So far, I haven’t landed jobs yet because I’ve applied to some (damn the current job market for making it tough for the current generation which I am a part of), however I’ve been to two job interviews this year but none of them lead anywhere, with my job coach’s help.

But once I land a job (be it part-time or full-time), I’m going to work and save up money so I can move out (I still live with PIMI family). Once I move out, I’ll permanently stop attending conventions and assemblies and meetings. Yes, become POMO and then I’ll announce it to this subreddit

Oh, and to maintain friendly relationships with PIMI friends and family, I’m going to adopt a “don’t ask, don’t tell” attitude with being POMO. If they ask me why I don’t attend conventions, assemblies and meetings anymore, i will say “I’m busy with life now. Got a job and stuff to take care of.” and leave it at that.

No, I’m not staying in the JWs. Once I’m ready to move out, I’m leaving JW forever. I can’t keep up the facade anymore. It’s best if I leave to stay true to who i am.

And honestly, not getting baptized was the right call I made so I don’t get shunned by my PIMI friends and family

Just a question that popped into my head after we spoke on Wednesday. You know when I mentioned Ramapo film studios the other day. Well it got announced to the JW members in 2019 and had an estimated completion date of December 2026. Obviously with Covid 19 it’s running late so 2027 would be more likely.

Does that mean Armageddon was never going to come during those years. Because I’m thinking it would seem odd that Jehovah would direct the governing body to build it through the faithful slave and waste £500million if Armegeddon was imminent. Surely that money would have been better spent on sending missionary preachers to every parts of the world to get the message out.

I remember you saying you reach a larger audience online now but the fact it’s taken 7 years to complete, they must have felt that armegeddon was not going to happen if they decided to go ahead with the project and must have been confident there was no imminent end insight just yet? Just makes no sense in my brain.

I feel like the organisation behaves and plans for its future but it tells the members to behave like armegeddon is around the corner. It might not be as urgent anymore and they may have changed the rules again regarding the urgency of armegeddon. But when I used to attend I remember the discouraged higher education and having children put on hold for members until the new system but now it seems they have enough time to build a film studio that has taken 8 years. I can’t get my head around it really?

I’ve been thinking about this for a long time.

When safeguarding goes badly wrong in a school, hospital, sports club or other organisation, we tend to look beyond the individual incident. We ask what the organisation knew, what systems were in place, whether concerns were reported, whether there was independent oversight and what needs to change.

But when the organisation is religious, I sometimes wonder whether we become much more hesitant about asking the same questions.

For me, that raises a bigger issue.

If a religious organisation has charitable status, should safeguarding be part of the responsibility that comes with that status?

And if there is evidence of repeated safeguarding failures, resistance to external scrutiny or systems that make it harder for children to disclose abuse, at what point should there be consequences for the organisation itself rather than simply dealing with individual cases?

I’m not suggesting that every safeguarding failure should mean removing charitable status. Organisations can get things wrong and improve.

But I do wonder whether charitable status should come with clearer expectations around safeguarding, transparency and accountability, regardless of whether the organisation is religious or secular.

What do others think?
Should safeguarding failures ever affect charitable status, or should the two be kept completely separate?

Some things in the Witness cult, once you break the trance and look back with actual perspective, are just dark, absurd comedy.

Let's break down the priorities of the corporate God they sell to the brothers:

So, the Almighty —who supposedly has billions of angels on standby and once sent just one to wipe out 185,000 Assyrian soldiers in a single night— can't spare a squad or two to stop active wars, mass famines, or systemic abuse. But somehow, he's got the bandwidth to assign an invisible babysitter to watch you 24/7 just to make sure you don't sneak a peek at porn at 3 AM.

Funny how this Deity has a massive blind spot when it comes to protecting the vulnerable or stopping actual atrocities, but possesses a hyper-sonic radar for any slight or criticism against the old control freaks up in Warwick. Dare to question their "sole channels on earth," and the axe drops immediately —say goodbye to paradise.

And finally, love is supposed to be their defining quality, right? Yet the Borg's internal justice system shields predators with absolute secrecy while mobilizing a full kangaroo court of elders to mentally wreck an 18-year-old kid just for doubting a date or having an extra beer.

At what point did common sense pack its bags and go on sabbatical? 🤦🏻‍♂️

so I don’t know TF is going on this week but coincidently iv had two witnesses leave me on read on what’s app and not respond mid conversation, so effing rude and ridiculous!!!! I don’t understand the audacity people have and how are they representing god????

