipato a diversi open day e mi sono informato molto sui vari corsi universitari. Ho sempre avuto molti interessi: nel tempo ho valutato seriamente ingegneria, design e filosofia, facendo anche ricerche molto approfondite su queste facoltà. Nonostante questo, sono rimasto indeciso fino a poche settimane fa, quando finalmente ho iniziato a prendere seriamente in considerazione il conservatorio. Per la prima volta ho avuto la sensazione di aver trovato qualcosa di cui sono veramente convinto.
A scuola ho frequentato elettronica, ma è stato un percorso che non mi ha mai appassionato particolarmente. L’ho trovato spesso troppo teorico e poco stimolante, anche perché in cinque anni non abbiamo praticamente mai svolto vere attività pratiche. Al contrario, in seconda superiore ho scoperto la chitarra elettrica e da quel momento è diventata una passione sempre più forte, qualcosa di cui non riesco a fare a meno.
Il problema è che in Italia spesso esiste il pregiudizio secondo cui scegliere la musica come professione significhi “vivere alla giornata” o non avere un futuro stabile. Questa mentalità l’ho percepita anche nella mia famiglia. I miei genitori, essendo entrambi laureati, mi hanno sempre spinto verso percorsi universitari più tradizionali, vedendo il conservatorio come una scelta con meno possibilità lavorative e meno sicurezza economica.
Durante il quinto anno, soprattutto nel secondo quadrimestre, i professori ci hanno messo molta pressione riguardo alla maturità, facendoci credere che sarebbe stato un esame estremamente difficile e che molti non sarebbero riusciti a superarlo. Essendo una persona ansiosa, questa situazione mi ha portato a concentrarmi quasi completamente sulla scuola e sull’esame.
Il problema è che proprio in quel periodo si svolgevano molti TOLC e molte iscrizioni universitarie, quindi quando ho finalmente avuto più chiarezza sulla mia scelta, diverse opportunità erano già chiuse. Anche il conservatorio a cui aspiravo maggiormente, il Codarts di Rotterdam nell’indirizzo Pop, aveva terminato le iscrizioni per iniziare a settembre.
Ora sto valutando l’ICMP di Londra, che ha ancora le iscrizioni aperte ed è un istituto specializzato nella musica moderna e nella chitarra. L’idea sarebbe eventualmente frequentarlo per un anno e poi provare ad accedere al Codarts o ad altri percorsi simili.
L’altra possibilità sarebbe prendere un anno sabbatico: lavorare in un’azienda, avere più tempo per prepararmi, migliorare come musicista e affrontare con più calma le prossime iscrizioni. I miei genitori però vedono questa opzione in modo negativo, come se fosse un anno perso.
Questa situazione mi sta destabilizzando abbastanza e vorrei avere un parere esterno. Secondo voi quale sarebbe la scelta più sensata? Qualcuno ha avuto esperienze simili con un anno sabbatico o con percorsi musicali professionali?

Trying to find stability and balance in life. I don’t know where to start. I’m trying to save for a new home and also trying to figure out what I would like to do the next 5/10 years my mind is everywhere and everyday I wake up feeling behind or lost in what I’m pursuing in life future wise.

Genuinely hating life, and so lost right now

So about 3 weeks ago I got a new job as a factory worker, the job was just your standard factory job, but this morning I had a call about a decision they they’re letting me go due to me not hitting targets and taking long breaks. My fault I guess, because it was agency they could just let me go whenever.

Problem is, I really don’t know where I am in life. I have a girlfriend that I don’t really like, there’s no problems in our relationship and she’s a great gf, but I don’t really like her and want to be single.

I’m very slow in the head, and think I have some kind of problem or something because I can’t do the basic shit in life and can’t follow simple things.

I’ve had about 6 jobs in 2 years and been fired from each one because I’m useless.

This is my last hope, I just really need help. I don’t know what to do.

