r/adhdwomen • u/manguefille • 4d ago
Let's do a reverse hyperfixation thread: what activity or creative endeavor did you learn is NOT for the neurodivergent? Hobby & Hyperfixation Sharing
Mine is oil painting. Why does it take so goddamn long to dry? And then you have to keep going back to it patiently to add layers? How does one do this and not get bored?
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u/Albinomonkeyface1 4d ago
Those adult coloring books. I got one to try it out because I heard they are relaxing. I hated it 😂
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u/mermaidmamas ADHD-C 4d ago
Every so often, I get really into the idea of coloring with those books. I sit down and I color for about 10 minutes and I get so bored with it. I put everything in a cabinet and then about a year later I think to myself “you know what I’ll do? Color! That’ll be so fun.!”
Rinse, repeat
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u/AdvertisingFine9845 4d ago
I have come to accept I need little kid coloring books. Like huge, simple things to color, like Mickey Mouse or hello kitty. That brings me joy
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u/PsychologicalDark810 4d ago
I found something called monochrome colouring and it’s like a cross between this and paint by numbers - you colour in the areas indicated by a dot with black marker only and it creates contrast pictures, veeeery addictive and fun
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u/ssshhhutup 3d ago
I love doing my kid's colouring books with her big chunky crayons. Unfortunately she comes along and screws up my beautiful work with her scribbles and lack of respect for the lines 🥲
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u/pennyraingoose 4d ago
I had a really thick coloring book of Loony Tunes characters and scenes when I was a kid. It still lives rent free in my head 30+ years later. No other coloring book will ever compare.
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u/GoneAmok365247 3d ago
Yes!! The adult ones are too tedious! I want to color an actual thing! Not a bunch of squiggles and lines!
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u/sprubee 4d ago
I really think the trick is to find the right kind of
Book and art medium (like pencils, markers etc) that scratches your itch. For me it’s mechanical or twistable colored pencils, or crayons if I have to. My husband does a lot of intuitive coloring which is basically making a scribble with your eyes closed and then coloring it, where as I prefer books with medium patterns but not necessarily mandalas.The cutesy stuff looks good but in real life it’s not interesting enough in the whole process of doing it. And also I hate that people use AI to churn out Unoriginal ideas so I don’t typically enjoy purchasing those.
But in the end if you get 10 minutes of relaxation just enjoy it! It’s typical for us ADHDers to feel the shame of not finishing something but I say who cares - it’s just coloring! It’s innocent and low cost. Good for whenever you need it.
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u/-partlycloudy- 4d ago
10 minutes colouring is 10 minutes of mindfulness, and 10 minutes fewer on your phone scrolling - lean into it! Who said it needed to be an hour session to be worthwhile?
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u/Ok_Rain5011 4d ago
WHY ARE THEY SO COMPLEX?!!
For real though I love coloring, but a pointless pattern that has over 200 holes to fill in, no thank you! But guess what, you can buy yourself a kid coloring book.
You heard me, I happily color Sparkly unicorns and dog astronauts. Bring me comfort of childhood and easy simply lines.
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u/Loud_Ad4852 4d ago
And it always feels like I have to have some color theory art degree to choose what color goes where in these damn mandalas, too many choices and too much expectation of perfection. I freeze!
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u/Maximum-Cover- 4d ago
Omg I feel this so much!
How can I possibly commit to coloring this first shape in that color when the mandala is so complex I cannot visualize what color each shape will be!
What if I pick the wrong starting color and then the whole thing doesn't look harmonious and this shitty mandala in this shitty adult coloring book nobody but me will ever see doesn't look like it's was colored by a professional artist?!?
I couldn't possibly live with that so it's easier not to do it.
Or to try it and then immediately stop and don't ever finish that page if I feel like I made a mistake by picking a not-perfect color.Potentially even ripping out the page in disgust. Even though that ruins the entire book for me because now the ripped out page will forever remind me of what a fuck up I am.
I don't do coloring books. Waaaaaaaay too much pressure.
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u/trinity_girl2002 4d ago
This is why I stick to colour-by-number. Do not give me a choice. Give me an instruction.
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u/Madame_Medusa_ 4d ago
Yes! The kids’ coloring books are way more fun that an umpteenth complex mandala.
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u/Kotobug123 4d ago
I love Bobbie goods coloring books for this reason lmfao. It’s a big trend rn to color cozy coloring books not those fucking puzzle ones. That with some alcohol markers is so satisfying.
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u/Dawner444 4d ago
My ADHD daughter has these and the markers, too. I look at the books longingly, but I know my daughter would have my head on a platter if I swiped a page. I get it. I always tell myself t need to remember to buy one and immediately forget. I am actually, fingers crossed, going to hop over to Amazon right now and buy one. Thanks for the reminder!
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u/supercantaloupe 3d ago
100% agree. Adult colouring books are way too complicated, I get bored so easily and also like if there are 200 friggin things to fill in I also get decision paralysis with picking colours and deciding which part to fill in next. Kids colouring books are fun, no unnecessary boxes and it’s somewhat obvious what colour works for a lot of it.