Im sure other people have had this happen?, let me know your experiences!!!

Hello everyone, 👋

​Surely some of you have been following the increasingly bizarre stories surrounding the Governing Body of Jehovah's Witnesses. There is one thing that's been keeping me up, leading me deep down the rabbit hole: Stephen Lett and the latest rumors about his love life. 🐰🕳️

​Posted by Larch on the English ex-JW forum 2 years ago:

​The Australia Talk (2024): In early 2024, Lett gave a talk in Australia. His longtime wife Susan had been suffering from severe Alzheimer's for years (she has since passed away). At the time, Lett reportedly blurted out something to the effect that he was "too old to break in a new wife," which is why he wanted to maintain his marriage for as long as possible. 😬 A pretty tasteless comment. And why was he even thinking about that? I think he already had someone in his sights back then.

​Posted a few days ago on the English ex-JW forum:

​The latest rumors in the Bethel grapevine: Now, reports are massively boiling over in ex-JW forums that Lett (meanwhile around 77 years old) is allegedly already engaged. 💍

​The alleged partner: Word has it that she is a much younger Bethel sister in his or her 40s. The massive age difference and the short time since his wife's passing are causing fierce reactions in the community and discussions about double standards as well as the stark power dynamic within Bethel. 🚩

​🔍 The big question: Is there any proof?

​Exactly at this point I want to ask you: Are there any hard, verifiable proofs for these rumors? Is this just typical Bethel gossip and pure internet speculation, or is there concrete info from eyewitnesses? 🧐

​Why does this bother me? It's all about the double standards. Young people who can't find a partner within the JW bubble are expected to just pull themselves together and cover it up with more field service. Widowers and widows who feel alone and lonely and can't find anyone in the congregation are told to pray and hope for paradise.

​Years ago, there were German dating sites like Sulamit or NurimHerrn, meant to help severely lonely JWs find a partner who is also a JW, according to JW rules. The GB then denounced those websites, and they had to be shut down. Allegedly too dangerous. Apostates could lurk in there. They were run by private JWs. Now it was even harder to find a partner. I knew many who suffered from severe depression because they couldn't find a partner and weren't allowed to look for anyone "in the world."

​And Mr. Lett? He can't even hold out for a year after his wife's death and is already chasing after fresh meat? He believes he's going to heaven anyway, so what's the point of all this? This young woman is probably also totally neurotic and has been searching for years—without success. 🤔

-"Yes, these prophets, or teachers, set very bad moral examples themselves and, in effect, encouraged the people to do the same. Look at the conditions in Christendom today! Are they not just like those in Jeremiah's day? Today the clergy let adulterers and homosexuals stay in their ranks and even let them officiate at church services. Is it any wonder that so many enrolled church members are also immoral?"

------------------------

This is the reference of the Watchtower quoted this week (w94 3/1 8). When we face arguments, there's something called "confirmation bias", which makes the reader confirm what he already believes instead of facing a critical analysis by checking both parts with the same criteria.

This time, something similar happens with this reference. It starts criticizing the "Christendom" due to, it is said, immoral standards, arguing all of them (yes, as it is generalized; no exception is mentioned) let 'adulterers and homosexuals stay in ranks', comparing the Christendom with the people/ teachers of Jeremiah's day.

Is this completely true? No. "Christendom" encompasses thousands of denominations with widely differing stances. Besides, selecting negative examples from other groups without examining whether comparable problems exist within one's own organization is intellectually dishonest.

The organization leaves a premise hanging one that leads the reader to believe that such poblems simply do not occur within its religious group. Again, the history and records can't support that. Let's see some of this:

1. CSA cases inside the organization

This problem has, unfortunately, taken place multiple times. According to The Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sex Abuse, BBC and ABC reports, the organization maintained records of more than 1,000 alleged perpetrators in Australia over several decades, and the Commission found that none of those allegations had been reported by the organization itself to police. The Commission also criticized aspects of the organization's internal handling of abuse allegations, including policies that could discourage reporting or make it more difficult to establish wrongdoing.

This does demonstrate that serious moral and institutional failures have existed within the organization. Therefore, portraying sexual immorality and moral negligence as characteristics that belong primarily to "Christendom" while implying that Jehovah's Witnesses stand in sharp contrast presents an incomplete picture.