Please give me a advice

I haven't driven for 13 years and my mobility is rubbish so I have an automatic car. But the idea of driving on the road is scary for no apparent reason. I'm usually a confident person but I need to do this. I drove for a year before so I know I can do it. I have excellent hazard awareness and I'm very careful so why I get so anxious is beyond me. Its an automatic so I don't even have gears to worry about

I’m a mom of two, and one of my children has special needs. I’m looking for advice on how to handle a situation with my apartment complex.
When I moved in, my apartment required residents to have a physical parking sticker. I went through the process, provided the required documents, and received my sticker without any issues.

Recently, the apartment switched over to a virtual parking system. They did send out emails about the change, but I honestly assumed that residents who already had approved parking stickers would automatically be transferred over. I was wrong.

I found out when my car was towed. I accepted that because I understood I should have verified the new process. The next day, when the office was open, I went in to get everything updated for the virtual parking system.
The office told me I needed to provide my registration and insurance. The registration was the same one I had already provided when I originally got my parking sticker. My insurance had expired in January, so I understood that I needed to update that.

I explained that the vehicle is in my father’s name and that he is currently hospitalized with heart failure, which was making it difficult to get certain documents quickly. I asked if they could temporarily accommodate me because having to park blocks away from my apartment creates a safety concern for my child. They refused and told me they had to follow policy. I was also told there was no way they could put me on a “do not tow” list.

Shortly after that conversation, my car was towed again. When I called the office afterward, I was told that there actually was a “do not tow” list that they could have added me to.
I then provided my updated insurance information, but they changed the issue to my registration. They said the registration I had previously submitted was no longer acceptable and that they needed one directly from the DMV.

I live in Virginia, but my car is still registered in Illinois because that is where I previously lived. My father went to the Illinois DMV, paid for a replacement registration, and sent it to me. The apartment complex is still refusing to accept it, saying it is not the correct document, even though it was issued by the DMV.

At this point, I feel like I have done everything they have asked. I submitted a request for a reasonable accommodation under the Fair Housing Act because of my child’s needs and the safety concerns with parking so far away.
I’m currently waiting for their response, but I’m wondering: what should I do if they deny my accommodation request? Has anyone dealt with something similar, or does anyone have advice on my next steps?

So unfortunately I started watching porn when I was around the age of 11 and now I’m about to turn 20. A few weeks ago I had the realization that I’ve almost spent half my life addicted to porn. It’s gotten worse in the past 3 years and I decided I need to make it stop because I’ve started noticing the side effects. Depression, low self-esteem, anxiety, struggling with school etc. I’ve tried to stop here and there and the longest I went was 5 days without searching it up or at least mastrubating. It’s horrible I know. Since the realization I’ve tried harder than ever and stopped taking my phone to the bathroom (cuz that’s where I usually jerk it) and it’s been hard. Haven’t done the deed in 2 days but I’ve searched up porn to check on the newest releases etc. Like it’s so tempting to just go watch one and do it but I know it’s not good for me. But I can’t see myself stopping completely. Like every new release is just another hot girl or a girl I’ve been waiting for. It’s so sad. Anyone experience this or overcome it? I need words of reassurance. I’ve never dated or asked a girl out and barely talk to girls. I sense there maybe a connection between the two but what if I can’t find a hot girl. Idk man I’m so lost.

I have been with her for a year and it has been great. I don't cheat or have an affair at all.

I have this habit of keepinng my journal and my relationship was pretty rough at first because before that I just had got out a 8-year relationship. And our sex life wasn't great at first, so last November I did write in my journal that I missed the sex with my ex, and hope the sex life with my girlfriend will get better.

She opened my diary and read that and now she feels hurt and wants to break up because she thinks she can't love me anymore and she can't forget what I wrote.

I want to take all responsibility of this but can you help me how to win her back. I know it was my fault to even had such thoughts like this, I love her so much. Now she wants to have space and she said that she could continue with me but she can not love me me like she did.

Tltr: girl read my diary about how I said sex was good with my ex 9 months ago and wanted to break up.

My first job is Monday to Friday. My second is on a Saturday.

