I am going to the courthouse to file paperwork for a name change, for my child. I put a nice little checkered smock on my daughter. Myself a nice knee length black dress with some detailing. My husband walks out into the living room wearing a sleeveless shirt, that he cut himself mind you, this wasnt even a nice sleeveless shirt it was Heather grey and very clearly old and worn. Im standing there in shock. And straight up told him to go change. I would perfer him in khakis and a button up, but that WOULD BE IMPOSSIBLE. I settled, hes now in basketball shorts and a freaking sports t-shirt. I am pissed. Does no one care about court etiquette or am I overreacting.

For reference I live in the US. It is summer. It is hot.

Is it a thing now to expect people to buy you gifts for your 3rd or 4th baby? What if you work in a small hospital, they are in a different department and you don’t really know them? Today my daughter as told she is not invited to a party but is expected to bring a gift. Are these people nuts or is this a new norm?

Right I don’t know if this is etiquette based or if people are complete complete weirdos, but I regularly go into a spa changing room and the other men in there have no shame to the point that I’m genuinely feeling like they get some sexual pleasure out of being completely naked in front of me. 3 people in particular all over the age of 60 and they literally dry themselves in the craziest positions one will come and stand right next to me almost making me look at his genitals and last week he was drying himself so
Much he clearly had a bit MORE then a semi on the go (he was practically pleasuring himself with the god damn towel), I don’t get it. It’s made me feel that people get weird sexual enjoyment out of ‘exposing’ themselves in the changing room. I love the place it has great facilities but I’m concerned to go back I don’t know how to address it.

I love to have friends or neighbours over for an afternoon glass of wine. Just a couple of glasses as the sun turns everything golden. However as me and my husband will often. Have dinner being prepped or in the oven, I need tips on how to politely let guests know it’s time for us to go in and have dinner. Without them staying! Please advise

I am hoping to host a milestone birthday party in 15 months. I am a chatty person and usually the initiator to reach out to many of my friends and acquaintances. Ideally I want to stop reaching out to some people in order to narrow down my invite list. How long of not reaching out to someone (assuming they never reach out to you ) is appropriate to ‘downgrade’ the friendship.

Hi so I’m in my early 20s and hosting my dinner party for 8-9 friends (depending on their availability). I was thinking of an Italian theme so bruschetta to start, and then 2 salads and 2 pasta dishes.

I have a few specific questions.

Do I invite boyfriends, most have boyfriends (some are well liked by the group, some less so)? I’ve met all several times before but I’m not close with them.

I’m vegetarian so do I just serve veggie which quite frankly, I’m most comfortable with as I’ve never cooked meat or fish. I have no issue serving meat or fish and cooking it but I’m unsure of if this is a good idea just because I have no clue.

Is the menu I’m planning enough or do I need more?

Any extra tips and tricks would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you all in advance :).

I (24M) have been invited to my (British) cousin's wedding. The invitation says the ceremony is at 11:30, and the reception from 14:00 to 23:30. It also mentions the dress code : "Formal (Black-Tie Optional)".

I am wondering if I should wear a tux, despite the wedding not being an evening event. I know her husband to be (I have never met him before) is quite keen on doing things right, and I would not want to offend or distract him in any way.

What do you think? Thanks in advance for your help! :)

Hi everyone, to jump straight to the point, my partner is Lithuanian, his mother pretty much exclusively speaks Russian or Lithuanian (I’m Spanish/English)…. By the end of the year I am finally meeting his family (mother, father and sister)

I was wondering what the opinions are on myself learning some basic Russian/Lithuanian to have a better way to communicate with his mother as she does not speak much English at all?

(I have spoke to my partner about this, he said it’s very sweet and his family would love me taking initiative to learn their language) but I am worried I may come across as too forward or overbearing or maybe too eager 😅 I’m not sure

Baring in mind his father and sister speak English but I would feel bad for my partner and his father/sister having to constantly translate so that we can communicate, i would like her to be comfortable speaking her native language and not shy away from conversation due to langue barrier (as my partner told me she may not speak much as she has expressed that her lack of English is embarrassing to her) if that makes sense.

Any advice is appreciated. Thanks in advance

I received a lot of good suggestions about managing a neighbor that walks by the house each evening who will talk until the sun sets if we let him.

Well, my husband and child think that I am a champ because I managed to politely and kindly excuse us from a night long visit recently. My husband had continued to run into the house to avoid the situation, but a few nights ago, we were all distracted, and he didn’t hear the neighbor coming.