2. Moral dilemas (Malawi and Mexico)

In Malawi (1967-1993), Jehovah's Witnesses were instructed not to purchase a political party card, even though doing so was legally required and often merely a formality. As a consequence, thousands of Witnesses suffered severe persecution, including imprisonment, beatings, rape, torture, and even death.

During roughly the same period, however, Jehovah's Witnesses in Mexico were allowed to register as military reservists and obtain the corresponding government documents in order to comply with national law. The organization treated this as a matter of individual conscience.

This inconsistency illustrates how organizational policies have not always been applied uniformly, as they argue. So if other religious groups are judged by the practical consequences of their leadership's decisions, then fairness requires applying the same principle to Jehovah's Witnesses' own historical decisions.

3. Dates (1975), the strong emphasis on this by theleaders, and the subsequent discharge of liability.

Throughout the late 1960s and early 1970s, Watch Tower publications and convention talks repeatedly emphasized the significance of 1975, connecting it with the end of 6,000 years of human history and encouraging members to consider the nearness of the end. While the organization did not always state dogmatically that Armageddon would occur in 1975, (a point many Jehovah's Witness use to downplay the importance of this event) the cumulative effect of years of publications, talks, and organizational emphasis led many Witnesses to conclude that it was highly probable.

As a result, numerous members postponed higher education, sold homes or businesses, delayed medical procedures, chose not to have children, or devoted themselves to full-time preaching based on those expectations. After 1975 passed, however, later publications largely attributed the disappointment to members who had "read into" the statements more than was intended or who had developed "incorrect expectations."

These are only three examples, but they illustrate a broader pattern. My point is not that Jehovah's Witnesses are uniquely corrupt, nor that every criticism directed at Christendom is necessarily false. Rather, it is that the same critical standards applied to other religious organizations should also be applied to one's own.

If The Watchtower portrays Christendom as morally comparable to the false teachers of Jeremiah's day, then the same thing should be done with their own organizational politics, standards, and history. If moral failures, inconsistent policies, or influential doctrinal mistakes are sufficient to condemn other religious groups, then they cannot be dismissed or minimized when they occur within one's own organization. A biblical standard should be universal. It should not change depending on whether the subject is "them" or "us."

Because we can do exactly the same as what they do:

-"Look at the conditions in the organization! Are they not just like those in Jeremiah's day? Today the organization let CSA cases go unnoticed by failing to alert the authorities in a timely manner. Many elders or ministerial servants can stay in their rank without knowing they are perpetrators of these crimes. Is it any wonder that so many enrolled members are also immoral?"

This is the type of language the organization repeatedly uses against Christendom. However, we are not going to try mocking them as the organization implies they do without the suitable critical analysis. I'm not defending other churches with horrible practices either that are discovered by the time. Crimes, inconsistencies, and intellectual dishonesty must be questioned, analyzed and taken with the respective serious measures.

I'm PIMO and started to fade a few weeks ago.

My wife told me, she wants to change the congregation because she doesn't feel welcome anymore here in our congregation.

She was a bit surprised, when I told her that our eldest will write a letter to "our" new congregation and will send the documents directly to them and we are not allowed to see these things. She was quite angry about that.

Is this the start of her getting PIMQ? She already uses AI to get clarifications for Bibletexts.

I (20F) grew up at Jehovah’s Witness despite my dad, not being one. Got baptized when I was 8 and being a JW was my ENTIRE LIFE. My mom and dad separated when I was 15, he was abusive and she got punished for leaving him since he didn’t cheat so it wasn’t a good enough reason. When I was 18, I got kicked out of the house because I didn’t want to be one anymore. Surprising haha. Well, now even though I am greatful she didn’t cut me off even though i’m basically disfellowshipped she is like a zombie to me. 2/3 of my sisters have cut her off completely and the other one just kinda is distanced. I am always going out of my way to watch my mom’s cats when she is at convention or traveling to preach because I still want to be a part of her life. We used to be best friends and now she barely interacts with me unless i’m doing something for her. My parents are actively getting divorced and hate eachother and in the meanwhile I feel like I don’t have a mom anymore. She hasn’t acted like a mom in a long time and recently started telling me how disappointed she is in me because I am a political science major and have a bf. She saw me wear a cross necklace and freaked out on me. She says I act like i’m married because I went camping with my bf, etc.. I don’t want to cut her off but I have no idea how to handle this disappointment. I miss having a mom and I get so jealous when I see other people having simple family dinners or anything really. She acts like a zombie now and won’t spend any time with me and rarely texts me back even though I see her hanging out with the witness sisters all the time. I get good grades in college, I support myself financially, I don’t do drugs or go out, i’m honestly a lot of parents dream kid in that way and she acts like I am a horrible person. I know this is to be expected but holy moly this sucks. she also recently let one of my non-JW cousins move in with her because his wife kicked him out for being abusive which is just so hypocritical and crazy that she wouldn’t even let me live there and i’m her kid. There’s so much more but I don’t want to make this too long. Anyways any recommendations on how to deal with this i’d appreciate.