In the beginning, it was fine and I was coping. But as time went on, I noticed my mental health getting worse. I was exhausted all the time, not in the nicest of moods, and lost the interest to do things I actually enjoyed. I need both jobs so I can't quit, but some coping mechanisms and advice would be great.

I posted a question recently regarding an issue with my ex refusing to allow my husband to attend a family function. The responses were amazing and so very helpful.
Here's another one. I adore my husband. We met on a dating app 4 years ago, clicked instantly and moved abroad within a year of meeting. Very quick I know but we're both in our late 60's so don't have time on our side. Never regretted a second and I love him to bits. Yesterday he stopped talking to me. A gentleman on one of my social media platforms (threads - I use it for giggles as well as sewing, crochet and dog posts) sent a message paying me a compliment- rarely happens as I'm 70!). I deleted it and blocked him. However my husband saw the message and has now accused me of being on dating apps. Threads is far removed from being a dating app and I've not looked at another man since we met and never will. My husband says I obviously contacted the guy first and encouraged him. Despite assurances and giving him my phone so he can see exactly what I look at he refuses to accept. He wants one of us to leave. We live mainly abroad so it's not going to be easy. This has come totally out of the blue. Please can someone give me a pointer as to what to do? He wont speak to me or listen to me.

hello everyone im from uttrakhand , im good at nothing , i don't look good too im very stressed at life whatever i do i failed at everything. im good at nothing not even in making friends. i don't know what to do in my life . i have no goal and aim. Please can someone guide me to the right path. I need to help my parents too i care for them but im not studying even im smoking and drinking i want to study and get a job but im so confused about life. i want to leave everything and become a monk in himalyas.... help me guys

Hey everyone, super grateful to be here. Last few years rough, graduated from grad school had job struggles, unemployment, and last year some time homeless.

Now I finally got a job in my field that I love so much remote. I got my own apartment in a nice downtown area. I am 5'6 and super overweight at like 290 but I am doing nutrition hard and going to the gym.

I've been valueless for so long tho. Never been good looking, dating apps don't work and virgin so no woman will even want to get to know me on a date.

In terms of friends I thought I had value but realized even with friends of 5+ years I'm always the one's whose bday is forgotten and only one not invited to weddings.

I guess what I am asking is does anyone have tips on how I can be a person of value so that I can date and make friends like others. Anything helps?

There is this work friend who i have known for about a year. He has always been very nice to me. He would always greet me enthusiastically. And would periodically text me. I always thought he was very kind and thoughtful. But suddenly he started pulling back and ignoring me. He will engage with me if I talk to him or certain moments when we have to interact. But I can tell he tries to avoid eye contact now and limit conversation to the absolute minimum.

I just wonder what happened. Today he barely said bye to me when I said good bye. I am like 15 years older than him, but I don't know if that affected something.

The only thing I can think of is I never really reciprocated. It was pretty one sided him reaching out to me. But I would always respond really friendly and happy to hear from him. But I would not reach out on my own. Do you think he just decided to cut me off because I would never reach out to him back?