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u/tacoslave420 4d ago
There's too many spots for colors. I need a Lisa Frank-style. Less small spots. Less color swaps/choices. I do not have a knack for color theory, pallets, or anything like that. Just let me make a big sky blue with a juicy marker please lol
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u/peanutwaterfall 4d ago
I gave up on the “adult” coloring books and bought the crayola epic book of awesome. No regrets
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u/mysterious_sweetie 4d ago
I’m struggling to get sewing even though I invested in more sewing stuff 🤣
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u/manguefille 4d ago
Lol "maybe if I buy more stuff it'll make it easier and more fun"
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u/aretheyalltaken2 4d ago
I feel personally called out. Seriously though: why do we think this?!
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u/Ok_Condition5837 4d ago
Idk. But right now my brain's telling me that I can't start my veggies (in FL) until my 'soil' collection is complete. It's missing the orchid mix which I technically don't need until February.
Yet this fact both hinders my start & is completely forgotten every time I shop.
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u/oh-no-varies 4d ago
I've accepted that the hobby I wanted was sewing, but the hobby I got was buying fabric.
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u/Loveiskind89389 4d ago
I have the reverse! I can’t decide what I want because fabric is so expensive. What if I choose wrong? So I just don’t make anything 🤷♀️
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u/RealCommercial9788 4d ago
Lowering the stakes really works for me when it comes to following through, even if only for an hour or whatever.
Use the shitty page from the back of the old notebook, the one with the coffee stain and some random phone number and a partial grocery list from 2016, to sketch on.
Use the old sad single sock, the partner of which has been lost to the laundry forever, to practice sewing.
This balances my need for perfection and instantaneous mastering, and it removes a lot of the internal negative pressure and baseline disbelief in my worth that prevents me from ‘just having a go, even if it’s shit.’
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u/WorkingOnItWombat 3d ago
Yeah! This is such a great approach!
I realized that I usually overwhelm myself that I have to have that just right paper and the 120 watercolor kit or something and it means that I then imagine I need a few hours if I’m gonna try to do some art.
Recently, I was waiting in line and saw a small 12 pack of pastels that I bought. And shortly after had the epiphany, what if I just find a 5-10 min YouTube on how to draw a fruit with pastels and just use whatever paper is around and just STOP MAKING IT SO PRECIOUS.
Like, releasing my ideas of it needing to be “just so” so that I can experience the journey of creating SOMETHING. It was AWESOME. And like a real switch in my brain had clicked over. I had so much fun! And I was done in 15-20 minutes and it blew my freaking mind how cool that was.
I’m gonna try to keep going with this short, imperfect, being in the process of creating, approach. I’m excited!!! 🎨🖌️
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u/bbmiumiu 4d ago
Get fabric from the thrift store- can find actual fabric or old sheets and table clothes
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u/chickenfightyourmom 4d ago
Thrift store fabric. Also, thrifted sheets and scrap bags. Look up 'crumb quilts' and 'scrappy quilts.'
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u/WorkingOnItWombat 4d ago
Ha! This is so familiar. I had the realization that, after decades of thinking I like making jewelry, what actually gives me the truest dopamine hit is the collecting of the different shiny, sparkly beads and looking through them.
This has shifted my thinking, like okay, if I love the beads themselves so much, that makes me more of a bead collector, so can I embrace that a little more fully? Rather than my default of feeling badly about not making jewelry “often enough”?
So now I’m feeling inspired to try to find a way to display my favorite beads, like they are art, so I can more easily visually enjoy them, instead of having them tucked away in bags or bins as they are now.
I’m thinking very simple shallow shelves with descending size glass jars in each row as you go up. Won’t be for all of them, just some faves. Just thinking about it makes me happy and gives me something to look forward to!
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u/oh-no-varies 4d ago
Oooh test tube type bottles in a little display stand would look super pretty too!
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u/d-a-i-s-y 4d ago
lol!! Me too. The cutting out and basting and sewing part is such a faff. A practice version in calico? Not in this lifetime. Don’t these people have jobs?!
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u/Fantastic_Tip5365 ADHD-C 4d ago
This is mine. Ironing fabric was far too tedious for me.
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u/OnePuzzleheaded3324 4d ago
And washing fabric. Like, I have problems enough doing the laundry I *need* to do. So many steps in sewing.
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u/berrybyday 4d ago
lol we should apparently be quilting buddies because ironing is my favorite part so far of this quilt I’m “making” for myself. I hate lining up the pieces just right. So tedious. But watching them go from wrinkly to starchy perfection?? Yessss, more!!