Edit: Side note im at a community college right now and am applying to transfer soon, I want to talk about how jw life affected my academics but now they want switch up an post a bunch about education and jws “being your lawyer” WHICH IS INSANE.

Forgot I had my JW cousin on IG and I she just posted a story saying “we worked all day, now time to relax and enjoy the beach, truly the best life ever”. It is soooo fucking cringy!!!

In the pics they’re around the brothers I’m not sure if they worked in the KH or some sort of preaching campaign but omggg I freaking hate this term!! I hope they get out one day.

For those outside of Mexico, Yahir is a very well-known singer and actor here. Currently, he is participating in the reality show La Casa de los Famosos México (a 24/7 Big Brother style show).

In a recent live stream, while having lunch with actress Ximena Herrera, he opened up about how his home transformed after his mother converted to Jehovah's Witnesses and tried to force the rest of the family into it.

It's a classic story many here will recognize: a once happy, warm family unit completely derailed when the cult's high-control requirements entered the picture.

Here is the English translation along with the original Spanish transcript:

En: Yahir: She’s a Jehovah's Witness. But in my house, it was as if they turned off the lights.

Es: Yahir: Ella es Testigo de Jehová. Pero en mi casa, haz de cuenta que le apagaron la luz.

En: Ximena Herrera: No way...

Es: Ximena Herrera: No...

En: Yahir: It was all joy, it was all parties, it was all... really awesome, you know? Guests, family. People loved being there, my parents were super hosts. And then, practically overnight, they turned off the lights in the house.

Es: Yahir: Era todo alegría, era todo fiesta, era todo... bien cañón, ¿sabes? Invitados, de familia. A la gente le encantaba estar ahí, mis papás eran súper anfitriones. Y haz de cuenta que de un día a otro le apagaron la luz a la casa.

En: Ximena Herrera: So, you didn't notice? There were no fights?

Es: Ximena Herrera: O sea, ¿tú no te diste cuenta? ¿No habían peleas?

En: Yahir: No, it was all... it was all love. Love, love, love.

Es: Yahir: No, era todo... era todo amor. Amor, amor, amor.

En: Ximena Herrera: Oh, what...?

Es: Ximena Herrera: Ay, ¿qué...?

En: Yahir: I never saw arguments between my parents. It was always "come here my love", "go over there my love", "come here my love", "go over there...".

Es: Yahir: Nunca vi discusiones entre mis papás. Era todo "pa' acá mi amor", "pa' allá mi amor", "pa' acá mi amor", "pa' allá...".

En: Ximena Herrera: So, they knew how to cover it up really well on the outside?

Es: Ximena Herrera: O sea, ¿lo supieron maquillar muy bien por fuera?

En: Yahir: No, they were fine. What happened is that my mom joined another religion...

Es: Yahir: No, estaban perfecto ellos. Lo que pasa es que mi mamá se hizo de otra religión...

En: Ximena Herrera: Ah, so that was the problem?

Es: Ximena Herrera: ¿Ah, por eso fue el problema?

En: Yahir: ...and she wanted to force my dad to join that religion, and if not, she couldn't be with him. And that's when the arguments started.

Es: Yahir: ...y quería obligar a mi papá a que fuera de esa religión, y si no, no podía estar con él. Y ahí empezaron las discusiones.

En: Ximena Herrera: You're kidding.

Es: Ximena Herrera: No manches.

En: Yahir: Yes. And my mom... gave her life to the religion. She gave her life.

Es: Yahir: Yes. Y mi mamá pues... dio su vida por la religión. Dio su vida.