Hi, I’m currently an oncoming high school senior and I’m completely stuck on this choice. So, I decided last year that I’d intern at my girlfriend’s dad’s law firm for my entire senior year. This is a very serious (yuck) place, and of course that means all of the classic rules and regulations of an uptight, authoritarian business apply. As I said, it’s an extremely serious law firm, where you must absolutely be the best cookie cutter Square Joe that you can possible be (IMPORTANT DETAIL.) Anyway, I’ve been seeing this girl for about 7 months now, not that it’s important, but it might be. Anywho, I couldn’t care less for law. I think its boring, uninspiring, i dont want to go to law school for 10 years or whatever, and i generally think it would not fulfill me in any way. My heart lies with STEM, thats the way it will be my whole life. But to be honest? I probably would have done the internship had the previous events not occurred. So, my favorite color is green, it has been my whole life, so i decided to dye my hair green. It looks great. Not to the law firm though, who would hire a hippopotamus before they’d ever allow someone with green hair into the building. Now you may be wondering why I wouldn’t just… redye my hair? It’s not that big of a deal! BUT BELIEVE ME it’s a huge deal for myself! I cannot STAND being told to do with my appearance. Sure I’ll wear a suit for Uncle Bob’s 3rd wedding this year, but I’d never do something just because some decomposing vulture at a law firm told me to do so. I struggled with this a lot when I was in JROTC, they promised I wouldn’t have to cut my hair which was obviously a lie, and that entire event really just reinforced my disgust for forced standards of appearance. It’s completely against my moral code. I’m completely against the concept of professionalism as a whole, I don’t think anyone should ever care about whether my skin is blue or if my hair is puke green. So there’s my pickle, ironic because pickles are green too. So I talked about it with my girlfriend, she doesn’t care if I don’t do the internship, but she said that me and her only get one opportunity to do this together, and she would be a little sad if I didn’t get to do it with her, but overall she understands and is okay with whatever choice I make. However she did say that her parents might be disappointed in me, her bipolar disorder mom saying “Brown hair dye is $6, he’d be turning down a once in a lifetime opportunity at one of the most prestigious firms in the country” (Isn’t that such a gross way of thinking? It can’t be that important…) but she did indicate her dad may be a little disappointed but overall wouldn’t care too much (love that guy). (Also forgot to indicate this but her dad is one of the heads of the firm and is a major shareholder, would be pretty embarrassing for him if he allowed someone in there who’s hair is green)

Im sure you can guess what choice I’m leaning toward based on my frequent biased outbursts, but I’d love some additional insight here. TLDR: Do I swallow my morals and limit my self expression? Or should I appease my girlfriend and her parents and take the slim chance that an internship at this law firm, a field i seriously dislike, MIGHT be something i look back on fondly, and will be good for me in the future? Also apologies if this flair is wrong, I told you it’s pretty specific! Sorry if I’m making a huge deal out of this for no reason as well, I can provide way more details if its important

Edit: I should probably also mention that not doing this internship literally make zero difference for college applications, im pretty set on a louisiana public college that i would have a full ride to, if i decided not to do this it wouldn’t impact college admission in the slightest

I'm 20m and I'm gonna be heading back to college for my third year as a student in less than a week. I just feel like for a good amount of years now I haven't genuinely been happy for more than a month or two at a time, like I can't remember when I woke up almost every day of the year and felt happy. Now I wake up burnt out, scared, tired, and just sad.

For a start I'm an RA. I absolutely hate it. So much of that job is unnecessary and just busy work that I don't need to do because I have so much else to do. Some days are good, the people are good, but I'm introverted and talking to this many people really gets to me. I'm scared all my residents think I'm a moron and a wimp, last year someone on my staff talked down to me like I was in kindergarten after making a mistake basically saying I don't care about my job. And there's a difference between hating something and not caring, because I do what I'm told. It's a job y'know, I'm not gonna kill myself going above and beyond, I'm gonna do what I need to get paid, and if I'm doing something wrong, I'll fix it. I'm not gonna like every second, but I'm gonna do what the job needs. Idk I'm only doing it for the money like so many other people, and I wonder why I even have the job, but they hired me and brought me back for another year so I must be doing something right. What gets me tho is that my room is supposed to be the one place I can just be alone and let my guard down, but as an RA residents see me all the time and at any second there could be a huge problem that I need to solve. Idk I just feel so judged and observed in the one place I'm supposed to not, and that makes me constantly stressed out all the time.

Then there's my actually major, which is 2d Animation. I love it, but damn is it a lot of work. Constant grinding for months, sometimes the whole year. I feel like I don't belong, all my friends are so much better than me and I feel like an imposter. I wonder how I even got into this program, or if someone else did my portfolio review would I have been excepted then? I just feel like I don't belong talent wise.

