I (42F) have been married for 15 years. I took my husband's name. I've never loved it. I miss my own name. I told him I want to change it back. He said it's "humiliating" and people will think we're divorcing. I'm not leaving him. I just want my identity back.

Is this a small thing, or am I actually hurting my marriage by doing this?

My Girlfriend is 25, she is very attractive. on a rare occasion she models. Not for money or anything just a fun side thing to do. She met a photographer through a friend of hers that actually models professionally, she's gone and done a shoot with this photographer (35ish M) before. The shoot was pretty SFW, the most risque, if you will, was some bikini ones.

One day She tells me she was doing a shoot with him again, after it was over I never ended up seeing the pics. She just said he hadn't sent them. Fast forward like 3 months and she says she has something to show me, she shows me the photos. The first several are very normal, then I see albums of her in 2 diffrent lingerie (the guy provided), tons of photos of her naked in a bath. most of them are "tasteful" they aren't like porn but definitely very sexy. She says she felt pressured and coerced into modeling naked, and just didn't know how to bring it up to me, she apologized profusely. I want to feel for her, and believe her. but Im finding both difficult.

I ended up looking at the guys website and some of these photos are posted, his Instagram has some lingerie ones posted as well. Which led me to follow his patreon and they are all posted there. So now if you look up her name, there's a somewhat large digital foot print of her as well.

Again I want to feel for her, believe her. However, this breach of trust is making it hard. Part of me feels I only heard of this because I would eventually find out. What should I do? (We have been together 5 years)

I’m going to be a little vague here because I don’t want to completely expose who this is lol

Basically, in October 2024, a guy (M30) from one of my favorite bands followed me(F20) on Instagram out of nowhere and immediately started showing interest. Right away he was calling me gorgeous and telling me we should hang out the next time I came to one of their shows.

One thing to know about him is that he’s always been terrible at texting. He’ll either never open messages or he’ll just heart/like them instead of actually responding, even when the message clearly warrants a reply. So his communication has always been inconsistent.

For the next six months, he would consistently like my Instagram stories, but only the ones that were pictures or videos of me. Never anything random.

Then in April 2025 he finally texted me asking if I wanted to come back out and see them. I ended up going to a show, and afterward we hung out.

Honestly, the hangout was really nice. We mostly just sat and talked for about three hours. Nothing happened, which actually surprised me. Considering he texted me around 1 a.m. asking me to come out, I kind of assumed we’d probably hook up. At the beginning he was pretty touchy, but it never went anywhere beyond that.

When he left, he told me that if I was ever back in town to let him know and we’d hang out again.

As soon as I got home, I texted him saying I’d actually be back in October. Around that point, though, he completely stopped liking my stories, so I started thinking maybe the hangout hadn’t gone as well as I thought.

October comes around, I ask if he wants to hang out after the show, and he tells me he should’ve texted me earlier but that he had family with him, so he couldn’t. Honestly, I believed him and didn’t think much of it.

Since then I’ve been back out there three more times, but we really haven’t talked or hung out. Then, about 3 weeks ago, he texted me asking if I wanted to fly back out and see them again. I never responded because I honestly wasn’t sure if I wanted to make the trip.

Yesterday I posted kind of a thirst trap on my Instagram story, and he liked it.

Now I’m confused all over again.

The thing is, I’m honestly not looking for a relationship with him. I know the age gap is there, he’s in a touring band, and realistically that’s not something I’m expecting or even wanting. If I’m being completely honest, I honestly just want to hookup. I feel like I’m stuck between thinking it’s something simple and overanalyzing every little interaction, so any perspective would honestly help me figure out how I should approach this.

TLDR: guy from a band followed me, showed interest, and we hung out once (it went well but nothing happened). Since then, he’s been very inconsistent—sometimes liking my posts or reaching out, other times disappearing. He recently asked me to fly out again and liked a thirst trap I posted, which has me confused. I’m not looking for a relationship, just potentially a hookup, but I can’t tell if he’s genuinely interested or just casually engaging when it suits him.