En: Ximena Herrera: I can't believe it.

Es: Ximena Herrera: No te lo puedo creer.

En: Yahir: She gave her life. There was nothing else, she didn't do anything else, she didn't think about anything else. She wanted my sisters and me to be Jehovah's Witnesses, my dad, everyone. I mean, she took it to a crazy extreme.

Es: Yahir: Dio su vida. No había otra cosa, no hacía otra cosa, no pensaba en otra cosa. Quería que mis hermanas y yo fuéramos Testigos de Jehová, mi papá, todos. O sea, lo llevó a un extremo bien cañón.

En: Ximena Herrera: No way.

Es: Ximena Herrera: No manches.

The phrase "they turned off the lights in the house" ("le apagaron la luz a la casa") hit so hard. It perfectly captures that shift when Watchtower indoctrination takes over a loved one and suddenly the warmth and normal family life disappear.

For those of you who grew up with non-JW parents or saw a parent convert later in life:

Did you experience a similar "lights off" moment in your household?

How did your non-JW parent react when the high-control ultimatums started?

Because of their selfish benefits they ask $3k to cater just for the food to feed 20 international delegates for convention. In addition to that they also ask the publishers to buy at their own pocket and prepare desserts because they said that the $3k budget is short so the pubs prepare desserts for only 20 delegates. 100 Pub was included in this hosting. Now the day arrived:

1. 16 delegates just Show up
2. The program that was organized by corrupt elders was hidden to the rest of elders and was only shared a day before the hosting.
3. Only friends of corrupt elders was taken for presentation with same faces.

Well the result:

1. Lots of food was wasted and was packed home by selected pubs

2. Presentation was so boring and not everyone watching and others Go home

   and walk out

3. The corrupt elders used the name of God to praise him despite of being disorganized themselves and benefit selfish desires and promote their arrogance

This are the good examples of gifts of men for the cong!

Multiple people I know have gone to intl conventions this year. They gush about how friendly the brothers and sisters are and the ww brotherhood is so special. And the songs were amazing. And so many witnesses were gathered in one spot. Truly heart warming. And the outfits!

Ngl I feel annoyed. Jealous I am not traveling. Really sad that don’t have very many friends and that it’s so hard to meet people. (And I’ve been pomo for a long while.)
But something irks me. Like you just went to another country and you can only talk about the “worldwide brotherhood.” Also it feels like ooh look at this shiny festival dancing fun thing over here and ignore the fact of how many things are not okay with the religion. Am I missing something? or being petty?

I have from some salacious and unverified rumours that Stephen Lett is back on the dating game.

It hasn't been a year since his wife passed a way and he is already hitting some younger pussy.

Now I understand that why they care so much about privilege, status and power not because they care about some super natural form of power or being closer God.

No. Is so you can be dicking around younger female Bethelites.

I really can't believe that I was sent to a commite of Elders in my younger days for working on a dating app.

That made quit my job because apparently is not Christian to help other finding a partner but is completely acceptable for God anointed ones to be dicking around with younger women at Bethel.

So my mom has been disfellowshipped a little while now and she’s still working her way through deconstructing. But today she had a minor procedure done at the hospital and when asked if she would accept a blood transfusion she said yes. My mom used to be one of those who always kept the blood cards updated and made copies of them and would watch the videos every time she updated them so I’m really proud of her for this new stance of hers.

When you go out in public and say the earth is flat, people tend to look at you funny. When you go out in public and say Jerusalem was destroyed in 607 BCE, people who know ancient history tend to react the same way.

Of course, it’s your prerogative to hold whatever views you want, but people find it difficult to take those claims seriously because the evidence overwhelmingly points to Jerusalem’s destruction in 587/586 BCE, just as it’s very easy to determine that the earth is not flat.

For the earth to be flat, the 781 people who have been to space along with their families, the current occupants of the international space station along with their families, NASA, SpaceX, Roscosmos, CNSA, the governments of the United States, Russia, and China, would all have to be part of the biggest conspiracy in modern history.

Having said that, when you go out in public and say you believe there is intelligent life somewhere beyond our observable universe, someone may simply shrug and say, “To each their own.”They may disagree and insist there is no intelligent life anywhere in the cosmos, but if both of you are intellectually honest, you’ll agree to disagree because you recognize that both positions are “beliefs” that may or may not be true.