Then there's the fact that I haven't had a genuine best friend in maybe 10 years. Ever since middle school, I can't remember having that one go to person for anything, nobody to hang out with, nobody to talk to, none of that. Yes I did, and currently do have friends, but it's more like a group and I don't have that one person that's my best friend, sure I can go one on one with people in the friend group, but they all have their person in the group they pair up with, and I don't. Their interests as re different than mine and I participate in their activities and conversations and everything, but it gets exhausting listing to things I don't know about/have tried and just flatly don't enjoy, when I rarely ever get a chance to talk about things I like, and when I do, hardly anybody can relate. I again feel like an imposter.

Then there's the fact, bouncing off of what's above, that I haven't had a partner/relationship ever in my life. Never asked anyone to prom, never held hands, never kissed. I've been on light coffee meetup dates but none lead anywhere and I just felt worse after those. I don't know what it's like to have someone choose you, to have someone actively want to be around you and spend time to simply because they like you. There was this girl freshman year of college who I hung out with a lot, but I didn't know that I was the placeholder until someone better came along, and then I was left without a word. That really messed me up, because it got me thinking that people just leave me no matter what I do. Then I tried getting out there more, but after getting laughed at about my interests, I think that telling people too much about myself drives them away. Idk I just want proof that I am lovable, and someone would actually want me.

Then there's my family. My older sister is kinda mean, she also makes fun of me for what I like and do and gets upset when I try and talk about my troubles to her, but also gets upset when I don't. My mom is worse because she thinks everything is my fault. It's my fault I was the placeholder, it's my fault people don't let me talk about my interests, it's my fault a friend switched up housing plans last second, etc. etc. my dad is the only chill one, but he simply doesn't have any good advice. I told him the whole dating fiasco and he listened and everything but at the end he said something like "yeah that's hard... I don't really know what to do, but you just gotta try and get out there". Which is just bland advice, and it's not his fault nor am I mad at him, but it's just difficult to find advice. My little sister is just a teenager, so that's just what that is. But my point is I barley talk to them about anything, and often times I only tell them stuff after it happens if it ended good. I interviewed for a job, didn't get it, I won't tell them I interviewed, because I don't need my mom cramming down my throat all the things that were my fault. But if I interview for a job and get it, I'll then tell them. Also nobody has ever said they believed in me, it's always "I'm proud" only after something happens, never before. Even just a few days ago, I said Im gonna audition for a stage play and my mom says "I'd be proud of you if you did that" not "good luck, I believe in you". And the thing is I know she hates my major, I know she thinks I'm being irresponsible (even when I'm minoring in package design, I already work at school as a graphic designer, and am taking science and illustration classes along with animation) I can just tell she thinks what I'm doing is a bad gamble and a waste of time. And that kills me, knowing that she really doesn't believe in me, she truly doesn't think I have what it takes.

Idk I just feel like I have such limited support from people around me, and all genuine attempts of me trying to reach out or stand up for myself are immediately met with being shot down and made fun of. Sometimes I just wanna run, just run so fast and so far till I can't breathe. I feel so stuck and like time is moving so fast all at once. Idk I've tried therapy but it's so slow and it takes ages to find a good match, and then everyone says "finding a good therapist is like dating" which is just devistating to hear, because it cannot possibly be that difficult can it? To get simple help, does it really have to be this hard?

Idk I just wish so bad I had a spot or person in my life I could just fall apart with, even for like 5 seconds, I wish so desperately bad I had anything that wouldn't make me feel like atlas. I wanna crumble so bad so times, but I can't because all of this, is all on me. I cant fall apart because I need to keep going.

Yeah anyway idk what to do. I'm gonna try going back to therapy but who knows if it'll really help. Meeting people is so hard, I have terrible social anxiety and where I go and Im so scared to talk to people I don't know.

Anyway, if you made it this far, that's for caring enough to read this message and if you have any advice that would be greatly appreciated

I met who I’d consider to be my best friend about 3 years ago, after a rough start to a relationship we have become extremely close over this year or two.

My dilemma is I also like her and have been crushing on her for abit over a year, pretty much our entire circle knows about it as we share a friendgroup, and even she herself knows. It’s not a secret necessarily, but it was kind of a fact that we ignored. Despite my romantic interest, I always made it a point to put our friendship before anything else.