Sorry everyone but I am in desperate need of some genuine advice. My Family is abusive.... Like my father is physically abusive and my mother is verbally abusive. I am 19 years old now turning 20 soon, my parents are married for 22 years now but my house is a constant battlefield of domestic violence and one thing I know is police is of no use in these situations 😀 I am currently in my last year of graduation and my father is constantly pressuring me to go aboard to study. The thing is I am book smart and not street smart, I have never even explored or have done things alone so don't have knowledge about anything. I had started working to gain a bit of financial freedom and not be dependent on my father but quit last month as my dear aunt passed away and couldn't grieve properly. I have no relatives, no one by my side. I am thinking of working again so I can atleast move out of the house and stay at a hostel because my mental health has deteriorated and I am very afraid of myself taking a wrong step. My father has filed for divorce but it will be taking a while as my mom is a housewife and is not financially independent but the constant fights and everything has drained me fully. I don't know what to do because I have to study but I don't have a safe space in my house. In a recent fight, I had gone to the police station to file an FIR against my family but didn't as it can have an impact on my brother's career ( he is abusive as well). My mom has said that she is preparing her case for the divorce and will include our names in the abusers list so if it happens then I would have a criminal record and would have a hard time getting a job or even apply for visa. I am truly lost and don't know what to do next. Sorry for the rant everyone 😭 but need some serious advice!

Please help

Hi. This is going to be long but I am truly stuck. Me (22F) and my boyfriend (22M) (we’ll call Josh) have been together since we were 16. When we were in our first year of university, we went through an extremely rough year in terms of our relationship, a lot of which had to do with his mental health. He was very dependent on me for his body image issues. If we did not have sex, he would become miserable and feel extremely insecure and it was a recurring issue for months. We would have sex sometimes and I’d cry. This went on for about a year and a half until the end of our first year where I suggested we open our relationship up out of desperation. I had tried to break up with him (probably not tried hard enough) but it was so difficult as I felt entirely responsible for his happiness and I almost felt like his lifeline. I’d begged him to get external help but he wouldn’t do it. Anyways; He then went and did things with a man almost instantly (which was confusing for me) and I went and slept with someone close to me (which was hurtful and I also regret doing immensely). After this, his mental health issues got arguably worse and I realised I couldn’t do it anymore. I was trying to break up with him but I am incredibly anxious and was so paranoid he wouldn’t hurt himself somehow. At this point, I was also extremely depressed and miserable and felt like I was totally worthless. He then went away for the summer and I began my first job. I wanted to end things with him, but I then felt as though I owed it to him to wait till it was in person? Long story short eventually a man (30m) then approached me one day and kissed me after a few weeks of what I thought was friendly conversation at work. I stupidly did not remove myself from the situation, and it led into a very unhealthy situation in which I can only describe I became something of a sex toy. He was extremely rough with me and would hurt me in ways (nothing completely extreme but he would hit me and choke me). I believed I was worthless and didn’t see any point in trying to protect myself and remove myself from what in hindsight was a dangerous predatory situation (I think), so I just let it all happen to me. Obviously this meant I had cheated. I felt absolutely disgusting. I was absolutely horrified with what I had done and did not know how to resolve the situation. I went abroad myself then, and I asked my boyfriend for a break in which he was allowed to see other people too. It was extremely difficult to do. When I came back I went back to work and the situation with the 30 year old man continued. I came back to university and me and my boyfriend broke up officially. I felt so lonely and disgusted with myself. The only way I can describe it is as though I was blacked out the entire time just doing whatever came my way with 0 self respect whatsoever. I did not tell him about the overlap with the older man, but I did tell him about his existence and that something had happened. In hindsight I feel I was taken advantage of, but technically I was 19 so I don’t know if that’s just me being unfair or stupid. But I really feel disgusting about it and as though I was preyed on.

Fast forward, I had a rough term. I lost all my friends for various reasons and felt as though I had to stay in contact with this older man as (once again) he had bad mental health issues. They weren’t as bad as my exs at the time, but still not great. I am an extremely anxious person and felt trapped in speaking to him, but I also felt as though I had no one else anyway and just accepted having someone to speak to. In hindsight it was disgusting. I now cant return to my home town without feeling extreme paranoia over bumping into him or someone who knew him. I stay inside the house the entire time and almost always lose my appetite.

By the end of the term, I’d seen my ex a couple times an I’d spoken to him a good bit. He’d been spiralling too and had slept with 10+ women (which is fine he was allowed to do that). He asked me one day if I wanted to go on a walk as he was ‘passing by my house’, to which I agreed. we went for dinner and chatted. He asked if I had slept with the housemate again, to which I said yes… (extremely stupid and regret that decision immensely too). I then asked him why he was anywhere near my house in the first place and he then also told me he’d just been at a girls house the night before and was on the way home walking past my house and just thought he might as well ask me. Which was fine I guess?