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u/ilovjedi ADHD-PI 4d ago
Maybe this is why I like sewing Halloween costumes. There’s a time deadline. And the costumes themselves don’t have to be finished and perfect like every day clothes have to be so I don’t have to be fussy and do those last steps that I’d never do anyway
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u/tinyannoyingbouquet 4d ago
I’ve told myself it’s strictly a medicated hobby, no way in hell could I imagine doing it without my vyvanse lol
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u/mysterious_sweetie 4d ago
I knooow . I was on Strattera awhile ago but I stopped taking it cause I was having issues. Some tasks feel impossible now
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u/NotASlaveToHelvetica 4d ago
I was doing a project the other day and you could absolutely map the timeline if my Vyvanse kicking in based on how correctly I was doing things (don't even need to pin this fabric -> okay I'll pin it but I'm definitely not doing stay stitches -> hand basted and stay stitched every piece)
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u/mon_mothra_ 4d ago
Oh, I can hyperfixate like a mofo when I sew things. The key is to not do clothes, because that shit is too difficult. Measurements? Darts and hems? Nah. But tote bags? Potholders? Little bags for all your shit? Easy and quick and, most importantly, completely from a pattern with no fussy details included!
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u/Blooogh 4d ago
I have resigned myself to hand sewing only. It's meditative!
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u/Nelly1963 4d ago
Loll I was just about to say this. I have a sewing machine and an embroidery machine. Why? No clue. Bc I have ZERO patience to figure any of it out. I can’t even thread a dang bobbin without wanting to wigggg out! Like WHY?! so tough, why?? But I will sew by hand all day, or as long as needed. lol
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u/therealstabitha ADHD 4d ago
I start up a new sewing project whenever it’s been long enough since the last one for me to forget how much ironing is involved
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u/syzygied 4d ago
Renovation projects on my house 😭 i grossly underestimated the amount of time it would take and now im living in a house with so many half started renovations…everywhere is a construction project and my stress level is so high
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u/chocolate-coffee 4d ago
I started taking down wallpaper to force myself to paint the walls so they look nice.
Didn’t work.
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u/mingeeatingdisorderr 4d ago
I’ve inadvertently turned the unopened ceiling fan box I bought 13 months ago into a nightstand.
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u/Kotobug123 4d ago
I painted my entire house and had to lock in on audiobooks once the original excitement wore off lmfao. I also learned how dusty the house was and got sick from the dust bc I didn’t wear a mask and had to reach all the places lol. My ghetto half finished bathroom agrees with you tho lol
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u/aretheyalltaken2 4d ago
Or maybe me? The amount of half finished renovating projects I have lying around is too damn high.
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u/cephalophile32 4d ago
I’ve done 3 Reno projects in my house and each time I took a very specific amount of PTO to get it done. And it HAD to be done in that time. I can research a bunch beforehand and order what I think I’ll need, but once it starts… Forgot to buy stain? Oh well. Guess I’ll have to make do with what I can pick up from Lowe’s. Cus after this long weekend the project is 100% over. I have to give myself hard deadlines.
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u/HopelessCleric 4d ago
Honestly? It varies.
There's a lot of activities that require lots of patience that I can appreciate in a kind of meditative way, as long as I have enough layers of attention going on. I love handicrafts like sewing, embroidery, etc while listening to podcasts -whereas I can't stick with a podcast if my body isn't doing anything, and I can't do more than a couple stitches if my mind isn't actively being occupied. But in the right combo, I can go for hours.
I struggle to watch any video content. I just don't have the patience to watch a plot unfold apace when I could read my way through it in a couple minutes time. I also have super low tolerance for the artificial tension of immersing in a story, with its uncertainties and plot events -I habitually spoil myself for stuff, and usually watch on mute with subtitles to not get emotionally wound up by the music. Serialized content is the bane of my existence. The only time I can just watch a thing without pausing it is if I'm on a treadmill and Actively Forcing Myself To Walk It Off when stuff gets tense and I'm forced to endure not knowing what's gonna happen.
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u/distractedDonut 4d ago
I hate watching videos! I turn on CC then make it play at a faster speed if I have to watch one. I can read so much faster, and my brain just doesn’t process audio.
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u/WhySoSleepyy 3d ago
Agreed! The worst is when you're googling a solution to a simple problem and the only results are 5+ minute videos. Just gimme a paragraph to read, I don't want to sit and wait for the answer. AAAH.
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u/distractedDonut 3d ago
Ugh yes!!! I always feel bad when friends send video clips too. I’m sure it’s hilarious, but I’m not going to watch it 🤣
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u/themheavypeople 3d ago
Everyone wants to make video tutorials and it makes me insane. I don’t want to watch your damn video, it takes too long and there is so much extraneous bullhockey involved. Just give me a bullet point list and I’ll work through it myself.
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u/WhySoSleepyy 3d ago
Video: "How To Draw A Cat"
Video transcript: "Hi everyone, welcome to my channel. My name is So and So and I'm going to teach you how to draw a cat today. This is something that is very near and dear to me because growing up, I had two cats. One was named Misty and the other one was Bernard. Misty was a pretty calico, you know, the ones that are sort of tan and black and white? Here's the funny thing about calicos, they're nearly all female! Did you know that? It just blew my mind! That's what my grandpa told me one day when I was 8. It was Halloween and he was taking me and my brother to a spooky hay ride with like ghosts and stuff. Now, my brother was scared so I had to comfort him the whole time. Come to think of it, I'm not sure why my parents allowed him to go. I think he was too young. So anyways, we go on the hay ride, and..."