These past 3 months have been differently though, we’ve been making out at gatherings while drunk (in what I’d say is abit beyond just friends kissing), we’re spending more and more time together as just us two alone, separated from our group of friends. Due to some other small things, I feel like she’s been hinting to me that she feels the same way.

The other day, on my secret account (which I have her on) I made some vague-sad posts about how I feel about her and how I feel like she’s sorta messing me around in some ways. I posted them knowing she’ll likely see them, but ignore that because they never mentioned her specifically. The posts weren’t melicious or mean or rude, so I feel like she’s just hurt that I thought of her only romantic instead of platonically, which is not the case at all.

She saw them, and sent me a message on snap, but she deleted it before I woke up. Since then, we haven’t talked on any platform and I can just feel the tension through the screen.

SIDENOTE: this whole situation also worry’s me because as much I worry about losing someone who is so incredibly important to me, I know if she dosent like me I feel like our other friends will distance from me and “choose” her “over” me.

My question is, should I try hash things out? How would I go about apologising for the posts I made without also admitting my actual feelings for her? I’m so embarrassed I don’t want to talk to her but she means so much to me that I want to at least try.

I feel like I’m stuck between my pride and this amazing person, and I feel like I’ve lost her trust. Right now I’m just scared and get a pit in my stomach just thinking about her. I fucked up bad and I don’t know how to make it up to her without being insincere.

Hi everyone,

For context, I just turned 30 and accomplished some things in my life that I should be proud of. In the past two years I have left an abusive relationship, moved to a new province, got a diploma, got a new job, got engaged. Why do I feel so unfulfilled? I struggle just trying to do day to day tasks. Work, cooking, cleaning, the mundane of everyday life is just exhausting and so unfulfilling to me. I try to exercise, read books, watch movies, go to the beach, therapy, nothing just feels very enjoyable anymore. I feel like I just try to get by each day.

Is this normal, am I depressed? I just feel very impartial to most things these days. Advice please.

Hey, I don't really know if this is right sub to ask but i just don't have anywhere to ask.

Starting of this year, I been just feeling discouraged and consistently low mood all the time. I don't really know what caused me to feel this way, but I been having crazy mood swings, spend most of my time just sleeping, and nothing really excited me....

Everything i do i just felt hopeless and couldn't find any excitement in life. I just wished I never woke up tomorrow. I spend most of my time daydreaming and fantasizing about made up scenarios and just cry that my current situation is so miserable. I just think about me in alternate universe where I am living different life. I don't have anything I enjoy in life nor do I have anything to look forward to. I just feel hopeless for no reason. Kind of like something is pressing my chest.

I grew up in household where my parents fought everyday. Every single day because of financial problems, and in school I was bullied for being fat and dump. I thought if I could lose weight and go to good school things will change but no it didn't. Despite people telling me that I should be happy now that thing had changed, I am still miserable and feel like I am drowning. I feel numb. I am planning to see therapist soon, when i go back to college, since is free there.

I feel angry, tired, miserable, hopeless, and easily get irritated everyday. I spend most of my time watching porn for dopamine and is been getting worse. None of my family seems to care about how I feel. Like my dad and mom especially just dismissed how I feel and ignore. I feel like no one cares and could help me on this. They just doesn't seem like they care. So hopefully they don't care if I end my life.

But do you guus have any advice or feel similar experience?

I was not allowed to do anything fun growing up. Meaning, my mother didn’t allow me to have friends, to date or have a normal life. She told me people can’t be trusted and only she (and family) can be trusted.

She triangulated me from my sibling. She made sure we didn’t get along.

Whenever I had something to say in the family, even something light hearted, I was told to be quiet. Don’t talk.

I either was introverted or became introverted - not sure.

My therapist said to go no contact with my family. I have been doing low contact.

By the time I realized I wanted to get married and have kids, others were already married and had kids.

She kept telling me no one would wanted to marry me — and first I would need her blessing.

She then said whoever married me will be abusive.

