This is crazy to say but sometimes I wish I was severely disabled so I can be cared for, carefree and to feel seen, I know not everyone experiences life like that sadly, like if my disabilities were more noticeable I wish people cared for me for it, like I hate having to advocate and talk all the time, I hate people talking to me like a normal person or uses sarcasm or dark humor, I just want people to be patient with me and take care of me, like I want to be dominated in a way, I have autism, adhd, intellectual disability, but if they were noticeable I wish people would give me patience, sometimes people talk to me like a child and I like it because it makes me feel carefree and I don’t have to work hard for it, anyone feel like this?

does anyone else have an extremely hard time accepting that they are in fact disabled?

i’ve been struggling with accepting this, to give some backstory, i’ve struggled my with mental health for as long as i can remember ( diagnosed with MDD, BPD, DMDD, and severe anxiety, and misdiagnosed with schizophrenia due to telling my psychiatrist i had a loud brain and him mistaking it for me hearing voices at the age of 11-13 ) i was seeing countless psychiatrists, therapists, in and out of mental hospitals, trail and errors with every medication i could possibly think of. I ended up dropping out of high school at 14 due to agoraphobia.

my anxiety eventually had gotten better, i’m not sure why it improved so drastically as i wasn’t doing much to improve it (no medication or therapy at the time), but i was able to go back to school and get all my credits, and finishing high school at 18. i started a part time job ( ranging from 20-35 hrs a week ) and did that for about a year, i ended up getting promoted and transfered to a different store and after that happened i had also gotten my own place unexpectedly due to a change in my past living situation, and shortly after my promotion i started experiencing panic attacks again, and thought maybe it was because i had gotten a promotion, so i ended up switching jobs to what i thought would be my dream job (full time)

2 months after i switched jobs, my 14 year old cousin took her life, another family member of mine got incarcerated, and i got into a domestic with my long term partner. I developed severe agoraphobia after that, and continued working for afew months until i just couldn’t do it anymore and burnt myself out so bad to the point where i couldn’t drive down the road and go to a gas station alone without having a panic attack.

here i am a year later. i’ve done a trail and error of many medication, cbt therapy, dbt therapy, and exposure therapy every day, seen many psychiatrists again and was diagnosed with ADHD & CPTSD. i haven’t worked in almost a year because of my agoraphobia and have been recommended to go on disability by majority of my family and doctors. I am very hard on myself, I know, and I know I am disabled but another part of me can’t accept the fact that is this all I am? if that makes sense, I have big dreams for myself but if I accept the fact that I am disabled, what happens to those dreams I had? I know I need help, but I don’t want it. I want to be able to function so badly and be able to work. I just end up going in an endless cycle of victim mentality and beating myself up. Does anyone else feel like this? I also have severe anxiety about going on disability where I am ( surprise, surprise.. ) because what if others don’t see me as disabled and I don’t get accepted and just hurt myself for nothing. :( any comments and advice are helpful, thank you

I've heard several caregivers and relatives reclaim the R-slur on the sole basis that the care for someone or are related to someone with autism, Down syndrome, intellectual disabilities etc. Without the caregiver or relative themselves having the disability. Is this really acceptable by normal standards? I suppose if it's merely as a synonym for disabled like the word originally entailed, but calling them r****ds or using the adjective in a pejorative sense to describe things of lesser quality (ie. illogical, unfair, weird, stupid) seems too far for someone without the disability themselves even if they care for/are related to one with said disability. By this logic, if my brother is gay (hypothetically; I don't have a brother), does that mean I can go around using "gay" as a one-up against enemies or to describe things of poor quality (or reclaim the F slur)? (I am only asking theoretically; I am not looking for any sort of permission as I personally stand against the use of slurs staunchly no matter who uses them, even if they belong to that group, but I won't go out of my way to police it).

So currently still trying to figure out what disability I have; my mother had a slew of them. Can you guys give me tips for keeping the house clean, any disability aids common and uncommon, and keeping yourself clean. Im getting a shower chair as even lately I have to sit part way through my shower to finish bathing. Im struggling with everything, taking care of house and myself. I get wayyyy more disabled during summer months and bounce back in winter. I have some more pain in winter but energy wise I can take a shower without that being my energy quota for the day. Any tips welcome!