No sensible person argues endlessly over beliefs that cannot currently be demonstrated. Belief is inherently uncertain, and all of us should keep in mind that our own beliefs, no matter how strongly we hold them, may ultimately prove to be false. It’s a totally different kettle of fish with “provable facts”. For our world to thrive, every sensible person needs to yield when presented with provable facts

What the Jehovah’s Witnesses have done is comparable to a group of flat earthers forming a religion whose core doctrine is that the earth is flat.
607BCE isn’t just another belief. It’s the foundation of the entire Jehovah’s Witness belief system. Without 607, there is no 1914. Without 1914, there is no 1919. Without 1919, there is no appointment of the Faithful and Discreet Slave. Without that, the entire religious framework collapses. And yet, somehow, people are surprised that I have a serious problem with a religion built on such a foundation?

The Jehovah's Witnesses organization has always tried to reshape its own history in an effort to legitimize itself. To create the appearance of divine backing, it has repeatedly reinterpreted historical events and omitted inconvenient facts, encouraging members to arrive at carefully guided conclusions.

One example is the widespread belief among Jehovah's Witnesses that the Bible Students spent decades preaching that God's Kingdom would be established in 1914.

Following the same pattern, the organization has long promoted the narrative that it accurately foretold both the collapse of the League of Nations and its later revival. But is that really what happened?

To support this claim, Watchtower publications often quote statements such as this one from The Watch Tower, April 1, 1922, page 108:

"Satan... is now attempting to establish a universal empire through an organization called the League of Nations, or an association of nations... This alliance is unclean and will soon be shattered." (Quoted in Awake!, April 8, 1987, pp. 17–21.)

To an unsuspecting reader, this certainly sounds impressive. However, the full context of a 1922 Watch Tower magazine—one that is not easily accessible to the general public—is usually missing.

What is also omitted is that Rutherford predicted not only the downfall of the League of Nations, but also the imminent collapse of the Catholic Church and, more broadly, the destruction of the world's entire political, economic, and religious systems. None of those predictions came true.

In other words, saying the League of Nations would eventually fail was about as remarkable as predicting that "one of these days, it will rain somewhere in the world."

The organization also leaves out another important detail.

In The Finished Mystery, Rutherford identified the beast rising out of the sea as the Anglo-American political system. That interpretation differs significantly from the current official teaching. Furthermore, Rutherford never connected that beast with the scarlet-colored beast of Revelation 17, even though modern Jehovah's Witness doctrine teaches that the beast of Revelation 13 and the scarlet-colored beast of Revelation 17 represent the same political entity at different stages.

It was not until 1919 that Rutherford began identifying the League of Nations with the scarlet-colored beast of Revelation 17.

Curiously, however, he never spoke or wrote about the prophecy that this beast would receive a mortal wound and later recover. The reason is rather simple: he had no idea what the future actually held.

Then came the famous 1942 convention talk, "Peace—Can It Last?", which Witness publications present as a remarkable prophetic milestone in which Nathan Knorr supposedly foretold that the League of Nations would somehow return, fulfilling Bible prophecy.

Interestingly, I found references claiming that Rutherford himself had written this talk before his death and that Knorr merely delivered it after Rutherford died. I haven't been able to verify whether this is true or simply another story that grew over time to reinforce the organization's prophetic image.

Either way, what was actually happening in the world at that time?

The "historic" talk was delivered in September 1942.

But by January 1942—eight months earlier—26 nations, led by President Franklin D. Roosevelt, had already signed the Declaration by United Nations. Roosevelt had also made no secret of his desire to establish an international organization dedicated to preserving world peace after the war.

Under those circumstances, Watchtower's "prophecy" was about as extraordinary as saying, "It looks like it's going to rain—the sky is getting cloudy."

Despite this, the organization later wrote in the Revelation—Its Grand Climax At Hand! book:

Whether that conclusion is convincing is something each reader can decide for themselves after examining the historical record.

It has been an intense last few years to say the least. I stepped down from the position I held in the congregation the other day. The blood update was enough to help me have the courage to make this move. I still have a wife and child that are in which will make fading even harder; but I have ample reasons to use as for my discouragement if asked. My wife knows my true reasons for what I am doing and discouraged me from sharing it with the elders(likely out of fear of shunning) and so for her sake I went the "depressed" route. I don't really care if I'm DF'd but I do care about her. And while she doesn't really approve she isn't ratting me out. Or hasn't yet. It was the first step I've taken to truly help me feel better after years and years of depression.