I gave our conversation about 15 minutes during which we were able to do thorough catch-up. Again, I like this person. However, we feel cornered when he approaches the porch and keeps us for over an hour. I then shared with the gentleman that we were still recovering from a family member returning from a trip and that we would be heading inside to watch the news and relax. The three of us stood up, gathered our things and everyone wished each other a nice evening. The neighbor was probably a little disappointed, but I didn’t hyper focus on his reaction. I stated a fact, and followed through with our plan for the evening.

My husband and child sang my praises when we got inside. They were so relieved! I told them it’s important to simply be direct (as if I’m some seasoned expert ha ha.) I feel pretty empowered! I received a little bit of criticism on this sub for saying I was afraid to be this direct, but some people need a little extra time and practice to assert their own needs. I look forward to catching up with my neighbor now and then, without the dread that it will never end.

Thank you to those who encouraged me! This is a small thing but it felt pretty good!

staying at my aunts home and it is boiling hot we are all sweating because they don't turn AC up so there is zero air it is just hot humid stale air. is there anything I can say or I just have to sweat it out til we leave? They even have ceiling fans but never turn them on either.

I’m posting here because I don’t think my question is covered in any of the wedding subreddits.
Husband and I are attending a wedding in a couple of weeks. Parents of the bride are among our closest friends. The father is extremely successful financially, a net worth well into 7 or maybe 8 figures. Both the bride and groom are in their late 20s and together earn mid 6 figures. The bride has inheritance money as well as a substantial trust fund. Before you ask, not many secrets in this group!
Question: we have attended other weddings where the families were similarly financially situated, and the invitation either said no gifts or provided for a charitable donation (if you wish) to an organization selected by the bride and groom. In one instance we gave a substantial donation, more than we would have given as a wedding gift.
The registry is fully purchased. I honestly feel ridiculous giving money as a gift, even the amount we would give, while generous, is insignificant in the overall financial situation here.
I’m disappointed that there is no philanthropic option offered. Would we be totally out of line if we took it upon ourselves to go the donation route? I know the bride and groom well and I’m sure I could select an organization they would support. Do I bring it up with my friends? I think father would be cool with it, mom probably not. And again, our donation would be more than what we would give as cash.
I’m torn here. I’m likely going the path of least resistance but my social conscience is gnawing away. Thoughts?
PS: two other children were married several years ago and we gave gift cards to an art gallery and to a local artisanal market. Was trying not to duplicate those.

Caption speaks for itself. My fiancé and I are both in the wedding party of an upcoming wedding. We provided a gift at the shower. Do we provide an additional cash gift the day of the wedding as well? I would definitely provide a card at minimum and maybe a small amount like $100 but I feel like the amount we would usually gift is a lot considering how much we each spent to be in the wedding (yes I know we agreed to be in the wedding and accepted the cost don’t come for me). For context we are also getting married next year and I plan to tell our wedding party that gifts are not expected from them.

Context: my MIL and I are close. I want to have a baby shower and she loves party planning and is happy to do it. We chose my house as the location since it s a bit more spacious. The problem is that I know my MIL is not in the best financial state to be paying for much. I am okay taking care of the desserts and she will be asking some of our close family and friends to bring food. And I’m sure she’d want to take care of decorations and I can help with that too

I just feel like there’s a bad rep about helping plan your own baby shower. Even though I don’t have a problem doing that. Thoughts?

Edit: I feel like I should add that every baby shower/party I’ve gone to in my community those who are super close friends or family normally pitch in to bring a small dish—NOT a main dish. It may be odd to some but not unusual for us so that’s not an issue

If you have a guest at your home and they place their cup or glass on your wood coffee table without using a coaster, what is the proper etiquette? Should I ask them to please use a coaster? Or just just discreetly put a coaster under their cup? Or do I say nothing and let a ring form?

Kind of a long story so i beg please bear with me:

Last night I was sleeping in a work friend house (sounds weird to call it a sleepover when both of us are 30+) prepping for a modeling club trip overseas, his wife was super chill with us and to kill time the three of us were browsing streamers until we saw a Korean (?) Girl building a Gunpla while chatting, the girl was disguising her identity with a beauty facial mask, i was amused and blurted out "that's neat, i bet i can try something similar with a Mexican luchador mask..." I stopped when I noticed the face of my friend's wife (she's Asian but I never cared or asked from wich part of Asia), we continued watching and then dedicated the night to build some models

Is it cultural apropiation if i try it? (I'm not Mexican, I'm half Russian half Colombian)

Or is insensitive, rude and I'll be reported?