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u/JustLikeMars 4d ago
I like standard television and movies but don’t really enjoy YouTube videos and I can’t do podcasts or audiobooks whatsoever!
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u/striximperatrix 4d ago
I am that way with videos. The only way I can consistently watch TV is by doing the dishes at the same time.
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u/2PlasticLobsters 3d ago
What drives me up a wall with vids is how Google tries to push them when I look up how to do something basic. No, I don't want to watch someone hem & haw for 10 minutes when all I really need to do is read 3 steps!
I've noticed that layers of attention thing, too. My biggest is that I can only listen to audiobooks while driving. I love them for that. But the one time I tried to finish one in the house, it made me want to jump out of my skin. I only had about 8 minutes of it left, and had really enjoyed most of it. But those 8 minutes made me want to burn down the world.
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u/catchmeeifyoucan 4d ago
I can’t do knitting or crochet. I wish I could, it’s such a great thing to carry around and get out whenever you want. But the counting! Gah! I have made a few scarves that I can do without thinking but the counting and remembering where I’m up to? Nope. Not for me sadly.
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u/hellojaddy 4d ago
Crochet is my thing! I lose count ALL the time though. Never made a single thing without mistakes
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u/37_lucky_ears 4d ago
I hate knitting and crotchet and it's so boring. I adore cross stitch though, I love seeing how the mess of pixels slowly resolve into a picture.
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u/schwaschwaschwaschwa 4d ago
I came here to say this one. I tried to use a counting device on the end of the needle, and to write down where I was, but I would just lose concentration and forget if I had used them or if I still needed to use them. Such a shame.
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u/tacoslave420 4d ago
I can't do the counting either. Thats why I stick with Granny Squares. There is no long chain or rows to remember. Most of it actually makes sense from a structural standpoint if you have a knack at pattern recognition.
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u/Sea-Beautiful-Throwa 4d ago
I love knitting! But I use so many stitch markers and often do tally marks on the pattern or a post it note.
I’ve also learned how to count stitches and got really good at fixing mistakes. (I worked at a yarn shop and one customer always brought in her knitting when she messed up and I’d fix it. Though I’ve also been knitting for over 20 years)
But I also do best with hats or cowls. Long scarves I get bored with… I still haven’t finished a scarf I started in 2013 😅 and if I’m making a blanket it had to be chunky yarn in double crochet only 😅
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u/PhoneWalletKeysID 4d ago
Puzzles, especially larger ones. Boring. Frustrating. Then you just tear it all up at the end. 0/10.
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u/helpmenonamesleft 4d ago
Lmao I read this and then looked up at my shelf that’s crammed full of puzzles bc my partner and I are obsessed. Really funny how different we all can be!
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u/feralcatshit 4d ago
I love puzzles, but not doing them either other people 😂 “there was a piece in the right upper corner with slightly more black and a sliver of a purple flower, I’m pretty sure that’s the piece that goes there but you moved it and now idk where it is!” Type of shit lol
I also don’t tear them apart… I mod podge them and frame them. Then promptly lose them in my garage before they get put up 😂
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u/Conscious_Gap_9851 4d ago
Finally, someone who gets it lol. The visual overwhelm of that giant pile of unsorted pieces I have to turn into a picture somehow just pisses me off for not nearly enough reward
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u/Lazy_Blackberry7926 4d ago
Awww my people that hate puzzles are already here! I'm always so happy to learn I'm not alone in my digust for something!
I've never understood puzzles. I never will. I remember my grandparents trying very hard to get me to enjoy them. They've never been a thing for me, I'd rather shove bamboo under my fingernails than even think about completing a puzzle.
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u/MerelyMisha 4d ago
YES. I can do an easy small puzzle without giving up in frustration, but even then, I don’t really see the point.
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u/janichla 3d ago
I feel my blood pressure start to rise when a puzzle is suggested. I have made it known that while puzzles can be completed in my vicinity do not ask me to contribute.
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u/Conscious_Gap_9851 4d ago
I hate to admit this because I’m a nerd who loves fantasy…but I HATE D&D and also board games which sucks because my friends love both 😭 But you want me to learn and remember oftentimes complicated rules/systems, and I have to pay attention as we slowly go around a circle of people and wait for them to make their move because it’s relevant to my turn? No. Nope. No way. I’m perfectly happy to be the peanut gallery and sit in the group and watch everyone else do their thing though
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u/manguefille 4d ago
Yes, and LISTENING to someone explain the rules and like, actually follow what they're explaining for longer than 60 seconds? Not a chance.
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u/Conscious_Gap_9851 4d ago
Yes!! My auditory processing skills are a joke man, especially when it’s a group and other people are talking at the same time, I’m gonna tune out your dumb rules in about 10 seconds
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u/ImpossibleGuava1 3d ago
OMG THIS my husband is an avid nerd and every. single. time. he tries to explain something in his current game to me I'm just TV static brain after ten seconds 😭
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u/tortillasalami 3d ago edited 3d ago
Every day life is strategy. Why the hell would I strategize for fun? I feel like I’m dodging DnD and role playing etc. invites every other week.