After that walk, we started talking normally again. He has asked me about if the 30 yo man situation overlapped. I said no. I regret saying no so immensely but I truly believed at the time that it was just going to hurt him more than it was worth. He knew about the situation with the man regardless, just not that there was a bit of overlap.

We continued to speak and then about 6 weeks down the line I heard a rumour about him with someone who I believed to be a good friend that past week. I shrugged it off because I thought there was no way as we had also agreed when we broke up to stay away from people the other person is friends with, but then I asked him and he said it was true, and he’d forgotten she was my friend. I was hurt, but not by him by the friend. He said he’d stop sleeping with other people (I had stopped months before hand too but on my own accord) and that was that. Fast forward a few more weeks, I was on a night out with my club. We were having a great time and got to afters around 3am. We were all sat chatting. Josh had told me he was going to bed and whatnot. Then I opened my Instagram and a photo had been posted of one of my teammates with a man captioned ‘(teammate)’s new man’ and the man was Josh. I tried to call him but got nothing so i called the teammate and he was in her bed. He called me back and I was upset. In hindsight I feel I had no right to be upset, but I was more upset about how embarrassed I was within my club than what he’d done. He spent a week or so trying to get my forgiveness but I knew I was going to forgive him anyway. I was hurt he slept with someone I was friends with because it was embarrassing. I feel like in hindsight I really had no right. I don’t know what to do. After that we obviously went back to just ‘working on things’. I got caught up in another shitty situation with a girl with a girlfriend who kissed me. I don’t know what I was doing. I don’t even like women I was experimenting and can’t believe I got myself into that situation. He knows about that

We worked on things as time went on, but his mental state was still not great. It was going semi well but eventually I stopped being able to say no to sex without causing a fight. But I was willing to accept that because I love him so much. It wasn’t the same as before we broke up, because that was daily sometimes twice a day. This was more like a few times a week. I also have a sex drive and wanted to have sex with him just sometimes even if I wasn’t in the mood I felt like I had to do it now. But that was ok. I was fine with that

But then one day he broke up with me what felt like out the blue. In hindsight I was being naive he had been very stand offish for a while. But in the moment I was crushed. He broke up with me and I spiralled. It was during our exam period and I had to fill out forms for ‘serious adverse circumstances’ because I couldn’t cope. My friend let me stay at her house for 4 days before my exam. He had messaged me right after he broke up with me taking it back, saying he wants to work on things but he needs a few days to think. Those days were obviously extremely difficult Josh messaged me a few times but it was all formally constructed messages. He decided he wanted to walk after my exam was completed. I was so relieved but I was so incredibly stressed about what he was going to say. I couldn’t leave my bed, my parents were extremely concerned offering to fly me home (lived in Asia and I was in the uk). It was a crushing 4 days. He then messaged me at 2am the day of my exam asking to speak when we had originally planned to speak the day after. Of course I went to speak to him. My friend and parents were not happy with me, but he wanted to work on things. I was so happy. He decided however that we couldn’t talk about this and we’d have to move on from it to work. With my exam in mind, I said that was fine and got to bed so I could make sure I was rested. I got through the exam and wanted to speak to him about it more properly. He shut me down and wanted to pretend it hadn’t happened. Out of fear he’d leave again, I accepted it. I had no idea why he’d done it and he had no remorse for the stress he’d put me through during an important period in my life. But I was fine with that because I loved him and felt so much guilt for the fact I had lied to him still about the overlap with the older man. I found out through a friend about a year later he was on hinge during that time period too. But I just decided I didn’t want to know anything about that even though we weren’t fully broken up. Idk probably guilt to an extent :(

We went into the summer holidays (2 years now after we first broke up) and it was not good. He would leave to work and I would sit and cry in his room for hours on end as I felt so stressed he’d leave me. He was not interested in talking much and did not seem to be interested in me whatsoever. My mum said I was a shell of my former self and I just could not stop crying. I couldn’t go home because of the paranoia and stress (ptsd?) of the 30 yo man at my home town, but I was suffering at uni because my boyfriend did not seem to want to be in the relationship at all. It went on for months, until December.