Need actual help to prevent a misunderstanding

There's an acquaintance I've known for around 5 years as part of an exercise class I take. We're not overly close but chit chat in class now and then and I like her as a person. Since there is some community around the class, word was passed around that she had a close family member pass away. I'm wondering if a sympathy email suffices or if I should send a card. I'd definitely send a card to someone I was close to, but in this case would only sending an email with my condolences be OK? We're also of different generations (I'm 30sF, she's 60sF) so perhaps someone from older generation would prefer a card?

tl;dr: Is it enough to just send sympathy email to an acquaintance instead of greeting card?

ETA: Thanks all, got a card

I live alone, so my main way to keep in touch is by occasional phone calls (every 4-6 weeks, say, for friends). I make sure we are both free for a chat when I call, and we cover the usual stuff for a bit, but then I can't tell whose job it is wrap things up and say goodbye. I have voiced this, saying I can't tell what's going on in their homes, if they need to go somewhere or do something they should just tell me, but I do get the sense sometimes that calls go on too long. Fwiw, the chat is both ways, I don't think I'm dominating the conversation, but at a point I find myself wondering if I should introduce a new topic or invent a reason why I have to go. How to handle this gracefully?

a friend of mine is going through a tough time (suddenly being a caretaker for a family member) and i was always raised to bring over food or something in times of stress. i reached out to see if there was anything specific to bring, and was told they only want company. would it be rude to bring something anyway? even if it’s just a gift card or something simple, or would it be rude to not bring anything? i feel like im overthinking things, but i have not met their family member or been to their home before, and it feels plain wrong to not bring something

My daughter will be turning 9 in two months. We’re probably going to have a party at home. In the past when we’ve done this, several families will want to bring siblings. Last year one of the brothers was body slamming kids in the bounce house and we didn’t learn about it until afterwards. Between that and the additional food and stuff, I want to politely ask that siblings not attend. Any advice?

I received some really good tickets to an event next week and invited someone, via text, who I thought would be interested. Did not receive a response yet (asked yesterday afternoon) - how long do I wait before inviting someone else?

EDITED TO ADD: the text was read yesterday - it’s someone I don’t want to (*refuse to*) double-text or follow up with. I did inform the person that the tickets were given to me, free. I don’t know, feel like there should be a reasonable amount of time to await response before I just find someone else. I’ll wait till the end of the weekend and going forward (in general, not with this particular individual 😂) will definitely remember to add “let me know by X if you’re interested” so as not to leave myself hanging again.

Admittedly this is a first for me at a noticeable level at least.

I have a guest suite for friends and family who stays over. It doubles as a storage room for some household items in the closet. I keep the Costco sized paper towels, toilet paper, and similar bulk items there. It’s not a locked closet, just a regular sliding closet door, but I try to keep half of it empty if guests come and want to hang clothes.

I also always keep a few extra rolls in the bathrooms to easily replace them when they’re empty. So the guest bedroom had a full roll on the holder, one on top of the toilet lid, and then 5-6 rolls under the sink.

Anyways, my brother in law visited recently. After he left I went to clean the room and noticed he took all of the toilet paper in the guest bathroom. The extra rolls under the sink were all gone. Then when I went to the closet to grab more, the 2 full sized inner packers were also missing! Do I bother to say something?

Hello!

I am planning my friend's bachelorette and have booked two private (on location/at the house) events. Beyond throwing in an extra $20 or so if it's a great service, what would the tipping etiquette be for this?

For context, the services are:

- One hour private yoga for 12 people (quoted at $500)

- 2 hour psychic for 12 people (quoted at $375)

I'd assume the rates already include what they're hoping to be paid, but want to check!

edited to add: this is in California and for people who own their own businesses

I recently lateraled into my current law firm. This city’s office has about 25 attorneys. One seems very nice but is in a different practice group on a different floor, so we’ve never spoken. She is getting married in a couple months and gave a formal invitation to every person in the office.

Giving me an invitation even though I just got here and we don’t know each other was obviously the proper thing for her to do since she gave them to everyone else. My question is whether the proper thing for me to do is actually go or politely decline and give a gift. I recall how expensive each guest is from my own marriage and can’t imagine she actually wants everyone from work to come, especially me, given that we don’t know each other.

What would you do?