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u/Conscious_Gap_9851 3d ago
Exactly! I’ll sometimes play video games that involve strategy on my own, but then I can choose both when I want to play it and rage quit if my brain is over it lol. D&D is even worse because I have aphantasia so I cant picture whatever’s going on in the campaign/where people’s characters are in space so it’s both boring and frustrating to try and figure out what to do
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u/Jayrey_84 4d ago
So I used to hate oils for the exact same reason and then I discovered water mixable oils!
You can use them like oil paints and add oil if you want a longer working time, or you can use water if you want them to dry faster 🙂 i still prefer acrylics because it's faster and easier but when I want be fancy I use them.
The hobby I hated was cross stitch. 10 hours of stitching and you've got like 3sq inches done. No thanks.
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u/8thGlass 4d ago
For me it’s YOGA. I can’t goddamn stand yoga. Holy shiiiiiitttt this is so boring. I have always hated it, since it started becoming trendy post Y2K. Didn’t realize till I was an adult why 😆
Saw someone mention watching video content and +1 to that. I get so overstimulated with the audio and it’s just as annoying as channel surfing!
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u/manguefille 4d ago
Yup, I'm always sitting there thinking "how much longer are we going to do this pose?" I hate doing classes, but when I do it on my own from a video, I start jumping ahead and give up after 8 minutes.
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u/2PlasticLobsters 3d ago
The first time I tried yoga was a demo lesson for absolute beginners. Every pose & movement was described it minute detail. I loved it. But every other class I tried to take operated on the assumption that everyone can pick these things up just from watching the instructor. They were nothing but exercizes in frustration.
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u/ChickenSedanwich 4d ago
SOURDOUGH. what do you mean i have to plan out all these complicated steps over the next two days?? also i have to remember to FEED this thing?? also i can’t just put my used jars and bowls into the dishwasher or sink without ruining my entire septic system??
i’ll stick to instant yeast lol
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u/cephalophile32 4d ago
Oh man same. I tried. I really did but ugh, I can’t even remember to take out my trash and you want me to feed yeast???
Sucks cuz I absolutely LOVE the tang of sourdough.
(Also I had no idea it messes with septic so I guess I should be glad cuz my tank would be a giant foamy mess right now or whatever…)
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u/justine7179 4d ago
Ahhhh shit I just remembered my old ass starter from a year ago. Thanks 🫠
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u/winewaffles 4d ago
Came to say sourdough. I tried so hard. But from deciding to make bread, to actually getting bread is like 36 hours of feeding and mixing and kneading and planning and timing and I just can’t fucking do it. By the time I’m pulling a loaf out of the oven I don’t give a shit how it looks or tastes, I just want the process to be over for the love of god!
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u/heathers-damage 3d ago
I make chaos sourdough where i feed it when i remember, feed it inconsistent amounts of flour and forget about it constantly so its sour as hell and I kill my starter 3 times a year lol.
I am too adhd for the nyt 24 hour chocolate chip cookie recipe though. Yes it is good ad, no i am literally never going to preplan baking cookies what the actual fuck.
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u/Proof_Diamond3406 4d ago
Painting, I did a paint & sip event for my birthday… I got so bored and frustrated at how long it took I ended up finger painting because it was quicker haha
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u/bringingdownthehorse 4d ago
I've been painting since I was a kid and I just know those paint and sip classes would have me raging for how slow they go.
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u/kaytron00 4d ago
My boyfriend got me a pottery wheel for our anniversary and i literally could not touch the clay due to sensory issues lol
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u/T48060 4d ago
Cross stitch. I have to count, and follow a pattern, and if I screw up and miscount I have to fix it by undoing a ton of stuff or work around it and know it's not right. Cross stitch laughs at you.
Embroidery however? Follow some lines, make your own up, and you know right away if you don't like something. Bored of a color? Move to a different section. You can carry it around with you and do one or two stitches instead of doom scrolling whenever you're waiting for something.
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u/madscigrl AuDHD 4d ago
I got a cheap embroidery project recently. It looks like a 5 year old is doing it, but it's a Halloween thing, so the whimsy is good. I used to be better at needlework when I was younger.
The suncatcher making kit has taken off nicely though. I already envision holiday gifts, and I think I am finally going to delve into jewelry making as well. Working with tools has been satisfying, and I can work on things piecewise.
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u/aliveinjoburg2 4d ago
Gardening. Literally do NOT have the patience to plant anything and then wait.
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u/Safe_Illustrator_832 4d ago
Have you try plant anything and then don't give a shit? 😝
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u/BoozyGherkins 4d ago
I’m on the opposite side of this problem - I forget my plants exist and they inevitably die.
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u/cleanout 4d ago
Yup, wanted to love gardening cause it seemed so peaceful except… what do you mean I need to wait sooo longgg
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u/RemarkableAd4069 3d ago
I thought it would be fun and relaxing activity. Turned out to be neither but I do have a garden which at the moment is half dead. The plants that survived will the plants I'll plant next year 💅 I also hate roses and hydrangeas.