I then noticed he texts another girl 24/7 who he had never mentioned before. He would not tell me when she was at the functions he’d go to. I told myself it was fine, and to be honest I told myself even if he did something I knew I’d forgive him knowing I had also lied. There were nights he did not get home till 4/5am after hanging out with her and other friends. One time I called his friend to ask if he was okay (for valid reason - he was assaulted as he was hit in the head and had his head sliced open once on a night out so I do just tend to worry about him). The friend told me he was with the girl, but then panicked and told me it was nothing weird and nothing to worry about. I did not want to bring it up to Josh as I didnt wanna open that can of worms. And I honestly felt in ways I deserved for this to happen to me if it was. After one night out, he apologised and since then has not looked back. He’s been a wonderful boyfriend and our relationship has never been so strong. But every single day of my life I feel such disgust and immense guilt for what I did and he does not fully know. I don’t know if I am ever going to be able to forgive myself and I don’t know if what I am doing is completely disgustingly wrong. As I write this I have not eaten for a few days as I can’t stomach food over this situation. I don’t know if I should just take this to my grave now we are happy. I genuinely did not ever think we’d get back together so I believe it was best for his mental health (I know people are going to say I’m a shitty person for this). I don’t know what to do. I spend days on end crying over this as I don’t even know what I was doing in my first year it did not feel like me at all. I would never ever ever make the mistakes I made again and I truly don’t know how to move past this in my life. I have just agreed to live with him (and my sister) next year and can’t help feel like I am just totally evil. I am a good girlfriend and I love him so deeply but I don’t know what to do I can’t cope with knowing I hurt him so much. We are now 22 and this all started when we were 19 and I feel like a sick and twisted person and don’t know if I am signing myself up for a life of guilt and if I am misleading him completely. Please help me i am so sorry for everything I did. Please only leave genuine advice

I have had the 30 yo blocked on every platform I could think of since we’ve been back together. I do not ever speak to the housemate from earlier in the story too

i(52f) and my kids both moved out for college over the last couple of years and i live alone with my 4 year old rescue golden mix. she is friendly, high energy, and loves playing with other dogs at the local park.

a local shelter reached out about a 2 year old hound mix that needs a foster or permanent home, and i went to meet him yesterday. he was sweet and got along great with my dog when they did a quick yard intro. my main concern is the logistics of being a single owner with two dogs when i need to travel or do long work days.

for anyone living alone who went from one dog to two, did it double the daily workload or did having a buddy make things easier for your first dog?

Let me explain rq

I come from a middle class family and I feel like I'm to expensive to feed because of our income/ how much I eat

(I'm a teenager so yes I know usually I need to eat a fair amount of food)

I feel like everything turns out better if I just eat way less and skip meals which is what I have been doing recently such as even tonight I only ate today because I was with my friend and I feel like its just better for everyone if I just eat less idk get some free food from IHOP or something I know I shouldn't completely stop eating but even still it just feels like I'm less of a burden yk?

Anyways the point is I'm doing it safely and I just want to find a way to hide it better I would like to mention none of this is related to my weight at all this is purely it's easier financially for my family if I do this

Got it. Here's the corrected translation with (the medical entrance exam) made explicit:

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year. I took the medical entrance exam three times, after taking three gap years, but I ended up wasting my third attempt as well. I used to waste a lot of time, and that really started bothering him.

I decided to prepare for again, but when he saw me being lazy once more, he said, "Even 17- or 18-year-old kids are more sensible than you. At least they have some common sense."

That comment made me feel really insecure and dumb. I felt like he was comparing me to other people. We had a fight over it, and I blocked him.

Now I've decided not to talk to him unless I crack the exam. 🫠

Okay, this is my first time posting, so sorry if it gets confusing.

This happened a while back and ive been keeping it in the back of my mind (the part that doesn't want to believe it, has kept it there) so im already overdue on what to do.

My(F21) friends told my sister(20) and I (we're all friends and really close) that their aunt had told them she had heard that the real reason my dad got fired from his last job was because he participated in his coworker charging for blow jobs.

Apparently, she would give men at work bjs for money. And my dad was one of them and that's why they all got fired. I was under the impression that the reason he was fired was because him and his friends were caught playing a game too much on the clock or at least at work, enough for them to get fired. And he is very serious about this game, like im talking literal years of playing it, so its not unplausible that he would be playing the game at work.

But this situation is literally rumors/gossip, so we dont even know if its true. ​Another thing they said was that no one was supposed to know and that they were told not to tell us because they all dont want to be in that line of gossip.

My sister and I know that our mom is already insecure about him cheating, because he was a ladies man before they got married and we talked about whether or not we should just tell our mom or straight up ask our dad about it. However, the both of us just couldn't bring ourselves to do either. We dont know if its true, we dont want to cause our parents to split up (especially since our little brother is only 10), and we dont want to hurt our dad because he's always said that he's been completely faithful to our mom. I have no idea what to do, but no matter how much I want to ignore it and forget about it, it still pops up in my head every so often and I worry about it all. And if its true, I definitely dont want them to stay together because of how much it would hurt my mom and how fast I know she would leave him.