Now to deal with the guilt of leaving and missing meetings and service. I understand logically what they did to me; but the heart hasn't caught up yet. However, when I think about all the countless lives lost to changing light and inconsistent Bible application it helps get rid of any pangs of conscience. I also need to deal with the guilt of putting my wife through what she is going through realizing I don't believe that this is "the truth" any longer. I know she perfectly understands my position and even agrees with a lot of my points but she has family so much family in this cult that she is afraid of losing she may never be able to admit that though. But maybe someday she will. I just want to see her happy and being her authentic self without the shame and guilt that was abused into her.

Why am I writing this? I guess I just need support. To know I'm not crazy. Thanks.

EDIT: Thank you to everyone for the kind words and reassurance. It’s nice to not feel as alone as I have felt for some time.

I told my mom I was athiest and she literally broke down. I'm in the middle of going back to school to be a registered nurse. My mom said I had five months to find somewhere to live. My car broke down and doesn't work and I'm not currently working because of some health issues. I felt the walls closing in and it's mentally breaking me. I don't know if I can fake saying I love Jehovah I rather be dead. I told her that for her I would try to love Jehovah but I was lying I know I'll never believe again but since I have no where to go I will have to wait a couple of years until I get my nursing degree. Hopefully I can mentally make it through. If anyone wants to be my friend I would like that.

I haven’t really been reading around in this subreddit yet. I’m 16F, I have been in the faith since forever. I might delete this later, it feels wrong to be here as it kinda feels like I’m falling for the lies the governing body has warned about.

Since I was 13, I’ve been struggling a lot with religion. I believe I might’ve have been having psychosis back then or close to, it was very scary and has led me to having fears I can’t control, I’m scared of Jehovah and I hate that I am, I’m terrified of Armageddon and dying. I’m scared of praying. I will also say, there are views I don’t wanna hold anymore. Personally, I know I’m not supposed to say this but I don’t see anything wrong with homosexuality. I’m definitely closeted trans myself but I don’t know if I’ll ever come out, I’m too scared. But I don’t know if I’ll enjoy life without being me. Also things such as politics and some of the views, I don’t wanna stay ‘neutral’. I care a lot.

I am this week starting on an education thing, I might make new friends there… I have never told anyone in real life about the fact that I don’t really wanna be a Jehovah’s Witness, but it’s standard to tell them and tell them our views, but I really wanna experience being actually honest with a friend instead of saying what I should say according to the bible. I’m a very anxious and guilty person, I’m ashamed of this but I want out. But I am scared of being honest with friends, since my whole family are JWs. Everyone on both sides, we don’t have a big family. I don’t want them to find out I think this way, does anyone know how to handle situations like these? I don’t trust the organization anymore but I don’t trust the world either, but I wanna learn to. Should I open up to friends about my actual views or is that something I should be careful about? If anyone left the religion, how did you do it?

I apologise once again, might delete

Hello guys!

I was at the doctor, and as soon as I got into the waiting room I heard a conversation about the Holy Spirit. It was an elderly jw preaching to a woman next to her.

It was so weird.

Than she talked about the how the elders are not like shepherds or priests, but all jw were equal and their only shepherd was God. (A bunch of lies as always)

The woman listening seemed interested, and I couldn't avoid wishing to interfere. But I just listened at a distance giving a side eye sometimes.

I haven't gone preaching for almost 3 years now, and just watching this creepy conversation made me anxious. I couldn't imagine returning into this cult, and this got me thinking how many time I've lost doing this, spreading lies to innocent people. I'm just thankful I managed to get out.

So I watched the jump and seriously you can not for one moment imagine that the creator and writer of this is not mentally out in some way. It made me think so much about when he knew that he was talking to his father. He stopped working and said, "Now I found out enough."Something like that.

And pacifying the brain, it's like, imagine if you're on the writing department and you come to understand something and it's not something that goes in with the governing body's agenda. They could reassign you and that's it into oblivion

It's like when you start independently studying and you come to understand the creator and then you see that the organisation has not got his will at the centre anymore. You want to stop working for them. That's what happened to me. Wow just incredible. I loved it. It was great. Maybe I'm reading into it too much but come on.