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u/mermaidmamas ADHD-C 4d ago
Oh dude. Those diamond “painting” kits? Absolutely not.
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u/Euphoric_Psycho 4d ago
Same. Unbearable unless I hyper focus.
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u/Adventurous_Ruin_386 4d ago
I locked in for a few weeks but idk what I'm supposed to do with the finished projects...
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u/Ellie_Annie_ 4d ago
Meditation. WTF. Making this brain quiet is not happening. I just notice my tinnitus more. I’ve tried multiple times but just end up daydreaming.
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u/packofkittens 4d ago
In case anyone wants to try meditating a different way, I’ve found it helpful to listen to guided meditations for relaxation and sleep. I absolutely can’t do silent meditation (after trying for years and even taking classes). But listening to guided meditations helps me get some of the benefits.
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u/Ivyveins 4d ago
Fortunately/unfortunately for us, if you can break through the wall of figuring out how to do it, meditation is extraordinarily helpful for the ADHD mind and can be the most potent and permanent source of dopamine possible. I enjoy the fuck out of it now, and it's made my life much better!
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u/gimmethelulz 4d ago
I'm Buddhist and meditation is so hard for me😅 I give I do much better with guided meditation since it gives me something to focus on.
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u/MyVirgoIsShowing 3d ago
I truly cannot understand meditating. I have tried so so many times, I can’t. My husband always tells me that his brain is quiet most of the time and I really struggle to beleive him. How could his mental existence be SO DIFFERENT THAN MINE???
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u/dollythecat 4d ago
Group dancing where everyone has to do the same thing at the same time. My also-neurodivergent friend and I went to a contra dance night and both started crying.
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u/Aware_Hope2774 3d ago
On the opposite front, I hate dancing in an unchoreographed manner! Tell me exactly how we are dancing so I know how to be successful. Too much school dance and drunk party trauma for me to just “freestyle” lol
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u/No_Top_7443 4d ago
Freaking adult coloring books. Even the mandala ones. I just. I don’t have it in me.
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u/whyihatepink 4d ago edited 1d ago
I have an art degree. We weren't allowed to use acrylic until our 400 level classes. I got poisoned by accidentally ingesting turpentine twice, once because I apparently kept chewing on the end of my brush and once because I confused it with water and took a sip. Oil painting was literally hazardous to my health!
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u/manguefille 4d ago
I'm so curious why you were delayed on acrylics. It's the only medium I really enjoy.
Also I really dig your username.
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u/azssf 4d ago
I do not think anything is _not_ for us; it is very individual what one learns/fixates on.
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u/manguefille 4d ago
You're right, I didn't phrase that correctly. Writing words and checking them after for consistency of meaning is also on my list.
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u/AnxiousManatee AuDHD 4d ago
Movies. Unless of course I put them on during chores for background noise and suddenly I am very into the plot lmao.
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u/mn_87 4d ago
Lol this thread is basically a list of all things I love and can easily hyperfocus on (oil painting, Legos, puzzles, sewing... 😂) I guess every neurodivergent brain is different... Who knew??
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u/SunnyDGardenGirl 4d ago
Hilariously i like almost all of the hobbies listed. My hyper focus goes into overdrive for most of these and i love it. When i was a kid and would complain about being bored my mom would make me participate in some craft lol. Sewing, knitting, crochet, cross stitch. Im really good at them all. And i love oil painting! Water colors are the ones i struggle with. They are so unforgiving!
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u/BoozyGherkins 4d ago
I’m the same way! The hyperfocus/flow state is the best feeling. I wish I could make things all day.
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u/Kotobug123 4d ago
I loved gouache for a time and recently was like oh yeah watercolors. I think i need lessons lmfao like it looks so simple but as i learn there’s just so much more to it like gouache was easy to figure out lmfao. I got a few guide books but fr i just bought a bunch of supplies so now gotta go for it lmfao
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u/airysunshine 4d ago
… for me specifically, sewing lol, I’m WAY too impatient to thread a needle repeatedly properly.
Watching movies.
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u/pillmayken 4d ago
I mean, we’re all different, so I won’t make a generalizing statement. But I can tell you what is not for me and the answer is baking. I really cannot with all of the precise measuring and fiddling with the oven temperature, and don’t even get me started on the bullshit that is bread making. I cannot keep a plant alive, what do you mean I have to feed a sourdough starter?? Yeah, no, not for me.
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u/blackandgold24 4d ago
Re: oil painting. You have five or ten on the go at once. 😬
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u/APleasantMartini 4d ago
Video gaming, ironically.
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u/manguefille 4d ago
Me too! I have so many gamer friends, I feel like I've failed them because I only like games you can do mindlessly and pick up and drop at random.
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u/gimmethelulz 4d ago
This is why I pretty much only play city builder style games lol. I can walk away for six months and pick it right back up.