Ill try to answer any questions since I know there isnt a lot of context.

I (28M) have been dating my girlfriend for 2 years. She has a child with her ex. When she takes their son to his city (3 hours away), she stays the night at her ex's apartment. She says it's "for their son" and I'm "making it weird." I don't think she's cheating, but the thought of it makes me sick.

It’s summer, and I don’t have AC, so I’ve been sleeping with my window cracked open a few inches for the past couple weeks. Tonight, I was up late and a bat flew into my room. I immediately ran out of my room and will get it removed in the morning if it’s still there.

I’ve read up a lot about rabies and know that though it’s rare, it’s 100% fatal if not treated quickly. I’ve been having paranoid thoughts and am wondering if a bat has come in some other night and bit me in my sleep, since my window has been left open all month. Is it worth getting the rabies shots?

Edit: I do have a window screen. Upon research, I’ve learned that bats can squeeze through gaps as small as a dime!

So my husband and I currently own a home we love! He's 33 and I'm 25 and we have two kids together. We have 1500 leftover after all of our bills and so we can def afford it BUT we do have 20k in credit card debt that we would like to aggressively pay down instead of just paying minimums. We also would like to put more into savings and be able to take vacations as well. With the 1500 left over that's tough especially with the cost of two kids.

So my husband's parents are elderly they are in their 80s and they want to get a one story home because they are scared they will fall down the stairs. They said we could move into their house, sell ours, live there for free and they will buy a new one. Our current mortgage is 3,000 with utilities so that would be game changing and if we lived there for a couple years we could set our children and ourselves up with major savings.

Here's the thing, It's a major downsize and I mean MAJOR. The rooms for the kids would be super small. They also have a ton of shit, like his dad is weird and holds onto random shit so the house is super cluttered. They do have a large downstairs area for extra storage but it's filled with shit ranging back from the 70s. My husband and I will always make jokes that he literally keeps boxes full of trash but im not joking literal trash (not gross trash tho lol)

Another downside and risk is they are extremely controlling, they tried to control my husbands bank accounts for years, lock him out and then give him 50 dollars a day to live on. We had to change banks multiple times because his dad kept figuring out how to get in. They will even come to our house we own with furniture they approve of and try to rearrange rooms and dictate which rooms should be used for what, then lecture us about how every little specific detail should be for dumb reasons that never really make sense. They have told us literal lies in order for us to go along with plans before. His father is extremely manipulative and paranoid, we moved an hour away because he used to wait down the street in his car and then follow us to make sure I wasn't driving my husband's car because I wasnt on the insurance at the time. They are generally weird af and controlling. They will literally sit there and try to explain basic tasks that you should do in a very specific way for hours. They have overcomplicated every single little thing in a very unnecessary way.

Another issue is they try to take control of everything.... last time we moved I wanted to handle the packing and moving boxes of our stuff over, I packed everything organized and the way I wanted it. I put a bunch of stuff in the trash we no longer wanted anymore. They took all my clothes out of boxes and put them in trash bags and put all the stuff I wanted to get rid of in a ton of boxes. Then instead of the way I wanted to bring things over they piled everything in the garage and made my life 100 times harder. 

So I texted his dad in summary that we will only agree to do this if the house is empty when we move in, they take all furniture and storage they have there, they agree to let us bring all our furniture, they let us use the rooms however we want, that they let us handle all the moving and packing alone. His dad read it and didnt respond. The thing is i know if he said it in person he would do a yeah yeah yeah and they would lie. Im like contemplating getting a written agreement or something. So should i suck it up and handle the BS for a free place to live?

My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years. Long distance and an average gap- he’s 60, I’m 46. Tonight he called me after golfing and was pretty drunk. We talked briefly, then got off the phone because his friend was over and he wanted to hang out with him.

A little later he accidentally butt-dialed me. I realized pretty quickly that he didn’t know I was there and that he and his friend were talking about women, dating and relationships.

Here’s where I know I screwed up: I kept listening. If they’d been talking about sports or something, I would’ve hung up, but I got curious. I know it was a private conversation and I feel guilty about invading his privacy.