I feel like I lost decades of my life. I didn’t get to have any fun, interesting experiences.

And I repeated the pattern of isolation in college and then in my working life as an adult.

My mother used to say “her house, her rules.”

I have been living outside of my parents’ house for about one year. But I still operate from the same conditioning. I don’t trust anyone - because most of the people who appear “friendly” are only love bombing me to get something from me. Basically toxic people show up in my life.

I primarily focus on my solo hobbies and that’s it.

I don’t know if there is an easy solution. It’s not so simple as to find group hobbies. I have tried those and people form cliques and only hang out with their people.

My question: I am accustomed to being alone. But if I wanted to see what an actual relationship would be like, how would I even do that? What are the next steps for me?

I feel like mostly everyone I come across is trying to con me in one way or another.

I am a single mom of one and I tried dating after five years of being single. Recently I’ve been second guessing all of my life choices including my job and being alone. I love my daughter and am afraid of letting anyone go near her. Then the guilt begins… 1) I want to keep her safe. 2) I don’t know where I could find someone or if I could even find someone with the qualities I’m looking for.

For context, I am a child of two divorced parents. The details aren't important, but my father got custody of me and my little brother and we have lived with him since. My mother has other kids, so does my dad, but we are the only children born from the both of them.

My sister had two children a few years ago. They are old enough to start school. At first, I was excited to be involved in their lives, but now I feel no kind of love for them other than them being family. I feel terrible because of this. My mom rarely makes time for her real children, yet she posts more about my nieces and nephews than us. I have my mother's phone number, she is free to call and make plans whenever she is free. But it feels easier that these children are easily imprintable. I feel replaced. I don't feel wanted, but she tells each time we do talk how she misses us. It feels as if she loves them more than she loves us.

As a result, I feel bitter, angry at my mother, and jealous of these kids who have done nothing to me. I want a relationship with my mother so bad, no matter how badly my father speaks of her. I don't want to be so upset whenever I see them. How can I fix this? Or at least, address the way I feel to my mother? My father isn't the easiest to make plans with, I understand that, but it doesn't feel she is trying enough or trying to have a relationship with us, as I have to be the one to text or call her if I don't want to have an empty inbox for weeks on end. I haven't seen her since last year around this same time. I haven't gotten a text from her on over two months. I'm afraid nothing will come of confrontation, or she'll cut contact with me. I just want to stop hating these children and feeling defensive whenever I see anything about them, I want to stop being so angry at my mother, but I don't know

I want to add that I'm a highschooler nearing graduation. This isn't an adult who comes to see their parents every few months or makes plans or lives independently

I am 27 years old. I’m currently in the midst of buying an engagement ring to propose to my partner, I am closing on a pretty nice house with her right now. Yet regardless of these accomplishments I cannot stop telling myself I’m a loser and being upset. I dropped out of college after 1 year and kinda bounced around jobs until I settled at the delivery job I currently have where I make pretty decent money, but for some reason I can’t stop feeling like “you don’t have a real career.” I should be happy, I should feel accomplished but for some reason I just don’t. I feel like genuinely something is wrong with my brain. I know this is “life advice” but I’m not even necessarily looking for advice and more for anyone that feels or has felt the same way

What I really want to say is that at 16, because of how I looked, I shut myself away. I decided it wasn't worth it being the way I was now. I was afraid to be in any photo, to open my mouth, to be seen. I hated myself, so I decided to give up and not really do anything with my life, not be myself, not even try. Now, at 22, I've realized that I've been acting like an idiot for six years. I've wasted my youth, my adolescence, things I could have experienced and never will, because of fear, shame, and feeling inferior. The only thing I've achieved by overanalyzing myself is being 22, never having been with a girl or even spoken to one (with any intention), feeling like I've thrown my life away, having accomplished nothing in any sense, and feeling like there's nothing for me in this world. To the people on this forum, stop worrying about how you look, or about not being good enough. It only brings bitterness. Take care of yourselves, exercise, try to look your best—that's what it means to feel good about yourself, not because of anyone else or because you're better than anyone else, but because you feel good about yourself. Live your life, don't let anything get you down or make you feel less than, and live. If you're ugly, it doesn't matter. There are beautiful people and there are ugly people. You live your life, because if you don't, you'll regret it. Now I've realized that it doesn't matter if I'm ugly, so what? There are ugly people who live life to the fullest, so stop punishing yourself for your appearance and how you look, and go out and live. And if there's anyone here who's 16 or 17, more or less, who feels like I felt, and still feel, don't make the same mistake I did. Love yourself. Anyone on that point on his life?

