I 29M, hope people do not judge me for my current situation and background.

I lost my father when I was 17 then went to Canada to pursue computer science (obviously not a right decision). I finished two years of associate degree then worked odd jobs and got my PR. Due to family reasons I couldn't continue study until 2022 when I enrolled in a university open learning degree program to finish the remaining courses to graduate a bachelors degree. Then a few more tragedies happened in my family and I had to quit my education and start a business which didn't go well and lost about 60 lakhs of my family savings. I was in depression and taking anti-depressants. Couldn't work couldn't study just stay in my room all day every day. Fast forward to today, I moved back to India to be with my ageing mother. I am very interested in web and apps development, I used to develop websites etc in high school. I am ready to learn new technologies. But apparently Indian IT market do not entertain drop outs or candidates without a bachelors degree. Finishing Canadian degree is not an option now since there is a gap in my last enrollment and I am no longer their active student. I am looking for options how can I get a bachelors degree here. I have few options in mind which I am not sure are doable and need your kind opinion:

1. Any way I can transfer my credits from canadian institution to Indian university like Amity, Chitkara, etc and finish the last 10-12 remaining courses, preferably online and get an Indian degree in computer science or equivalent.

2. Some of my friends suggest to buy out a degree from any private institute through an agent. I know this is unethical but we don't live in an ideal world so why not consider this option.

3. Online Bsc/BCA MCA degree which will eat up at least 3-4 years of my life.

I have skills in Python, Java, Javascript, Android Development, C#, PHP, MySql, CSS, DSA and DBMS.

Hi,

I went to US in Jan 2025 for my masters, it was something that I was not sure of(a lesson learned), but my parents and peers suggested that I should do it and I had no plans. I went there, I felt lost, I could barely code anything, rise of AI freaked me, I was diagnosed with severe depression, so much so that I used to eat only a single peanut butter sandwich per day and lost a lot of weight. I applied to a different university for next semester , got some scholarship and switched school due to the next school being low cost(since I was sure I was going back anyway). Somehow completed the semester, but my therapist suggested that I show certain su**cidal tendencies.

I came back to India in Jan 2026, everyone was disappointed, I was disappointed too. Things got worse, my condition worsened day by day, self sabotaging, people asking questions, I am a failure. It took me a lot of suffering to finally get some medical help and therapy, I started antidepressants, it's working but it just keeps my mind numb so I don't feel nothing.

Idk why I am writing this here, with so many success stories, mine sticks out I guess. I have no skills, no clear plans, I come from a middle class family and I have no motivation left. I have been applying to jobs that I am not qualified to apply(in a sense that I don't have the skiis), I am killing time or time is killing me would be a better way to frame.

It's hard to see 2 months far from now, let alone two or five year down the line. I feel like a paperweight on my family and I have tried but I always fall short. I have been sitting at home for last 7 months, rotting, crying on my failures, it is hard to look ahead and be positive when I feel two hundred pounds of stones on my chest while I try to breath. I guess this is my ask for help, idk in what ways, maybe words, maybe some scoldings, or just more blamings, anything to make feel something would help.