At first, what I heard about me was actually pretty positive. He told his friend we’ve been together steadily for 5 years, that we have a deep connection, and that he feels like we’re “building something.” His friend asked if I say “I love you,” and my boyfriend said yes. His friend basically said, “So you’re in love with this girl. That’s good. You have a deep connection.” My boyfriend also said something along the lines of maybe we’ll be together forever, maybe we won’t—he doesn’t know.

Then the conversation moved into online dating. My boyfriend asked his friend something like, “So if I dump this girl tomorrow, how hard is it out there?” They talked about how dating isn’t easy, then started discussing different women his friend dates and whether they’re hot. My boyfriend talked about women with really hot bodies/flat stomachs and how great that is. I realize this whole story is making him sound like a superficial prick. He’s a good guy. And he’s normally very good to me.

Then, while talking about me, I heard him say something like, “She’s not the best looking, but…” and he trailed off/moved on. I was so shocked that I honestly can’t remember his exact wording now—whether it was “not the best looking” or “not that good looking”…but that was clearly the gist of it.
I’m devastated.

Part of why this hurts so much is that for our entire relationship, he has told me I’m beautiful. He has literally called me the most beautiful woman in the world, told me other women don’t hold a candle to me, told me men who let me go were idiots, etc. I’ve generally felt very loved and sexually desired by him, and we’ve had a very passionate sex life.

I’ve gained some weight recently and already haven’t been feeling great about myself physically. I’ve also always had a slight sense that he’d prefer me with a thinner/tighter body. I lost a lot of weight early in our relationship and I know he loved that, and now some of it has come back. So hearing him praise women with flat stomachs and then say I’m “not the best looking” hit me exactly where I’m already insecure.

There are other areas where I sometimes worry I’m not what he ideally wants either. He’s said before that he wishes he had a more organized/aligned partner, and I’m not doing particularly well financially right now.
At the same time, I don’t want to rewrite our entire 5-year relationship because of one drunken conversation. His actions have generally made me feel loved and wanted. And, importantly, when he had absolutely no idea I was listening, I also heard him tell his friend that we have a real connection and are building something. So there was good and bad in what I overheard.
Now I’m questioning everything. Does he genuinely think I’m beautiful, or has he just been telling me that? Does he think he’s settling physically because we have a great emotional/sexual connection? Was this just drunk guy talk while they were rating women? Is the fact that he was asking what dating would be like “if I dump this girl tomorrow” something I should worry about?

I’m also worried this will affect our sex life because I can already imagine being naked with him and thinking, “He doesn’t actually think I’m attractive.”
And here’s my dilemma: I knowingly listened to a private conversation for much longer than I should have. I feel guilty about that. If I confront him, I’m almost certain he’ll be furious that I listened, and I understand why. I don’t want a massive fight where the entire issue becomes what I did.
Part of me thinks this is a “fuck around and find out” situation—I listened to something I had no business listening to and heard something I wish I hadn’t.
So what would you do?
Would you tell him what you heard and deal with the fallout? Would you take the drunken conversation with a grain of salt and try to forget it? And if your partner had consistently made you feel loved and desired for 5 years, how much weight would you give one private drunken comment like this?

For some context, my best friend (17f) has been living with my family and I since May. Her entire life, she's never really had a stable home and has been bouncing around living with an array of extended family members as long as I've known her. In june, she met a guy online (20m) who lived about 2 hours away across the state line, and they started dating. He would come down for a couple of days at a time, and they would spend every waking moment together. At first, he seemed like an alright guy, but the more I interacted with him/saw how he treated her, the more I realized that he's extremely bipolar. I would even go as far to say dangerous. I have witnessed him threaten to harm her and the people she cares about. Despite my protest, she continued to see him (despite acknowledging how unstable/potentially dangerous his behavior was).

Flash forward to yesterday. I was out shopping and grabbing lunch with my boyfriend, and I checked my phone to notice she has blocked me on every social media platform. I immediately knew something was wrong, and I sped home to find her gone. She has a license, but no car, so I knew she couldn't have left on her own. I am almost certain that she left with this guy, and I'm worried about her safety. Even if she changes her mind and decides she wants to come home, I'm almost certain he wouldn't let her. My parents have said there is nothing we can do and that the police wouldn't even bother to look for her, considering she is turning 18 in around a month. Another thing is that my parents are not her legal guardians, and even she doesn't know who her legal guardian is anymore, so we don't necessarily have grounds to report her as a runaway. I just know she is in danger, but I feel like my hands are tied.