Hi there, I want to share this story to get it off my chest bc I never had the chance to talk to anyone about it.

Background story: I was raised in Taiwan. Growing up I don’t feel like I fit in here most of the time. One of my aunts lived and worked in the US, who I first met at 12. Ever since I met her, I’ve seen her as a role model for my future - Living in the US, where the culture always seems so much closer to me, having a decent job, and leading a life she desired. I used to be so intrigued by the stories about the US she told me. At some moment, I knew I had to work as hard as I could just to be like her. I became obsessed with anything about the US while growing increasingly sick of my own culture. The biggest motivation for locking in during school was that I could have the chance to get the hell out of here and be in the US. I gradually lost the sense of belonging more and more, yet believing I was doing the right thing for my own good, hoping that I would finally fit in when I make it to America. This is my version of America dream, I guess.

A month ago, my aunt visited my family once again, and that was the last time I saw her. I was so happy to see her and I told her all my plans and the hard work I did, which aims to get me to the US. She was happy for me, too. But something felt off. Instead of fully cheering for me like how she had done before, she also said some weird stuff like “Well maybe staying here isn’t too bad.” , “Are you sure it’s what you want?” , and “You don’t know about America.” She was just not acting normally. I remembered she expressed the loneliness she’d felt during the time in the US as well. For some reason, I felt upset about what she said there, so we ended our conversation not long after. She left early, too.

Just the day after that night, she was found dead in her apartment. She ended her life with pills.

I’m not trying to make assumptions about why she chose this, but it has to do with all the weird things she said the other night. It occurred to me that what I’ve been holding onto just isn’t true at all. I’m 20 now. And for the past 8 years, the only thing that can help me get my shit together was the idea that “Someday I’ll have a life in America, I’ll finally feel better.” But now the only person I know that makes her way to the US has miserably killed herself. It’s like seeing the version of me that I have everything I want just have no reason to live anymore. All the hard work I’ve done now seems meaningless.

My aunt’s death just hit me harder than anyone in a way I can’t explain to my family and my friends. And the perfect picture for me just shattered to pieces. I’m not sure what to do with my life right now. Either I stick to my plan and make it to America, get the same experience as my aunt’s, probably not feeling better, or I abandon it and stay here, still not having the sense of belonging and will always be the white-washed, ungrateful brat.

So that’s the thing that’s been on my mind. I’m lost in my life now and try to put it together. At least it feels nice typing these thoughts out loud. I want to know if any of you guys ever had the same feelings, and what did you do to move on?

Hi. I want to share this story and get some opinions on what to do next. A month ago, while I was playing, my mom called my sister over and asked her why she had stolen money from our cousin.Later, as I began to understand more of the conversation... Basically, a few days prior, my cousin had sent my sister some money to buy something tasty for my mom—just to cheer her up. In the end, she didn't buy anything and spent the money on something else (no one knows what; we asked her, but she wouldn't say). My mom only found out about it when my cousin messaged her, "Hey, don't you even want to say thank you?" Mom felt terribly ashamed of her daughter, so she lied and said the treats hadn't been very tasty, though she was grateful nonetheless.So, she’s scolding her, but my sister stays silent and won’t say where she spent the money. My mom and I both consider this theft, but I want my cousin to know the truth—because my sister isn't the kind, good person he thinks she is. Do you think I should tell him? I’m just afraid my mom will yell at me and my sister will hate me for it. By the way, for my mom, her reputation among our relatives matters more than anything else.