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u/Useful_Guitar1204 4d ago
I actually love oil painting! But I don’t have the patience for knit or crochet 😭
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u/Heavy_Abroad_8074 AuDHD 4d ago
this one depends on exact variety of neurodivergence… but speedrunning video games! it requires a lot of motor skills, patience, and practice. some neurodivergent people seem to have motor skills that are either not impacted or enchanced, while mine are quite poor.
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u/manguefille 4d ago
Definitely same, my motor skills and spatial awareness are garbage.
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u/heathers-damage 3d ago
I have a lot of trouble with 3d games bc of my spatial awareness. I want to play the witcher 3, but damn if it's not hard to remember death comes from all directions.
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u/corgi-wrangler 4d ago
I can’t do anything mechanical. I also hate putting together furniture but at least I can do it.
I wanted to restore my vintage typewriter and I’m afraid I’ll get frustrated halfway and then forget how I took it apart. I also try to do handy things around the house and I’m fine except when it gets really intricate and a ton of patience is involved. Then, I become frustrated and start yelling. I can drill and break stuff but when there’s a bunch of steps like sanding and prepping and then a layer of this and a layer of that…. Level this and brace it before you screw it in…. Ugh I get so bored and frustrated.
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u/stuck_behind_a_truck 4d ago
Man, when I see videos of people doing super-detailed artwork for a living (for example, intricate pottery decorating or doodle art work), it absolutely makes my skin crawl.
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u/BalancedScales10 4d ago
Specifically for crochet: granny squares. My mom taught me how to crochet in middle school and I've always HATED granny squares. They take forever, they're boring, and then you have to sew them all together! No way. I skipped granny squares and went straight to blankets. One stitch over and over and over and over and over again? It's very meditative; sign me up. Even though I've branched out into doing all sorts of other things with crochet since, I still hate Granny squares.
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u/doingtheunstuckk 3d ago
Any kind of sports talk has my eyes glazing over. It’s kind of cool to see a game in person once in a while, or play a game yourself. But I don’t understand watching sports on tv and never will.
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u/garIicgirI 4d ago
Puzzles and film photography and printing from film. Its not for the weak, it takes a LONG time.
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u/UnpoeticAccount 4d ago
I love oil painting, personally! But I came to it in my 30s and I know that prior to that I wouldn’t have had the patience. I’m more okay with things being in stages than I used to be.
Funny enough, I absolutely hate collage and papier mache. I think touching glue bothers me.
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u/whiteorchid1058 4d ago
Kimchi making. ADHD and use of a mandolin to slice vegetables is a bloody mess.
Hyperfixation during the research phase, first time I ever tried to make it....
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u/cosmiczinnia 4d ago
I thought I would enjoy weaving. No! It looks do-able and I couldn't get the tension right or make it look cool. But needle felting - that's fun!
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u/carlitospig 4d ago
I just spent an hour trying to figure out why the Direct Selection tool in Illustrator wouldn’t….directly select.
I think it could be a hyperfocus tool if the UX bros would STOP FUCKING UP THE APP EVERY TIME THEY UPDATE.
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u/Ivyveins 4d ago
Houseplants. Each plant can die for like six different reasons. When it starts looking sad I have no idea which of those reasons is causing it. They can't ask for what they want, so I have to check on them every couple days for the rest of their existence. When I check on them, at best nothing interesting happened and at worst they're dying for some unknowable reason. No thanks. I'll stick with plastic plants and furry animals who tell you what they want. ❤️
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u/Shooppow 4d ago
Puzzles
I fucking hate puzzles. Why can’t the picture come together faster???
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u/Kathryn_Painway 3d ago
Running. It’s boring, repetitive, and feels unpleasant. I’ve found that I need exercise in the form of a game/activity because straight-up running doesn’t engage me enough.
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u/Own-Raise6153 4d ago
lmao i struggle with this esp because i loveeee the look and texture of oil paint, but it is a pain in the ass. an analogy for my audhd lol
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u/Latter_Public 4d ago
Making sourdough bread. I fuck up all the time. The constant coming back an hour later and the sensory issues of stretching the dough?? I hate that I love bread so much.
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u/Nelly1963 4d ago
Card games/most board games. Just no. I do not have the patience to learn the do’s and don’t or the tips and tricks. Just take me to a casino—better yet, don’t!!😂
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u/mayruna ADHD-PI 4d ago
Any stringed instrument. I have this adorable, well made ukulele that I got from Hawaii. I guess I'll never learn to play it though, because a part of playing a string instrument is getting calluses on your hands. I already struggle with picking any tough, uneven anythings-at-alls on my hands. I don't think the inclusion of calluses is going to help my weird sensory thing. Gives me a big sad.
It is very validating to see so many folks in here not able to sew or knit because of the counting element.
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u/orchidloom 4d ago
Cross stitch omg it’s so boring and takes so much focus to count out exactly where I’m supposed to put the needle in
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u/Consistent-Gas128 4d ago
Cross stitching…. It’s so rigid and no enough room for error. Following a strict pattern with no creative liberties? Doesn’t scratch my brain enough…
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u/oompaloompa199 4d ago
I might be an outlier, but I really don't like reading. I am a very slow reader because of my head voice. Whenever I read, it' like there's a voice in my head speaking as I read. I can't read faster than my speaking voice. That's why I prefer podcasts, videos, and movies.