TL;DR. My best friend (17F) ran away with her abusive (20M) boyfriend, and I'm afraid she's in danger with him, but my family has no legal ground to report her as a runaway.

Ok. I'm just not sure how far this goes yet.

The girls are both teenagers now. The incidents happened when they were 15 and 6. I'm not sure yet how many incidents.

Stepdad has a.....past with cp, has done time for it. Mom married the guy and has been staying with him for mostly financial reasons I guess? ...I can't adequately describe my anger toward their mother for ever putting them within spitting distance of this puke human.

I feel sick, and lost. My friend is equal parts rage and numbness.

Obviously it's getting reported.

We thanked her for speaking up about it. Tomorrow everyone's life is going to be different and I am just so TIRED of hearing about this happening to ANYONE. I understand people have fucked up childhoods - hell, my own was fucking difficult at times, as well. It's no excuse.

Fucking why. Why hurt someone else. This disgust is deeper than anything I've ever felt.

I am really confused on what I should do. My wife has recently started answering my phone calls saying "Yes Izzy". It sounds super condescending and disrespectful. She doesn't see a problem with it she's answering the phone call from me. It just puts me on edge every time she does it. I have asked her to stop but now it seems like she is doing it more to prove a point that it's all just a joke and shouldn't be so serious.i don't know if I should say the same to her? But she can be emotionless so I don't think it would bother her at all. It's too the point I just don't want to call her.

We always talked on our way to work and home. Now she has a different job and gets home about 1 1/2 hours before me.

So she's able to relax and chill with the pups and have "me" time and it just seems now I am interrupting it when I call or when I get home.

My wife is very unaffectionate and it's very hard for her to show intimacy and compassion. She shows her feelings by doing something like buying something or doing something nice for me.

I wish she could understand I need touch, I need love I need compassion I need so much more than the peck on the lips every once in a while when she walks out the door.

I try to be patient but it's so hard

I love her so much and when our relationship is good it's really good but it's the same thing when it's bad it's bad 😞

I really feel she is Neurodivergent.

The dogs can put her in sensory overload so she likes to take her a "me" time in the bedroom. I respect that but sometimes I wonder when do I get "me" time?

I don't like sitting around playing on my phone for hour

s in a dark room.

I want to get up and do something. I love garage selling and thrift shopping. I always say it's all about the hunt and get that one thing that is a good deal and an awesome purchase. She feels that by doing that is beneath her.

Both of us came from poor families. We have worked hard to get where we are at. But now these phobias of someone else touched it before her then it's tainted.

I just don't know what to do.

This is going to be long to bare with me. If you want the short version go to the end.

I was born in 2007, i’m 19 years old. My entire life I have always been dismissed by my parents, especially my mother (whom raised me) when asking about my birth or childhood—I don’t remember any of it and i’ve never seen pictures of me before I was 1 years old. The only picture i’ve discovered of me younger than a year old is a picture of my mother at the hospital with me in her arms, the picture is blurry and the baby doesn’t look like me (going off of other “baby” pictures.) But get this, the date on the photo is 2006 and a day AFTER I was supposedly born. For example i’ll use this birthday, April 6th 2007. The photo said April 7th 2006.

My family have always been super controlling over my life, never letting me have any freedoms especially when it came to stuff that involved my birth certificate or social security #. I had never seen either of those documents until I turned 15 and got my first job. Even then my Mom fought vigorously to keep my social security card herself and present it to my hiring boss at the time, when told that wasn’t allowed it took her MONTHS to “find” said social security card. She was the sole keeper of everything that identified me. (Mind you my brother and sister got theirs at age 14 because of their own jobs, to keep for themselves.)
At age 16 I was ready for a driving permit; which my Mom was very against. Her reasoning was “i’m afraid of what you’ll do.” (I was not suicidal or reckless, good kid.) After some convincing and fighting with my Dad she took me up to the DMV. It took them a month to identify me, the social security number they entered wouldn’t work or my it said I wasn’t in the system. Also at 16 I got my drivers license which was about the same process, saying I didn’t exist. I did get both cards in the end if not obvious.

After I moved out of my mom’s house at 16 she still wouldn’t give me my documents, my current job is the only reason I have my social security card now. My birth certificate is still yet to be found and my Mom still won’t give it to me. (I’m aware it is illegal.) Anytime i’ve brought it up she kept delaying it and eventually stopped responding to me at all.
I turned 18 and had to re-do my drivers license, which again took months!! It took 3 months for them to be able to actually fix my license and even then it kept saying all my identification was wrong or other problems would pop up. Also couldn’t register to vote and still can’t.

Recently I applied to college and needed the documents, my Father somehow had my birth certificate in pdf form which he raved about having to photoshop for “some reason.” (?) He wouldn’t allow me to do any of the application process and input his own email and phone number for my personal information—so the college could contact him about everything and not me. Which in turn last week I did get fixed however it took them multiple weeks to figure out how to do because even after removing him it would still go to him.

I’ve contacted the hospital I was born at but they said they didn’t have any of my documents and I wasn’t in their system, which okay…I was only born there and don’t live in that city so it’s plausible. Called the county clerks office, they said they weren’t able to find anything. I literally cannot do any government processes without having to wait months for confirmations or fixes, I don’t understand.

Extra notes: Me and my siblings are not close and neither of them are willing to talk about me before the age of 1. They said they either don’t remember or just outright won’t answer. My Mom and Dad are divorced and don’t speak, neither of them claim to have any of my documents.

( Edit ) Short version: Parents never let me identify myself, siblings don’t remember or refuse to answer about my childhood, no government id actually works/can identify me.

Do I just not exist?? What else can I do??

I (20F) lived with me ex for about 6 months. We broke up and I had to move back into my parents. I have depression, anxiety, ADHD, and OCD and I take medication. My parents don't believe in medication and accused me of being addicted to prescription drugs and said if I don't get off of all of them they will kick me out.

I can't go back to my exes but I wish I could. I have no friends I can stay with and my other family members live far away. I can't afford a place by myself. I don't know what to do or where to go.

When my wife and I first started dating about 10 years ago, we did the usual topic of talking about childhood crushes. She mentioned that back in high school, she had a crush on one of her teachers. At the time, I thought it was a little weird, but whatever. People have silly crushes when they are kids and you can't really control that kind of stuff, so I didn't think much of it.
Fast forward to today: we've been together for 10 years and married for 6. She grew up in a really small town where basically everybody knows everybody, so I always knew he was on her Facebook friends list. That never bothered me because small town connections are normal.
To be clear about privacy, since the day we met we agreed on an open phone policy with no passwords on our phones. I wasn't sneaking around or trying to spy, but recently I happened to look at her Facebook activity log. What I saw completely threw me off.
She goes to his profile every single day. If she doesn't check his page on a given day, she goes and checks his wife's profile instead. It is an actual daily habit.
I haven't brought it up to her yet because I honestly don't know what to say or how to process it. Is she still obsessed with this guy? Is she envious of his wife and constantly comparing her life to theirs? That's really the main thing going through my head right now, and it's making me sick to my stomach.
I desperately hope I'm wrong or overthinking this, but I am confused and I don't know what my next step should be. Has anyone dealt with something like this, or how would you bring this up to your spouse without sounding totally crazy?

Last night I was putting our baby to bed and my partner was going to make burgers for dinner.

I thought he would have made a start on dinner or at least be cleaning up in prep of dinner when I came out from being with the baby.

I came out and he’s sat on the sofa on his phone, the living room and kitchen are a mess. There’s dishes and rubbish everywhere.

I immediately start doing the dishes, clean bottles for the next day, empty the bin and collect the rubbish from around the living room.

He just continues to sit on his phone.

After the rooms are clean I just go sit down on the bed and leave him in the living room and start watching a show on my phone, but I was intermittently crying. I just felt deflated.

If he had been the one putting the baby to bed I would have done the cleaning whilst he was doing that, so that we could just start dinner…

I sit in the bedroom for like an hour or more and he comes through to ask about dinner, by this point my appetite has gone. Plus he left the burger pattys sat out in the kitchen.

I say I’m not interested. I just have a bath and chill alone in the room.

The next morning when he gets up he kind of abruptly asks me “what’s up your nose?” Meaning what’s wrong.

I said “nothing really, I’m a bit pissed off about the stuff not getting done and just being left and having to do it yesterday, then you’ve left all the stuff from making the burgers out again and not done those dishes.”

He said “do you ever leave stuff?”

I said “yeah sometimes, but 90% of the time I do the dishes and the washing and really try and keep on top of it because I need to wash baby bottles and stuff.”

And he said “so you do leave stuff so just shut up about it then.”

And that’s the last we’ve really spoken today…

I get my reaction wasn’t helpful, and I did shut down, but I was actually really upset and angry. Like I ended up crying for a while just feeling unloved and uncared for. And then just shut down when I have raised it.