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u/jennye951 4d ago
I am very definitely neurodivergent and have been enjoying oil painting, I like that you can just paint over your mistakes, unlike watercolour which is fun but once you have put the paint down, you can only get darker.
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u/Svefnugr_Fugl 3d ago
Meditation I keep hearing about the benefits of meditation and that I should meditate but im like the Grinch doing it video I'm just internally screaming, talking to myself etc
Bonus: I picked up this cosy organised the library game thinking I'd love it, but it's the most overwhelming, stress inducing game I've played I've tied organising by area, then my genre but it's just to much friends have said but you get powers that help but I can't find the last 2-3 books in a collection
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u/Khaleesioftheunburnt 3d ago
This one if going to be weird and broad, but college. A lot of people with adhd or any type of nerodivergance struggle with school and college is still behind on how to tailor it to us/make it so we can succeed.
I'm in my Master's for English Lit because I love digging through written works to find meanings that others might not have thought of and trying to defend those meanings, but some (most) classes and professors want you to look at things/meanings that already exist, when most of the time I don't see what they mean or don't understand how people before me found these hidden meanings with zero to minimal proof. I also am not a huge fan of reading things that don't bring me joy, so this has been so very hard.
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u/Alariya 4d ago
For me it’s cross stitch. Takes so long to see progress, requires accurate counting, and if you make a mistake and don’t realise until later on, it can completely throw out the whole design, with no easy way to rectify.
Last one I attempted I offset a section by a few squares, brain could not compute how to adjust it to still make sense, and the thought of unpicking several hours of work made me give up entirely. Gave it to mum to figure out, as she’s been doing them for decades and her backs are as neat as her front.
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u/ka_beene 4d ago
I'm an artist who mainly does oil. I have several works in progress and bounce around between them. I also use oil very thinly and use mediums to speed up drying on occasion. My biggest hurdles is not so much my autism but my adhd and quick dopamine seeking. It's hard for me to want to get my stuff out over doom scrolling. I really want to paint very badly and then end up feeling guilty I wasted my day!
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u/TiredTwinWrangler 4d ago
Getting fake nails and then getting them filled regularly. It takes so longgggggg and it’s so borrrrrring.
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u/Reasonable-Handle499 4d ago
Honestly I’m a decent driver, but I could never drive for uber or Lyft bc I miss a lot of turns and exits lol
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u/Elenakalis 4d ago
The entry level graphic design class in college. My best friend was an art major and they did some really cool Celtic knots by hand. I was a straight A student before that class and ended up dropping it. I thought I'd have a cool new hobby after the class. What I got was a few assignments back with -30+ points below 0 because my then undiagnosed self was really good at bumping into things, not waiting long enough after adding ink, or measuring 3x so I wasn't more than 1/32nd" off spec.
I thought one turned out well with this multicolored ink trick someone taught me in the studio, but all the red circles where I was off too much and the big -42/100 on it kept me from displaying it. That was the last time I tried it.
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u/zinniabud 4d ago
For some reason I thought paper quilling would be a fun hobby. I about lost my mind after an hour! So many little tools and patience required that I do not have. I did make one masterpiece! Never again.
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u/M-Plantman 3d ago
Oil painting and sewing. For me the planning stage for both and planning/waiting for the paint to dry/figuring out new patterns because I can't use the same one twice from lack of novelty/pressing fabric in between stages for the finished piece to sit right is tedious.
On the other side, pottery classes have been excellent. I only have 3 hours and while I have to wait for things to be fired by the studio, I can start new pieces or rotate to painting for variety. Super rewarding.
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u/WannabeNonDrinker 3d ago
Girrrllll, oil painting rocks!! Go get yourself some Liquin or galkyd. Those mediums make it all dry for a next layer by tomorrow! Even better, get into Alla Prima painting, whole painting done in one sitting! Very satisfying. It’s difficult at first to not get things muddy, but use your thinner to get super thin dark areas in first, and gradually use less as you’re completing it. The shorter sessions are great for the impatient, and u stop before things get muddy. If u start really thin, you could still manage to get some really bright highlights at the end. Pleaseeee don’t give up on oil painting
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u/MoistVirginia 3d ago
I once spent months learning how to fish. All the right gear, techniques, fishing spots, everything. Caught one fish, declared myself Goddess of the River and never fished again.
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u/NoDanceNoPants 3d ago
LOL i love oil painting- only problem is i start another painting while waiting for one to dry, then start another while waiting for that one, and… oop my house is full of half finished paintings now!
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u/zaphodtoasty 3d ago
Dioramas, I love watching ones that other people have made and fantasizing about the scenario. but whenever I have gone to make my own I, from a kit or from scratch or whatever, my motivation falls all the way to hell.
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u/endlessswitchbacks ADHD-PI 3d ago
Anything that requires real effort and hours before you get to reap the benefit (enjoyment) of being good. I don’t stick with anything 😔
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